E228 - "Love is neither plus nor minus"

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The new Gintama anime has been running for half a year. It's already been half a year? We've finally made it through half a year?
SIGN    The world may change around us, but we're still rolling along here.
SIGN    Kodokan Dojo
[01:48] Shin
    S-Sis...
[01:49] Shin
    I-I...
[01:51] Shin
    I got myself a g-girlfriend!
[01:57] Otae
    What? A girlfriend?
[02:00] Shin
    I'm in a relationship with a girl.
[02:04] Otae
    R-Really?
[02:05] Otae
    I-I see...
[02:07] Otae
    In that case, congratulations, Shin-chan.
[02:10] Shin
    You approve of our relationship?!
[02:13] Shin
    I was up all night,
     worrying about telling you.
[02:16] Shin
    A-Actually, I brought her here
    so I could introduce you.
[02:19] Otae
    Huh?
[02:20] Shin
    Will you meet her?
     I'll tell her to come in!
[02:23] Otae
    Wait! She's here?
[02:27] Otae
    Isn't it a little early for this?
[02:30] Shin
    Don't worry. She's not that
    fussy about that stuff.
[02:34] Shin
    Come in, Momo-san.
[02:37] Shin
    Sis!
[02:39] Shin
    This is my girlfriend, Momo-san!
[02:42] Momo
    Hello.
SIGN    Love Is Neither Plus Nor Minus
[02:50] Kusano
    Right now, Edo is obsessed
    with the new game Love Choris.
[02:53] Kusano
    In this dating sim,
[02:55] Kusano
    the game is linked to the real world
    as events progress in real time.
[02:59] Kusano
    When you start the game in the
    morning, she says good morning.
[03:01] Momo
    Good morning.
[03:02] Kusano
    At night, she says good evening,
    and this is only the beginning.
[03:04] Momo
    Good evening.
[03:06] Kusano
    This game is made so well that
    Edo is filled with boyfriends
[03:10] Kusano
    who can't bear to
[03:11] ---
    spend a minute away from their little lovers.
[03:11] Shin
    Huh, that's not good.
[03:15] Shin
    If you waste all your time because
[03:17] ---
    you can't distinguish
    between game and reality,
[03:19] Shin
    you'll never get a real girlfriend.
[03:22] Shin
    Isn't that right, Momo-san?
[03:25] Shin
    I wish we could share some
    of our happiness with them.
[03:28] Shin
    Here you are.
[03:30] Gin
    It seems that I'm not wanted
    here, so I'll be making my exit.
[03:35] Otae
    Hey, where are you going?!
[03:38] Gin
    And I ask you where your brother has gone?
[03:41] Gin
    He's trapped in some dimension
    between game and reality.
[03:44] Otae
    He showed up with that thing and said that
[03:46] Otae
    he wanted to introduce me to his girlfriend,
[03:48] Otae
    and he's been like this ever since.
[03:49] Kagura
    It's okay.
[03:51] Kagura
    When Sadaharu is in heat, he
    keeps humping stuffed animals.
[03:54] Kagura
    After a while, he'll stop.
[03:56] Otae
    That won't work! Shin-chan
    is in heat all year round!
[04:00] Gin
    You girls don't think much
    of Shinpachi-kun, do you?
[04:03] Otae
    Are dating sims supposed
    to turn men into that?
[04:08] Gin
    I wouldn't know.
[04:09] Kondo
    You see, Otae-san,
[04:12] Kondo
    dating sims are games where the
[04:14] ---
    goal is to score with the many beautiful girls who show up.
[04:17] Gin
    Why is this guy showing himself
    like nothing is wrong?
[04:20] Gin
    Why is he acting like he's
    been up there the whole time?
[04:22] Kondo
    In other words, this is
    the only way to enjoy love
[04:24] Kondo
    for men who have no luck with women.
[04:27] Kagura
    You would know, wouldn't you?
[04:30] Kondo
    In other words, the worse
    a guy does with girls,
[04:33] Kondo
    the more likely he is to
    get hooked on dating sims.
[04:36] Kondo
    So a super S-class cherry boy like
    Shinpachi-kun will stand no chance.
[04:38] Kagura
    A super S-class stalker shouldn't be talking.
[04:41] Kondo
    This game was able to completely
    hook a veteran date simmer like me.
[04:45] Kondo
    It is difficult to describe the
    destructive powers of this game.
[04:48] Kondo
    That's what my girlfriend Sayaka-chan said.
[04:51] Sayaka
    I'm Sayaka.
[04:52] Gin
    Those destructive powers did a number on you.
[04:54] Otae
    Th-This can't be!
[04:55] Otae
    Does that mean Shin-chan might
    never return from the dark side?!
[05:01] Kondo
    Sayaka-chan!
[05:04] Gin
    Did you try to make contact?
[05:06] Otae
    Yes, I was looking for a chance
    to take the game away from him...
[05:10] Shin
    What are you doing?
[05:12] Shin
    Please don't touch Momo-san!
[05:14] Kondo
    He's so mentally unstable that he
    thinks the game is his girlfriend.
[05:19] Kondo
    If you want to reach out to him,
[05:21] ---
    you must join him in his little world!
[05:24] Gin
    How do we do that?
[05:26] Kondo
    That should be obvious.
[05:27] Game
    Welcome to the world of Love Choris.
SIGN    Name
SIGN    Birthday
SIGN    Blood Type
[05:29] Game
    Please begin by inputting your name
[05:31] ---
    as the name of the main character.
SIGN    Gintoki Sakata.
[05:34] Gin
    Hey! Why do I have to play this crap?!
[05:38] Kondo
    To bring Shinpachi-kun
    back to the real world.
[05:41] Gin
    Don't give me that crap!
[05:42] Gin
    That'll take too long!
[05:43] Gin
    How am I supposed to get
    hooked on a kiddie game?!
[05:45] Kondo
    It doesn't matter if you
    get hooked on the game.
[05:48] Kondo
    You just need to be in
    the same world as he is.
[05:50] Gin
    Why don't you go talk to Shinpachi?
[05:52] Kondo
    You think Shinpachi-kun
    is going to listen to me?
[05:56] Kondo
    First, you need to choose
    one of the three heroines.
[05:59] Kondo
    Love Choris is a game where
    you win over one of the
[06:02] Kondo
    heroines and engage in a
[06:04] ---
    real-time relationship that
    is amazingly realistic.
[06:08] Kondo
    The first heroine is Sayaka Otakai-chan.
[06:10] Kondo
    She is the captain of the railway
    club that you're also in.
[06:13] Kondo
    An excellent student and athlete
[06:14] ---
    who's also Isao Kondo-kun's girlfriend.
[06:16] Gin
    Why are you part of her description?
[06:17] Sayaka
    I sure like you.
[06:19] Gin
    You just happened to choose
    her as your heroine.
[06:21] Kondo
    The second heroine is Momo Anigasaki-san.
[06:23] Kondo
    She's one year older than the main character
[06:25] ---
    and the helpful older sister type.
[06:27] Kondo
    Shinpachi-kun chose her as his heroine.
[06:29] Gin
    Why did he choose an older sister character?
[06:31] Gin
    That's pretty disgusting.
[06:32] Kondo
    You don't want to choose
[06:33] ---
    the same heroine or people will get jealous.
[06:36] Kondo
    Which means you're left
    with the third character.
[06:40] Kondo
    Pinko Shiramizu.
[06:42] Gin
    Wait a sec!
[06:43] Gin
    This character is noticeably
    different from the others!
[06:46] Kondo
    Pinko-chan is the owner
    of a Chinese restaurant
[06:48] ---
    that the main character frequents.
[06:50] Kondo
    She's a widow who lost her
    husband, Takuzo, a while back.
[06:52] Gin
    This is obviously Pinko!
[06:54] Gin
    It's like she's from a
    totally different world!
[06:56] Gin
    Give me Sayaka-chan or Momo-san!
[06:59] Kondo
    Hmm, but they will be very difficult.
[07:02] Gin
    Doesn't matter.
[07:03] Gin
    It feels better when you finally land them!
[07:06] Kondo
    No, that's not what I mean.
[07:09] Kondo
    To choose a heroine,
[07:10] ---
    you have to shoot down the one you want.
[07:12] Gin
    Why is it a shooting game?!
[07:13] Kondo
    And it takes a long time before
    Sayaka-chan or Momo-chan show up.
[07:16] Gin
    The hell, it's like I'm
    Making It Through Pinko!
[07:21] Kondo
    Oh, now you've done it.
[07:23] Kondo
    You're stuck on Pinko-chan's route now.
[07:26] Gin
    There is no other route, is there?
[07:28] Gin
    How did you guys get normal heroines?!
[07:30] Gin
    Forget it! Let's just get this over with!
[07:32] Gin
    I'll just win over Pinko!
[07:33] Kondo
    But first...
[07:36] Kondo
    You have to decide what you
    want Pinko-chan to call you.
[07:38] Gin
    I don't give a damn!
[07:39] Kondo
    It's more fun if you have her call you by that.
[07:42] Gin
    If she wasn't Pinko, maybe!
[07:44] Gin
    Forget it! Gintoki will do!
[07:45] Gin
    This is good enough!
[07:48] Pinko
    Takuzo.
[07:49] Gin
    She's completely ignoring me?!
[07:51] Gin
    She didn't even say my name!
[07:53] Gin
    She's still stuck on Takuzo!
[07:55] Kondo
    But you can choose between the pronunciations
[07:58] ---
    Takuzo, Takuzo‘!, and Takuzo“!
[07:59] Gin
    They're all the same!
[08:01] Kondo
    The ones on the right are Takuzo.
[08:03] ---
    The ones on the left are Takuzo“!.
[08:05] Gin
    Another choice that
    involves a shooting game?!
[08:07] Gin
    They're all Takuzo!
[08:09] Gin
    Can I just start this game already?!
[08:11] Gin
    Okay! I can finally begin!
[08:13] Kondo
    Right, your next choice is about the
[08:15] ---
    catchphrase for Pinko-chan's
    child, Enari-kun.
[08:17] Kondo
    How do you want him to pronounce,
    "That's not helping, okay?"
[08:20] Gin
    Enough is enough already!
[08:22] Kondo
    You're going to become his new father.
[08:25] Kondo
    It's important to build a strong
    relationship with her son.
SIGN    Sengoku BABASAN
SIGN    That's not helping, okay?
[08:27] Kondo
    The right castle is "That's
    not helping, okay?"
SIGN    That's not helping, otay?
[08:29] Kondo
    The left castle is "That's
    not helping, otay?"
SIGN    Proceed
SIGN    Secure Weapons
    Secure Provisions
[08:31] Gin
    There's no way I have to
    play a simulation game.
[08:33] Gin
    I'm not wasting my time on this shit!
[08:36] Kondo
    Man, you don't know how to treat a lady.
[08:41] Kondo
    If you turn off the power without saving,
[08:43] ---
    your relationship will suffer.
[08:45] Gin
    Huh?
[08:46] Kondo
    For example, my game shut down abruptly when
[08:49] ---
    Otae-san laid the smack down.
[08:51] Kondo
    When I restart the game...
[08:53] Sayaka
    Geez...
[08:54] Sayaka
    You just turned off the game again.
[08:56] Sayaka
    What was that for?
[08:56] Gin
    Huh? What is this? What is this?
[08:58] Sayaka
    I told you to be gentle.
[09:02] Gin
    What's with her? She's throwing a fit.
[09:05] Kondo
    Sorry! Forgive me!
[09:08] Sayaka
    You want me to forgive you?
[09:09] Sayaka
    Then you have to kiss me ten times.
SIGN    I'm not jealous or anything.
[09:13] Kondo
    Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!
    Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!
[09:20] Sayaka
    I love you, Isao-kun!
[09:22] Kondo
    And I love you, Sayaka-chan!
[09:26] Kondo
    Do you understand the capabilities
    of Love Choris now?
[09:29] Kondo
    They're breathing on the
    other side of the screen.
[09:32] Gin
    B-But they're 2D.
[09:35] Gin
    You should look at yourself in the
    mirror. I guarantee you'll cry.
[09:38] Kondo
    Don't be so stubborn.
[09:39] Kondo
    Apologize and patch up your relationship.
[09:42] Gin
    I-It's not worth it.
[09:43] Gin
    I mean, my girlfriend is Pinko.
[09:45] Kondo
    The girls change according
    to the player's preference.
[09:49] Kondo
    That's the best thing about Love Choris.
[09:52] Kondo
    She might be Pinko now,
[09:53] Kondo
    but eventually, she may turn
    into the girl of your dreams.
[09:56] Gin
    No, no, no. We're talking 2D here.
[09:59] Gin
    Well, I guess...
[10:00] Gin
    If you really insist, I
    might give it another shot.
[10:05] Gin
    So, what do I do after I turn it on?
[10:08] Kondo
    Didn't you see what happened in my case?
[10:10] Kondo
    My girlfriend gave me the cold shoulder
[10:11] Kondo
    because I suddenly turned off the game.
[10:14] Kondo
    You need to do some sucking up.
[10:17] Pinko
    That was just despicable how
    you turned off the game.
[10:20] Gin
    You're right.
[10:21] ---
    She's so mad that she won't even look at me.
[10:22] Gin
    That's amazing.
[10:23] Pinko
    It's all your fault... All your fault...
SIGN    Her Enari is cold and stiff now.
[10:29] Gin
    Hey!
[10:30] Gin
    Cold shoulder?! More like cold Enari!
[10:33] Gin
    I can't fix this now!
[10:37] Kondo
    It looks like you were too violent
    when you turned off the game.
[10:40] Kondo
    Just apologize.
[10:41] Gin
    Uh, an apology isn't going to help!
[10:44] Enari
    You want me to forgive you?
[10:46] Gin
    I-I'm sorry! Please forgive me!
[10:49] Gin
    I didn't mean any harm!
[10:51] Pinko
    Then recite the Heart
    Sutra one hundred times!
[10:56] Gin
    No!
[10:58] Gin
    Why is my Love Choris so different?!
[11:00] Gin
    This isn't a dating sim!
    This is Resident Evil!
[11:04] Gin
    Her son died.
[11:06] Gin
    You should wait until she's
    gotten over the loss.
[11:09] Gin
    Uh, doesn't this game move in real time?!
[11:11] Gin
    I can't wait two years!
[11:13] Kondo
    Well, in any case,
[11:15] Kondo
    keep working on winning
    the heart of Pinko-chan.
[11:18] Kondo
    Do your best to turn her
    into your ideal girlfriend.
[11:21] Gin
    Isn't this enough already?
[11:22] Gin
    I should be able to communicate
    with Shinpachi now.
[11:28] Kondo
    You really think that this
    will be enough to save
[11:30] Kondo
    Shinpachi-kun from the world of Love Choris?
SIGN    Love Choris The My Wife World Tournament
[11:35] Kondo
    You should enter this tournament!
[11:37] Gin
    Th-This is...
[11:39] Gin
    The My Wife World Tournament?
[11:42] Kondo
    Love Choris players from all over the country
[11:45] Kondo
    will gather to determine
    whose girlfriend is the best!
[11:48] Kondo
    You must defeat Shinpachi-kun
    in this tournament.
[11:50] Kondo
    That is the only way to bring him
[11:52] Kondo
    out of his dream and back to the real world.
[11:55] Kondo
    You must shatter his fantasy...
[11:59] Kondo
    ...by using your own fantasy!
SIGN    Odd Jobs Gin-chan
[12:05] Pinko
    Wake up!
[12:06] Pinko
    It's morning!
[12:08] Pinko
    How long are you going to sleep?
[12:11] Gin
    Why are you so loud every morning?
[12:14] Gin
    I get to decide when I'm going to wake up.
[12:17] Pinko
    It must be nice to wake up
    and go to sleep every day.
[12:23] Pinko
    But my son...
[12:25] Pinko
    ...will never wake up again!
[12:28] Gin
    No more! I've had enough!
[12:33] Kondo
    Listen to me.
[12:34] Kondo
    You must keep Love Choris
    by your side at all times,
[12:36] Kondo
    including when you're eating and sleeping.
[12:38] Kondo
    This will help strengthen your bond.
[12:40] Gin
    I did what he said.
[12:41] Gin
    It's already the day of the tournament,
[12:43] Gin
    but there hasn't been any improvement.
[12:45] Gin
    Enari is decomposing in real time!
[12:48] Gin
    And this woman is cursing me 24/7.
[12:48] Pinko
    I wish you would suffer
    the same fate as my son.
[12:51] Gin
    How is this a dating sim?!
[12:54] Gin
    No more!
[12:56] Gin
    Kagura's starting to look at me with disgust.
[12:58] Gin
    Screw Shinpachi and this tournament!
[13:01] Pinko
    I feel the same way.
[13:04] Pinko
    Why would I fall in love with the man
[13:06] Pinko
    who killed my son?
[13:09] Pinko
    Honestly, this isn't funny.
SIGN    Odd Jobs Gin-chan
[13:21] Kagura
    Gin-chan, Shinpachi wanted
    to take the day off.
[13:24] Gin
    Oh, really.
[13:25] Kagura
    What's going on, anyway?
[13:27] Kagura
    Aren't you also playing that dating sim, Gin-chan?
[13:30] Gin
    Uh huh.
[13:31] Kagura
    Is it really that good?
[13:33] Gin
    Well, I'm a grown-up now,
[13:36] Gin
    so I can't really say.
[13:37] Kagura
    Yeah, it's like not like they're jumping
    out of the screen or anything.
[13:41] Kagura
    I don't get it.
[13:43] Gin
    Yeah...
[13:44] Gin
    I don't get it either.
[13:47] Kagura
    This is why men are called herbivores and
[13:50] Kagura
    considered weaker than women now.
[13:53] Gin
    I know. Me and my sweet
    tooth don't get it either.
[13:59] Kagura
    Sadaharu, pipe down.
[14:02] Kagura
    This is how he acts when
    there are strangers here.
[14:06] Kagura
    Stop that, Sadaharu!
[14:08] Kagura
    Gin-chan, Sadaharu won't stop barking.
[14:11] Kagura
    Ah, Gin-chan!
[14:17] Gin
    What the hell...
[14:18] Gin
    What the hell is going on?!
[14:20] Gin
    Everywhere I go! Everywhere I go!
[14:22] Gin
    Pinko and Enari are there!
[14:26] Gin
    It's like I'm really Making
    It Through with Pinko!
[14:30] Gin
    Damn, what's wrong with me?
[14:33] Kondo
    Hey, Odd Jobs!
[14:35] Gin
    Gorilla!
[14:36] Kondo
    What are you doing here?
[14:37] Kondo
    The tournament is today.
[14:38] Kondo
    Want a ride?
[14:40] Gin
    S-Sorry, I appreciate this.
[14:43] Kondo
    What's wrong? Why are you so flustered?
[14:45] Gin
    Well, there's something
    crazy chasing me around.
[14:48] Kondo
    Something crazy?
[14:49] Sayaka
    Oh, no! I'm so scared, Isao-kun!
[14:51] Kondo
    Everything's okay, Sayaka-chan.
[14:53] Gin
    Hey! What is this?!
[14:55] Gin
    Hey!
[14:56] Gin
    Why is your girlfriend out
    in the real world, too?!
[14:59] Kondo
    It appears that you can finally see them.
[15:02] Gin
    I can finally see them?!
[15:03] Gin
    Don't tell me that...
[15:04] Kondo
    Of course, I can see Sayaka-chan.
[15:07] Kondo
    And I can also see your
    girlfriend, Pinko-chan.
[15:11] Kondo
    I knew you could make it to this stage.
[15:15] Kondo
    Other people may think that
    we're just playing a game,
[15:17] Sayaka
    I love you, Isao-kun!
[15:19] Kondo
    but this world where we can
[15:21] ---
    see the manifestations of our girlfriends...
[15:23] Kondo
    A world only accessible to those
    who have mastered Love Choris...
[15:26] Kondo
    The dimension between game and reality...
[15:29] Kondo
    Love Choris Hole!
[15:31] Gin
    We're just insane!
[15:32] Gin
    Love Choris Hole?!
[15:34] Gin
    All this means is that
    we've spent so much time
[15:36] Gin
    playing games that we're hallucinating!
[15:38] Kondo
    You're finally on the same
    level as Shinpachi-kun.
[15:42] Gin
    That's a bad thing!
[15:43] Gin
    This ain't funny!
[15:44] Gin
    This is no longer about saving Shinpachi!
[15:47] Gin
    Hey, let me out at the hospital!
[15:48] Kondo
    It's true that from the
    perspective of the real world,
[15:51] Kondo
    we have lost our minds.
[15:53] Kondo
    But where are we heading?
[15:56] Kondo
    Yes, to an otherworldly
    battlefield of warriors who are
[15:59] ---
    trapped in their fantasies.
SIGN    Love Choris
    The My Wife World Tournament
[16:01] Kondo
    There, fantasy becomes reality!
[16:05] Gin
    This is one creepy tournament!
[16:08] Gin
    They're all in the Love Choris
    Hole like nothing's wrong!
[16:10] Gin
    They've all been hit by a Dazzle spell!
[16:12] Kondo
    A person who hasn't reached the Love Choris Hole
[16:15] Kondo
    is like a Soul Reaper in the Soul
    Society who can't Bankai.
[16:18] Gin
    It's supposed to be cool?!
[16:20] Gin
    In the real world, these people
    would be considered total failures!
[16:22] Kondo
    These people have reached a high level.
[16:25] Kondo
    They have completed their ideal girlfriends.
[16:29] Kondo
    But your girlfriend is also standing out.
[16:33] Gin
    And not in a good way!
[16:35] Gin
    There's no way I can win!
[16:37] Enari
    That's not helping, okay?
[16:42] Gin
    Of course not.
[16:42] Gin
    Because you're dead.
[16:43] Gin
    Could you please shut up?
[16:45] Gin
    You're scaring me.
[16:45] Kondo
    However, she's gradually approaching
    your ideal girlfriend.
[16:50] Pinko
    Watch your back.
[16:52] Pinko
    I'm gonna avenge Enari.
[16:55] Gin
    You sure about that?
[16:56] Kondo
    I see. This would be that
    new yandere fad, right?
[17:00] Gin
    Hell no!
[17:01] Gin
    All I see is a psycho old lady
    and a decomposing Enari-kun!
[17:04] Gin
    Hey, I'll trade the decomposing
    Enari for your Sayaka-chan.
[17:08] Sayaka
    No, I like, want Isao-kun.
[17:10] Kondo
    I know, right?
[17:12] Gin
    Why is this bitch so cute?
[17:14] Gin
    Your boyfriend was a
    yandere in the real world!
[17:16] Gin
    Couldn't keep a lid on his load!
[17:19] Kondo
    Hey! Don't say that stuff to Sayaka-chan!
[17:22] A
    Hey, now. They're starting a fight.
[17:26] Kyubei
    Stop this.
[17:27] Kyubei
    This is not a place for being
    jealous of someone else's love.
[17:30] Kyubei
    It's a place to be proud of your own love.
[17:33] Gin
    You're...
[17:34] Kondo
    Is it...
[17:35] Gin
    Kyubei...
[17:36] Both
    Who the hell are you?!
[17:37] Gin
    It's Pinko!
[17:38] Gin
    A Pinko who's based off Kyubei!
[17:40] Tojo
    Lady!
[17:41] Kyubei
    Ayu-tan!
[17:44] Kyubei
    Where did you go?
[17:46] Tojo
    You're the one who let go of
    my hand, and then I got lost!
[17:55] Tojo
    Wh-Wh-Wha-
[17:56] Tojo
    What are you people doing here?!
[17:59] Gin
    Yeah, that's what I was about to ask.
[18:01] Gin
    And so...
[18:03] Gin
    Is that supposed to be Kyubei-kun?
[18:04] Tojo
    No way! Absolutely not!
[18:07] Gin
    Uh, it's Kyubei.
[18:08] Gin
    You obviously failed,
[18:09] Gin
    but you clearly based this
    sad monster off of Kyubei.
[18:13] Tojo
    You're wrong, I say!
[18:14] Tojo
    I do not have any improper
    feelings for the Lady!
[18:16] Kyubei
    Yeah!
[18:17] Kyubei
    I'm not Ayu-tan's girlfriend.
[18:19] Kyubei
    I'm Ayu-tan's mama.
[18:21] Gin
    Oh, really...
[18:22] Tojo
    Hey! Stop talking!
[18:24] Gin
    Usually, you're the one looking after Kyubei,
[18:26] Gin
    but you actually wanted her to baby you.
[18:28] Tojo
    You're wrong!
[18:31] Tojo
    I was playing the game, and
    this just kind of happened.
[18:31] Kyubei
    Okay, time to change your diapers.
[18:34] Gin
    What kind of playing are
    we taking about here?
[18:36] Gin
    This tournament is messed up.
[18:38] Gin
    People's fetishes are on display.
[18:40] Gin
    And what do other people think about me?
[18:44] Gin
    Hey, let's trade girlfriends.
[18:47] Sayaka
    No, I, like, want Isao-kun.
[18:50] Kondo
    I know, right?
[18:51] Gin
    Cut that out, stupid girl!
[18:52] Gin
    That little act isn't cute!
[18:54] Gin
    Do it again.
[18:55] Gin
    Say, I, like, want Gintoki-kun.
[18:58] Pinko
    I promise to, like, avenge Enari.
[19:01] Gin
    I wasn't talking to you!
[19:02] Enari
    That's not, like, helping, okay?
[19:05] Gin
    I wasn't talking to you either!
[19:06] Gin
    If you don't stop, I'm gonna beat you down!
[19:08] Kondo
    Hey, Odd Jobs!
[19:10] Kondo
    Was there a heroine like that in this game?
[19:12] Gin
    Huh? Isn't that Sa-chan?
[19:15] Kondo
    Looks like her.
[19:17] Kondo
    Did someone want her as a girlfriend?
[19:19] Gin
    No, nobody would like that sick girl.
[19:22] Kondo
    But look, there's her boyfriend.
[19:24] Sa
    Where did you go, Pin-san?
[19:26] Sa
    Geez, you're not supposed to leave my side.
[19:31] Gin
    Who the hell is this Pin-san?!
[19:33] Gin
    Why did you turn Pinko into this?!
[19:35] Gin
    Isn't this a tournament for
    showing off girlfriends!
[19:37] Sa
    Hmm? I have no idea what
    you're talking about.
[19:41] Sa
    I'm the ideal girlfriend from Pin-san's game.
[19:45] Sa
    I don't know anything else.
[19:47] Gin
    What's this game called?
[19:48] Gin
    How to make annoying girls?
[19:50] Gin
    AKA Annoying Girl?
[19:51] Sa
    Could you stop that?
[19:53] Sa
    My boyfriend is Pin-san.
[19:55] Sa
    It's too late for you to be jealous.
[19:58] Sa
    It's your turn to suffer the way I did
[20:00] Sa
    when the one I loved had
    been stolen by Pinko!
[20:05] Gin
    Why is she here?
[20:06] Gin
    She's creating fantasy on top of fantasy.
[20:09] Sa
    Let's see if your Pinko or my Pinko wins.
[20:13] Sa
    Sit tighty-whitey!
[20:15] Gin
    Wait, that's not what
    this tournament is about!
[20:17] Gin
    What's wrong here?
[20:18] Gin
    Only freaks are using Pinko!
[20:20] Gin
    Let's trade girlfriends.
[20:22] Sayaka
    No!
[20:22] Sayaka
    I, like, want Isao-kun.
[20:24] Kondo
    I know, right?
[20:25] Kondo
    Just suck it up and win with your Pinko-chan.
[20:29] Kondo
    Sayaka-chan will always be mine.
[20:31] Kondo
    Even after death.
[20:33] Okita
    Oh, there you are.
[20:34] Okita
    Finally found you.
[20:36] Kondo
    Sogo, why are you here?
[20:38] Okita
    Huh? Kondo-san and the chief.
[20:41] Kondo
    Are you also participating
    in this tournament?
[20:43] Okita
    Huh? So are you?
[20:45] Kondo
    Of course.
[20:46] Kondo
    Don't you see my Sayaka-chan here?
[20:49] Sayaka
    Welcome back, master.
[20:52] Okita
    How did it feel to serve
    a man you can't stand?
[20:56] Sayaka
    It was very painful.
[20:58] Sayaka
    But when I realized that I was
    being my master's loyal slave,
[21:02] Sayaka
    I began to feel happy deep down.
[21:05] Okita
    Heh, bitch.
[21:08] Sayaka
    Please don't send me away again, master.
[21:12] Okita
    Well, we'll see.
[21:15] Kondo
    Sakata-kun.
[21:16] Gin
    I'm not gonna trade girlfriends with you.
[21:19] Kondo
    Please!
[21:20] Kondo
    Can you at least give me Enari-kun?!
[21:22] Enari
    No.
[21:23] Kondo
    What happened to your catchphrase?!
[21:25] B
    Wh-Who is that?!
[21:28] B
    Why is it so bright?!
[21:33] A
    I-It's a goddess!
[21:36] B
    Who is her boyfriend?!
[21:38] B
    How was he able to raise that girlfriend?!
[21:42] Gin
    Sh-Shinpachi?!
[21:44] N
    The day has come!
[21:47] N
    We will choose the best of the best from the
[21:51] N
    ideal girlfriends everyone has
    painstakingly raised!
[21:53] N
    The Love Choris My Wife
    World Tournament begins now!
[22:00] Gin
    Can my puny fantasy defeat his massive one?!
SIGN    To be continued.
SIGN    Next Episode: Making It Through Love
[23:41] Gin
    Next time:
[23:42] Gin
    Making It Through Love.
SIGN    The My Wife World Tournament finally begins. Who feels the greatest love for his girlfriend?
SIGN    Gintoki is faced by difficult opponents in a battle of fantasies. Will he be able to wake up Shinpachi?!
[3:05:07] ---
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