E242 - Girls like Vegeta, guys like Piccolo
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:30] Madam
I'll be back next week at the same time.
[01:35] Toshi
Here we go!
[01:37] Toshi
Let's party!
[01:39] All
Okay!
[01:41] All
Ooh! It's been so long, Kyoshiro-sama!
[01:45] Kyo
H-Help...
[01:48] Shin
And the Madame is about to come!
[01:51] Shin
We haven't even started,
[01:53] Shin
and Kyoshiro-san has already been
hunted down by the monsters!
[01:56] Kyo
Help!
SIGN Girls Like Vegeta, Guys Like Piccolo
[02:02] Shin
Kyoshiro-san has been hunted
down by the monsters!
[02:05] Shin
Why did this have to happen now?
[02:07] Kagura
Don't worry.
[02:08] Kagura
He's the number one host.
[02:10] Kagura
He can handle that lot with
one arm behind his back.
[02:13] Kagura
Look. It's the "I'll be back" hand.
[02:15] Shin
Uh, as far as we know, that hand
is the only thing left of him!
[02:19] Shin
We need to get him out of there
[02:20] ---
and ask the monsters to go back to their den!
[02:23] Gin
Damn. Unfortunately we're only the help for the help.
[02:26] Gin
TOSHI, are you ready?
[02:28] Toshi
Don't give me that crap!
[02:30] Toshi
How are we supposed to "Let's
party!" with those piranhas!
[02:33] Shin
Then we'll have to save him together!
[02:36] Gin
Screw that!
[02:37] Gin
All the money in the world wouldn't
[02:38] ---
be enough to get me to deal with them!
[02:40] Shin
Son of a bitch!
[02:43] Tsu
Wait, I just dropped by to visit.
[02:45] Tsu
Where do you think you're going?
[02:47] Tsu
GIN-sama?
[02:50] Tsu
The night is still young!
[02:53] Tsu
Bring me more booze, you stinkin' host!
[02:59] Shin
Th-The monster of Yoshiwara is here!
[03:02] A
B-Boss, you're drinking too much!
[03:05] Tsu
Shut up! I said to relax today!
[03:08] Tsu
Don't call me Boss. It's Tsu-ki.
[03:10] Otae
Welcome.
[03:11] Tsu
Yeah, you wanted a crowd, so I
brought everyone I could find.
[03:16] Tsu
We really get to drink all we want?
[03:18] Otae
Yes, normally you have to serve men,
[03:21] Otae
but this is like a Yoshiwara for women.
[03:23] Otae
Time for some payback.
[03:24] Shin
Again, nobody gave you
permission to do this, Sis!
[03:25] Tsu
Okay. Let's do this, girls.
[03:26] Shin
And why is Tsukuyo-san already drunk?
[03:29] A
I-I'm sorry. Boss...
[03:31] ---
Tsu-ki has never been to a host club
[03:33] ---
before so she's a little nervous.
[03:35] Tsu
Hey, bring some girls!
[03:37] Tsu
And music!
[03:38] Tsu
Play "Beer Tears Man Woman!"
[03:40] Shin
In what way is she nervous?!
[03:42] Shin
She sounds like a regular customer!
[03:45] Gin
G-Got it.
[03:46] Gin
I'll go find you some girls...
[03:48] Toshi
Hey! He's trying to run away again!
[03:57] Gin
Oh, a girl.
[04:05] Shin
Kyu-Kyubei-san's here too?!
[04:07] Otae
Oh, Kyu-chan. You came.
[04:10] Kyu
Sorry about being late.
[04:12] Kyu
You said that I could only bring girls,
[04:17] Kyu
so it took a while to get ready.
[04:18] Shin
Why are the Yagyu retainers
dressed like women?!
[04:21] Tojo
Oh, gosh. If it isn't Tsu-ki?
[04:24] Tojo
Just finish a long day in Yoshiwara?
[04:25] Tojo
Same here.
[04:26] Shin
And this guy's on his own level of wrong!
[04:29] Tsu
Hey! I never asked for any ugly girls!
[04:33] Tojo
What? That's so mean, Tsu-ki!
[04:34] Tojo
We both work in the same line of business.
[04:37] Shin
Uh, excuse me!
[04:38] Shin
This isn't like Yoshiwara,
so we don't provide girls...
[04:42] Tsu
What? I heard that this
is a Yoshiwara for women.
[04:45] Shin
Well, that's not entirely accurate.
[04:46] Tsu
What's that then?
SIGN Master Roshi Bondage
[04:48] Okita
The B Course is horse riding.
SIGN Trojan Horse Riding
[04:50] Okita
The C Course involves candles.
SIGN Candle Wax Play
[04:52] Okita
And the D Course involves neglect.
[04:54] Sa
Which should I choose?
[04:58] Sa
But I can't see.
[04:59] Sa
And isn't GIN-sama here yet?!
[05:01] Sa
I'm always after the G Course!
[05:03] Okita
Ma'am, I'm going to pin
your nose back with hooks
[05:06] Okita
and stick photos of it all over town.
[05:08] Sa
You know your stuff. What's your name?
[05:11] Both
Sick and twisted!
[05:13] Sa
Oh! That sounds like something
GIN-sama would say!
[05:15] Sa
I've been waiting for you!
[05:17] Toshi
Hey, toss them out with the trash.
[05:19] Sa
This is such an excellent bar!
[05:21] Sa
I'm very impressed!
[05:22] A
Hey! Where's my order?!
[05:24] B
Hello? Over here!
[05:27] Shin
We'll never be able to handle all
of these customers, Hijikata-san!
[05:29] Shin
More idiots keep showing up!
[05:31] Toshi
Hey, this is looking bad!
[05:32] Toshi
The place is practically full!
[05:34] Toshi
We're in over our heads!
[05:36] Shin
And now the trannies are starting a fight!
[05:38] Tojo
Eh? Who's your doctor?
[05:40] Ago
What? It's Takasu, fool.
[05:42] Tojo
Bastard, my senpai gets his from Takasu, too!
[05:46] Shin
They sound like a couple of addicts
bragging about their source!
[05:48] Shin
This is not good!
[05:49] Shin
We need to stop them!
[05:50] Toshi
What are you doing?!
[05:52] Toshi
Help us clear out some customers!
[05:53] Kagura
Shut up! That's what we're doing!
[05:57] Both
Sorry about the wait!
[06:01] Both
This is our special, Fish on Host!
[06:08] Shin
They made it worse!
[06:10] Toshi
Stop them! Do something!
[06:13] Shin
Do what?!
[06:14] Shin
I know! Kyoshiro-san!
[06:16] Shin
Kyoshiro-san!
[06:19] Shin
It's over!
[06:20] Shin
Forget about the Madame!
[06:22] Toshi
Damn it! What do we do...
[06:24] Saigo
Quiet down!
[06:30] Saigo
Don't you understand that you're
making trouble for the bar?
[06:33] Saigo
You're supposed to control
yourself when you have fun.
[06:37] Tsu
I've had enough.
[06:38] Kyu
The party is over.
[06:40] Saigo
I apologize for the trouble we caused.
[06:47] Shin
They instantly put an end to the riot.
[06:49] Shin
They're the real monsters.
[06:50] Toshi
In any case, we're back to normal.
[06:54] Saigo
Now that it's quiet, let's
get back to drinking.
[06:58] All
Cheers!
[07:01] Both
You're staying?!
[07:04] Gin
P-Perfect, this is my chance to escape.
[07:07] Madame
Excuse me.
[07:10] Madame
I have an appointment tonight.
[07:13] Madame
My name is Yagami.
[07:29] Gin
Yagami?
[07:30] Gin
Could it be?
[07:32] Gin
Could it be?
[07:34] Madame
Could you go tell Kyoshiro-san that
[07:37] ---
the Madame has come to see him?
[07:40] Gin
The Madame is here!
[07:42] Gin
A-At the worst possible time...
[07:45] Tsu
Booze! More booze!
[07:45] Gin
The monsters are still partying!
[07:48] Gin
I need to run away before I get caught up
[07:49] ---
in this disaster waiting to happen!
[07:51] Gin
S-So sorry...
[07:54] Gin
The boss is out right now.
[07:57] Gin
I-I'll go get him!
[07:59] Toshi
Don't worry, GIN.
[08:01] Toshi
I already contacted the boss.
[08:03] Shin
Please have something to
drink while you're waiting.
[08:06] Shin
Follow me.
[08:06] Gin
Y-You bastards!
[08:08] Toshi
You thought you could run away
after dragging us into this mess?
[08:12] Shin
All of us have to work together
to entertain the Madame.
[08:16] Gin
What? Don't be stupid!
[08:20] Gin
Where's everybody else?
[08:22] Gin
When is the boss coming back?
[08:24] Gin
They're all out of action!
[08:26] Gin
Do you have any idea what will happen if we
[08:28] ---
let the Madame join those drunken masters?
[08:30] Gin
It'd be like throwing a chair
into a bunch of Jackie Chans!
[08:33] Gin
She'll be used for acrobatic moves, abused,
[08:36] ---
then smashed against an enemy's head!
[08:37] Shin
I-It'll be okay!
[08:38] Shin
Please follow me.
[08:39] Shin
Kyoshiro-san will come back!
[08:41] Shin
Until then, we'll have
to entertain the Madame!
[08:45] Shin
Y-Your table is right over there.
[08:52] Tsu
Oh, GIN-sama. Where do you
think you're going without us?
[08:57] Tsu
I asked for you first!
[09:00] Tsu
Get your ass over here and pour me booze!
[09:02] Sa
Yeah!
[09:03] Sa
We're customers today, so
you should treat us better!
[09:06] Shin
We were too easy to spot!
[09:07] Shin
Like Jackie Chan's nose!
[09:09] Gin
S-Sorry, baby.
[09:12] Gin
I need to help this lady for a little bit.
[09:15] Gin
GURA and TAE will take good care of you.
[09:19] Tsu
What's that?! You're too
good to drink with me?!
[09:22] Shin
Now she's going Jackie Chan on us!
[09:23] Sa
You got balls to steal our men!
[09:26] Shin
Wait! Don't do anything to the Madame!
[09:28] Sa
Did you come here by yourself to pick up men?
[09:31] Sa
You're a real piece of work! Right, Tsu-ki?
[09:34] Shin
You're no better!
[09:36] Tsu
Wait, you got poop on your hair.
[09:38] Tsu
Is everything okay?
[09:41] Shin
Hey! Somebody stop these drunks!
[09:44] Kyu
Would you two stop that?
[09:47] Kyu
Excuse us.
[09:49] Kyu
I'll pay for the cleaning,
[09:50] ---
but for now, let's use this to wipe that off.
[09:53] Shin
You're drunk, too?!
[09:54] Kyu
Oh, it's bigger than I thought...
[09:57] Kyu
The fancy toilet paper from the
Yagyu household can't handle it.
[10:00] Shin
Uh, you're wiping her face! Stop it!
[10:03] Otae
Oh, Kyu-chan! You shouldn't do that!
[10:06] Otae
Let the employees handle this.
[10:10] Otae
If it won't come off, you wet the paper,
[10:13] Otae
and scrub hard.
[10:14] Shin
Hey!
[10:14] Shin
Even our employees are piss drunk!
[10:17] Otae
Oh, it won't come off.
[10:18] Kagura
It wasn't wet enough.
[10:19] Kagura
Give it to me, boss lady.
SIGN Takamagahara
[10:29] Kagura
I had too much Koronamin C.
[10:32] Otae
That's why kids are only
supposed to have one a day.
[10:35] Saigo
I see that my friends inconvenienced you.
[10:37] Saigo
It's on me, so drink away.
[10:43] Both
After all that rude behavior,
[10:46] ---
it's turned into a Jackie Chan carnival?!
[10:49] Toshi
What are we going to do?!
[10:50] Toshi
We won't be able to look after the Madame!
[10:53] Toshi
She's already about to snap!
[10:55] Gin
I can't blame her, considering
the abuse she's had to endure!
[10:59] Shin
If anything else goes wrong,
we'll be in big trouble!
[11:04] Shin
Anyway, let's try to
improve the Madame's mood!
[11:07] Gin
Uh, Yagami-san? What are you drinking there?
[11:11] Madame
Oolong Highball.
[11:12] Gin
Oh, that's good. I love those.
[11:15] Gin
It doesn't leave much of an
aftertaste. Right, TOSHI?
[11:19] Toshi
Huh? Yeah, I'm pretty
high on that Oolong pig.
[11:22] Toshi
Hell, Yamcha's little buddy is my
favorite character in Dragonball...
[11:30] Otae
That's Puar!
[11:36] Gin
Yeah. Right. That's Puar!
[11:39] Gin
Oh, speaking of Dragonball, Yagami-san.
[11:41] Gin
Who's your favorite character?
[11:43] Gin
Let me guess.
[11:44] Gin
I'm pretty good at Dragonball
character fortune telling.
[11:48] Gin
Let's see, you're a Tien...
[11:50] Gin
No, you might actually be a Vegeta.
[11:53] Tsu
The king of King Castle!
[11:58] Gin
Right. You have unique taste.
The king of King Castle.
[12:03] Toshi
That's a rare choice.
[12:05] Toshi
So Yagami-san, are you a...
[12:08] Sa
It's King Furry!
[12:12] Gin
Yeah, that guy looked like a dog.
[12:14] Gin
Come to think of it, there were
a bunch of animal characters
[12:16] Gin
in the beginning, but it
turned into a humanoid
[12:18] ---
fest like a certain other manga...
[12:21] Kyu
Put yourself in Toriyama's shoes!
[12:25] Toshi
Yeah, Toriyama had a lot to...
[12:29] Kagura
Pororoca!
[12:33] Gin
Uh, hold on.
[12:34] Gin
Is it me or were those girls
beating us up for the hell of it?
[12:38] Toshi
That last one had nothing
to do with Dragonball.
[12:40] Toshi
Her timing would have been
perfect for a quiz show.
[12:42] Toshi
And I've been hit an extra time...
[12:45] Saigo
Sorry!
[12:46] Saigo
The correct answer was the Candiru,
[12:49] Saigo
the carnivorous catfish that
lives in the Amazon region!
[12:54] Toshi
Hey! What's wrong with those drunks?!
[12:56] Toshi
Do they have to smack us in the
head every time they talk?!
[12:59] Toshi
They aren't giving us a chance
to talk to the Madame!
[13:01] Gin
And why are we talking about
Dragonball with a woman?
[13:05] Toshi
I was trying to help you recover
from that Oolong tea crap!
[13:08] Toshi
What the hell is Dragonball fortune telling?!
[13:10] Toshi
You could have just asked what her type was!
[13:13] Tsu
King of King Castle!
[13:14] Sa
Colonel Silver!
[13:15] Otae
Bardock!
[13:16] Kyu
The female in Bardock's crew!
[13:17] Saigo
The joke with a power level of
five that's beaten up by Raditz!
[13:19] Kagura
Pororoca!
[13:20] Madame
Vegeta.
[13:25] Gin
Hey, we used Dragonball to get them
to tell us what their type is!
[13:28] Gin
And they all have weird taste!
[13:30] Toshi
One of them keeps saying Pororoca!
[13:32] Shin
Wasn't there an extra answer?
[13:39] All
She answered!
[13:42] Gin
Hey! The Madame is actually participating!
[13:44] Toshi
Which one?! Which one did she like?!
[13:46] Shin
I-It was probably Vegeta!
[13:48] Saigo
Oh, you like Vegeta?
[13:51] Saigo
A lot of women like Vegeta.
[13:54] Sa
It's the whole falling for the bad boy
[13:56] ---
after seeing him help a
puppy out of the rain.
[13:59] Shin
Wait! The girls are starting
a discussion about Vegeta!
[14:03] Sa
A lot of stupid women
fall for those bad boys.
[14:06] Sa
In most cases, they get knocked up, married,
[14:09] ---
and divorced in one breath.
[14:11] Otae
That relationship only worked
because Bulma was rich.
[14:14] Otae
Being a Super Saiyan doesn't mean
much if you don't have a job.
[14:18] Otae
And you can't say that he's gentle inside
[14:20] Otae
when he only ever cried because
of his pride as a Saiyan
[14:22] Otae
or because he was scared of Frieza.
[14:24] Otae
That man only cares about himself.
[14:27] All
Yeah, yeah.
[14:28] Shin
Vegeta is getting beat down!
[14:30] Shin
This is worse than when he got
his ass handed to him by Frieza!
[14:33] Kyu
As far as loners go, Piccolo is much better.
[14:37] Kyu
He cried before Gohan, and
he takes good care of kids.
[14:41] Tsu
But those shoulder pads would get in the way.
[14:43] Tsu
You can't latch onto his arm.
[14:45] Kyu
Vegeta has the same problem!
[14:46] Tsu
Vegeta wore normal clothes sometimes,
though they looked terrible.
[14:49] Shin
Stop it! You're making the Madame,
the Vegeta fan, look bad!
[14:52] Kagura
With that widow's peak, it
wouldn't matter what he wore.
[14:56] Kagura
He probably just threw on
whatever Bulma bought for him.
[14:59] All
Oh.
[15:01] Kagura
But I'm guessing he bought
the shirt that said BADMAN.
[15:06] All
Yeah, out of the question.
[15:08] All
Vegeta's out of the question.
[15:10] Shin
Stop!
[15:11] Shin
And how much time have you
people spent on Dragonball?!
[15:15] Gin
But Bulma looked happier
when she was with him,
[15:18] Gin
compared to when she was with Yamcha.
[15:21] Gin
Once Trunks was born, he settled down
[15:23] ---
and became a good father.
[15:25] Shin
He forced his way into the conversation!
[15:26] Shin
He dove right in, like a widow's peak!
[15:29] Gin
Oh, Yagami-san. Your glass is empty.
[15:31] Gin
Another Oolong Highball?
[15:32] Madame
Yes.
[15:33] Gin
Hey, TOSHI!
[15:35] Gin
Bring a Oolong Highball!
[15:39] Shin
Why are you recreating one
of Vegeta's famous scenes?!
[15:41] Shin
That's the famous farewell with Trunks!
[15:46] Otae
Imo shochu!
[15:47] Sa
Cassis Orange!
[15:48] Tsu
Japanese sake!
[15:49] Kyu
With soda!
[15:49] Saigo
Whiskey!
[15:50] Kagura
Pororoca!
[15:51] Shin
The famous scene had no effect!
[15:53] Shin
Vegeta can't do anything in this world!
[15:58] Madame
Heh, dirty fireworks.
[16:00] Shin
She joined in!
[16:02] Shin
The Madame is playing Vegeta!
[16:04] Shin
She's a pretty fun person!
[16:05] Shin
Hang in there!
[16:07] Shin
The Madame's heart is slowly opening!
[16:10] Toshi
But those drunks are still a problem.
[16:13] Toshi
We need to deal with them before
[16:15] ---
we can get anywhere with
the Madame, Kakarot...
[16:18] Shin
Uh, who are you calling Kakarot?
[16:21] Okita
Oh, ladies?
[16:24] Okita
What is this party for?
[16:26] Okita
A little get-together for models?
[16:29] Shin
S-SOUGO-san!
[16:31] Saigo
Please! You're such a sweet talker!
[16:35] Otae
This is just a supermodel powwow!
[16:38] Okita
Oh, forgive me.
[16:40] Okita
You're all so beautiful that I got confused.
[16:44] Toshi
H-He sidestepped them?
[16:47] Okita
Hey, what are you guys doing?
[16:49] Okita
Bring the goods.
[16:51] Toshi
The goods?
[16:52] Okita
The champagne tower that's actually
[16:56] Okita
filled with tequila!
[16:58] Both
Tequila tower?!
[17:06] Shin
I see!
[17:08] Shin
He's going to subdue them
by getting them drunk!
[17:12] Okita
Are you ready?
[17:13] All
Let's party!
[17:16] Shin
SOUGO-san...
[17:18] Shin
He's so evil that he doesn't
give a damn about abusing women.
[17:21] Shin
He's a prodigy host!
[17:31] Shin
You guys were the ones subdued?!
[17:33] Saigo
I've never had Dom Perignon before,
[17:36] Saigo
but it's almost like drinking water.
[17:38] Tsu
I need more booze! Bring the whole keg!
[17:41] Shin
The tequila isn't doing
anything to the women!
[17:43] Shin
They're too strong!
[17:45] Sa
Hey, Yagami-san! I know you want some more!
[17:47] Madame
No, I've had enough...
[17:50] Shin
Had enough?!
[17:52] Shin
How did she empty all of
those glasses so fast?!
[17:55] Madame
I've had quite a bit to drink,
so I will be leaving now.
[18:00] Shin
Er, hold on!
[18:03] Madame
I had a wonderful time tonight.
[18:06] Madame
Please let Kyoshiro-san know.
[18:08] Shin
Hold on! Why are you leaving?!
[18:11] Shin
Aren't you...
[18:13] Madame
I would not dare to see Kyoshiro-san
when my face is so flushed.
[18:19] Shin
You don't want to see him?
[18:22] Shin
So you didn't come back because
you didn't like the bar?
[18:29] Shin
You came to see Kyoshiro-san?
[18:31] Madame
So you have heard the stories.
[18:36] Madame
Unfortunately, I am no goddess of fortune,
[18:42] Madame
nor am I a goddess of death.
[18:48] Madame
Nor do I have the ability
to ruin an entire town.
[18:51] Madame
My obsession with the power of money left me
[18:54] ---
with no friends, no home.
[18:57] Madame
I never visited a bar twice
[19:00] Madame
because I didn't want people
tiptoeing around me.
[19:04] Madame
But at some point, I became famous around Edo
[19:07] Madame
and lost my only refuge.
[19:11] Madame
That was when I met Kyoshiro-sama.
[19:15] Madame
His smile was different
[19:17] ---
from the false ones that always greeted me.
[19:20] Madame
His smile was for everyone, not just me.
[19:25] Madame
I assume that was because
he loved his job as a host.
[19:32] Madame
His smile was very special to me.
[19:36] Madame
I returned to see that smile again.
[19:40] Madame
You must have come to
replace the hosts who quit.
[19:46] Madame
I truly apologize.
[19:50] Madame
Do not worry.
[19:51] Madame
The goddess of death
[19:53] ---
will never walk the night streets again.
[19:57] Madame
But it was very fun.
[20:00] Madame
I didn't get to see Kyoshiro-san,
[20:02] Madame
but I saw many smiles that
[20:04] ---
would turn away any goddess of death.
[20:17] Shin
Ya-Yagami-san...
[20:29] Kyoshiro
Ma'am, do you have any plans tonight?
[20:38] Kyoshiro
If not, why not drop by Takamagahara,
[20:42] ---
the refuge for angels, to rest your wings?
[20:47] Madame
I'm sorry to say that my wings are black,
[20:50] ---
as they only cause sorrow.
[20:53] Kyo
Oh, you sound like an angel of death.
[20:56] Kyo
However, I believe that particular
goddess has already left.
[21:02] Kyo
I've heard that Madame Yagami first appears
[21:06] ---
as a goddess of fortune,
[21:08] Kyo
then as a goddess of death
to bring misfortune.
[21:12] Kyo
Then what happens when
she visits a third time?
[21:25] Gin
Hey, we've been waiting for you.
[21:27] Gin
The drinks are on you this time.
[21:30] Hachi
Drinking buddies!
[21:31] Host
All lined up!
[21:35] Kyo
Welcome to Takamagahara.
[21:47] Madame
Heh, dirty fireworks.
SIGN Next Episode
[23:20] Gin
Jellybeans Vanguard Honda,
[23:23] Gin
is a Jump editor who's just
gotten married when a
[23:27] Gin
new promising manga artist
appears before him!
[23:30] Gin
Next time:
[23:30] Gin
Draw your life on the canvas we call manga.
SIGN Draw Your Life on the Canvas We Call Manga
SIGN Jellybeans Vanguard Honda has been assigned to Gintaman
SIGN To escape the despair which plagues him,
he must land the new artist a regular series!!
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