E117 - "Beauty is Like a Summer Fruit "

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] Kyubei
    Let's defeat Otohime.
[00:02] Kyubei
    Now that everyone on this
    planet has become old,
[00:05] Kyubei
    we're the only ones who can do it.
[00:13] Otohime
    But since you're not, I can toss
    you aside. I'm much cuter.
[00:19] Otae
    Huh?! Bring it on! Show your face!
[00:23] Otohime
    Huh?! You want to fight?!
    You think you can beat me?!
[00:27] Kamenashi
    Otohime gave up her quest for
    eternal youth and beauty.
[00:30] Kamenashi
    And decided to use the box as revenge
[00:33] Kamenashi
    against those who had what
    she no longer did.
[00:36] ---
    In other words,
[00:37] ---
    she planned to turn all the people
    of Earth into old geezers.
[00:40] Kamenashi Otohime
    You're just a young brat, that's all!
[00:43] Kamenashi Otohime
    If I was younger... If only
    I was younger...
[00:47] Otae
    Your age isn't your only problem, tramp!
SIGN    [Gintoki and the others split into three teams... And head for the palace!!]
SIGN    [Shinpachi's fighting power is 362 K. What's a K unit?!]
SIGN    ["Beauty is Like A Summer Fruit"]
[02:40] Kamenashi
    Yes... Otohime won't let anyone
    be more beautiful than her.
[02:45] Kamenashi
    In order to insure that she's the most
    beautiful woman in the world...
[02:48] Kamenashi
    she plans to turn this world
    into a planet of the elderly.
[02:53] Shinpachi
    No way... That's such a selfish reason.
[02:56] Shinpachi
    She thinks she has the
    right to throw our world
[02:58] Shinpachi
    into chaos for a crappy reason like that?!
[03:00] ---
    She thinks people will let her take
    away their summer vacations?!
[03:04] Kamenashi
    History is always moved
    at the whim of its rulers.
[03:09] Kamenashi
    She's 3,000 years old. She's lived
    a very long time...too long.
[03:13] Kamenashi
    During all that time, she's lost
    so many important things.
[03:20] Kamenashi
    The only way to stop her is
    to put an end to her life.
[03:25] Shinpachi
    Isn't there any way to
    turn everyone back?
[03:28] ---
    What about Sis?
[03:29] Kamenashi
    All our answers are probably...
[03:31] Kamenashi
    in there...
[03:33] Kamenashi
    with Otohime...
[03:38] Kamenashi
    All right, let's split up into three teams.
[03:40] Kamenashi
    If we stay together and are discovered,
    we'll all be caught.
[03:45] Kamenashi
    If just one of us is caught, the rest
    of us can still get to Otohime.
[03:50] Kamenashi
    Even if in the end there's
    only one of us left.
[03:53] Shinpachi
    But can we split up into three groups
[03:55] Shinpachi
    and still take out Ryugu
    Palace's security?
[03:57] Kamenashi
    It'll be tough with our numbers.
[04:00] Kamenashi
    We can a least confuse and
    distract them by splitting up.
[04:03] Kamenashi
    Let's see if we can divide
    up our power evenly.
[04:05] Shinpachi
    What is that? I think I saw that in
    a another manga somewhere.
[04:09] Kamenashi
    It's a spouzer. It basically
    measures fighting ability.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of scouter from Dragon Ball.]
[04:13] Shinpachi
    No, that's a scouter, isn't it?
[04:14] Shinpachi
    It looks just like a scouter,
    don't you think?
[04:16] Kamenashi
    No, It's a spouzer. I won it in
    a festival night stall raffle.
[04:20] Shinpachi
    It's just a copy!!
[04:22] Kamenashi
    I'll use this to measure
    your fighting power
[04:24] Kamenashi
    and split everyone into three
    equal teams. First...
[04:27] Kamenashi
    You.
[04:31] Kamenashi
    362 K.
[04:33] Kamenashi
    Oh? That's pretty impressive
    for your age.
[04:36] Shinpachi
    What is a K?
[04:37] Shinpachi
    I don't know what you're basing
    that on. Is that impressive?
[04:40] Kamenashi
    It means you have the fighting
    power of 362 leaves of kelp.
SIGN    [K=Kelp]
[04:45] Shinpachi
    Why kelp?! A single leaf of kelp
    doesn't have any fighting power!
[04:49] Kamenashi
    Taking into consideration that a
    normal person is about 360 K,
[04:53] Kamenashi
    you're two leaves of kelp better
    than the average person.
[04:56] Shinpachi
    Just two leaves?!
[04:58] Shinpachi
    What exactly was my ten years
    of sword training for?!
[05:01] Hasegawa
    Hey, Kamenashi, can I have
    these sunglasses?
[05:04] Hasegawa
    I can't relax if I'm not
    wearing sunglasses.
[05:08] Kamenashi
    Your fighting power is 654 K.
[05:11] Shinpachi
    Why?! Why is Hasegawa-san
    higher than me?!
[05:15] Hasegawa
    You shouldn't judge others
    by how they look.
[05:18] Kamenashi
    Without his sunglasses, he's only 1 K.
[05:20] Hasegawa
    What?!
[05:21] Kagura
    Oh, Madao is really nothing more
    than just a pair of sunglasses.
[05:24] Kagura
    It's like his essence.
[05:25] Hasegawa
    That's weird!! 1K? That
    means I'm not human!!
[05:29] Hasegawa
    I'm just a single leaf of kelp!!
[05:31] Kamenashi
    You're next...
[05:33] Kamenashi
    Amazing. 7930 O.
[05:36] Shinpachi
    What's O mean? That's a different unit.
[05:38] Kamenashi
    The units change when I scan
    girls. It becomes cuter.
[05:42] Shinpachi
    Oh, does it stand for 7,930 flowers?
[05:46] Kamenashi
    7,930 boobs.
SIGN    [Note: "Boobs" in Japanese is "oppai."]
[05:48] Shinpachi
    That's not cute at all!! That's perverted!!
[05:50] Kyubei
    Are you trying to make fun of a
    warrior?! I don't need boobs.
[05:55] Kyubei
    Change it to 7,930 penises!!
[05:57] Shinpachi
    Stop!! That's even more disgusting!!
[06:00] Kagura
    Hey, how many boobs am I?
[06:04] Kamenashi
    No... Wait a second.
[06:06] Kamenashi
    8,000... 8,500... I can't believe
    it. It went up again... No, it's...
[06:13] Kamenashi
    It's dropping?! It's not 8,500 O!
[06:16] Kamenashi
    It's minus 8,500 O!! Unbelievable.
    What's the meaning of this?!
[06:20] Kamenashi
    What's this?! It's those two behind her?!
[06:23] Kamenashi
    Those two geezers equal a fighting
    power of... -15,000 ... NO, -30,000.
[06:27] Kamenashi
    I-It's still going down!
[06:32] Kamenashi
    It's simply immeasurable.
[06:34] Shinpachi
    -30,000? How much of
    a burden are they?!
[06:37] Shinpachi
    All of us together can't overcome that!!
[06:40] Kamenashi
    -30,000... Even the whole staff of a
    retirement home can't handle that.
[06:45] ---
    If I place one of them in each
    team, they're still -15,000.
[06:49] ---
    That's a big gap.
[06:51] Kamenashi
    Oh well. In order to raise their
    numbers as much as possible,
[06:54] Kamenashi
    I'll have each of them carry
    100 leaves of kelp.
[06:56] ---
    It's a mere consolation, but
    it's better than nothing.
[06:58] Shinpachi
    No, nothing is better!!
[06:59] Shinpachi
    Why does their power level increase
    when they're carrying kelp?!
[07:02] Kagura
    I'll hold 300 leaves! I'll
    cover Gin-chan's gap!!
[07:08] Kyubei
    That's...
[07:10] Kamenashi
    Oh no!! They found us!!
[07:12] Kamenashi
    They're going to fire.
[07:13] ---
    Everyone, scatter!!
[07:16] Kyubei
    We'll attack from this side!!
[07:17] Kagura
    Shinpachi and everyone
    else take a different route!!
[07:19] Shinpachi
    Hey, wait!!
[07:21] Shinpachi
    Weren't you going to split our fighting
    power into three even groups?!
[07:23] Shinpachi
    What was the point of the spouzer?!
[07:25] Shinpachi
    There's only trash here!!
[07:27] ---
    At least take one of the old men!
[07:31] ---
    Hey, don't ignore me! I know
    you can hear me, can't you?!
[07:35] Hasegawa
    They're coming after us!!
[07:36] Kamenashi
    Shinpachi-kun, leave this to us and run!!
[07:38] Shinpachi
    Run?! I'm stuck with these
    old geezers?! Why me?!
[07:43] Kamenashi
    I'll leave the future of Ryugu Palace...
[07:44] Kamenashi
    the future of the world
    to you young fellas.
[07:47] Shinpachi
    They're not young!!
[07:50] Kamenashi
    You're going to fight with me, huh?
[07:51] Kamenashi
    Sorry for sticking you with
    such a terrible job.
[07:53] Shinpachi
    I'm the one with the terrible job!!
[07:56] Hasegawa
    It doesn't matter. I discarded
    my life once before.
[07:59] Hasegawa
    Old soldiers like us should just pass on.
[08:01] Shinpachi
    The old soldiers are right over here!!
[08:04] Kamenashi
    Let's go!!
[08:05] Hasegawa
    We're taking all of you...
[08:06] Hasegawa
    with us to hell!!
[08:16] Shinpachi
    You guys were completely useless!
[08:22] Otohime
    Are you putting all your
    hope in those fools?
[08:26] Otohime
    They are this planet's last hope?
[08:28] Otohime
    I have nothing to worry about then.
[08:29] Otohime
    They'll meet your fate soon.
[08:32] Otohime
    Why don't you go meet
    them in the next world?
[08:37] Otohime
    This is your punishment
    for incurring my wrath.
[08:45] Otae
    If you want to kill me, then go ahead.
[08:48] Otae
    You kill people you don't like,
[08:50] Otae
    you turn people who are more beautiful
    than you into senior citizens.
[08:53] Otae
    You won't ever gain eternal
    beauty that way.
[08:58] Otae
    Even if you did gain eternal youth.
[09:02] Otae
    No matter how beautiful
    a kimono you wear...
[09:07] Otae
    I know without a doubt...
[09:10] Otae
    that you will always be ugly.
[09:14] Otae
    Your heart and soul
    are ugly and rotten.
[09:19] Otohime
    Watch your mouth, little girl!
    What do you know?!
[09:22] Otohime
    You're young and beautiful!
    What could you possibly know?!
[09:25] Otohime
    What do you know about the feelings
    of a woman who's been left to live
[09:29] Otohime
    and grow old by herself
    for thousands of years?
[09:31] ---
    What do you know about my feelings?
[09:33] ---
    About getting uglier and decaying
    all alone but never dying!
[09:38] Otae
    You're not the only one who ages.
[09:42] Otae
    Everyone, no matter how beautiful,
[09:44] Otae
    grows wrinkled and dies in the end.
[09:49] Otae
    But even if their looks change,
[09:52] Otae
    there's always some things
    that never change.
[09:55] ---
    Even if our bodies are destroyed.
    No matter how many years pass...
[09:59] Otae
    We believe there's something
    that can never be destroyed.
[10:04] Otae
    But even if we become wrinkled,
    we still won't lose to you.
[10:08] Otae
    That's because we know
    what true beauty is.
[10:17] Otohime
    Something that is truly beautiful
    cannot be destroyed, you say?
[10:21] Otohime
    How interesting.
[10:22] Otohime
    In that case...
[10:25] Otohime
    Show me...
[10:26] Otohime
    That beauty you speak of!!
[10:29] Otohime
    It's you or me... The winner is
    the one who's truly beautiful!!
[10:40] Kame Soldier J
    Where did they go?!
[10:41] Kame Soldier K
    Find them! They should be nearby!
[10:45] Shinpachi
    We managed to escape.
[10:47] Shinpachi
    Please, Gin-san, Katsura-san, run
    away on your own two feet.
[10:52] Shinpachi
    I don't care what happens
    to you geezers anymore.
[10:54] Old Katsura
    Honestly. Young people these days...
[10:57] Old Katsura
    Complaining about something
    like this? How pathetic.
[11:00] ---
    When we were young, we
    had to carry Master Roshi,
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Dragon Ball.]
[11:04] ---
    who had a turtle shell on his
    back, and deliver the milk...
[11:07] Shinpachi
    Who's Master Roshi?!
[11:09] Shinpachi
    Don't revise your memory to include
    parts from a mega-hit manga!
[11:13] Old Gintoki
    Hey, Zura ...
[11:19] Old Gintoki
    What was I going to say?
[11:20] Shinpachi
    You're taking too long to comment,
    and you even forgot what you were saying!
[11:22] Old Gintoki
    Oh yeah...In the end, you played
    with the Mega Drive, too.
[11:26] Shinpachi
    That was your comment
    from the last episode!!
[11:28] Shinpachi
    Why are you commenting on something
    that happened an episode ago?!
[11:30] Shinpachi
    No one will remember that!!
[11:31] Old Katsura
    As I expected of you, Gintoki.
[11:33] Old Katsura
    That's one of those surrealism comments
    that's so popular lately.
[11:35] Old Katsura
    A fine surreal comment.
    Young people just don't get it.
[11:39] Old Gintoki
    Zura, who is Master Roshi?
[11:43] Old Gintoki
    Don't go revising your memory to include
    parts from a mega-hit manga.
[11:46] Shinpachi
    Old fart!!
[11:47] Shinpachi
    If you don't cut it out, I'll dump you
    off in the mountains, damn it!!
[11:50] Shinpachi
    Crap. If we fight against Otohime
    like this, we're going to lose.
[11:55] Shinpachi
    What should I do?
[11:58] Shinpachi
    What's this?
[12:16] Otohime
    That's long enough. Pull her up.
[12:20] Otohime
    What a foolish woman.
[12:21] Otohime
    Does she think she can get
    away with defying me?
[12:25] Otohime
    I'm sure she's become
    quite beautiful now...
[12:28] Otohime
    A beautiful bloody corpse.
[12:34] Otohime
    I-Impossible! What?!
[13:05] Otohime
    Y...
[13:06] Otohime
    You fools! How did you get in here?!
[13:11] Otohime
    Th-The water!!
[13:13] Otohime
    I-Impossible!! You broke in by smashing
    the ceiling of the lower floor?!
[13:19] Otohime
    Get them, my guards!!
[13:23] Kame Soldier A
    Fire!!
[13:31] Kame Soldier B
    Tsk. She's so fast that
    we can't get near her!!
[13:37] Kagura
    Yahoo!
[13:38] Kame Soldier C
    Tsk! She's on top of the shark!!
[13:40] Kame Soldier D
    Shoot her and the shark down!!
[13:55] Otohime
    What are you fools doing?
[13:57] Otohime
    They're all rebels!! Hurry
    up and get rid of them!!
[14:00] Kame Soldier F
    Yes!!
[14:19] Otae
    I told you.
[14:21] Otae
    We won't lose no matter
    what happens to us.
[14:26] Otohime
    I-I won't accept that!!
[14:28] Otohime
    I'm the most beautiful
    woman in the world!!
[14:31] Otohime
    I'm going to win this battle!!
[14:34] ---
    I won't allow anyone to be...
[14:36] Otohime
    more beautiful that I am!!
[14:38] Otohime
    You're just a little girl who only has youth!!
[14:40] ---
    That face!!
[14:41] Otohime
    I'll make it ugly and swollen!!
[14:48] Otohime
    She's beautiful?! I-Impossible!
[14:51] Otohime
    Why is she so beautiful
    when I'm hitting her?
[14:53] Otohime
    It's like the ethereal beauty
    of a falling flower!!
[14:58] Otae
    You think your weak slaps
    can make me ugly?
[15:01] Otae
    Now it's my turn!!
[15:07] Otohime (Mono)
    What?! A punch?!
[15:10] Otohime (Mono)
    Who punches a woman's face?!
[15:16] Otohime (Mono)
    Furthermore, she's hitting places
    that'll definitely make me ugly.
[15:22] Otohime (Mono)
    What a formidable woman!!
[15:26] Otohime (Mono)
    And she's made all the flowers behind
    me scatter so gracefully.
[15:28] Otohime (Mono)
    I can't keep up with this.
[15:29] Otohime (Mono)
    I need to use my trump card!!
[15:33] Otohime (Mono)
    Take this!! Nose hooks!!
[15:36] Otohime (Mono)
    No one can escape such
    a devilish attack.
[15:39] Otohime (Mono)
    No matter how beautiful you are,
    you'll become the ugly one...
[15:46] Otohime (Mono)
    What?! She looks like Naoko?!
SIGN    [Note: Naoko Ken is a Japanese actress and singer.]
[15:49] Otohime (Mono)
    Compared to her, whose nose
    is even more upturned...
[15:52] ---
    this girl doesn't look ugly at all even when
    I've got her stuck in such a position!
[15:58] Otae
    Now it's my turn!!
[16:00] Otohime
    I won't let you!!
[16:01] ---
    In that case, I'll use...
[16:04] Otohime
    Shinji!!
SIGN    [Shinji Tanimura is a Japanese singer.]
[16:08] Otohime (Mono)
    Shinji?! Impossible!! She punched him out first?!
[16:14] Otae
    You lose, Otohime!
    Give up and let go of me!
[16:18] Otae
    Turn everyone... Turn the whole
    world back to normal!!
[16:21] Otae
    You already know that...
[16:22] Otae
    doing this won't change anything!!
[16:26] Otohime
    Shut up!!
[16:28] Otohime
    Who do you think I am?
[16:30] Otohime
    I am Otohime, the ruler of Ryugu!!
[16:33] Otohime
    I am the most beautiful
    creature in existence.
[16:36] ---
    I must be beautiful!
[16:43] Shinpachi
    What's this?
[16:46] Shinpachi
    It's a man...
[16:47] Shinpachi
    There's a man in there.
[16:50] Old Gintoki
    I wonder if it's a massage device.
[16:52] Old Gintoki
    I want to get one, too.
[16:53] Shinpachi
    What kind of massage device
    takes up this much space?!
[16:55] Shinpachi
    This is something else.
[16:57] Shinpachi
    It's probably a deep-freeze capsule,
    or something like that.
[17:00] Old Katsura
    Whatever the case, my back is worn out.
[17:04] Shinpachi
    Hey, wait!! Don't touch anything!!
[17:10] Shinpachi
    What's wrong?!
[17:10] Old Katsura
    It's a Tengu!! It's cursed!!
[17:14] Shinpachi
    What's this?
[17:15] ---
    Something's written here.
[17:18] Young Otohime
    Space century 079, July 15...
[17:23] Young Otohime
    He still hasn't awakened.
[17:26] Young Otohime
    According to the doctors, they've
    managed to keep him alive,
[17:31] Young Otohime
    but they don't know if he'll
    regain consciousness.
[17:34] Young Otohime
    It's all my fault.
[17:37] Young Otohime
    I kept him in this palace too long.
[17:40] Young Otohime
    He was left behind in his time.
[17:43] Young Otohime
    He lost all hope and chose death.
[17:46] Shinpachi
    Is this what Kamenashi-san
    was talking about?
[17:51] Young Otohime
    Believing that he'll regain
    consciousness someday,
[17:54] Young Otohime
    I've placed him in a cold sleep.
[17:58] Young Otohime
    Now his body will never be destroyed.
[18:02] Young Otohime
    He will continue to sleep
    in his beautiful state,
[18:05] Young Otohime
    never changing, until
    the day he awakens.
[18:10] Young Otohime
    But I don't know if I'm
    doing the right thing.
[18:14] Young Otohime
    He was so depressed about being
    all alone and chose death.
[18:19] Young Otohime
    Even if he wakes up in the far future,
[18:23] Young Otohime
    he'll awaken in a completely
    different world.
[18:25] Young Otohime
    It'll be just like before only worse.
[18:29] Young Otohime
    If that happens, what should I tell him?
[18:34] Young Otohime
    I may be repeating the same mistake.
[18:40] Young Otohime
    Even so... Even if I am... I...
[18:47] Urashima
    It sure is beautiful...
[18:50] Young Otohime
    It looks as if pearls have been
    scattered, doesn't it?
[18:52] Young Otohime
    This is one of the most famous
    places in the universe.
[18:59] Urashima
    This is the first time I've seen
    something so beautiful.
[19:06] Urashima
    Otohime-sama... You're...
[19:10] Urashima
    absolutely beautiful.
[19:18] Young Otohime
    I want to see him...
[19:20] Young Otohime
    Once more...
[19:23] Young Otohime
    No matter how many hundreds
    or thousands of years it takes.
[19:28] Otohime
    Countless men after him have
    told me that same cheap line.
[19:34] Otohime
    But his words... Why can't
    I forget his words?
[19:40] Otohime
    I've lived for thousands of
    years, but his words...
[19:46] Young Otohime (Mono)
    I must live and stay beautiful.
[19:48] ---
    No matter how many thousands
    of years pass.
[19:51] Young Otohime (Mono)
    So that he can recognize me.
[19:56] Young Otohime (Mono)
    So that when he awakens,
    he won't be lonely.
[20:00] Young Otohime (Mono)
    Even if the world changes,
    I must remain the same.
[20:05] Young Otohime (Mono)
    I must wait for him looking as beautiful
    as I was when he knew me.
[20:12] ---
    I must let you know that
    you're not alone...
[20:17] ---
    that there was one person in this
    world who was waiting for you.
[20:21] Young Otohime (Mono)
    I'll become the pearl that shines
    in the depths of the sea.
[20:24] Young Otohime (Mono)
    Follow that light and return to me.
[20:29] Young Otohime (Mono)
    I'll always be waiting for you.
[20:36] Shinpachi
    Otohime...
[20:44] Shinpachi
    Ryugu Palace is shaking?!
[20:49] Hasegawa
    What are these tremors?!
[20:51] Kamenashi
    Hey!
[21:00] Otohime
    No matter how much you
    resist, it's useless.
[21:04] Otohime
    Ryugu Palace will soon be above Edo.
[21:11] Otohime
    The Heavenly Old Age Cannon
    contains pressurized gas...
SIGN    [Heavenly Old Age]
[21:14] Otohime
    ...the equivalent of 100,000
    Treasure Box Gs.
[21:32] Otohime
    If I fire this in the middle of Edo...
[21:34] Otohime
    Everyone who remains on the surface
    will become ugly and old.
[21:42] Otae
    Who would want that?
[21:42] Otae
    Who would want you to do that?!
[21:44] Otae
    Do you think the person
    you're waiting for...
[21:50] Otae
    would really want you to
    do such a terrible thing?!
[21:58] Otohime
    I must be his guide.
[22:03] Otohime
    I must be the most beautiful
    pearl in this world.
[22:11] Otohime
    The only thing that shines in
    the dark depths of the ocean.
[22:18] Otohime
    I'm sure he'll notice that light.
[22:20] Otohime
    He'll follow that light and
    come back to me.
[22:25] Otohime
    In order to do that... In order to become...
[22:28] Otohime
    the only shining pearl...
[22:33] Otohime
    I need to sink everyone else
    into the depths of the ocean.
SIGN    [To be continued...]
SIGN    [There's barely any time left before the Heavenly Old Age Cannon fires.]
SIGN    [The fate of the world is left to Gintoki and Katsura!!]
SIGN    [Ryugu Arc - The Final Chapter]
SIGN    ["Even if Your Back is Bent, Go Straight Forward"]
SIGN    
SIGN    [At the brink of despair... Urashima calls...]