E58 - Croquette Sandwiches Are Always the Most Popular Food Sold at the Stalls

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] Nizo
    A moth flew in the darkness... The moth...
[00:10] Nizo
    Did nothing but fly in complete darkness.
[00:16] Nizo
    Scared of the dark and searching for light, it flew on...
[00:25] Nizo
    When the moth found a light, it flew around and around it...
[00:29] ---
    But...
[00:30] Nizo
    By that time, the moth could no longer pull itself away from the light even if it wanted to.
[00:48] Takechi
    I wish you all the best of luck.
[00:53] Matako
    There's no need to worry, senpai.
[00:57] Tsunpo
    If anything happens, I'll be the one to deal with it.
[01:03] Takechi
    Let's go.
[01:05] Takechi
    It's time to...begin our legend.
SIGN    [Tetsuya Murata is this episode's client. He runs a swordsmith business with his younger sister, Tetsuko.]
SIGN    [His father was, Jintetsu, Edo's best swordsmith. Benizakura, his infamous creation, has gone missing...]
[03:01] Nizo
    Excuse me a moment.
[03:03] Nizo
    I'm looking for Kotaro Katsura-dono.
[03:07] Katsura
    You've got the wrong guy.
[03:09] Nizo
    No need to worry.
[03:10] Nizo
    I'm not one of those Bakufu government dogs or anything.
[03:13] Katsura
    You're a dog, but more like the bloodthirsty, rabid kind.
[03:17] Katsura
    I've heard there's been a Tsujigiri roaming the streets lately.
SIGN    [Note: A Tsujigiri is someone who kills innocent people randomly in order to test a new sword or skill.]
[03:21] Katsura
    You should be careful who you try to bite.
[03:25] Nizo
    Unfortunately, my partner and I thirst for the blood of strong men like you.
[03:31] Nizo
    Will you fight me?
[03:36] Katsura
    Shit! That sword...
[03:42] Nizo
    Oh, my... Is that all you've got?
SIGN    ["Croquette Sandwiches Are Always the Most Popular Food Sold at the Stalls"]
[03:57] Onlooker A
    Hey, what's all the hubbub?
[03:59] Onlooker B
    It seems another corpse popped up.
[04:01] Onlooker A
    Oh, that Tsujigiri again? How many people has he killed now?
[04:04] Onlooker C
    I've heard that... He only goes after ronin.
[04:07] Onlooker C
    It's so scary that I can't go out on the town at night.
[04:11] Onlooker D
    Well, that just means... You'll have to stay home and take care of your wife.
[04:27] Shinpachi
    Here's your tea.
[04:30] Gintoki
    Umm... What brings you here today?
[04:38] Gintoki
    What is this? Why has she come here? She's creepy.
[04:43] ---
    She's been silent this whole time. Is she mad?
[04:45] ---
    Is she mad about something? Did I do something bad to her?
[04:48] Shinpachi
    Is she angry? She's smiling, isn't she?
[04:50] Kagura
    Shinpachi, she doesn't like your tea.
[04:54] Kagura
    Our guest is a coffee person, not a tea person, uh-huh.
[04:57] ---
    You're a tea server. You should be able to figure out which one she is.
[05:00] ---
    That's why you're Shinpachi, not Shinichi. What is a "pachi"?
SIGN    [NOTE: The "pachi" in "Shinpachi" means "eight" in Japanese. "Ichi" means "one" in Japanese.]
[05:04] Shinpachi
    There's no way I can tell that just by looking at her!
[05:06] Gintoki
    I noticed it right away. Take a look at our guest.
[05:09] Gintoki
    Her mouth looks like a coffee bean.
[05:12] Gintoki
    You don't have very good observational skills.
[05:14] Shinpachi
    Here's your coffee.
[05:18] Gintoki
    Hey! What is that?!
[05:19] ---
    Nothing's changed at all!!
[05:21] Shinpachi
    You said her mouth looked like a coffee bean!!
[05:24] Gintoki
    I did not. I was talking about the side-view of a dorayaki.
SIGN    [NOTE: Dorayaki is a Japanese sweet that consists of two pancake-like patties with sweet red bean paste in between.]
[05:29] Gintoki
    Really, could you cut it out already?
[05:32] Gintoki
    Why does it have to be so tense in my own home?
[05:36] Gintoki
    I feel like I'd get sucked in if I stared into those eyes.
[05:42] Gintoki
    Oh. Hello. This is the Odd Jobs.
[05:44] Kagura
    Shinpachi, we've got to use our last resort. Let's use it.
[05:48] Shinpachi
    Huh? But that's Gin-san's. He'll get mad.
[05:52] Kagura
    It's all right. He's got to be weaned off of it by now.
[05:56] Kagura
    He has no parents.
[05:58] ---
    We need to raise him into...a proper adult.
[06:02] Gintoki
    Hey, I'm going out for a bit.
[06:04] Shinpachi
    Oh! Hey, where are you going?!
[06:07] Gintoki
    Work. Take care of our guest.
[06:10] Shinpachi
    Liar!! You're just trying to escape!!
[06:22] Shinpachi
    Have some strawberry milk.
[06:27] Katsura
    Elizabeth, samurai should eat plain and simple things.
[06:32] ---
    If you consume strawberry milk, parfaits, and other soft and sweet foods,
[06:37] ---
    then your body as well as your heart will become corrupt.
[06:47] Shinpachi
    It cried!! We did it!! Does she like it that much?!
[06:50] Kagura
    Good job. Well done, Shinpachi!
[06:53] Shinpachi
    Huh? Did we really do it?
[06:58] Gintoki
    Umm... Excuse me. I'm from the Odd Jobs.
[07:02] Gintoki
    Umm... Excuse me. I'm from the Odd Jobs!
[07:06] Gintoki
    Excuse me. I'm the Odd Jobs guy!
[07:09] Gintoki
    Excuse me. I'm the Odd Jobs guy!
[07:12] Tetsuya
    Huh?! What'd you say?!
[07:14] Gintoki
    I'm the Odd Jobs guy! We talked on the phone!!
[07:19] Tetsuya
    I told you I don't need a newspaper!!
[07:22] Gintoki
    Stupid, stupid piece of crap! You can't hear me anyway.
[07:26] Tetsuya
    I've done a terrible thing!!
[07:29] Tetsuya
    I'm all sweaty from working, so my hand slipped. I'm sorry!
[07:34] Gintoki
    It's all right.
[07:36] Gintoki
    They definitely heard me.
[07:38] Tetsuya
    I haven't told you yet...
[07:39] Tetsuya
    We siblings are swordsmiths!
[07:43] ---
    I'm Tetsuya, the older brother!
[07:45] ---
    And this is...
[07:47] Tetsuya
    Hey, at least greet him, Tetsuko!
[07:50] Tetsuya
    If you don't say your name, Sakata-san won't know what to call you, Tetsuko!!
[07:54] Gintoki
    Big Brother, you already told him my name. And loudly.
[07:57] Tetsuya
    Sorry, Sakata-san, she's a shy beast!
[08:03] Gintoki
    Anyway, it must be pretty tough being a sword smith when swords have been outlawed.
[08:08] Tetsuya
    Anyway, the job I want you to do is...
[08:11] Gintoki
    Hey, you're ignoring me? Maybe he didn't hear me...
[08:14] Tetsuya
    Actually, someone stole Benizakura, the masterpiece
[08:18] Tetsuya
    that the late head...in other words, my father, created!
[08:22] Gintoki
    Oh?! And what is Benizakura?
[08:25] Tetsuya
    I want you to find it.
[08:28] Gintoki
    What?! He can't hear me again?!
[08:30] Tetsuya
    Benizakura is a sword forged by my father, Jintetsu,
[08:34] Tetsuya
    who was considered the greatest swordsmith in Edo.
[08:36] ---
    It was said to be his greatest creation.
[08:39] ---
    Its blade could split boulders and gleams pale crimson in the moonlight.
[08:45] ---
    It's as mysterious and beautiful as cherry blossoms at night.
[08:48] ---
    A truly splendid sword that has no equal.
[08:52] Gintoki
    Is that so?! That's amazing!
[08:55] Gintoki
    So do you have any idea who stole it?
[08:56] Tetsuya
    But the Benizakura is a thing no human should ever touch.
[09:01] Gintoki
    Sir?! Listen to what other people have to say!!
[09:03] Gintoki
    Where are you looking? Are you looking at me?!
[09:05] Tetsuya
    It all started when my father mysteriously died one month after forging the Benizakura.
[09:10] ---
    Ever since then, misfortune has befallen
[09:13] ---
    everyone who became involved with the Benizakura!
[09:15] ---
    It's... It's a demon sword that consumes people's souls!
[09:19] Gintoki
    Come on. Give me a break. That means misfortune might fall on me too!!
[09:26] Tetsuya
    Sakata-san.
[09:28] Tetsuya
    Please find the Benizakura before it causes any more tragedy!
[09:33] Gintoki
    Listen to me!! He hasn't heard a single thing I've said!!
[09:37] Tetsuko
    When you talk to my brother...
[09:40] Tetsuko
    You've got to get close to his ear and speak from your diaphragm.
[09:43] Gintoki
    Huh? Really?!
[09:47] Gintoki
    Sir!! Excuse me!!
[09:49] Tetsuko
    Shut up!!
[09:54] Shinpachi
    So you're saying you found that here?
[09:58] Shinpachi
    That bloody thing.
[10:00] Shinpachi
    Furthermore, you haven't seen Katsura-san for several days?
[10:04] ---
    Why didn't you tell us about this earlier, Elizabeth?
SIGN    [A Tsujigiri has been roaming the streets lately... Do you suppose that...]
[10:10] Shinpachi
    Elizabeth, you know better than anyone
[10:14] Shinpachi
    that Katsura-san isn't the sort of person who would lose to some Tsujigiri.
[10:18] Kagura
    But looking at this, it's obvious something happened to him.
[10:22] Kagura
    If we don't find him quickly, something terrible might happen.
[10:27] Shinpachi
    Katsura-san...
SIGN    [It may already be too late...]
[10:32] Shinpachi
    You idiot!!
SIGN    [Gah!!]
[10:40] Shinpachi
    If you don't believe in Katsura-san, then who will?!
[10:47] Shinpachi
    When you were captured by that evil magistrate,
[10:51] Shinpachi
    Katsura-san never gave up on you, no matter what!
[10:55] Shinpachi
    Right now, what is it you must do, Elizabeth?!
[10:58] Shinpachi
    What must you do for Katsura-san?!
[11:00] Shinpachi
    Tell me!!
[11:01] ---
    Say it! Say it!!
[11:03] Elizabeth
    That hurts.
[11:07] Elizabeth
    That hurts. Let go of me. Or I'll rip your guts out.
[11:14] Shinpachi
    Sorry!!
[11:17] Kagura
    Shinpachi, I'm going to look around with Sadaharu.
[11:21] Kagura
    You look for the Tsujigiri with Lizzie!!
SIGN    [Recycled Goods Shop Earth Defense Army Base]
[11:36] Daughter
    A demon sword? There's no way there'd be one in a recycle shop.
[11:41] Gintoki
    Well, nowadays you can buy demon swords by mail order.
[11:44] Daughter
    Those are knockoffs.
[11:47] Gintoki
    I've been to numerous pawnshops, but it's nowhere to be found.
[11:50] Gintoki
    I thought the thief would sell it.
[11:53] Gintoki
    But if money isn't what he was after, that means...
[11:58] Daughter
    I don't know if this is the same demon sword you're looking for,
[12:02] Daughter
    but I've heard rumors of a strange sword.
[12:06] Daughter
    You know there's been a Tsujigiri roaming the area lately, right?
[12:09] ---
    Well, everyone who's met him has been killed,
[12:13] ---
    but there was a guy who saw him from a distance.
[12:15] ---
    He said the sword the slayer wielded was more like a living thing than a sword.
[12:21] Daughter
    Well, you should be careful of that Tsujigiri, too.
[12:32] Ronin A
    Kawakami-dono, we'll be arriving soon.
[12:39] Ronin A
    Bansai-dono, we'll be arriving soon!!
[12:44] Ronin A
    We'll be arriving soon! Can you hear me?!
[12:48] Tsunpo
    Okay. Got it...
SIGN    [Otsu's New Album "Your Father is a XX"]
[12:52] Tsunpo
    Now then...
[12:54] Tsunpo
    I wonder if my smooth-talking can win them over...
[13:00] Tsunpo
    This is a once-in-a-lifetime production.
SIGN    [Sake]
SIGN    [Defeat the Tsujigiri]
[13:10] Shinpachi
    Greetings!!
SIGN    [Note: Yakisoba is a sort of fried noodles.]
[13:12] Shinpachi
    Elizabeth-senpai, I bought you some yakisoba buns!
SIGN    [I asked for a croquette sandwich.]
[13:17] Shinpachi
    They were sold out, so I got you the closest thing I could find.
[13:21] ---
    Sorry.
[13:23] Shinpachi
    How's it going? Has the Tsujigiri shown up?
[13:28] Shinpachi
    But don't you think it's a little reckless to ask the Tsujigiri in person about Katsura-san?
[13:33] Shinpachi
    We're not even sure if he's the culprit.
[13:39] Shinpachi
    Hey, what are you doing?!
SIGN    [Eligo 13 (on headband)] [Note: Parody of the manga series Golgo 13. Elizabeth + Golgo 13]
SIGN    
[13:44] Shinpachi
    Shut up! I can't even tell which side of you is the front or the back!
[13:49] Officer A
    Hey.
[13:50] Officer A
    What are you doing here?
[13:53] ---
    You're kind of suspicious.
[13:55] Shinpachi
    Oh... It's a policeman from the magistrate. Don't scare me like that.
[13:59] Officer A
    Don't give me that. I'm asking you what you're doing.
SIGN    [We don't need to tell you!]
[14:05] Officer A
    Don't you two understand?
[14:07] Officer A
    Lately, there's been...
[14:15] Nizo
    A Tsujigiri in the area. It's very dangerous.
[14:21] Shinpachi (Mono)
    Eliza...
[14:22] Shinpachi (Mono)
    Elizabeth!!
[14:32] Gintoki
    Come on. I came here looking for a demon sword...
[14:36] Gintoki
    Only to come across some familiar faces.
[14:38] Shnpachi
    G-Gin-san!!
[14:40] Nizo
    It's true.
[14:41] Nizo
    I've smelled that scent of yours before.
[14:55] Cm Bumpercm Bumpershinpachi
    Y-You're... Butcher...
[14:58] Shinpachi
    Nizo the Butcher!!
[15:00] Shinpachi
    So you were behind those slayings!!
[15:04] Shinpachi
    Gin-san, why are you here?!
[15:06] Gintoki
    Our objectives were different,
[15:08] Gintoki
    but it seems we were looking for the same guy.
[15:11] Gintoki
    Shinpachi-kun.
[15:12] Nizo
    I'm pleased. You came all this way to see me.
[15:17] Nizo
    I heard this was a cursed demon sword that brings misfortune,
[15:21] Nizo
    but it seems to attract the strong too.
[15:24] Nizo
    It allowed me to meet you and Katsura,
[15:26] Nizo
    exactly the people I wanted to see.
[15:28] Nizo
    Maybe it's a sword of good-fortune for me.
[15:32] Shinpachi
    Katsura-san?!
[15:33] ---
    What did you do to Katsura-san?!
[15:35] Nizo
    My, my. He was an acquaintance of yours?
[15:39] Nizo
    Sorry about that.
[15:41] Nizo
    I was playing around with my new sword and I ended up killing him.
[15:46] Gintoki
    Zura would never lose to a low rent cutthroat like you.
[15:50] Nizo
    Don't get angry. I apologize for that.
[15:53] ---
    Oh yeah.
[15:56] Nizo
    Here. At the very least, I'll give you a memento of him.
[16:01] Nizo
    I cut it off of him as a trophy, but I'm sure he'd want you to have it.
[16:07] ---
    But is Katsura really a man?
[16:11] ---
    This smooth hair is as silky and soft as a woman's.
[16:19] Gintoki
    Don't make me repeat myself.
[16:21] Gintoki
    Zura would never lose against a small fry like you.
[16:27] Nizo
    Indeed. I'm no match for him.
[16:30] Nizo
    But I wasn't the one who killed him.
[16:34] Nizo
    I just let it use my body for a bit.
[16:38] Nizo
    Right, Benizakura?
[16:41] Gintoki
    T-This is...
[16:45] Kagura
    It's gotten really dark.
[16:48] Kagura
    Sadaharu, if we don't go soon home, Gin-chan and Shinpachi will worry about us.
[16:51] Kagura
    Or not.
[16:55] Kagura
    I think Zura will be okay. There's no way he'd die so easily.
[17:00] Kagura
    Let's go home for today and look for him tomorrow.
[17:04] Kagura
    Sadaharu?
[17:08] Kagura
    Sadaharu, have you picked up Zura's scent here?
[17:19] Kagura
    What is that boat?
[17:21] Ronin A
    Hey.
[17:22] Ronin A
    Did you find him?
[17:24] Ronin B
    It's no good. Okada-san's got that illness again... He's been real quiet...
[17:28] Ronin B
    Ever since he was defeated by some ronin, too.
[17:33] Ronin C
    He's really dangerous.
[17:35] Ronin C
    He was bragging that he defeated Katsura. I wouldn't put it past him.
[17:39] Ronin A
    What are we going to do?
[17:41] Ronin A
    This happened because you weren't keeping watch over him.
[17:43] Ronin A
    If the existence of that thing ever came to light...
[17:45] Ronin C
    Anyway, let's go back to the ship and start over.
[17:50] Kagura
    Sadaharu, take this to Gin-chan and the others.
[17:55] Kagura
    Even if you see a cute lady dog, don't take any detours.
[17:59] Kagura
    And don't climb on top of them!
[18:07] Kagura
    All right. I'm off.
[18:29] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!
SIGN    [What a violent development. Did this turn into a different anime?]
[18:46] Nizo
    There!
[19:00] Nizo
    That's odd.
[19:03] Nizo
    I thought you were stronger than that.
[19:06] Gintoki
    That's odd.
[19:08] Gintoki
    Is that thing really a sword?
[19:11] Gintoki
    It's more like a living thing than a sword.
[19:13] ---
    You've got to be kidding.
[19:16] Gintoki
    That's not a living thing...
[19:18] Gintoki
    It's more like a monster!!
[19:22] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!!
[19:34] Gintoki
    Fights aren't only won with swords!
[19:39] Gintoki
    What?!
[19:42] Nizo
    This isn't a fight.
[19:45] Nizo
    It's a battle to the death.
[19:54] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!!
[19:56] Gintoki (Mono)
    Is he an alien or something?
[19:59] ---
    This strength isn't human.
[20:05] Gintoki
    Hey, this is bad...
[20:14] Shinpachi (Mono)
    No way. This can't be. Gin-san is...
[20:18] Shinpachi (Mono)
    Gin-san is... Gin-san is...
[20:23] Shinpachi (Mono)
    Gin-san!!
[20:24] Nizo
    Do you regret not killing me in our last battle?
[20:32] Nizo
    If you had killed me, this wouldn't have happened to you and Katsura.
[20:37] Nizo
    This all came to pass because of your naivety.
[20:41] Nizo
    The White Knight.
[20:44] Nizo
    He's probably really disappointed.
[20:47] Nizo
    That all the old comrades he fought beside ended up like this.
[20:53] Nizo
    This country turned corrupt because of weak samurai like you.
[20:58] Nizo
    If I had been by his side instead of you, this would still be the Japan of old.
[21:05] Nizo
    Samurai don't need silly things like a warrior code or morals.
[21:10] Nizo
    Samurai only need swords.
[21:13] Nizo
    Your sword is broken. You're no longer a samurai.
[21:17] Nizo
    Weak samurai should vanish from this country.
[21:23] Gintoki
    My sword is broken?
[21:25] Gintoki
    I still have a sword. One more sword, just in case.
[21:30] Nizo (Mono)
    I can't pull it out...
[21:39] Nizo
    Oh, my. You took off my arm. You're really awful.
[21:45] Shinpachi
    Don't come any closer! Or I'll make it a set!
[21:51] Officer B
    Hey! What's going on down there?!
[21:53] Nizo
    Tsk. Such annoyances. We'll finish this later.
[21:58] Nizo
    Let's meet again when we have the chance.
[22:02] Officer C
    Hey, wait!!
[22:06] Shinpachi
    Gin-san! Hang on! Gin-san!
[22:11] Gintoki
    Shinpachi, I knew you had it in you.
[22:17] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!
[22:18] Shinapchi
    Gin-san!!
[22:22] Kagura
    Hey!
[22:24] Kagura
    Are you a part of this ship's crew?
[22:27] Kagura
    Could you show me around? Unless you want me make your head go pop.
[22:34] Kagura
    Hey, you hear me?
SIGN    [Danger approaches...]
SIGN    [Kagura.]
SIGN    [Shinpachi goes after...]
SIGN    [The truth.]
SIGN    [What is the Benzakura?!]
SIGN    [Next Episode: "Be Careful Not to Leave Your Umbrella Somewhere"]
SIGN    [Shinsuke Takasugi shows up in Edo once again. What does he plan to use the cybersword, Benizakura, for?]
SIGN    [Is Katsura really dead?! And what will the badly injured Gintoki do?!]