E87 - "Perform a German Suplex On a Woman Who Asks If She or the Job Is More Important"

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    [Okita's sister, Mitsuba, falls ill right before her marriage to Kuraba.]
SIGN    [Okita only wishes for his sister's remaining days to be happy, but the cold-hearted Hijikata will have none of that.]
SIGN    [Oedo Hospital]
[01:51] Mitsuba
    Gin-san...
[01:53] Mitsuba
    What were you and Yamazaki-san talking about yesterday?
[01:56] Gintoki
    Huh? Nothing. Don't worry about it.
[02:00] Mitsuba
    If you put it like that, it makes me worry even more.
[02:03] Gintoki
    Come on, don't ask silly questions.
[02:05] ---
    When men get together and talk secretly about something...
[02:07] Gintoki
    ...then it's gotta be about this. You wanna see it?
SIGN    [The Nurse's Fluttering Flowers.]
[02:10] Mitsuba
    Oh my!
[02:13] Mitsuba
    I guess boys will always be boys.
[02:16] ---
    They'll get together and be up to no good.
[02:24] Mitsuba
    Just like them...
[02:25] Kondo
    That's all for today.
[02:27] Mitsuba
    They look the happiest when they're with other guys.
[02:31] Mitsuba
    There really was no room for girls.
[02:42] Mitsuba
    And then they left without me.
[02:46] Mitsuba
    They didn't even look back.
[02:52] Gintoki
    What a bunch of terrible guys to have left such a good woman behind.
[02:58] Mitsuba
    I know. That's why I'm going to become super happy and put them all to shame!
[03:06] Mitsuba
    Being single up to this age and my poor health have caused So-chan a lot of worry.
[03:12] ---
    I have to find happiness so So-chan will no longer have to worry about me.
[03:16] Mitsuba
    Yes, I have to become happy.
[03:21] Yamazaki
    Tenkaiya, the family Mitsuba will marry into...
[03:23] Yamazaki
    has some shady connections with the Anti-Foreigner Faction.
[03:31] Gintoki
    Hey, you okay? You should get some rest.
[03:33] ---
    You're putting stress on your body.
[03:36] Mitsuba
    I'm...okay...
[03:39] ---
    I just want to talk with someone for a little bit...
[03:42] Mitsuba
    ...more...
[03:47] Gintoki
    Hey!
[03:52] Yamazaki
    Her condition suddenly turned worse.
[03:55] Yamazaki
    It's not looking good.
[03:59] Yamazaki
    Her family should prepare for the worst.
[04:02] Yamazaki
    That's what the doctor said.
[04:06] Yamazaki
    Vice-Chief, please go to her.
[04:09] Yamazaki
    How can you work at a time like this?
[04:11] ---
    And not only that, you're going to arrest Mitsuba's fiancé of all people...
[04:16] Yamazaki
    That's cruel...too cruel.
[04:19] ---
    Please think of Mitsuba and Captain Okita's feelings.
[04:23] Yamazaki
    I don't think you're doing the wrong thing.
[04:27] Yamazaki
    If we leave them be, then eventually their weapons may kill one of our own.
[04:33] Yamazaki
    But what should be done right now...isn't this.
[04:36] ---
    Hijikata-san, this is not where you should be right now.
[04:42] Hijikata
    Humph.
[04:43] Hijikata
    Are you trying to say I'm cold and heartless?
[04:46] ---
    I don't think so.
[04:49] Hijikata
    His wife is dying and yet the husband's out here trying to cut a deal.
[04:56] Yamazaki
    Hijikata-san.
[04:57] Hijikata
    Yamazaki, you haven't told anyone else about this, have you?
[05:01] Yamazaki
    N-No...
[05:03] Hijikata
    So you and I are the only ones in the organization who know of this, right?
[05:06] Yamazaki
    Yes.
[05:07] Hijikata
    In that case, I want you to keep this matter confidential, okay?
[05:12] Yamazaki
    Vice-Chief! You're not thinking of...!
[05:14] Yamazaki
    Vice-Chief!!
[05:23] Kondo
    Sogo!
[05:24] Kondo
    You should get some rest.
[05:26] Kondo
    You haven't slept a wink since yesterday.
[05:28] ---
    I'll switch with you. I've already slept.
[05:31] Okita
    Those dark circles.
[05:33] Kondo
    It's just makeup.
[05:36] Kondo
    Huh?
[05:37] Kondo
    Man, it must be nice to be carefree like that.
[05:40] ---
    What's he doing here anyway?
[05:43] Kondo
    I heard you had a huge fight with Toshi.
[05:45] ---
    It's not like you to lose.
[05:48] Okita
    Please don't talk about that bastard right now.
[05:52] Kondo
    He didn't go into detail, but this is what he told me.
[05:56] ---
    He said he feels like he would never lose to you right now.
[05:58] Okita
    I asked you not to talk about him!
[06:01] Okita
    What's the deal? Why does everyone talk about Toshi all the time?
[06:07] Okita
    So where the hell is that bastard right now?
[06:09] ---
    My sister's like this yet he won't even show his face.
[06:12] ---
    So he doesn't give a damn if a woman he dumped is dying?
[06:16] ---
    Well I guess that's how it is when you're popular with the girls, huh?
[06:19] Kondo
    Looks like you are tired after all. You should get some rest.
[06:23] Okita
    Do you despise me now?
[06:25] Kondo
    Go rest.
[06:27] Okita
    Am I just a nuisance?
[06:28] ---
    Unlike Hijikata-san...
[06:32] Yamazaki
    Chief!!
[06:34] Yamazaki
    This is terrible!!
[06:35] ---
    The Vice-Chief is...!!
[06:52] Kuraba
    Hm?
[06:55] Hijikata
    You're Toma Kuraba of Tenkaiya, right?
[06:58] ---
    The jig is up.
[07:00] ---
    Cooperate and this will go easier for you.
[07:02] Kuraba
    You're that guy from before...
[07:05] Hijikata
    You are under arrest on charges of smuggling weapons and illegal dealings with ronin.
[07:10] ---
    Come with me quietly.
[07:14] Kuraba
    So you can arrest your friend's fiancé without any hesitation?
[07:17] ---
    You've got a lot of nerve.
[07:20] Hijikata
    Getting involved with a relative of the Shinsengumi while dirtying your hands in a crime like this...
[07:25] Hijikata
    You've got a lot of nerve.
[07:32] Kondo
    Toshi went by himself?
[07:33] Kondo
    Yamazaki! Why didn't you say anything?
[07:36] Yamazaki
    I'm sorry!
[07:37] ---
    But the Vice-Chief swore me to secrecy.
[07:40] Yamazaki
    If the members found out that Captain Okita's relative is connected to Anti-Foreigner Faction samurai,
[07:44] Yamazaki
    then the captain would lose his position in the Shinsengumi.
[07:49] Kondo
    Damn Toshi! He planned on doing this by himself from the start.
[07:53] ---
    How reckless of him.
[07:56] Okita
    ...Why...
[07:58] Hijikata
    Whatever. What you do is up to you.
[08:04] Okita
    That bastard!
[08:07] Kondo
    Don't you dare go anywhere.
[08:09] Kondo
    Stay by Mitsuba-dono.
[08:12] Kondo
    Besides...
[08:14] Kondo
    ...right now, you'll just get in the way.
[08:16] ---
    Those who hesitate with their sword will die.
[08:19] Okita
    So you want me to trust you?
[08:21] ---
    You've gotta be kidding me.
[08:23] ---
    There's no way I'm gonna be indebted to that bastard.
[08:26] Okita
    Kondo-san... You have the wrong idea about me.
[08:30] ---
    I'm not as pure as you think I am.
[08:32] Okita
    I'm not one to trust others.
[08:35] ---
    I only think of myself.
[08:38] ---
    Even when we were together, I always felt a gap between us.
[08:41] ---
    I always felt I was different from you guys.
[08:43] ---
    That's why, my sister, you and him...
[08:49] Yamazaki
    Chief!
[08:53] Okita
    Boy, you really are harsh on me, aren't you, Kondo-san?
[08:58] Kondo
    That's because you're a kid.
[09:00] ---
    If Toshi said the same thing as you, I would've hit him too.
[09:04] ---
    Isn't that how our relationship is?
[09:07] Kondo
    If one of us strayed, then the other two will punch him back to where he belongs.
[09:12] ---
    It's always been like that.
[09:14] ---
    That's why we'll never stray. We'll always live a straight life.
[09:18] Kondo
    We don't know anything about this small gap that you claim to have built.
[09:22] Kondo
    But I'll keep jumping over that and punching you out as many times as I can.
[09:32] Kondo
    Friends like that are hard to find in this life.
[09:36] ---
    We're really lucky, you know.
[09:38] Kondo
    To have found two bad friends like that in our lives.
[09:45] Kondo
    Sogo...
[09:47] Kondo
    If I ever go astray, it will be your turn to punch me, all right?
[09:56] Okita
    She loved him...
[09:59] Okita
    With all her might...
[10:02] Okita
    Even after being treated so coldly by him, she still waited for him to come home.
[10:09] Okita
    She always did.
[10:13] Okita
    She finally got over him and was about to be happy when...
[10:17] Okita
    ...he appeared again.
[10:19] Okita
    How many times will he stand in the way of my sister's happiness?
[10:21] Okita
    What an asshole.
[10:31] Okita
    He's an asshole. He really is...
[10:34] Okita
    But I know... I know that my sister would never fall in love with an asshole.
[10:40] Okita
    In all honesty, I understood.
[10:42] ---
    I understood that a guy who always faced death couldn't risk taking care of my sister.
[10:49] Okita
    I understood...that he turned her down because he thought that would be better for my sister.
[10:54] Okita
    I understood...that all he really wanted was for my sister to be happy.
[11:00] Okita
    I understood all of this... But it still gets on my nerves.
[11:08] Okita
    He pisses me off.
[11:11] Okita
    And that's fine with me.
[11:15] ---
    All right then...
[11:17] ---
    Boss, thanks for listening to my long story.
[11:22] Okita
    Don't tell my sister this, okay?
[11:25] ---
    Oh, never mind, it's not like you were listening anyway.
[11:29] Okita
    He took away a lot of important things from me, but I still gotta go.
[11:35] Okita
    Kondo-san told me I'd die.
[11:38] ---
    So this may be the last time.
[11:40] ---
    I just needed to get it all off my chest to someone, even if it's to a Jizo statue.
SIGN    [Note: Jizo statues are part of the Buddhist religion and said to be guardians of dead children.]
[11:43] Gintoki
    One of the important things you talked about...
[11:45] Gintoki
    ...includes him, right?
[11:48] Okita
    Boss.
[11:53] Gintoki
    That was a good nap.
[11:54] Gintoki
    I'll go with you so I can shake off this grogginess.
[11:58] ---
    After all, I lied to your sister about how we were friends and all.
[12:01] Gintoki
    I'll be with you till the end, Soichiro-kun.
[12:05] Okita
    Boss...those black circles...
[12:08] Gintoki
    Some punks beat me up.
[12:12] Okita
    Sister, I'm a lucky guy.
[12:16] ---
    You don't often meet friends like these in your lifetime.
[12:20] Okita
    Yet, I already have three of these bad friends in my life.
[12:37] Mastermind
    This is not what you told me, Kuraba-dono.
[12:41] Mastermind
    I thought the Bakufu's dogs were already on our side.
[12:44] Mastermind
    But that's Toshiro Hijikata of the Shinsengumi, feared by all as the demon Vice-Chief.
[12:50] Mastermind
    If he's on our trail, then it'll be trouble for you and for us.
[12:55] ---
    I'm sure reinforcements will be arriving soon.
[12:56] Kuraba
    No.
[12:58] Kuraba
    It's already too late for reinforcements.
[13:00] ---
    It looks like he really came here by himself.
[13:03] Mastermind
    By himself? Why?
[13:05] Kuraba
    Who knows? It's difficult for us merchants to understand how a samurai thinks.
[13:12] Mastermind
    If that's the case...
[13:23] Mastermind
    All we have to do is take care of him and we'll be done.
[13:27] Kuraba
    Let's make sure he disappears, okay?
[13:31] Assistant
    Doctor!
[13:32] Assistant
    Her pulse is getting weaker. Her life is in danger.
[13:38] Doctor
    We did everything we could...but...
[13:41] Doctor
    Is her family here?
[13:43] Nurse
    Well, the thing is...
[13:50] Okita
    Sister...
[13:51] ---
    I'm sorry.
[13:53] Okita
    I...
[13:55] Okita
    I...
[14:00] Yamazaki
    Outta the way! Make way for the Shinsengumi!
[14:04] Kondo
    Toshi... That idiot...
[14:08] Kondo
    Who among us would ever want to kick Sogo out of the organization?
[14:12] ---
    We're all comrades, aren't we?
[14:14] Kondo
    You idiot!
[14:16] Kondo
    Why do you always put all the burden on yourself?
[14:20] Kondo
    So you plan on being the bad guy all by yourself too?
[14:24] Kondo
    I know how you feel, Toshi...
[14:27] ---
    ...About Mitsuba-dono!
[14:41] Kuraba
    What a pity.
[14:44] ---
    I'm sure Mitsuba will be sad, too.
[14:46] ---
    To lose one of her old friends.
[14:49] Kuraba
    I really wanted to be on good terms with you people.
[14:54] ---
    If I got the backing of the Shinsengumi,
[14:57] ---
    then I could run my business without any restrictions.
[15:00] Kuraba
    That's why I approached one of your relatives and even set out to marry her,
[15:05] Kuraba
    but who knew she was that sick?
[15:08] Kuraba
    I figured if I had his sister, then Sogo would be easy to control,
[15:13] Kuraba
    but according to her doctor, she doesn't have much time left to live.
[15:17] ---
    It really is a pity.
[15:20] Hijikata
    So from the start, you just used her to get us on your side?
[15:25] Kuraba
    I loved her.
[15:27] ---
    As a merchant, I love things that will make me a profit.
[15:31] ---
    But only as a tool.
[15:35] Kuraba
    She was damaged goods, but I gave her happiness like other people.
[15:40] ---
    If anything, she should thank me.
[15:47] Okita
    I just want her to taste a bit of happiness like other people before she dies.
[15:59] Hijikata
    It's not like you're that much of a nonconformist, you know.
[16:01] Hijikata
    You and I are alike.
[16:03] ---
    I've also done countless horrible acts.
[16:06] Hijikata
    And to top it off, I'm trying to kill the husband of a woman who's dying.
[16:10] ---
    Yeah, that's pretty cruel.
[16:12] Kuraba
    So you can say, we're like two of a kind.
[16:16] ---
    No wonder they call you the demon Vice-Chief.
[16:19] ---
    I think you and I will get along well.
[16:21] Hijikata
    That's really...
[16:23] Hijikata
    ...an exaggeration.
[16:30] Hijikata
    I just...
[16:33] Hijikata
    ...want the girl I love to be happy.
[16:38] Hijikata
    A life like that is impossible for a guy like me who lives by the sword.
[16:43] Hijikata
    I just wanted her to marry a normal guy somewhere,
[16:48] Hijikata
    have kids like everyone else and live a normal life.
[16:53] Hijikata
    That's all...
[16:57] Kuraba
    I see...
[16:58] ---
    Well, like I said, it's hard for us merchants to understand how a samurai thinks.
[17:06] Kuraba
    Fire!!
[17:09] Kuraba
    What's going on?
[17:11] Underling A
    I-I don't know.
[17:13] Kondo
    Go!
[17:17] Underling B
    It's the Shinsengumi!
[17:24] Kondo
    Toshi!!
[17:28] Underling C
    Die!
[17:32] Kondo
    Toshi!!
[17:35] Kuraba
    Start the car.
[17:36] Underlng A
    Yes, sir.
[17:37] Kuraba
    I misjudged them.
[17:39] ---
    I guess it's impossible to work with barbaric monkeys after all.
[17:44] Kuraba
    Head to the hospital.
[17:46] ---
    That woman may be dying but she can still be used as a hostage.
[17:52] Kuraba
    You bastard!!
[17:56] Kuraba
    Sh-Shake him off!
[17:57] ---
    What the hell are you doing?
[17:59] ---
    Hurry up and shoot him!
[18:05] Hijikata
    You!
[18:10] Gintoki
    Don't worry.
[18:12] Gintoki
    I just went to get some rice crackers for her.
[18:13] Gintoki
    You go deliver it to her!
[18:18] Gintoki
    I'm sure she'll be happier to get them from you.
[18:45] Mitsuba
    You're leaving me behind.
[18:48] Mitsuba
    So make sure you don't go astray.
[18:50] Mitsuba
    Walk down the path you have chosen for yourself.
[18:53] Mitsuba
    Please...okay...?
[19:36] Okita
    Sis...
[19:38] Okita
    I'm sorry...
[19:41] Okita
    I'm...a good-for-nothing brother.
[19:45] Okita
    In the end, I'm the one who robbed you of your happiness.
[19:52] ---
    I'm sorry.
[19:54] Okita
    Sorry...
[20:03] Mitsuba
    So-chan,
[20:06] Mitsuba
    it's okay.
[20:08] ---
    You've worked so hard...
[20:11] ---
    You've grown...grown up into such a great man.
[20:17] ---
    You've gotten so strong.
[20:20] Okita
    ...Sis.
[20:22] Okita
    I'm not strong... I'm not... I'm...
[20:28] Mitsuba
    You mustn't look back...
[20:32] Mitsuba
    You're the one who decided, right? Back then...
[20:37] Mitsuba
    It was the path you chose.
[20:42] Mitsuba
    Then you mustn't apologize...
[20:47] ---
    And you mustn't cry...
[20:52] Mitsuba
    You never looked back.
[20:54] Mitsuba
    You just looked straight ahead and kept walking.
[20:57] Mitsuba
    I loved looking at your backs as you walked away.
[21:01] Mitsuba
    You were all gruff, impudent and clumsy.
[21:08] Mitsuba
    Yet you were all so kind and I loved you for that.
[21:15] Mitsuba
    That's why... I...was so very happy.
[21:23] ---
    To have been able to meet wonderful people like you.
[21:29] Mitsuba
    To have had...a wonderful little brother like you...
[21:36] Mitsuba
    So-chan...
[21:39] ---
    You are...
[21:42] ---
    ...the brother I am so proud of...
SIGN    [Super Spicy Rice Crackers]
[22:20] Hijikata
    Man, this is spicy.
[22:22] ---
    So spicy!
[22:25] ---
    Dammit, what the hell...?
[22:28] Hijikata
    It's so spicy, it's making me cry...
[22:34] ---
    Man, it's spicy...
[22:49] Gintoki
    It's spicy.
SIGN    
[24:21] Gintoki
    The brave warriors of Babel are trying to stop the construction of the Filthy Tower.
[24:27] Gintoki
    The next episode... "The Most Exciting Part of a Group Date is Before it Starts."
SIGN    [The brave warriors of Babel are trying to stop the construction of the Filthy Tower.]
SIGN    [Will they be able to stop the horrible plan?]