E69 - "Please Help by Separating Your Trash"

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    [Breakfast should be a raw egg on hot rice. It tastes so good with a little soy sauce drizzled on top.]
SIGN    [Today, "Tama-chan" appears. She was given that name by Kagura, who loves eggs.]
[01:41] Narrator
    Trash... It is a single word, but there are many different types.
[01:47] Narrator
    A woman with a cane came to throw away a single bag.
[01:51] Narrator
    A smelly bag that oozed blood.
[01:55] Narrator
    The trash collector thought it strange, but did not check its contents
[01:59] Narrator
    and threw it into his truck.
[02:02] Narrator
    The woman stared at him with eerie vacant eyes watching as he threw away the bag.
[02:08] Narrator
    More than anything, the woman's bizarre appearance made him nervous.
[02:12] Narrator
    It was summer, yet she wore heavy clothing that did not show any of her skin.
[02:16] Narrator
    Her hands that were just barely exposed were tightly wrapped in bandages.
[02:21] Narrator
    The following day, the woman came again, carrying a smelly bag.
[02:26] Narrator
    And the next, and the day after that, the woman came with a bag,
[02:30] Narrator
    dragging her body which grew weaker by the day; staring at the trash collector.
[02:35] Narrator
    One day, the woman did not come.
[02:38] Narrator
    but the usual smelly bag was on top of the trash pile.
[02:42] Narrator
    The woman's stare was not here.
[02:46] Narrator
    The trash collector peeked inside the bag.
[02:51] Narrator
    The woman stared at him...just as she always had.
[02:58] Refuse Collector
    This isn't right. Today is recyclable trash day.
[03:01] Refuse Collector
    You're combustible trash!
[03:03] Woman
    I'm sorry...
SIGN    Let's sort our trash!
SIGN    [Let's sort our trash!]
[03:06] Woman
    If you don't, I might haunt you.
[03:10] Gintoki
    You call that a commercial? What bad taste!
[03:14] ---
    They have to resort to such threats because no one follows the trash schedule.
[03:17] Gintoki
    Oh...
[03:19] Gintoki
    Tomorrow is non-combustible trash day...
[03:21] Gintoki
    I put out the JUMP...
[03:25] Gintoki
    No harm.
[03:26] Woman
    I might haunt you.
[03:30] Gintoki
    Don't be ridiculous. We're not kids here.
[03:33] Gintoki
    I can go and get it tomorrow.
[03:38] Kagura
    Geez...
[03:40] ---
    What do you want at this hour?
[03:42] Gintoki
    Nothing, it's just the trash...
[03:45] Gintoki
    I'm worried about it.
[03:47] Kagura
    Why do I have to go with you? Staying up late is terrible for my complexion.
[03:51] Kagura
    Don't you realize that?
[03:53] Gintoki
    Silly, you misunderstand. It's not that I'm scared or anything.
[03:56] Gintoki
    Just so you know, I threw away your favorite magazine with the JUMP.
[04:01] Kagura
    Seriously? My Lady's Eight, with the evil daughter-in-law special article?
SIGN    [Note: Spoof on the magazine "Jyosei Seven."]
[04:04] Gintoki
    Help me retrieve it.
[04:06] Kagura
    No, something stinks.
[04:07] Gintoki
    Okay, you don't have to help me. Just stay by me.
[04:11] Kagura
    No, something stinks.
[04:12] Gintoki
    Cut it out! Stop being so selfish!
[04:15] Gintoki
    I came to you because I was trying to help you!
[04:18] Gintoki
    Forget it! I get it! I won't ask you! Suit yourself!
[04:21] ---
    Just stand quietly and watch!
[04:23] Gintoki
    Don't go anywhere. Just stay and watch me!
[04:26] Kagura
    I don't want to. I'm sleepy, so I'm going home.
[04:28] Gintoki
    Kagura-chan!
[04:30] ---
    I'm sorry!
[04:30] ---
    All you have to do is sing the "Doraemon" song right here!
[04:36] Gintoki
    What?!
[04:37] ---
    Sounds like a theme song I've heard somewhere before.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of theme song for the mystery show "Yo ni mo kimyo na monogatari" -Tales of the Unusual.]
[04:40] ---
    That is you, isn't it, Kagura-chan? That is you, right?!
[04:42] Gintoki
    Dammit!! I'm not giving in!
[04:46] Gintoki
    Ran ran ra ra ran ran ran.
SIGN    [Note: He's singing an off-beat version of the Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind song.]
[04:48] Man
    Hey! Keep it down! Do you know what time it is?!
[04:51] Gintoki
    I'm sorry, mister!
[04:52] ---
    Mister, would you mind watching me? From there?
[04:55] Man
    What? What a creepy thing to ask! I'll call the police!
[04:58] Gintoki
    Please, really!
[04:58] Man
    Don't even ask!
[05:02] Gintoki
    Okay, got it!
[05:05] ---
    Hey, you're being rude, Kagura. You're disturbing the neighborhood!
[05:09] ---
    Mister, watch me until I'm done.
[05:12] Fuyo
    Roger.
[05:14] Fuyo
    Target... acquired.
[05:17] Fuyo
    Switching to analysis mode.
[05:20] Fuyo
    Blood pressure, heart rate both rising...
[05:24] Fuyo
    Target has lost consciousness.
SIGN    ["Please Help by Separating Your Trash"]
[05:42] Gintoki
    What the hell are you doing?
[05:44] Kagura
    Good morning.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of Cozy Tomita who is an impersonator for Tamori, who is the host of "Yo ni mo kimyo na monogatari" -Tales of the Unusual.]
[05:46] ---
    Did you cut your hair?
[05:46] Gintoki
    No, I haven't! What sort of mean prank is this while I'm asleep?!
[05:51] Gintoki
    Geez!
[05:53] Gintoki
    No wonder I have such terrible dreams.
[05:54] Kagura
    Let's eat.
[05:56] Kagura
    What kind of dreams?
[05:58] Gintoki
    A dismembered head...
[06:00] ---
    Never mind. They say never to talk about the dreams you see while sleeping or awake.
[06:05] ---
    I'd only be a laughingstock.
[06:06] Kagura
    A dismembered head at the trash disposal area?
[06:08] Gintoki
    How did you...?
[06:09] Kagura
    You were having a nightmare. You're too old to be having nightmares like a little kid.
[06:13] Gintoki
    Don't tell Shinpachi, okay? I'll give you 300 yen.
[06:17] ---
    I don't remember what I did before I went to sleep. What was I doing yesterday?
[06:21] Kagura
    You went to the trash disposal area to get your JUMP.
[06:23] Kagura
    You didn't come back, so I went to check and found you asleep in the disposal area.
[06:29] Gintoki
    Kagura-chan... Kagura-chan...
[06:31] Gintoki
    What is that?
[06:32] Kagura
    An egg cracker! I found it yesterday.
[06:35] Gintoki
    No, no, no, no, no. Nooooo!
[06:37] Gintoki
    That's no egg cracker! It's that dismembered head from yesterday!
[06:41] Gintoki
    Y-You! I wasn't dreaming! Why did you take that thing, you dummy?!
[06:45] Kagura
    It's not a dismembered head. It's an egg cracker.
[06:48] Gintoki
    What are you talking about, kid?! What do you mean, an egg cracker?!
[06:51] Gintoki
    There's not such thing!
[06:52] Kagura
    Eggs are something you want to crack over someone's head.
[06:56] Kagura
    But that would be rude. So now I have this!
[06:59] Gintoki
    No! Absolutely not!
[07:01] Gintoki
    Hey! What's with this scene!
[07:03] Gintoki
    It's not something you want to see in the evening!
[07:05] Gintoki
    Go and put it back! Put it back where it was!
[07:07] Kagura
    No! That's my egg cracker! I'm not letting you have it!
[07:11] Gintoki
    That's enough! If anyone around here sees that thing...!
[07:18] Gintoki
    Sadaharu, please don't do that.
[07:21] ---
    That's not a toy. Okay? Let me have it. I'll give you beef jerky.
[07:24] Kagura
    Sadaharu! That's my egg cracker!
[07:27] Gintoki
    I told you, that's not an egg cracker!
[07:29] Gintoki
    Give it up! I'll be your egg cracker from tomorrow on, so give it up!
[07:33] ---
    Was that a new pickup line?
[07:37] Gintoki
    Forget it! Don't say I didn't tell you!
[07:41] Shinpachi
    Sh-Shinpachi! Don't touch it! You'll leave your prints on it!
[07:44] Shinpachi
    Don't leave any evidence behind! Get rid of it quickly!
[07:47] Shinpachi
    Isn't this Etsuko-chan?
[07:48] Gintoki
    Etsuko-chan?! Someone you know named Etsuko-chan?!
[07:51] Shinpachi
    No.
[07:52] Shinpachi
    This is Etsuko-chan, the robot maid that's popular these days.
[07:56] Gintoki
    Robot?
[07:57] Kagura
    You're wrong! It's an egg cracker!
SIGN    [Robot Shop]
[08:02] Gintoki
    The dream mechanical doll that cooks, does the laundry and can even take care of office work.
[08:07] Gintoki
    Hey, this is awesome.
[08:09] Gintoki
    There's a mother-in-law version and even a Tsundere version.
SIGN    [Note: Tsundere = a conceited, spiky, combative personality that suddenly becomes modest and loving.]
[08:12] ---
    We've really come a long way...
[08:15] Shinpachi
    From what I hear, it does what you say, works hard and is more useful than a human.
[08:19] Shinpachi
    It's extremely popular with businesses and stores.
[08:22] Shinpachi
    The price is not something an ordinary person can afford, though.
[08:25] Gintoki
    So, how do you know so much, Shinpachi?
[08:28] Shinpachi
    Huh? It's quite popular among otaku, as well.
[08:31] Gintoki
    Hey...this boy's having naughty thoughts. He wants it to do everything he asks.
[08:36] Shinpachi
    What...?
[08:37] Kagura
    Seriously gross. Don't talk to me for a while.
[08:39] Shinpachi
    Wh-What?! Do you know about dreams men have of maids?!
[08:43] Gintoki
    So, how's it look, old man?
[08:44] Gengai
    It was quite beat up.
[08:46] Gintoki
    Of course it was. Its head was, after all, dismembered.
[08:49] Gengai
    But the important parts don't appear to be damaged. I can probably fix it.
[08:54] Gintoki
    But, old man, you can't relax, either.
[08:58] Gintoki
    With something like this on the market,
[09:01] Gintoki
    the day won't be long when Edo's number one mechanic is surpassed.
[09:04] Gengai
    What're you talking about?
[09:05] ---
    Making such a wimpy robot... He's still creating poor-quality work.
[09:11] Gengai
    Okay, done! I had to make do with what I had, so it's a bit unbalanced.
[09:16] Gintoki
    Just a minute!
[09:17] Gengai
    With what you had?! The entire body was stolen from someplace else!
[09:21] Gengai
    It'll withstand even a year-long war.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of Gundam.]
[09:24] Gintoki
    Why would a maid battle for a year! Why does a maid need a shield?!
[09:27] Gengai
    She can hide behind the shield and see lots of things...like a family's problems.
[09:31] Gintoki
    She doesn't need to see those things! Leave those to Etsuko Ichihara!
SIGN    [Spoof of "Kaseifu wa miteita" (Maid saw them all). Etsuko Ichihara plays a maid who sees scandals in the house she works in.]
[09:35] Gintoki
    I thought she'd be good for some cash.
[09:38] Gintoki
    I can't sell her unless you give her Bang! Pow! Boom! A nice buxom, hourglass body.
[09:42] Gengai
    What do you mean, sell her?! Etsuko-chan will be my own personal, gentle maid!
[09:46] Kagura
    Shut up, four-eyes! I'll send you to hell first!
[09:50] Shinpachi
    She definitely needs a maid's outfit!
[09:52] Kagura
    Attach an egg cracker! One that also takes out the slimy part!
[09:56] Gengai
    I don't get it.
[09:57] Shinpachi/Kagura
    That's not right!
[09:59] ---
    You wanna fight?
[09:59] Gintoki
    Never mind, just make her into your idea of a nice woman.
[10:00] ---
    Bring it on!
[10:01] ---
    Dirty specs!
[10:03] Gintoki
    You just made her bum bigger.
[10:06] Gintoki
    You didn't fix the parts that were basically wrong!
[10:08] Gintoki
    What is this thing you have for her bum?!
[10:10] Gengai
    Women with big bums are good-they have easier deliveries.
[10:13] Gintoki
    That's old! So ancient! Your criteria for choosing a woman are so old!
[10:15] Gengai
    What don't you like? I had a tough time with this part.
[10:20] Gengai
    It pours soy sauce.
[10:21] Gintoki
    I don't care about your consideration for eggs on rice!
[10:24] ---
    Why do you people like egg on rice so much?! Though I like it, too!
SIGN    [Note: Japanese people often eat rice mixed with raw egg and a little soy sauce drizzled on top.]
[10:28] Gengai
    You guys make a lot of demands.
[10:30] Gengai
    If you want more done, you'll need to pay me more money.
[10:35] Gengai
    Do you guys have the money?
SIGN    [Strawberry Fields]
[10:42] Shinpachi
    She's like an abandoned puppy.
[10:44] Gintoki
    Can't be helped. We don't have the money.
[10:47] Gintoki
    We can't sell her like this. I feel like a killer.
[10:50] Kagura
    Not only can't we sell her, but without a body, we can't use her as a maid.
[10:53] Shinpachi
    But according to Gengai-san, this robot ...
[10:56] Shinpachi
    was specially designed for office tasks.
[10:59] Shinpachi
    Her previous owner may have been using her more like a computer rather than as a maid.
[11:03] Gintoki
    Where's the on switch?
[11:05] Gintoki
    If it's her nipples, it's hopeless. We won't be able to boot her up.
[11:08] Shinpachi
    Your head is what's hopeless.
[11:10] Kagura
    Hey, wake up!
[11:12] Shinpachi
    Ack!
[11:13] Shinpachi
    Could it be this mole on her head?
[11:24] Kagura
    She turned on?!
[11:25] Fuyo
    Unfortunately, your adventures 1, 2 and 3 have disappeared.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of saved file for Dragon Quest game.]
[11:30] Gintoki
    Hey, this isn't good. We hit her too hard-the adventures have disappeared.
[11:34] Shinpachi
    What are the adventures?
[11:36] Kagura
    She went adventuring somewhere, no doubt.
[11:39] Fuyo
    Please rebuild the adventures from the beginning. First: A name.
[11:44] Shinpachi
    It's asking for a name.
[11:46] Gintoki
    It's a hassle, so just say, "Aaaa."
[11:48] Fuyo
    That won't do. You'll regret it later if you're lazy.
[11:51] Fuyo
    Where's the excitement if you say "Aaaa" when you're fighting the evil king.
[11:54] Gintoki
    What's an evil king? She intends to fight an evil king.
[11:56] Kagura
    Okay, then "Tama."
SIGN    [Note: Tama is short for tamago (egg).]
[11:58] Fuyo
    Roger.
[11:58] Shinpachi
    Tama?! How far are you going with this egg thing?!
[12:00] Gintoki
    That sounds like a stray dog.
[12:03] Fuyo
    How do you do, everyone. My name is Marie Antoinette.
[12:07] Shinpachi
    She ignored Tama! She didn't like it! She didn't like it!
[12:10] Fuyo
    Everyone calls me "Mole Beam."
[12:12] Shinpachi
    She was teased! She was totally teased about the mole on her forehead!
[12:16] Gintoki
    Who's "everyone"?
[12:17] Kagura
    Warriors and martial artists. They're physical, but very gloomy.
SIGN    [Note: Party member types from Dragon Quest game.]
[12:21] Fuyo
    The memories make me blue. Shall I save the adventure?
[12:26] Shinpachi
    She's trying to end the adventure on her own!
[12:28] Gintoki
    Wait! This adventure is just beginning!
[12:31] Fuyo
    Please write down the restart chant.
[12:33] ---
    Mogagazuboroso, kusaremagurobaromi.
[12:36] Gintoki
    A password, in this day and age?!
[12:38] ---
    Notepad! Hurry and get a notepad!
[12:39] Fuyo
    Putsun.
[12:42] Gintoki/Sss/Kagura
    Ack!
[12:43] Kagura
    She turned herself off!
[12:44] Shinpachi
    What did she say her password was?
[12:46] Gintoki
    Kusarimaguro something or other...
[12:48] ---
    Why is there no save function when the adventure turns off?
[12:51] ---
    She's faking it. She just doesn't want to do any work.
[12:55] Gintoki
    Hey! Wake up, dummy!
[12:56] ---
    Stop sleeping, you rotten tuna! You deserve to get shot 16 times, dummy!
[13:00] Gintoki
    Hey! She spat oil on her master!
[13:03] Gintoki
    Who do you think you are?!
[13:05] Fuyo
    Please do not touch the controller and power button during a save.
[13:09] Fuyo
    It may cause damage.
[13:10] Gintoki
    You don't have a save function!
[13:12] Fuyo
    I will repeat the restart chant.
[13:15] Gintoki
    Hey! It doesn't want to be restarted!
[13:17] Gintoki
    She's using some strange ancient characters!
[13:20] Fuyo
    Putsun.
[13:21] Gintoki
    Wait! Hey!
[13:22] Gintoki
    Cut that out, you!
[13:25] Kagura
    She's totally busted.
[13:29] Gintoki
    You just need to blow into the cartridge.
[13:33] Gintoki
    The adventure never got far, so what we have to do is start from the beginning.
[13:37] Gintoki
    It'll be troublesome, but let's be patient.
[13:40] Fuyo
    Parararappappaa!
[13:42] ---
    Tama has gone up a level.
SIGN    [Note: Level up sound from Dragon Quest game.]
[13:44] Shinpachi
    I don't know what's going on, but she's gone up a level!
[13:46] Fuyo
    Strength: up 3. Speed: up 2. Lassitude: up 5.
[13:51] Fuyo
    Lethargy: up 6. Exhaustion: up 7. I am feeling empty.
[13:55] Shinpachi
    Just a minute! Our chances of losing are rising!
[13:58] Fuyo
    Lethargy rising 2...zuborokusaremagurobaromi...
[14:01] Shinpachi
    She forced herself into the restart chant!
[14:03] ---
    I feel weak. I don't want to move. It's difficult to work.
[14:06] ---
    Along the way, it's become nothing but gripes!
[14:07] ---
    Putsun.
[14:10] Gintoki
    This is hopeless. Doesn't look like she'll make us any money at all.
[14:14] Male Announcer
    Announcer Ketsuno, are you there at the scene? Ketsuno? Ana?
[14:16] Ketsuno Announcer
    Yes, this is Ketsuno...Ana, at the scene.
[14:18] Ketsuno Announcer
    I'm reporting from in front of the Hayashi Research Institute, where the incident occurred.
[14:18] Gintoki
    It's Announcer Ketsuno. She's back.
[14:20] Kagura
    Tsk, like a boomerang.
[14:22] Shinpachi
    Huh?
[14:22] Ketsuno Announcer
    The murdered victim, Dr. Ryuzan Hayashi, was known as an authority on automatons.
[14:23] Shinpachi
    That's the lab that created Tama-san.
[14:27] Ketsuno Announcer
    He was the developer of the robot maid, Etsuko-chan.
SIGN    [Murdered: Dr. Ryuzan Hayashi]
[14:32] ---
    That's...
[14:33] Ketsuno Announcer
    Based on eyewitness reports, the Magistrate's Office is...
[14:36] Ketsuno Announcer
    searching for Fuyo No. i-Zero, an automaton that worked as the doctor's assistant, on suspicion of murder.
[14:44] Ketsuno Announcer
    At the present time, Fuyo No. i-Zero is a fugitive.
[14:47] Ketsuno Announcer
    Eyewitnesses should contact the Magistrate's Office immediately. I repeat...
[14:51] Shinpachi
    Could this be...?
[14:54] Shinpachi
    Tama-san?!
[14:58] Shinpachi
    There's no mistake! The robot that's suspected of murder...
[15:02] Shinpachi
    is our Tama-san! Though she's only a head now.
[15:05] Shinpachi
    And this Dr. Hayashi-he's the man who built Tama-san and the other robot maids!
[15:09] Gintoki
    She killed the parent who gave her life...and showed up here?
[15:15] Gintoki
    That can't be!
[15:17] Gintoki
    This piece of junk could never do something as mysterious as being involved in a murder case!
[15:21] Gintoki
    We're talking about a robot!
[15:23] Gintoki
    There are others that have the same face.
[15:25] Gintoki
    She's only a head-how could she commit murder?!
[15:28] Fuyo
    There is the possibility that I was destroyed by someone while on the run and became just a head.
[15:33] Fuyo
    Unfortunately, I have lost most of my memory of what happened before I became just a head.
[15:38] ---
    However, I am the No. i-Zero model.
[15:41] Gintoki
    She restarted without the restart chant.
[15:44] Fuyo
    Forgive me after earlier. I had an initialization issue. I am now restored.
[15:50] Gintoki
    You talked a lot of chop-logic, but in essence,
[15:54] Gintoki
    what you're trying to say is, that you're the murderer?
[15:56] Fuyo
    No. I do not have any recollection, so I am simply stating my opinion based on the data.
[16:01] Gintoki
    I'm asking you: did you kill him, or did you not?
[16:03] Gintoki
    If you don't know, then check your data further.
[16:05] Gintoki
    You can't find it because you assumed at the start that it wasn't there.
[16:08] Gintoki
    It might be closer than you think.
[16:10] Fuyo
    Understood. Searching.
[16:13] Fuyo
    Tama has checked the data. Of all things, I have found horse shit.
SIGN    [Note: Spoof of Dragon Quest game.]
[16:17] Gintoki
    Hey, you want to be sold off to GEO?
SIGN    [Note: GEO is a Japanese rental video/game store that also buys used games.]
[16:19] Fuyo
    She's not fixed at all. Initialization issues? She's got the mother of all issues!
[16:24] Fuyo
    Forgive me. Is there a mechanical engineer in the vicinity?
[16:28] Gintoki
    Huh?
[16:29] Fuyo
    I possess a backup memory area in case of an emergency,
[16:32] Fuyo
    but it is tightly secured...
[16:34] Fuyo
    If it can be opened, my memory could be restored.
[16:37] Gintoki
    I'm not sure I understand...
[16:39] Kagura
    For now, we can bring her back to old man Gengai, uh-huh.
[16:43] Shinpachi
    But...
[16:44] Shinpachi
    What if she gets her memory back...and it turns out she's really the killer?
[16:49] Gintoki
    Don't assume that. We don't know that yet.
[16:55] Maid A
    Excuse me.
[16:57] Maid A
    We're from the Magistrate's Office.
[17:00] Maid A
    Could we ask your help with an investigation?
[17:03] Maid A
    We received word from the neighbors that there is a suspicious robot here.
[17:08] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!
[17:09] ---
    It's too soon! Too soon to assume!
[17:11] Gintoki
    Don't give me that!
[17:12] Gintoki
    At this rate, we'll be murder suspects, too! Let me go! Get rid of her now!
[17:15] Fuyo
    This apparatus carries a curse. You cannot discard it.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Dragon Quest game.]
[17:18] Gintoki
    Don't tell me I can't discard it! I never recalled getting you in the first place!
[17:21] Fuyo
    To remove this apparatus,
[17:24] Fuyo
    either go to your nearest church or withdraw 3 million yen from an ATM and deposit it to my account.
[17:27] Gintoki/Shinpachi
    What kind of way is that to lift a curse?!
[17:29] Maid A
    Excuse me.
[17:31] Shinpachi
    If we keep this up, they'll become suspicious of us!
[17:33] Shinpachi
    I'll deal with them, while you hide her!
[17:35] Fuyo
    Please wait.
[17:37] Fuyo
    I do not detect life signs...
[17:40] Fuyo
    in two of the three visitors. They are not officials.
[17:49] Fuyo
    They are not even human.
[17:56] Maid A
    There's no one here.
[17:58] Meguro
    Are they on to us?
[18:00] Shinpachi
    Hey! Who were those people?! The house is ruined!
[18:04] Shinpachi
    How many times is our foyer going to be destroyed?!
[18:06] Gintoki
    Hey, what's the big idea? Let go of my arm already.
[18:09] ---
    They came after you. Are you going to get us involved, too? Hey, answer me.
[18:15] Fuyo
    I have no answer... I am like a mere corpse...
SIGN    [Note: The response given when speaking to a corpse in Dragon Quest game.]
[18:17] Gintoki
    Zaoriku.
SIGN    [Note: Name of a powerful revival spell in Dragon Quest game.]
[18:18] Fuyo
    Ow, ow, ow! I'm restored. I'm restored.
[18:21] Gintoki
    I'm telling you to let go. You'd curse the hand that repaired you?
[18:25] Fuyo
    I cannot do anything as just a head.
[18:27] Fuyo
    Please at least take me to a mechanic.
[18:30] Fuyo
    And, I think you'd best concentrate on making your escape.
[18:33] Fuyo
    But you won't reach a higher level if all you do is run.
[18:36] Fuyo
    Don't forget to arm yourself. Simply holding me does not mean you're armed.
[18:42] Gintoki
    Let go! Apparatus!
[18:46] Kagura
    Gin-chan!
[18:47] Kagura
    There!
[18:49] Gintoki
    What the hell is that? That maid... What power!
[18:53] Maid A
    Found you! Mole Beam!
[18:56] Maid A
    Time to clean house!
[18:56] Gintoki
    Whoa! I can see her panties! Your panties!
[19:02] Gintoki
    Wh-Wha-What?! Monster!
[19:04] Fuyo
    Fuyo No. 2-305.
[19:06] Fuyo
    The newest model robot maid developed by the Fuyo Project.
SIGN    [Note: "Fuyo" written differently, but pronounced identically, can mean "unnecessary" or "useless."]
[19:10] Gintoki
    That's no maid! That's a weapon! A weapon!
[19:13] Fuyo
    A.K.A. Kurin-chan. She's specially designed for cleaning.
[19:16] Fuyo
    She's fastidious to the point of paranoia
[19:18] Fuyo
    and is a defective model returned by consumers for being troublesome.
[19:22] Shinpachi
    You don't have your memory, so why is it you remember things about her?
[19:25] Fuyo
    She currently works at the laboratory as part of the janitorial staff.
[19:28] Fuyo
    She is an idiot who has tried many times
[19:30] Fuyo
    to remove the mole on my forehead because she mistakes it for rubbish.
[19:32] Shinpachi
    She's Mole Beam's bully!
[19:34] Shinpachi
    She's the girl who teased Tama-san by calling her Mole Beam!
[19:37] Gintoki
    What...
[19:38] Gintoki
    ...ever!
[19:39] Fuyo
    Throwing out the trash is not the only job of the janitorial staff.
[19:43] Maid A
    My, what a filthy truck.
[19:48] Fuyo
    In other words,
[19:49] Fuyo
    they eliminate anything that gets in the way of the Fuyo Project, leaving not even a speck of dust behind.
[19:54] Fuyo
    They are steel-cold assassins.
[19:57] Shinpachi
    What? You mean...
[19:58] ---
    Tama-san, you're being targeted by your friends...from the laboratory?
[20:01] Shinpachi
    Why... Are you and the Doctor in...
[20:07] Gintoki
    'Pachi-san, now's not the time for that.
[20:11] Gintoki
    You do realize...
[20:13] Gintoki
    at this rate, we'll be...
[20:15] Gintoki
    sent to hell by...
[20:18] Gintoki
    those maids.
[20:20] Shinpachi
    M-Maids...
[20:22] Gintoki
    What a spectacular sight.
[20:23] Gintoki
    A sight that'd make any fetishist cry tears of joy.
[20:25] Shinpachi
    You don't have to be a fetishist to cry...
[20:28] ---
    What'll we do?
[20:31] Maid A
    Hand over Mole Beam to us. We will dispose of her.
[20:36] Maid A
    Hand her over without a struggle!
[20:40] Maid A
    We will not harm you. This does not concern you.
[20:43] Gintoki
    How can you say that when you've already gotten so many people involved!
[20:47] Kagura
    We don't believe you, dummies!
[20:48] ---
    If we hand her over, you'll attack us all at once!
[20:50] Fuyo
    You're in danger. Never mind me. Do as they say.
[20:55] Fuyo
    Let go of me.
[20:56] Gintoki
    You let go!
[20:58] Maid A
    Mole Beam. Where did you put it?
[21:01] Maid A
    We know you stole it from Dr. Hayashi.
[21:04] Fuyo
    What're you talking about? Horse shit?
[21:06] Gintoki
    You know that's not it!
[21:08] Maid A
    You can't play dumb. You killed Dr. Hayashi to obtain it.
[21:13] Maid A
    The Fuyo Project will only achieve success when we have it.
[21:17] Maid A
    It is meaningless for an old model like you to have it.
[21:21] Maid A
    He will make it happen.
[21:25] Maid A
    And then robots will become equal to gods.
[21:30] Fuyo
    What're you...!
[21:36] Hayashi
    Oh... I want to become a robot.
[21:39] Fuyo
    Doctor, why do you say such a thing?
[21:43] Fuyo (M)
    Why are you suffering so?
[21:46] ---
    Why are you so sad?
[21:50] Fuyo (M)
    I don't understand. I don't...understand.
SIGN    [I'm only a robot-I don't understand.]
[21:54] Fuyo (M)
    I'm only a robot-I don't understand.
[22:03] Gintoki
    You're...
[22:04] Shinpachi
    A robot shedding tears...how is that possible?!
[22:07] Maid A
    You did have it, after all.
[22:09] Maid A
    A robot could never shed those droplets.
[22:12] Maid A
    It's proof without a doubt.
[22:15] Maid A
    Hand it over! To us!
[22:19] Maid A
    Stop...
[22:20] Maid A
    interfering!
[22:24] Shinpachi
    Gin-san!
[22:25] Gintoki
    Shinpachi! Jump!
[22:38] Gintoki
    Shinpachi!
[22:40] Gintoki
    Take her to old man Gengai's place! Hurry!
[22:42] Shinpachi
    But...!
[22:43] Gintoki
    I'll join you later!
[22:45] ---
    Get going!
SIGN    [To be continued]
SIGN    [Next episode: "Too Many Cuties Can Make You Sick."]
SIGN    [The maid robot army attacks! Can the Odd Jobs escape?!]
SIGN    [What is the "Fuyo Project"?! What is the reason for Tama-san's tears?!]