E164 - "That Matsutake Soup Stuff Tastes Better Than The Real Deal" & "If a person is dead, they can't come back to life"

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:35] Gintoki
    Why do I have to wander around town
    to the point where I'm starving?
[01:40] Gintoki
    Stupid Kagura...
[01:42] Kagura
    How can you let a growing girl go three
    days on less than four pints of rice?!
[01:47] Kagura
    Why don't we have any work?
[01:49] Kagura
    We wouldn't have to go hungry
    if you worked every day!
[01:53] Kagura
    Go find work right now!
[01:56] Kagura
    I won't let you inside the house
    until you've found a job!
[01:59] Gintoki
    Easy for you to say.
[02:01] Gintoki
    We're in a global recession, you know.
[02:04] Gintoki
    It's not my fault that I can't find any work.
[02:07] Gintoki
    And she eats way too much.
[02:09] Hasegawa
    Hey, Gin-san!
[02:10] Gintoki
    It's you.
[02:12] Hasegawa
    Man, that's pretty impressive.
[02:13] Hasegawa
    Like you can pull it off when
    you put your mind to it?
[02:15] ---
    Huh?
[02:16] Hasegawa
    To be honest, I'm in a tight
    situation right now.
[02:18] Hasegawa
    So how about it?
[02:19] Hasegawa
    Give me a little assistance or charity?
[02:23] Gintoki
    Huh?
[02:25] Hasegawa
    Stop trying to dodge the question!
[02:27] Hasegawa
    You don't have to act like you're all that
[02:28] Hasegawa
    because you're raking it in, Gin-san!
[02:31] Gintoki
    Huh?!
[02:32] Gintoki
    What are you even talking about?
[02:33] Gintoki
    When did I start raking it in?!
[02:35] Hasegawa
    Don't play dumb!
[02:37] Hasegawa
    I was at Hello Work when
    I heard the crazy rumors!
SIGN    [Note: Hello Work is a Japanese unemployment office.]
[02:40] Hasegawa
    Odd Jobs is red-hot!
[02:43] Hasegawa
    They're talking about how you're
    fast, cheap, and nice!
[02:44] Hasegawa
    And cool to boot!
[02:48] Gintoki
    What?!
[02:50] Gintoki
    What's this?
[02:51] Gintoki
    Odd Jobs...Kingon?
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Odd Jobs Gin. Gin (silver) was changed to Kin (gold).]
SIGN    ["That Matsutake Soup Stuff Tastes Better Than The Real Deal"]
SIGN    [Note: Matsutake is a popular and expensive mushroom
    in Japan. The soup is a cheap dried powder version.]
[03:02] Shinpachi
    Who are these people?!
[03:04] Shinpachi
    What's with their similar name?!
[03:06] Shinpachi
    What is this?!
[03:07] Shinpachi
    They're interfering with our business!
[03:09] Kagura
    It's their fault that I've eaten less than
    four pints of rice over the past week!
[03:13] Gintoki
    Still...
[03:15] Gintoki
    They're more popular,
[03:17] Gintoki
    so we can't really do anything about it.
[03:19] Shinpachi
    Is it okay for the original
    to lose to the copycat?!
[03:21] Shinpachi
    At this rate, they'll be considered
    the real ones!
[03:25] Shinpachi
    We'll be buried in the annals of history!
[03:27] Shinpachi
    Are you okay with that?!
[03:29] Gintoki
    Isn't that how history works?
[03:32] Gintoki
    These days, nobody cares about
    where something originated.
[03:35] Shinpachi
    What are you talking about?!
[03:37] Shinpachi
    We cannot accept such dark history!
[03:42] Kagura
    Besides, it was Gin-chan's original idea to
    use this particular incarnation of Odd Jobs.
[03:48] Kagura
    This would be a big deal if
    it was the Mouse Kingdom!
SIGN    [Note: Mouse Kingdom refers to Disneyland and the strict Disney copyright.]
[03:51] Shinpachi
    This must be it.
[04:03] Kagura
    They look kinda cool.
[04:05] Shinpachi
    They're pretending to be celebrities.
[04:07] Shinpachi
    Leader, captain, support, mascot?
SIGN    [Note: Equivalent to the roles Gintoki, Kagura, Shinpachi and Sadaharu fill.]
[04:12] Shinpachi
    Leader.
[04:13] Shinpachi
    Name and age are a secret.
[04:14] Shinpachi
    Sorry.
[04:15] Shinpachi
    Height: Around 180 cm.
[04:17] Shinpachi
    Weight: Never ask a guy his weight.
[04:19] Shinpachi
    Hobby: To become the wind.
[04:20] Shinpachi
    Special talent: Abacus, third level.
[04:23] Shinpachi
    I can touch my nose with
    tip of my tongue.
[04:25] Shinpachi
    What? That's creepy.
[04:26] Kagura
    Check the captain.
[04:29] Kagura
    I'm the captain.
[04:31] Kagura
    My height and weight are like a model's.
[04:33] Kagura
    Like, duh, of course.
[04:36] Kagura
    Hobby: Like, being all popular
    and loved and stuff?
[04:39] Kagura
    Special talent: Like, duh, I have talents?
[04:43] Kagura
    This cell phone novel-like
    text is pissing me off!
SIGN    [Note: Cell phone novels are written in text messages
    by young Japanese girls. They often speak in slang.]
[04:46] Shinpachi
    They even have a blog.
[04:50] Shinpachi
    Let's talk about what really happens
    every now and then.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of #138 title, "Why Not Talk About the Old Days for a Change?"]
[04:53] Shinpachi
    X month, X day.
[04:55] Shinpachi
    A sudden job led to a
    surprising encounter.
[04:57] Shinpachi
    Can't reveal the name, but
    it was someone famous.
[04:59] Shinpachi
    Once we heard the circumstances, we
    were determined to accept the job.
[05:02] Shinpachi
    We're grateful for the opportunity
    to meet this person.
[05:06] Shinpachi
    X month, X day.
[05:07] Shinpachi
    We had to go overseas rather
    suddenly for that previous job.
[05:10] Shinpachi
    We're grateful to the members
    of the staff.
[05:15] Shinpachi
    X month, X day.
[05:16] Shinpachi
    Problem solved.
[05:17] Shinpachi
    The client gave us champagne
    as a thank you gift.
[05:18] Shinpachi
    We're grateful for the heartwarming
    comments.
[05:20] Shinpachi
    What's with all the self-adoration here?
[05:23] Shinpachi
    Isn't this person a little confused?
[05:25] Shinpachi
    Our Odd Jobs range from cleaning
    gutters to looking for lost kittens.
[05:29] Shinpachi
    Or helping old ladies with their shopping.
[05:30] Shinpachi
    It's honest work.
[05:32] Shinpachi
    All behind the scenes.
[05:33] Kagura
    This person's pretending
    to be a celebrity!
[05:35] Shinpachi
    I can't forgive such an act!
[05:37] Shinpachi
    I'm going to find these people
    who have no shame!
[05:41] Shinpachi
    The fakes' office is up ahead.
[05:44] Girl
    I'm so glad we went to the Odd Jobs.
[05:47] Guy
    Told you so.
[05:49] Guy
    Nothing to worry about if we
    let Odd Jobs handle it.
[05:51] Girl
    And we even got this beautiful vase.
SIGN    [Note: It's a common scam trick in Japan to sell a vase to a troubled person saying it will change their luck.]
[05:54] Guy
    And your fate is no longer
    tied my ancestors.
SIGN    [Note: STEP=Society for Testing English Proficiency.]
[05:57] Girl
    And I can easily pass
    the 4th grade STEP.
[05:59] Girl
    And it only cost half a year's salary.
[06:02] Gintoki
    H-H-H-Half a year?!
[06:05] Shinpachi
    No, that's not what you should
    be excited about.
[06:08] Kagura
    People that stupid can still
    be in a relationship?!
[06:12] Shinpachi
    No, that's not it either.
[06:16] Shinpachi
    That's an expensive-looking
    office building.
[06:18] Kagura
    They must be raking in the cash
    with their fishy business.
[06:21] Gintoki
    Shinpachi... Kagura...
[06:25] Gintoki
    We're taking them down.
[06:26] Shinpachi
    We can't allow these imposters
    to have their way.
[06:29] Kagura
    Time to lay the smackdown.
[06:31] Gintoki
    Let's go!
[06:37] Gintoki
    They're on the second floor!
[06:39] Gintoki
    Let's see what these fakes look like!
[06:47] Shinpachi
    K-Kanemaru-kun!
SIGN    [Note: Old Odd Jobs member from Ep. 138]
[06:50] Kagura
    Ikezawa!
SIGN    [Note: Old Odd Jobs member from Ep. 138]
SIGN    
SIGN    [Note: "Leader" is Stainless Boy. A Parody of Crystal
    Boy from Cobra, a Shonen Jump manga from the 80s.]
[07:04] Gintoki
    Who are you?
SIGN    [The End]
[07:10] Shinpachi
    Gin-san. Kagura-chan.
[07:12] Shinpachi
    Listen to this!
[07:13] Shinpachi
    I was walking along,
[07:15] Shinpachi
    when these high school girls looked
    at my face and laughed!
[07:17] Shinpachi
    Is there something funny
    about my face?!
[07:19] Shinpachi
    Is it strange?!
[07:20] Shinpachi
    Is there something on my face?!
[07:21] Shinpachi
    Don't you think it's rude to laugh?!
[07:28] Shinpachi
    Gin-san?
[07:31] Shinpachi
    Kagura-chan?
[07:38] Shinpachi
    Man, where did they run off to?
[07:47] Shinpachi
    What? They're in there, huh?
[07:57] Blue
    H-Hey, big guy.
[07:58] Blue
    Can you pull my arm?
[08:00] Blue
    I'm stuck.
[08:02] Blue
    I'm telling you to pull my arm.
[08:04] Blue
    Hurry it up.
[08:05] Shinpachi
    Ah, yes!
[08:06] Blue
    Ow! Ow! Ow!
[08:08] Blue
    That hurts, you damn fool!
[08:10] Blue
    Forget it.
[08:11] Blue
    I'll get out by myself.
SIGN    
[08:14] Blue
    Young people these days don't even know
    how to pull someone out of a desk.
[08:19] Shinpachi
    Uh? How to pull someone out of a desk?
[08:23] Shinpachi
    No. Most people wouldn't
    know how to do that.
[08:26] Blue
    Get me some tea, big guy.
[08:28] Shinpachi
    Huh?
[08:29] Blue
    I'm telling you to get me some tea!
[08:31] Blue
    This place doesn't provide its
    guests with any service?
[08:33] Shinpachi
    Ah, right away.
[08:49] Shinpachi
    Who is that?
SIGN    ["People Who Die Stay Dead"]
[09:02] Blue
    What's that?
[09:03] Blue
    Some high school girls said you
    were gross and disgusting?
[09:06] Shinpachi
    No, it wasn't that bad.
[09:08] Shinpachi
    They were just laughing at me...
[09:10] Shinpachi
    Though on second thought, it could
    have been in a good way.
[09:13] Shinpachi
    Like, "Oh, He's so cute! Whee!"
[09:16] Blue
    Are you a moron?
[09:18] Shinpachi
    A moron?
[09:19] Blue
    Like hell that would happen.
[09:21] Blue
    Keep your eyes wide open
    and look straight ahead.
[09:23] Blue
    In what universe would any high school girls
    laugh at you in such a romantic way?
[09:28] Blue
    You're deluding yourself.
[09:29] Blue
    Gross! Disgusting! Four-eyes!
[09:31] Shinpachi
    Why do I have to be insulted
    for my glasses?
[09:34] Shinpachi
    Uh, can I ask something?
[09:37] Blue
    What's up?
[09:38] Shinpachi
    Who are you?
[09:41] Blue
    Me?
[09:42] Blue
    I'm a robot from the future.
[09:44] Shinpachi
    A robot?!
[09:45] Blue
    You're going to have a sad and sorry future
    at this rate, so I came to help ya.
[09:53] Shinpachi
    I'll ask just because I have a feeling the conversation
    would end if I just accepted that,
[09:58] Shinpachi
    but what does this sad
    and sorry future entail?
[10:00] Blue
    A sad and sorry future would
    be sad and sorry.
[10:03] Blue
    Yeah...
[10:04] Blue
    You're wearing glasses, which means
    your eyes are bad, right?
[10:08] Shinpachi
    Well, yeah...
[10:10] Blue
    Plus, you don't know how to be
    considerate and fail at sports.
[10:13] Blue
    Most people with those
    circumstances have bad luck.
[10:16] Blue
    No looks, no brains, no luck.
[10:17] Blue
    Sad and sorry enough as
    it is, but if it gets worse...
[10:22] Blue
    I can't bear to tell you.
[10:25] Blue
    So one of your descendants
    ordered me to help you out.
[10:31] Blue
    Which is why I'm here when
    I didn't really want to come.
[10:38] Blue
    By the way, big guy.
[10:40] Blue
    You're not being considerate enough.
[10:42] Shinpachi
    What do you mean?
[10:43] Blue
    This right here!
[10:44] Blue
    I ask for some tea and
    that's all you bring?
[10:46] Blue
    You're supposed to offer a snack, too.
[10:49] Blue
    Yeah, you know what I mean?
[10:51] Blue
    The one with red bean sandwiched between
    two spongy pancake-like things?
[10:59] Blue
    In any case,
[11:00] Blue
    bring me some damn dorayaki!
SIGN    [Note: Dorayaki is Doraemon's favorite food.]
[11:05] Shinpachi
    Ah, he said it.
[11:07] Shinpachi
    Here you are.
[11:07] Blue
    This is what I'm talking about!
[11:17] Shinpachi
    U-Uh...
[11:19] Blue
    What's up?
[11:19] Shinpachi
    If I have descendants...
[11:22] Shinpachi
    That would mean I got married
    and had kids, right?
[11:25] Shinpachi
    So...
[11:27] Shinpachi
    Who do I marry?
[11:29] Blue
    Oh, knew it! Knew it! Knew it!
[11:36] Blue
    I knew you'd be asking me that.
[11:40] Blue
    I knew it was coming.
[11:42] Blue
    Big guy's a real...dirty...man.
[11:49] Blue
    Man, I can't get over how young people
    these days don't have any patience.
[11:56] Blue
    Look here.
[11:57] Blue
    It'd be simple for me to
    give you the answer.
[12:00] Blue
    But you know what?
[12:01] Blue
    That would make you give
    up on thinking for yourself.
[12:05] Blue
    You okay with that?
[12:08] Shinpachi
    Aren't you just saying that
    because you don't know?
[12:12] Blue
    Looks like I'll have to explain
    this to you, big guy.
[12:14] Shinpachi
    E-Explain what?
[12:36] Blue
    Under normal circumstances,
[12:37] Blue
    you would hesitate and wonder about
    whether you really liked that girl.
[12:40] Blue
    A man betters himself through the effort of
    establishing and maintaining a relationship.
[12:44] Blue
    You could even say that love only
    lasts because of constant growth.
[12:49] Blue
    If I give you the answer now,
[12:51] Blue
    you'll believe that you can marry
    that girl without doing anything.
[12:56] Blue
    And then you'll just lounge
    around your entire life
[12:59] Blue
    without putting in any effort or
    taking any risks, dumbass.
[13:05] Blue
    Which is why I won't tell you.
[13:07] Blue
    I'm not being mean.
[13:11] Shinpachi
    Forgive me, Nekoemon-san.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon. "Neko" means "cat".]
[13:13] Blue
    Who are you calling Nekoemon?!
[13:15] Shinpachi
    Huh?! Didn't you come from
    the future to help me out?
[13:19] Blue
    People even treat me like
    a Buddha or a god.
[13:23] Blue
    But I can't stand cats.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's fear of mice.]
[13:24] Blue
    I absolutely despise them!
[13:26] Blue
    The sound they make gives me shivers.
[13:30] Blue
    Look here.
[13:32] Blue
    These ears were bitten by a cat.
[13:35] Shinpachi
    Huh? Not by a mouse?!
SIGN    [Note: In the story, Doraemon's ears were bitten off by a mouse.]
[13:36] Blue
    I said a cat did it!
[13:38] Shinpachi
    Ah, yes!
[13:39] Shinpachi
    Sorry.
[13:40] Shinpachi
    I thought you were someone who could pull
    tools out of the pocket on his stomach.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon. His pocket is filled with tools.]
[13:46] Blue
    Well, it's not that I can't.
[13:48] Shinpachi
    Huh? You can?
[13:50] Blue
    Of course. Who do you think I am?
[13:52] Shinpachi
    I-In that case...
[13:54] Shinpachi
    That thing that lets you
    fly through the sky!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Bamboo Copter.]
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Anywhere Door.]
[13:57] Shinpachi
    Or the door that lets you go anywhere!
[13:59] Shinpachi
    Or the flashlight that makes
    stuff big or small!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Small Light.]
[14:04] Blue
    Scary!
[14:06] Blue
    I'm scared, Mommy!
[14:07] Blue
    This person scares me!
[14:09] Blue
    He'll fly through the sky to
    peek on women bathing.
[14:12] Blue
    Once he can go anywhere, he'll
    sneak into a girls' locker room.
[14:16] Blue
    He'll become small so he can
    slide down a girl's cleavage.
[14:21] Blue
    Ah! I'm scared!
[14:23] Blue
    This person's an animal!
[14:24] Blue
    A sex-craved beast! A sex beast!
[14:26] Shinpachi
    Why can you only come up
    with criminal actions?!
[14:29] Blue
    Huh?
[14:29] Blue
    Isn't that all there is?
[14:31] Shinpachi
    No!
[14:32] Shinpachi
    I would use them to improve myself!
[14:35] Blue
    Well, if that's the case, I
    guess I'll bring them out.
[14:39] Blue
    Bamboo-wing!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Bamboo Copter]
[14:41] Blue
    Go-anywhere sliding door!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Anywhere Door.]
[14:44] Blue
    Big and small light!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Doraemon's Small Light.]
[14:47] Shinpachi
    Uh.
[14:48] Shinpachi
    This is it?
[14:49] Blue
    Such a weak response!
[14:51] Blue
    So you think these look weak?
[14:53] Blue
    You probably think they're just toys.
[14:56] Shinpachi
    Well, kinda...
[14:58] Blue
    You'll be surprised when I use them.
[15:00] Shinpachi
    Really?
[15:01] Blue
    Give it a try if you don't believe me.
[15:05] Shinpachi
    How are you supposed to use this?
[15:07] Blue
    Just open it.
[15:09] Shinpachi
    Like this?
[15:17] Shinpachi
    Isn't this just a door with a piece
    of paper on the other side?!
[15:20] Blue
    Yeah, switch the paper and you
    can see anywhere you want.
[15:23] Shinpachi
    Huh?!
[15:24] Shinpachi
    And it's too small to go through!
[15:27] Blue
    Man, you just don't stop complaining.
[15:29] Blue
    You should learn to be satisfied
    with what you have.
[15:31] Shinpachi
    How am I supposed to be satisfied by
    something a child could have made?!
[15:36] Blue
    What are you doing?!
[15:38] Shinpachi
    This is probably just a flashlight.
[15:51] Blue
    W-Wait, hold on.
[15:53] Blue
    There's a reason for this.
[15:55] Shinpachi
    Eh?
[15:56] Blue
    Please! Just listen to me!
[15:58] Blue
    Please!
[15:58] Blue
    You see, this is still a work-in-progress.
[16:01] Blue
    A prototype.
[16:02] Blue
    I'll bring a working one later
    so just use this for now.
[16:07] Shinpachi
    Well, it carries out the function
    of lighting up dark places.
[16:10] Blue
    Right? Right?
[16:11] Blue
    Very useful! Super useful!
[16:14] Blue
    Just think about it.
[16:16] Blue
    It's the middle of the night and you're
    going to buy one of those
SIGN    [Note: In Japan, racy magazines are often sold in vending machines.]
[16:18] Blue
    magazines you don't want other
    people to know about.
[17:05] Blue
    The flashlight helps you find the money you
    dropped so you can buy the magazine.
[17:12] Shinpachi
    Could you stop treating me
    like I'm in middle school?!
[17:17] Shinpachi
    I feel like an idiot for expecting anything.
[17:19] Blue
    What are you saying?!
[17:21] Blue
    Here! This is amazing!
[17:23] Blue
    It's the real thing!
[17:24] Blue
    You can fly if you stick this on your head!
[17:27] Shinpachi
    Really?
[17:28] Shinpachi
    Don't you mean that it can fly when
    it's not attached to anything else?
[17:33] Blue
    No way. It's the real deal.
[17:34] Blue
    You can actually fly.
[17:37] Shinpachi
    I just have to put this on my head, right?
[17:39] Blue
    Yeah...
[17:43] Blue
    It's just...that...
[17:52] Blue
    Don't say I didn't warn you.
[17:57] Shinpachi
    Hey.
[18:04] Shinpachi
    Uh, don't you have one that goes
    vertically instead of horizontally?
[18:09] Blue
    Oh, that.
[18:10] Blue
    I actually brought one.
[18:12] Blue
    Bamboo-wing: Vertical!
[18:15] Shinpachi
    Oh. You have one.
[18:19] Blue
    But I wouldn't recommend using it.
[18:25] Blue
    Ah, not again.
[18:26] Blue
    That old timer gave me another
    defective model.
[18:31] Blue
    So yeah...
[18:32] Blue
    This shows that you shouldn't
    rely on tools.
[18:34] Blue
    Isn't that great, big guy?
[18:35] Blue
    You've learned something.
[18:37] Shinpachi
    So what exactly are you
    going to do to help me?
[18:43] Blue
    Big guy...
[18:44] Blue
    You can't rely on others.
[18:47] Blue
    If you rely on me and my tools from the start,
    your future won't change a lick..
[18:54] Blue
    You see, big guy...
[18:56] Blue
    I'm essentially supposed to be with you.
[18:58] Blue
    I might bring out a tool to help you every
    once in a while or listen to you complain.
[19:03] Blue
    But for the most part, I don't
    intend to do anything.
[19:06] Blue
    Got it?
[19:07] Blue
    Kids are no longer curious
    or adventurous
[19:10] Blue
    because of the dragon that brings dead people
    back to life if you collect seven balls
SIGN    [Note: Refers to Dragon Ball.]
[19:14] Blue
    and the robot cat who pulls out tools
    when someone goes crying for help.
[19:20] Shinpachi
    Uh?
[19:21] Shinpachi
    Did you just deny your own existence?
[19:23] Blue
    I'm no cat.
[19:26] Blue
    And that's not the issue here.
[19:29] Blue
    People haven't realized this yet,
[19:30] Blue
    but the robot did more good when
    he was by the kid's side
[19:34] Blue
    than when he was using tools
    to solve his problems.
[19:38] Blue
    It wasn't a parent, sibling, or pet.
[19:41] Blue
    But it was someone the kid could talk
    to about anything, like a friend.
[19:45] Blue
    It was important to have someone who could
    accept all his flaws and weaknesses.
[19:53] Blue
    Do you have someone like that, big guy?
[20:03] Blue
    Right?
[20:04] Blue
    But you don't need to worry.
[20:08] Blue
    You and I are friends now.
[20:14] Blue
    Okay?
[20:18] Shinpachi
    Yes.
[20:34] Blue
    So let's start by switching
    that TV to a digital one.
[20:39] Shinpachi
    Oh, that.
[20:40] Shinpachi
    Are they really going to switch
    on July 24, 2011?
[20:44] Blue
    Well, in the end...
[20:46] Shinpachi
    What's wrong?
[20:49] Blue
    Not good.
[20:50] Blue
    We'll be overheard by Skynet.
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Terminator]
[20:52] Shinpachi
    Skynet?
[20:53] Shinpachi
    Don't you mean the Time Patrol?
SIGN    [Note: Refers to Time Patrol from Doraemon.]
[20:56] Blue
    You see...
[20:57] Blue
    Skynet is this computer developed
    by the military.
[21:05] Blue
    But at one point, it determined
    that humans were its enemy.
[21:10] Blue
    That was the beginning of a long
    war between robots and humans.
[21:28] Shinpachi
    Uh, I don't see where this is going.
[21:31] Blue
    Didn't I explain this in the beginning?
[21:33] Blue
    I came from the future because
    people were worried about you.
[21:36] Blue
    I can use tools to protect you.
[21:37] Blue
    But that's all.
[21:39] Shinpachi
    Uh, yeah...
[21:40] Blue
    I'm pretty sharp.
[21:44] Blue
    Lucky you, Connor!
SIGN    [Note: Parody of Terminator]
[21:50] Shinpachi
    Huh?
[21:52] Shinpachi
    Connor?
[21:57] Blue
    Connor!
[22:00] Shinpachi
    Connor?
[22:07] Blue
    Aren't you...Connor?
[22:12] Shinpachi
    I'm Shinpachi Shimura.
[22:33] Blue
    Sorry, I got the wrong guy.
[22:38] Shinpachi
    Huh? What...?
[24:15] Gintoki
    The next episode...
[24:16] Gintoki
    "If It Works Once, It'll Work
    Over And Over Again."
SIGN    [A new type of flu has hit Edo.]
SIGN    [Shinpachi keeps encountering bothersome individuals while caring for his sister.
SIGN    [See you next time.]