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E283 - Amen

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Snack Otose
SIGN    Tama's request: Please watch this program in a bright
    room and at a safe distance from your TV.
[01:32] T
    To err is human,
[01:35] T
    but so, too, is to repent for those mistakes
[01:37] T
    and learn from them.
[01:40] G
    Tama-chan!
[01:42] G
    I'll be frank and apologize.
[01:45] G
    Thanks for listening to my confession.
[01:47] T
    No problem. Take good care of your wife.
[01:50] G
    Hey, Yosaku!
[01:51] G
    If you're done, then scram already!
[01:52] G
    There's a line waiting here!
[01:54] G
    Tama-chan, listen to my confession next!
[01:57] G
    You just want to have a
    chat with her, don't you?
[01:59] G
    Like you're one to talk!
[02:03] Gin
    Hey, what's all this racket?
[02:06] Shin
    Is she giving consultations or something?
[02:08] Kag
    It looks more like a confessional booth.
[02:12] O
    She was only lending an ear
    to whining drunkards at first.
[02:16] O
    Perhaps they found it easier to
    spill the beans to a machine.
[02:20] O
    Now I don't know if this
    is a snack bar or a church.
[02:23] Shin
    But aren't you getting more
    customers thanks to that?
[02:26] O
    Nah, they're all more interested
    in confessing than drinking alcohol.
[02:30] G
    Tama-chan!
[02:31] G
    I hereby swear never to drink alcohol again!
[02:34] O
    We're even getting people like him.
[02:37] C
    Listen up, you louts!
[02:38] C
    This is a mecca for old men to partake
    in alcohol and wholesome debauchery.
[02:42] C
    If you're not interested in me,
    then get the hell outta here!
[02:47] C
    Tama-sama, being too risque
    is a sin too, isn't it?
[02:51] T
    Not to worry.
[02:52] T
    You aren't the least bit risque.
[02:54] T
    Just grotesque.
[02:55] C
    Who are you calling Dr. Gero?!
[02:56] C
    Want me to marry you off to Krillin,
    you damn artificial human?!
[03:00] O
    Well, I don't really mind, if being of
    help to people makes Tama happy.
[03:05] Gin
    That won't do, Gran.
[03:07] Gin
    I've heard your confession.
[03:09] Gin
    Leave your repentance to me.
SIGN    Amen
[03:20] T
    Um, Gintoki-sama...
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[03:22] T
    What is this?
[03:24] G
    Rejoice. You have your own shop now.
[03:27] G
    Listen to confessions here from now on.
SIGN    1000 yen per confession!!
SIGN    Would you like to repent for your sins?
SIGN    Complete privacy guaranteed. All confessions heard will be deleted from memory.
[03:29] T
    Are you telling me to turn it into a
    business? I can't take money for this.
[03:32] Gin
    No problem.
[03:33] Gin
    20% of the revenue will go to Gran as rent,
[03:36] Gin
    and 80% will go to me as
    compensation for my assistance.
[03:39] T
    Gintoki-sama, a different
    problem has popped up now.
[03:42] Gin
    Don't get the wrong idea.
[03:43] Gin
    I just want to help you fulfill your
    dream of being of use to humans.
[03:48] Gin
    With this, the people who confess
    to you will gain salvation.
[03:50] Gin
    And so will you, for being of use to them.
[03:53] Gin
    And lastly, so will my finances.
[03:55] Gin
    Everybody wins.
[03:57] T
    I think that last person is beyond salvation.
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[03:59] Gin
    Anyway, you simply have to do
    what you've always done here.
[04:02] T
    But...
[04:03] Gin
    Don't worry. If you run into trouble,
    I'll be standing by in back to help you.
[04:07] Gin
    So go break a leg.
[04:08] T
    O-Okay.
[04:11] Gin
    Who would've thought there was
    such a great way to make money?
[04:13] Gin
    I repent the fact
[04:14] Gin
    that I was running a worthless
    business like Odd Jobs until now.
[04:18] C
    Uh, excuse me.
[04:19] Gin
    Oh, someone's here already.
[04:20] C
    I'd like to remain anonymous, if possible.
[04:22] T
    Oh, rest assured.
[04:25] T
    Your face isn't visible from here,
[04:27] T
    and your voice has been altered
    using that special mic.
[04:29] C
    That's a relief.
[04:31] C
    In that case, could you
    listen to my confession?
[04:34] Gin
    He must be around fifteen or sixteen.
[04:36] Gin
    Teenage boys do worry about
    the most pointless things.
[04:40] C
    I've committed a huge sin.
[04:44] C
    I'm undergoing my apprenticeship
    at a certain place,
[04:47] C
    but the boss there is a piece of shit.
[04:49] Gin
    Yeah, that happens to everyone.
[04:52] C
    Even though he works me to death,
[04:54] C
    he doesn't pay me on time,
[04:55] C
    he's stingy, shady,
[04:57] C
    and his feet are stinky.
[04:58] Gin
    Yeah, that guy sounds pretty shitty.
[05:00] Gin
    Does someone that awful really exist?
[05:02] C
    So the other day, I got kinda mad
[05:05] C
    and threw the mop while cleaning his room,
[05:08] C
    only to have it hit one of his
    treasures and break it.
[05:11] C
    Lady Robokko,
[05:13] C
    will my sin be forgiven?
[05:17] T
    Gintoki-sama?
[05:18] Gin
    There's no need to apologize for that.
[05:20] Gin
    Such a piece of shit deserves
    to have all his stuff destroyed.
[05:26] T
    The heavens declare that you are blameless,
[05:30] T
    and that your shitty boss will
    be subject to divine punishment.
[05:33] C
    I see. That sounds about right.
[05:35] C
    I mean, he's always putting me through hell.
[05:38] C
    Then, as much as it hurts me to do this,
[05:40] C
    it's already broken, anyway.
[05:42] C
    Why would you buy the
    weather reporter's figurine?
[05:45] C
    For an adult, that's way too creepy!
[05:46] C
    Here's your divine punishment!
[05:48] C
    Thank you.
[05:50] C
    Amen.
[05:52] T
    Amen.
[05:54] Gin
    Uh, what is that?
[05:56] T
    Looks like a figurine of Ketsuno Ana.
[05:58] Gin
    Oh, is that so?
[06:00] Gin
    For such a shitty boss,
    he sure has good taste.
[06:03] Gin
    All right. Let's keep this up.
[06:05] T
    Okay.
[06:06] T
    Anybody else?
[06:09] C
    Um...
[06:10] C
    I came from space to marry
    into the human race,
[06:15] C
    but my husband's a runny piece of shit.
[06:17] C
    He doesn't work or provide for the family,
[06:20] C
    is stingy, shady, has stinky
    feet and stinky feces.
[06:23] Gin
    Hey, isn't she talking about
    the shitty boss from earlier?
[06:26] T
    No.
[06:27] T
    This one's not a piece of shit.
    He's a runny piece of shit.
[06:29] C
    So the other day, I got kinda mad
[06:31] C
    and tried to doodle on his
    face while he was asleep,
[06:34] C
    but then a mop came flying at me...
[06:35] Gin
    Isn't that the mop from earlier?
[06:37] Gin
    The piece of shit really was
    the runny piece of shit!
[06:39] C
    So I broke the mop in two,
[06:41] C
    only for one half to pierce his figurine,
[06:43] C
    and the other to pierce the
    runny piece of shit himself.
[06:46] Gin
    Huh? Is he all right?
[06:47] Gin
    Is the runny piece of shit still alive?
[06:48] C
    But he just kept sleeping,
    so I left him that way.
[06:51] Gin
    You don't think that's because
    he slipped into eternal sleep?!
[06:54] C
    Lady Robokko, will my sin be forgiven?
[06:58] T
    Isn't this murder?
[07:00] Gin
    Nope.
[07:01] Gin
    All she did was kick the feces
    lying on the street to the side.
[07:04] Gin
    I bet that's made Edo a little bit cleaner.
[07:08] T
    The heavens are overjoyed by your actions.
[07:11] T
    There's sure to be blessings headed your way.
[07:13] C
    Really?
[07:15] C
    The mop's still lodged in him.
    Is that really okay?
[07:17] Gin
    It's fine. Leave it stuck in him.
[07:20] Gin
    That's his cross
[07:23] Gin
    to bear.
[07:28] C
    That's a relief.
[07:29] C
    Amen.
[07:33] Gin
    Amen?
[07:35] T
    Gintoki-sama?
[07:37] T
    Gintoki-sama, are you all right?
[07:39] Gin
    Wh-What do you mean?
[07:41] Gin
    I'm perfectly fine!
[07:43] T
    Really?
[07:44] T
    What about the mop stuck to your backside?
[07:46] Gin
    Huh? Mop?
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[07:48] T
    Indeed. It was stuck there from
    the moment I met you today.
[07:51] Gin
    Is that so?
[07:52] T
    I figured I shouldn't stick my
    nose where it doesn't belong,
[07:55] T
    considering the mop was
    already stuck pretty deep.
[07:57] Gin
    Huh?
[07:58] Gin
    Oh, you mean this?
[08:00] Gin
    Rather than sticking into my
    butt, it was sticking out of it!
[08:04] Gin
    I mistook the mop for yakisoba
    yesterday and ate it, you see.
[08:07] T
    Really?
[08:09] Gin
    Really! Don't get the wrong idea!
[08:11] Gin
    It's got nothing to do with the mop
    mentioned in those confessions, okay?
[08:15] T
    I know that.
[08:18] Gin
    Yeah, they're not related at all.
[08:20] Gin
    Everybody loves Ketsuno Ana,
[08:22] Gin
    and I'm sure everyone's had a mop stab
    their ass without knowing it, once or twice.
[08:28] Gin
    It couldn't have been them!
[08:30] Gin
    Sure, their chins seemed familiar,
[08:32] Gin
    but save for Inoki, all of
    mankind has similar chins.
[08:36] Gin
    It's all good!
[08:37] Gin
    I'm sure my Ketsuno Ana's fine,
[08:38] Gin
    and that my ketsunoana's fine, too!
[08:40] Gin
    I'm overthinking this!
[08:43] T
    Anybody else?
[08:47] Gin
    There's a chin more
    recognizable than Inoki's!
[08:50] T
    They wish to remain anonymous, apparently.
[08:53] Gin
    There's basically no point to anonymity here!
[08:57] T
    Allow me to translate.
[09:01] T
    "I'm a certain someone's pet,
[09:04] T
    but my owner's an unbelievable
    piece of diarrhetic shit."
[09:07] Gin
    Why is his stomach getting worse and worse?
[09:09] T
    "He doesn't feed me properly
    or take me on walks,
[09:13] T
    and he has stinky feet.
    Also, he has stinky feet.
[09:15] T
    And to top it all off, he has stinky feet."
[09:17] Gin
    The stinkiness of his feet
    is all that's left now!
[09:19] T
    "So the other day, I got kinda mad
[09:22] T
    and went to take a dump on
    his face while he was asleep,
[09:25] T
    but it was runnier than expected and
[09:27] T
    sprayed all the way to my
    friend mopping up the room."
[09:29] Gin
    What the hell were you guys doing
    to that piece of diarrhetic shit?
[09:32] T
    "That made my friend slip and throw the mop,
[09:36] T
    which another friend broke in half.
[09:38] T
    One half lodged in the piece
    of diarrhetic shit's ass."
[09:40] Gin
    It was all connected?
[09:42] Gin
    Your diarrhea was the cause of everything?!
[09:44] T
    "That made him get up via spinal reflex
[09:47] T
    and hit my crotch.
[09:49] T
    The blow sent me flying,
[09:51] T
    and when I came to, I found an
    unfamiliar person crushed beneath me.
[09:55] T
    There was blood everywhere,
[09:57] T
    and he wouldn't move no matter
    how much I tried to wake him up.
[10:00] T
    I was really, really scared,
[10:03] T
    so I hid the body in the piece
    of diarrhetic shit's closet."
[10:05] Gin
    You're the scariest of them all!
[10:08] T
    "Lady Robokko, will my sin be forgiven?"
[10:13] Gin
    Oh my God!
[10:14] Gin
    It was them!
[10:17] Gin
    Not only did they mess up my
    Ketsuno Ana and
my ketsunoana,
[10:21] Gin
    they topped it off by confessing
    to an unbelievable sin!
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[10:26] T
    Um, Gintoki-sama?
[10:28] T
    How should he repent for his sin?
[10:32] T
    Um, Gintoki-sama?
[10:36] Gin
    Get rid of it.
[10:38] Gin
    I said, go dump whatever's
    in that closet into the river
[10:41] Gin
    before divine judgment rains down
    upon you, you damn meatball!
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[10:47] T
    Um...
[10:49] T
    Rather than repenting for his sin,
    he'll be committing another—
[10:51] Gin
    When the two sins collide,
    they'll cancel each other out.
[10:55] T
    Is that how it works?
[10:56] T
    I'll add that to my database.
[10:59] C
    Hey.
[11:00] C
    Mind listening to this old man's confession?
[11:03] Gin
    Sorry, but we're busy right now,
[11:05] Gin
    so could you come back—
[11:09] C
    I've committed a horrible sin.
[11:13] C
    The thing is,
[11:14] C
    I was walking the streets with my friend
    when a massive furball fell from the sky.
[11:20] C
    We got hit head-on by
    the thing and passed out.
[11:24] C
    When I came to, my friend
    was nowhere to be found.
[11:29] C
    If I knew things would end up this way,
[11:31] C
    I would never have taken
    him out of the castle!
[11:34] C
    How am I supposed to apologize to you—
[11:36] C
    no, to the nation?!
[11:39] C
    Sho-chan!
[11:45] Gin
    Don't tell me.
[11:47] Gin
    Don't tell me!
[11:49] Gin
    The body that furball hid in the closet...
[11:55] Gin
    It's the shogun?!
[12:00] Gin
    Jesus!
[12:02] Gin
    Th-Those guys assassinated the shogun
[12:06] Gin
    and then hid his corpse in
    my room behind my back?!
[12:09] Gin
    This is bad!
[12:10] Gin
    An "amen" won't be enough to write this off!
[12:11] Gin
    If anyone finds out, every last drop
    of my ***** fluids will be eradicated!
[12:15] Gin
    men!
[12:17] Gin**
    What am I to do?
[12:19] T
    Calm down.
[12:22] T
    This Sho-chan person has only gone missing.
[12:25] T
    We don't know for sure that he's dead, right?
[12:27] Gin
    Right!
[12:28] Gin
    For now, just make him leave
    before this comes back to bite us!
[12:32] C
    I've already looked everywhere I could.
[12:35] T
    But aren't there cases where,
    if you calm down and look,
[12:37] T
    you'll find whatever you were looking
    for unexpectedly close to you?
[12:41] T
    Like in a closet.
[12:42] Gin
    She's letting the shogun's crotch
    snake come out to bite us!
[12:45] C
    I see! A closet, huh?
[12:46] C
    All right. I'll try investigating
    all the closets in this area.
[12:51] C
    Thank you.
[12:52] C
    Amen!
[12:54] T
    Amen.
[12:55] Gin
    Don't amen me!
[12:56] Gin
    C-Calm down.
[12:59] Gin
    I ordered him to get rid of
    the shogun's corpse, remember?
[13:02] Gin
    He must've been washed
    way downstream by now.
[13:05] C
    Um, excuse me.
[13:08] C
    Can I go next?
[13:10] C
    You see, I've committed a horrible sin.
[13:14] Gin
    That beard looks familiar.
[13:15] C
    How should I say this? I betrayed
    my friend, or something like that.
[13:19] Gin
    Wait, why is he drenched?
    I don't remember it raining.
[13:22] C
    Actually, due to various circumstances,
[13:25] C
    I'm a vagabond who's lost
    his home and family.
[13:28] C
    Unable to bear the sight, my friend
    offered to let me freeload at his place.
[13:32] C
    Or, well, it felt to me like he offered.
[13:33] Gin
    Doesn't that mean you basically
    just intruded on him?
[13:36] Gin
    So I took Gin-san—
[13:38] Gin
    ...my friend up on his offer and
    started living at his place.
[13:41] Gin
    Wasn't he about to say "Gin-san" just now?
[13:43] C
    This place has no food or A/C, and is
    basically no different from living in the park,
[13:47] C
    so I had to make do with
    eating the dog food I stole,
[13:50] C
    but it seems like they found out,
[13:52] C
    because the sliding door to
    my room was suddenly opened
[13:55] C
    and I was dumped in the river
    before I could get a word in.
[13:58] C
    I barely made it out alive
    before running all the way here.
[14:01] Gin
    Huh?
[14:02] Gin
    Could it be that
[14:04] Gin
    completely unbeknownst to me,
[14:05] Gin
    aside from the shogun's corpse, a living
    corpse was also freeloading in my closet?!
[14:10] C
    Apart from dog food, I was also
    sneaking as many bites as I could
[14:14] C
    of pudding and the like from
    the fridge without being caught.
[14:16] C
    I wonder if that made him angry.
[14:18] Gin
    Wait a minute! What about the shogun, then?
[14:21] Gin
    Did the furball mistake him for the
    shogun and throw him in the river?
[14:25] Gin
    That'd mean the shogun's still in my closet!
[14:28] C
    Will the sin I committed be forgiven?
[14:31] Gin
    I fully understand your desire to repent.
[14:34] Gin
    Now prove that it is real with your actions
[14:38] Gin
    and throw yourself into
    the river one more time.
[14:40] C
    What?!
[14:41] C
    H-Hold on, Lady Robokko!
[14:44] Gin
    Was anybody else living
    in the closet with you?
[14:48] C
    Huh? Actually, I did sense a
    person in the upper level.
[14:51] Gin
    Take that person and throw yourself
    into the river one more time.
[14:55] Gin
    If you do, the heavens and your friend alike
[14:57] Gin
    will consider the pudding case
    water under the bridge.
[14:59] C
    No, everything but the pudding
    is getting swept under the bridge!
[15:02] Gin
    You mustn't come up until I say it's okay.
[15:06] Gin
    Amen.
[15:07] C
    Don't amen me!
[15:08] T
    Sorry, but when we say "amen,"
    your session is over, so please leave.
[15:13] C
    Hold it!
[15:14] C
    Seriously? Are you seriously
    going "amen" with that?!
[15:15] T
    Amen.
[15:18] Gin
    Th-That was close!
[15:20] Gin
    But now I've taken countermeasures.
[15:22] Gin
    The evidence should be
    destroyed this time for sure!
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[15:26] C
    Um, excuse me.
[15:28] C
    Could you listen to me?
[15:30] C
    I was living with my boyfriend,
[15:32] C
    but this filthy guy with a goatee suddenly
    showed up and threw me into the river.
[15:35] Gin
    It was you?!
[15:37] C
    He was clinging to me pretty persistently,
[15:39] C
    so I finished him off before
    running all the way here.
[15:41] C
    I wonder if Gin-sa—
[15:43] C
    ...my boyfriend was behind it.
[15:45] C
    True, I did eat his half-eaten puddings
    and say they were indirect kisses, but...
[15:50] Gin
    You were just kissing that
    filthy goatee indirectly!
[15:53] C
    I was wondering if that kind of
    thing might've pissed him off.
[15:56] Gin
    Shouldn't you guys be repenting
    for stuff other than the pudding?!
[15:59] Gin
    Wait a second.
[16:00] Gin
    Just where is the shogun, then?
[16:03] Gin
    Uh, was anybody else living in the
    closet with you and that filthy goatee?
[16:08] C
    I didn't see anyone else.
[16:11] C
    Why do you ask?
[16:12] Gin
    Could it be that the shogun was never
    in my closet in the first place?
[16:17] Gin
    Could it be that the furball
    hurt either her or the goatee,
[16:20] Gin
    and that while the shogun's case sounded
    similar, it was completely unrelated?
[16:25] Gin
    That's it! That's gotta be it!
[16:27] Gin
    The crime was occurring in the
    meeting room, not on the scene!
[16:30] C
    So, how do I get my boyfriend to forgive me?
[16:34] Gin
    You don't have to worry. I'm sure
    he's forgotten all about it already.
[16:38] C
    What, really?! Is it "amen"?!
[16:41] Gin
    It's totally "amen."
[16:42] Gin
    Even the heavens are saying they'll
    forgive you as a special service
[16:45] Gin
    if you buy some fresh pudding
    and put it in the fridge.
[16:48] C
    Ah, that's such a relief.
[16:50] C
    Actually, I had a feeling that was the case.
[16:52] C
    Otherwise, when he dumped me in the river,
[16:55] C
    he wouldn't have thrown me a life buoy.
[16:58] Gin
    Forget the meeting room, the crime was
    occurring in the confessional booth!
[17:02] C
    Well, I should return this life buoy
    to him along with the pudding.
[17:05] C
    Amen.
[17:06] Gin
    Wait!
[17:07] Gin
    I take back the amen!
[17:08] Gin
    Cancel the amen!
[17:10] T
    What's wrong, Gintoki-sama?
[17:12] Gin
    Tama, quickly confiscate what she's carrying
[17:14] Gin
    and leave it in front of the police station!
[17:16] T
    I'm not sure I follow, but very well.
[17:18] Gin
    Listen! Don't let anyone spot you in the act!
[17:22] Gin
    I should've done this all along.
[17:25] Gin
    The best way to deal with things like
    this is to dump it on the police.
[17:28] C
    Um, excuse me.
[17:30] C
    Could I have a moment?
[17:32] Gin
    Ack! That uniform!
[17:34] C
    Isn't Tama-san here?
[17:36] C
    Actually, I saw her doing something
    weird outside our station.
[17:41] Gin
    She messed up!
[17:42] Gin
    Someone saw her leaving
    the shogun's corpse there!
[17:45] C
    Um, the thing Tama-san left there...
[17:49] C
    This pudding. I ended up eating it.
[17:51] C
    Will I be forgiven?
[17:53] Gin
    What are you even talking about?!
[17:54] Gin
    Yes, I said to confiscate
    what she was carrying,
[17:58] Gin
    but learn to take a hint, damn it!
SIGN    Pudding
[18:01] C
    I knew it wasn't the right thing to do,
    but it was Tama-san's pudding...
[18:04] Gin
    What happened to the shogun, then?
[18:06] C
    I was wondering if she remembered
    the marriage meeting from before
[18:10] C
    and left the pudding for me, or something.
[18:11] Gin
    Shut it!
[18:12] Gin
    I don't have time to waste
    on you, pudding-for-brains!
[18:16] Gin
    Hang on.
[18:17] Gin
    I could use this guy!
[18:19] C
    What did you say?!
[18:21] C
    Tama-san found the shogun's corpse?!
[18:24] Gin
    But given the gravity of the situation,
[18:25] Gin
    she couldn't just report it to the cops.
[18:28] Gin
    The heavens are telling me that if you
    say you're the one who found the corpse
[18:33] Gin
    and report it as the Joi rebels' doing,
[18:37] Gin
    you'll get to taste Tama's pudding again.
[18:42] C
    Oh, hello? Hijikata-san?
[18:44] C
    I found the shogun's corpse.
[18:47] C
    There's a dying message that says "Zura."
[18:50] C
    Yes.
[18:51] C
    Please handle the emergency preparations.
[18:56] C
    Pudding.
[18:57] Gin
    Pudding.
[18:58] C
    I need to go forge the dying message.
[19:00] Gin
    All right! Everything's settled now!
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[19:04] Gin
    Wow, things are getting chaotic now.
[19:07] C
    Excuse me.
[19:08] C
    I need to talk to you.
[19:11] C
    Not for a confession, but to ask
    you to help with our investigation.
[19:14] Gin
    Huh? It sure is noisy outside.
    Did something happen?
[19:17] C
    The thing is, we got intel that
    the shogun was assassinated.
[19:21] C
    But when we got there,
[19:22] C
    instead of the shogun,
    we found one of our men instead.
SIGN    I'm not Zura, I'm Katsura!
    It looks like you're not home,
    so I'll come another time.
    P.S. Cancolle Kai's final boss
    is pretty hard.
    Did you kill him, Gintoki?
[19:26] C
    We found this dying message.
[19:28] Gin
    Zura came to hang out at
    the worst possible time!
[19:32] C
    He wrote a lot of drivel,
[19:33] C
    but most of it was to throw off the enemy.
[19:37] C
    What he wanted to tell us was the last line:
SIGN    P.S. Cancolle Kai's final boss is pretty hard. Did you kill him, Gintoki?
[19:40] C
    "Did you kill him, Gintoki?"
[19:42] Gin
    He even caused an
    extremely annoying miracle!
[19:45] C
    Do you know this Gintoki guy?
[19:47] Gin
    No, can't say I do.
[19:49] Gin
    Hold it right there! Gintoki didn't do it!
[19:51] Gin
    He didn't kill the shogun, pudding-for-
    brains, or Cancolle Kai's final boss!
[19:55] C
    I see.
[19:56] C
    Sorry for causing you trouble.
[19:58] C
    Amen.
[19:59] Gin
    A-Amen.
[20:01] Gin
    Crap!
[20:02] Gin
    The shogun was bad enough by himself,
    but now I've been accused of another crime!
[20:05] Gin
    And where the hell is the shogun?
[20:07] C
    Excuse me.
[20:08] C
    I'd appreciate it if you could hear me out.
[20:10] Gin
    I don't have time for that crap right now!
[20:13] Gin
    I'm the one who wants to confess—
[20:15] C
    Is that so? Forgive me.
[20:17] C
    I'll come again.
[20:19] Gin
    He was alive!
[20:20] Gin
    The shogun was alive!
[20:25] Gin
    I was wrong for trying to take advantage
    of people's desire to repent for their sins
[20:29] Gin
    and make money off of it!
[20:32] Gin
    I'll repent for my mistake!
[20:33] Gin
    I'll never do anything like this again!
[20:35] Gin
    So please, God, Buddha, Shogun!
[20:38] Gin
    Please forgive me!
[20:39] Gin
    I beg of you! I'll give you 300 yen!
[20:42] C
    Um, er...
[20:44] C
    I don't really understand,
[20:46] C
    but if you're regretting it that much,
[20:48] C
    I'm sure the heavens will forgive you.
[20:50] Gin
    Huh? Really?
[20:51] Gin
    Really, really?!
[20:54] Gin
    It's a miracle!
[20:55] Gin
    This is a confession!
[20:57] Gin
    Heaven won't abandon one who repents
    for his sins from the bottom of his heart!
[21:01] Gin
    I underestimated you, confession.
[21:02] Gin
    Forgive me, confession.
[21:04] Gin
    I'll turn over a new leaf and become
    an upstanding citizen, no matter what!
[21:08] C
    Is that so? What a coincidence.
[21:10] C
    You see, I came here looking to
    make up my mind to live a new life.
[21:14] Gin
    Huh?
[21:15] Gin
    The thing is, a certain someone saved
    me when I was lying hurt on the road,
[21:19] Gin
    but it seems I'd hit my head pretty hard.
[21:21] Gin
    I've lost my memories.
[21:24] Gin
    Huh?
[21:25] C
    But I've decided to cast my past
    away here, ask for forgiveness,
[21:28] C
    and live life with my eyes on the future.
[21:33] C
    Together with Katsura-san here.
[21:35] Kat
    Mark my words. You'll make a great Joi Rebel.
[21:38] Kat
    Together, let us bring down the rotten
    bakufu and with it, the shogun!
[21:43] C
    Sure, Katsura-san.
[21:51] P
    There he is!
[21:52] P
    Finally found you!
[21:54] P
    Hey, you got anything to say?
[21:57] P
    Aren't you going to confess
    and beg for forgiveness?
SIGN    Robokko's Confessional
[22:02] Gin
    Not really.
SIGN    Caution: Cameras flashing.
SIGN    Preview
SIGN    Breaking News:
SIGN    Unemployed man residing in the Kabuki District arrested for obstruction of justice.
[23:35] Rep
    Breaking news:
[23:36] Rep
    Sakata Gintoki was arrested on
    charges of obstruction of justice.
SIGN    Arrested on charges of Obstruction of Justice
     Unemployed Suspect Sakata Gintoki
[23:41] Rep
    In response to the questioning,
SIGN    Being a Leader Is Tough
[23:42] Gin
    "Being a Leader Is Tough,"
[23:44] Rep
    was the statement he gave.
[23:46] Rep
    We're waiting to see how
    the investigation unfolds.
SIGN    The protagonist has been arrested!!!
SIGN    Wait, this continues next week!!!
SIGN    Oh, well. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
SIGN    You may be a mere foot soldier there, Shogun, but I choose you!!