E53 - Long Time No See: Jiraiya Returns!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:06] ---
    Press down hard on the gas
[00:09] ---
    That’s right, there’s no compromise
[00:13] ---
    We'll slip through the night
[00:17] ---
    At the final moment push hard
[00:20] ---
    That's right, all the way to zero,
[00:24] ---
    Until we wipe away the days
[00:29] ---
    Gently open your heart
[00:35] ---
    If you pull it close to you
[00:40] ---
    It will reach you, without a doubt
[00:43] ---
    It will come, closer
[00:45] ---
    Now
[00:55] ---
    We’re speeding through life,
    squeezing it for all of its worth
[01:01] ---
    Our feet are tied
[01:02] ---
    But we still keep going farther
[01:06] ---
    Even if I take it back, and grasp it
[01:12] ---
    If you’re not the one
[01:13] ---
    There will be no meaning
[01:15] ---
    And so we’ll go far off into the distance.
[01:51] ---
    Hey… Closet pervert.
[01:54] ---
    Leaf Village Secret Finger Jutsu…
[01:59] ---
    One Thousand Years of Death!
[02:04] ---
    He’s totally knocked out…
    He’s weak, sure enough.
[02:09] ---
    What’s with that big frog?
    What the heck are you?
[02:18] ---
    Thank you for asking me!
[02:20] ---
    Know me as the Mountain Toad…
    spirit sage who acquires immortality,
[02:24] ---
    also commonly called the
    Toad Mountain Sage.
[02:28] ---
    Long Time No See:
    Jiraiya Returns!
[02:35] ---
    M-Mountain Sage?
[02:37] ---
    Exactly.
[02:43] ---
    Hey…Pervy Sage,
    what’re you going to do about this?
[02:48] ---
    Here, he was supposed to
    watch my training.
[02:50] ---
    You did that to him.
[02:53] ---
    He interfered with my research.
[02:56] ---
    Research?
[02:57] ---
    I’m a writer.
    I’m writing a novel.
[03:02] ---
    This is it.
[03:03] ---
    Make-Out Paradise
[03:11] ---
    Oh, that is…!
[03:14] ---
    You know this?
[03:18] ---
    I’ve gotten quite famous.
[03:20] ---
    That’s not much of a novel!
[03:23] ---
    In the first place,
    what research you are talking about?
[03:25] ---
    You’re just peeking at the girls’ bath!
[03:27] ---
    – Yikes! – No!
[03:31] ---
    Idiot, idiot…idiot!
    My peeking has been found out.
[03:34] ---
    You pervert.
[03:35] ---
    F-Fool! I’m not just a pervert.
[03:40] ---
    I get inspired by peeking
    and can write better pieces.
[03:44] ---
    Liar! No excuses.
[03:47] ---
    More importantly, what’re you
    going to do about my training?
[03:50] ---
    You mean the walking-on-water technique
    you were doing earlier?
[03:55] ---
    You know it?
[03:57] ---
    Then take responsibility
    and join my training.
[04:01] ---
    Humph. I don’t care about such things.
[04:05] ---
    Hey, hey wait, Pervy Sage!
[04:08] ---
    Join my training, hey!
[04:11] ---
    Shut up! I hate people who
    don’t know how to talk properly…
[04:18] ---
    And I don’t like men.
[04:21] ---
    Oh, umm, umm…
[04:23] ---
    That Make-Out Paradise was
    really exciting, cool and interesting.
[04:28] ---
    The purchase or viewing of that novel is
    prohibited for those 18 years or younger…
[04:32] ---
    You liar.
[04:34] ---
    The reviews that I‘ve heard are great.
[04:36] ---
    It’s useless to flatter me.
    I’m a sage!
[04:40] ---
    I’m not the type of fool who can
    be coaxed by a fledgling like you.
[04:45] ---
    Oh, hey…wait!
[04:53] ---
    Farewell, kid.
[04:56] ---
    Wow! He’s cool even
    though he’s a pervert.
[05:09] ---
    Heeey, Pervy Sage!
[05:14] ---
    Where’d he go?
[05:24] ---
    What’re you doing,
    you old pervert?
[05:28] ---
    No, no, I’m sorry, miss…
    but what lovely breasts…
[05:35] ---
    Pervert!
[05:41] ---
    This grown-up is disgraceful.
[05:44] ---
    Maybe there’s nothing special about him,
    after all.
[05:47] ---
    But there’s nobody else.
[05:51] ---
    Good grief…
[05:53] ---
    As usual, the women in
    this village are strong-minded.
[05:56] ---
    However, that’s makes them so good.
[05:58] ---
    “As usual”?
    Meaning you’ve come here before?
[06:02] ---
    You.
[06:03] ---
    And you did nothing but peeping, right…?
[06:06] ---
    You Pervy Sage!
[06:08] ---
    Don’t say pervert, pervert
    in such a loud voice.
[06:11] ---
    Shut up!
[06:12] ---
    So I bet that one shot on
    the closet pervert was a fluke…
[06:16] ---
    Anyway, I’ll have you take responsibility
    for ruining my training! Whoa…
[06:22] ---
    Jeez, you’re a noisy brat.
[06:25] ---
    Hey!
[06:27] ---
    Be quiet inside here for awhile.
[06:31] ---
    Hey! Let me out, you jerk!
[06:44] ---
    I want to have a romantic encounter
    with a stacked girl.
[07:16] ---
    How dare you do that to me earlier!
[07:21] ---
    Substitution Jutsu.
[07:22] ---
    Sure enough,
    he’s not an ordinary old man.
[07:33] ---
    Humph! That punk…
[07:36] ---
    It’s a million years too soon
    for that kid to take me on.
[07:41] ---
    Not really.
[07:46] ---
    It seems you have a bit of talent.
[07:49] ---
    Then you’ll watch my training?
[07:52] ---
    Give and take!
[07:53] ---
    I'm not averse to listening
    to your favor
[07:56] ---
    as long as you listen to mine.
[08:00] ---
    So which is it?
[08:03] ---
    Listen up…
[08:04] ---
    Nice ripe fruit that looks like this,
    like this and this.
[08:10] ---
    I’ll watch your training
    if you bring me that.
[08:14] ---
    You really will, right?
[08:15] ---
    This Toad Mountain Sage doesn’t lie.
[08:17] ---
    Okay, wait!
[08:30] ---
    Plans are plans.
    They don't necessarily have to happen…
[08:35] ---
    Hello there, you ladies!
[08:49] ---
    Oh my… You’re funny, old man.
[08:51] ---
    No-no, this is the solemn truth.
[08:57] ---
    Yeah, and then,
    what happened then?
[08:58] ---
    Hey, Pervy Sage!
[09:00] ---
    Oh no! Pervy Sage, he said.
[09:03] ---
    You fool! Who’s a Pervy Sage?
[09:07] ---
    I brought the promised item.
[09:09] ---
    Nice ripe fruit..
[09:15] ---
    Idiot, idiot, idiot, idiot!
    That’s not IT!
[09:24] ---
    Looks good!
[09:26] ---
    Don't hesitate. Help yourself.
[09:28] ---
    Thanks.
[09:31] ---
    No!
[09:32] ---
    Where’d the ladies go?!
[09:39] ---
    I got my fill…
[09:42] ---
    Ladies…
[09:47] ---
    No doubt about it. That person is…
[09:52] ---
    Good grief. I’ve wasted time…
[09:57] ---
    Hold it! Where are you going?!
    What about my training?!
[10:02] ---
    I don’t care! My precious research
    has been ruined thanks to you.
[10:07] ---
    Research, my butt!
    I can’t be standing around here, either!
[10:13] ---
    I’m going to train hard,
    become stronger than anybody,
[10:16] ---
    pass the Chunin exam,
[10:18] ---
    and then I’ll exceed the Hokage!
[10:23] ---
    Humph! I don’t care about such things.
[10:26] ---
    Here all you do is get in my way…
[10:28] ---
    Jeez, what a repugnant brat!
[10:30] ---
    Stacked girls like the ones
    from earlier
[10:32] ---
    are indispensable for
    my great writing enterprises!
[10:38] ---
    I see… So I should bring
    some stacked girls, right?
[10:42] ---
    Okay.
[11:15] ---
    W-Wow…!
[11:18] ---
    If you gaze at me like that…
    I feel embarrassed.
[11:21] ---
    Oh…!
[11:27] ---
    What a…
[11:28] ---
    What a cute girl.
[11:31] ---
    I like you!
[11:33] ---
    You pass!
[11:36] ---
    Idiot.
[11:38] ---
    You’re really my type of girl.
    What’s that technique called?
[11:45] ---
    It’s called Sexy Jutsu.
[11:48] ---
    Oooh, what an idea. You’re a genius.
[11:53] ---
    I get the feeling all adults are
    really affected by this technique.
[11:57] ---
    Then you’ll watch my training?
[12:00] ---
    Sure! However, I have a condition.
[12:04] ---
    A condition…? What is it?
[12:19] ---
    A-Always be…in that form
    when you’re in front of me!
[12:26] ---
    Hey! Sure enough,
    you’re just a pervert! You Pervy Sage!
[12:30] ---
    No! I’m not just a pervert!
[12:32] ---
    As if you didn’t know!
[12:38] ---
    I’m a super pervert!
[12:41] ---
    Darn it… He’s gone defiant…
[12:51] ---
    Well, brushing off the stuff until
    now as a joke,
[12:54] ---
    I’ll watch your training.
[12:56] ---
    You mean it, right?
[12:57] ---
    A sage doesn’t go back on his word.
[12:59] ---
    Okay, kid.
[13:00] ---
    Do that training that you were
    doing before one more time.
[13:05] ---
    Okay!
[13:11] ---
    Okay.
[13:44] ---
    Darn it.
[13:48] ---
    Totally worthless.
[13:51] ---
    Shut up!
[13:52] ---
    It’s pointless to wear clothes.
[13:55] ---
    Hey, build up your Chakra
    one more time.
[13:58] ---
    One more time?
[14:00] ---
    Just do it, quick.
[14:11] ---
    You!
[14:12] ---
    What?
[14:13] ---
    You’re pretty sexy when
    you’re naked.
[14:17] ---
    Jeez. I’m concentrating,
    so don’t interfere.
[14:21] ---
    Oh, sorry, sorry. Continue.
[14:24] ---
    You’re messing with my focus.
[14:48] ---
    I see…So this is The Seal Formula.
[14:53] ---
    Two Tetragram Seals
    making a Double Tetragram Seal…
[14:57] ---
    Is this an 8-Signed Seal Formula?
[14:59] ---
    Nine-Tailed Chakra is leaking
    from between the Tetragram Seals…
[15:03] ---
    and is fixed so that it
    can return to this kid’s Chakra.
[15:07] ---
    Fourth Hokage…
[15:10] ---
    It’s to protect this kid, huh?
[15:14] ---
    But after that, it’s stopped
    with a Five-Pronged Seal…
[15:19] ---
    Putting Odd-Numbered Seal
    over Even-Number Seals…
[15:22] ---
    This kid’s Chakra and that of
    the Nine-Tailed are discreetly intermingled
[15:26] ---
    and are not stable.
[15:29] ---
    No wonder he is not able to
    build up Chakra very well.
[15:36] ---
    That tickles…old man.
[15:39] ---
    Oh, sorry, sorry.
[15:42] ---
    Perhaps someone else…did it…
[15:45] ---
    The formula is rough.
[15:47] ---
    Well, it’s probably Orochimaru.
[15:57] ---
    Kid, give me a hurrah.
[16:00] ---
    What?
[16:01] ---
    Just hurrah. Come on, hurrah.
[16:07] ---
    Jeez, he’s demanding.
[16:14] ---
    Five-Pronged Seal…Release!
[16:36] ---
    What’re you doing?!
[16:38] ---
    Well, I just pushed
    the pressure points for relaxing.
[16:42] ---
    Just try walking on
    the water once more…
[16:46] ---
    Sheesh!
[16:55] ---
    What?
[17:03] ---
    I don’t know why, but it’s going well!
[17:08] ---
    Yahoo!
[17:14] ---
    I guess it’s about time to teach him
    how to control the Nine-Tailed Chakra.
[17:18] ---
    Okay, kid. Come on out.
[17:21] ---
    I’ll teach you an ace technique.
[17:24] ---
    What, what ace technique?
    A deadly technique?
[17:37] ---
    There’s something you need to
    understand well
[17:38] ---
    before I teach you techniques.
[17:42] ---
    You probably haven’t noticed,
    but you possess two types of Chakra.
[17:47] ---
    Huh? Two types?
[17:49] ---
    Until now, have you ever
    felt a special Chakra?
[17:53] ---
    Special? Hmm…
[17:58] ---
    Come to think of it…
[18:01] ---
    Come to think of it,
    I get the feeling there were times when…
[18:05] ---
    Chakra suddenly sprang up
    and an awesome power came out.
[18:10] ---
    But…I don’t really remember those moments.
[18:16] ---
    I see.
[18:17] ---
    But I do remember sensing that
    it was different
[18:19] ---
    from the Chakra I always build up.
[18:22] ---
    If I liken it to colors,
[18:25] ---
    while it’s always blue…
[18:27] ---
    it felt like it was red or something.
[18:31] ---
    I see.
[18:44] ---
    Okay. That’s it for today’s training.
[18:47] ---
    What?! Already?
[18:49] ---
    What happened to the ace technique?
[18:50] ---
    I can still train.
[18:53] ---
    With training, a watched pot never boils.
[18:55] ---
    As long as we’re here,
    let’s have a bath…
[18:58] ---
    Not just falling in…
[19:15] ---
    Warms me up.
[19:21] ---
    A drink after training’s the best.
[19:24] ---
    Say, say, Pervy Sage.
[19:26] ---
    What kind of technique is
    that ace technique?
[19:28] ---
    You’ll find out tomorrow.
[19:30] ---
    Miser!
[19:42] ---
    We’ll turn into boiled frogs if
    we stay in here too long.
[20:14] ---
    Ebisu, sorry for snatching
    your student.
[20:18] ---
    It’s okay. More importantly,
    I was surprised…
[20:22] ---
    The Hokage has had us searching
    all over for you
[20:25] ---
    and we could never determine
    your whereabouts.
[20:29] ---
    To think you were in this village…
[20:31] ---
    The Hokage will be pleased.
[20:35] ---
    Did you tell the Third Hokage about me?
[20:37] ---
    Not yet.
[20:40] ---
    I see. That’s for the best.
[20:43] ---
    Sure enough, something
    about Orochimaru?
[20:45] ---
    No, unfortunately not.
[20:48] ---
    What?
[20:49] ---
    I just stopped by looking
    for material for my novel…
[20:53] ---
    My nature is not to get myself
    involved in trouble.
[20:57] ---
    What are you saying?!
    You should know!
[21:01] ---
    What is necessary to stop Orochimaru,
    known as one of the Sannin,
[21:04] ---
    the legendary three Shinobi,
[21:06] ---
    is the power of another Sannin!
[21:10] ---
    Your power, Master Jiraiya!
[21:12] ---
    First, I need to sign this contract
[21:25] ---
    One! First, Tyson jumps and slamdunks
[21:28] ---
    Two! He kisses and hugs everyone
    randomly and says “I LOVE YOU”
[21:32] ---
    Three! Masala masters Yoga
    but hates curry
[21:35] ---
    Four! Sanchez is a lousy bullfighter. Ole!
[21:39] ---
    All over the world, the sky’s smiling,
    so look up and smile too
[21:45] ---
    Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
    Fight! Fight! Fight!
[22:03] ---
    One! Bodimahattaya-san devotes
    his time for digging black ships
[22:06] ---
    Two! Peking Duck, Action Scene,
    Chen Lee speeds around on his bike
[22:10] ---
    Three! Popo loves to polish his Coteka
[22:13] ---
    Four! Japanese people,
    now lend me you hand!
[22:16] ---
    All over the world, the sky’s smiling,
    so look up and smile too
[22:23] ---
    Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
    Fight! Fight! Fight!
[22:30] ---
    All over the world, the sky’s smiling,
    so look up and smile too
[22:36] ---
    Oh yeah! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!
    Fight! Fight! Fight!
[22:51] ---
    First, I need to sign this contract
    in blood
[22:54] ---
    and mark it with the fingerprints
    of one hand.
[22:57] ---
    Then I build up my Chakra.
[23:01] ---
    The Hand Signs are
    Dog-Boar-Bird-Monkey-Sheep.
[23:03] ---
    Then I must place my contract hand
    on the place where I want to summon it!
[23:09] ---
    How's that?!
[23:11] ---
    Next time, "The Summoning Jutsu:
    Wisdom of the Toad Sage!"
[23:16] ---
    What is this?!