E202 - The Top 5 Ninja Battles!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
    Rock away your existence,
[00:03] ---
    Shouting that you are here…
[00:06] ---
    A new journey begins now.
[00:23] ---
    As we survived through
    the changing seasons,
[00:29] ---
    we gained knowledge and strength,
    (just looks like a survival game)
[00:34] ---
    But the forgotten memories,
[00:37] ---
    of the feelings abandoned within
    the flows of time,
[00:40] ---
    have also been lost.
[00:46] ---
    When sinking down,
    we learned loneliness.
[00:52] ---
    But now we’ve met each other,
    we are no longer alone.
[00:56] ---
    Unveil your feelings,
    Those high emotions
[01:02] ---
    Those tears will change your fate.
[01:07] ---
    Pound your heartbeat
    against the darkness,
[01:10] ---
    We’re sure to meet,
    Under the same flag of pain
[01:46] ---
    All right, thanks for waiting!
[01:49] ---
    "The Special Presentation Today!"
[01:52] ---
    "The Top 5 Famous
    Sweat and Tears Ninja Battles!
[01:54] ---
    "There Are Also Fun Extras"
    has finally started!
[01:58] ---
    Isn't this exciting, Sakura?!
[02:00] ---
    Yes, from the next episode,
[02:02] ---
    “Naruto” which you’ve all
    been supporting
[02:06] ---
    for the past four years
    will enter its fifth year.
[02:08] ---
    And so today,
    we’re changing our plans
[02:11] ---
    to present you with
    famous battle scenes
[02:14] ---
    in the order determined by
    votes from the guys in the Leaf!
[02:18] ---
    Is that favorite battle you want
    to see again included?
[02:22] ---
    We’ve also invited
    some special guests,
[02:24] ---
    so don’t miss it!
[02:26] ---
    Then, we’ll be moving on ahead.
[02:28] ---
    First, check out fifth and
    fourth place back to back!
[02:38] ---
    FIFTH PLACE
    NARUTO VS. SASUKE
     LEAF HOSPITAL ROOF
[02:40] ---
    All right, here we go,
    here we go, here we go!
[02:42] ---
    Just what you’d expect of me,
    the hero!
[02:44] ---
    To think I’d appear right at the start.
[02:46] ---
    I’ve shrewdly got everyone’s hearts!
[02:49] ---
    You’re right!
[02:51] ---
    To be honest,
[02:52] ---
    the coolness of Sasuke in motion
    is unfathomable.
[02:56] ---
    Outstanding destructive power.
    Cha!
[02:58] ---
    Umm, Sakura?
[03:01] ---
    Our comments aren’t meshing
    right off the bat.
[03:03] ---
    Just keep quiet!
[03:05] ---
    Right.
[03:08] ---
    Multi Shadow Clone Jutsu!
[03:20] ---
    Attack and defense with
    no time to breathe.
[03:22] ---
    This is gripping.
[03:26] ---
    Throw in a kick there!
[03:30] ---
    Give him a beat down and thrash up!
[03:32] ---
    Umm, Sakura. How about
    a little support for the hero there…?
[03:38] ---
    Shut up, Naruto!
[03:46] ---
    Naruto Barrage!
[03:50] ---
    Fire Style: Fireball Jutsu!
[04:00] ---
    Wh-What’s that Jutsu?!
[04:08] ---
    You jerk!
[04:10] ---
    Chidori!
[04:12] ---
    Stop it…you two…
[04:18] ---
    Stop it!
[04:28] ---
    That’s mean to punch me all
    of a sudden, Sakura!
[04:31] ---
    I couldn’t help it.
    I got excited.
[04:34] ---
    FOURTH PLACE
    CHOJI VS. JIROBO
     FATSO VS. FATSO
     Now, let’s collect ourselves
     and check out fourth place next!
[04:39] ---
    It’s too late whatever you do now!
[04:41] ---
    Crushing Palm!
[04:47] ---
    Man, this battle moves me to tears,
    no matter how often I watch it.
[04:51] ---
    That’s right! As it happens,
[04:53] ---
    I sat down on my knees in front of
    the TV while blowing my nose.
[04:56] ---
    It invoked tears in the living rooms
    in the Land of Fire for sure.
[04:59] ---
    Yeah, yeah… I really thought
    Choji had died in this episode.
[05:04] ---
    That’s for sure.
[05:05] ---
    I was also totally fooled
    by the producers.
[05:09] ---
    Wh-What’s that…?
[05:13] ---
    But…
[05:15] ---
    Boulder Blow!
[05:19] ---
    It’s futile!
[05:22] ---
    I’m a hundred times stronger
    than before!
[05:32] ---
    They say a grudge over food
    is ferocious, right?
[05:36] ---
    That one punch just now
[05:38] ---
    was the grudge for you eating
    the last bite of the snack.
[05:42] ---
    No way! He’s got so much Chakra
    his build has changed!
[05:48] ---
    And this is…
[05:52] ---
    This is for insulting me by calling me
    a sacrificial piece and fat!
[05:57] ---
    But what’s most unforgivable is
    you insulting my best friend!
[06:04] ---
    That’s more unforgivable than
    swiping the last bite of gourmet food
[06:11] ---
    or insulting me by calling me fat!
[06:19] ---
    All my Chakra…
    to my left hand!
[06:23] ---
    O-Oh, no…!
[06:24] ---
    This one punch is heavier than life!
[06:29] ---
    W-Wait…! Don’t be hasty…!
[06:41] ---
    But seeing it again,
    visually it’s just fatso versus fatso.
[06:46] ---
    No appealing parts at all
    and the screen is stifling.
[06:50] ---
    I mean, no way would I want
    to see this during the summer
[06:53] ---
    Excuse me for being stifling.
[06:56] ---
    Yikes! Choji.
[06:57] ---
    How long were you there…?
[06:58] ---
    I heard my famous battle made it
    into the top five, you see…
[07:02] ---
    Oh wait, Choji.
[07:03] ---
    – You’ll understand once I tell you!
    – Calm down!
[07:05] ---
    Human Boulder!
    97.01 01:57:15:03 01:57:16:07 I won!
[07:17] ---
    I actually…won!
[07:26] ---
    We had a bit of an incident here,
[07:27] ---
    but let’s not worry about that
    and move on.
[07:30] ---
    Now before we present
    third to first place,
[07:33] ---
    we’ll show the famous battles
    left out of the top five.
[07:37] ---
    Is the famous battle
    you chose included?
[07:40] ---
    Now then, here we go!
[07:41] ---
    EXTRA SEGMENT
    UNRANKED FAMOUS BATTLES
[07:43] ---
    KAKASHI VS. ZABUSA
    THE LAND OF WAVES ARC
[07:47] ---
    – Rooster! – Rooster!
[07:49] ---
    – Water Style: Water Dragon Jutsu!
    – Water Style: Water Dragon Jutsu!
[07:52] ---
    Sure enough, Kakashi Sensei’s
    Sharingan is super unfair!
[07:56] ---
    Just what you’d expect from a Jonin.
[08:10] ---
    KAKASHI VS. GAI
    ROCK-PAPER-SCISSORS
[08:13] ---
    – What?! – You’re late!
[08:14] ---
    – This is a famous battle?!
    – You’re seventeen minutes
[08:16] ---
    – Well, it’s cool to have stuff like this
    – and thirty two seconds late!
[08:17] ---
    – included once in a while, right?
    – Let’s forget about today…
[08:19] ---
    We both have forty eight wins!
[08:22] ---
    One of us will move ahead
    with this battle!
[08:27] ---
    It seems it won’t work
    even if I say no…
[08:31] ---
    This time it’s my turn to determine
    the battle category…
[08:35] ---
    What will it be?
    A Taijutsu fight?
[08:38] ---
    A 100-meter dash?
[08:39] ---
    Skin diving? I wouldn’t mind
    an eating contest…
[08:43] ---
    Listen, you…
[08:45] ---
    Well then…
[08:46] ---
    Wh-What?!
[08:49] ---
    Rock-paper-scissors!
[08:50] ---
    I accept the challenge.
    No way will I lose!
[08:53] ---
    If I lose, I’ll do five hundred laps
[08:56] ---
    around the Leaf Village
    standing on my head!
[08:58] ---
    Absurdity again…
[09:00] ---
    It’s a promise!
[09:02] ---
    Here we go again…
    His favorite own rules.
[09:10] ---
    Okay, everyone together now.
[09:12] ---
    – Rock-paper… – Rock-paper…
[09:14] ---
    Scissors!
[09:16] ---
    After the commercial,
    we’ll present third to first place.
[09:19] ---
    Don’t miss it.
[09:24] ---
    Now at last for the presentation
    of third to first place.
[09:28] ---
    First up is third place!
[09:30] ---
    Now then, which battle has worked
    its way up to the higher ranks?
[09:36] ---
    Here we go! The appearance of
    the famous team of Kiba and Akamaru!
[09:39] ---
    – Heh! – Damn it…
[09:40] ---
    – It’s the appearance of
    – Is it all over…?
[09:42] ---
    a team that’s just loud.
[09:44] ---
    What?!
    You’re saying to do that?!
[09:49] ---
    No, Akamaru!
[09:50] ---
    It’s too dangerous to do that
    without any comrades around!
[09:54] ---
    You understand that, don’t you?!
[09:56] ---
    We’ll die like dogs here if we miss…
[10:00] ---
    Ow!
[10:04] ---
    Akamaru…
[10:13] ---
    To think I’d get bitten by you.
    I’m a pathetic owner…
[10:19] ---
    Okay, Akamaru…
    As you say, we just have to do that…
[10:26] ---
    Wolf Fang Over Fang!
[10:40] ---
    Now, Akamaru!
[10:42] ---
    What?!
[10:44] ---
    Show him the fruits of our training!
[10:46] ---
    Dynamic Marking!
[10:49] ---
    That’s a dirty trick!
[10:52] ---
    Now we’re ready!
[10:55] ---
    Inuzuka Style! Man-Beast
    Transformation Combo!
[11:09] ---
    Two-Headed Wolf!
[11:13] ---
    Eat this!
[11:20] ---
    Sakon, what’re you doing! To the right!
[11:22] ---
    Uh oh…!
[11:24] ---
    Wolf Fang Over Fang!
[11:27] ---
    Though he sometimes bites
    his owner’s hand,
[11:29] ---
    he presses for a decision.
[11:30] ---
    It seems Akamaru’s stock shot up
    in the Leaf after this.
[11:34] ---
    What a man!
[11:36] ---
    Man, my butt! Just a puppy
    whose evil eyes got worse!
[11:43] ---
    Who has evil eyes?!
[11:45] ---
    Yikes, Kiba!
[11:47] ---
    H-How long were you there…?
[11:51] ---
    Knock it off!
[11:52] ---
    Here I was invited as a guest
[11:54] ---
    with my battle
    having been ranked high.
[11:56] ---
    What’s the deal of
    finishing in third place
[11:57] ---
    on top of being told mean things?!
[12:02] ---
    It’s Kiba and Akamaru
    who finished in third.
[12:05] ---
    Please face the camera
[12:06] ---
    and say a few words to everyone
    in their living rooms.
[12:10] ---
    Oh, umm, thanks for your support.
[12:13] ---
    Well, we came in third this time.
[12:16] ---
    But we’ll kick the butts of some enemies,
[12:20] ---
    so please look forward
    to our success!
[12:24] ---
    Considering you’re talking
    all big or whatever,
[12:26] ---
    didn’t you have a rough time
    with it after this?
[12:29] ---
    The best is yet to come,
    I tell you!
[12:32] ---
    That’s the last straw.
    Get him, Akamaru!
[12:40] ---
    Now for the presentation
    of second place.
[12:51] ---
    He’s like a completely different person…
[12:54] ---
    His Chakra activity is overwhelming…
[12:58] ---
    And those markings…
[13:08] ---
    The movements earlier…
[13:10] ---
    He dodged the attack from behind
[13:12] ---
    and saw me hiding in the shadows…
[13:16] ---
    In other words, he’s combining
    wide vision and x-ray vision.
[13:22] ---
    And in addition, that Jutsu…
[13:25] ---
    Then…
[13:31] ---
    Summoning Jutsu!
[13:40] ---
    I’ll find a perfect…
    way to attack that power of yours.
[13:53] ---
    If he defends physical attacks
    with rotation
[13:56] ---
    and a large emission of Chakra…
[13:59] ---
    then I should stop that Chakra rotation!
[14:05] ---
    – This is the second place battle?
    – Scatter!
[14:06] ---
    That’s right! It’s a battle of brains while
    assessing the opponent’s weak point!
[14:10] ---
    Hmm. But as for me…
[14:12] ---
    I’m not a big fan of sluggish battles!
[14:14] ---
    – Oh, why? – Hmm.
[14:16] ---
    How can I put it?
    lf you’re talking about battle
[14:19] ---
    I want to see a collision of fist
    on fist, and body on body.
[14:23] ---
    Oh, but a Ninja isn’t just
    about Taijutsu.
[14:26] ---
    Oh. That’s being rude to Bushy Brow.
[14:29] ---
    Oh, sorry.
[14:30] ---
    I mean, yeah, I want to see
[14:31] ---
    something fiery, like Bushy Brow!
[14:34] ---
    There just isn’t anything fiery
    in Neji’s battles.
[14:38] ---
    Here!
[14:39] ---
    He’s argumentative or something.
[14:41] ---
    Unexciting or something.
[14:43] ---
    I’d like him to just take on the enemy
    without regard to appearances!
[14:47] ---
    Heh! Missions with you are
    a chore because you think like that.
[14:51] ---
    Yikes, Neji!
[14:53] ---
    Now then, a few words from
    the second place Neji.
[14:59] ---
    Humph! How silly.
[15:01] ---
    You’re free to evaluate my battles,
    but it’s unthinkable
[15:04] ---
    for me to be forced to appear
    in a place like this.
[15:08] ---
    Heh! You’re sure making
    an exhibition of yourself, considering!
[15:12] ---
    Oh! Could it be you’re after
    an appearance fee?!
[15:16] ---
    Too bad.
[15:18] ---
    This is a program for everyone
    in their living rooms,
[15:21] ---
    so we asked you to do this for free!
[15:24] ---
    No problem.
    I asked the Fifth Hokage
[15:28] ---
    and she’s treating this appearance
    as a mission.
[15:30] ---
    Since it’s a mission,
    I have no choice but to appear.
[15:32] ---
    And of course, a mission fee
    will be incurred.
[15:35] ---
    Whoa, always the realist.
[15:39] ---
    Neji, it’s not fair that
    you get paid for this!
[15:43] ---
    My brain is built differently than yours!
[15:49] ---
    Gentle Fist!
[15:54] ---
    It seems the ranking board is busted,
[15:57] ---
    so we’ll go right on ahead
    and present first place.
[15:59] ---
    Which battle has finished in first?
[16:07] ---
    Chidori!
[16:09] ---
    Oh ho! Sure enough, it’s pointless
[16:11] ---
    if the number one battle
    isn’t one of my battles!
[16:15] ---
    That’s right!
    This is the battle that
[16:17] ---
    anyone would
    acknowledge as number one.
[16:20] ---
    Rasengan!
[16:50] ---
    – Rasengan! – Chidori!
[17:33] ---
    And so, did you all guess right?
[17:36] ---
    The glorious best battle has been
    determined to be “Sasuke’s Battle!”
[17:40] ---
    Hey, hey, Sakura.
    lt’s the “Battle in the Final Valley”!
[17:45] ---
    FIRST PLACE
    NARUTO VS. SASUKE
     FINAL VALLEY
     What? Was it?
[17:48] ---
    Forget it.
[17:50] ---
    Well, let’s collect ourselves
    and check out
[17:53] ---
    some special footage of myself,
    who came in a glorious first place!
[17:58] ---
    Y-You…idiot!
[18:02] ---
    Hold it!
    What’s up with this recording?!
[18:05] ---
    – This is different from what I prepared!
    – What’re you doing?!
[18:08] ---
    – No, no, don’t watch!
    – Don’t be peeping!
[18:10] ---
    I demand a do-over as the hero!
[18:13] ---
    Someone not involved is
    making a ruckus.
[18:17] ---
    And now, thanks for waiting!
[18:19] ---
    Now for the appearance of
    a special guest.
[18:21] ---
    Let’s go live to the site.
    Master Jiraiya!
[18:25] ---
    What? What?
[18:26] ---
    Master Jiraiya, can you hear me?
[18:28] ---
    Yes… Loud and clear.
[18:31] ---
    What?
[18:32] ---
    Master Jiraiya,
    where are you right now?
[18:35] ---
    Mm, I’m in kind of a dubious place.
[18:38] ---
    I hope you’ll excuse me from
    divulging my location.
[18:42] ---
    Well, if I have to say something,
[18:43] ---
    I’d say I’m in a certain person’s
    hideout, I guess.
[18:46] ---
    Hey! Pervy Sage!
    What’re you doing there?!
[18:50] ---
    What happened to you
    watching my training?!
[18:53] ---
    Now, now.
    Today’s a special program,
[18:56] ---
    so don’t be such a stick-in-the-mud.
[18:58] ---
    More importantly,
    I’ve met up with someone special…
[19:02] ---
    None other than Orochimaru.
[19:05] ---
    What?!
[19:06] ---
    Sakura…
    What the hell is this…?!
[19:10] ---
    It sure has been a long time,
    Orochimaru!
[19:13] ---
    Oh, same here…
[19:15] ---
    Here you could have invited me
    to the studio.
[19:19] ---
    Who would invite the likes of you?!
[19:22] ---
    Well, I have been busy collecting Jutsu
    and conducting experiments.
[19:28] ---
    And more importantly,
    I need him to get stronger quickly, so.
[19:35] ---
    – If he’s there, bring him out!
    – What…?!
[19:38] ---
    Actually, I tried talking him into it
    many times saying today’s special…
[19:45] ---
    But in the end,
    he didn’t give me a good answer.
[19:49] ---
    – I see… – Hey.
[19:51] ---
    What?!
[19:52] ---
    Are you going to go
    on and on forever?
[19:54] ---
    If you’ve got that kind of time,
    then continue the training, Orochimaru.
[19:59] ---
    S-Sasuke…
[20:01] ---
    Sasuke…
    ls that you, Sasuke?!
[20:04] ---
    I’ll be going on ahead to the dojo.
    Get a move on.
[20:09] ---
    Oh, wait…!
[20:10] ---
    Oh, it seems I’ve angered Sasuke.
[20:14] ---
    I shall also be leaving now.
[20:17] ---
    Wait! Orochimaru!
    Put Sasuke on one more time…
[20:20] ---
    Sakura…
    He can’t hear you anymore.
[20:24] ---
    I know…
[20:27] ---
    – Sakura… – Yeah. Right!
[20:30] ---
    That’s right!
[20:31] ---
    Now then,
    it’s about time to say goodbye.
[20:34] ---
    Did you all enjoy our special:
[20:36] ---
    “The Special Presentation Today!"
[20:39] ---
    The Top 5 Famous
    Sweat and Tears Ninja Battles!
[20:42] ---
    There Are Also Fun Extras”?
[20:45] ---
    Hey, what’re you wrapping things
    up on your own for?
[20:48] ---
    What about my do-over
    special footage?
[20:51] ---
    You’re annoying.
[20:52] ---
    We don’t have any time left,
    so wrap things up now!
[20:55] ---
    What?! Fine!
[20:58] ---
    Unfortunately, my special footage will
    have to wait for the next time.
[21:02] ---
    But everyone in the village,
    including me,
[21:05] ---
    will keep showing
    awesome fights one after another!
[21:07] ---
    Everyone, please continue to support us…
[21:10] ---
    – and keep watching “Naruto”!
    – and keep watching “Naruto”!
[21:12] ---
    SEE YOU LATER
     – See you later!
     – See you later!
[21:40] ---
    On a checkerboard night
[21:43] ---
    when the stardust’s are rapidly dancing
[21:45] ---
    I just can’t come out and say,
    “Ah, I don’t want to go home yet.”
[21:51] ---
    Suggestively
[21:53] ---
    Spat at that beloved face!!
    Mister Cricket
[21:59] ---
    The Trombone gradually going off-key
[22:04] ---
    While on the sweaty center stage
    does bug me.
[22:11] ---
    But more importantly, the fuzziness I feel
    in my undeveloped chest,
[22:16] ---
    I wonder if it’s from
    that coke I just drank?
[22:50] ---
    I never thought that
    you were so stubborn!
[22:53] ---
    Even if you make a fuss,
    nothing's going to change.
[22:55] ---
    But, at this rate,
    she's going to abandon us.
[22:57] ---
    It's her choice.
    There's nothing we can do.
[22:59] ---
    Hey, Hinata!
    What do you think?
[23:01] ---
    We still don't know
    what her situation is…
[23:03] ---
    Does that mean that you're with Shino?!
[23:04] ---
    It's not like that!
[23:05] ---
    Hey, what are you fighting about?
[23:07] ---
    Naruto, Sensei is…
[23:09] ---
    Kurenai Sensei is going to quit!
[23:11] ---
    Next time: "Kurenai's Decision:
    Squad 8 Left Behind”