8 - Shiranui Is Here

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:38] hina
    Okay, but you've got to take care of him, you hear?
[01:41] haya
    Don't look so gloomy. Your mother's allergic to cats, so it can't be helped.
[01:47] hina
    I'm sorry. I'll definitely find good parents for you.
[01:53] haya
    I'm going to ask Ojou-sama if we can keep him.
[01:57] hina
    Okay.
[01:59] haya
    That reminds me. How can I repay you for putting up with me for the last two days?
[02:04] ---
    Is there anything I can do?
[02:06] hina
    Forget about it.
[02:09] mom
    Her birthday's March 3rd!
[02:13] hina
    Whoa! Wh-Where did you spring from?
[02:16] hina
    You're a total mess because of your cat allergies.
[02:19] haya
    So your birthday's March 3rd.
[02:23] mom
    Yep. So, if you want to express your gratitude, that's your chance!
[02:27] hina
    Wh-What do you mean by "chance"?
[02:30] haya
    Then, I'll try to think of a good present to give you.
[02:34] hina
    Geez, I just told you it didn't matter...
[02:38] haya
    But it matters to me.
[02:42] hina
    Well, I guess I should just look forward to it then.
[02:46] haya
    Please do! Anyway, thanks for everything!
[02:51] narr
    In short, this episode's story revolves around this little kitten and the big scene he causes.
SIGN    Shiranui is Here
[03:10] nagi
    Oh, has Hayate come home?
[03:16] nagi
    Welcome home, Hayate!
[03:18] nagi
    I'm sorry for making you leave on my account...
[03:23] haya
    Long time no see, Ojou-sama.
[03:39] nagi
    Whoa! Wh-What's that, Hayate?!
[03:46] nagi
    Hayate! Look! This is a kitten! It's a kitten! A kitten!
[03:51] nagi
    Did you pick up a kitten?!
[03:52] haya
    Ah, yes. I suppose I did...
[03:55] nagi
    I won't allow it, Hayate!
[03:57] nagi
    Kittens... Kittens are bad!
[04:00] haya
    Ah, I guess it was a bad idea after all.
[04:08] haya
    Um, Ojou-sama?
[04:10] nagi
    No, it's fine!
[04:11] nagi
    Of course I'll allow it, Hayate!
[04:14] haya
    Um, so will you or won't you?
[04:21] nagi
    Anyway, it's pretty unexpected to bring home a kitten, Hayate.
[04:25] haya
    Yes, I'm really sorry.
[04:27] nagi
    But, don't worry about it. I'll raise this kitten properly as a Sanzenin cat.
[04:33] haya
    Raise it? You mean you're going to keep it as a pet?
[04:36] nagi
    Yep. Leave it to me.
[04:38] nagi
    I'll take full responsibility for raising Shiranui!
SIGN    Name: Shiranui (Kanji: White Wild Dignity)
[04:45] haya
    Shiranui? You do realize it's a black cat, don't you?
[04:51] nagi
    Don't worry, it's a perfect name because there's a white spot right here.
[04:56] haya
    But, what will Maria-san say?
[05:00] nagi
    Don't worry about her either! Everyone knows that black cats and witches go hand-in-hand.
[05:04] mari
    Hold it right there.
[05:06] mari
    Who exactly are you calling a witch? Hm?
[05:10] mari
    Anyway, I won't object, but...
[05:13] mari
    I think you've forgotten something...
[05:15] nagi
    Forgotten what?
[05:17] mari
    We have another big cat in the mansion.
[05:24] narr
    Indeed, Tama is the Sanzenin's pet!
[05:29] tama
    Man, stop freaking out. It's not like I'm going to eat the little guy or anything.
[05:34] narr
    Tama can speak Japanese, but the story requires that only Hayate knows this.
[05:40] narr
    I'm just filling in some exposition for people who might have forgotten!
[05:43] haya
    Hm, you're pretty composed.
[05:46] tama
    It's because I'm an adult. That brat's got nothing on me. Besides, can you even fathom how much time...
[05:50] tama
    Besides, can you even fathom how much time Ojou-sama and I spend together?
[05:54] tama
    I used to sleep next to her when she couldn't sleep.
[05:57] tama
    And even now, I have to console her when she's sad or else she'll never be happy again.
[06:05] nagi
    Hey, Tama!
[06:07] tama
    See what I mean?
[06:10] tama
    It's a tough life being so popular.
[06:13] nagi
    Hey Tama, so this is where you've been hiding.
[06:19] nagi
    I've got something to tell you. Don't come up to my room for a while...
[06:25] nagi
    because you'll scare Shiranui.
[06:28] nagi
    So yeah, don't come to my bedroom under any circumstances.
[06:31] nagi
    Sleep by yourself for a while, you got that?
[06:35] nagi
    Okay, see ya.
[06:43] haya
    Um, Tama-san?
[06:47] tama
    Let's see... which of these will go best with kitten?
[06:51] haya
    Hey, I thought you said you were an adult!
[06:54] tama
    Shut up!
[06:55] tama
    No matter what anyone says, I'm Ojou-sama's number one!
[06:59] tama
    That's why I refuse to allow any man or any cat to come between us!
[07:11] haya
    Ojou-sama, you're pretty good at that.
[07:14] nagi
    Yeah, I used to spend a lot of time with Tama when he was young.
[07:18] haya
    I see...
[07:20] nagi
    It was a lot of work. I gave him milk, fed him, cleaned out his litter tray, played with him,
[07:27] nagi
    and slept with him...
SIGN    Mobile Suits
[07:29] nagi
    I showed him entire series full of: mobile suits; ultimate all-purpose humanoid weapons;
SIGN    Ultimate all-purpose humanoid weapons
SIGN    Mobile battleships
[07:32] nagi
    mobile battleships; revolutionary girls; cybernetic machines;
SIGN    Revolutionary girls
SIGN    Cybernetic machines
SIGN    Students raising children
[07:36] nagi
    students raising children; nine stone and seven stone combo droids...
SIGN    9st and 7st
SIGN    Combo droids
SIGN    To relive that touching time...
SIGN    He finished all those series
SIGN    Made him befriend monsters
[07:42] nagi
    I made him: befriend monsters;
SIGN    Job swap!
[07:43] nagi
    beat an entire game series where you can swap jobs;
SIGN    Beat
SIGN    Faced crazed zombies
[07:47] nagi
    fight zombie hordes with only a knife as a weapon;
SIGN    with only a knife
SIGN    in his hand
[07:49] nagi
    go to the arcade to play against game wizards;
SIGN    Fight to the death at the arcade with her rivals
SIGN    PC games
SIGN    Imaginary villages
[07:51] nagi
    fight battles to the death in imaginary villages on the PC;
SIGN    Repeating fights to the death
SIGN    Rowdy dancing
SIGN    Mushrooms and 037 texts
[07:54] nagi
    collect all the mushrooms and 037 texts;
SIGN    All collected
SIGN    Dawn
SIGN    Mitsumi's
SIGN    Doujinshi
[07:57] nagi
    buy Mitsumi doujinshi at dawn...
SIGN    Take the first train!
[08:00] haya
    I see...
[08:02] nagi
    It was pretty tough...
[08:04] haya
    So that's why he turned out the way he did...
[08:08] haya
    By the way, concerning Tama...
[08:11] haya
    I think he's feeling a little jealous at the moment.
[08:14] nagi
    Jealous?
[08:15] haya
    I suppose it's pretty much like how an older kid sulks...
[08:19] haya
    when they get a younger brother or sister.
[08:23] nagi
    Ah, that cat...
[08:25] nagi
    Well, I'll make up for it and play with Tama later.
[08:28] nagi
    Hayate, watch Shiranui for a while.
[08:31] haya
    Where are you going, Ojou-sama?
[08:33] nagi
    Oh, I'm just going to take a bath.
[08:36] haya
    Ah, a bath.
[08:38] nagi
    Yes, a ba-
[08:47] nagi
    You idiot!
[08:49] nagi
    Why did you remind me of that?!
[08:51] haya
    What?
[08:52] nagi
    Forget it! Just watch Shiranui for me!
[08:54] haya
    Yes!
[08:55] nagi
    Sheesh.
[09:02] haya
    But, what's Tama got up his sleeve?
[09:04] haya
    He should know that he'll be in danger of being kicked out if he does anything to Shiranui.
[09:10] tama
    That's why I thought up this gem.
[09:18] haya
    Tama, what the...
[09:21] tama
    I know very well that doing away with him won't do anything.
[09:26] tama
    That's why I have to execute my plan to get Ojou-sama to hate him so that she throws him out!
[09:31] haya
    A plan to get her to hate him?
[09:37] haya
    The only reason Ojou-sama would kick Shiranui out would be...
SIGN    Manga
SIGN    Title 6
SIGN    Magical Girl!
[09:42] haya
    I get it now!
[09:44] ---
    You're talking about the notebook that Ojou-sama draws her manga in...
[09:49] tama
    That's correct! I'm going to rip it to shreds...
[09:52] tama
    and use these "Footprint Stamps" to place the blame on him.
[09:57] haya
    You dirtbag!
[09:58] haya
    I'm not going to let you get away with this...
SIGN    Rip, rip, rip
[10:07] haya
    Shiranui!
[10:08] tama
    Why would you actually do that?!
[10:10] haya
    If Ojou-sama finds out...
[10:18] nagi
    What are you ripping up there, Tama?!
[10:26] nagi
    That's the manga I drew, isn't it?
[10:29] nagi
    And you dared to...
SIGN    You got it all wrong!
    It's a misunderstanding!
[10:39] nagi
    Stupid cats like you should roast in cages for a while!
[10:46] haya
    Give it up. It's karma.
[10:49] nagi
    Man, what a stupid cat. Honestly...
[10:59] narr
    Exactly as planned!
[11:07] nagi
    Shut it, Tama. Reflect on your actions.
[11:10] narr
    Ah, Tama's cruel fate! That's what we're pretending this episode is about...
[11:15] narr
    but actually, the second half is all about the moe factor!
[11:29] isu
    Oh, a kitten?
[11:31] nagi
    Yeah, Hayate found him yesterday. He's about a month old.
[11:37] isu
    I see.
[11:38] nagi
    It's a black male, and he's really tiny and cute.
[11:43] wata
    Well, Tama used to be cute too.
[11:47] nagi
    What are you talking about? He might be a little mischievous, but he's still cute!
[11:52] wata
    If you let this weirdo raise him, she's going to produce yet another messed-up cat.
[11:57] haya
    I'll watch out for that.
[11:59] nagi
    Oi! Tama's cute, and I am good at raising cats!
[12:03] haya
    Yes, got it.
[12:06] isu
    But... a kitten, you say...
[12:09] isu
    I bet it's cute.
[12:19] isu
    Who was that just now?
[12:21] nagi
    What's wrong, Isumi?
[12:24] isu
    Oh, I was just thinking that I should come over and see him.
[12:27] nagi
    Do you want to come over after school then?
[12:30] isu
    Yes, I'll come by after I've gone home and changed.
[12:33] nagi
    Changed?
[12:35] nagi
    You change even though you're blatantly ignoring school rules and wearing your own clothes?
[12:40] isu
    I'm not ignoring them, it's just...
[12:44] haya
    Now you mention it, you're not wearing your uniform, are you? How come?
[12:50] isu
    Well, that's because...
[12:53] isu
    Skirts are kinda floaty and embarrassing...
[13:00] nagi
    Basically, she doesn't like the uniform.
[13:03] haya
    I see!
[13:04] haya
    You're a freedom fighter who doesn't abide by rules!
[13:09] isu
    Anyway, I'll come over later.
[13:12] nagi
    Okay, I'll be expecting you.
[13:14] haya
    We'll be expecting you.
[13:22] mari
    Oh, Isumi-san, welcome.
[13:27] isu
    Good afternoon.
[13:30] mari
    Isumi-san, do you like cats as well?
[13:33] isu
    Yes, but Tama's the only kitten I've seen before, so I'm looking forward to meeting the new kitten.
[13:40] mari
    I see.
[13:44] isu
    Um...
[13:46] mari
    Yes?
[13:47] isu
    I feel a twisted aura emanating from this room.
[13:53] mari
    Oh, don't worry about that room.
[14:04] tama
    I'm innocent! Ojou, please believe me.
[14:16] mari
    Nagi, Isumi-san's here.
[14:20] nagi
    Oh, you made it.
[14:22] nagi
    Look! This is Shiranui!
[14:25] isu
    Oh, so this is Shiranui!
[14:31] narr
    And that's when it happened...
[14:40] nagi
    Hey, what's wrong, Shiranui?!
[14:44] nagi
    Shiranui!
[14:49] narr
    Isumi Saginomiya.
[14:51] narr
    The most powerful girl in the history of her clan...
[14:54] narr
    who has banished evil spirits for generations.
[14:59] narr
    But, at the same time, she's only thirteen.
[15:02] narr
    This was a heavy blow for her.
[15:04] isu
    I didn't think he'd hate me this much...
[15:09] bottle
    Ink
[15:16] calli+isu
    Sob, sob
[15:18] calli+isu
    Timidness
[15:25] guard
    What's going on?
[15:26] guard
    She's doing her relaxation techniques.
[15:33] isu
    This is no good.
[15:35] calli
    If you don't fight, you can't survive.
[15:37] isu
    I have to change.
[15:45] saku
    So, you came to my place because you want to become a girl that all the kittens adore.
[15:51] saku
    You did good by coming here.
[15:56] saku
    When it comes to being liked by cats, you'll find no one better.
[16:02] saku
    And that's because I used to catch rays by the bucketload, day in day out,
[16:05] saku
    when I was back in Kansai.
[16:09] narr
    She didn't really understand.
[16:12] saku
    So, relax! I'll teach you how to become a girl that all the cats adore!
[16:20] isu
    Please do!
[16:22] saku
    Well, seeing that you're wearing traditional clothes, the first thing you need is kelp!
[16:27] saku
    You wrap this around like so!
[16:30] saku
    And then, you add this!
[16:31] saku
    Cats love dried skipjack tuna!
[16:34] saku
    You hold it in your right hand,
[16:37] saku
    then you light it!
[16:39] saku
    And now you have... Final Secret Sword Kagu...
SIGN    This is dangerous. Please do not try this at home.
SIGN    *The staff enjoyed some delicious miso soup made from this kelp and skipjack tuna.
[16:46] isu
    I was stupid for asking Sakuya for help.
[16:48] saku
    W-Wait, I was only teasing.
[17:00] narr
    Isumi's taking a bath because she smells of kelp, so this scene isn't just...
[17:06] narr
    a gratuitous piece of fanservice.
[17:22] narr
    This isn't fanservice.
[17:39] izu
    The water feels great.
[17:41] risa
    This is heaven.
[17:43] miki
    I think that concludes our screen time for today though.
[17:49] narr
    Because this isn't fanservice!
[17:56] saku
    I'll give it to you straight.
[17:59] saku
    I think you might need to change your appearance.
[18:05] saku
    You wear those traditional clothes every day.
[18:08] saku
    Seeing how hard it is to change what's on the inside,
[18:11] saku
    it makes sense to work on your outward appearance first.
[18:15] isu
    But... normal clothes are so embarrassing...
[18:18] saku
    You're interested though, aren't you?
[18:22] saku
    Well, you are a girl, after all.
[18:26] saku
    I bet you sometimes want to wear frilly clothes like Nagi, don't you?
[18:30] isu
    Well, I suppose so...
[18:33] saku
    Right! That's all decided then!
[18:36] saku
    Aizawa maids! Please help our guest change!
[18:40] maids
    Yes!
SIGN    10 Minutes Later
[18:47] saku
    Nice. I guess there's a lot you can do if you're a natural beauty.
[18:51] isu
    Sakuya...
[18:54] isu
    This skirt is too...
[18:58] saku
    That's normal these days.
[19:00] saku
    Why don't we go over to Nagi's like that?
[19:12] saku
    Come on already!
[19:17] saku
    Are you stupid or something? You can't hide away now you're all dressed up like that.
[19:25] nagi
    I see. So, you dressed up so that you can be a girl that all the kittens adore.
[19:30] nagi
    You look pretty cute.
[19:33] nagi
    Doesn't she, Hayate?
[19:34] ---
    Sure does.
[19:37] haya
    Your usual traditional look is pretty cute too, but that skirt looks good on you as well, Isumi-san.
[19:45] isu
    Th-Thank you.
[19:49] nagi
    Well, but that's got nothing to do with kittens.
[19:51] haya
    Sure doesn't.
[19:59] narr
    Just then, she finally realized that she had been led astray.
[20:05] saku
    No, wait! Wait!
[20:07] haya
    But Isumi-san...
[20:10] haya
    If kittens really don't like you, I'll teach you a magic trick.
[20:15] isu
    A magic trick?
[20:28] isu
    Hayate-sama, what was that?
[20:31] haya
    It's diluted catnip extract.
[20:34] haya
    It's not a good idea to use too much though.
[20:36] isu
    Catnip?
[20:38] haya
    Yes. Plus, I think your traditional clothes might have smelled unpleasant to the kitten.
[20:44] isu
    They can like or dislike you over something as simple as that?
[20:48] haya
    Well, they are animals, after all.
[20:51] saku
    So, basically, she made a complete fool of herself by putting in too much effort!
[20:57] saku
    Sorry!
[21:01] haya
    They get along well, don't they?
[21:03] nagi
    You said it.
[21:08] isu
    Um, Nagi?
[21:12] nagi
    What is it?
[21:14] isu
    Can I...
[21:16] ---
    play with Shiranui a little more?
[21:24] nagi
    Shiranui, give Isumi a kiss.
[21:33] haya
    Ojou-sama, I brought him.
[21:36] nagi
    Oh, there you are!
[21:37] nagi
    Tama, come play with us!
[21:42] haya
    Ojou-sama said there was something missing without you there.
[21:59] narr
    And that's the story of how Shiranui became Nagi's pet and how Isumi wore a skirt.
[22:04] narr
    By the way...
[22:10] isu
    Up, up!
[22:20] saku
    What do you think? One print will cost you 10,000 yen. I've got lots more.
[22:27] narr
    In the end, someone also made a killing.
[24:05] haya
    Isumi-san looked cute in normal clothes.
[24:08] nagi
    If I wore something I don't usually wear, I'd be that cute too!
[24:13] haya
    Ojou-sama, you're cute enough as it is.
[24:16] nagi
    If I changed my style of clothing, even a German major would say I'm the cutest girl...
[24:20] nagi
    in the world.
[24:22] haya
    I know, Ojou-sama.
[24:24] nagi
    You don't believe me. I know you don't!
[24:27] haya
    The next episode of Hayate the Combat Butler is entitled What Girls Want...
[24:30] nagi
    Hayate, you idiot!