E40 - Otto Suwen / A Reason to Believe

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Garfiel
    "Instead"?!
[00:04] Otto
    Yes.
[00:05] Garfiel
    Where's the old hag?
[00:06] Otto
    I couldn't foresee what would happen,
[00:08] ---
    so I had her go elsewhere.
[00:10] Garfiel
    And what the hell are you still doin' here?
[00:13] Garfiel
    You wanna "talk things over," but the
    one you wanna talk to ain't even here!
[00:16] Otto
    That's true.
[00:17] Otto
    So I guess we'll just say I'm buying time so a
    certain boy and girl can be alone for a while.
[00:24] Garfiel
    Oh, really?!
[00:29] Garfiel
    You ain't got what it takes, small fry.
[00:37] Garfiel
    The stone—
[00:43] ---
    Damn it...
[00:46] Otto
    Is this what you're looking for?
[00:49] Otto
    A merchant always keeps one step ahead
    to ascertain his chances of success,
[00:54] Otto
    and that's what I am.
[00:56] Garfiel
    You piece of...
[00:59] Otto
    I've never had very many human friends,
[01:03] Otto
    but I made lots of non-human
    friends instead.
[01:07] Otto
    The entire forest is against you now.
[01:09] Otto
    Enjoy this welcome from
    the zodda bugs first!
[01:15] Garfiel
    Damn it... Damn it!
[01:17] Garfiel
    Damn it!
[01:31] Otto
    When I was a young boy,
[01:34] Otto
    the world was a hellish cradle.
[01:39] Otto
    No matter where I went,
    I heard endless voices,
[01:42] Otto
    but had no idea what any
    of them were saying.
[01:46] Otto
    At that age, I had no way to know that
    this was the blessing I was born with,
[01:51] Otto
    the "soul of language" divine protection.
[01:55] Bro
    Wait up!
[02:00] Mom
    Otto, what are you doing?
[02:04] Mom
    You're not going to play with them?
[02:08] Otto
    My parents tried their hardest
    to understand my abnormality,
[02:13] Otto
    but any who don't have a divine
    protection can never understand.
[02:35] Bro
    Otto, try writing it.
[02:43] Otto
    It was my brother, seven years my senior,
[02:46] Otto
    who realized that written words might
    bring about that understanding
[02:50] Otto
    when spoken words couldn't.
[03:16] Mom
    Otto...
[03:29] Otto
    That may have been the first time
    I'd cried out since I was born.
[03:38] Otto
    Then when I turned ten...
[03:54] Bug
    Big... light... went... that way...
[03:57] Otto
    Those meaningless voices started to
    transform into sounds with meaning.
[04:02] Bro
    You can understand what animals say?
[04:04] Otto
    Yeah.
[04:08] Bug
    Rain... fall soon. Rain soon.
[04:11] Otto
    They say it's going to rain soon.
[04:13] Bro
    Huh?
[04:22] Bro
    Otto, that's an amazing power.
[04:25] Bro
    And because it's so amazing,
[04:26] ---
    you shouldn't talk to zodda
    bugs when people are around.
[04:30] Otto
    Why not?
[04:31] Bro
    Divine protections are blessings
    granted by this world,
[04:34] Bro
    but there are people who would
    try to take advantage of it.
[04:36] Bro
    You have to keep your power hidden.
[04:40] Otto
    That's why I can't talk to you around
    other people anymore, Fulfew.
[04:45] Fulfew
    I understand, Young Master.
[04:47] Kid
    Liar!
[04:49] Kid
    Liar! Liar!
[04:50] Kid
    You're just a liar!
[04:51] Kid
    We know it's all lies!
[04:52] Kid
    You're so lying!
[04:53] Bro
    I'm not lying!
[04:55] Bro
    My big brother Otto can talk to animals!
[04:59] Bro
    Can't you, Otto?!
[05:20] Kid
    It's true!
[05:21] Kid
    Zodda bugs!
[05:26] Guy
    Oh, no! Zodda bugs!
[05:33] Kid
    You zodda bug freak!
[05:38] Otto
    After that, I sealed my divine protection
[05:41] Otto
    and swore never to use it again.
[05:46] Otto
    Then when I was fifteen...
[05:50] Guy
    You son of a bitch! I know
    you were with my girlfriend!
[05:54] Otto
    W-Wait a—
[05:55] Guy
    Shut the hell up, you zodda bug freak!
[05:58] Otto
    Zodda bug... freak?
[06:02] Otto
    I'm gonna find out the truth!
[06:06] Dog
    I saw.
[06:33] Otto
    I know the truth!
[06:34] Otto
    You're the eighth guy she's been with!
[06:38] Girl
    You jerk!
[06:41] Girl
    Someone kill him!
[06:47] Otto
    I made an enemy of the daughter of
    the most powerful person in town,
[06:50] Otto
    and they ran me out.
[06:58] Otto
    After that, I unexpectedly found
    my independence as a merchant,
[07:02] Otto
    and I busted my butt working.
[07:08] Otto
    I made up my mind that I'd
    run my own shop one day.
[07:18] Otto
    You can do it, Otto!
[07:20] Otto
    Go, go, Otto!
[07:29] Petel
    Well, well, well...
[07:31] Petel
    Where are you off to in such a...
[07:34] Petel
    hurry?!
SIGN    You're one lucky boy.
SIGN    You woulda been killed if I hadn't found ya.
SIGN    Better be grateful to the boss kid.
[08:20] Otto
    B-Boss... kid?
SIGN    Yeah, he's our boss.
SIGN    And he's the guy who saved your life.
[08:28] Otto
    I-I understand. Thank you very much.
[08:31] Otto
    And I should thank him, too.
SIGN    If yer gonna cry, go hide first.
SIGN    No man should start sobbin' in front of anyone.
[08:41] Otto
    Huh? C-Cry?
[08:49] Otto
    Darn it...
[08:51] Otto
    What is this?
[08:53] Otto
    This... Th-This...
[08:59] Otto
    I... I'm so glad I didn't die...
[09:05] Otto
    I realized that every time I cry,
    it marks a rebirth in my life.
[09:10] Otto
    My first cry as a baby
    after receiving life...
[09:14] Otto
    My second cry after learning
[09:16] Otto
    of my family's love and realizing
    where my heart lay...
[09:20] Otto
    And this day, the third,
    when I had a brush with death,
[09:23] Otto
    and gained an understanding of my
    purpose and reason for living.
[09:29] Otto
    I wasn't actually asked
    to buy time this way...
[09:33] Otto
    But it's all to help my friend!
[09:42] Bird
    ...coming! Coming!
[09:44] Bird
    Bad one coming!
[09:45] Otto
    I know that!
[09:47] Bug
    Right behind you. Already here.
[09:49] Otto
    I said I know that!
[09:51] Otto
    I planned for it! It's all
    part of the calculation!
[09:53] Hamster
    You're going to die. Poor thing.
[09:56] Otto
    Could you please stop being so pessimistic?!
[10:08] Otto
    Is this what happens when I keep using it?
[10:11] Otto
    My divine protection is such a hassle.
[10:15] Otto
    I wonder if Natsuki-san... is getting
    his chance to talk to Emilia-sama.
[10:44] Garfiel
    Found ya!
[10:57] Garfiel
    Damn you!
[10:59] Otto
    I was given a really exciting
    role to play for once!
[11:02] Otto
    I'm not letting you catch me that easily!
[11:33] Otto
    Come on, give me a break...
[11:35] Garfiel
    I don't think so!
[11:42] Garfiel
    I'm not lettin' you pull
    any of your shit again!
[11:45] Otto
    I... I wouldn't be so sure...
[11:48] Otto
    This fight isn't over ye—
[11:51] Garfiel
    I told you, I'm not lettin'
    you pull any shit!
[11:54] Garfiel
    Frankly, you surprised me.
[11:56] Garfiel
    I seriously never woulda
    thought you had it in ya.
[12:01] Garfiel
    You'll hafta forgive me for doin'
    somethin' so shitty to a man.
[12:08] Otto
    I think I've done all I could.
[12:11] Garfiel
    Gimme the stone back right now!
[12:13] Garfiel
    Enough already, damn it!
[12:19] Garfiel
    A'right, then. When you
    wake up, this'll all be—
[12:22] Otto
    Let's just say my personal battle ends here.
[12:28] Garfiel
    Ram!
[12:29] Ram
    El Fula!
[12:30] Garfiel
    Cocky bitch!
[12:36] Ram
    Not that I didn't know it, but you're
    so pathetic, I couldn't watch.
[12:40] Otto
    Isn't that a little harsh toward someone
    who just gave all he had fighting?
[12:44] Ram
    All you had? In the state you're in?
[12:47] Otto
    I've never seen a maid as well-described
    as the polar opposite of soothing!
[12:51] Garfiel
    Hey, Ram, doesn't joining their side mean
[12:53] Garfiel
    you're goin' against what
    that bastard Roswaal wants?
[12:57] Ram
    I would give my very soul to fulfill
    my master's fondest desire.
[13:00] Ram
    But...
[13:02] Ram
    in my own way.
[13:04] Garfiel
    Cut the shit!
[13:05] Garfiel
    What do you think is happenin'
    while you keep me here?!
[13:09] Garfiel
    You really think he's worth
    trustin' that much?!
[13:13] Otto
    Is Natsuki-san worth it?
[13:15] Otto
    Well, if we're talking about
    whether he's worth anything,
[13:18] Otto
    I suppose he's not.
[13:19] Garfiel
    Huh?!
[13:20] Otto
    But I look forward to seeing
    what flowers bloom from him,
[13:23] Otto
    so I keep pruning and
    brushing off the bugs...
[13:27] Otto
    I suppose that's the mood I'm in now.
[13:30] Ram
    Hmph. Frankly, I have no idea what
    gives you such high hopes for Barusu.
[13:36] Ram
    He's weak, useless, and so incompetent,
    he can't even make tea right.
[13:41] Otto
    That's going a bit too far...
    or maybe not, actually.
[13:45] Ram
    But... when it's do or die,
[13:48] Ram
    he has bizarrely good timing.
[13:52] Ram
    A man who only has good timing.
[13:54] ---
    That's what Barusu is.
[13:56] Ram
    If he believes he sees an
    opportunity and acts on it,
[14:00] Ram
    you know that's the only path to victory.
[14:03] Otto
    I guess when all's said and done,
    you trust Natsuki-san too, Ram-san.
[14:06] Ram
    That's "Ram-sama."
[14:07] Otto
    That's such a hostile way
    to hide your shyness!
[14:11] Garfiel
    Enough!
[14:25] Ram
    Stay back.
[14:26] Otto
    Wait... Ram-san!
[14:38] Ram
    Have you ever once beaten me in a punch-out?
[14:47] Otto
    No... way...
[15:01] Ram
    You've gotten stronger, Garf.
[15:24] Ram
    Al Fula!
[15:32] Subaru
    I'm counting on you, Otto.
    Please don't do anything crazy.
[15:37] Subaru
    Now...
[15:39] Subaru
    I'm going to do my part.
[15:46] Subaru
    Oh, good. I finally found you.
SIGN    Otto Suwen
[16:00] Subaru
    You really thought this through,
    didn't you, Emilia-tan?
[16:04] Subaru
    You knew no one would find
    you if you holed up in here.
[16:08] Emilia
    Why... are you here, Subaru? You don't...
[16:13] Subaru
    ...get forced back as hard as Roswaal?
[16:16] Subaru
    I mean, I'm here, but I'm
    fighting pretty hard to endure.
[16:21] Emilia
    I... see...
[16:23] Subaru
    Half of me believed you'd be here,
    and half of me just wished for it.
[16:29] Emilia
    Half... and half...
[16:31] Subaru
    I'm so relieved that I found you.
[16:34] Emilia
    Just... relieved?
[16:37] Emilia
    You're not angry?
[16:39] Subaru
    What's this about, Emilia-tan?
[16:41] Subaru
    Were you actually afraid I'd be mad at you?
[16:44] Subaru
    I'm not angry.
[16:46] Subaru
    Though I did panic, and frankly,
    I wasn't even sure I was alive.
[16:49] Emilia
    I see. You're not angry.
[16:52] Subaru
    Emilia?
[16:56] Emilia
    You're not angry at me, Subaru.
[17:01] Emilia
    You won't even get angry.
[17:04] Emilia
    Why won't you get angry?
[17:08] Emilia
    What I did was selfish, wasn't it?
[17:11] Emilia
    It caused trouble for you, didn't it?
[17:13] Emilia
    I worried you by leaving
    without saying anything.
[17:17] Emilia
    Are you not angry because you d-didn't
    expect anything in the first place?
[17:21] Emilia
    You're kind to me even when I mess up
[17:24] Emilia
    because you're not even
    disappointed in me, right?
[17:27] Emilia
    Because you know it's
    never going to go right?
[17:30] Subaru
    No, Emilia! That's not what I think!
[17:33] Emilia
    Then...
[17:35] Emilia
    Then why?
[17:38] Emilia
    Why didn't you keep your promise?!
[17:41] Emilia
    You and Puck both broke
    your word and went away.
[17:46] Emilia
    You went away and left me behind.
[17:50] Emilia
    You're a liar.
[17:52] ---
    Puck is a liar.
[17:55] Emilia
    Liar...
[17:57] ---
    You liar...
[17:59] Subaru
    Emilia...
[17:59] Emilia
    You shouldn't... break a promise...
[18:03] Emilia
    You shouldn't lie!
[18:05] Emilia
    It's wrong!
[18:20] Subaru
    Emilia...
[18:22] Subaru
    I love you.
[18:24] Emilia
    Huh?
[18:28] Subaru
    Night after night, you go rushing into
    the same damn trial over and over.
[18:32] Subaru
    What the hell is that trial, anyway?
     It's just the past!
[18:35] Subaru
    Don't keep moping over stuff
    that's over and done with!
[18:38] Emilia
    Uh, wha...
[18:39] Subaru
    When I tried to do it for you, you
    insisted that only you could do it.
[18:44] Subaru
    So when you blow it, that just
    means you were all talk!
[18:47] Emilia
    S-Subaru...
[18:48] Subaru
    And in the end, when your
    pet and guardian takes off,
[18:51] Subaru
    you abandon your duties and run off
    to sulk and cry your eyes out?
[18:54] Subaru
    I can't put up with it any longer!
[19:00] Emilia
    You're right.
[19:02] ---
    It only makes sense that
    you'd think of me that way.
[19:06] Subaru
    But still...
[19:08] Subaru
    I love you, Emilia.
[19:14] Subaru
    I love you.
[19:17] Subaru
    I love you so, so, so much, I don't
    know what to do with myself.
[19:21] Emilia
    Wh-Where did all this come from?
[19:24] Subaru
    I love that beautiful silver hair of yours,
[19:27] Subaru
    I love those damp purple
    jewels you have for eyes.
[19:31] Subaru
    I love your voice and how just
    hearing it puts me in a trance.
[19:34] Subaru
    Your long, slender arms
    and legs, your pale skin,
[19:38] Subaru
    and your height are all so perfect
    to me that I can't stand it.
[19:41] Subaru
    Just being with you makes my
    heart race out of control.
[19:44] Subaru
    It's scary, honestly.
[19:47] Subaru
    I love how you're a little
    absent-minded, too.
[19:49] Subaru
    The way you give everything
    your all is adorable,
[19:52] Subaru
    and I respect the way you do
    your best to help others.
[19:56] Subaru
    It's hard to leave you alone when I see
    you putting others before yourself.
[20:00] Subaru
    I want to see all the expressions you
    make from right here beside you.
[20:05] Emilia
    Th-This is no time for...
[20:08] Emilia
    Stop playing around!
[20:10] Emilia
    Why are you suddenly saying all this?!
[20:13] Emilia
    That's not what we were talking about!
[20:15] Emilia
    You were saying that I'm utterly useless,
[20:17] ---
    that you couldn't put up with me!
[20:19] Subaru
    Yeah, you're right.
[20:20] Emilia
    So why would you forgive
    me for being so useless?!
[20:23] Subaru
    If that answer is all you want,
    I've said it over and over!
[20:26] Subaru
    It's because I love you!
[20:31] Subaru
    I'm head-over-heels in love with you!
[20:33] Subaru
    Everything about you shines in my eyes!
[20:36] Subaru
    Yeah, of course, parts of you aren't perfect.
[20:39] Subaru
    You're not an angel or a goddess.
    You're an ordinary girl.
[20:42] Subaru
    You'll feel so bad that you
    want to cry sometimes,
[20:44] Subaru
    and you'll want to run away from
    things that hurt! I get that!
[20:48] Subaru
    But even including that weakness and
    the parts you might even call ugly...
[20:54] Subaru
    I love every part of your being, Emilia.
[20:58] Emilia
    That's just... t-too selfish!
[21:01] Emilia
    You just named all the things
    that make me useless,
[21:04] Emilia
    and you still say you love me?
[21:07] Emilia
    How can you expect me to believe you?!
[21:08] Subaru
    You're wrong! You've got
    it completely wrong!
[21:12] Subaru
    It's not because I believe
    in you that I love you!
[21:16] Subaru
    I believe in you because I love you!
[21:19] Emilia
    Just loving someone isn't a
    reason to believe in them!
[21:24] Subaru
    If just loving you isn't a
    reason to believe in you...
[21:27] Subaru
    Then who the hell would willingly
    go through all this suffering
[21:31] Subaru
    to come and help a pain
    in the ass like you?!
[21:34] Subaru
    I love you so much it makes me crazy!
[21:38] Subaru
    I love you so much I could die!
[21:40] Subaru
    That's why I put up with
    the pain and suffering!
[21:43] Subaru
    Even now, I feel like I might puke,
    but I'm still standing in front of you!
[21:47] Emilia
    I never asked you to do that!
[21:50] Emilia
    You're just being selfish!
[21:52] ---
    You're not thinking about my feelings at all!
[21:56] Emilia
    You have no idea how
    I feel every time I see you
[21:59] Emilia
    getting hurt because of me!
[22:02] Subaru
    How would I know?! I don't
    even think about it!
[22:05] Subaru
    All I think about is how to
    look good in front of you!
[22:09] Subaru
    I'm suffering for you here!
[22:11] ---
    At least try to look as
    cute as I hoped you would!
[22:14] Emilia
    Don't talk like I'm just some doll!
[22:16] Emilia
    Why did you break your promise?!
[22:18] Emilia
    If you'd just done what I asked you to,
     that would've been enough!
[22:21] Emilia
    Why wouldn't you even do that?!
[22:23] Emilia
    You actually hate me, don't you?!
[22:25] Subaru
    I love you!
[22:26] Emilia
    Liar!
[22:27] Subaru
    I'm not lying! I love you!
[22:28] Emilia
    Then...
[22:33] Emilia
    Why?
[22:35] ---
    Why did you break your promise?
[22:39] Subaru
    I can't tell you.
[22:40] Emilia
    If you'd stayed with me until
    morning like you promised,
[22:44] Emilia
    I think I could have believed you.
[22:47] Emilia
    I could have believed you and
    entrusted you with everything.
[22:52] Emilia
    But you...
[23:01] Emilia
    Since Puck left, my memories
    have been slowly coming back.
[23:07] Emilia
    Sights in my mind that I don't recognize...
[23:10] Emilia
    Conversations I don't remember...
[23:12] Emilia
    More and more of them keep coming back.
[23:15] Emilia
    I thought I remembered
    everything all this time,
[23:19] Emilia
    but I went and forgot them,
    as if they never existed.
[23:25] Emilia
    When all the memories come back,
[23:28] Emilia
    what's going to happen to me?
[23:31] Emilia
    Is this me... really me?
[23:34] Emilia
    I forgot so many important things.
[23:36] Emilia
    I even forgot about Mother.
[23:39] Emilia
    And yet... I'm not wrong?
[23:47] Nahoko
    What matters isn't how you start
    or what happens in the middle.
[23:51] Nahoko
    It's how it ends.
[23:55] Subaru
    Yeah... you're right, Mom.
[24:00] Subaru
    No matter what memories you get back,
[24:03] Subaru
    it won't change anything.
[24:06] Subaru
    I love you.
[24:08] ---
    I'm always going to love you.
[24:11] Emilia
    I can't believe that.
[24:14] Emilia
    If the me that you say you love...
    g-goes away, could you still...
[24:22] Subaru
    I could.
[24:23] Subaru
    No matter what happens,
    you're not going to go away.
[24:27] Subaru
    I love you.
[24:29] Emilia
    But you're a liar!
[24:31] Emilia
    You wouldn't make me believe you.
[24:35] Subaru
    Then I'll make you believe me now.
[24:40] Emilia
    Suba—
[24:41] Subaru
    If you don't want this, then dodge.
[25:14] Subaru
    I love you.
[25:16] Subaru
    No matter how many hopeless
    sides of you I see,
[25:18] Subaru
    and even if we argue like this...
[25:20] Subaru
    I'm never going to stop loving you.
[25:24] Subaru
    That won't change, no matter what happens.
[25:27] Subaru
    I'll just love you even more than before.
[25:29] Subaru
    That's why I'll always believe in you.
[25:33] Subaru
    And if you want to know why...
[25:36] Emilia
    Because... you love me?
[25:42] Subaru
    With all those unfamiliar
    memories flooding you,
[25:45] Subaru
    it's only natural that you'd
    feel anxious and scared.
[25:48] Subaru
    But the path you've walked
    until now won't go away.
[25:52] Subaru
    You're going to be fine.
[25:54] Emilia
    How can you say that for sure?
[25:58] Subaru
    What matters isn't how you start.
[26:00] ---
    It's how it ends.
[26:03] Subaru
    The woman I respect the most
    in the whole world said so.
[26:08] Subaru
    You'll be fine, Emilia.
[26:10] Subaru
    I'm on your side.
[26:12] ---
    It's okay if you remember everything.
[26:15] Subaru
    And if you're still scared, we'll find it.
[26:18] Emilia
    Find... what?
[26:22] Subaru
    Just like my feelings for you make
    me able to keep running forward,
[26:26] Subaru
    you'll find your most precious feeling,
    the one that makes you able to blow away
[26:30] Subaru
    all the anxieties and run forward.
[26:34] Subaru
    Of course, I'd like to hope that
    precious feeling will be for me.
[26:41] Emilia
    My most... precious feeling...
[26:46] Emilia
    I wonder if it's among all these
    memories I've been getting back.
[26:52] Emilia
    My most precious feeling...
[26:55] Subaru
    Yeah, I'm sure it is.
[26:57] Subaru
    Your reason to keep walking is there.
[27:08] Emilia
    Yeah.
SIGN    A Reason to Believe
[27:24] Subaru
    Hey. Sorry to keep you waiting.
[27:26] Garfiel
    Ain't like I was waitin' for you.
[27:29] ---