E7 - Summer's Staples! (The Fanservice Episode, Frankly)

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] T
    Oh, so this is the beach in this world!
[00:09] T
    With all these people here,
[00:10] T
    it's tempting to just mow them all down
     at once, isn't it, Miss Kobayashi?
[00:13] K
    Don't do it.
[00:14] Kanna
    The ocean here's salty?
[00:16] K
    It is.
[00:17] Kanna
    That's the same, then.
[00:18] Lucoa
    The best thing about swimsuits
    is that you can boldly show off more flesh.
[00:22] K
    No, that's out.
[00:24] L
    Really?
[00:26] L
    What do you think, Shouta?
[00:28] S
    I-I don't know where to look...
[00:32] S
    This is reassuring.
[00:33] K
    That doesn't make me happy to hear at all.
[00:36] Security
    Excuse me, ma'am.
[00:37] L
    Yes?
[00:38] Security
    Could you come with me?
    Your swimsuit is too skimpy.
[00:40] L
    Huh? Um, hey!
[00:42] K
    Well, that's to be expected.
[02:17] L
    I'm finally back.
[02:19] K
    You brought a spare swimsuit?
[02:21] Lucoa
    It's my scales.
[02:23] K
    Oh, that works for your swimsuits, too?
[02:26] T
    Yes, we looked them up on the internet!
[02:29] T
    Nice, aren't they?
[02:29] K
    I'm more envious of what's
    filling out that swimsuit though.
[02:32] Kanna
    I want to play now.
[02:34] T
    Right, let's go play!
[02:37] T
    Miss Kobayashi, what will you do?
[02:38] K
    Hmm, nothing much.
[02:41] T
    What's the matter, Miss Kobayashi?
[02:43] T
    You haven't been very excited all day.
[02:45] K
    To be honest, I'm not a big fan of the beach.
[02:48] Both
    Huh?!
[02:49] L
    That's too honest.
[02:51] K
    Well, it's hot, you get sunburned,
     and sand is annoying.
[02:54] Shouta
    Same for me.
[02:55] Shouta
    I prefer the indoors.
[02:57] T
    Then why did you come with us today?
[03:00] K
    Well...
[03:02] K
    Because I don't have much
    else to do this summer.
[03:04] K
    My manager asked me to look
    after Shouta-kun, too,
[03:08] K
    so I figured going with
    everyone would be better.
[03:11] T
    Oh, I know what's going on here!
[03:13] T
    That tsundere thing, right?!
[03:14] K
    Completely different.
[03:15] Kanna
    I want to play now.
[03:17] T
    Oh, right.
[03:19] T
    Then, uh...
[03:22] T
    First, let's put on sunscreen!
[03:24] T
    What an inferior species,
[03:25] T
    having skin that gets damaged if you
    don't coat yourselves in such a thing.
[03:29] T
    Now, here I go, Miss Kobayashi!
[03:31] K
    Do anything weird and you're fired.
[03:33] T
    Yes.
[03:34] L
    Well, Shouta, could you?
[03:37] L
    There. Go ahead.
[03:40] L
    Come on.
[03:45] S
    I-I can't!
[03:47] L
    I see.
[03:48] L
    Switch, then.
[03:58] L
    Well, Shouta?
[04:00] S
    W-Well what?
[04:02] L
    Am I coating you right?
[04:04] S
    You really are a demon, aren't you?
[04:06] L
    Huh?!
[04:08] S
    Why are you trying to seduce me?!
[04:12] T
    Miss Lucoa, why don't you
    just try being a demon?
[04:16] Kanna
    I want to play now.
[04:17] T
    Next is watermelon splitting.
[04:19] Kanna
    I'm in.
[04:20] T
    Further right!
[04:22] L
    Ah, you went too far. A little left!
[04:25] T
    Yes, yes, now just go straight.
[04:27] T
    Okay, stop.
[04:34] Kanna
    Yay.
[04:35] T
    Impressive, Kanna!
[04:37] T
    You obliterated every last trace of it.
[04:39] K
    Yeah, oh well.
[04:41] Kanna
    I want to swim!
[04:42] T
    Sure, let's go!
[04:44] K
    Don't go too far out.
[04:47] T
    Why not?
[04:48] K
    It's dangerous.
[04:50] T
    Oh, you're right.
    He is scary, that Leviathan.
[04:54] T
    That one time I was nearly
    killed really was a disaster.
[04:58] K
    What did you do?
[04:59] T
    I saw him from behind and mistook him
    for Rahab when calling out to him.
[05:02] (Flashback) Lev
    Why you! I'll kill you!
[05:04] K
    Well, no, it's because no one can
    help you if you start to drown.
[05:07] T
    Oh yeah, you humans can't
    breathe under water, can you?
[05:10] T
    What an inferior species.
[05:12] K
    You can, Tohru?
[05:14] T
    I can. Swimming to my heart's
    content feels really good.
[05:17] K
    Does she have gills or something?
[05:19] Kanna
    Lady Tohru, let's race to there.
[05:22] T
    You're on.
[05:24] T
    Miss Kobayashi,
     please give us the signal!
[05:27] K
    Sure.
[05:28] K
    On your marks,
[05:30] K
    ready,
[05:31] K
    go!
[05:32] K
    Ah, I forgot to tell them to hold back.
[05:38] T
    Not bad, Kanna.
[05:40] Kanna
    Impressive, Lady Tohru.
[05:41] T
    First!
[05:45] K
    You went overboard.
[05:46] Both
    I'm sorry.
[05:49] K
    Well, I guess it's time for lunch.
[05:54] Both
    Okay!
SIGN    Ocean
SIGN    Beach Hut
SIGN    Food Shaved Ice
[05:58] All
    Thanks for the meal!
[06:01] Kanna
    What's next?
[06:02] T
    Well... Miss Kobayashi...?
[06:06] T
    What's wrong, Miss Kobayashi?
[06:09] K
    Nothing. I just noticed that old man
    hasn't changed much since back then.
SIGN    Strawberry Melon Lemon Blue Hawaii
[06:14] T
    Back then?
[06:14] K
    Yeah. When I was still a kid,
    I came here with my family.
[06:21] T
    Family...
[06:23] (Flashback) Father
    Kill them! Kill them! Kill them!
[06:27] K
    What's the matter?
[06:31] T
    Nothing.
[06:34] T
    Miss Kobayashi?
[06:36] K
    Hmm?
[06:37] T
    Could you tell me more about your family?
[06:42] K
    Huh?
[06:44] T
    Please?
[06:46] K
    Well...
[06:49] K
    I think it was a normal family.
[06:51] K
    I was raised normally.
[06:54] K
    They had me go to college.
[06:57] K
    After that, I left home to work.
[07:00] K
    Every now and then I talk to my parents
    on the phone to tell them how I'm doing.
[07:05] K
    Oh, I haven't seen them in a while.
[07:11] T
    That's a normal human family?
[07:14] K
    Probably.
[07:15] T
    Then why did Miss Kobayashi
    accept a dragon like me?
[07:21] T
    Why would someone born
    and raised normally...
[07:25] T
    Why?
[07:27] T
    Does that mean...
[07:29] T
    the humans of this world
    could accept dragons?
[07:33] (Flashback) Father
    Kill them! Humans are evil! Kill them all!
[07:38] K
    What's wrong, Tohru?
[07:43] T
    Oh, it's nothing.
[07:46] T
    It's just, well...
[07:53] T
    I'm feeling listless.
[07:58] K
    Tohru.
[08:00] K
    Can I ride you?
[08:19] K
    This really is incredible.
[08:21] T
    It's been a while, so I'm excited!
[08:27] K
    Hup.
[08:33] K
    Tohru, aren't you homesick?
[08:37] T
    That's not the case.
[08:39] K
    But I feel like seeing my parents
    after what we just talked about.
[08:44] T
    Every now and then I would
    like to see my parents.
[08:48] T
    But it's all right.
[08:50] K
    Really?
[08:51] K
    Then what's bugging you?
[08:54] T
    I thought about introducing
    you to my parents.
[08:59] K
    You should.
[09:01] T
    I can't.
[09:02] K
    Why not?
[09:04] T
    Because I'm sure they'd kill you.
[09:08] K
    That sounds violent, but I guess that's
     common sense in your world, huh.
[09:13] T
    It is.
[09:15] T
    From my parent's point of view,
[09:17] T
    I'm definitely the weird one,
    not common sense.
[09:21] T
    It's sad.
[09:26] K
    Talking to Tohru about things like
    this is kind of heavy. And sad.
[09:33] K
    It drives home the difference
    between "understanding words"
[09:37] K
    and "understanding each other".
[09:39] K
    It makes me realize we've lived
    in vastly different worlds.
[09:44] K
    But maybe that's all the more reason I want
    to cherish this time we have together.
[09:52] K
    I think that means you've
    become independent.
[09:56] T
    Independent?
[09:57] K
    Yeah. You've developed your
    own unique set of values.
[10:01] T
    You mean I've become an adult?
[10:04] K
    Who knows?
[10:06] K
    I'm not sure.
[10:07] K
    Most people don't try to become adults,
    they just can't stay children any longer.
[10:14] T
    Oh, you've hooked something, Miss Kobayashi.
[10:22] K
    Tiny.
[10:29] K
    Shall we head back?
[10:30] T
    Yes.
[10:44] Both
    Dragon fireworks?
[10:46] K
    Yeah. I won them in a lottery
    at the shopping district.
[11:02] Kanna
    That's it?
[11:03] K
    Yeah.
[11:04] Both
    Huh?!
[11:05] T
    A real dragon is way better than that!
[11:20] Kanna
    Impressive, Lady Tohru!
SIGN    See, see! How's that, Miss Kobayashi?!
[11:22] T
    Shee, shee! How'f thah, Mih Chofahashi?!
[11:25] K
    I can't understand anything you're saying.
SIGN    Episode 7
SIGN    Summer's Staples! (The Fanservice Episode, Frankly)
[11:39] T
    What on Earth is this?!
[11:41] K
    The admission line for Comiket.
[11:43] T
    So we're supposed to provide
    cover for Takiya here?
[11:47] K
    Not cover. Help.
[11:49] K
    Apparently two of his sellers
    suddenly collapsed.
[11:51] T
    Leave it to me!
[11:53] T
    With my power, it will be easy
    to exterminate them all.
[11:55] K
    Don't.
[11:56] T
    By the way, was leaving
    Kanna behind a good idea?
[11:59] K
    There's a lot here that
    can't be shown to children.
[12:05] Takiya
    Man, thanks, you two!
[12:07] Takiya
    You're a lifesaver!
[12:08] K
    I owe you quite a bit anyway.
[12:11] T
    You didn't ask Mr. Fafnir?
SIGN    Water Dragon Shrine
SIGN    Bullet Hell Games
[12:14] Takiya
    Oh, he's participating as a circle.
SIGN    Curse Anthology
[12:17] K
    Huh?!
[12:18] T
    Participating as a circle?
[12:20] Takiya
    A circle's a group of people like us,
    who sell things they made to other fans.
[12:25] T
    I see. So why did Mr. Fafnir do that?
[12:29] Takiya
    I recommended all kinds
    of anime and games to him,
[12:32] Takiya
    and at some point he started drawing his own.
[12:35] T
    He's totally enjoying this world, isn't he?
[12:37] Takiya
    Well, Kobayashi-san,
    if you could handle sales,
[12:39] Takiya
    and Tohru-chan, if you could
    manage the line please.
[12:42] K
    Sure thing.
[12:44] T
    Hmph. All right then.
[12:47] Announce
    As of this moment,
     the third day of Comic Market has begun.
[12:59] T
    Wh-What's this?
[13:01] Staff
    Please don't run.
[13:04] Staff
    Please don't run.
[13:05] T
    Everyone's just barely on the verge of running!
SIGN    Desires
[13:09] T
    Something powerful is holding
    back their selfish impulses!
[13:13] T
    What in the world?!
SIGN    Water Dragon Shrine
[13:15] Participant
    The new one, please.
[13:16] K
    That's 1,000 yen.
SIGN    Water Dragon Shrine
[13:17] K
    Here, thank you very much.
[13:19] Participant
    The new one and the previous one, please.
SIGN    Water Dragon Shrine WA-91
     End of Line
[13:21] T
    The end of the line for
    Water Dragon Shrine starts here!
[13:24] T
    I'm sorry, please group closer together.
[13:30] T
    Hmm, for tens of thousands of
    individuals to be able take such
[13:35] T
    unified action without any
    prior exercises or training...
[13:38] T
    Something powerful must be influencing them.
[13:41] Participant
    Um, excuse me.
[13:43] T
    Yes?
[13:44] Participant
    Are you a cosplayer?
[13:46] T
    No, I'm not.
[13:47] Participant
    Oh, I see. I'm sorry.
[13:50] Participant
    I thought you were a cosplayer from abroad.
[13:52] T
    I'm a real maid!
[13:55] Participant
    Oh, I get it.
[13:57] Participant
    You're in character.
[13:58] Participant
    Wonderful.
[13:59] T
    No, I'm the real thing!
[14:01] Participant
    I understand your policy.
[14:03] Participant
    If you don't mind, could I please
    take your picture later?
[14:07] T
    I told you, I'm real!
[14:12] T
    The end of line starts here!
[14:16] T
    What incredible heat.
[14:18] T
    It feels like I'm in a fire drake's stomach.
[14:22] Clerk
    Thank you very much!
[14:23] T
    I can't believe it's this bad.
[14:26] T
    Comiket is not to be underestimated.
[14:29] T
    Still,
[14:31] T
    what in the world could be attracting this
    many people and keeping them all in check?
[14:37] T
    I don't get it.
[14:38] Takiya
    Tohru-chan!
[14:40] Takiya
    Hey, thanks for your help.
[14:42] Takiya
    Time to switch.
[14:43] T
    I've been waiting for this!
SIGN    Summer Homework, Science
    Please select one of the following.
    1) Sunflower Observation
    2) Bug Collecting
    3) Daily Weather
    4) Electric Circuits
    Sunflower Observation:
    Observe the growth of a sunflower every day!
    Bug Collecting: Catch bugs near convenience
    stores, parks, or nearby plazas!
    Paste the bugs you've gathered!
[14:52] Kanna
    Bug collecting...
[15:01] ---
    Crunchy...
SIGN    Grasshopper Moist
SIGN    Butterfly Flaky
SIGN    Cicada Crunchy
SIGN    Where did you find it?
SIGN    Let's Stick the Bugs We Found Here!
[15:10] T
    Uh, I think it's around this area...
[15:13] K
    What are you looking for?
[15:14] T
    Mr. Fafnir.
[15:16] T
    I figured I'd stop by since I'm on my break.
[15:23] Fafnir
    Say nothing.
[15:25] Fafnir
    I'll kill you.
[15:26] T
    You're the one who looks dead, Mr. Fafnir.
[15:29] K
    Well, that's what it's
    like for first-timers.
[15:32] T
    Can I have a look at your book?
[15:34] Fafnir
    Hmph, help yourself.
SIGN    Curse Anthology
[15:37] T
    Curse Anthology.
[15:41] T
    Th-These are...
[15:43] T
    You've printed real, effective curses!
[15:46] T
    Even how to inflict them...
[15:48] T
    You could curse someone to
    death if you read this!
[15:50] K
    Hey, hey!
[15:51] T
    Only 1,000 yen?! That's cheap!
[15:53] T
    This is a bargain!
[15:55] K
    Wait, it's way too dangerous
    to be selling that to others!
[16:01] T
    Still, there are a lot of cosplayers here.
[16:05] T
    There are a lot of humans dressed
    up like the races from my world.
[16:10] K
    They're having fun pretending to be
    characters from anime and manga.
[16:14] K
    You're practically the same, too, Tohru.
[16:16] T
    I am a proper maid!
[16:18] T
    No matter how you look at me,
    I'm your loyal sex slave!
[16:21] K
    That's not a maid.
[16:24] T
    Hmm?
[16:25] K
    What is it?
[16:27] T
    The sahuagin, goblin, and witch over there...
[16:30] K
    Oh, I wonder what they're from.
[16:32] T
    They're real.
[16:33] K
    Huh?
[16:34] T
    Those three are real non-humans.
[16:37] K
    Huh?!
[16:38] T
    Excuse me!
[16:40] T
    You're from the other world, right?
[16:42] Sahagin
    Oh? You, too?
[16:44] T
    Yes. What are you doing here today?
[16:47] Witch
    I came to spread my wings.
[16:50] Goblin
    I normally live disguised as a human,
[16:53] Goblin
    but coming to events like this
    lets me enjoy time in my real form.
[16:57] T
    I see.
[16:59] Sahagin
    Why not take the chance to
    enjoy your real form, too?
[17:04] T
    Oh, that's impossible.
[17:06] T
    I'm a dragon.
[17:09] Sahagin
    A dragon?!
[17:10] T
    Yes.
[17:10] Witch
    That damn monster?!
[17:12] T
    Yes?
[17:13] Goblin
    The one that could eat us all?!
[17:15] T
    Huh?!
[17:16] Three
    Run!
[17:18] Staff
    Please don't run!
[17:19] K
    Dragons must be doing some crazy things.
[17:21] T
    They're wrong.
[17:23] K
    Oh?
[17:23] T
    When dragons get hungry, we
    only eat as much as necessary...
[17:27] T
    And in the end, this world
    is the survival of the fittest, so...
[17:29] K
    You're not denying it, just giving
    supplementary explanation?
[17:32] Staff
    You there!
[17:33] Staff
    Come with me!
[17:35] Staff
    Your outfit's out!
[17:36] ---
    Huh? I, um...
[17:37] Staff
    Did you not read the participant guide?!
[17:38] T
    I guess Miss Lucoa came, too.
[17:40] ---
    Wait...
[17:41] K
    She never learns.
[17:43] T
    Now that I look closer,
    there's a lot more.
[17:46] T
    Beings in their original form, that is.
[17:48] K
    That many?
[17:49] T
    Yes.
[17:50] T
    Those with great presence have left records of
    their stays in this world on different levels,
[17:57] T
    like Mr. Fafnir and Miss Lucoa.
[18:11] T
    Uh, umm...
[18:20] T
    I'd like to return to my real form...
[18:23] T
    for a little bit.
[18:33] K
    As long as you keep it where
    it won't cause trouble, you can.
[18:41] T
    Sorry for the wait!
[18:45] K
    Oh, can I take your picture?
[18:49] T
    Yes!
[18:52] Participant
    Excuse me, can I take one, too?
[18:55] T
    Huh?
[18:55] Participant
    Oh, me, too!
[18:56] T
    Huh?!
[19:00] Participant
    Excuse me, can I get your
    eyes over here please?
[19:02] Participant
    Over here, too, please!
[19:03] K
    Oh, it's almost time.
[19:04] Participant
    Over here, too, please!
[19:06] K
    Oh, well.
[19:08] Participant
    Hello. I came like I promised.
[19:11] T
    Oh, hello.
[19:12] T
    Hey, are you okay?
[19:14] Participant
    Well, to be honest, it's pretty rough.
[19:18] Participant
    But I can hang in there.
[19:20] T
    Um, it seems like everyone here is being
    drawn to this place by something powerful.
[19:28] T
    Do you have any idea what that is?
[19:34] Participant
    Well...
[19:36] Participant
    I think it's something that only exists
    in this place in this moment right now.
[19:45] Participant
    And I think everyone loves that.
[19:58] T
    I see.
[20:01] T
    I understand that very well.
[20:03] Participant
    Excuse me.
[20:04] Participant
    Could you take your picture soon?
[20:06] Participant
    Oh, right.
[20:08] T
    Geh, there's another line forming?
[20:12] Announce
    As of now, Comic Market 90 is over.
[20:18] Announce
    Thank you for participating, everyone.
[20:21] Announce
    We'll see you again in winter!
[20:27] T
    I'm back.
[20:29] K
    Good to see you. We managed fine
    without you during the second half.
[20:34] T
    I see. I'm sorry for ditching you.
[20:37] K
    It's fine.
SIGN    We've Sold Out
[20:41] T
    Oh, Mr. Fafnir, how'd it go?
[20:45] T
    Poorly, it looks like.
[20:48] K
    So how was it? What'd you
    think of your first Comiket?
[20:52] T
    Well...
[20:58] T
    I reconfirmed my love for
    you, Miss Kobayashi.
[21:01] K
    Huh?
[21:04] Takiya
    Kobayashi-dono! Tohru-dono!
[21:05] Takiya
    You were a huge help today!
[21:06] Takiya
    I'm truly grateful!
[21:08] Takiya
    And I'd like to ask for your help
    as staff again this winter!
[21:11] T
    I'm done with this!
[21:16] Sahagin
    What will we print for our next thin book?
[21:18] Goblin
    How about a dragon maid girl?
[21:20] Witch
    Nice!
[21:25] K
    Free studies?
[21:28] Kanna
    My summer homework.
[21:30] Kanna
    What should I do for it?
[21:32] K
    Well, I think you should
    study something that you find
[21:36] K
    mysterious or would like to know more about.
[21:39] Kanna
    I see. Got it.
[21:46] K
    What are you doing?
[21:47] Kanna
    Studying you.
[21:50] K
    Huh?
SIGN    Next Episode
[23:26] Takiya
    Kobayashi-san, there's a lot of
    talk about Tohru-chan on the internet.
[23:29] K
    I bet.
[23:30] Takiya
    They mentioned you, too.
[23:32] Takiya
    They said there was a sales lady
    with dead-fish eyes.
[23:34] K
    Sorry about that!
[23:35] Takiya
    And they got turned on by those eyes.
SIGN    Episode 8
SIGN    New Dragon, Elma! (She's Finally Appearing, Huh?)
[23:37] K
    I just felt a chill.
[23:38] ---