E13 - Dual Confessions, Part 2

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:32] ---
    Tsubame?
[01:33] ---
    DUAL CONFESSIONS, PART 2
[01:33] ---
    Your play was amazing.
[01:35] ---
    Really? Great to hear!
[01:37] ---
    Thanks!
[01:40] ---
    Tsubame!
[01:41] ---
    CULTURE
    FESTIVAL
    COMMITTEE
[01:42] ---
    Your play was the best!
[01:43] ---
    It was really great!
[01:45] ---
    Wow! You guys all came to see it?
[01:46] ---
    I thought tonight's afterparty would be
    the best time to confess to Tsubame...
[01:47] ---
    Of course we did!
[01:49] ---
    Thanks!
[01:51] ---
    but it wouldn't be cool to push other people aside
    just to get Tsubame all to myself, would it?
[02:04] ---
    Love is war!
[02:08] ---
    CONFESSION
[02:08] ---
    The person who falls in love loses.
[02:09] ---
    CONFESSION
[02:14] ---
    Humans play the ideal version
    of themselves,
[02:17] ---
    keep their displeasure to themselves
    and deceive others in order to be loved.
[02:21] ---
    Therefore, those in love live in terror.
[02:24] ---
    Without having a single certainty,
    the one hiding their true self...
[02:28] ---
    must convey their feelings into words
    to someone who's also hiding their true self.
[02:34] ---
    Otherwise, we can never move forward.
[02:37] ---
    Even if that means I lose.
[02:44] ---
    Just as I thought,
    you're Arsène, aren't you?
[02:47] ---
    Why would you do something like this?
[02:49] ---
    Why do you think?
[02:53] ---
    I'm afraid.
[02:55] ---
    I have no idea what President is thinking.
[02:58] ---
    He's always so gentle...
[03:00] ---
    and yet today, I find him terrifying.
[03:03] ---
    I'm about to confess my feelings for him,
    yet I'm too scared to even meet his gaze.
[03:08] ---
    This will be my last culture festival.
[03:10] ---
    I wanted to cut loose a little
    since it's my last chance to.
[03:14] ---
    Last...
[03:16] ---
    Well, that's just an excuse.
[03:18] ---
    There's something
    I want to show you, Shinomiya.
[03:21] ---
    How often do you get to see
    an afterparty campfire these days?
[03:26] ---
    Don't you think anyone would kill
    for the chance to see it from these VIP seats?
[03:32] ---
    And having you by my side
    is icing on the cake, Shinomiya.
[03:41] ---
    Hey, you did corner the phantom thief.
[03:43] ---
    I should've gotten
    some kind of prize for you.
[03:47] ---
    Is there anything you want me to do
    or is there something I can give you?
[03:54] ---
    There is.
[03:57] ---
    I want...
[03:58] ---
    you to stay by my side forever!
[04:01] ---
    I want you to confess to me!
[04:04] ---
    I'm sure you have no idea.
[04:06] ---
    I'd always believed that life
    was just a process of enduring pain...
[04:12] ---
    only to find that my values had changed dramatically,
    thanks to my days in the student council.
[04:18] ---
    And the more I realize
    how kindhearted you are,
[04:21] ---
    the more I'm filled with self-loathing.
[04:24] ---
    The way I look at other people to gauge
    their usefulness without a second thought...
[04:28] ---
    whether or not they'd be beneficial to me...
[04:32] ---
    What a cold, hateful woman I am,
    with nothing but ugliness in my heart.
[04:36] ---
    It's as if it's being driven home to me.
[04:38] ---
    So I always question whether or not
    someone like you could ever like me.
[04:45] ---
    That you're only kind to me
    because you're kind to everyone.
[04:49] ---
    That my glee is only being fueled
    by the misunderstanding...
[04:52] ---
    that I'm special to you!
[05:09] ---
    Shinomiya! Is something wrong?
[05:12] ---
    Sorry, did I embarrass you?
[05:14] ---
    I'm a little worked up now myself, so...
[05:16] ---
    It's not what you think, okay?
[05:18] ---
    I'm not doing this to embarrass you.
[05:24] ---
    Hey...
[05:25] ---
    Come on, say something, will you?
[05:27] ---
    I like you.
[05:29] ---
    I want you to go out with me!
[05:31] ---
    I love you!
[05:32] ---
    What in the world
    is that cosplay outfit for?
[05:35] ---
    If only you hadn't told me
    you were going to study abroad,
[05:37] ---
    I never would've had to confess my love
    for you as long as I lived!
[05:40] ---
    That's why I want to make you confess!
[05:42] ---
    Don't you know
    that if you confessed to me,
[05:44] ---
    your success rate would be 100%?
[05:52] ---
    Hey, Shinomiya...
[05:54] ---
    Let me show you something awesome.
[05:56] ---
    I was saving this for later...
[05:58] ---
    but it can't wait any longer.
[06:00] ---
    SHUCHIIN ACADEMY
[06:03] ---
    I told you there was something
    I wanted to show you, right?
[06:09] ---
    Because I just can't make
    any compromises.
[06:12] ---
    Because I just can't put it into words.
[06:14] ---
    I thought I'd give you
    the most amazing gift I could think of.
[06:45] ---
    Do you get it, Shinomiya?
[06:48] ---
    This is...
[06:49] ---
    how I feel about you.
[06:54] ---
    The Ultra Romantic Campaign!
[06:57] ---
    It's a plan that he set in motion
[07:00] ---
    the day he turned in
    his application to Stanford.
[07:02] ---
    MIKO IINO - PATROL DURING
    THE HOSHIN CULTURE FESTIVAL
    KAREN KINO - INTERVIEW
    PRESIDENT SHIROGANE
[07:04] ---
    STUDYING ABROAD
[07:06] ---
    I'm gonna look!
    I'm gonna look now, okay?
[07:08] ---
    To determine his relationship with Kaguya Shinomiya
    once and for all on the night of this culture festival...
[07:08] ---
    I'm really gonna look now, okay?
[07:10] ---
    Just hurry up, will you?
[07:14] ---
    What should he do toward that end?
[07:17] ---
    What should he say?
[07:20] ---
    He had found inspiration in his daily life.
[07:24] ---
    Cosplay.
[07:26] ---
    It might be cool to wear some kind of costume
    to give it that festival vibe.
[07:34] ---
    Hmm.
[07:37] ---
    This looks really promising.
[07:38] ---
    Shirogane's sense of style
    was stunted back in eighth grade.
[07:41] ---
    FIND LOVE!
    FORTUNE-TELLING
    FOR BEGINNERS
[07:41] ---
    BALLOON ART FOR BEGINNERS
    INTRODUCTION
[07:44] ---
    Balloon art.
[07:45] ---
    Come to think of it,
    this is what our class is doing, huh?
[07:48] ---
    That was when a certain scenario
    popped into Shirogane's mind.
[07:53] ---
    Not bad.
[07:54] ---
    But actually getting it done
    is going to be a huge hassle.
[07:58] ---
    Whatever I end up doing, I have to ward off
    Fujiwara or it will be a lost cause.
[08:03] ---
    The best way to contain that one...
[08:04] ---
    This can't be anything
    but a challenge thrown down to me!
[08:08] ---
    A mystery.
[08:10] ---
    So, I'll cosplay as a phantom thief, and...
[08:13] ---
    I've come to claim the culture festival.
[08:13] ---
    I've come to claim your heart. Arsène.
[08:16] ---
    Warnings.
[08:17] ---
    If I'm not mistaken,
    in Greek, "arsène" means...
[08:19] ---
    "Masculine."
[08:21] ---
    I'm going to need hundreds of hearts.
[08:23] ---
    The Hoshin Legend.
[08:24] ---
    I'll insert them into a weather balloon...
[08:27] ---
    Balloon art crafting.
[08:28] ---
    ...and pop it to release them all at once!
[08:32] ---
    What did Iino say during the election?
[08:34] ---
    It used to be a yearly event
    until three years ago,
[08:37] ---
    but the neighborhood association
    has stopped granting us permission!
[08:40] ---
    Campfire.
[08:43] ---
    The hundreds of balloons that burst out
    ride the upper air current of the campfire...
[08:47] ---
    and hover dozens of meters aboveground.
[08:50] ---
    From a height, the view will be heavenly
    for the next few minutes!
[08:54] ---
    I'D LIKE TO HAVE
    A CAMPFIRE
[08:55] ---
    That's why I sent Iino and Ishigami
    to the culture festival committee.
[08:58] ---
    I made sure that there were
    as many food stalls as possible in Iino's path.
[09:02] ---
    And if I schedule
    Tsubame's play for a later time slot,
[09:05] ---
    then that will take care of Ishigami.
[09:06] ---
    These are Shirogane's behind-the-scenes
    machinations to make the culture festival his own!
[09:11] ---
    Everything he did was for the sake
    of ending up in this situation.
[09:15] ---
    All of this was what Shirogane
    had prepared for her.
[09:18] ---
    I don't have Shinomiya's intellect...
[09:21] ---
    or her competence.
[09:23] ---
    My family's social standing
    pales in comparison to hers.
[09:29] ---
    Back when we first met,
[09:31] ---
    I bet you didn't have
    the slightest interest in me.
[09:35] ---
    So I worked my tail off. I think
    I worked harder than I'd ever worked in my life.
[09:39] ---
    NUMBER 1 - MIYUKI SHIROGANE
    NUMBER 2 - KAGUYA SHINOMIYA
[09:40] ---
    That time when you were playing for keeps...
    I still beat your test scores.
[09:43] ---
    I couldn't have been more thrilled!
[09:45] ---
    You probably have no idea!
[09:48] ---
    Maybe, just maybe,
    I can become your equal!
[09:51] ---
    That hope roused me to no end!
[09:54] ---
    That's precisely why I can't ask you
    to go out with me.
[09:58] ---
    If I take the hand that you extend to me
    after imploring you to when I confess...
[10:03] ---
    it means I'll never be your equal
    as long as I live!
[10:09] ---
    I need you to want me
    and confess your love for me.
[10:13] ---
    Only then can I feel like your equal!
[10:16] ---
    That's why...
[10:18] ---
    I can't confess to you first.
[10:21] ---
    But...
[10:23] ---
    there's something I wanna tell you.
[10:50] ---
    Hey...
[10:51] ---
    Do you think maybe the phantom thief
    is up on top of the clock tower?
[10:54] ---
    What do you mean?
[10:56] ---
    He must've calculated the campfire's position
    and all to make the balloons drift that way, right?
[11:02] ---
    Huh? Why would he do that?
[11:03] ---
    To create an environment
    to confess to someone to, what else?
[11:07] ---
    Not in a million years!
[11:09] ---
    How many people even have
    that kind of authority?
[11:12] ---
    Besides, if the only ones with the key to the clock
    tower are the faculty and the student council...
[11:21] ---
    Well, well, Momo!
[11:23] ---
    You certainly seem sleepy.
[11:26] ---
    So do you, Principal.
[11:30] ---
    Hey, Ryuju...
[11:32] ---
    I want to collect all the heart balloons
    across the academy
[11:35] ---
    and stick them into this huge one.
[11:38] ---
    Can you help me out?
[11:39] ---
    Huh?
[11:39] ---
    Not on your life!
[11:41] ---
    Why should I even...
[11:43] ---
    Is that your answer? What an ingrate.
[11:46] ---
    Putain...
[11:47] ---
    Principal...
[11:49] ---
    I have the right to ask
    for two letters of recommendation, don't I?
[11:53] ---
    Since I don't need the second one, would it be
    possible to give that right to the vice president?
[11:58] ---
    Oh yes.
[11:59] ---
    As long as that's what you want, it's fine.
[12:02] ---
    Then, could you write a letter
    of recommendation for Shinomiya, please?
[12:06] ---
    She might be needing it right away.
[12:08] ---
    What?
[12:09] ---
    Right away?
[12:11] ---
    He can be too much sometimes, huh?
[12:18] ---
    Wh-Why are you laughing?
[12:20] ---
    Oh no.
[12:21] ---
    I had a feeling you had
    something in store,
[12:24] ---
    but I never dreamed
    it'd be something this ridiculous!
[12:28] ---
    Sure, but it did take a lot of work
    to get all this ready!
[12:32] ---
    That's why I'm laughing!
[12:35] ---
    Really... What on earth
    are you hoping to achieve by doing this?
[12:40] ---
    Even if you hadn't gone
    to all this trouble, I—
[12:43] ---
    Of course there's a meaning to this.
[12:44] ---
    This is all to lay the groundwork
    for you to grant my wish, Shinomiya.
[12:49] ---
    Your wish?
[12:51] ---
    Something more pressing and important than
    making you confess first or going out with you.
[12:59] ---
    It's...
[13:02] ---
    A once-in-a-lifetime wish from me to you!
[13:07] ---
    Apply to Stanford, Shinomiya!
[13:09] ---
    Come with me to the U.S.!
[13:12] ---
    TO BE WITH YOU FOREVER
[13:19] ---
    What you're asking is absurd!
[13:22] ---
    There's no way that my father
    would ever allow me to do so,
[13:25] ---
    and how insanely competitive is Stanford?
[13:28] ---
    Not to mention,
    it might be too late to apply now—
[13:31] ---
    You can make the deadline, Shinomiya!
    Come with me!
[13:33] ---
    Uh...
[13:35] ---
    Um, what shall I do?
[13:42] ---
    All right, then, yes!
[13:44] ---
    Very well!
[13:46] ---
    I, too, will go to Stanford!
[13:49] ---
    I-It's kind of scary to see you
    make up your mind just like that.
[13:53] ---
    What do you mean, just like that?
[13:55] ---
    I pondered hard with the intent
    to abandon my family!
[13:58] ---
    Also scary.
[14:01] ---
    Oh, it seems to me
    like my life's taken a dramatic turn!
[14:06] ---
    So many things to take care of!
[14:08] ---
    Um, I'm going to need SAT scores, right?
[14:11] ---
    Studying... Convincing my father...
    Or else removing all obstacles in my path...
[14:15] ---
    Really, there's so much to do,
    my head is spinning!
[14:19] ---
    All right, now what?
[14:20] ---
    Also... Also... How am I going to explain this
    to Miss Fujiwara and the others?
[14:21] ---
    I was hoping that Shinomiya
    would confess to me right around now.
[14:25] ---
    By the way, President,
[14:26] ---
    you did offer a prize to anyone
    who caught the phantom thief, didn't you?
[14:30] ---
    Yeah.
[14:31] ---
    Now that you mention it, I did.
[14:33] ---
    Can I ask for anything?
[14:35] ---
    What? Well, if it's something
    in my power to give.
[14:40] ---
    I'm going to hold you to that!
[14:48] ---
    I hope you all get burned to a crisp.
[14:51] ---
    Maki!
[14:54] ---
    Dance with me!
[14:56] ---
    No, thanks. Go on
    and dance with your boyfriend.
[14:59] ---
    I'd rather dance with you.
[15:02] ---
    Why would you?
[15:03] ---
    Because...
[15:04] ---
    you're supposed to dance
    with the person you like the best, right?
[15:08] ---
    Oh?
[15:09] ---
    You like me better than Tsubasa?
[15:12] ---
    Of course I do.
[15:25] ---
    Great, looks like everyone's having fun!
[15:27] ---
    This is the best party we've had in years!
[15:29] ---
    I wish Miko could've seen it, too.
[15:33] ---
    She's patrolling the grounds
    all by herself right now.
[15:36] ---
    That girl always gets
    the short end of the stick.
[15:39] ---
    You worried about her?
[15:40] ---
    You don't have to force yourself
    to be with me, you know.
[15:43] ---
    No.
[15:44] ---
    It's high time
    I weaned myself off Miko.
[15:48] ---
    Since it seems like I took away her chance
    to grow by being hyperprotective.
[15:55] ---
    Everyone's having such a blast.
[16:00] ---
    Hey, look at you.
[16:03] ---
    Ishigami!
[16:04] ---
    What do you want?
[16:05] ---
    I have something for you, Iino.
[16:11] ---
    What?
[16:12] ---
    I found it on the ground
    in front of the locker rooms.
[16:15] ---
    Lost items go
    to the Disciplinary Committee, right?
[16:17] ---
    Oh...
[16:20] ---
    You gave me a start there.
[16:21] ---
    Why?
[16:23] ---
    No reason!
[16:26] ---
    I also recorded this for you.
[16:36] ---
    Since everyone's so stoked
    about the campfire,
[16:39] ---
    I thought you should see it.
[16:43] ---
    You should've sent
    someone else out on patrol duty.
[16:46] ---
    You made it happen,
    so what are you doing here?
[16:51] ---
    Thanks, Ishigami.
[16:53] ---
    Everyone's smiling!
[16:56] ---
    That's great to see, isn't it, Ishigami?
[17:01] ---
    Yeah.
[17:07] ---
    And so...
[17:08] ---
    as this rollercoaster ride of a culture festival
    is about to draw to a close...
[17:16] ---
    If we apply the Polybius theory to the numbers
    we derived from the longitude, and then scytale them...
[17:22] ---
    You're just making that up
    as you go along, aren't you?
[17:23] ---
    You're totally trying
    to wring out a solution!
[17:26] ---
    This should be it.
[17:28] ---
    There's nothing here though.
[17:47] ---
    No way!
[17:48] ---
    It's a miracle!
[17:53] ---
    Is this a lookout tower?
[17:55] ---
    Left over from wartime, I guess.
[17:59] ---
    What's the view like from here, I wonder.
[18:08] ---
    Canaan!
[18:09] ---
    Karen?
[18:13] ---
    "Through the tender mercy of our God;
[18:17] ---
    whereby the dayspring from on high
    hath visited us,
[18:21] ---
    to give light to them that sit in darkness
    and in the shadow of death,
[18:23] ---
    to guide our feet into the way of peace."
[18:27] ---
    The Gospel According to Luke,
    Chapter 1: 78-79.
[18:31] ---
    Karen!
[18:45] ---
    What was it?
[18:46] ---
    What was it that you just saw?
[18:47] ---
    Hey, come on!
[18:48] ---
    Hmm...
[18:49] ---
    Let me look, too!
[18:50] ---
    The balloons are in the way,
    I can't see a thing!
[18:52] ---
    What in the world did you see?
[19:35] ---
    This is how I feel about you.
[19:46] ---
    HEART
    TO
    HEART
[19:46] ---
    HOSHIN
    CULTURE
    FESTIVAL
[19:46] ---
    LET YOUR
    BURNING
    LOVE
    REACH
    EVERYONE!
[19:54] ---
    There's so much to think about.
[19:57] ---
    I think I was able
    to let her know how I feel,
[19:59] ---
    but it's not as if I put it into words
    and asked her to go out with me.
[20:04] ---
    What's our relationship going to be like
    starting tomorrow?
[20:06] ---
    And there's also the matter of Stanford.
[20:09] ---
    I've got so much to think about!
[20:12] ---
    But that kiss at the end
    left such a huge impact on me,
[20:15] ---
    I can't get my thoughts
    in any kind of order!
[20:20] ---
    And then! And then!
[20:21] ---
    Tons of those small balloons went soaring!
[20:24] ---
    CHEERFUL CHEERFUL
[20:25] ---
    It was totally, totally gorgeous!
[20:27] ---
    THE SHUCHIIN AFTERPARTY
[20:28] ---
    There are numerous things
    I'd like you to tell me,
[20:30] ---
    but let me start by asking you this.
[20:33] ---
    The kiss...
[20:34] ---
    What was it actually like?
[20:36] ---
    I don't know! It was awesome!
[20:39] ---
    Is that... right?
[20:42] ---
    Did you know, Hayasaka?
[20:43] ---
    It's a lie that your first kiss tastes like lemon!
[20:47] ---
    President had just had a corn dog,
    so it tasted a bit like ketchup!
[20:52] ---
    Taste?
[20:53] ---
    A kiss has a taste, then?
[20:55] ---
    Well, why not? People eat
    with their mouths after all.
[21:00] ---
    But it did take a bit more time
    than I thought!
[21:02] ---
    It was easy enough
    to put our lips together,
[21:05] ---
    but after that point, things got tricky!
[21:08] ---
    After that point?
[21:09] ---
    Just hold on a second!
[21:11] ---
    The goal of a kiss
    is to put your lips together!
[21:13] ---
    There's no "after that point"!
    Just what did you do?
[21:16] ---
    Oh my! You're so ignorant, Hayasaka!
[21:20] ---
    You can't give the person you love
    just any ordinary kiss!
[21:22] ---
    KAGUYA'S
    KISSING
    ADVICE
[21:26] ---
    Let the lesson begin.
[21:28] ---
    See? As you bring your lips together...
[21:31] ---
    you go like this with your tongue!
    That's how grown-ups do it!
[21:34] ---
    I know for a fact
    that Miss Kashiwagi and Tsubasa...
[21:37] ---
    WAR CRIMINAL
[21:42] ---
    You didn't know that, Hayasaka?
[21:45] ---
    How cute!
[21:47] ---
    Id...
[21:49] ---
    Idiot!
[21:53] ---
    Today's culture festival...
[21:55] ---
    Having blundered at the very end,
[21:57] ---
    Kaguya loses.
[21:59] ---
    Huh?
[22:00] ---
    Right at the very end.
[22:02] ---
    Really, that's so like you, Lady Kaguya.
[22:05] ---
    Come to think of it,
    President still hasn't confessed to me!
[22:09] ---
    Do you still need a confession
    after you've already kissed?
[22:13] ---
    I wanna hear him say it
    so I can confirm it!
[22:15] ---
    After all, confessing his feelings to me
    shows how much he cares, right?
[22:20] ---
    I mean, of course I want the person I love
    to tell me he loves me!
[22:24] ---
    I get it.
[22:25] ---
    That's what I've been striving
    for all this time! To make him say it!
[22:28] ---
    I'm not going to give up on that now!
[22:32] ---
    I wonder if there's a good way
    to accomplish that!
[22:35] ---
    So at the end of the day...
[22:40] ---
    Lady Kaguya does want to make him confess.
[22:44] ---
    CONFESSION
[22:45] ---
    KAGUYA-SAMA: LOVE IS WAR
    -ULTRA ROMANTIC-
[24:28] ---
    Hello!
[24:31] ---
    The Tabletop Game Club
    has created a new game!
[24:33] ---
    Let's play it together!
[24:35] ---
    Huh? Hard pass for me.
[24:37] ---
    It's just another crappy game, right?
[24:40] ---
    Are you sure about that?
[24:42] ---
    I'll have you know that thanks
    to your critique last time, Ishigami,
[24:45] ---
    this is the new and improved
    Happy Life Game II!
[24:48] ---
    Last time?
[24:50] ---
    I wasn't part of that, was I?
[24:52] ---
    Come on now! For Miko's sake, too!
[24:54] ---
    Then just make Iino play it.
[24:56] ---
    You're playing, too, Ishigami!
[24:58] ---
    Please join us over here,
    President and Kaguya!
[25:00] ---
    HAPPY LIFE GAME II
[25:02] ---
    Well, well, I guess we'll have to.
[25:06] ---
    We're going head-to-head again,
    huh, Shinomiya?
[25:09] ---
    Yes, President!
[25:12] ---
    I'm sitting here!
[25:13] ---
    No, since I sat here last time—
[25:15] ---
    That has nothing to do with this time!
[25:17] ---
    Come on, you two, if you're going to brawl,
    please do it during gameplay!
[25:20] ---
    Oh, um, fine.
[25:22] ---
    So, I get the seat of honor, right?
[25:24] ---
    Gah! That's the same as me!
[25:25] ---
    The end.
[25:26] ---
    Don't bring back that horrible memory!