Skip to main content

E1 - Stone Wars Beginning

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names. This is handled on a best-effort basis depending on how the subtitle file was created so they may be incomplete or inaccurate. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Gen
    A long, long time ago...
[00:06] Gen
    Out of nowhere, a strange light
    rained down upon the world.
[00:10] Gen
    The entire world.
[00:27] Gen
    And that light turned everyone into stone.
[00:33] Gen
    After that, the world slowly collapsed.
[00:37] Gen
    The buildings and everything else,
    all of civilization, vanished.
[00:42] Gen
    After humanity had spent
    millions of years building it.
[00:45] Gen
    What a shame!
[00:49] Gen
    But there was one man who hadn't given up.
[00:56] Gen
    Even after he was petrified,
    he held on to his consciousness.
[00:59] Gen
    In fact, he kept counting the seconds.
[01:03] Gen
    The date and time are too
    precious to forget, he figured.
[01:07] Gen
    He's absolutely nuts.
[01:11] Gen
    And that man... was Senku-chan!
[01:18] Gen
    One summer day, thousands of years
    after humanity was petrified,
[01:23] Gen
    Senku-chan awoke, all alone.
[01:27] Gen
    He found himself in an empty, primitive Earth.
[01:31] Gen
    I probably would've died
    helplessly on the spot.
[01:35] Gen
    But Senku-chan is an awesome science whiz.
[01:39] Gen
    He made his own food, clothes, and shelter...
[01:47] Gen
    and eventually, he also made the revival fluid!
[01:52] Child A
    Senku's awesome!
[01:54] Child B
    I want to be like Senku, too!
[01:56] Gen
    The kids certainly love him.
[02:00] Gen
    Well, then, let's hear a word
    from our amazing leader.
[02:06] Gen
    Senku-chan!
[02:09] Senku
    Sure, whatever. That was absolutely riveting.
[02:13] Senku
    Your super stone world
    foundation story was epic.
[02:18] Senku
    I'm bawling over here.
[02:21] Senku
    Also, Gen, quit babbling
    and put your hands to work.
[02:26] Gen
    You got me. I was procrastinating.
[02:34] Gen
    So, he used the revival fluid
    to bring back this tough,
[02:37] Gen
    mighty guy named Tsukasa-chan.
[02:45] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    This is a stone world.
[02:48] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    An untainted paradise.
[02:51] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    We'll revive only the pure-hearted youth
[02:54] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    and live in a natural world owned by no one.
[02:59] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    It's a chance to purify humanity.
[03:03] (Flashback) Tsukasa
    Don't you agree, Senku?
[03:09] (Flashback) Senku
    Not at all.
[03:10] (Flashback) Senku
    Not even a millimeter.
[03:14] (Flashback) Senku
    I'm going to use the power of science
    to rescue every single person.
[03:22] Gen
    They ended up in a massive disagreement.
[03:26] Gen
    So while Tsukasa-chan is all like,
[03:28] Gen
    "Let's build a new world!"
    and reviving people to join him,
[03:31] Gen
    Senku-chan built a kingdom of science
    on top of this village in order to fight him.
[03:37] Child B
    We're the Kingdom of Science!
[03:39] Child A
    Down with Tsukasa!
[03:41] Gen
    Although, Senku-chan...
[03:43] Gen
    We worked so hard on
    the cell phone so we could
[03:45] Gen
    execute a preemptive
    strike on Tsukasa-chan.
[03:48] Gen
    Shouldn't we get moving? It's going to be
    spring soon, and they'll come knocking.
[03:53] Gen
    What are we making next?
[03:56] Senku
    Yeah...
[03:57] Senku
    That's why we're going to finish up
    this super science project item.
[04:02] Gen
    A super item?
[04:04] Senku
    We're going to defeat the
    Tsukasa Empire with agility and speed.
[04:09] Senku
    We're making humanity's greatest
    survival science product: space food!
[04:16] Suzu
    Sp...
[04:17] Shovel
    ...ace?
[04:18] Suika
    Food?
[04:21] Gen
    Here we go again!
[04:23] Gen
    Another craft that couldn't
    possibly belong in a stone world!
[04:32] Suika
    What's "space"?
[04:35] Chrome
    It's that place way, way above the sky.
[04:39] Kaseki
    This is starting to sound exciting again.
[04:42] Kaseki
    I can't wait!
[04:44] Kohaku
    It's just food, though, isn't it?
[04:46] Senku
    Yeah.
[04:47] Senku
    We're upgrading our favorite foxtail
    millet ramen to be fit for battle.
[04:54] Ginro
    Me! Me! I'll help!
[04:57] Ginro
    I want ramen so bad!
[04:59] Ginro
    Seriously! So bad!
[05:01] Kinro
    Ginro, what are you trying to say?
[05:04] Kokuyo
    But why do we need this
    space... ramen for battle?
[05:09] Kokuyo
    Ah! We're launching steaming hot
    ramen at the enemy, correct?
[05:14] Ruri
    I don't think that's it, Father.
[05:18] Senku
    There isn't any gravity in space,
[05:21] Senku
    let alone the room or time
    to sit down for a meal.
[05:24] Senku
    This stuff is quick to prepare and nutritious.
[05:29] Senku
    It's also small and light.
[05:31] Senku
    That's the super well-thought-out,
    precious food that is space food.
[05:36] Gen
    I see.
[05:37] Gen
    Tsukasa-chan doesn't want
    to attack in the winter
[05:41] Gen
    partly because he wants more men, but...
[05:44] Senku
    It's a simple problem.
[05:46] Senku
    In this stone world, a mega-cold
    winter battlefield is hell.
[05:51] Senku
    But we can overcome that
    problem with science.
[05:55] Senku
    A warm, proper meal that
    we can prepare instantly
[05:59] Senku
    would give us a ten billion
    percent advantage.
[06:02] Senku
    It's the ultimate weapon in a winter battle.
[06:04] Suika
    Warm science food is going to keep us
    powered up, in both body and spirit!
[06:09] Chrome
    Space food sounds amazing!
[06:12] Senku
    This is the final super item for
    our attack on the Tsukasa Empire.
SIGN    Foxtail millet
SIGN    Egg
SIGN    Fish
SIGN    Meat
SIGN    Veggies
SIGN    Ramen
SIGN    Rope
SIGN    Trees
SIGN    Portable containers
SIGN    Iron
SIGN    Level 2 blowing
    machines
SIGN    Gears
SIGN    Pumps
SIGN    Water wheel
SIGN    Vacuum devices
SIGN    Snow
SIGN    Space food
[06:17] Senku
    Let's get started!
[06:19] Kohaku
    Leave us to make the ramen.
[06:23] Kohaku
    Now that everyone in the
    village has come together,
[06:25] Kohaku
    we can be more efficient than ever.
[06:28] Chrome
    The maker team's gotta keep up, too.
[06:31] Chrome
    We're going to build a machine to
    upgrade that ramen into space ramen!
[06:36] Kaseki
    But how does this work?
[06:39] Senku
    We're going to vacuum the ramen.
[06:42] Senku
    We'll take all the air out.
[06:43] Senku
    It's the same as what we did before.
[06:45] Kaseki
    Ah, when we built the cell phones.
[06:48] Kaseki
    Those vacuum tubes were a real pain.
[06:51] Kaseki
    Wait, vacuum the ramen?
[06:54] Kaseki
    What does that mean?
SIGN    Ramen
[07:09] Ginro
    Sneak...
[07:12] Kohaku
    Okay, the ramen's done.
[07:15] Suika
    Now we just need to warm it up in soup.
[07:18] Senku
    That won't be necessary.
[07:23] Senku
    We're freezing it solid.
[07:27] Ginro
    Why are we freezing all this delicious ramen?!
[07:31] Kohaku
    The rules are the rules.
[07:33] Kohaku
    Stop talking and get to work, Ginro!
[07:54] Kohaku
    This is space ramen?
[07:56] Senku
    No, this is just frozen food.
[07:59] Senku
    We're going to lighten this to Hell and back
    so our troops can be even more mobile.
[08:04] Gen
    Lighten ramen?
[08:07] Gen
    You don't mean...
[08:08] Senku
    That's right.
[08:09] Senku
    We're making cup noodles.
[08:13] Senku
    It's the birth of freeze-dried food.
[08:17] Gen
    Freeze-dried, huh?
[08:19] Gen
    I've heard of it, but what
    exactly are we doing?
[08:24] Senku
    We're literally freezing
    it and then drying it.
[08:27] Senku
    That's all it is.
[08:30] Senku
    When you freeze food,
    the moisture inside turns to ice.
SIGN    Solid
[08:34] Gen
    Yeah, of course.
[08:36] Gen
    I get that much.
[08:37] Senku
    Put that in a vacuum, and the lack of air
    in the environment turns the water...
[08:44] Senku
    Poof! Into vapor.
[08:47] Senku
    That dries out the food and
    makes it super small and light.
[08:54] Suika
    This is all too complicated for me.
[08:56] Kohaku
    How exactly do we do the "poof!" part?
[09:01] Senku
    That's what the maker team's for.
[09:10] Kaseki
    It's done!
[09:12] Chrome
    Check this out.
[09:14] Chrome
    We used the water wheel that
    we suffered so much to build...
[09:18] Chrome
    to build a freeze drying machine!
[09:22] Senku
    I'm impressed, Chrome, Kaseki!
[09:26] Kohaku
    Everything here is made using things
    we built together with Senku.
[09:33] Senku
    Yeah.
[09:34] Senku
    That's what humanity did, working away
    diligently over the past two million years.
[09:41] Senku
    That's science.
[09:48] Senku
    We have freeze-dried ramen!
SIGN    m 0 0 l 0 -30 l 118 -30 l 118 30 l -118 30 l -118 -30 l 0 -30
SIGN    Space food acquired!!
[09:54] Chrome
    Yes!
[09:56] Chrome
    Wait, what is this?
[09:58] Kinro
    It does look small and light, but...
[10:00] Ginro
    Uh, it looks gross.
[10:03] Ginro
    It's all spongy and rough.
[10:06] Senku
    Just watch.
[10:13] Kohaku
    Is this really edible, though?
[10:16] Chrome
    Yo, I'll be the guinea pig!
[10:18] Chrome
    A science user never hesitates
    to jump on anything new!
[10:23] Suika
    You've said that before, too.
[10:25] Kohaku
    I'm pretty sure you just want
    to be the first to eat it.
[10:34] Chrome
    Yum!
[10:38] Chrome
    Is it just me, or is it even better than
    before, now that it's nice and hot?!
[10:46] Chrome
    Here you go.
[11:27] Magma
    Now we can fight and eat at the same time!
[11:32] Gen
    I don't know if that really gives
    us an advantage, Magma-chan.
[11:39] Ruri
    I don't want anyone to get hurt.
[11:43] Ruri
    We can't avoid fighting anymore, can we?
[11:46] Senku
    We aren't going to go kill anyone.
[11:50] Senku
    The victory condition for the Kingdom
    of Science is remarkably simple.
[11:55] Senku
    We just want to capture the miracle cave
    where we can gather the revival fluid.
[12:00] Senku
    If we can keep in touch with my friends
    on the other side using our cell phones,
[12:03] Senku
    we could even accomplish a bloodless siege.
[12:08] Kaseki
    Are these friends of yours truly safe?
[12:12] Kinro
    They've been infiltrating the enemy
    army this whole time, haven't they?
[12:15] Kinro
    Are they not in danger?
[12:17] Senku
    Not one millimeter of concern there.
[12:20] Senku
    Taiju and Yuzuriha aren't
    going to croak that easily.
[12:28] Ginro
    I wonder what they're like.
[12:29] Ginro
    Considering they're Senku's friends,
    they must be really, really smart.
[12:35] Senku
    Who the hell are these people?!
[12:37] Senku
    They look nothing like that!
[12:39] Senku
    Taiju's a simpleton who's
    in charge of brawny stuff!
[12:42] Ginro
    Huh?! Not what I expected...
[12:58] Gen
    It's become the official background music.
[13:01] Gen
    Amazing, huh?
[13:03] Gen
    Lillian-chan, the world's diva.
[13:06] Gen
    Everyone's in love, even in this age.
[13:08] Ruri
    Her voice is still so beautiful,
    even after hearing it so many times.
[13:12] Suika
    Everyone in the Tsukasa army
    should hear this record, too.
[13:16] Kohaku
    It's so pretty, I'm destroyed!
[13:19] Kohaku
    Maybe it'll convince them to
    stop attacking or something.
[13:23] Gen
    Lillian-chan's songs are way
    too familiar to modern people.
[13:28] Gen
    They aren't going to be destroyed by it.
[13:32] Gen
    Besides, with this audio quality...
[13:36] Gen
    This audio quality...
[13:56] Senku
    Just come up already.
[13:58] Senku
    What do you want?
[14:05] Gen
    Heya.
[14:08] Gen
    I didn't want the pure-hearted to hear.
[14:12] Gen
    Like Kinro-chan and Kokuyo-chan.
[14:16] Senku
    It already sounds like
    you've got a skeevy plan.
[14:18] Gen
    Good guess.
[14:23] Gen
    All we need is the record
    and a pair of phones.
[14:27] Gen
    If it works out, we can actually
    save seven billion people
[14:29] Gen
    in a bloodless siege on the Tsukasa Empire.
[14:33] Gen
    But if God happens to be watching,
[14:37] Gen
    Ishigami Senku and Asagiri Gen
    are going to Hell together.
[14:45] Senku
    Not to worry.
[14:48] Senku
    God's been absent in the world
    of science for ten billion years.
[14:53] Senku
    Let's hear it, mentalist.
[15:03] Gen
    I didn't want the pure-hearted to hear.
[15:07] Gen
    Like Kinro-chan and Kokuyo-chan.
[15:11] Senku
    It already sounds like
    you've got a skeevy plan.
[15:11] Chrome
    Senku and Gen? Holding a secret meeting?
[15:13] Gen
    Good guess.
[15:15] Gen
    Quiz time!
[15:16] Gen
    The secret to Tsukasa-chan's empire.
[15:19] Gen
    What's the unifying force
    that brings them together?
[15:24] Gen
    A: Food.
[15:26] Gen
    B: Hot chicks.
[15:27] Gen
    C: Tsukasa-chan himself.
[15:31] Senku
    C, obviously.
[15:33] Gen
    Ding, ding, ding! Ten billion points!
[15:35] Gen
    Tsukasa-chan's always been a popular figure,
[15:40] Gen
    with his "strongest high
    school primate" title.
[15:44] Gen
    Which means that, in order
    to break them apart,
[15:48] Lilli & Gen
    we just need someone who's as famous
    and popular as Tsukasa-chan.
[15:55] Lillian
    Hi! I'm Lillian Weinberg.
[15:59] Chrome
    A woman's voice!
[16:00] Chrome
    From that record!
[16:04] Gen
    I can kind of fake a woman's voice, too.
[16:07] Gen
    Although it's pretty tough.
[16:08] Senku
    No, that was close.
[16:10] Senku
    That was really close.
[16:12] Senku
    But it's going to be totally
    obvious that it's a guy's voice.
[16:17] Gen
    I know, right?
[16:20] Gen
    But what if the voice came over
    our low-quality, noisy phones?
[16:27] Senku
    And you're using the voice from
    the record as authentication.
[16:30] Gen
    Ding, ding, ding! A hundred billion points!
[16:33] Chrome
    What are they talking about?
[16:35] Gen
    Lillian's live singing, heard over the phone...
[16:39] Gen
    A powerful voice only she could pull off.
[16:43] Senku
    Well, it is her, after all.
[16:45] Gen
    You'd have to believe that Lillian's
    alive and on the other end of the phone.
[16:53] Lillian
    This is Lillian Weinberg
    calling from America.
[16:56] Lillian
    People of Japan, please hear me out.
[16:58] Lillian
    The world hasn't collapsed.
[17:01] Lillian
    The United States has already recovered.
[17:04] Lillian
    Help is on the way to Japan, as well.
[17:08] Senku
    So you're going to make a zombie
    Lillian to tell a big, fat lie,
[17:12] Senku
    and deceive everyone with false hope.
[17:17] Senku
    We're definitely going to Hell.
[17:22] Senku
    Okay, got it. We'll figure out the details later.
[17:25] Senku
    Let's go with that.
[17:26] Gen
    That was quick!
[17:29] Chrome
    What do you mean, "okay, got it"?!
    I didn't get any of that!
[17:37] Senku
    Tell him from the top, mentalist.
[17:43] Gen
    First, we deliver the cell phone
    to Taiju-chan and Yuzuriha-chan.
[17:47] Gen
    We very quietly let Tsukasa's army hear it,
    and play Lillian-chan's songs.
[17:52] Gen
    Thus we trick them.
[17:54] Lillian
    This call is coming from America.
[17:56] Lillian
    The world hasn't collapsed!
[18:00] Senku
    They all think the old
    world's been destroyed.
[18:03] Senku
    That's the only reason they're
    following their great leader Tsukasa.
[18:07] Gen
    Well, it is destroyed.
[18:09] Senku
    If they think there's help on the
    way, that changes everything.
[18:15] Senku
    After we make most of
    Tsukasa's army turn on him,
[18:19] Senku
    we coordinate using our cell phones
[18:21] Senku
    and conquer them in one swift move.
    Not a single drop of blood will be spilled.
[18:27] Chrome
    Wait, they'll figure out you lied later!
[18:29] Gen
    Who cares?
[18:31] Gen
    None of that matters once we capture
    Tsukasa-chan and Hyoga-chan.
[18:35] Senku
    Of course you'd come up with a ten billion
    percent underhanded plan like that.
[18:39] Senku
    It's exhilarating!
[18:42] Gen
    Everyone in the Tsukasa Empire is
    going to hate us to death later.
[18:49] Gen
    That's all.
[18:51] Senku
    Don't tell the villagers what we're doing.
[18:54] Senku
    We don't need any villains from
    the old world besides the two of us.
[19:02] Chrome
    What the hell are you talking about?
[19:04] Chrome
    I'm an accomplice now that you've told me.
[19:07] Senku
    You were the one who barged
    into the discussion.
[19:10] Gen
    Literally.
[19:13] Chrome
    I'm the one carrying out the plan, anyway.
[19:16] Chrome
    You're going to need a technician to deploy
    that giant-ass cell phone, aren't you?
[19:20] Chrome
    They already recognize you,
    Senku. This is my job.
[19:33] Gen
    Let's go to Hell together, the three of us.
[19:36] Gen
    But in exchange, let's save the world—
    all seven billion people.
[20:06] Senku
    All right, we're all set.
[20:11] Senku
    We have three task forces:
[20:13] Senku
    Chrome on engineering,
[20:14] Senku
    Magma on transporting the cell phone,
[20:17] Senku
    and Gen on navigation.
[20:20] Kohaku
    There's just one big problem...
[20:22] Kohaku
    The Tsukasa army scout, Homura.
[20:26] Kohaku
    Judging from the lack of snow
    on the branches on that hill,
[20:28] Kohaku
    I'm pretty sure she's watching from there.
SIGN    11.0 vision
[20:32] Ginro
    You can see that?!
[20:34] Kohaku
    Of course not.
[20:35] Senku
    That would be a good route.
[20:37] Senku
    It's a straight line from
    here to the Tsukasa Empire.
[20:41] Senku
    If they find out about
    our preemptive strike,
[20:43] Senku
    or worse, learn that we have
    cell phones, it's all over.
[20:49] Ginro
    What if we set out in
    the middle of the night?
[20:51] Chrome
    We're carrying vacuum tubes.
[20:53] Chrome
    It's all over if we trip in the darkness.
[20:56] Kohaku
    Could we outrun them?
[20:57] Magma
    Look at all this stuff
    we're carrying, dumbass.
[20:59] Chrome
    That might not work.
[21:01] Senku
    Not a problem.
[21:03] Senku
    We're going to lure Homura to the other
    side using a super science gadget.
[21:08] Senku
    The main force will move out in the meantime.
[21:11] Chrome
    A super science gadget?
[21:15] Senku
    If you run electricity through water,
    it boils up hydrogen and oxygen.
[21:20] Senku
    The mixed gas you get out of
    it is called a detonating gas.
[21:23] Senku
    Put it in a balloon, like one
    made out of a deer's bladder,
[21:26] Senku
    and you've got a wimpy bomb that
    makes an insanely loud noise.
[21:31] Senku
    In other words, a sonic bomb.
[21:37] Senku
    All right, here we go.
[21:38] Senku
    Time for our preemptive strike.
[21:40] Ginro
    Detonate the sonic bombs!
[21:53] Senku
    Now! Go! The other side!
[21:55] Chrome
    Go!
[22:01] Senku
    It's the final battle versus
    the Tsukasa Empire...
[22:05] Senku
    The beginning of the Stone Wars!
[22:10] Senku
    This is exhilarating!
SIGN    Next Episode
SIGN    This is a work of fiction, but the plants, animals, and production methods described are based on reality. Foraging and making things on your own accord is extremely dangerous and, in some cases, illegal. Please do not imitate without expertise.