10 - HAPPY Old Men

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:15] ibu
    K-Kyo-chan!
SIGN    HAPPY Old Men
[02:10] dogo
    Hooray!
[02:11] dogo
    First bath of the day!
[02:13] dogo
    Happy!
[02:15] waku
    It happens every day,
[02:16] waku
    but I think it's lovely that Ichiro-kun gets
     just as delighted about it each time.
[02:23] man
    He's a bit of a simpleton,
    but I kind of envy him.
[02:27] kiri
    Yeah.
[02:29] kiri
    Being able to enjoy the same
    thing over and over is nice.
[02:32] kiri
    Kyotaro is the same way, really.
[02:34] man
    He enjoys things?
[02:37] man
    By the way, where is Shuzenji-senpai?
[02:39] kiri
    Oh?
[02:40] man
    I was sure he came in before us...
[02:43] waku
    You think that might be him?
[02:46] dogo
    This is heaven!
[02:48] kiri
    Kyotaro!
[02:51] kiri
    Wake up! Open your eyes!
[02:54] dogo
    This is terrible!
[02:55] man
    I think he might need
    mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
[03:08] shu
    Achoo!
[03:11] dogo
    Did you sneeze in the bath?
[03:12] dogo
    You're not cold, are you?
[03:14] man
    That's your first comment?
[03:17] wak
    Shouldn't you be happy he's breathing?
[03:20] dogo
    Oh, yeah! That's right!
[03:22] dogo
    I'm so glad you're alive, Kyotaro-senpai!
[03:26] shu
    Was I sleeping in the bath again?
[03:30] kiri
    At the bottom of the bath!
[03:32] kiri
    That was a close call! I guess we can't
    let you in the bath by yourself...
[03:35] wak
    I can't believe you're a high-school
    student who needs a caretaker.
[03:38] dogo
    Ryoma-senpai, you need to
    be more attentive to him!
[03:41] kiri
    It's my fault?
[03:43] man
    Why are you constantly napping, anyway?
[03:46] waku
    Because it feels good, I assume...
[03:49] shu
    That's part of it, but...
    I think I like dreaming.
[03:54] kiri
    Escaping from reality?
[03:55] shu
    I don't think that's it.
[03:58] shu
    I like it when I'm dreaming, but I never
    really remember what I was dreaming about.
[04:03] shu
    I feel like it's something important...
[04:06] shu
    but I don't know what it is.
[04:08] dogo
    He's as forgetful as an old man.
[04:11] kiri
    He's always been this way.
    I'm used to it by now.
[04:14] man
    By the way,
[04:16] man
    did you know that the first bath of the
    day is the most dangerous one for seniors?
[04:20] man
    No one's around yet, so the room isn't warmed up,
    which lowers their body temperature.
[04:25] man
    However, the bathwater itself is all the
    hotter for having no one in it yet.
[04:30] man
    The change in temperature puts a strain
    on the body, particularly the heart.
[04:33] dogo
    What?! Then we'd better not
    let Kyotaro-senpai in first!
[04:37] dogo
    Strain on the heart sounds really bad!
[04:40] kiri
    That only matters if Kyotaro
    is an old man, though.
[04:44] waku
    Talking to Kyotaro-kun does sometimes
    feel like talking to a much older person.
[04:50] man
    I agree.
[04:51] dogo
    So do I.
[04:52] kiri
    I've been around him so long,
     I guess I'm kind of numb to it.
[04:56] shu
    But if I have to die,
    I'd like to die in a hot bath.
[05:00] shu
    It's so warm. Feels so good.
[05:03] shu
    I feel like I could just slip away...
[05:06] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai!
[05:07] dogo
    We're back to square one!
[05:13] shu
    Did I fall asleep again?
[05:15] kiri
    Yeah, you did.
[05:17] kiri
    Ryoma-kun, maybe you should give some
    thought to being Kyotaro-kun's 24-hour caretaker.
[05:23] kiri
    I'm starting to think you're right.
[05:25] dogo
    So you'll be roommates after
    you graduate high school, huh?
[05:28] man
    Given the active risk to
    Shuzenji-senpai's life,
[05:32] man
    I agree that a roommate
    situation might be best.
[05:34] kiri
    W-Well, I don't know about
    that exact arrangement...
[05:38] kiri
    I certainly won't abandon him, though.
[05:40] waku
    In other words, you'll be caring
    for him your whole life.
[05:43] kiri
    Why would you say that?!
[05:45] kiri
    What is it?
[05:46] shu
    The truth is, I...
[05:50] shu
    I wasn't first in the bath.
[05:56] kiri
    So what?
[05:57] shu
    I'm just saying, Karls was
    the first one in the bath.
[06:02] waku
    We're not taking about who was
    first in the bath anymore.
[06:06] dogo
    He's so far behind, it's kind of amazing.
[06:08] man
    Shuzenji-senpai's old mannishness
    really is exceptional.
[06:13] waku
    Well, I can't say he wouldn't fit
    right in with a group of seniors...
[06:22] shu
    What a pleasant bath.
[06:24] kiri
    He really would fit in at an old folks' home.
[06:28] kar
    Happy, happy!
[06:35] dogo
    Huh? That's odd...
[06:38] dogo
    Why am I so tired?
[06:40] dogo
    I feel like I've aged sixty years in a day.
[06:44] man
    That's not possi—
[06:47] man
    You're old!
[06:48] dogo
    You're an old man too, Taishi!
[06:51] kiri
    What's all the yelling about?
[06:54] dogo
    What's going on?
[06:56] kiri
    Wait! Look at that!
[06:58] kiri
    It's not just us!
[07:01] dogo
    Is this because we were calling
    Kyotaro-senpai an old man yesterday?
[07:05] dogo
    Some kind of curse?
[07:06] man
    You think Shuzenji-senpai got
    mad and put a curse on us?
[07:11] kiri
    No way! Kyotaro doesn't
    have the power to do that.
[07:15] waku
    Even if he doesn't have
    the power to curse people,
[07:17] waku
    he does seem to have the
    power to get wishes granted.
[07:22] shu
    That's right.
[07:23] shu
    Last night, I might have wished that
    instead of going to school every day,
[07:28] shu
    I could just space out as an old man.
[07:30] kiri
    So you did wish it?!
[07:31] man
    What are you going to do
    about this, Shuzenji-senpai?
[07:34] shu
    What, you aren't happy about it?
[07:36] dogo
    Of course we aren't!
[07:38] waku
    Ryoma-kun, it looks like you'll have
    to take care of all of us from now on.
[07:42] kiri
    Come on, I'm just as old
    as the rest of you...
[07:47] kiri
    But why did we suddenly get so old?
[07:52] mon
    They're aging at a nice pace!
[07:55] mon
    Now, go on, keep aging!
[08:02] kiri
    It's odd. I feel like...
    I'm getting even older...
[08:07] man
    We need to find the cause,
    or we'll be in trouble.
[08:11] waku
    It's true. Any older and it'll just
    ruin my character design.
[08:17] shu
    Too much trouble.
[08:18] kiri
    What, you don't mind the
    thought of getting older?
[08:22] shu
    Well, we could skip class
    and no one would get mad.
[08:26] shu
    I think I'm okay staying like this.
[08:28] kiri
    That's your reasoning?
[08:29] dogo
    I see! If you're an old man,
    you don't have to go to class!
[08:34] man
    I'd rather not sacrifice my youth
    just to get out of class, though...
[08:38] mas
    Wow, aging like that would really stink.
[08:42] mas
    I hope I stay beautiful as I age!
[08:45] dogo
    Oh, Martha!
[08:47] una
    My, they've aged even more
    than I was expecting.
[08:52] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro... it suits you.
[08:55] shu
    Huh? What does?
[08:58] ata
    I'm saying it suits your laziness.
[09:01] shu
    Yeah, I agree!
[09:05] waka
    If they're here, that seems to suggest...
[09:08] waka
    The cause of all this...
[09:09] kiri
    Yeah, it's that thing, right?
[09:12] kiri
    A m... m... mo... What was it again?
[09:16] dogo
    Ryoma-senpai, what's wrong with your memory?
[09:20] dogo
    You know what it is. A... m...
    m... m... What was it again?
[09:27] man
    Not you, too!
[09:28] man
    It's the usual thing! A m... m... m...
[09:34] shu
    Meat curry.
[09:36] waku
    Meat curry? Was that what
    we were talking about?
[09:40] waku
    I think I'd like to eat some meat curry.
[09:42] waku
    I think I had some meat curry this morning.
[09:44] man
    Now that you mention it,
    I think you did, Ichiro.
[09:50] mon
    Go on, keep aging!
[09:55] dogo
    I feel kind of tired...
[10:00] man
    You're a total old man!
[10:03] dogo
    What's that?
[10:05] man
    You've become even more of an old man!
[10:10] dogo
    What's that?
[10:13] dogo
    You've! Become! An old man!
[10:17] dogo
    Oh, shucks, have I?
[10:19] man
    It wasn't a compliment!
[10:21] kiri
    This is terrible! We just
    keep on getting older.
[10:25] shu
    What's the big deal?
    It's not that different from how we were.
[10:30] kiri
    But it is different!
[10:32] waku
    But Kyotaro-kun's way of speaking
    hasn't changed much, I'll admit...
[10:37] kiri
    I can't believe it.
[10:38] waku
    Maybe because he was the most
    like an old man from the start?
[10:43] kiri
    For better or worse... I'm not sure which.
[10:45] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai...
[10:48] dogo
    You've changed so much!
[10:50] shu
    Chiro, that's a tree.
[10:53] man
    Honestly.
[10:54] man
    You've always been a fool,
[10:56] man
    but you've gotten even worse
    in your old age, Ichiro.
[10:59] shu
    Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
[11:03] mon
    Well? You can't fight back in
    bodies like those, can you?
[11:07] waku
    I see something...
    but it's too far away to make out.
[11:11] waku
    It looks a bit like a head.
[11:15] man
    That's my head.
[11:19] kar
    He's currently in the depths
    of anger and suffering!
[11:23] kar
    We need to make him happy!
[11:27] waku
    That's right. What's causing this again?
[11:30] kiri
    You know, the m... m... thing.
[11:34] dogo
    The thing, you know. The... m... m...
[11:38] man
    The usual thing. The m... m...
     What was it again?
[11:44] shu
    Meat curry.
[11:46] kiri
    Of course! Meat curry!
[11:48] wak
    Is that what we were talking about?
[11:51] dogo
    That reminds me,
    I had meat curry this morning!
[11:55] man
    That's right. I think you did, Ichiro.
[11:59] shu
    Everyone, you're repeating
    the same things as before.
[12:03] kiri
    The same things?
[12:04] kiri
    That's right... we were talking about
    how you haven't changed much, Kyotaro.
[12:10] shu
    Yeah, we've been through that, too.
[12:12] kiri
    Is it possible... you haven't changed
    because you were an old man already?
[12:17] shu
    Nanao-san, you said all that before, too.
[12:21] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so hard...
[12:25] shu
    Chiro, that's a wall.
[12:27] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[12:30] shu
    Tai-Tai, that's a stairway.
[12:34] shu
    What a pain...
[12:38] kar
    What's he doing?
[12:41] kiri
    I don't wanna get any older!
[12:41] shi
    Second childhood, I think.
[12:44] kar
    What about him, then?
[12:46] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[12:50] shu
    Bragging about his old days as a bad boy.
[12:53] kar
    And what's with him?
[12:55] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai...
[12:57] dogo
    You've gotten so round...
[12:59] shu
    Suffering the vision loss
    that comes with age, I think.
[13:03] waku
    I get such a chill at this time of year!
[13:06] waku
    I always keep Chinese medicine
    on hand for my aching joints.
[13:12] karu
    And him?
[13:12] shu
    Boasting about his health conditions.
    It's common in seniors.
[13:16] kar
    Aging is pretty rough on you humans, I guess.
[13:19] una
    It's a little hard to watch, really...
[13:22] mar
    Can we put a stop to this?
[13:23] mar
    They're so ugly it's making
    my adorable eyes ache.
[13:26] ata
    Shut up for a minute.
[13:30] ata
    Why isn't he suffering?
[13:32] ata
    Shuzenji Kyotaro...
[13:34] ata
    You need... to suffer!
SIGN    Furanui Born March 26 Blood Type: O? Aries Hobbies: Collecting insects Likes: Strawberries, digging
[13:45] dogo
    I feel kinda tired...
[13:48] man
    You're a total old man!
[13:51] dogo
    Eh? What was that?
[13:52] man
    You're! An! Old man!
[13:56] dogo
    Oh, shucks, am I?
[13:57] man
    It wasn't a compliment!
[13:59] kiri
    This is awful!
[14:01] kiri
    We just keep aging!
[14:05] waku
    The season's so chilly, isn't it?
[14:11] dogo
    Kyotaro-senpai, you've gotten so square!
[14:15] man
    I was a wild one back in my day, you know.
[14:19] kiri
    No! No! I don't wanna get any older!
[14:24] mon
    Notice me already, darn it!
[14:27] mon
    It's me!
[14:29] mon
    I'm the one who made you age!
[14:31] mon
    Fight me already!
[14:35] kar
    We're not getting anywhere like this.
[14:37] kar
    I guess you'd better transform.
[14:40] kar
    As Prince of Honyala Land, I order you!
[14:43] kar
    Become Karls Knights Happy Kiss
    and save the people!
[14:53] kar
    Now, make your pledge with a kiss.
[15:04] kar
    Magic Knight of Flowers, Fiore Kiss!
[15:08] kar
    Magic Knight of Stars, Stella Kiss!
[15:12] kar
    Magic Knight of the Moon, Luna Kiss!
[15:16] kar
    Magic Knight of Snow, Neve Kiss!
[15:20] kar
    Magic Knight of Space, Spazio Kiss!
[15:24] kar
    Like the flowers that
    bloom across the world...
[15:27] kar
    Like the stars that shine in the night sky...
[15:30] kar
    Like the moon that illuminates
    everything below...
[15:33] kar
    Like the snow that gently
    embraces the land...
[15:37] kar
    Let's bring happiness to the universe!
[15:40] kar
    We are the magic knights who bring happiness!
[15:45] kar
    Karls Knights Happy Kiss!
[15:51] kiri
    We transformed?
[15:53] waku
    So we can transform in this state, too...
[15:56] dogo
    I guess we just have to
    beat the monster, then.
[16:00] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[16:03] mon
    What are they actually saying?
[16:07] shu
    They've got kind of a
     "let's beat him already" vibe going.
[16:12] mon
    So they finally want to fight!
[16:15] mon
    Now, feel my wrath!
[16:22] kiri
    Huh?
[16:23] waku
    No change at all.
[16:25] dogo
    I guess we just gotta beat the monster!
[16:28] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[16:31] shu
    Sounds like they're feeling pretty okay.
[16:37] mon
    I see! My attacks don't work
    because they're already old!
[16:41] shira
    He's so useless...
[16:49] mon
    Well?
[16:51] mon
    Being old feels awful, doesn't it?
[16:54] kiri
    It does.
[16:55] kiri
    It doesn't feel good at all.
[16:57] kiri
    We gotta beat the monster as soon as we can!
[17:01] man
    Hey, you jerk! I'm gonna pound you!
[17:04] shu
    They're kind of saying, "Are you so sure?"
[17:07] mon
    I don't think that's what
    they were saying at all!
[17:10] shu
    But are you so sure?
[17:12] shu
    I don't mind being an old
    man at all, personally...
[17:15] mon
    You couldn't understand...
[17:18] mon
    I'm in high school, but I have
    a face like an old man...
[17:22] mon
    so everybody just calls me "Old Man"!
    You couldn't possibly understand my pain!
[17:26] mon
    So...
[17:27] mon
    I'm making everyone older than me,
[17:29] mon
    so they can get a taste of how I feel!
[17:33] shu
    Personally, I couldn't
    wait to become an old man.
[17:39] shu
    I wanted to get accustomed to things like
    basking in the sun as soon as possible.
[17:44] shu
    There are lots of things that don't look
    "right" on you until you get older.
[17:49] shu
    I'm already used to those
    things, so it's fine.
[17:53] kar
    Now, everyone!
[17:55] kar
    Kyotaro, hurry!
[17:57] kar
    Kyotaro-kun, it's time!
[18:00] kar
    Kyotaro-senpai, hurry!
[18:02] kar
    Please hurry!
[18:05] kar
    Darn it...
[18:08] kar
    Now! Use your powers
    combined to make him happy!
[18:11] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:13] kar
    Yes!
[18:15] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:17] kar
    Yes!
[18:18] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:20] kar
    Yes!
[18:21] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:23] kar
    Yes!
[18:25] kar
    Are you happy?
[18:27] kar
    Yes!
[18:28] kar
    Let's happy hour!
[18:31] kar
    Return to happiness!
[18:34] kar
    Happy...
[18:52] kar
    ...and Turn!
[19:00] mon
    Oh, it came out. It's all out.
[19:07] shu
    Happy End.
[19:09] kar
    Happy Powder!
[19:15] kiri
    Hey, we're back!
[19:16] dogo
    We are!
[19:17] dogo
    Does that mean we have to go to class?
[19:20] dogo
    You'd really rather go
    back to being that way?
[19:24] waku
    Either way, it's a little
    too soon for us to be old.
[19:28] shu
    Oh? Who are you again?
[19:31] kiri
    That's Ojii Santa from our class, remember?
[19:34] shu
    Oh, "Old Man."
SIGN     Ojii Santa
[19:37] oji
    I see. Being an old man means
    I'm ahead of the curve.
[19:42] oji
    I guess I have some things others don't.
[19:45] oji
    Thanks.
[19:47] oji
    Old man, old man...
[19:50] shu
    Lucky. I wanted to be able
    to space out all day.
[19:54] kiri
    You'll get there. Don't worry.
[19:56] waku
    But you can rest easy.
[19:58] waku
    It sounds like Ryoma-kun will
    take care of you forever.
[20:01] kiri
    I didn't say that!
[20:03] shu
    Well, we worked up a sweat,
    so let's take a bath.
[20:12] una
    W-Well, nothing to be done about it.
[20:14] una
    Let's just try again next time.
[20:16] masa
    T-That's right!
[20:18] masa
    We can make as many monsters as we want.
[20:21] una
    Ata...
[20:23] shu
    So tired. I really want that bath...
[20:26] shu
    Oh, that's right.
[20:32] shu
    Ata!
[20:34] shu
    Why don't you come to the bath with us?
[20:37] ata
    Damn you...
[20:40] ata
    Why... are you saying that... after all this?
[20:45] shu
    What? What's wrong?
[20:50] ata
    Kyo-chan!
[20:55] ata
    You really are...
[20:58] ata
    This is what you always do... Always...
[21:02] ata
    You just drift through life,
    doing what you feel like...
[21:05] ata
    Doing whatever you want...
[21:07] ata
    You never even think about
    how anyone else feels!
[21:13] ata
    You're just going to throw that out there?
    "Come to the bath"?
[21:16] ata
    Like I'm an afterthought?
    It's so inconsiderate!
[21:22] una
    Ata...
[21:23] fura
    I understand your dissatisfaction and anger.
[21:27] fura
    Spread fear! Rise, Black Knight!
[21:36] una
    It can't be!
[21:44] una
    Ata?
[21:45] una
    Ibusuki-senpai?
[21:53] shu
    Oh? Ata?
[21:57] shu
    Ata-kun... became a monster?
[22:04] waku
    He's putting out a dangerous aura...
[22:07] karu
    This isn't good!
[22:09] karu
    He's putting out incredibly unhappy energy!
SIGN    One Centimeter to HAPPY
SIGN    Next Episode
[23:54] sign
    Next time: Let's happy kiss
    our way to One Centimeter to HAPPY!
SIGN    Wow, Ata-san, you're so mad. Seriously, what happened in your past?
SIGN    Time for the classic Defense Club second-to-last-episode chaos! Will production get it out in time?! (That's what you meant?!)