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E3 - The Documentary

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
    Hey, Blankie, I'm going to school.
[00:08] ---
    Oh, come on!
[00:10] ---
    If I sleep now, I'm in trouble...
SIGN    Peer Gynt "Morning"
SIGN    Ahh, I slept so well.
SIGN    Oh my...
[02:11] ---
    You! You! You!
[02:12] ---
    You! You! You!
SIGN    #3 "The Documentary"
[02:16] ---
    By Space Cat Company
[02:23] ---
    The Documentary
    On the Other Side of an Idol's Dream

[02:32] ---
    X Day of X Month
    A Certain Live Music Club in Tokyo

[02:41] ---
    Idol Producer PipiP...
SIGN    PipiP
[02:44] ---
    PipiP has sent numerous
    performers out into the world.

[02:49] ---
    The focus of her efforts right now,
[02:52] ---
    is her newest discovery,
    Pop-chin with the Tame Monkeys.

SIGN    Pop-chin with the Tame Monkeys.
[02:56] ---
    The hell are you doing?!
[02:58] ---
    - Stop smoking!
    - The hell do you think you are?
[03:02] ---
    Screw you, man!
SIGN    Pop-chin with
     the Tame Monkeys

[03:08] ---
    Listen, Pop-chin, will you shape up?!
[03:11] ---
    We're idols!
    Don't you know that?!
[03:15] ---
    Tell her too, Producer!
[03:19] ---
    Listen, Pop-chin. I think
    you should lose the cigarettes.
[03:30] ---
    Excellent, Pop-chin! You know
    exactly how to put out a cigarette!
[03:34] ---
    Err...
[03:39] ---
    What?! She's a chain smoker!
[03:41] ---
    - Yes!
    - Right!
[03:45] ---
    Huh? Who're you shooting?
    I'm not on display here.
[03:49] ---
    I told you people were
    interviewing us today, remember?
[03:55] ---
    I'm going to do my best again today!
[03:59] ---
    We asked PipiP.
[04:03] ---
    Why don't you lecture Pop-chin?
[04:08] ---
    She's going to be a top idol someday.
[04:25] ---
    If you wanna get it,
    come at me now!
[04:30] ---
    You two are holding Pop-chin back.
[04:36] ---
    In her search to find the best
    counterbalance for her star

[04:41] ---
    she kept switching the members
    of the Tame Monkeys.

[04:41] ---
    Panda! Gorilla!
[04:45] ---
    However, try as she might,
    PipiP was not satisfied with any of them.

[04:46] ---
    What is this thing?! Dog!
[04:52] ---
    Finally, PipiP came to a certain conclusion.
SIGN    The plan to clone lots of Pop-chins
[05:00] ---
    What is the plan to clone
    lots of Pop-chins?

[05:13] ---
    And the plan was put into action.
[05:18] ---
    Pop-chins were manufactured
    with unceasing speed in a factory.

[05:25] ---
    In time, there were so many,
    they threatened man's existence.

[05:34] ---
    Don't fall! Don't fall! Don't fall!
    Don't fall! Don't fall! Don't fall!
[05:43] ---
    We asked PipiP.
[05:50] ---
    Is this the ideal world
    that you envisioned?

[05:55] ---
    Whatevs.
SIGN    The Documentary
    On the Other Side of an Idol's Dream

[06:13] ---
    The End
[06:24] ---
    It's over. Throw in the towel!
[06:27] ---
    Sorry, a reggae fan took the towel.
[06:40] ---
    How do you like it?
    Isn't the color red so cool?
[06:43] ---
    Yeah, it'll camouflage
    the color of blood.
[06:48] ---
    I-It's a hybrid and very quiet.
[06:52] ---
    Yeah? Then I can kill without a sound.
[06:59] ---
    Oh man, I feel like working a side job.
[07:01] ---
    - I know a cool job.
    - Oh tell me! Tell me!
[07:05] ---
    Okay, you get paid in advance.
[07:09] ---
    Yay!
[07:15] ---
    - Here's the list.
    - For what?
[07:17] ---
    - Kill them.
    - Who?
[07:20] ---
    Bukubu.
[07:36] ---
    French baguettes are so popular in Japan.
[07:39] ---
    They're even better in France.
[07:42] ---
    In this segment, Popuko
     discovers real baguettes.
[07:52] ---
    French baguettes are so good!
[07:56] ---
    I know, right? Let's buy some for later.
[08:00] ---
    Unbelievable!
[08:02] ---
    I can't live without these!
[08:07] ---
    Isn't this a bit overboard?
[08:11] ---
    Is it?
SIGN    Bob Epic Team
[08:18] ---
    Bob Epic Team
SIGN    (New series)
[08:22] ---
    Oh, a lesser panda! How cute!
[08:26] ---
    Oh, it's trying to intimidate me.
    How cute!
[08:39] ---
    What?
[08:45] ---
    It was bigger than I thought.
[08:54] ---
    What're you doing?
[08:56] ---
    Listen to what happened...
[08:59] ---
    I was walking
    along the road when...
[09:01] ---
    The ground fell out from under me.
[09:07] ---
    How could that happen?
[09:08] ---
    It did!
[09:14] ---
    Bob Epic Team
SIGN    Bob Epic Team
SIGN    (New Series)

[09:17] ---
    I love the samba!
[09:19] ---
    Oh, mambo!
[09:22] ---
    Hey...
SIGN    Samba Master
[09:27] ---
    My casual mambo hurt
    the samba master.
[09:31] ---
    Olé!
SIGN    Flamenco Master
[09:36] ---
    My casual olé hurt
    the flamenco master.
[09:40] ---
    And this bonded
    the two wounded masters!
[09:47] ---
    A letter came today.
[09:52] ---
    Pop Team Epic has way
    too many lame parodies.
[09:57] ---
    Please challenge yourselves
    with more original content.
[10:03] ---
    That really hit me, right here.
[10:07] ---
    Gotcha!
[10:17] ---
    Oh, how cute!
[10:19] ---
    Nah, on closer inspection...
    It's really irritating!
[10:27] ---
    Your life will end in 30 minutes.
[10:32] ---
    1... 2...
[10:36] ---
    3... 4– Shit, the song started.
[10:41] ---
    5... Wait, was I on 5?
[10:45] ---
    10... 11...
[10:48] ---
    12... 13...
[10:52] ---
    14... 15...
[10:55] ---
    Wait, am I counting these seconds right?
[10:58] ---
    1... 2–
[11:01] ---
    1, 2, 3, 4...
[11:06] ---
    Right? Um... 6,
[11:09] ---
    7, 8, 9, 10,
[11:15] ---
    11... Hello? Someone help me count.
[11:19] ---
    How many seconds is 30 minutes?
[11:22] ---
    1, um, uh, er...
[11:26] ---
    Um... 30!
[11:29] ---
    Hello? Has it been 30 minutes?
[11:31] ---
    Or 30 seconds? What? How long–
SIGN    Preview
[11:34] ---
    I'm Sosogu Hoshifuri.
[11:36] ---
    I'm in an audition against
    Devil Volcano!
[11:39] ---
    Daichi and I are going to
    rehearse all alone?!
[11:42] ---
    Hoshiiro Girldrop - Episode 4
SIGN    Hoshiiro Girldrop - Episode 4 "Devil Volcano Appears! A Live Performance, Just the Two of Us!"
[11:44] ---
    "Devil Volcano Appears!
    A Live Performance, Just the Two of Us!"
[11:47] ---
    Fall in love again next week!
[11:54] ---
    Hey, Blankie, I'm going to school.
[11:58] ---
    Oh, come on!
[12:00] ---
    If I sleep now, I'm in trouble...
SIGN    Peer Gynt "Morning"
[13:52] ---
    Ahh, I slept so well.
[13:57] ---
    Oh my...
[14:01] ---
    You! You! You!
[14:03] ---
    You! You! You!
SIGN    #3 "The Documentary"
SIGN    By Space Cat Company
[14:13] ---
    The Documentary
    On the Other Side of an Idol's Dream

[14:22] ---
    X Day of X Month
    A Certain Live Music Club in the City

[14:31] ---
    Idol Producer PipiP...
SIGN    PipiP
[14:34] ---
    PipiP has sent numerous
    performers out into the world.

[14:39] ---
    The focus of her efforts right now,
[14:42] ---
    is her newest discovery,
    Pop-chin with the Tame Monkeys.

SIGN    Pop-chin with
     the Tame Monkeys

[14:46] ---
    The hell are you doing?!
[14:48] ---
    - Stop smoking!
    - The hell do you think you are?
[14:52] ---
    The hell's your problem?!
SIGN    Pop-chin with the Tame Monkeys.
[14:58] ---
    Listen, Pop-chin, will you shape up?!
[15:02] ---
    We're idols!
    Don't you know that?!
[15:05] ---
    Tell her too, Producer!
[15:10] ---
    Pop-chin, I think you
    should lose the cigarettes.
[15:20] ---
    Yo, you're smoking Ga**?!
    That's frickin' awesome! You rule!
[15:27] ---
    Hey.
[15:29] ---
    Cut off the end!
[15:31] ---
    -Yes!
    - Right!
[15:31] ---
    Get to it!
[15:35] ---
    Huh? Who're you shooting?
    I'm not on display here.
[15:38] ---
    Pop-chan, this is for TV.
    They're covering us for Yoasobi.
[15:45] ---
    I'm going to do my best again today!
[15:49] ---
    We asked PipiP.
[15:53] ---
    Why don't you lecture Pop-chin?
[15:57] ---
    Well, I need to look out for myself.
[16:15] ---
    I've been done with this shit years ago!
[16:20] ---
    You two are holding Pop-chin back.
[16:26] ---
    In his search to find the best
    counterbalance for his star

[16:27] ---
    It's your fault...
[16:31] ---
    he kept switching the members
    of the Tame Monkeys.

[16:32] ---
    ...that we keep getting shit on!
[16:35] ---
    However, try as he might,
    he was not satisfied.

[16:37] ---
    Weakling!
[16:42] ---
    Finally, PipiP found a solution.
SIGN    The plan to clone lots of Pop-chins
[16:50] ---
    What is the plan to clone
    lots of Pop-chins?

[16:55] ---
    Well...
[17:03] ---
    And the plan was put into action.
[17:08] ---
    Pop-chins were manufactured
    with unceasing speed in a factory.

[17:15] ---
    In time, there were so many,
    they threatened man's existence.

SIGN    We asked PipiP.
[17:40] ---
    Is this the ideal world
    that you envisioned?

[17:44] ---
    Bruuuh...
SIGN    The Documentary
    On the Other Side of an Idol's Dream

[18:03] ---
    The End
[18:14] ---
    It’s over. Throw in the towel!
[18:17] ---
    Sorry, $%#$%#&!
[18:30] ---
    How do you like it?
    Isn't the color red so cool?
[18:33] ---
    Yeah... Red's just not my color.
[18:38] ---
    I-It's a hybrid and very quiet.
[18:42] ---
    It doesn't run on just gas? Never mind, then.
[18:49] ---
    Oh man, I feel like working a side job.
[18:51] ---
    - I know a cool job.
    - Oh tell me! Tell me!
[18:55] ---
    Okay, you get paid in advance.
[18:59] ---
    Yay!
[19:05] ---
    - Here's the list.
    - For what?
[19:06] ---
    - Do it.
    - Do what?
[19:08] ---
    Take this golden gun.
[19:10] ---
    Goln Eye!
[19:26] ---
    French baguettes are so popular in Japan.
[19:29] ---
    They're even better in France.
[19:32] ---
    In this segment, Popuko
     discovers real baguettes.
[19:43] ---
    French baguettes are so good!
[19:47] ---
    Right?! Let's buy some for later.
[19:50] ---
    I can't even!
[19:53] ---
    These are perfect for skiing!
[19:57] ---
    Yeah, you're way too cool for school.
SIGN    Bob Epic Team
[20:09] ---
    Bob Epic Team
SIGN    (New series)

[20:12] ---
    Oh, a lesser panda! How cute!
[20:16] ---
    Oh, it's trying to intimidate me.
    How cute!
[20:21] ---
    Yay! Yay! Ya–
[20:29] ---
    What?
[20:31] ---
    It's so much fun going
    on a big, huge adventure!
[20:35] ---
    It was bigger than I thought.
[20:43] ---
    Why are you trying this hard?
[20:46] ---
    Listen to what happened...
[20:49] ---
    I was walking along the road when...
[20:52] ---
    Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye!
[20:52] ---
    The ground fell out from under me.
[20:57] ---
    How could that happen?
[20:58] ---
    It did!
SIGN    Bob Epic Team
[21:04] ---
    Bob Epic Team
SIGN    (New series)
[21:07] ---
    I love the samba!
[21:10] ---
    Oh, mambo!
[21:12] ---
    Hey...
SIGN    Samba Master
[21:17] ---
    My casual mambo hurt
    the samba master.
[21:21] ---
    Olé!
SIGN    Flamenco Master
[21:26] ---
    My casual olé hurt
    the master teacher.
[21:31] ---
    And this bonded
    the two wounded masters!
[21:36] ---
    Shit, say it with me.
[21:37] ---
    We've got a message from
    a listener named Bukubun.
[21:40] ---
    Yo, thank you very much!
[21:42] ---
    Pop Team Epic has way
    too many lame parodies.
[21:45] ---
    Please challenge yourselves with more
    original content. What do you think, Pop-chin?
[21:51] ---
    Well, we can't say much since
    we were made for this series...
[21:55] ---
    But yeah, you've got a point.
[22:02] ---
    Cuckoo, cuckoo.
[22:05] ---
    Cuckoo, cuckoo.
[22:08] ---
    Oh, how cute!
[22:09] ---
    Actually, you're exactly what I'm into!
[22:15] ---
    And that's why...
[22:18] ---
    I have to destroy you with my own hands.
SIGN    Preview
[23:24] ---
    I'm Sosogu Hoshifuri.
[23:26] ---
    I'm in an audition against
    Devil Volcano!
[23:29] ---
    Daichi and I are going to
    rehearse all alone?!
[23:32] ---
    Hoshiiro Girldrop - Episode 4
SIGN    Hoshiiro Girldrop - Episode 4 "Devil Volcano Appears! A Live Performance, Just the Two of Us!"
[23:34] ---
    "Devil Volcano Appears!
    A Live Performance, Just the Two of Us!"
[23:37] ---**
    Fall in love again next week!