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5 - This Time, the SAGA is a Serious Battle

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:12] ---
    So Maria's a teacher,
    but all she eats is potato chips.
[00:16] ---
    Just eating junk food is
    bad for your health, you know?
[00:20] ---
    It's not like we eat decent food...
[00:23] ---
    Did you say something?
[00:25] ---
    You travel in the company
    of the great Night Tribe.
[00:29] ---
    Frolicking with an agent of the
    hated church can only lead to disaster.
[00:45] ---
    As my other half is awake,
[00:48] ---
    I too have roused from my long slumber.
[00:51] ---
    You're up early, Kobato.
[00:54] ---
    It looks like you've devised an
    elaborate offering this morning.
[00:58] ---
    It's not all for breakfast.
[01:00] ---
    A lot's for lunch.
[01:01] ---
    Really? What's gotten
    into you, Bro... my kindred?
[01:06] ---
    Does this mean you've finally
    recognized my greatness and respect me?
[01:11] ---
    I thought I told you yesterday...
[01:13] ---
    That Maria girl doesn't eat real food,
[01:16] ---
    so I thought I'd make her lunch or something.
[01:20] ---
    Of course, I made enough for you too, Kobato.
[01:24] ---
    So that Maria girl comes first
    and my offering is an afterthought?
[01:28] ---
    What was that?
[01:29] ---
    Nothing!
[01:32] ---
    Hey! Where are you going?
[01:33] ---
    Breakfast is ready... Kobato!
[01:37] ---
    Stupid brother...
[01:50] ---
    QUIVER
[01:51] ---
    Vigorously bursting with goodness
[01:53] ---
    You know, that's surprisingly addicting
[01:55] ---
    Let's get the ball rolling
    while you're idly acting shy!

[01:59] ---
    Let's make friends and play, yeah!
[02:07] ---
    "Haganai"
[02:11] ---
    I look cool, but I'm actually super lonely
[02:14] ---
    (My delusions went bye, bye, bye
    Best friends are a nope, nope, nope, nope)

[02:18] ---
    I'm not held back any, but this isn't enough
[02:21] ---
    (Is a happy life in the real world far, far, far away?
    Best friends are a nope, nope, nope, nope)

[02:25] ---
    If a group of unlucky
    people gathered together,

[02:32] ---
    Ah--I can't picture it
[02:34] ---
    This situation is like stepping on a mine!
[02:40] ---
    FIDGET
[02:41] ---
    I totally, totally want to take a peek
[02:43] ---
    I don't want to regret this 100 times
[02:45] ---
    Totally toss aside and
    shake off that boring pride

[02:48] ---
    Unfortunately, this idea popped into my mind,
    and you know, it's surprisingly addicting

[02:52] ---
    Let's find some as we
    clash and rattle each other!

[02:57] ---
    Let's make friends and play, yeah!
[03:01] ---
    I totally, totally want to take a peek
[03:04] ---
    You! Toss aside and shake yourself off
[03:08] ---
    Yes! Well? What do you think of that?
[03:12] ---
    "This Time, the SAGA is a Serious Battle"
[03:18] ---
    Hey! What are you doing here so early?
[03:20] ---
    Again? Just eating potato
    chips is bad for your body.
[03:24] ---
    Don't worry about it!
    The sisters' food is as disgusting as poo!
[03:28] ---
    Look at this!
[03:30] ---
    Whoa!
[03:31] ---
    When'd you stock up like this?
[03:33] ---
    Yozora gives them to me when I work for her!
[03:36] ---
    What are you, a pack mule?
[03:38] ---
    I shouldn't be surprised...
[03:39] ---
    Here.
[03:44] ---
    D-Did you make this, Kodaka?
[03:47] ---
    You're giving it to me?
[03:49] ---
    W-What are you after?
[03:51] ---
    Higher social standing? Glory?
[03:53] ---
    I don't need anything!
[03:55] ---
    Just give me back the box when you're done.
[03:57] ---
    I'll make you lunch tomorrow, too.
[04:00] ---
    Why are you being so nice to me, Kodaka?
[04:03] ---
    Are you really an apostle of God?
[04:06] ---
    Somehow, Maria, you remind me
    of my sister when she was little...
[04:10] ---
    I just can't leave you alone.
[04:13] ---
    Kodaka, you have a younger sister?
[04:16] ---
    No wonder you seem
    like the "big brother" type...
[04:19] ---
    Yeah, well...
[04:20] ---
    Anyway, I gotta get back to class.
[04:23] ---
    Don't just eat potato chips, now.
[04:25] ---
    Got it, Big Brother!
[04:29] ---
    Big Brother...?
[04:31] ---
    And so, rumor has it that Kodaka
    eats his lunch before lunchtime.
[04:38] ---
    I apologize, Aniki.
[04:40] ---
    My snack didn't satisfy your hunger?
[04:43] ---
    That's not it... Thank you.
[04:46] ---
    Big Brother!
[04:48] ---
    You know what? That lunch
    you made me was super-delicious!
[04:51] ---
    The potato chips that Yozora
    gives me are like poo in comparison!
[04:54] ---
    Poopy Yozora only knows how
    to give poo! Dummy! Dummy!
[04:57] ---
    Oh?!
[04:59] ---
    I didn't mean it!
[04:59] ---
    Potato chips are good, too!
[05:01] ---
    Hmph!
[05:02] ---
    Kodaka, if you're having a
    little girl call you "Big Brother,"
[05:04] ---
    does that mean you have
    a little sister fetish?
[05:07] ---
    I'm not making her call me anything!
[05:10] ---
    Kodaka really is a big brother,
    so I'm gonna call him that, too!
[05:20] ---
    I wish I could go inside the game...
[05:24] ---
    N-No!
[05:26] ---
    That was only a joke... I mean,
    I just wanted to try saying that.
[05:30] ---
    Sena-sempai, Rika can't
    get you inside the game,
[05:34] ---
    but she's got a game where
    you can have a similar experience.
[05:38] ---
    Really?
[05:40] ---
    Why do you have something like that?
[05:42] ---
    After Rika helped them develop it,
    they gave her a copy of the prototype.
[05:46] ---
    Do you want to try it?
[05:47] ---
    Yes! Yes, I do!
[05:51] ---
    You put this on?
[05:52] ---
    That's right. It's the
    newest head-mounted display
[05:55] ---
    from the international company Largehard.
[05:57] ---
    When the time is ripe, they
    may release it around the world.
[06:01] ---
    And this is a demo version
    of the exclusive software
[06:05] ---
    they plan to release alongside it,
[06:08] ---
    the 3D fantasy RPG, Romancing sAgA 14!
[06:11] ---
    Why "Saga"?
[06:13] ---
    Because the company is in Saga Prefecture.
[06:14] ---
    That's the reason?
[06:15] ---
    What the hell?!
[06:20] ---
    It's pitch black! I can't see anything!
[06:22] ---
    Please wait just a moment
    while the software boots up.
[06:39] ---
    Saga...
[06:40] ---
    It is the final frontier.
[06:42] ---
    Why?!
[06:44] ---
    In order to bring an end to this
    world, the reigning governor of Saga
[06:48] ---
    has summoned the Prince of
    Darkness from another dimension
[06:51] ---
    and plotted to use his
    power to destroy the Earth...
[06:55] ---
    The opening is long, so
    Rika is going to skip it, okay?
[06:57] ---
    Hey! I'm really curious about
    Valhalla Castle in Saga Prefecture!
[07:01] ---
    We're skipping ahead.
[07:02] ---
    First, character creation, but
    all you can do is choose a job.
[07:05] ---
    Pick whatever you like.
[07:06] ---
    "Romancing sAgA 14"
    Valhalla Castle...
[07:09] ---
    "Thief"
[07:09] ---
    "Trade Choices"
[07:10] ---
    "Knight"
[07:11] ---
    "Samurai"
[07:11] ---
    Um...
[07:13] ---
    "Samurai"
[07:13] ---
    "Trade Choices"
[07:14] ---
    "Wizard"
[07:14] ---
    Maybe I'll be this...
[07:19] ---
    Kodaka-sempai...
[07:23] ---
    Whoa. That's some outfit!
[07:25] ---
    Rika chose "Gunner"
    and this is what it gave her.
[07:28] ---
    Sempai, you look pretty impressive yourself.
[07:30] ---
    Really?
[07:32] ---
    If you select "equipment" from the
    menu, you can see what you look like.
[07:38] ---
    What the hell is this?!
[07:40] ---
    I chose "Wizard"!
[07:42] ---
    There's an urban legend on the Net that says,
[07:46] ---
    "If you remain a virgin 'til the
    age of 30, you can become a wizard!"
[07:50] ---
    Your character is a man
    who became a great wizard!
[07:53] ---
    I don't wanna be that kind of wizard!
[07:54] ---
    "You haven't learned any magic yet."
[07:55] ---
    And this guy doesn't even know any magic!
[07:58] ---
    It says "Wizard," but Rika
    guesses it's in name only, huh?
[08:00] ---
    That's no kind of job!
[08:02] ---
    What's with your outfit?
[08:09] ---
    I wouldn't talk... Sena.
[08:13] ---
    W-Wait a second...
[08:16] ---
    What is this?!
[08:17] ---
    I chose "Blacksmith"!
[08:19] ---
    Now that you mention it, it does
    kinda look like a blacksmith's outfit.
[08:21] ---
    It does not!
[08:23] ---
    A blacksmith wears clothes
    that are more refined
[08:26] ---
    and a sword that's called forth by magic...
[08:29] ---
    ...which gracefully cuts
    the enemy into pieces!
[08:31] ---
    What world has a blacksmith like that?
[08:33] ---
    Man... I screwed up.
[08:36] ---
    This must be the job that's
    least suited to me.
[08:39] ---
    Quit your bitching, Meat!
[08:42] ---
    What's that?!
[08:50] ---
    I chose "Rose Girl."
[08:53] ---
    It looks like the developer
    just threw that together, huh?
[08:56] ---
    But that class actually has high levels
[08:58] ---
    of both attack ability and magical defense.
[09:01] ---
    Well, as long as I'm strong...
[09:05] ---
    So you like that, Yozora?
[09:08] ---
    Hmph. Not especially...
[09:10] ---
    Aniki, what do you think about mine?
[09:13] ---
    Well, uh... You look strong.
[09:16] ---
    You're a "Samurai," aren't you, Yukimura-san?
[09:18] ---
    Wait a sec. Sena, Yozora,
    and Yukimura are the tanks,
[09:22] ---
    Rika is the long-distance
    attacker... and what am I?
[09:25] ---
    Kodaka-sempai, you're
    the "slacker," Rika supposes.
[09:28] ---
    I'm a "slacker," huh?
[09:31] ---
    Then nobody is the healer...
[09:33] ---
    I'm here!
[09:36] ---
    Maria?
[09:37] ---
    Maria-san, you chose "Sister," huh?
[09:40] ---
    That's a rear-guard healing position.
[09:42] ---
    I feel like I've seen
    that before somewhere...
[09:45] ---
    An acolyte of God is
    always an acolyte of God!
[09:50] ---
    Now that we're all here, shall we go?
[09:56] ---
    Everyone, we're here.
[09:58] ---
    That's Valhalla Castle,
    where the Prince of Darkness is!
[10:01] ---
    This offline mode is like
    a tutorial that ends
[10:03] ---
    once you defeat the Prince of Darkness.
[10:05] ---
    The Prince of Darkness
    can be defeated in a tutorial?
[10:08] ---
    Well, it is a Saga Prefecture
    Prince of Darkness...
[10:15] ---
    Looks like we've got monsters.
[10:17] ---
    What are these aliens?
[10:18] ---
    They're totally disgusting...
[10:20] ---
    They look just like poo!
[10:24] ---
    Dragon Gobies... They're
    Dragon Gobies, aren't they?!
[10:27] ---
    What the hell are "Dragon Gobies"?
[10:29] ---
    "Ariake Sea"
[10:29] ---
    Fish that inhabit the Ariake Sea in Kyushu.
[10:32] ---
    I ate 'em when we lived in Kyushu!
[10:35] ---
    You ate them?
[10:37] ---
    I can picture it, Aniki...
[10:39] ---
    They're "Dragon Gobie Soldiers,"
    the first of the small fry...
[10:43] ---
    They were put into the game
    because they look like aliens.
[10:46] ---
    Because of the way they look...
[10:47] ---
    Well, I'm gonna start a-killin'!
[10:50] ---
    Wait!
[10:51] ---
    Don't you feel sorry for them,
[10:52] ---
    being treated like monsters
    just because of the way they look?!
[10:55] ---
    The Dragon Gobies didn't
    ask to be born looking like this!
[10:59] ---
    Please, won't you just
    let them go on their way?!
[11:03] ---
    You're kind, Kodaka-sempai.
[11:06] ---
    You identify with their situation, don't you?
[11:09] ---
    Big Brother is a good person.
[11:12] ---
    Well, I guess that's just like you...
[11:16] ---
    Everyone!
[11:20] ---
    Eat this!
[11:22] ---
    D-Dragon Gobies!
[11:24] ---
    Why?! Why are you killing them?
[11:28] ---
    Come on, they're gross!
[11:30] ---
    Rika understands how you feel, but we
    can't move on until we get rid of them!
[11:34] ---
    Their deaths serve a purpose!
[11:35] ---
    They'll continue to live on
    inside us, as experience points!
[11:39] ---
    Begone, demon!
[11:44] ---
    This is samurai-like mercy.
[11:47] ---
    W-Why don't they attack?
[11:50] ---
    It's an unfinished product, so it looks like
[11:52] ---
    they haven't programmed
    the enemy attack patterns.
[11:57] ---
    I-It's too sad... Poor Dragon Gobies!
[12:02] ---
    They look scary, but they're delicious!
[12:08] ---
    Sounds like we've leveled up.
[12:10] ---
    Aniki, my skills have increased.
[12:12] ---
    I've learned magic!
[12:14] ---
    Did I get experience points too,
    even though I didn't fight?
[12:17] ---
    Yes, since we're all in the same party.
[12:18] ---
    "Believing in Tomorrow"
[12:19] ---
    I got a skill!
[12:21] ---
    Let's see...
[12:22] ---
    "Nothing will happen just from believing.
[12:25] ---
    Nothing will change in reality
    unless you actually take action"...
[12:31] ---
    Screw you...
[12:38] ---
    And so...
[12:39] ---
    ...we dispatched a variety
    of Dragon Gobie monsters...
[12:43] ---
    ...and finally arrived at Valhalla Castle.
[12:54] ---
    It's big...
[12:58] ---
    The Prince of Darkness
    is a Dragon Gobie too?!
[13:00] ---
    They must've used the same model!
[13:07] ---
    What kind of Prince of Darkness
    catches you off-guard with an attack?!
[13:10] ---
    It seems they haven't put
    in the dialog for him yet!
[13:14] ---
    Tough-skinned!
[13:21] ---
    Sena! Are you okay?
[13:24] ---
    It doesn't hurt... but I lost
    almost half my hit points.
[13:28] ---
    That's right! A time
    like this calls for healing!
[13:30] ---
    Where's Maria?
[13:33] ---
    Maria... What's wrong? Maria!
[13:36] ---
    Sempai, wait a moment, please.
[13:42] ---
    Maria-san is sleeping on the sofa.
[13:47] ---
    Useless little girl...
[13:49] ---
    You can say that again!
    But the fight's not interesting
[13:51] ---
    unless you can succeed like this.
[13:53] ---
    Meat! If I use my "Rose Guard,"
[13:55] ---
    it can nullify the enemy's
    slashing-type attack just once!
[13:59] ---
    So don't worry, just charge him head on!
[14:01] ---
    Got it!
[14:03] ---
    Blasting...
[14:05] ---
    ...Hammer!!
[14:06] ---
    Now! Yozora!
[14:10] ---
    The wall graphics look
    totally realistic too, don't they?
[14:14] ---
    Yozora!
[14:17] ---
    Sena!
[14:21] ---
    Yozora...
[14:22] ---
    All I did was tell her
    I could nullify its attack.
[14:26] ---
    I never said I'd use it on her behalf.
[14:28] ---
    You told her to charge it head on!
[14:30] ---
    I meant for her to charge and then die.
[14:32] ---
    Hey, you!
[14:35] ---
    What the hell did you do to me?!
[14:36] ---
    You... You...
[14:38] ---
    Huh? H-Hey!
[14:42] ---
    Rose Guard!
[14:47] ---
    That's amazing, Yozora!
[14:49] ---
    But I can't use this
    magic more than a few times!
[14:51] ---
    Yukimura! Rika!
[14:52] ---
    While I've got its attention,
    circle around and attack!
[14:56] ---
    Roger!
[14:56] ---
    Understood.
[15:17] ---
    Rose...
[15:19] ---
    Yozora?
[15:21] ---
    W-What?
[15:26] ---
    Hey! Are you all right?
[15:30] ---
    You... Meat!
[15:32] ---
    Dummy! Dummy!
[15:33] ---
    That's what you get for underestimating me!
[15:37] ---
    Don't tell me...
[15:38] ---
    ...she was tickling Yozora's real body!
[15:48] ---
    My ambition was to die
    on the field of battle...
[15:51] ---
    This game has balance issues...
[15:53] ---
    Yukimura! Rika!
[15:59] ---
    This is the end, huh?
[16:04] ---
    "Believing in Tomorrow"
[16:10] ---
    Bro!
[16:12] ---
    Maria!
[16:14] ---
    You woke up?
[16:16] ---
    Are you okay?
[16:18] ---
    I'm fine! Use your magic to...
[16:20] ---
    How dare you? Bastard!
[16:23] ---
    It was stupid of you to harm my other half!
[16:27] ---
    --Now, taste this true ancestor's
[16:28] ---
    --Hey, healing... magic...
[16:29] ---
    --fury and know the meaning of terror!
[16:33] ---
    I am the great--
[16:37] ---
    You... You're not...
[16:48] ---
    Maria?
[16:52] ---
    K-Kobato?
[16:54] ---
    This girl said she was going to save you.
[17:00] ---
    My other half, I was wondering what you do
[17:03] ---
    that always makes you come home late,
[17:05] ---
    but I didn't expect it
    to be kids' stuff like this.
[17:09] ---
    Who is this girl that
    looks exactly like Iris?
[17:11] ---
    Kodaka, do you know her?
[17:13] ---
    My little sister... Her
    name is Hasegawa Kobato.
[17:18] ---
    There's no way your little
    sister could be this cute!
[17:21] ---
    It's true!
[17:22] ---
    So, Kobato, what'd you
    come here for anyway?
[17:25] ---
    Kindred, recently your
    service to me has been lacking
[17:28] ---
    as you've been amusing
    yourself with these foolish mortals,
[17:32] ---
    so I've come here to supervise you.
[17:35] ---
    In other words, you didn't like it that
[17:37] ---
    Kodaka-sempai was
    putting the club ahead of you,
[17:39] ---
    so you came to check it out, right?
[17:42] ---
    N-Not at all!
[17:43] ---
    What, does this girl have a brother complex?
[17:46] ---
    What should I do? She's as
    cute as Rika-chan in Mofu Mofu!
[17:49] ---
    Would you stop comparing
    everything to video games? It's sick!
[17:52] ---
    True, I am at fault for
    always coming home late.
[17:56] ---
    I know!
[17:57] ---
    How about if I make pork bone
    broth ramen for you every Sunday?
[18:01] ---
    Pork bone broth ramen?! Every Sunday?!
[18:03] ---
    Will you put in a lot of garlic?!
[18:05] ---
    Sure, why not?
[18:06] ---
    Yay!
[18:08] ---
    Well, I can do some
    real cooking on my day off.
[18:12] ---
    And make your lunch, too...
[18:15] ---
    Lunch...
[18:16] ---
    Big Brother!
[18:20] ---
    Big Brother, did you
    defeat the Prince of Darkness?
[18:22] ---
    I'm glad you're safe!
[18:25] ---
    Maria, are you talking in your sleep?
[18:27] ---
    Talking in my sleep...?
[18:29] ---
    Oh, is the game over already?
[18:31] ---
    Sorry, Big Brother!
[18:33] ---
    I wanted to protect you...
[18:37] ---
    Idiot!
[18:38] ---
    Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!
[18:41] ---
    Idiot!!
[18:43] ---
    What do you mean, "idiot"?!
[18:45] ---
    If you say "idiot," you're the idiot!
[18:47] ---
    Shut up, you idiot!
[18:48] ---
    Who the heck are you?!
[18:50] ---
    Kobato. She's my little sister.
[18:53] ---
    This is your little sister, Big Brother?
[18:55] ---
    You said "Big Brother" again!
[18:58] ---
    I... I'm no little sister...
[19:04] ---
    She's not your little sister?
[19:05] ---
    She is.
[19:06] ---
    You seem to be his little sister.
[19:08] ---
    I am a member of the Night Tribe
    and have lived for 10,000 years.
[19:11] ---
    We've been at war with you
    church dogs for many years now...
[19:16] ---
    We're feared by the humans,
    who call us "vampires"...
[19:20] ---
    Vampires! I know you!
[19:23] ---
    You're scary monsters!
[19:24] ---
    What's a vampire doing here?
[19:26] ---
    I'm here to make sure that my
    other half, the blood of my blood,
[19:29] ---
    doesn't get poisoned by
    an agent of the church!
[19:35] ---
    Perhaps it wouldn't be a bad
    idea to enter this club in jest.
[19:38] ---
    You're in the middle school!
[19:40] ---
    There's no rule that prohibits the
    middle school students from joining a club.
[19:45] ---
    Well, since she's your little sister,
    I guess it's not a problem...
[19:48] ---
    I mean, I have no reason to be against it,
[19:52] ---
    as I doubt she has any friends...
[19:55] ---
    My only friend is the darkness of night...
[19:58] ---
    So you don't have any friends, huh?
[20:01] ---
    Why are we letting a vampire in the club?!
[20:03] ---
    I'm against it!
[20:05] ---
    Don't you dare lay a hand on my kindred!
[20:07] ---
    Excuse me?!
[20:08] ---
    Big Brother is an apostle
    of God who makes me lunch!
[20:13] ---
    Die!
[20:14] ---
    I shall judge you in the name of God!
[20:17] ---
    No, it is you who shall shrink
    before my power of darkness!
[20:21] ---
    This is the power of darkness
    that once made a classroom shake!
[20:26] ---
    Hasegawa Cootie Touch!
[20:28] ---
    I-I touch you back!
[20:29] ---
    Cross Barrier!
[20:30] ---
    Too bad for you!
[20:31] ---
    --My Hyper-Barrier is on,
[20:31] ---
    --Cootie...
[20:32] ---
    --so you can't get through.
[20:33] ---
    --...Touch...
[20:34] ---
    --That's not fair!
[20:35] ---
    --It is fair! Church dog!
[20:35] ---
    --Stop that already with the
    "Hasegawa Cootie Touch"...
[20:38] ---
    You poopy! Stupid poopy!
[20:42] ---
    Shall we clean up?
[20:45] ---
    Yeah.
[20:47] ---
    In the end, there was no point to the game...
[20:51] ---
    If you'd protected me then, the
    Prince of Darkness would be toast by now!
[20:55] ---
    You weren't needed there.
[20:57] ---
    What's that?!
[20:59] ---
    The way you howled and
    waved that hammer around...
[21:01] ---
    --...you certainly fit the
    part of a primitive woman!
[21:01] ---
    --With their squabbling,
    they're no different.
[21:03] ---
    --I was a blacksmith! A civilized person!
[21:04] ---
    --I guess we shouldn't
    play games with those two.
[21:06] ---
    --Sorry, I don't understand monkey language!
[21:08] ---
    --Really? Rika had a good time.
[21:09] ---
    --Speak human!
[21:12] ---
    It was the first time Rika played
    a video game with other people,
[21:15] ---
    but it was a lot of fun!
[21:31] ---
    Yozora-sempai, your
    scream earlier was really cute!
[21:35] ---
    Rika may have a crush on you!
[21:37] ---
    D-Don't call me cute!
[21:40] ---
    Rose...
[21:42] ---
    W-Wench!
[21:43] ---
    Meat! I'll get you back for
    that someday, 1,000 times over!
[22:10] ---
    Bro...
[22:12] ---
    My bro isn't really...
[22:36] ---
    Ah, my mind is escaping
    reality as ideally as imaginable

[22:42] ---
    Not that it really matters
    now if I... make friends

[22:46] ---
    Those eyes that belittle me saying,
    "You're a lonesome person on your own," bug me

[22:52] ---
    So, while I was thinking
    that it'd be cool...

[22:55] ---
    ...if only a superficial group gathered up,
[22:58] ---
    They show up, one here,
    one there, and gather together

[23:01] ---
    The unique characters
[23:04] ---
    Throw me off balance
[23:07] ---
    It ticks me off! Especially that mean meat!
[23:09] ---
    My chest is secretly filled with
    apprehension and I feel a bit indecisive

[23:14] ---
    I can't tell you what's in my heart
[23:17] ---
    Am I the one disappointed by that?
[23:20] ---
    Plow through the fog today!
[23:34] ---
    Ever since the day I got left behind,
    my maiden heart has been filled with regret

[23:41] ---
    Hurry and find it--my lost heart
[23:50] ---
    Vampire, take this!
[23:53] ---
    As a true descendant of the
    Night Tribe, I possess far greater power
[23:55] ---
    than the average vampire,
    so that doesn't work on me at all!
[23:58] ---
    That's not fair!
[23:59] ---
    I told you that doesn't work!
    So knock it off, little kid!
[24:03] ---
    I'm not a kid! I'm a full-fledged adult!
[24:06] ---
    And I have a lot of adult knowledge!
[24:08] ---
    Adult knowledge?
[24:09] ---
    Like se--
[24:10] ---
    Next time: "There Aren't Many
    Customers at the Karaoke Box!"
[24:10] ---
    Next time: "There Aren't Many
    Customers at the Karaoke Box!"
[24:13] ---
    When you get under the futon
    covers together with the man you love
[24:15] ---
    and you count the cracks
    in the ceiling, that's se--
[24:17] ---
    Begone, apostle of God!