E2 - Assault! Mr. Fukuma
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] ---
"The War Chronicles of Ronaldo"
This is more interesting than I expected.
[00:06] ---
You were so full of yourself that you gave
me your autobiography when we first met,
[00:09] ---
but this isn't bad reading--
[00:11] ---
Sand...
[00:14] ---
I'll kill you.
[00:15] ---
It really is interesting.
[00:17] ---
Your experience as a hunter has translated
well into an entertaining novel.
[00:22] ---
Shut up. Your flattery is pissing me off.
[00:26] ---
By the way, I bought some Hokkaido
Special Select Milk. You can have it.
[00:30] ---
You're so easy.
[00:31] ---
If a pretty girl tries to sell you
a painting, don't buy it.
[00:36] ---
Who're you calling an easy mark, bastard?
[00:39] ---
Yes, this is Ronaldo--
[00:40] ---
This is Fukuma from Autumn Books.
[00:47] ---
"Autumn Books"
"Mr. Fukuma"
[00:47] ---
"Autumn Books"
"Mr. Fukuma"
Is the manuscript for The War Chronicles
of Ronaldo volume 2 ready yet?
[00:50] ---
Is the manuscript for The War Chronicles
of Ronaldo volume 2 ready yet?
[02:30] ---
Thanks to everyone reading
The Ronaldo Chronicles,
[02:31] ---
"Assault! Mr. Fukuma"
Thanks to everyone reading
The Ronaldo Chronicles,
[02:33] ---
"Assault! Mr. Fukuma"
a second volume is scheduled
to be released.
[02:36] ---
The manuscript for that was due today...
[02:39] ---
"Please don't look for me"
So I'm going to hide for a while.
[02:41] ---
"Please don't look for me"
Did you forget about it?
[02:42] ---
Shut up! I had a lot going on
because of you!
[02:46] ---
My only options now are to flee the
country or hide in a nuclear bomb shelter!
[02:50] ---
Apologize and start writing it
properly right now.
[02:52] ---
You can only say that because you don't
know what Mr. Fukuma's like when he's mad!
[02:57] ---
Is Mr. Fukuma the person
you were talking to earlier?
[03:01] ---
Yeah...
[03:02] ---
"Autumn Books"
"Editor - Fukuma"
Mr. Fukuma is the editor
for The Ronaldo Chronicles.
[03:05] ---
"Autumn Books"
"Editor - Fukuma"
He's still young, but he's capable and
confident. A top editor at Autumn Books.
[03:08] ---
He's still young, but he's capable and
confident. A top editor at Autumn Books.
[03:09] ---
What? He's too good for you.
[03:12] ---
His fighting style is Fist of the
South Star Editorial Battle-Axe.
[03:14] ---
His weapon is a battle-axe,
just like the name says.
[03:17] ---
What?!
[03:18] ---
Why does an editor have mastery
over such a scary fighting style?
[03:22] ---
Having mastery of martial arts and weapons
is a requirement to work for Autumn Books.
[03:26] ---
It's the policy of the whole company?!
[03:29] ---
Soon after I first met Mr. Fukuma,
[03:31] ---
I treated writing The Ronaldo Chronicles
as something I did in my free time...
[03:36] ---
Ronaldo, your progress on
the manuscript seems slow.
[03:40] ---
Oh, sorry! My day job's
been keeping me busy...
[03:43] ---
Is that so?
[03:48] ---
I am so very sorry...
[03:51] ---
You should meet your
deadlines for any job.
[03:56] ---
Ever since then, I decided that
I would never defy him again.
[04:01] ---
If he finds out I haven't
written anything yet,
[04:03] ---
he'll chop off even what's below
my underwear this time, and I'll die!
[04:06] ---
Even if I were to survive,
I'd be a woman starting tomorrow!
[04:08] ---
Oh, Ronalina...
[04:08] ---
"Ronalina"
Oh, Ronalina...
[04:10] ---
Stop with the Ronalina act.
[04:11] ---
I don't want to imagine it.
[04:14] ---
That's how it is, so--
[04:15] ---
"Ahhhh"
[04:17] ---
Sand!
[04:18] ---
--Y-Yes, this is Ronaldo!
--This is Fukuma.
[04:20] ---
How's the manuscript going?
[04:22] ---
Uh, yeah, well--
[04:24] ---
I can't wait to read your manuscript.
[04:28] ---
U-Um, what's that banging
sound in the background?
[04:31] ---
I'm testing the door of the
new iron maiden I bought.
[04:35] ---
He's gonna kill me!
[04:37] ---
I heard you've teamed up with a vampire,
[04:39] ---
so I'm looking forward to
reading about that, too.
[04:42] ---
U-Um, that's, uh--
[04:46] ---
A-Argh, what are you doing, Draluc?!
[04:50] ---
What's the matter, Ronaldo?
[04:52] ---
Draluc... He's attacking me--
[04:57] ---
Don't--
[04:58] ---
Don't worry about me or the manuscript!
[05:01] ---
Are you all right, Ronaldo?
[05:03] ---
I'm fine, but the manuscript--
[05:05] ---
I understand. I'll go over there right now
and chop down that vampire.
[05:10] ---
If I do that, I can have
the manuscript, right?
[05:14] ---
Huh?
[05:19] ---
Idiot! Why did you get me
involved?! Die by yourself!
[05:22] ---
Shut up! I wasn't expecting it
to turn out like this!
[05:25] ---
John, help me! Protect me!
[05:28] ---
Stop that! You're putting
John on the spot!
[05:30] ---
You don't have to sacrifice
yourself for him, John!
[05:33] ---
A-Anyway, once Mr. Fukuma
gets here, it'll be over for us!
[05:37] ---
We must figure out a plan to save us
from this hopeless situation!
[05:40] ---
This is just for temporary peace of mind,
but let's power up the eye-beam thing.
[05:43] ---
Why didn't you bring the dozens
you had with you?!
[05:46] ---
Quiet! You think of something, too!
[05:49] ---
U-Um, uh... um, um...
[05:51] ---
L-Light a bunch of fires around
the agency or something?
[05:54] ---
Trying to scare off animals?
[05:55] ---
Huh? Um, then, uh---
[05:57] ---
Cats! Get a bunch of cats
that are so cute that--
[06:00] ---
Calm down! Take a deep breath!
[06:02] ---
Actually, it'd be faster
if you ran away from here!
[06:04] ---
It doesn't matter where, just hide--
[06:12] ---
Hey.
[06:13] ---
I-Idiot, no. No one could get from Tokyo
to Shin-Yokohama that fast...
[06:34] ---
He's dragging his battle-axe!
[06:37] ---
It's your problem!
[06:39] ---
Hurry up and get out of here
and get chopped up!
[06:41] ---
"Ronaldo Vampire Hunter Agency"
"Everyone welcome"
You should be a decoy!
[06:42] ---
"Ronaldo Vampire Hunter Agency"
"Everyone welcome"
Ronaldo Junior isn't gonna regenerate!
[06:45] ---
Sand!
[06:48] ---
A-A blackout!
[06:50] ---
Oh, no! The eye-beam thing
went into sleep mode!
[06:53] ---
Flashlight! Flashlight!
[06:56] ---
Hey, if you can't see,
then don't keep moving around--
[06:59] ---
Wait! Since I can see in the dark,
I can run away by myself!
[07:04] ---
Farewell, Ronaldo!
I'm abandoning you!
[07:13] ---
If I use a light, then he'll
figure out where I am.
[07:17] ---
Damn it, where's Mr. Fukuma?
[07:19] ---
Ronaldo, over here.
[07:22] ---
What's over there?
[07:25] ---
I got him, Mr. Fukuma!
[07:31] ---
How very kind of you.
[07:35] ---
Now, Ronaldo, can I have your manuscript?
[07:39] ---
M-Mr. Fukuma...!
[07:41] ---
How dare you betray me, Draluc!
[07:45] ---
Vampires are supposed to betray hunters.
[07:47] ---
Besides...
[07:49] ---
Mr. Fukuma said they had extra games
in the editorial department I could have,
[07:52] ---
so I couldn't help myself.
[07:53] ---
A vampire shouldn't be lured by things!
[07:56] ---
And anyway, there's no way
you could hold me down!
[08:01] ---
Oh, yeah, I forgot!
[08:04] ---
Sorry, Mr. Fukuma! I can't die yet!
[08:07] ---
Please wait another two weeks
for the manuscript!
[08:14] ---
Hey, wai--
[08:28] ---
"Groan..."
[08:32] ---
Now, you can work there
until you finish writing it.
[08:36] ---
Oh, so that's how you use this.
[08:43] ---
"Falling Like Flowers in Shin-Yokohama"
[08:47] ---
The cell culture experiment was a success.
[08:50] ---
All that's left is to see
how effective this is...
[08:52] ---
"Vampire Research Center"
"Director - Yomotsuzaka"
All that's left is to see
how effective this is...
[09:10] ---
Hey, Ronaldo. About my pay--
[09:13] ---
Huh?
[09:14] ---
Do I get it the following month?
Is it a fixed salary with commission?
[09:17] ---
What?!
[09:18] ---
How much do I get this
month? About 500,000?
[09:21] ---
What?!
[09:23] ---
What you're saying is so crazy
I don't know where to even start!
[09:26] ---
There's no way you're
getting a single yen! Idiot!
[09:32] ---
Sand...
[09:34] ---
Stop messing around!
[09:35] ---
What are you gonna do to my plan
to rebuild Castle Draluc?!
[09:35] ---
"2 Trillion Yen Savings Box"
What are you gonna do to my plan
to rebuild Castle Draluc?!
[09:38] ---
"2 Trillion Yen Savings Box"
Even if you make 500,000 yen a month,
it'll take 330,000 years to fill that!
[09:42] ---
"2 Trillion Yen Savings Box"
Do you realize that?!
[09:43] ---
Before talking about salary or whatever,
[09:45] ---
maybe you should do some
work, damn small fry!
[09:47] ---
Va...! Vampire!
[09:49] ---
What now?
[09:51] ---
Hello, this is Ronaldo.
[09:53] ---
Ronaldo, are you free?
[09:56] ---
A vampire just appeared.
Come give me a hand.
[10:02] ---
Thanks, Ronaldo.
Everyone's busy tonight.
[10:05] ---
What kind of vampire is it?
[10:07] ---
"Vampire Hunter"
"'Left Hand of Iron' Satetsu"
[10:07] ---
"Vampire Hunter"
"'Left Hand of Iron' Satetsu"
A vampire captured by the Vampire
Research Center ran away.
[10:12] ---
Apparently, it's a vampire
that can control plants.
[10:16] ---
We should hurry up and hunt it down.
[10:19] ---
Don't get in the way by mistake, Dralu--!
[10:24] ---
The guy that was with you
put that up earlier and went away...
[10:27] ---
Tell me if he does that!
[10:29] ---
I-I didn't know if it was
something I should tell you...
[10:36] ---
You don't take me seriously. That's why I
was able to steal a march on you, Ronaldo.
[10:40] ---
I, Draluc, will hunt down the inferior
vampires around there before you do.
[10:44] ---
When I do...
[10:46] ---
I underestimated you!
[10:48] ---
Yes.
[10:49] ---
Sorry, Ronaldo.
I'll be an overnight hero!
[10:53] ---
It's not just the compensation.
[10:54] ---
Making the whole agency mine
isn't too much to dream of.
[10:57] ---
When that happens-- What the--?
[10:59] ---
Grade Schooler Tackle!
[11:01] ---
Sand...
[11:03] ---
All right! I defeated the bad vampire!
[11:06] ---
Good job, Shin!
[11:08] ---
Like taking candy from a baby.
[11:10] ---
Yeah!
[11:11] ---
Who are you people?!
[11:14] ---
We are...
[11:16] ---
...the Shin-Yokohama Boy Hunters!
[11:19] ---
We heard that a bad vampire appeared.
[11:22] ---
So we came to defeat him!
[11:24] ---
And so--
[11:25] ---
Grade Schooler Stomping!
[11:28] ---
Stop that!
[11:29] ---
You've got the wrong vampire!
I'm not a bad vampire.
[11:33] ---
I'm actually a super cool
vampire who helps hunters!
[11:41] ---
What is it?
[11:42] ---
Shh! Be quiet.
[11:43] ---
Your playing around
lured out the real one.
[11:47] ---
This isn't a small fry. It's a superior
vampire--a vampire lord.
[11:53] ---
He smells like a compatriot.
[11:57] ---
My compatriot, who bares his fangs
at humans! Come, show yourself!
[12:15] ---
My foolish compatriot,
who works with humans...
[12:24] ---
"Vampire - Nudenium"
I am the vampire, Nudenium.
[12:29] ---
I will bury this town in flowers.
If you get in my way...
[12:33] ---
...I will not go easy on you!
[12:37] ---
That? That smells like your compatriot?!
[12:40] ---
I take it back! I take it back!
[12:43] ---
Damn it, don't get scared!
Guys, Formation Delta!
[12:47] ---
They're running away!
[12:48] ---
You're not as popular as I thought!
[12:49] ---
Shut up!
[12:51] ---
Oh? Will you hold your ground?
Interesting. I like you, compatriot.
[12:56] ---
And you, boy!
[12:57] ---
Don't like me! Don't like me!
[12:59] ---
I'm sorry for trying to sound fancy,
but will you stop calling me "compatriot"?
[13:04] ---
First, I'll "plant" you two!
[13:20] ---
Now, swallow this seed.
[13:22] ---
No way!
[13:24] ---
If you swallow it,
you will become of my blood,
[13:27] ---
and you will be able to inherit my power.
[13:29] ---
No way!
[13:31] ---
I can't take it anymore!
[13:32] ---
I don't want to get more involved
with this guy than I already am!
[13:35] ---
Even if you lose your
nerve now, it's too late!
[13:39] ---
Special Move: Swift Blossom Running!
[13:45] ---
He got around us! He's really fast
and hard to deal with!
[13:49] ---
If it's come to this, we have
no choice but to fight, Damn Kid!
[13:52] ---
How are we supposed to fight that,
Damn Weak Old Man?
[13:54] ---
Quiet!
[13:56] ---
Draw him close for an instant!
I'll surprise him and bite him!
[14:02] ---
Listen, with vampires,
[14:04] ---
whoever has stronger blood
can control the other.
[14:08] ---
If my blood is superior,
then I can control that guy.
[14:11] ---
What if you can't?
[14:13] ---
Yo-ho!
[14:15] ---
We'll be made to swallow that
seed and end up like this.
[14:17] ---
I'd rather die!
[14:20] ---
He's here! Draw him to you somehow!
[14:23] ---
Take this! Grade Schooler Sand Attack!
[14:26] ---
Impudent child.
[14:28] ---
I won't fall for that!
[14:34] ---
What?!
[14:46] ---
Damn Weak Old Man...?
[14:57] ---
You almost got me.
[15:00] ---
Now, become of my bloo--
[15:17] ---
Damn it.
[15:19] ---
I caught something gross.
[15:23] ---
R-Ronaldo, well done!
[15:26] ---
What do you mean, "well done"?
Going off on your own like that!
[15:31] ---
Oh, but I worked pretty hard
this time, don't you think?
[15:38] ---
Well, I guess it wasn't bad for you.
[15:41] ---
That's right! Now, pay me for my work!
I think about 1,000,000 yen should do it.
[15:46] ---
Okay, fine. I'll give you payment in kind!
[15:48] ---
No thanks.
[15:52] ---
I didn't think it'd work so well.
[15:55] ---
It's just a nutritional supplement.
[16:00] ---
Here we go.
[16:03] ---
Oh, my, it's gone completely wild.
[16:12] ---
"Can a Bang on the Wall Kill Him?"
[16:15] ---
"Can a Bang on the Wall Kill Him?"
What the hell? Why is the lid
of your coffin on the floor?!
[16:16] ---
What the hell? Why is the lid
of your coffin on the floor?!
[16:18] ---
Ouch! Look, there's blood!
[16:20] ---
Your blood? That doesn't
sound very appetizing.
[16:24] ---
I'll kill you!
[16:25] ---
Don't be angry.
[16:26] ---
For a vampire, what's most delicious
is the lifeblood of a young virgin.
[16:31] ---
I'm mad about the lid!
[16:33] ---
I have only been drinking milk recently.
[16:36] ---
It's about time I have some
blood that's full of life.
[16:38] ---
Oh, I want to take a bite out
of a girl with a pretty nape.
[16:42] ---
If you say that outside, you'll be
arrested before getting hunted down.
[16:46] ---
Excuse me!
[16:48] ---
Yes, coming!
[16:51] ---
Hello there.
[16:53] ---
Is this the residence of a Mr. Ronaldo?
[16:56] ---
Is this voluntary? Should I call a lawyer?
[16:59] ---
Did you do something
you should be arrested for?
[17:03] ---
Unfortunately, we did not
come here today to arrest you.
[17:07] ---
I'm Hinaichi from the Kanagawa Prefectural
Police Vampire Control Division.
[17:11] ---
"Vice-Captain - Hinaichi"
[17:11] ---
"Vice-Captain - Hinaichi"
Hunter Ronaldo, I have come
to investigate your vampire.
[17:17] ---
The Vampire Control Division...
[17:20] ---
We'll leave you to it, then.
[17:22] ---
Thanks for bringing me here.
[17:24] ---
Well? What are you
planning to investigate?
[17:27] ---
"Vampire Danger Levels"
"Earthworm - Leave it alone"
Well? What are you
planning to investigate?
[17:29] ---
"Vampire Danger Levels"
"Earthworm - Leave it alone"
You'll just see that the idiot is at
the same level as an earthworm.
[17:31] ---
"Vampire Danger Levels"
"Earthworm - Leave it alone"
It's just to be safe.
[17:33] ---
For example,
[17:34] ---
has he said anything dangerous that would
indicate a desire to harm humans?
[17:38] ---
You guys sure are sticklers for the rules.
[17:40] ---
Nothing like that would even
cross that idiot's mi--
[17:43] ---
He's said it before!
[17:44] ---
Oh, I want to take a bite out
of a girl with a pretty nape.
[17:47] ---
He was totally saying something that
would cause a human harm earlier!
[17:50] ---
"Suspension of Business"
This is bad! If she hears that, it could
drag me down and ruin my life, too!
[17:54] ---
Damn it, why did Vamp Control
have to send a girl?
[17:58] ---
And she's pretty cute, too!
What are they playing at?
[18:00] ---
"That Idiot"
And she's pretty cute, too!
What are they playing at?
[18:00] ---
"That Idiot"
If he sees her, that idiot will
100% let something slip.
[18:04] ---
I can't let them meet.
[18:06] ---
I can feel the bad end coming
if he gets even one glimpse of her.
[18:10] ---
What should I do?
[18:11] ---
I have to do something before
they meet... Something...!
[18:17] ---
I'll kill him! I'll kill that idiot
before they meet!
[18:20] ---
To do that, I have to keep the girl
here somehow... and kill that guy!
[18:27] ---
What's the matter? Hurry up
and let me see that vampir--
[18:30] ---
Whoops, I slipped!
[18:33] ---
Secret Technique: Hunter Wall Slam!
[18:36] ---
Wh-What are you doing out of the blue?
What are you trying to do?
[18:40] ---
Draluc should've died with the
vibrations that went through the wall.
[18:43] ---
Hey, are you listening?
[18:45] ---
How was it?
[18:51] ---
--I failed!
[18:52] ---
--At what?!
--I failed!
[18:53] ---
What do you mean, you failed?
[18:55] ---
Don't tell me you're hiding
something about that vampire!
[19:00] ---
If that's the case--
[19:01] ---
Secret Technique: Hunter 16-Beat Stomp!
[19:04] ---
What are you doing?!
[19:06] ---
Well... There was a bug crawling around,
so I was trying to trample it.
[19:09] ---
Why do you keep looking like
you've accomplished something?
[19:12] ---
It was an ultimate move to kill him
with the vibrations in the floor, but...
[19:17] ---
Maybe vibrations aren't good enough?!
[19:20] ---
In the first place, it's hard
to tell if he's died or not.
[19:24] ---
John!
[19:27] ---
What, is that your armadillo?
[19:30] ---
Um, well...
[19:32] ---
I was worried for a second.
But it's a good chance--
[19:35] ---
There, there, John...
[19:37] ---
I need a favor. Give Lord Dral
a little punch and kill him for me.
[19:43] ---
S-Sorry! I was kidding! I-I'm sorry!
S-Sorry about that, John.
[19:47] ---
Will you just make a little ball for me?
That's all you need to do.
[19:52] ---
And then, with this garlic...
[19:56] ---
Secret Technique: Hunter Throw-In!
[19:58] ---
'Madillo!
[19:59] ---
If John unrolls in the other room, then...
[20:03] ---
...Draluc will die from
the smell of garlic!
[20:05] ---
Sorry, John! I'm really sorry!
Do your best!
[20:14] ---
John!
[20:16] ---
John...!
[20:18] ---
What's all the racket about?
[20:22] ---
Stop messing around!
What are you trying to...?
[20:32] ---
--Dral--
--Oh, what a beautiful lady.
[20:33] ---
--Oh, what a beautiful lady.
[20:36] ---
I apologize for Ronaldo's rudeness.
[20:44] ---
I am honored to make your acquaintance.
Did you have business with me?
[20:51] ---
Huh?
[20:53] ---
Wh-Wh-Wh-Wh-What is this vampire doing?!
[20:57] ---
F-Fine! That hunter wasted my time
today with his strange behavior!
[21:01] ---
I will return another day!
Wait for what's coming to you!
[21:07] ---
You... What was that earlier
that set my teeth on edge?
[21:10] ---
What are you talking about?
I was just being polite to a lady.
[21:15] ---
My, her blood seemed
delicious--she was cute.
[21:19] ---
Maybe if we become friends,
she'll let me have a sip.
[21:22] ---
I look forward to her return!
[21:24] ---
You are thinking dangerous thoughts!
[21:27] ---
What dangerous thoughts? I--
[21:30] ---
Hm?
[21:33] ---
It stinks!
[21:34] ---
Sand!
[21:38] ---
S-Sorry. Really, I'm so sorry, John.
[21:45] ---
I said I'm sorry...
[21:51] ---
Those of my blood believe
[21:53] ---
the human society convenient and
useful to us should be preserved.
[21:57] ---
In other words,
it seems fun, so we'll help.
[21:58] ---
"Protectors of humans
who fight in the night"
In other words,
it seems fun, so we'll help.
[22:01] ---
That's how it is.
[22:03] ---
I'll risk my life to beat you,
damn bastard!
[22:07] ---
The vampire dies in no time.
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