E9 - Citizen Baseball Kane
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] ---
What would you like?
[00:05] ---
Hot milk. Put it on Ronaldo's tab.
[00:08] ---
Don't order without asking, moron!
[00:10] ---
Oh, a cocoa for John.
[00:14] ---
Sorry for bringing that idiot here.
[00:17] ---
It's fine. I have fun talking about
cooking with Draluc.
[00:22] ---
There's nothing wrong
with bringing him here.
[00:24] ---
Draluc's a good guy to talk to.
[00:26] ---
"Hunter [Extra-Toppings
Chinese Food Girl] - Ta Chan"
"Hunter - Maria"
Yeah, this guy's interesting.
[00:28] ---
"Hunter [Extra-Toppings
Chinese Food Girl] - Ta Chan"
"Hunter - Maria"
You've got a small anus, Ronaldo.
[00:30] ---
Huh?!
[00:37] ---
I'm against violence!
[00:38] ---
A vampire!
[00:41] ---
Someone call a hunter!
[02:16] ---
"Citizen Baseball Kane"
[02:17] ---
"Citizen Baseball Kane"
They're bold to come out
right in front of the guild.
[02:20] ---
"Citizen Baseball Kane"
What kind of vampire?
[02:23] ---
"Baseball Strip Rock-Paper-Scissors"
"Yakyuken"
[02:23] ---
"Baseball Strip Rock-Paper-Scissors"
"Yakyuken"
"Vampire - Yakyuken Lover"
I am the vampire, Yakyuken Lover.
[02:27] ---
"Baseball Strip Rock-Paper-Scissors"
"Yakyuken"
Someone weird came out!
[02:29] ---
Yakyuken is a cultural tradition of
this planet that should be protected.
[02:33] ---
It's a game with broad appeal
that anyone can play.
[02:36] ---
Undressing can increase intimacy
in interpersonal relationship!
[02:40] ---
I will pass this game of strip rock-paper-
scissors on to the next generation!
[02:49] ---
Are all vampires like this?
[02:51] ---
When you live for too long,
sometimes your brains turn to punch.
[02:55] ---
Now, let's go!
[02:56] ---
What?!
[02:57] ---
Out! Safe!
[02:59] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[03:01] ---
Don't be drawn in, Satetsu!
[03:04] ---
Does my hairband count
as a piece of clothing?
[03:06] ---
There's a limit to how much of
a pushover you can be, idiot!
[03:08] ---
Th-That's not it...
When I hear that song--
[03:11] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[03:13] ---
My body just starts playing
yakyuken on its own...
[03:15] ---
Your body's playing yakyuken on its own?!
[03:17] ---
Does he use hypnosis or something?
[03:19] ---
Bastard....
[03:21] ---
How dare you make Satetsu half-naked!
[03:28] ---
My Yakyuken Barrier will not allow
any boorish person to pass.
[03:32] ---
While I'm playing yakyuken,
no one can get in my way!
[03:37] ---
Wh-What?!
[03:39] ---
He's using hypnosis and holding
a barrier at the same time!
[03:41] ---
That takes a lot of skill!
[03:43] ---
He could have put that
skill to a different use!
[03:45] ---
While we were talking,
Satetsu's been cleaned out!
[03:48] ---
You're too weak at rock-paper-scissors.
[03:51] ---
Even if you lost, you are a comrade
who played yakyuken with me.
[03:54] ---
"Yakyuken Lover"
[03:55] ---
"Yakyuken Lover"
You should wear this T-shirt.
[03:56] ---
"Yakyuken Lover"
No way...!
[04:01] ---
Okay, second match!
[04:03] ---
Huh? Me?!
[04:04] ---
Out! Safe!
[04:05] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[04:07] ---
Tie! One more time!
[04:09] ---
The barrier opens for an instant
to pull in the next player.
[04:12] ---
If we strike then...
[04:14] ---
It's impossible. There's not enough time.
[04:17] ---
A serious conversation with yakyuken
in the background is kind of surreal.
[04:20] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[04:21] ---
Damn it! Someone stop this...!
[04:24] ---
This is great, kid! Strip, strip!
[04:26] ---
You've got a nice body!
[04:28] ---
We've got spectators!
[04:30] ---
Get your popcorn and drinks here.
[04:32] ---
Master!
[04:34] ---
The hunters are all male...
[04:36] ---
That's borin-- I mean, gender inequality!
[04:40] ---
The young lady over there!
Learn about how wonderful yakyuken is!
[04:44] ---
Out! Safe!
[04:45] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[04:47] ---
What?!
[04:49] ---
Like I'd let a woman do this.
Even a zhajiang horse like you...
[04:54] ---
Ta Chan went home.
[04:56] ---
She said she wasn't going
to stick around anymore.
[05:00] ---
What's with the "protect culture" crap?
You're obviously doing this for the girls!
[05:03] ---
For the girls? What an insult.
I do not have any wicked feelings!
[05:09] ---
Both men and women should bear
responsibility for culture together.
[05:12] ---
That's the true beauty of yakyuken!
[05:14] ---
Liar!
[05:15] ---
Why are you acting so high and mighty
saying something so serious?!
[05:18] ---
Yakyuken isn't actually a stripping game!
[05:21] ---
Shut up, idiot!
[05:22] ---
You bastard!
[05:24] ---
I can't let this sleazebag
do whatever he wants!
[05:27] ---
Oh, right.
[05:28] ---
Wouldn't someone with no shame about
stripping be the guy's natural enemy?
[05:32] ---
So that's why I asked you
to come here, Nudenium!
[05:36] ---
You can do it!
[05:37] ---
Go!
[05:40] ---
Foolish compatriot, I do not flinch at
the thought of removing my clothes.
[05:46] ---
For people like that, I have them put
on clothes instead when they lose.
[05:49] ---
No...!
[05:51] ---
I have been soiled...
[05:53] ---
You're useless!
[05:55] ---
In that case, someone will have to be bait
and make an opening in that barrier!
[05:59] ---
Will you rush in baring all, then?
[06:02] ---
Here, it's a Draluc Shield!
[06:04] ---
No...! You brute!
[06:08] ---
♪ Yoyoino-- ♪
[06:08] ---
John Guard!
[06:14] ---
You don't have any clothes,
so I'll scrape some off instead.
[06:16] ---
John...!
[06:20] ---
Bastard, how dare you do that to my John!
[06:22] ---
Fight me, you scumbag!
[06:24] ---
Very well. Someone like you
is just a yoyoinoyoi.
[06:29] ---
Don't worry, John. I have a plan.
[06:32] ---
With this amazing hand,
any opponent will lose in a heartbeat!
[06:32] ---
"Rock"
With this amazing hand,
any opponent will lose in a heartbeat!
[06:33] ---
"Rock" "Scissors"
With this amazing hand,
any opponent will lose in a heartbeat!
[06:34] ---
"Rock" "Scissors" "Paper"
With this amazing hand,
any opponent will lose in a heartbeat!
[06:35] ---
Cheaters are removed from the field!
[06:38] ---
No! Sand...
[06:41] ---
Oh, that was a good show.
[06:42] ---
That washed out my soul.
[06:46] ---
Damn it.
[06:47] ---
How is he so strong
at rock-paper-scissors?
[06:49] ---
He's also wearing a ton of clothes!
[06:52] ---
--Stop messing around!
--That's dirty!
[06:54] ---
Looks hot.
[06:56] ---
All the men in the way
are wearing T-shirts.
[06:59] ---
Now, all that's left is--
[07:01] ---
The one with the big boobs!
[07:03] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[07:08] ---
You thought you won already, didn't you?
[07:10] ---
Don't worry, everyone!
I'll take this match.
[07:14] ---
If I take this off first,
there's nothing to fear later!
[07:19] ---
Maria!
[07:21] ---
Sand...!
[07:22] ---
Whoo-hoo! All right!
[07:26] ---
This sleazebag isn't even trying
to hide his thoughts anymore!
[07:29] ---
You're a brave woman.
But that's a foolish plan.
[07:32] ---
Because with the thought that
"there's nothing under there,"
[07:36] ---
it increases the sexiness of
tearing off "the last piece"
[07:40] ---
and just emphasizes it!
[07:42] ---
Wh-What...?!
[07:44] ---
♪ Yoyoinoyoi! Yoyoinoyoi! ♪
[07:48] ---
What's the matter?!
You're losing more and more clothes!
[07:52] ---
Maria!
[07:53] ---
You sleazeball!
[07:54] ---
Open up!
[07:56] ---
It's no use. The Yakyuken
Barrier is invincible!
[07:59] ---
It won't allow any meddling
from the outside.
[08:02] ---
Damn it...
[08:03] ---
No way... No way...!
[08:06] ---
In that case, the person inside
just has to beat him up, right?
[08:28] ---
Everyone, good work.
[08:30] ---
"Ba-dump! All-Male Yakyuken Tournament"
This was really popular with the middle-
aged girls, so the guild will sponsor--
[08:35] ---
"Ba-dump! All-Male Yakyuken Tournament"
Please don't!
[08:41] ---
"The Left Hand of Iron Is Kind of Boring"
[09:02] ---
A gun's not going to work.
[09:03] ---
What?!
[09:04] ---
I am the vampire, Passionate Kiss.
[09:07] ---
"Vampire - Passionate Kiss"
[09:08] ---
"Vampire - Passionate Kiss"
It's another weird one!
[09:10] ---
I kiss handsome men and then
suck their blood. It's what I love.
[09:14] ---
I have type AB blood. I'm a Virgo.
I like men that look like Masaki Okada.
[09:18] ---
I don't care, moron!
[09:20] ---
If you want to defeat me,
you must evade my rain of kisses!
[09:28] ---
It must be nice, Ronaldo.
[09:30] ---
You're popular and well-known.
[09:34] ---
I'm completely hopeless.
[09:37] ---
I'm always standing nervously
in the background.
[09:40] ---
I'm jealous of the mentality you have
to even write an autobiography...
[09:44] ---
Don't insult me while you're
inflicting damage on yourself.
[09:46] ---
Recently, you're even doing amazing
things like teaming up with a vampire!
[09:50] ---
I'm so jealous...
[09:52] ---
Fine, I'll let you have some.
[09:56] ---
Huh?
[09:58] ---
Hello, hello.
[10:00] ---
Thanks for requesting me for tonight.
I'm your 1-Day-Rental Draluc!
[10:04] ---
I heard that you wanted to do something
about how boring you are.
[10:08] ---
I, Draluc, will make you into
a whole new arm guy!
[10:14] ---
You can't go wrong with someone
full of personality like me!
[10:18] ---
Come!
[10:21] ---
O-Okay, then...
[10:23] ---
Such a pushover!
[10:25] ---
Now, to increase popularity
and make a better impression,
[10:28] ---
we'll start from your appearance.
[10:30] ---
What do you think? How about
trying Miss Senya's extreme style?
[10:35] ---
Oh... I don't really like
stuff like that... Sorry.
[10:38] ---
Even your response is boring.
[10:40] ---
Oh, if I'm going to change my
appearance, then maybe this arm?
[10:44] ---
I have different types
with different uses.
[10:45] ---
No, that's not something a
normal person could tell apart.
[10:48] ---
It's basically one type.
[10:50] ---
One type...
[10:52] ---
Sorry. Please do something other
than change my appearance.
[10:55] ---
Then, what about working on your PR?
[10:58] ---
I know a journalist hungry for leads.
[11:00] ---
Yeah! I'm Kameya from
Vampire Hunter Weekly!
[11:04] ---
I'll write an article that'll
knock off your butt hairs!
[11:07] ---
That's scary!
[11:10] ---
What jobs have you had recently?
[11:12] ---
Um...
[11:14] ---
I helped direct the spraying of
chemicals to ward off vampires
[11:18] ---
and removed a nest of inferior vampires...
[11:20] ---
And I went to a retirement home
to talk about fighting vampires...
[11:24] ---
Wow, it's like a record of
what they do at city hall.
[11:27] ---
Satetsu is kind, so he always takes
[11:30] ---
the behind-the-scenes jobs no one
wants because they aren't flashy.
[11:33] ---
Master...
[11:34] ---
I can give them all to him,
so it's super convenient.
[11:36] ---
Master?!
[11:37] ---
Now, now, if you take some
flashy jobs from now on,
[11:40] ---
--lots more people will know who you are!
[11:42] ---
--Yes, this is the Hunters Guild.
--lots more people will know who you are!
[11:45] ---
A vampire has appeared.
[11:46] ---
Satetsu, will you take
the job to exterminate it?
[11:49] ---
Oh, yes!
[11:51] ---
Now, this is a windfall!
[11:52] ---
A jack of all trades will definitely
be able to show off here!
[11:57] ---
That's a lot of pressure...
[12:07] ---
"Inferior Vampires - Ghouls"
[12:12] ---
Wait, vampire!
[12:16] ---
It's a ghoul user?!
[12:19] ---
What are you trying to do
with all those underlings?
[12:22] ---
A hunter?
Isn't it obvious what I'm doing?
[12:26] ---
I'm breaching etiquette!
[12:28] ---
Etiquette...? Huh?
[12:31] ---
You don't get it?
[12:32] ---
Littering, walking in flower beds,
and pulling up parts of a lawn.
[12:33] ---
"Don't go into the flower bed!"
Littering, walking in flower beds,
and pulling up parts of a lawn.
[12:35] ---
Littering, walking in flower beds,
and pulling up parts of a lawn.
[12:37] ---
I do things like that.
[12:39] ---
Like that?
[12:40] ---
"Vampire - Etiquette Breacher"
I am the vampire, Etiquette Breacher!
[12:44] ---
There's no reason for a vampire
to follow humans' silly rules!
[12:48] ---
So, I'll break them all!
[12:52] ---
Go, my ghouls!
[12:55] ---
This guy's pretty weak.
[12:58] ---
Monopolize the playground equipment!
[13:01] ---
While you do that,
I'll fill the sandbox with water!
[13:03] ---
Oh, a flood!
[13:05] ---
Such boring crimes.
Doesn't it feel futile?
[13:08] ---
The client was an eyewitness who said
he was a bad influence on the kids
[13:11] ---
and asked for him to be taken elsewhere.
[13:13] ---
Nothing to be nervous about here, huh?
[13:15] ---
The arm guy might've been born
to take on boring, weak guys.
[13:21] ---
I'll leave an opened can
of juice on a bench!
[13:24] ---
Right where it'd spill if you
hit it with your elbow!
[13:27] ---
I wonder why that guy looks
like he's having so much fun.
[13:31] ---
Stop! Um... You're causing
trouble for other people.
[13:36] ---
Quiet! Vampire Pantsing!
[13:42] ---
How sloppy...
[13:44] ---
But you have succeeded
in standing out, in a way.
[13:47] ---
Arm guy, you've graduated
to Mr. Elephant Boxers.
[13:50] ---
My name...
[13:52] ---
I'm not afraid of you hunters!
[13:54] ---
Why does this guy look so triumphant
just for pantsing someone?
[13:57] ---
And now, for the finishing
etiquette breach!
[13:59] ---
Click your tongue when you run into him!
[14:02] ---
Ow!
[14:04] ---
Sorry...
[14:05] ---
Mr. Elephant Boxers, hang in there!
[14:07] ---
A hunter can't do anything
against my ghouls!
[14:10] ---
Nothing can stop me now!
[14:13] ---
Look! I'm stealing toilet paper!
[14:17] ---
That's not breaching etiquette,
that's steali-- Sand...
[14:21] ---
Shut up! Vampire Gravel Throwing!
[14:24] ---
Oh, I-I'm getting mixed up!
[14:27] ---
That's enough. Stop that!
[14:30] ---
Shut up! Go play with
the ghouls over there!
[14:36] ---
Damn, you're loud, too!
Get out of the way!
[14:41] ---
Bastard! That's my John--
[14:44] ---
I told you to stop that...
[14:47] ---
...you idiot!
[14:51] ---
Huh?
[14:55] ---
How dare you hit a child in front of me!
[14:59] ---
Just you try that again.
[15:02] ---
This fist will split that dumb
head of yours in half!
[15:10] ---
Um... Mr. Satetsu...?
[15:13] ---
Wh-What a feat...
[15:15] ---
Man, you scared m--
[15:17] ---
Please keep this a secret!
[15:17] ---
What?!
[15:19] ---
Oh, I did it again!
I acted like a delinquent again!
[15:24] ---
After I'd decided to turn
over a new leaf, too...
[15:28] ---
Um... I'm sorry, I have to do this.
[15:32] ---
Will you come with me?
[15:34] ---
Huh? Oh... yes...
[15:40] ---
Yeah, this guy was crazy before.
[15:43] ---
He's reformed and a hunter now,
but back in the day, he was really--
[15:46] ---
You promised to keep quiet about it!
[15:51] ---
"Vamp Weekly"
[15:51] ---
"Vamp Weekly"
Hey! I wrote an article about
what happened the other day!
[15:55] ---
I took out the delinquent
punch when I wrote it.
[15:58] ---
Oh, thank you.
[16:00] ---
Oh, that's nice.
Now, you'll be more popu--
[16:03] ---
"Elephant Boxers"
"Up Close with Hunter Satetsu"
[16:08] ---
This is what it means to be famous...
[16:14] ---
Congrats.
[16:16] ---
"Night Beach"
[16:17] ---
"Night Beach"
"Emperor of the Shore"
[16:18] ---
"Night Beach"
"Emperor of the Shore"
Is this it? The beach resort
with the report
[16:21] ---
"Night Beach"
"Emperor of the Shore"
where the owner of the beachside
clubhouse called saying,
[16:22] ---
"Something weird's here," and then
hasn't been able to be contacted since?
[16:26] ---
I hope there's not too much damage...
[16:29] ---
What kind of vampire?
I'm itching to fight them!
[16:32] ---
Let's focus and deal with this!
[16:34] ---
Let's look for shells and play, John.
[16:41] ---
Beach volleyball at night, huh?
[16:44] ---
Well, it doesn't look like there's
anything strange, though.
[16:46] ---
Maybe we got the place wrong...?
[16:51] ---
What?!
[16:53] ---
You all are wearing a lot of clothes!
[16:55] ---
Wear a micro bikini...!
[16:57] ---
Your body and mind will be
exhilarated like it's a holiday!
[16:59] ---
They've been hypnotized by a vampire!
[17:02] ---
Damn it, should we retreat for now?
[17:04] ---
I've been surrounded, wahh!
[17:05] ---
Idiot, why?!
[17:07] ---
Draluc, look out!
[17:08] ---
Arm guy!
[17:10] ---
Bikini!
[17:18] ---
M-Micro bikinis are nice...
[17:20] ---
Arm guy...!
[17:23] ---
Hunters are a trifle, too.
[17:25] ---
Who's there?!
[17:28] ---
"Vampire - Micro Bikini"
I am the vampire, Micro Bikini.
[17:30] ---
"Vampire - Micro Bikini"
I am the one who will rule
over all you humans.
[17:33] ---
Another weird one came out, damn it!
[17:36] ---
As you can see, the micro
bikinis are infectious.
[17:39] ---
My Micro Waves will soon cover the world!
[17:43] ---
I feel like "microwaves"
are something different!
[17:45] ---
Foolish hunters, you all should also
become members of this new world.
[17:50] ---
Wait, bastard!
[17:52] ---
Bikini... Bikini... Bikini...
Bikini... Bikini...
[18:00] ---
Hurry, Shot!
[18:01] ---
Put on a micro bikini!
[18:05] ---
Damn it, we've been
surrounded by micro bikinis.
[18:08] ---
We can't beat up civilians just
because they were brainwashed.
[18:12] ---
I'll be the bait.
Use that chance to run away.
[18:17] ---
Wh-What are you saying,
Shot? By yourself--
[18:19] ---
It's fine. Look.
[18:22] ---
Shot!
[18:24] ---
I carelessly got bitten.
It's pathetic...
[18:28] ---
I-I-It really is pathetic!
[18:32] ---
Hurry up and go! While I'm still myself!
[18:35] ---
Damn it! Shot, we'll get revenge for you!
[18:40] ---
Hey, aren't there more
bikinis on this side?
[18:43] ---
They look kind of like they're
having fun, and it's pissing me off!
[18:46] ---
Calm down!
[18:48] ---
If there are more bikinis here,
[18:50] ---
it means there's something here
that needs to be protected!
[18:53] ---
The boss is on the other side!
[18:54] ---
Even if you say that...
[18:56] ---
...how are we supposed
to get through them?
[18:58] ---
I have a plan.
Get their attention for a second.
[19:02] ---
Over here, sexy bathing suits!
[19:05] ---
In that opening, I'll run away!
[19:06] ---
Scumbag!
[19:08] ---
That guy's wearing more clothes!
[19:09] ---
I'm against clothes!
[19:12] ---
Sand!
[19:14] ---
Hey, this guy turned into sand.
[19:16] ---
Let's make him into a castle.
[19:17] ---
Wahh...!
[19:19] ---
Let's go while we can!
[19:21] ---
We'll be right back to save you, John!
[19:23] ---
Where's that damn pervert?!
[19:26] ---
Look! It's the beachside clubhouse!
[19:28] ---
Looks fishy!
[19:30] ---
"Beachside Clubhouse"
[19:37] ---
We've got you cornered, bikini bastard!
[19:39] ---
Oh? Good job getting this far.
But I won't be the one fighting you.
[19:47] ---
Shot! Satetsu!
[19:49] ---
Ronaldo, micro bikinis are nice...
[19:52] ---
Wake up, idiot!
[19:54] ---
If I wear this, I'm sure no one
will call me boring anymore...
[19:57] ---
I'll help you with that!
[19:59] ---
Now, you two will also
wear bikinis...! And then...
[20:03] ---
It looks bad on you!
[20:04] ---
Oh, Shot...
[20:11] ---
What am I doing...?
[20:12] ---
I see! If we take them off,
they'll come back to their senses!
[20:14] ---
What, is that guy a moron? It's so easy!
[20:17] ---
If we know that, then it'll be fast!
Hurry up and take them off!
[20:20] ---
No...!
[20:22] ---
The tables have turned.
There's no bikini to protect you now!
[20:27] ---
No more bikinis? Fool!
[20:31] ---
I just need to bite someone new.
[20:34] ---
Maria!
[20:35] ---
Now, you are one of my micro--
[20:37] ---
Did you...
[20:39] ---
...really think...
[20:43] ---
...I'd fit into this tiny piece of cloth?!
[20:46] ---
Wh-What?!
[20:48] ---
Now!
[20:56] ---
Bastard! Don't think this
is enough to thwart me!
[21:00] ---
I'll put you all in the
smallest bikinis there are--
[21:16] ---
No...!
[21:18] ---
The source of my power...!
[21:23] ---
Without that, I...
[21:26] ---
Glance.
[21:27] ---
Someone, pick--
[21:35] ---
Sorry, I let my guard down.
[21:38] ---
Don't worry about it. It turned out okay!
[21:41] ---
Enemies with brainwashing
abilities are trouble.
[21:43] ---
We'll have to learn from this.
[21:47] ---
How should we go home...?
[21:49] ---
Wahhh...!
[21:56] ---
"Before"
[21:57] ---
"him"
[21:58] ---
"all lie"
[21:59] ---
"prostrate"
[22:01] ---
In the field of vampire research,
[22:03] ---
there's nothing he doesn't
know. He's a genius!
[22:06] ---
The vampire dies in no time.
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