E4 - The Bewitching Gates

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:32] lam
    Evil God Abram, once sealed
    by the first hero Lamuness,
[01:37] lam
    is causing space-timequakes
    as he tries to revive himself.
[01:40] lam
    It's throwing Dokidoki Space into chaos.
[01:43] lam
    Abram's loyal servant, Don Genoci,
    in order to revive Abram completely,
[01:49] lam
    has conquered the Kirakira Spirit World
[01:51] lam
    and the connected Kingdom of Arara.
[01:54] lam
    In order to stop Abram's resurrection...
[01:56] lam
    Well, I became the third hero Lamuness,
[02:00] lam
    and now I'm off on an adventure
    to find the Ottama Gates,
[02:03] lam
    the only way to get to Don
    Genoci's Dimension Castle.
[02:06] lam
    I guess I'll just have to give it my best!
[02:09] lam
    Right now, my blood is totally blazing!
[02:14] lam
    This is making me blush...
SIGN    The Bewitching Gates
SIGN    The Bewitching Gates.
[02:30] ---
    Abra-kadabra, Abram!
[02:33] ---
    Abra-kadabra, Abram!
[02:36] ---
    Abra-kadabra, Abram!
[02:39] ---
    Abra-kadabra, Abram!
[02:53] don
    It seems that no matter how much I focus,
    I cannot speed up the flow of time...
[02:59] don
    Evil God Abram's revival will
    require a bit more time.
[03:04] don
    Until then...
[03:27] dan
    Those bulging muscles.
[03:29] dan
    Those trickling beads of sweat.
[03:31] dan
    That choking smell of a man's bodily aromas.
[03:34] dan
    Yes.. I am beautiful once again today.
[03:39] dan
    Mirror, mirror, on the wall.
[03:41] dan
    Who's the fairest of them all?
[03:44] dan
    Why, everyone knows it's Narcissist
    Dandy with his beautiful muscles!
[03:52] don
    Dandy!
[03:57] don
    Narcissist Dandy, are you there?
[04:00] dan
    Well, well, Lord Don Genoci.
[04:03] dan
    How can I help you, here in my private room?
[04:07] don
    Idiot!
[04:08] don
    While you're lazing around,
[04:11] don
    the hero Lamuness and his party are
    traveling in search of an Ottama Gate!
[04:16] don
    Use any methods at your disposal!
[04:18] don
    Until Abram's revival, you must not let
    them get one step closer to this castle!
[04:24] don
    Understood?
[04:25] dan
    Yes, sir...
[04:27] dan
    But even so, how am I to accomplish this?
[04:34] lip
    We just need to make it so they can't
    find the real Ottama Gate, right?
[04:38] lip
    Come on, don't stress so much about it.
[04:42] lip
    Relax.
[04:45] lip
    Relax.
[04:48] dan
    I see... not every Ottama Gate
    is necessarily a real one.
[04:53] dan
    Real one... real one...
[04:57] dan
    I've got it!
[04:59] dan
    The poultice spray has
    unlocked my brain cells!
[05:04] lip
    Oh, if that's how you get flashes of
    insight, you really must be a musclehead!
[05:09] dan
    I got the hint from the many versions
    of me reflected here in my room!
[05:14] dan
    Yes... I am beautiful!
[05:17] dan
    I'm coming for you, Lamuness!
[05:37] lam
    So hot... so heavy... so exhausting...
[05:40] lam
    Cacao, haven't you found
    the next Ottama Gate yet?
[05:44] lam
    Hey, Cacao!
[05:48] cid
    But why do we have to wander around
[05:51] cid
    in the blazing sun with no
     real destination in mind?
[05:54] cid
    I really wander what you're thinking...
[05:56] hebi
    G-Great one, darling!
[05:59] lam
    A man of passion can never stay in one place.
[06:03] lam
    That's what my DNA is telling me.
[06:06] cid
    But what if the Ottama Gate
    is in the other direction?
[06:10] cid
    This would all be for nothing.
[06:11] paf
    Well, as they say, a butterfly
    can start a hurricane!
[06:17] cid
    At least use "every drop adds to the ocean."
[06:23] lam
    You're wrong!
[06:25] lam
    It's "hard work and a nickel
    is worth the nickel."
[06:27] cid
    If you know that, then let
    us take a break, already!
[06:31] hebi
    Darling's right, jaan!
[06:32] hebi
    You're stupid, jaan! Stupid, jaan!
[06:35] pq
    You're stupid, chu.
[06:36] lam
    Gah! Shut up!
[06:39] lam
    A man's labor must be rewarded!
    That's always been the rule!
[06:43] cid
    Oh?
[06:43] cid
    You seem confident, Lamuness.
[06:45] cid
    Then if this labor I'm expending
    turns out to be futile,
[06:49] cid
    I'll ask you to make it up to me.
[06:52] hebi
    Make it up to him, jaan.
[06:53] lam
    How?
[06:54] cid
    You'll admit you're no hero,
[06:56] cid
    and give the title to me alone!
[07:01] lam
    I had a feeling that was it...
[07:04] lam
    He's such an attention hog...
[07:09] cid
    Think what you want.
[07:11] cid
    Once I have the hero title all to myself...
[07:22] cid
    Prepare for hero-larity.
[07:27] cid
    What did the hero ask for at the barber shop?
[07:30] cid
    "Just a little off da-cider!"
[07:38] cid
    I'll be able to unleash all the puns
    that only work with me as the hero!
[07:51] lam
    I won't let you have it!
[07:53] lam
    Right now, girls like me just
    because I have the hero title!
[07:56] lam
    Which means that once I save the world...
[08:04] girl
    You're so great, Hero!
[08:08] girl
    Lord Lamuness!
[08:10] girl
    Get away, unremarkable old man!
[08:13] girl
    Kissy-kiss!
[08:15] girl
    Smooch!
[08:19] lam
    This is great! This is
    why I gotta stay a hero!
[08:29] par
    What goes through these idiots' heads?
[08:32] par
    I can't believe this!
[08:40] lam
    W-What's going on?!
[08:41] paf
    Her dowsing is reaching its climax!
[08:44] cid
    I don't care! Just make her settle down!
[08:54] par
    Look out!
[09:06] par
    Just in time...
[09:07] par
    Wait, where's Lamuness?
[09:15] lam
    That was close...
[09:16] cid
    Falling off a cliff... that would
    have made quite a cliffhanger.
[09:24] cid
    Laugh, damn you all!
[09:27] par
    He really risks his life for his comedy...
[09:30] lam
    What an idiot.
[09:32] lam
    Hey, hey!
[09:33] lam
    Look at this, chu!
[09:37] par
    Hey, it's detecting an Ottama Gate!
[09:39] par
    It's right down this road!
[09:41] lam
    Huh? But that means...
[09:44] lam
    My DNA was right!
[09:48] lam
    Yeah!
[09:51] pq
    He's the quintessential idiot, chu.
[10:09] both
    Wh-What's all this?
[10:11] both
    Are they all Ottama Gates?!
[10:20] dan
    Now, can your pitiful brain cells
    identify the real Ottama Gate?
[10:40] cid
    Lamuness! Whoever finds
    the real gate first wins!
[10:45] lam
    Yeah! Bring it on!
[10:47] lam
    You're going down!
[10:54] par
    Lamuness! Do your best!
[10:57] cacao
    Lord Da Cider! You do your best, too!
[10:59] par
    Okay, let's have lunch.
[11:02] pw
    Yeah! Yeah! Lunch, chu!
[11:10] cac
    Here, Parfait.
[11:12] cac
    Thanks!
[11:13] pq
    Yeah, yeah! Sandwiches, chu!
    Sandwiches, chu!
[11:16] pq
    So delicious, chu! I can't wait, chu!
[11:21] cid
    Okay, let's start with this one!
[11:23] cid
    Go!
[11:30] lam
    This must be the real one!
[11:55] par
    What a pleasant breeze!
[12:06] lam
    After all that, we still
    haven't found the real one...
[12:11] lam
    It seems impossible...
[12:26] lam
    You're still so stubborn, Da Cider...
[12:29] cid
    So are you... but there are
    only two Ottama Gates left.
[12:33] cid
    Sorry, but it's my turn to choose next.
[12:37] lam
    When was that decided? Name
    the hour, minute, and second!
[12:40] cid
    It's always been the case!
[12:43] lip
    Dan-da-da-daan!
[12:46] lip
    It's time for our special bonus hint time!
[12:49] lip
    We're going to tell you just this once...
[12:52] lip
    This is the real Ottama Gate!
SIGN    The real one!!
[12:56] lam
    Suspicious... that's very clearly suspicious.
[12:59] cid
    It's nice to have the free help.
[13:01] hebi
    Darling, you're so lucky, jaan!
[13:03] cid
    Go!
[13:04] cid
    Now I win!
[13:13] cid
    Help!
[13:15] lam
    That idiot!
[13:22] cid
    Ocean water?
[13:25] cid
    Shucks! I've hit the squids!
SIGN    Shucks/Skids
[13:28] ---
    What a saury oct-cident!
[13:31] ---
    It's zebrall my fault!
[13:36] hebi
    Even at your worst, your puns
    are jawsome, darling... jaan.
[13:43] cid
    Idiot! Watch what you say!
[13:49] ---
    Save me, I'm begging you!
[13:52] lam
    Da Cider... I won't let
    your sacrifice be in vain!
[13:56] lam
    Thanks to you, there's only one Ottama
    Gate left, and it's the real one!
[14:01] lam
    Huh?
[14:02] cid
    I won't let you...
[14:05] lam
    I can still hear dear
    departed Da Cider's voice.
[14:09] lam
    But that's not possible...
[14:11] lam
    After all, he's surely at the bottom
     of the blue sea now. Right?
[14:15] cid
    Damn you!
[14:19] lam
    Nevertheless... I must continue
    on my mission as a hero!
[14:23] lam
    I must go, and realize my dream!
[14:26] lam
    Skip, skip! La-dee-da!
[14:31] lam
    Yeah! This means I win the competition!
[14:43] lam
    Why?!
[14:51] cid
    Hold on tight, Lamuness.
[14:53] lam
    Da Cider... did you come here to save me?
[14:57] cid
    My body just moved on its own.
[15:00] cid
    This is the sad fate of a hero.
[15:02] cid
    If anything were to happen to you...
[15:06] cid
    If anything were to happen to you...
[15:10] cid
    What does a hero take on
    the sea? A he-rowboat!
[15:18] cid
    If anything were to happen to you...
[15:22] lam
    W-What's with the sinister grin?
    Don't tell me...
[15:27] cid
    I'm sorry, Lamuness.
[15:29] cid
    I can't seem to hold up both of our weight.
[15:33] cid
    Don't worry about me.
[15:36] cid
    Just let go!
[15:39] lam
    You're not the one who gets to say that!
[15:41] lam
    I'll never ever let go!
[15:44] cid
    Don't be so unreasonable, Lamuness!
[15:50] cac
    Oh? What's that, now?
[15:56] dan
    And now, the big reveal: They were all fake!
[16:00] ---
    I call this "Operation: Which is the Real One?
[16:03] ---
    Actually, They're All Fake,
    You're so Stupid, Nyah-Nyah!"
[16:08] lip
    It's playfully on-the-nose, don't you think?
[16:16] par
    Lamuness is in trouble!
[16:19] pq
    Pikyu?
[16:20] paf
    PQ! It's your turn!
[16:23] pq
    Chu!
[16:30] cid
    I don't wanna die here!
[16:33] pq
    Goodbye, chu!
[16:41] dan
    What the...
[16:42] lip
    Oh, my! It's so bright!
[16:53] dan
    What?
[16:55] lip
    Oh, my!
[16:56] lam
    Damn... I knew it was strange!
[16:59] cid
    So you two set all this up?
[17:02] hebi
    Darling was so close to becoming
    the main character, too!
[17:05] hebi
    Darling, get it done, jaan!
[17:08] cid
    That's right! Lamuness, let's go!
[17:10] lam
    You said it!
[17:13] dan
    Damn you!
[17:38] lam
    Kaiser Fiblade!
[18:01] both
    Don't hurt me!
[18:01] both
    I knew this would happen!
[18:15] cid
    Well, I'm glad we made it through safely,
    but it was pretty dicey for a sec, there.
[18:21] lam
    And whose fault was it?!
[18:24] cid
    Right. I also get credit for pretending
[18:27] cid
    to be beaten by the enemies
    and falling in with you.
[18:31] hebi
    That's my darling, jaan!
[18:36] cid
    Damn you!
[18:39] coc
    Um, what happened to the Ottama Gate, then?
[18:44] lam
    That's right!
[18:46] lam
    Hey!
[19:08] don
    Abra-kadabra, Abram!
[19:20] don
    What is this unsettling omen?
[19:22] don
    Can it be...
[19:26] dan
    Damn you, Lamuness!
[19:28] dan
    Next time, I'll come up with an even more
    beautiful plan, and defeat you for good!
[19:34] lip
    Please do!
[19:55] par
    This must be it!
[19:57] par
    This is the Gaogao Zone
    we've been searching for!
[20:00] cac
    I'm so moved, I...
[20:04] lam
    Look at that huge sun!
[20:06] lam
    Right now, my heart is totally soaring!
[20:09] cid
    Yeah. Looking at this sunset, I feel
    like a fool for being so petty.
[20:16] cid
    Lamuness.
[20:17] lam
    Yeah. Let's work together
    from now on, Da Cider!
[20:22] lam
    Right.
[20:28] par
    Lamuness... Da Cider...
[20:32] cid
    Just don't trip me up any
    more, okay, Lamuness?
[20:38] lam
    And you stop getting in my way, Da Cider!
[20:47] lam
    That hurts!
[20:49] ad
    Don't you dare, you brat!
[20:52] ad
    Stop being so petty!
[20:53] ---
    What was that?!
[20:54] ---
    What's with you?!
[20:55] par
    I don't believe it!
[20:58] ---
    Shut up!
[21:03] mito
    Welcome to Gaogao Zone.
[21:05] mito
    We protect the peace of the jungle!
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[22:23] ---
    The people of the Gaogao Zone
    gave us the warmest welcome ever!
[22:29] ---
    Okay, before we get searching,
    let's have a bath!
[22:32] ---
    What's this? A meal with our bath?
[22:34] ---
    How kind of you!
[22:35] ---
    What? What's on the menu, you say?
[22:38] ---
    Next time, on VS Knight Lamune & 40 Fire:
[22:41] ---
    "The Dangerous Hero Stew!"
[22:44] ---
    Right now, my blood is totally blazing!
SIGN    The Dangerous Hero Stew
[22:47] ---
    This is making me blush...