E1 - 501st, Take Off?

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
    The 501st Joint Fighter Wing,
    AKA "Strike Witches,"
[00:05] ---
    a team of elite aces who achieved great
    success in the battle against the Neuroi.
[00:09] ---
    These rare and valuable records depict
    a side of them never seen before.
[01:46] ---
    The 501st Joint Fighter Wing is humanity's
    defense against the Neuroi.
[01:47] ---
    "501st, Take Off?"
[01:51] ---
    It's been several days since I,
    Miyafuji Yoshika, joined up.
[01:56] ---
    I do the cooking and washing
    every morning and every night.
[01:59] ---
    Being a soldier is a busy job!
[02:01] ---
    I'd thought I was coming to
    the front lines to keep
[02:04] ---
    everyone safe from the Neuroi, but...
[02:07] ---
    I'm not sure how this is
    any different than home.
[02:10] ---
    Morning, Miyafuji.
[02:12] ---
    Barkhorn! Good morning!
[02:15] ---
    Sorry you have to make
    breakfast every morning.
[02:17] ---
    No, I always did the same thing at home.
[02:20] ---
    I'm really sorry. Nobody else
    is capable of waking up on time.
[02:23] ---
    I thought that every
    soldier was like Sakamoto.
[02:29] ---
    "Hahahaha!"
[02:29] ---
    I actually use her morning practice
    as an alarm clock...
[02:33] ---
    Don't worry. I do the same thing.
[02:38] ---
    Did you used to make
    breakfast all by yourself?
[02:41] ---
    No, we took turns.
[02:44] ---
    Part of eating military food is that
    even if it's bad, you can't complain.
[02:50] ---
    Each morning,
[02:51] ---
    I thought it would be my stomach,
    not the Neuroi, that would be the end of me.
[02:54] ---
    The worst of them all was Mina,
    because she had no idea.
[02:58] ---
    Wing Commander Mina?
[03:00] ---
    If she heard something was healthy,
[03:01] ---
    she'd throw it in without
    thinking about how it tasted
[03:03] ---
    or how much of it she really needed.
[03:04] ---
    And during emergency missions
    she'd feed us food dissolved
[03:07] ---
    by diluted hydrochloric acid,
    so we could digest it faster.
[03:13] ---
    They say cooking is about
    love and caring, Miyafuji.
[03:17] ---
    That's a huge misunderstanding!
[03:19] ---
    I almost wish I could've tried it,
    just to see what it was like.
[03:22] ---
    It's better that you didn't.
[03:24] ---
    Good morning, Yoshika.
[03:26] ---
    I'll help you.
[03:27] ---
    Okay, make the salad.
[03:31] ---
    The whole head...?
[03:33] ---
    I'm all done, so I'm gonna go
    work on something else.
[03:36] ---
    You're done? No seasoning?
[03:38] ---
    And she's better than most!
[03:40] ---
    Oh, it's time.
[03:42] ---
    Time to wake everyone up, right?
[03:44] ---
    May I go with you?
[03:47] ---
    Is it your first time going
    to wake up the others?
[03:49] ---
    I've never been to everyone's room.
[03:52] ---
    We're waking up Lucchini today, so we'll
    need some ropes and our Striker Units.
[03:57] ---
    We're just going to wake her up, right?
[04:00] ---
    She always sleeps somewhere different,
[04:01] ---
    and sometimes outdoors,
    so we'll have to search for her.
[04:04] ---
    This wouldn't take so long if only
    we knew where she was.
[04:07] ---
    Good morning, everyone.
[04:09] ---
    Great timing, Mina.
[04:12] ---
    Lucchini is on her way here with Charlotte.
[04:15] ---
    Sanya and Eila were on night patrol,
    so there's no need to wake them up today.
[04:20] ---
    I see. If it's just Hartmann, all I need
    is this good whacking stick here.
[04:25] ---
    We're going to wake them up, right?
[04:27] ---
    Eila is in Sanya's room?
[04:30] ---
    Let's go, Miyafuji.
[04:32] ---
    Right!
[04:33] ---
    Oh, sorry... Can you watch the pot for me?
[04:37] ---
    Sure thi--
[04:38] ---
    Leave it to me!
[04:39] ---
    Everybody's been tired lately, so I need
    to whip up something extra special!
[04:44] ---
    Hartmann's a hero back home, isn't she?
[04:48] ---
    I guess, yeah.
[04:50] ---
    I'm sure she's got all these medals
    and stuff lined up on her walls!
[04:54] ---
    I'm kind of jealous!
[04:59] ---
    Morning, Hartmann.
[05:01] ---
    Morning, Trude...
[05:04] ---
    I think I stepped on something and broke it!
[05:07] ---
    Clean your damn room!
[05:08] ---
    And don't go back to sleep!
[05:11] ---
    Is she like this every day?
[05:14] ---
    Yeah.
[05:15] ---
    Want to take a turn, Miyafuji?
[05:17] ---
    Hey, should we wake up Perrine, too?
[05:22] ---
    Squadron Leader! I brought you a towel!
[05:25] ---
    Thanks, as always.
[05:27] ---
    She gets up even earlier than
    our honorary alarm clock.
[05:31] ---
    Morning!
[05:32] ---
    Good morning, Charlotte! Lucchini!
[05:36] ---
    You know, ever since Miyafuji came
    I've looked forward to meals so much.
[05:40] ---
    Aww, you don't mean that.
[05:42] ---
    Food needs to be something
    you look forward to!
[05:44] ---
    Good morning, everyone.
[05:46] ---
    No way...
[05:48] ---
    I just asked her to stir
    the pot so it didn't burn...
[05:50] ---
    Who'd you have watch her?
[05:52] ---
    Lynne was here...
[05:54] ---
    She said she had a sudden stomachache
    and would be taking the day off.
[05:58] ---
    She ran away...
[06:00] ---
    Now let's eat!
[06:02] ---
    I made you all something special.
[06:03] ---
    Please, no!
[06:06] ---
    I'll be the first to try it.
[06:07] ---
    Barkhorn, we don't know what's in it!
[06:10] ---
    Trude! No, sister!
[06:14] ---
    Here I go...
[06:16] ---
    Sister! Sister is...
[06:19] ---
    I'm making a strategic retreat...
[06:21] ---
    No fair! Me too! Me too!
[06:23] ---
    You guys are being silly.
[06:24] ---
    It just goes up the throat
    easily, that's all.
[06:26] ---
    It's supposed to go down the throat, not up.
[06:29] ---
    It's good for constipation, too.
[06:31] ---
    It is, huh?
[06:32] ---
    How can she look at what happened
    and still be smiling?
[06:36] ---
    Now, we've got a long day
    ahead of us, so let's eat.
[06:42] ---
    Everyone, the enemy is attacking!
[06:44] ---
    Get to your stations immediately!
[06:46] ---
    Thank you, Neuroi!
[06:48] ---
    Yesterday's enemy is today's savior!
[06:51] ---
    Mina's Special Healthy Soup!
[06:54] ---
    Miyafuji, got a second?
[06:56] ---
    Sure.
[06:57] ---
    About today's training...
[07:00] ---
    Um, it's a marathon,
    followed by sword practice,
[07:02] ---
    and then weight training.
    Lots of stamina-building, right?
[07:05] ---
    Yeah. That was the plan, but...
[07:08] ---
    "Kitchen"
    "No Unauthorized Personnel Allowed"
[07:09] ---
    But I kept getting requests to leave you
    enough stamina to cook for everybody.
[07:15] ---
    So I'm going to have you
    follow someone around instead.
[07:18] ---
    Anybody you'd like to follow, specifically?
[07:19] ---
    Us!
[07:20] ---
    "Us!"
[07:20] ---
    "Us!"
[07:20] ---
    --How about Barkhorn...
    --Us! Us! Us! Us! Us!
[07:23] ---
    "Us!"
    "Us!"
[07:23] ---
    Us! Us! Us!
[07:24] ---
    "Us!"
[07:24] ---
    "Us!"
[07:25] ---
    "Us!"
[07:26] ---
    "Us!"
[07:28] ---
    It'd be great if I could go with you two...
[07:32] ---
    I-I see...
[07:34] ---
    Is this really a good idea?
[07:36] ---
    You worry too much, Squadron Leader.
[07:38] ---
    Leave it to us, and it'll be fine!
[07:41] ---
    "Holds World Record for
    'Most Times Confined To Quarters.'"
[07:42] ---
    You're talking to a super ace from
    the land of rules and regulations, and...!
[07:45] ---
    "Speed Demon,
    Goes For Top Speed Over All Else"
[07:45] ---
    A super ace from the land of the free!
[07:48] ---
    What is there to worry about?
[07:52] ---
    The good parts.
[07:53] ---
    Only copy their good parts.
[07:55] ---
    L-Lynne, why don't you join me?
[07:58] ---
    It's a good opportunity. Lynne, you should go
    and see if you can't learn something.
[08:03] ---
    Squadron Leader Sakamoto...
[08:04] ---
    What is it, Lynne?
[08:06] ---
    I'd like to spend the day practicing
    my inherent magic instead!
[08:11] ---
    That's right! Gotta train!
[08:13] ---
    "Kitchen"
[08:13] ---
    I-I see.
[08:15] ---
    I guess that's okay.
[08:18] ---
    Thanks.
[08:19] ---
    She ran.
[08:20] ---
    Make sure you get ready,
    'cause you're gonna get a tan.
[08:22] ---
    You're on standby duty today, aren't you?
[08:26] ---
    I'll be waiting outside.
[08:28] ---
    Avoiding sunburn...
[08:30] ---
    You're out under the burning sun all day,
    waiting for the Neuroi.
[08:33] ---
    Wait a second.
[08:34] ---
    I'll get you something.
[08:40] ---
    I told you, you're gonna get a tan!
[08:42] ---
    Why are you dressed like that, Miyafuji?!
[08:44] ---
    Wait, I'm the one doing this wrong?
[08:47] ---
    "On Standby"
[08:49] ---
    "On Standby"
[08:55] ---
    It may not look like it, but we're
    really waiting for the Neuroi.
[08:59] ---
    But there's not actually anything
    to do when you're on standby.
[09:02] ---
    That's why we use the time when we're
    on guard duty to strengthen our weapons!
[09:06] ---
    Your weapons?
[09:08] ---
    That's right! The superweapon
    that is this sexy girl's body!
[09:14] ---
    Why don't you say that again,
    nice and loud, miss sexy girl?
[09:18] ---
    You have no right to accuse us of slacking!
[09:21] ---
    Do you know what lies on
    the other side of this sea?
[09:24] ---
    The lands of mainland Europe,
    which were conquered by the Neuroi.
[09:27] ---
    Curse you, Neuroi! Give back my homeland!
[09:30] ---
    These relaxing chairs allow us
    to endure long hours
[09:32] ---
    without putting stress on our bodies!
[09:35] ---
    I see!
[09:36] ---
    I'm sorry for suspecting you.
[09:38] ---
    You should be sorry.
[09:40] ---
    Well, as long as you understand.
[09:42] ---
    You're facing towards
    northern Europe, not central.
[09:46] ---
    Now stand up!
[09:47] ---
    Watch out, Trude!
    You better not touch us!
[09:51] ---
    What if we told you the sunburn
    hurts so much we can't move?
[09:56] ---
    Sakamoto, I couldn't find
    any good parts to learn from.
[10:00] ---
    Well, forget those idiots.
[10:03] ---
    Now that I'm here, don't worry
    about a thing, Miyafuji.
[10:05] ---
    Okay...
[10:07] ---
    You don't want to get a sunburn.
[10:09] ---
    Wear this.
[10:10] ---
    "On Standby"
[10:13] ---
    Miyafuji Yoshika is struck
    down with heatstroke.
[10:16] ---
    Everyone goes back to taking
    turns cooking, like they used to.
[10:21] ---
    "Superweapon"
[10:21] ---
    Superweapon!
[11:54] ---
    "Yamakawa Michiko's
    Strike Witches Classroom"
[11:55] ---
    Hello, everyone.
[11:57] ---
    I'm Yamakawa Michiko,
    the best friend of Miyafuji Yoshika,
[12:02] ---
    who one day was approached by Squadron Leader
[12:05] ---
    Sakamoto Mio of the Fuso Empire,
[12:08] ---
    and joined the 501st Joint Fighter Wing.
[12:12] ---
    In this segment I'll introduce you to
    the various members of the 501st.
[12:19] ---
    For our first lesson, I'll be introducing you
    to the 501st Joint Fighter Wing itself!
[12:25] ---
    This unit is a dream team formed from
    the best aces around the world.
[12:30] ---
    The cold and unemotional ace pilot of Suomus,
    who's said to have never even been hit.
[12:35] ---
    The ace pilot of Romagna, who's normally
    very serious but gets aggressive in combat!
[12:41] ---
    The super ace of Liberion,
    who's always calm and composed
[12:44] ---
    when she takes down the Neuroi.
[12:47] ---
    And the quiet expert of Karlsland,
[12:52] ---
    who holds the world record for Neuroi kills!
[12:53] ---
    "Holds World Record for
    'Most Times Confined To Quarters.'"
[12:55] ---
    These are just a few of this
    dream team's legendary pilots.
[13:03] ---
    Yoshika's so amazing, the way she gets
    to be with all these incredible people!
[13:12] ---
    It's me, Yamakawa Michiko from Fuso.
[13:15] ---
    The military's famous for keeping things
    maintained and running smoothly!
[13:18] ---
    The inside of the base
    is probably really clean!
[13:20] ---
    Next time: "501st, Clean Your Dirty Rooms?"
[13:20] ---
    "Next time:
    501st, Clean Your Dirty Rooms?"
[13:24] ---
    You've never seen witches like these before!
[13:27] ---
    
[13:30] ---