E2 - Mash Burnedead and the Mysterious Maze
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
The Easton Magic Academy.
[00:03] ---
A historic and prestigious school
that has produced
[00:08] ---
numerous pillars of the magic realm.
[00:10] ---
Of course, its entrance examination
is notoriously difficult.
[00:13] ---
Not even 3% of the applicants
will be admitted.
[00:16] ---
Only those with superior magical powers
will be able to open the gates of Easton.
[00:22] ---
Only those
with superior magical powers...
[02:00] ---
Let's see,
among this year's applicants are...
[02:05] ---
CLAUDE LUCCI
[02:06] ---
A scion of established nobility, and then
the undersecretary's son from the Bureau of Magic.
[02:11] ---
All the bigwigs of society, so to speak.
[02:15] ---
Maintenance of wands
and reviewing of grimoires.
[02:17] ---
They're devoting themselves to the exam.
[02:20] ---
It's only proper to have ambitious candidates
for a school as prestigious as ours.
[02:21] ---
HMPH CLANG CLANG HMPH
[02:23] ---
HMPH CLANG CLANG HMPH
[02:25] ---
HMPH CLANG CLANG HMPH
[02:26] ---
HMPH CLANG CLANG HMPH
[02:32] ---
WHAT
[02:33] ---
What the...
[02:33] ---
THE
[02:35] ---
Huh? What's going on?
[02:36] ---
We're starting an entrance exam
for a magic school now.
[02:40] ---
Why is someone pumping iron?
[02:42] ---
No, calm down.
Maybe I'm imagining things.
[02:45] ---
This is a magic school.
Slackers like that would never be here.
[02:50] ---
He's doing the invisible chair
while reading a fitness book!
[02:50] ---
BAM
[02:54] ---
Does he even want to pass this exam?
At least read some books about magic!
[02:58] ---
Consumption of protein within 45 minutes
of training is the most basic of fundamentals.
[03:01] ---
And he's talking to himself!
[03:03] ---
And who are those guys behind him?
They're anything but inconspicuous!
[03:08] ---
Are you sure this will work?
[03:09] ---
WHISPER WHISPER
[03:11] ---
Mash can't use magic.
[03:13] ---
You don't trust me and my plans?
[03:16] ---
I made his scar
indistinguishable from a real one.
[03:19] ---
I'm sure we'll get a kick outta this.
[03:22] ---
Oh, well.
[03:23] ---
Slackers like that
will fail the exam anyway.
[03:27] ---
NOM NOM
[03:27] ---
I wonder what the exam is like.
[03:29] ---
I have to pass it, no matter
what it turns out to be.
[03:32] ---
Greetings!
[03:35] ---
Welcome to Easton Magic Academy.
[03:43] ---
I am overseeing today's entrance examination.
My name is Claude Lucci.
[03:47] ---
The pleasure's all mine.
[03:49] ---
C-Claude Lucci!
[03:51] ---
This year's seventh
best up-and-coming mage!
[03:54] ---
He's said to have mastered countless
advanced spells despite his youth!
[03:59] ---
How exhilarating.
[04:01] ---
Praise and worship me even more!
[04:04] ---
It must've been hot
coming out of the fire like that.
[04:08] ---
I'm definitely going to flunk him!
[04:10] ---
Now, let's start our first exam.
[04:13] ---
Take your seats.
[04:15] ---
Seats?
[04:16] ---
There are no seats!
[04:19] ---
What?
[04:24] ---
- Desks just appeared!
- Amazing!
[04:29] ---
- Wh-Whoa!
- I've never seen magic like this!
[04:32] ---
No wonder they have
high hopes for this professor!
[04:34] ---
You could've just taken us to a room
that was already set up.
[04:38] ---
I'll kill him.
[04:40] ---
No matter.
[04:41] ---
The acceptance rate
of this exam is three percent.
[04:44] ---
There's no way
slackers like him will pass.
[04:48] ---
You have 30 minutes!
[04:50] ---
Now, begin!
[04:55] ---
The test paper...
[04:57] ---
The questions are squirming around?
[05:01] ---
That's right, I have enchanted
the test papers with my magic.
[05:06] ---
Thus, to pass this exam you need to dispel
the magic and properly line up the questions.
[05:12] ---
He'll never pull this off.
[05:14] ---
Why'd I think
this would work the other day?
[05:17] ---
WRIGGLE WRIGGLE
[05:18] ---
Could you kindly stop moving?
[05:22] ---
WRIGGLE WRIGGLE
[05:26] ---
Kindly... stop moving.
[05:31] ---
What?
[05:32] ---
I finished.
[05:34] ---
That guy from earlier...
[05:36] ---
I'm sure it's just
some random scribbles...
[05:42] ---
It's aligned so perfectly.
[05:45] ---
He's making that boulder float so easily!
[05:50] ---
Whoa! He's running on water!
[05:53] ---
From that point on, Mash...
[05:55] ---
somehow found ways
to pass the tests.
[06:01] ---
How can a slacker like that
still be here?
[06:04] ---
That tasteless brat
who makes a mockery of me...
[06:04] ---
NOM NOM
[06:08] ---
Then I guess I must...
[06:10] ---
This is the next test!
[06:12] ---
Hey, the ground again is...
[06:21] ---
In the next test, you will solve this maze.
[06:24] ---
Of course, this is no ordinary maze.
[06:26] ---
There are various traps set within.
[06:30] ---
You have 30 minutes!
[06:32] ---
Reach the goal by the time limit,
and you pass!
[06:36] ---
Now, begin!
[06:39] ---
So I have to get to the goal area?
[06:41] ---
Sounds pretty easy.
[06:43] ---
Excuse me!
[06:45] ---
Can I tag along with you?
[06:48] ---
LEMON IRVINE
[06:51] ---
Why?
[06:51] ---
Huh? Um...
[06:54] ---
I think it'd be more efficient
if we worked together.
[06:59] ---
Makes sense.
[07:01] ---
Th-Thank you very much!
[07:06] ---
I wonder what kind of traps
will be waiting for us?
[07:06] ---
TP TP TP
[07:09] ---
CLINK
[07:10] ---
FACEPLANT
[07:13] ---
It hurts!
[07:15] ---
IMPS HAVE APPEARED!
[07:17] ---
GATHER GATHER
[07:18] ---
This maze has imps!
[07:20] ---
Please save me!
[07:23] ---
HANDLIKE-SOMETHINGS HAVE APPEARED!
[07:24] ---
Th-This ground is trying to grab us!
[07:29] ---
Don't leave me behind!
[07:36] ---
Please wait.
[07:38] ---
Please don't leave me behind!
[07:44] ---
What was that about efficiency?
[07:49] ---
We have to hurry.
[07:52] ---
Levios Cuffus!
[07:57] ---
What are these?
[07:59] ---
I'm sorry I deceived you
this whole time.
[08:02] ---
There's a certain reason
I have to keep you away from the goal.
[08:05] ---
What reason?
[08:07] ---
I-I don't want to tell you,
that's why it's a certain reason!
[08:11] ---
So I've been deceived?
[08:13] ---
That's useless.
Human strength can't break...
[08:16] ---
I'm sorry...
[08:19] ---
but I have my own certain reason, too.
[08:23] ---
Later.
[08:26] ---
STARE...
[08:28] ---
Th-This is bad!
I have to chase and stop him.
[08:32] ---
Four legs in the morning.
[08:37] ---
Two legs in the afternoon,
and three legs at night.
[08:43] ---
What is this creature?
[08:45] ---
This is totally
one of the dangerous ones.
[08:50] ---
It's only a test.
I'll use my magic and...
[08:59] ---
Answer my riddle.
[09:03] ---
Oh no. My knees gave out.
[09:06] ---
Bad, really bad. This is a riddle?
[09:08] ---
What's the answer?
[09:10] ---
Four legs in the morning,
two at noon, three at night...
[09:15] ---
Oh, this sucks. I'm panicking
and I can't think straight!
[09:19] ---
Time's up. Thou shalt be punished.
[09:25] ---
Help...
[09:27] ---
That's not right.
[09:29] ---
This truly is punishment
for selfishly deceiving others.
[09:35] ---
I'm so terrible.
[09:38] ---
I'm sorry, Mushroom Head.
[09:45] ---
Such a creature...
[09:47] ---
can't possibly exist.
[09:55] ---
Wh-Why did you bother
to come back and save me?
[09:59] ---
Well...
[10:01] ---
If your reason was similar to mine,
I'd kinda feel sorry for you.
[10:09] ---
But it looks like
we won't make it in time from here.
[10:14] ---
How do you think
I came here in an instant?
[10:22] ---
Time is almost up.
[10:24] ---
Multiple traps
and the guardian of the labyrinth...
[10:26] ---
And the student I recruited to stop him.
[10:29] ---
Since I put in this much effort,
I'm sure he...
[10:33] ---
Hey, what's with that loud noise?
[10:35] ---
Sounds like something is breaking!
[10:37] ---
Th-There's no way.
[10:39] ---
These walls are one meter thick
and are impervious to all magic.
[10:46] ---
The walls!
[10:53] ---
H-He trudged straight outta there!
[11:00] ---
Quite a curious young man.
[11:08] ---
Is that allowed?
Can he really do that?
[11:10] ---
There's no way he can!
[11:11] ---
That's cheating!
[11:13] ---
Gimme a break!
[11:15] ---
Go home! Go home! Go home!
[11:21] ---
SLUMP
[11:22] ---
I want to go home.
[11:24] ---
That's absurd.
It's no longer a labyrinth!
[11:27] ---
Indeed.
[11:28] ---
You're supposed to get lost
in a maze before exiting!
[11:30] ---
Good point.
[11:31] ---
What is a maze for you?
[11:33] ---
Philosophy.
[11:34] ---
Go home! Go home! Go home!
[11:38] ---
P-Please stop! It wasn't his fault!
[11:43] ---
Stop it!
[11:45] ---
If you say anything, you'll regret it!
[11:46] ---
I can still reconsider that promise for now.
[11:49] ---
- I was...
- Hey!
[11:51] ---
I was intentionally getting in his way
so he wouldn't reach the goal.
[11:55] ---
Professor Lucci asked me to.
[11:59] ---
He told me he would pass me
if I got in his way.
[12:03] ---
My family is poor, and I desperately
wanted to be accepted for their sake.
[12:08] ---
But he still saved me,
and then said to me,
[12:13] ---
BLUSH
[12:13] ---
"Please marry me"!
[12:15] ---
No, I didn't say that.
[12:17] ---
I mean...
[12:19] ---
If you're injured, I can piggyback you.
[12:21] ---
Huh? Wait, that means...
[12:24] ---
I'm a burden, you know?
[12:25] ---
(EMOTIONAL) BURDEN
[12:27] ---
I don't really mind burdens at all.
[12:28] ---
(PHYSICAL) BURDEN
[12:31] ---
AWWWW
[12:32] ---
Don't be so bashful.
[12:32] ---
FLUSTER FLUSTER
[12:34] ---
I know how you really feel.
[12:38] ---
It was really great. Yeah.
[12:41] ---
No, I totally didn't say that.
[12:45] ---
That's right. What about it?
[12:47] ---
I'm the examiner.
[12:49] ---
What's bad about trying
to fail students I don't like?
[12:53] ---
A cheeky brat and a pauper girl.
[12:56] ---
I reached out thinking even scum can be
useful, but you bit the hand that fed you.
[13:02] ---
Is your stupidity
inherited from your parents?
[13:05] ---
No wonder you have a miserable life.
[13:12] ---
I'm failing you both.
[13:15] ---
If you want to complain,
then challenge the decision.
[13:17] ---
Challenge me,
a Magus Cum Laude Professor!
[13:21] ---
Of course, that's only if you dare!
[13:29] ---
That's going too far, Professor.
[13:31] ---
What?
[13:33] ---
Wow. He broke that wand.
[13:36] ---
That's just the type of kid he is, huh?
[13:39] ---
I kinda feel sorry for him.
[13:41] ---
Shut up! Why would I even—
[13:43] ---
Silence!
[13:48] ---
Headmaster Wahlberg.
[13:50] ---
We will now begin the final interviews.
[13:53] ---
From this point on,
I will take charge of the examination.
[13:57] ---
Headmaster, why are you here?
[14:00] ---
Lucci.
[14:02] ---
See me in my office after this.
[14:05] ---
A-As you wish.
[14:09] ---
Now, let's start with our first applicant.
[14:19] ---
We will now begin the final interview
for Mash Burnedead.
[14:25] ---
Thank you for having me.
[14:27] ---
First, let's hear
why you chose our academy.
[14:38] ---
To live in peace with my family.
[14:42] ---
That's not an answer.
[14:44] ---
What does that mean?
[14:45] ---
It's fine.
[14:47] ---
Next question.
[14:49] ---
Is it true that you saved a girl in the maze test,
although you didn't have time to?
[14:56] ---
I guess so.
[14:57] ---
What made you do so,
even by risking to fail the test?
[15:03] ---
I kinda felt like I would regret it.
[15:08] ---
You seem to be the type
who acts before thinking.
[15:13] ---
You never considered
that the sphinx might be stronger,
[15:16] ---
or that you may not be able
to break the walls?
[15:22] ---
Well, even if I considered,
it still had to be done.
[15:28] ---
Extremely amusing.
[15:30] ---
But you can only say that because
you don't understand the ways of the world yet.
[15:36] ---
Many creatures that are stronger
than you exist in this world.
[15:41] ---
If you were to face something
that overwhelmingly outpowers you,
[15:45] ---
would you still be able
to take the same course of action?
[15:51] ---
Even if you were...
[15:59] ---
facing me?
[16:03] ---
What immense magical power.
[16:06] ---
And this spell!
[16:12] ---
What is this?
[16:14] ---
This is an ancient spell that transfers the soul
of the target's most cherished one into a doll.
[16:24] ---
SLUMP
[16:24] ---
Gramps?
[16:25] ---
What's wrong? Gramps! Hey!
[16:28] ---
Of course, that's not all.
[16:31] ---
If I were to stab a knife
into the soulful doll...
[16:35] ---
that being would never return.
[16:44] ---
Didn't I already tell you?
[16:46] ---
I am immensely more powerful than you.
[16:50] ---
You can't do anything in your current state.
[16:54] ---
And in a situation like this,
what would you...
[17:06] ---
You can't keep something
this huge out forever.
[17:11] ---
This is an endurance contest, right?
[17:19] ---
Power can be used to harm or to help.
[17:24] ---
It all depends
on the wielder of that power.
[17:28] ---
That is the reason why I put emphasis...
[17:32] ---
on protecting the weak,
and regulating the strong.
[17:36] ---
Noblesse Oblige.
One's capacity as a powerful being.
[17:43] ---
And according to my observations,
you are a human who possesses that capacity.
[17:58] ---
My apologies.
[18:00] ---
I was literally testing you.
[18:03] ---
I had no intention of that nature.
[18:07] ---
Don't worry about it.
[18:11] ---
What is it?
[18:13] ---
What you asked earlier, Headmaster.
[18:15] ---
The answer to the question
"If I had to face the Headmaster..."
[18:21] ---
If it comes to that,
I'd knock the stuffing out of you...
[18:23] ---
with my fist.
[18:27] ---
What insolence!
[18:28] ---
Are you insane?
[18:33] ---
Welcome to Easton Magic Academy.
[18:39] ---
Are you okay, old man?
[18:41] ---
Be gentle with me.
[18:43] ---
And so, a lot of things happened.
[18:46] ---
But Mash Burnedead passed the entrance exam
for Easton Magic Academy.
[18:52] ---
Today, we will be learning one of the most
basic of spells, the lock-opening spell.
[18:57] ---
You must imagine opening the lock
as you infuse it with magic energy.
[19:00] ---
Opti Ars.
[19:04] ---
Now, let's actually try it.
[19:10] ---
Professor. I opened it.
[19:14] ---
Why you little, that's not...
That's not it at all, damn it!
[19:19] ---
This is a magic school, you know?
[19:21] ---
A place where you learn magic!
[19:23] ---
Well, I...
[19:26] ---
I'm not good with magic and the like.
[19:28] ---
Why are you even here?
[19:31] ---
Looks like I have a hard path ahead.
[19:33] ---
Why are you sounding like
it's not your business?
[19:35] ---
What kind of nerves do you have?
[19:37] ---
What's with this year's transfers?
[19:40] ---
There's someone who's clearly bad news!
[19:43] ---
God is dead.
[19:45] ---
Where the hell did that come from?
Seriously creepy!
[19:45] ---
I definitely don't want to be around him.
[19:48] ---
Where are you looking at now?
[19:49] ---
Listen! Listen to what others have to say!
[19:55] ---
Since this is a boarding school...
[19:57] ---
I really don't want to be roommates
with people like that.
[20:01] ---
Let's see, my room...
[20:05] ---
Huh, wait...
[20:06] ---
The door...
[20:14] ---
I'm Finn Ames.
Nice to be rooming with you.
[20:17] ---
FINN AMES
[20:20] ---
I'm Mash Burnedead.
[20:22] ---
I don't really know a lot, so I might
cause trouble, but it's nice to room with you.
[20:27] ---
Huh? He's surprisingly normal?
[20:30] ---
And this is Kevin.
[20:33] ---
This one's Mike.
[20:35] ---
This guy names his muscles! Freaky!
And when did he change clothes?
[20:35] ---
Down here are Tom and Kim.
Over here are Yamada, Koji, and Satomi.
[20:41] ---
W-Well, you can ask me
anything you don't know.
[20:45] ---
The dorm pairs up transfers and continuing
students together as roommates.
[20:50] ---
It's customary to help each other out.
[20:53] ---
I see.
[20:54] ---
Be nice for now.
[20:56] ---
Nice, and distant.
[20:58] ---
This is for a peaceful school life.
[21:02] ---
Can I ask you one thing?
[21:03] ---
Sure.
[21:04] ---
How do you get to be
the academy's "Divine Visionary"?
[21:08] ---
Oh, a Divine Visionary?
[21:11] ---
You have to collect gold coins.
[21:13] ---
Tests, coursework, extracurriculars, school life.
We're evaluated on everything.
[21:18] ---
Based on the evaluations, you're given
coins of gold, silver, or bronze.
[21:23] ---
Regardless of coins earned,
[21:25] ---
if you can't keep your grades up
each semester, you'll be expelled.
[21:30] ---
I had a vague feeling,
but this is really brutal.
[21:35] ---
Looks like he'll be expelled real quick.
[21:37] ---
So that's why we're all desperate.
[21:39] ---
Including me, of course.
[21:41] ---
Best of luck to you, too.
[21:43] ---
Finn made sure not to say,
"Let's do our best together."
[21:47] ---
You're a great guy.
[21:49] ---
And Mash was very simple.
[21:52] ---
You want a cream puff?
[21:54] ---
Huh? Where did you pull those out of?
[21:56] ---
I'll take one, though.
[21:59] ---
Will Mash with no magical powers
really be able to become the Divine Visionary?
[22:00] ---
NOM NOM
[23:35] ---
NEXT EPISODE
MASH BURNEDEAD AND THE BALEFUL BULLY
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