E1 - Mash Burnedead and the Body of the Gods
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] ---
This is the Magic Realm.
[00:03] ---
It is called the Magic Realm
because it is a world that has magic.
[00:08] ---
Flying through the sky with a broom,
levitating heavy objects,
[00:12] ---
creating something out of nothing...
[00:16] ---
Everyone can use magic at their will,
[00:19] ---
and in this world,
magic is a natural part of everyday life.
[00:23] ---
Magic is believed to be a gift
bestowed by God,
[00:26] ---
and mastery of magic determines
one's social status in this world.
[00:33] ---
In a corner of this world,
where dragons flying about is ordinary...
SIGN TREMBLE TREMBLE
[00:38] ---
Within that deep, deep forest,
[00:41] ---
there is one whose existence
defies the natural order.
[00:53] ---
Nothing like a cream puff
after pumping iron.
[02:31] ---
My name is Regro Burnedead.
[02:34] ---
I'm a chic and elegant 75-year-old
[02:36] ---
living with my son in a forest
far from other humans.
SIGN REGRO BURNEDEAD
[02:45] ---
I was quite reckless
in all sorts of ways in my youth,
[02:49] ---
but when you get as old as I,
very little bothers you.
[02:54] ---
And that’s because,
[02:56] ---
through my experiences,
I have acquired ways to combat stress.
[03:02] ---
How to combat stress...
SIGN RRRAAWR
[03:07] ---
Oh, Pops. I'm home.
SIGN MASH BURNEDEAD
[03:11] ---
Why!?
[03:12] ---
Why did you rip the door off
its hinges to come in, Mash!?
[03:15] ---
I couldn't remember
if I was supposed to push or pull.
[03:17] ---
How many years have you lived here!?
[03:20] ---
So I just kind of forced—
[03:21] ---
And you ended up breaking it!
[03:24] ---
Sorry, Pops. I'll fix it.
[03:28] ---
Oh, well... If you're repenting, then...
[03:31] ---
He's always so amenable
after each screwup.
[03:35] ---
RRRAAWR
[03:37] ---
Turn! Turn it! Turn it!
You need to turn it!
[03:39] ---
- Weird. It won't fit back in.
- That's the wrong position!
[03:43] ---
Huh? What'd you say?
[03:44] ---
Quit with the pounding, would you!?
[03:46] ---
Spit on the foundling?
[03:47] ---
No!
[03:52] ---
Sorry, Pops.
[03:54] ---
I'll fix it.
[03:55] ---
W-Well... Yeah, um...
[03:59] ---
Mash, did you finish
today's training routine?
[04:03] ---
Of course.
[04:06] ---
Hey, Pops.
[04:08] ---
I've been meaning to ask...
[04:09] ---
Why are all of my workouts physical?
[04:12] ---
Because you...
[04:14] ---
You're not like ordinary people.
[04:17] ---
You can't use magic at all
because you're different.
[04:21] ---
So the least I can do is...
[04:24] ---
Never mind. A story for another time.
[04:27] ---
Anyway, I'm heading out for a bit.
[04:30] ---
I'm trusting you to housesit.
[04:32] ---
- Okay.
- Don't break the door.
[04:35] ---
Don’t worry,
I learned how to fix it.
[04:37] ---
Learn how to open and close
the door instead!
[04:40] ---
Push in, or pull out...
[04:41] ---
Pull out! Pull out to open the door!
[04:44] ---
Anyways, I'm heading out.
[04:47] ---
I've told you countless times before,
[04:49] ---
but while I'm out, you must never
venture into the city.
[04:53] ---
Yeah, I won't.
[04:55] ---
Right. Mash, you’re such a good,
amenable son.
[04:59] ---
Now, I'll be on my way.
[05:01] ---
Be safe.
SIGN GOBLIN
CREAM PUFF
SPECIAL MENU
TODAY ONLY
[05:12] ---
Sorry, Pops.
[05:14] ---
But I can't ignore
the call of an empty stomach.
[05:26] ---
Magic.
[05:28] ---
Magic.
[05:30] ---
Magic.
[05:33] ---
They're still just doing stuff
you can do with your hands.
[05:43] ---
Seven limited cream puffs, please.
[05:45] ---
Sure thing.
[05:49] ---
Oops. I got too excited
and couldn't hold back.
[05:53] ---
But these don't usually bend
just by squeezing your hand.
[05:57] ---
Sorry. Let me fix them.
[06:00] ---
Did you say, "fix"?
[06:03] ---
This should work.
[06:05] ---
Huh? Hold on...
[06:09] ---
Freaky? Huh? No, wait... Um...
[06:14] ---
Here. Thanks for waiting.
[06:16] ---
Thank you very much.
[06:21] ---
Hey, did you see it?
[06:22] ---
I don't see it anywhere on his face.
[06:24] ---
- No way.
- You're right. Nothing.
[06:25] ---
Unbelievable.
[06:27] ---
Sir, are you actually a...
[06:31] ---
No, never mind.
Thanks for your patronage.
[06:35] ---
This year's "Divine Visionary"
has been determined.
[06:39] ---
The one chosen as "Divine Visionary" is Rayne Ames,
a second-year at Easton Magic Academy,
[06:44] ---
a prestigious school in the Magic Realm.
[06:47] ---
This title is awarded
[06:48] ---
to the student demonstrating the highest degree
of excellence over the school year.
[06:52] ---
In addition to promotion to nobility,
[06:54] ---
Yeah, yeah.
Must feel good with all that talent.
[06:54] ---
recipients are gifted a grant
of one billion lond and are further awarded
[06:57] ---
provisional employment at the Bureau of Magic,
the highest legal organization.
[07:00] ---
Then you have me here,
living a dull life in a dull place.
[07:01] ---
He is expected to contribute greatly
for the prosperity of this country.
[07:07] ---
P-Please forgive me.
I only stole a little something.
[07:13] ---
Huh? Are you kidding me?
[07:17] ---
You gave me more work
with your petty crime.
[07:21] ---
I gotta make you regret it
so you’ll never trouble me again.
[07:27] ---
S-Stop it! Please!
[07:34] ---
What is it? I'm busy.
[07:37] ---
What? There's an unmarked brat
in the city?
[07:42] ---
Wonder what everyone
was all riled up about back there.
[07:46] ---
While I'm out, you must never
venture out into the city.
[07:51] ---
Sorry, Pops.
[07:53] ---
But it was worth coming here.
[07:56] ---
I got to eat Goblin Cream Puffs.
[08:00] ---
Yummy, yummy, yum...
[08:06] ---
Oh, sorry.
[08:07] ---
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
[08:08] ---
What do you think you’re doing?
I'm workin' over here!
SIGN VODKA
ABV 90%
[08:12] ---
I'm a proud member of the magic police,
protecting ordinary folks like you!
[08:17] ---
And do I get any thanks? No!
[08:20] ---
The only thing I get is bottom-barrel pay!
[08:22] ---
Wanna have me
take out my stress on ya?
[08:28] ---
Would you like a cream puff?
I somehow feel sorry for you.
[08:31] ---
He's pitying me!
[08:33] ---
And it's half eaten!
[08:36] ---
Why would you give me
a half-eaten cream puff?
[08:39] ---
Ya aimin' for an indirect kiss or something?
Ya love me?
[08:42] ---
Are ya pickin' a fight?
[08:44] ---
That's basically pickin'
a fight with this country!
[08:46] ---
And whatcha gonna do
about my uniform? Huh?
[08:53] ---
What?
[08:57] ---
I'm sorry. I will wash
and return these clothes to you.
[09:01] ---
Now it ain't clothes!
Not as of this moment! Thanks to you!
[09:05] ---
What exactly did ya do, huh?
[09:07] ---
What's the matter, Terry?
[09:09] ---
Brad, this kid...
[09:11] ---
Don't make a riot over nothing.
[09:14] ---
More like, why the hell are you naked?
SIGN BRAD COLEMAN
[09:20] ---
Well, that's because this kid...
[09:23] ---
Must be him.
SIGN NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM
[09:24] ---
The unmarked brat from that report.
[09:28] ---
Wait.
SIGN NOM NOM NOM NOM NOM
[09:29] ---
Would anyone be eating cream puffs
in this kind of situation?
[09:34] ---
Hey, you over there.
[09:37] ---
Please excuse my son!
[09:47] ---
This will be a bit of a hassle,
[09:50] ---
but this may be my chance
for a promotion.
[09:56] ---
After them!
[10:07] ---
You idiot!
[10:08] ---
How may times have I told you?
Don't go to the city on your own!
[10:12] ---
I'm really sorry. I'll never go again.
[10:17] ---
He's really broken up about it.
It's clear he regrets his actions.
[10:21] ---
I can't stay mad at him.
[10:24] ---
Well, if that's the case, yeah.
[10:28] ---
But as punishment, you'll repeat
this morning's training routine.
[10:32] ---
Okay. And these cream puffs
are for you.
[10:36] ---
Oh, thank you.
[10:44] ---
Here.
[10:45] ---
Thanks, Pops.
[10:49] ---
He's such a good boy.
[10:51] ---
I thought a teenage son
would be really passionate,
[10:53] ---
rife with arguments
and rebellious streaks,
[10:56] ---
as you deepen your bonds
with each other.
[10:59] ---
But he's so amenable,
though a bit informal.
[11:05] ---
Well, I guess he's at an age
where he wants to get out.
[11:09] ---
We've lived here in hiding until now,
away from the city in this forest, for his sake.
[11:15] ---
But now the magic police
have caught wind of him.
[11:21] ---
I must act quickly.
[11:29] ---
What is that?
[11:42] ---
Hey, old geezer.
[11:44] ---
Where's the brat I saw earlier?
[11:48] ---
This is bad.
[12:03] ---
Five minutes is all I need
when I put my mind to it.
[12:06] ---
Time to head home and eat cream puffs.
[12:10] ---
"Crea" a puff, a creamy puff.
[12:14] ---
"Mp" a creamy, creamy puff.
[12:18] ---
"uff" a puff, a creamy puff.
[12:22] ---
Was I supposed to push or pull?
[12:25] ---
Guess it doesn't matter.
[12:27] ---
You knew and that's why
you hid that brat, right?
[12:31] ---
You know why magic has flourished
since the dawn of recorded history?
[12:37] ---
It's because we aggressively rid ourselves
of inferior blood unable to use magic.
[12:43] ---
It's a necessary sacrifice
for the world to go round.
[12:46] ---
Simply put, those who can't use magic
have no privileges.
[12:52] ---
Privilege to live, that is.
[12:55] ---
Or should I say,
they aren't supposed to live at all?
[12:59] ---
Spill it. Where’s the brat?
[13:02] ---
I-I have no idea
what you're talking about.
[13:09] ---
Sheltering the unmarked
is a serious offense, old man.
[13:14] ---
Hurry up and hand over the brat.
[13:19] ---
I refuse!
[13:23] ---
Fess up.
[13:24] ---
If you play nice and give us the brat,
I'll have my bosses spare you.
[13:30] ---
I won’t.
[13:31] ---
Never. I will never tell him.
[13:35] ---
Why can't you do something so simple!?
[13:38] ---
I'm sorry.
[13:39] ---
Your magic is weak.
You can't do anything properly!
[13:42] ---
Our bloodline has no need
for failures like you!
[13:47] ---
I'm sorry.
[13:49] ---
Hey! You can't even do something
as simple as this?
[13:52] ---
You're useless!
[13:53] ---
I-I apologize.
[13:55] ---
There are plenty of others
who can replace you!
[13:56] ---
I have always been a failure of a human.
[13:56] ---
I apologize.
[13:58] ---
- You failed again!
- I’m really sorry!
[14:00] ---
I kept failing
even after I became an adult.
[14:03] ---
You messed up again!
[14:05] ---
You're fired!
[14:06] ---
How can you keep living like that?
[14:09] ---
I'd already be dead
from embarrassment.
[14:19] ---
Completely unwanted.
[14:22] ---
I thought that's how my life would end.
[14:30] ---
If that's the case, then I should just...
[14:42] ---
This baby...
[14:44] ---
has no mark.
[14:47] ---
You were abandoned
because you were unmarked.
[14:52] ---
You're just like me.
[15:00] ---
In this moment, for the first time
in my life, I felt like someone needed me.
[15:07] ---
I swore on that day...
[15:11] ---
Even if we're not related by blood,
even if the entire world denied his existence,
[15:18] ---
I would always be a father to that boy!
[15:22] ---
Tell us where he is already, old man.
[15:25] ---
Run, Mash!
[15:27] ---
You old geezer!
[15:27] ---
You have to get away right now, Mash!
[15:29] ---
Hey! This means
he's still close by! Find him!
[15:32] ---
Yessir!
[15:34] ---
Run for it, Mash!
[15:35] ---
Damn you, old geezer!
[15:39] ---
- L-Let go of me!
- Run! Run!
[15:40] ---
Please let my words reach him.
[15:41] ---
Pipe it down, old geezer!
[15:44] ---
All that matters
is that you're safe! Please!
[15:46] ---
- Old man, hurry up and...
- Run away!
[15:49] ---
You are my one and only...
[15:53] ---
Run! Run away, Mash!
[15:56] ---
That's enough, old man.
[15:59] ---
I'll make you regret this.
[16:26] ---
Hey you! You had some nerve
earlier today when...
[16:31] ---
My second shirt today...
SIGN SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP SLAP
[16:40] ---
Why...
[16:41] ---
Why didn't you run, Mash?
[16:45] ---
Because we're family.
[16:47] ---
You're all I've got.
[16:50] ---
Sorry for being selfish, Pops.
[16:53] ---
But since I'm here...
[16:57] ---
I might as well send you guys to hell.
[17:03] ---
What a joke.
[17:05] ---
You can't even use magic.
How are you going to take me down?
[17:09] ---
What an idiot. Brad used to be
on the Bureau of Magic's Security Force.
[17:14] ---
Regular mages around here
don't hold a candle to him.
[17:18] ---
And a magic-less chump
wants to take him on?
[17:23] ---
He won't stand a chance!
[17:24] ---
It'll be over in three seconds.
[17:30] ---
That’s the spell that drove away a dragon
in his Bureau of Magic's Security Force days!
[17:35] ---
I didn't think I would get to see it here!
[17:40] ---
Eat this.
[17:42] ---
Nalcom Pas!
[17:44] ---
Mash!
[17:59] ---
Mash!
[18:01] ---
Huh? Did he...
[18:03] ---
My Nalcom Pas... He just...
[18:06] ---
He slapped it down? Like, “paff”?
[18:09] ---
Can magic be paff'ed just like that?
[18:12] ---
I drove a dragon away
with that spell, you know?
[18:15] ---
What? There's no way.
[18:20] ---
Not bad, brat!
[18:22] ---
But how about this?
[18:25] ---
That magical energy output!
[18:26] ---
Is he trying to destroy
this entire area?
[18:29] ---
Hold on, Brad!
[18:30] ---
You shouldn't do that!
[18:32] ---
Nalcom Pas Diagorus!
[18:43] ---
Damn it!
[18:47] ---
This brat...
[18:48] ---
He's killing the momentum
with his knees!
[18:50] ---
What a soft touch!
[18:52] ---
All right, then how about this?
[18:56] ---
And now he's juggling!
[19:00] ---
Look at those dribbling moves!
[19:03] ---
This brat is totally
making a fool of me.
[19:09] ---
Pops, I'm gonna borrow your wand.
[19:11] ---
What’s going on?
[19:13] ---
He can use magic after all?
[19:17] ---
Doesn't matter.
[19:19] ---
Ordinary magic
won't even reach me anyway...
[19:43] ---
I've never seen anyone
use a magic wand like that before.
[19:50] ---
Threaten my family again...
[19:53] ---
and I'll kill you.
SIGN TREMBLE TREMBLE
[19:54] ---
His training was only meant
to teach him self-defense.
[19:58] ---
How is this physically possible?
[20:00] ---
Either way, we're done for.
[20:03] ---
Even if we fend them off
for now, in due time...
[20:08] ---
Interesting.
[20:10] ---
Let's make a deal, Mushroom Head.
[20:12] ---
Do what I ask, and I'll let you
and the old geezer slide.
[20:16] ---
A deal?
[20:18] ---
Once a year in this country,
[20:20] ---
one exceptional student
is revered as one of God's chosen.
[20:24] ---
It's called the "Divine Visionary."
[20:27] ---
Enroll in a magic school
and be chosen as one.
[20:31] ---
Simply put, if you're selected,
it means God has accepted you.
[20:36] ---
Which means, society will accept you.
[20:39] ---
I just want the fortune and prestige
that comes with it.
[20:43] ---
I'll back you up, of course.
[20:44] ---
Don't listen to him, Mash!
[20:46] ---
Those are the words of someone
who was an enemy until moments ago!
[20:50] ---
It's up to you
if you want to be skeptical or not.
[20:53] ---
But if you refuse, we’ll hunt you down
for the rest of your life.
[20:58] ---
If I'm after you,
the whole country will be, too.
[21:01] ---
You'll be okay because you're tough.
But what about the old man?
[21:06] ---
A life where you can never feel at ease,
and unable to set foot in a city.
[21:11] ---
Well, the choice is yours.
[21:14] ---
Spend the rest of your life
being hunted down,
[21:16] ---
or brace yourself to die
and try turning the tables?
[21:24] ---
- You got a deal.
- Are you sane? It's a magic school!
[21:27] ---
I'll be fine, Pops. My motivation
is stronger than anyone else.
[21:31] ---
This isn't about motivation!
[21:34] ---
Besides...
[21:35] ---
I want us to be able
to live in peace again.
[21:38] ---
You're such a good boy.
[21:40] ---
My son!
SIGN MY SON
[21:43] ---
Living in peace with Pops.
[21:47] ---
If it's a world that won't allow
something as natural as that...
[21:57] ---
Then I've got no choice but to crush it.
[22:01] ---
With my fist.
SIGN NEXT EPISODE
MASH BURNEDEAD AND THE MYSTERIOUS MAZE
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