E6 - Attack! Battle of the Home Visits

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:15] Yoshino
    Aki-sama's late.
[00:18] Neko
    It's quite hot today, isn't it?
[00:34] Neko
    Do you happen to know
    where Masamune-sama is?
[00:38] Yoshino
    Why ask me?
[00:40] Neko
    I surmised you were the first
    person whom I should ask.
[00:44] Yoshino
    I don't know.
[00:46] Neko
    Is that so?
[00:48] Yoshino
    Yes.
[00:49] Neko
    Oh, I see.
SIGN    #6: "Attack! Battle of the Home Visits"
[02:42] Aki
    Well, for example...
[02:44] Aki
    You could kiss me.
[02:47] Masamune
    Kiss...
[02:49] Masamune
    To osculate...
[02:53] Masamune
    A smooch...
[03:04] Aki
    What? If you actually liked me,
    you could at least do that.
[03:09] Masamune
    W-Well, um...
[03:11] Masamune
    D-Don't be ridiculous!
[03:13] Masamune
    A k-k-k-k-k-kiss was, like, the last of
    the last of the "Dead or Love" Plan.
[03:17] Masamune
    I was planning it as the grand finale!
[03:27] (Flashback) Aki
    Makabe...
[03:30] (Flashback) Aki
    I love you.
[03:37] (Flashback) Masamune
    But I refuse!
[03:38] Masamune
    Mission complete!
[03:40] Masamune
    That's the last scene.
[03:44] Masamune
    And so, for this to happen at
    such a random, unpopular point,
[03:47] Masamune
    and right in the middle of my plan,
    was completely unaccounted for!
[03:53] Aki
    See? I knew it.
[03:55] Aki
    I don't have time for this.
[03:57] Masamune
    Wait!
[04:04] Masamune
    What are you doing,
    grabbing onto her like that?!
[04:07] Masamune
    You just dove right into the main event!
[04:09] Masamune
    It's insane! This is insane!
[04:12] Masamune
    But I can't run away from
    this. What should I...
[04:18] Masamune
    I know. This is a ham!
[04:20] Masamune
    She's a ham shaped like a person!
[04:22] Masamune
    If I think of it as biting into a tasty
    ham I got as a midsummer gift...
[04:28] Aki
    H-Hey!
[04:32] Aki
    No! Don't!
[04:43] Masamune
    What'd you do that for?!
[04:45] Aki
    B-But...
[04:46] Masamune
    Don't "but" me!
[04:49] Masamune
    There's no use in acting like the
    victim here, you stupid ham!
[04:52] Tae
    Oh, Masamune-kun?
[05:00] Masamune
    Huh? Class Rep?
[05:02] Tae
    What are you doing there?
[05:04] Masamune
    One of the teachers made us
    clean the pool as punishment,
[05:07] Masamune
    and the pool seemed so nice and cool,
    we couldn't help but splash right in.
[05:11] Tae
    What the heck?
[05:13] Girl
    Still, you probably shouldn't
    dive in with your clothes on.
[05:16] Masamune
    L-Looks like I managed to
    dodge that bullet for now...
[05:20] Masamune
    What are you doing here, Class Rep?
[05:22] Tae
    Me? I have practice.
[05:26] Masamune
    So she's in the swim club, too.
[05:28] Masamune
    That's why she's got such
    a nice cardio body.
[05:31] Tae
    Well, good luck with the cleaning.
[05:33] Masamune
    Th-Thanks...
[05:39] Masamune
    What the hell? You're trying to escape?
[05:42] Aki
    Well...
[05:43] Aki
    I guess I'll just accept the fact
    that you love me so much,
[05:47] Aki
    you have no idea what to do with yourself.
[05:52] Aki
    And that brings up the question: "So what?"
[06:02] Masamune
    You can't be serious!
    Someone fry that ham to a crisp!
[06:13] Masamune
    What the hell is her problem?
    She's the one who told me to do it.
[06:20] Masamune
    I actually tried to kiss her.
[06:26] Neko
    There you are, Masamune-sama.
[06:29] Masamune
    Fujinomiya-san?!
[06:31] Neko
    I've been looking for you.
[06:39] Masamune
    I don't think I have the energy
    to hang out right now...
[06:43] Neko
    My, you must be tired
    from that grueling task.
[06:58] Neko
    You can have this, if you like.
[07:01] Masamune
    Hot tea? At this time of year?
[07:08] Masamune
    It's salty.
[07:13] Neko
    I hear it's best to never let your body
    get a chill, even in the summer.
[07:18] Neko
    I also hear you need sodium and
    citric acid to fight dehydration.
[07:21] Neko
    So I thought the best solution would be
    roasted green tea with pickled plum in it.
[07:28] Masamune
    Huh...
[07:29] Masamune
    Well, that makes sense.
[07:32] Masamune
    I prefer this over some
    disgustingly sweet juice.
[07:36] Neko
    The other things you lack are
    essential vitamins and magnesium.
[07:39] Neko
    Beer yeast and propolis.
SIGN    Multivitamin
SIGN    Magnesium
[07:41] Neko
    This company's propolis has
    a patented method for how
[07:45] Neko
    it's absorbed into your body,
    making it more effective.
[07:48] Neko
    Then there's the magnesium and...
[07:52] Neko
    I-I'm terribly sorry! I've been presumptuous.
[08:00] Masamune
    I can't say that I'm very fond
    of turning to medicines first.
[08:04] Masamune
    Exercise and diet are more important.
[08:06] Masamune
    I think it's fine to use medicines
    as an aid after that, but...
[08:10] Neko
    Of course, I do believe that's ideal.
[08:15] Masamune
    She's pretty cute when she's
    pouting like that, too.
[08:20] Masamune
    Fujinomiya-san, can I ask you something?
[08:22] Neko
    Yes?
[08:25] Masamune
    What do you like about me?
[08:30] Masamune
    I'm definitely a guy who can
    turn even a stumble into profit!
[08:34] Masamune
    This is the super difficult question Adagaki
    Aki posed to me that I couldn't answer.
[08:39] (Flashback) Aki
    What is there to like about me?
[08:42] Masamune
    I'll immediately shoot down any superficial
    answers like "your face" or "everything!"
[08:46] Masamune
    And of course, since you don't know me,
[08:50] Masamune
    you can't give a real answer
    about my character.
[08:53] Masamune
    It's the best question to ask, since either
    answer allows me to easily shoot her down!
[08:57] Masamune
    So, how are you going to answer?
[09:02] Neko
    I like how you're so modest that you
    don't even realize your own charms.
[09:10] Masamune
    White...
[09:13] Masamune
    Whitening!
[09:25] Masamune
    I-I see.
[09:28] Neko
    You should be a little more confident,
[09:33] Neko
    because you're a very lovely
    person, Masamune-sama.
[09:45] Masamune
    That woman is a tougher than I thought.
[09:49] Masamune
    I get it! I think what I'm lacking is the
    ability to be unreasonably audacious.
[09:57] Masamune
    Oh, my pants are almost dry.
[10:05] Yoshino
    That commando girl is definitely dangerous.
    I need to cut her down from the roots.
[10:23] Yoshino
    Where is she going off to on her own?
[10:26] Yoshino
    This is...
[10:29] Yoshino
    What's that woman thinking?
[10:42] Shidou
    Did you need something from Neko-sama?
[10:48] Yoshino
    I-I have no idea what you're talking about.
[10:51] Neko
    Shidou. She's an acquaintance of mine.
[10:55] Neko
    Koiwai Yoshino-san.
[10:59] Neko
    You work as Adagaki-sama's
    attendant, don't you?
[11:07] Yoshino
    I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I don't know.
[11:11] Neko
    You can stop with the charade.
[11:15] Neko
    I know it's your job, but it must be difficult.
[11:20] Yoshino
    Why are you so concerned
    with Makabe Masamune?
[11:23] Neko
    Because he saved me in the past.
[11:26] Yoshino
    You're lying. I heard
    everything from Pig's Foot.
[11:36] Kinue
    May I help you two?
[11:40] Masamune
    The way I'm so modest that I don't
    even realize my own charms, huh...
[11:44] Masamune
    I'll use that line the next
    time I see Adagaki Aki.
[11:47] Masamune
    But if I keep admiring her like this,
    I'm going to keep falling for her.
[11:54] Masamune
    I'm home.
[11:54] Kinue
    Right. First, pick up the shrimp...
[11:56] Neko
    Like this?
[11:56] Masamune
    What's all the ruckus?
[11:57] Neko
    Yes, that's right!
[11:58] Kinue
    Yes, keep that up.
[12:00] Kinue
    Very good! Next, we have the eggs.
[12:05] Kinue
    Oh, Maa-kun. Welcome home.
[12:09] Neko
    Welcome home, Masamune-sama.
[12:13] Masamune
    What the hell are you two doing here?!
[12:15] Neko
    I tried making fried shrimp
    for the first time in my life.
[12:18] Neko
    I hope it's to your liking.
[12:23] Masamune
    O-Oh... I get it.
[12:24] Masamune
    This isn't my house.
[12:26] Kinue
    It's almost ready, so nibble on
    some cookies while you wait.
[12:27] Masamune
    But the loli hag is here...
[12:30] Masamune
    Wait! This is my house!
[12:33] Masamune
    M-Master!
[12:40] Yoshino
    My hands are all sticky.
[12:42] Masamune
    That doesn't matter right now!
    What the heck is going on?
[12:48] (Flashback) Kinue
    May I help you two?
[12:55] (Flashback) Kinue
    Those uniforms! You must
    go to Maa-kun's school.
[12:58] (Flashback) Kinue
    Were you looking for Maa-kun?
    Are you Maa-kun's fans?
[13:02] (Flashback) Kinue
    Maa-kun is so popular!
[13:05] (Flashback) Kinue
    Maa-kun isn't home yet. Come on in.
[13:08] (Flashback) Kinue
    I was planning to make fried shrimp tonight.
[13:10] (Flashback) Yoshino
    Er, no, I'm okay.
[13:12] (Flashback) Kinue
    E-B-I! Otherwise known as shrimp!
[13:14] (Flashback) Yoshino
    Shrimp!
[13:15] (Flashback) Kinue
    You, too! Repeat after me!
[13:19] (Flashback) Shidou
    No, I'm afraid I have work to do.
[13:22] Masamune
    I-I'm so sorry that my
    mom can't take a hint.
[13:25] Yoshino
    It was super awkward.
[13:27] Masamune
    Anyway, I need you guys to leave,
[13:31] Masamune
    before you see anything dangerous.
[13:37] Masamune
    Was there anything else?
[13:39] Yoshino
    By "dangerous," do you mean everything here?
[13:43] Masamune
    Huh? What do you mean?
[13:45] Yoshino
    This room that makes it
    obvious that you have
[13:47] Yoshino
    nothing but weight training on your mind.
[13:49] Masamune
    S-Stop looking around so much!
[13:51] Masamune
    And call it the "gym machine of perfection"!
[13:54] Masamune
    Listen up. You can't lose a single day
    on the road to becoming a hot guy.
[13:57] Masamune
    If you let the smallest fat go, it'll
    become an even bigger visceral fat.
[14:01] Masamune
    A single drop of oil is the
    beginning of a huge fatty.
[14:04] Neko
    My, what a lovely room.
[14:10] Neko
    This is all rather ideal for rehabilitation.
[14:18] Neko
    Masamune-sama?
[14:22] Neko
    It's embarrassing to do that here.
[14:25] Masamune
    I won't be fooled, no matter
    what weird things you say!
[14:29] Masamune
    Did you need something?
[14:32] Neko
    Oh, yes. The shrimp is ready.
    Chinatsu-sama also just came home,
[14:37] Neko
    so Kinue-sama is waiting for you.
SIGN    High in Calories
SIGN    High in Calories
SIGN    High in Calories
[14:45] Masamune
    Such high calories again...
[14:47] Chinatsu
    Man, I was so surprised.
[14:49] Chinatsu
    I can't believe you actually have friends
    willing to come over, Onii-chan.
[14:53] Neko
    Oh, why is that?
[14:56] Neko
    Masamune-sama is quite popular.
[14:59] Chinatsu
    Well, Onii-chan's scared of
    people finding out who—
[15:03] Chinatsu
    Is this the stupid mouth
    that's blabbing too much?!
[15:06] Neko
    "Who"? You mean Masamune-sama?
[15:09] Chinatsu
    Oh, yeah. I mean, he thinks
    he's hot stuff now, but—
[15:13] Masamune
    And that's enough idle chatter! Let's eat!
[15:17] Chinatsu
    Why are you sitting here? There's no room.
[15:20] Kinue
    Did everyone take a seat?
[15:22] Kinue
    All right, let's eat.
[15:27] Masamune
    This breading is pretty much all fat.
[15:39] Kinue
    Jeez!
[15:40] Kinue
    Maa-kun, Neko-chan! Don't do that!
[15:42] Kinue
    You're supposed to enjoy your meals!
[15:45] Both
    Enjoy?
[15:47] Masamune
    But calories are a problem.
[15:48] Neko
    Nutrients are important.
[15:53] Chinatsu
    You two are so much alike.
[15:57] Masamune
    Hey, I'm not gonna let that slide!
[15:59] Chinatsu
    Why?
[16:01] Masamune
    "Why," nothing! How are we alike at all?
[16:02] Kinue
    Yoshino-chan, there's more if you'd like.
[16:04] Yoshino
    Okay.
[16:05] Chinatsu
    Hey, let's set off some fireworks after we eat.
[16:08] Masamune
    Hey! Stop deciding for everyone else!
[16:10] Masamune
    They're both really busy, you know.
[16:12] Neko
    My! Fireworks! How lovely. I would love to!
[16:16] Chinatsu
    What about you, Yoshino-san?
[16:18] Yoshino
    Okay.
[16:19] Chinatsu
    Yay!
[16:20] Masamune
    This little...
[16:25] Chinatsu
    It's fireworks time!
[16:28] Masamune
    Did you really have to
    change into a yukata?
[16:37] Chinatsu
    Fireworks!
[16:39] Masamune
    You're gonna bother the neighbors.
[16:41] Chinatsu
    Fujinomiya-san, hurry! Come here!
[16:44] Masamune
    Well, good job taking her out
    to the yard, my little sister.
[16:49] Masamune
    It's safer than me being inside
    this house with that woman.
[16:54] Yoshino
    Your little sister is pretty
    different from you.
[17:01] Masamune
    She's way too hyper.
[17:04] Masamune
    Sorry to make you go through with all this.
[17:07] Yoshino
    It's fine. I'm just not very fond of fireworks.
[17:10] Masamune
    Huh? Why not?
[17:12] Yoshino
    A long time ago,
[17:13] Yoshino
    Aki-sama thought up an experiment
[17:13] (Flashback) Aki
    Ten, nine, eight, seven, six,
    five, four, three, two, one...
[17:16] Yoshino
    to find out how many rocket fireworks it
    would take to fly someone to the moon,
[17:20] Yoshino
    and I was the guinea pig...
[17:23] Yoshino
    My vision went white and
    I couldn't hear anymore.
[17:27] Masamune
    Enough! That's enough, Master!
[17:28] Masamune
    You don't have to say it!
[17:30] Masamune
    How sadistic can that Cruel Princess be?!
[17:35] Yoshino
    These snake fireworks are so calming.
[17:37] Masamune
    I think I'll just leave her be.
[17:41] Neko
    Chinatsu-sama, your obi is loose.
[17:44] Chinatsu
    Huh?
[17:47] Chinatsu
    Th-Thanks.
[17:51] Masamune
    What are you all red for?
[17:56] Masamune
    A Chinese peony when she stands,
    and a tree peony when she sits, was it?
[18:05] Chinatsu
    Thanks.
[18:08] Neko
    Chinatsu-sama is very cute.
[18:12] Masamune
    Is she? I don't think so.
[18:15] Neko
    I've never experienced
    such a delightful time.
[18:18] Neko
    I'm not sure how I should be reacting.
[18:22] Masamune
    Everyone's set off fireworks before.
[18:28] Neko
    It's so beautiful.
[18:32] Kinue
    Everyone, I sliced some watermelon.
[18:34] Masamune
    More food?!
[18:36] Chinatsu
    Watermelon!
[18:38] Chinatsu
    Fujinomiya-san, Koiwai-san,
    let's have a contest!
[18:41] Neko
    A contest?
[18:42] Yoshino
    For what?
[18:43] Chinatsu
    To see who can spit the
    seeds the farthest, duh!
[18:45] Kinue
    I'm not going to lose.
[18:47] Masamune
    Are they all grade-schoolers?
[19:00] Masamune
    If you weren't such a liar,
[19:04] Masamune
    we might have been able to have
    a different kind of relationship.
[19:16] Masamune
    If I didn't have this vendetta
    against Adagaki Aki,
[19:20] Masamune
    would I have felt something else?
[19:29] Masamune
    Fujinomiya-san, are you done changing?
[19:32] Masamune
    Your ride is here.
[19:33] Neko
    I'll be right there.
[19:46] Masamune
    She's finally going home.
    That was so nerve-wracking.
[19:49] Neko
    Masamune-sama.
[19:51] Neko
    Won't you see me to my house?
[19:54] Masamune
    Oh, come on. You have
    someone waiting for you.
[20:00] Neko
    Today was such a fun day.
    I regret that it's over.
[20:04] Masamune
    Well, that's nice.
[20:06] Masamune
    Please never come over again.
[20:08] Neko
    Farewell.
[20:14] Masamune
    What about you, Master?
    Want me to walk you home?
[20:18] Yoshino
    I live at Aki-sama's place.
[20:20] Masamune
    R-Right...
[20:22] Masamune
    I don't want her getting the wrong idea again.
[20:26] Masmune
    Then I'll just walk you to a main
    road where you can get a taxi.
[20:33] Yoshino
    Pig's Foot.
[20:38] Yoshino
    Don't get caught up in her pace.
[20:41] Masamune
    Wh-What are you talking about?
    That's not happening.
[20:44] Yoshino
    No matter what.
[20:47] Chinatsu
    Man, that was so much fun!
[20:49] Chinatsu
    I feel a little relieved now. I thought
    Onii-chan would be alone forever.
[20:54] Kinue
    Yeah.
[20:57] Kinue
    To think we'd meet again here...
[21:00] Kinue
    Fujinomiya-san.
[21:03] Shidou
    I'm very sorry that I could
    not accompany you, milady.
[21:07] Neko
    It's quite all right. I was
    able to produce some results.
[21:12] Neko
    We're alike...
[21:15] Neko
    She might be right.
[22:53] Masamune
    It's the way you're so modest that you
    don't even realize your own charms.
[23:01] Masamune
    Huh?
[23:03] Masamune
    I just told you how I feel.
[23:07] Aki
    Did you think saying that would
    stir the slightest feelings in me?
[23:11] Aki
    Such a cheap line. I'm not
    you, for crying out loud.
[23:16] Aki
    Just so you know, I know exactly
    what my potential is.
[23:20] Aki
    And in your case, it's not that
    you're too modest to realize it.
[23:25] Aki
    It's just that you're a moron.
[23:32] Masamune
    Master...
[23:36] Yoshino
    You just stole her line? Are you stupid?