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1 - The Demon and the Double D's

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:13] ---
    "Sunabouzu - Desert Punk"
[00:17] ---
    I am the one!
[00:20] ---
    Push on ahead as you like, yeah
[00:24] ---
    Oh, listen closely to me
[00:28] ---
    and speak the name
    of the desert god

[00:32] ---
    Clench your teeth
[00:36] ---
    When your heart starts
    to tremble with heat...

[00:40] ---
    Stop it! It'll only
    bring destruction

[00:46] ---
    Let's do it, oh, angel
[00:50] ---
    Now is the time to
    stand up and be strong

[00:55] ---
    A sad history, a
    hidden big story

[00:59] ---
    That's the mystery
[01:02] ---
    There's nothing certain
    about what tomorrow holds

[01:10] ---
    so living through this moment
[01:15] ---
    is my mission alone
[01:39] ---
    The Great Kanto Desert.
[01:42] ---
    The temperature exceeds 50
    degrees Celsius in the afternoon,
[01:46] ---
    and plummets below freezing at night.
[01:51] ---
    Here lie the ruins of a
    civilization whose transgressions
[01:53] ---
    brought about its downfall centuries prior.
[01:57] ---
    One could even say that they are
    grave-posts for those who died here.
[02:07] ---
    As for their surviving descendants...
[02:22] ---
    ...they clearly haven't
    learned a damn thing.
[02:27] ---
    "Ghost and Boobies"
[02:34] ---
    Honey...!
[02:35] ---
    Hurry up! We're dead meat if they catch us!
[02:38] ---
    Are you all right, Namiko?!
[02:40] ---
    Mommy... I'm hungry...!
[02:44] ---
    This isn't the time for that...!
[02:52] ---
    Honey...!
[02:53] ---
    Whoa!
[02:55] ---
    You ain't goin' nowhere!
[02:58] ---
    No! Stop!
[03:01] ---
    Let Mommy go...!
[03:10] ---
    Namiko...!
[03:13] ---
    Ain't no escape now...!
[03:15] ---
    Leave everything ya got on the ground!
[03:18] ---
    Not like it matters, we're
    gonna rob your corpses anyway!
[03:27] ---
    Oh no! I'm going to be raped!
[03:35] ---
    Damn woman, gettin' our hopes up...!
[03:39] ---
    Who'd ever want you?!
[03:41] ---
    Damn you!
[03:45] ---
    Hey, you from the Kawazu Clan?
[03:57] ---
    What the...?
[03:58] ---
    You're a puny li'l runt...!
[04:01] ---
    You the guys who attacked
    the oasis transport trucks
[04:04] ---
    at Water Station ♪45 three days ago?
[04:17] ---
    And what if...
[04:18] ---
    ...we are?!
[04:20] ---
    What if we are?!
[04:21] ---
    What if we are?!
[04:23] ---
    I've been hired to retrieve
    someone's treasure from you.
[04:28] ---
    Just so ya know, if you're a
    government official then you're dead!
[04:33] ---
    And you're dead if you're a bounty hunter!
[04:35] ---
    Let's just say you're dead anyways!
[04:49] ---
    No government official would ever
    come somewhere this dangerous.
[04:53] ---
    And all bounty hunters do
    is bully weaker people.
[04:56] ---
    Though it's thanks to them
    that jobs come my way...
[05:03] ---
    If you tell me where your
    dumbass boss is, I'll let you go.
[05:13] ---
    Did I make you mad?
[05:15] ---
    What a pain...
[05:23] ---
    Think we wasted too much ammo?!
[05:26] ---
    Look up there!
[05:31] ---
    W-w-what?! He's flying!
[05:34] ---
    Is he a ghost?!
[05:35] ---
    Wait, a ghost...?!
[05:39] ---
    The "Ghost of the Desert"...?
[05:53] ---
    Huh...?
[06:00] ---
    What the hell did you do to us...?
[06:07] ---
    Tasteless, odorless, and colorless!
[06:09] ---
    Super instant paralysis spray!
    Works good, huh?
[06:16] ---
    That ain't fair...
[06:19] ---
    I'm known far and wide for
    always carrying out my jobs.
[06:23] ---
    I don't want to lose that reputation...
[06:26] ---
    ...so I'll do anything.
[06:29] ---
    Now tell me where your hideout is!
[06:31] ---
    --Take this! And this!
[06:31] ---
    --You're so mean!
[06:39] ---
    57, 58, 59, 60...
[06:43] ---
    Well, then.
[06:45] ---
    You sure were lucky to be
    saved for only 200,000 a head.
[06:50] ---
    See ya.
[06:54] ---
    Honey...!
[06:57] ---
    Forgive me for being so weak...!
[07:01] ---
    I can't say no to a ghost...!
[07:05] ---
    Honey...!
[07:13] ---
    Eh? Masami's group is missing?
[07:17] ---
    We can't get 'em on the radio, either...
[07:19] ---
    They were supposed to be
    in charge of West 33 today...
[07:28] ---
    They're probably off
    having "fun" elsewhere.
[07:31] ---
    Well, they can just forget about
    their after-dinner pudding!
[07:35] ---
    Yessir! I'll give them a talking to!
[07:38] ---
    No pudding, no pudding...!
[07:39] ---
    No pudding, no pudding...!
[07:41] ---
    I will eat their pudding.
[07:44] ---
    "Kawazu Clan Boss -
    Kawazu Makoto, Age 37"
[07:46] ---
    Pudding, pudding! My dear pudding!
[07:49] ---
    Yummy!
[07:54] ---
    Bad news!
[07:56] ---
    What's wrong?!
[07:57] ---
    There was a letter at the entrance...!
[07:59] ---
    It's a letter from the Sunabouzu!
[08:08] ---
    Sunabouzu?
[08:10] ---
    That handyman who's been
    crushing various clans lately
[08:14] ---
    with his strange "magic"?
[08:17] ---
    Sounds interesting. Read it.
[08:19] ---
    Yes, sir...!
[08:21] ---
    "Dear Loser Kawazu Boss..."
[08:24] ---
    "I've come for your head. Fight me!"
[08:27] ---
    "There's no point running,
    'cause I'm gonna kill your sorry ass."
[08:32] ---
    "I also took care of your
    three loser henchmen."
[08:34] ---
    "See you soon, Idiot Boss
    of the Moron Clan."
[08:40] ---
    Eep...
[08:43] ---
    Whoa, even after all that trash talk...
[08:47] ---
    ...he's not upset one bit...
[08:50] ---
    Talk about cool...
[08:52] ---
    That's our boss...!
[08:55] ---
    "P.S. Your mommy has an outie!"
[08:59] ---
    Mommy does not have an outie...!
[09:05] ---
    The boss is mad!
[09:07] ---
    His Hulkosis...!
[09:08] ---
    Run...!
[09:28] ---
    None of my business.
[09:35] ---
    Fine, whatever.
[09:38] ---
    Ok, now...!
[09:43] ---
    A babe!
[09:46] ---
    With boobs!
[09:50] ---
    Are you all right, Miss?! Allow me to--
[09:59] ---
    Aah!
[10:12] ---
    "Handy"
[10:16] ---
    I'm sorry. I thought you were a bandit...
[10:27] ---
    B-but what are you doing out here...?
[10:30] ---
    In those sexy, I mean, light clothes,
[10:34] ---
    you'll develop heatstroke and
    blisters in half a day...!
[10:39] ---
    Actually... I'm...!
[10:44] ---
    I'm...!
[10:49] ---
    Please save me!
[10:52] ---
    Save you? From what...?
[10:55] ---
    That awful, vicious Kawazu
    Clan forced me to go with them,
[11:00] ---
    but I just managed to escape...!
[11:03] ---
    Hey, there!
[11:05] ---
    Forced?!
[11:07] ---
    Their boss told me I was going to
    make pudding for the rest of my life
[11:11] ---
    in his mom's place...
[11:13] ---
    Isn't that just horrible?
[11:16] ---
    --Forced? To do what, exactly...?!
[11:17] ---
    --But I guess I'm just too cute, so...
[11:20] ---
    Please! You're my only hope!
[11:24] ---
    Don't cry, Milady.
[11:27] ---
    I, too, have some business
    with the Kawazu Clan.
[11:30] ---
    Once I'm done, I shall
    accompany you to an oasis.
[11:36] ---
    Come to think of it, they did
    say they lost some guards...
[11:40] ---
    Does that mean you're--
[11:42] ---
    Damn, I've been found out...
[11:49] ---
    What's wrong, Madam?!
[11:51] ---
    I suddenly feel weak
    now that I feel safe...
[11:57] ---
    This girl desperately
    needs me right now...!
[12:03] ---
    She completely depends on me!
[12:06] ---
    She can't live without me...!
[12:09] ---
    You're gonna pay, Kawazu Clan...!
[12:18] ---
    By the way, is the Kawazu
    hideout around here?
[12:23] ---
    Right over there.
[12:24] ---
    "Signpost"
[12:26] ---
    Whoa. Now that's obvious...
[12:30] ---
    Yes...
[12:41] ---
    There ain't anything here...
[12:45] ---
    That's the Sunabouzu?
[12:47] ---
    Pretty puny if you ask me...
[12:49] ---
    You idiot! Don't let your guard down!
    He's the Ghost of the Desert!
[12:55] ---
    What're you so scared about?
[12:57] ---
    I'll take him down with one shot...!
[13:00] ---
    Huh?! He's looking this way!
[13:02] ---
    You moron! Just shoot already!
[13:13] ---
    That ain't ordinary shotgun ammo!
[13:16] ---
    Them's grenades!
[13:19] ---
    These bums are 100 years
    too early to ambush me
[13:23] ---
    without any real equipment!
[13:30] ---
    Don't let him escape! Fire! Fire!
[13:38] ---
    Take this! And this! And this!
[13:43] ---
    Crap!
[13:45] ---
    Fire! Fire!
[13:52] ---
    Whew, I'm pooped...
[13:54] ---
    Now what? I used too much ammo...
[13:57] ---
    Oh well, I can just add it to the bill...!
[14:07] ---
    You guys're annoying! Eat this!
[14:10] ---
    There's only one of him! Get him!
[14:17] ---
    Crap... I better retreat for now...!
[14:22] ---
    The dumbass ran in there!
[14:25] ---
    Trap him like a rat!
[14:30] ---
    What's that...?!
[14:32] ---
    Crap!
[14:37] ---
    Morons!
[14:38] ---
    Pretty good!
[14:42] ---
    But not as good as the
    rumors say, Sunabouzu!
[14:46] ---
    You're one helluva moron to call
    us out here and fall into our trap!
[14:54] ---
    That's one ugly mug...!
[14:56] ---
    He must lead a tough life. Hulkosis, huh...
[15:01] ---
    Called you out here?!
[15:04] ---
    You the Kawazu Boss?
[15:06] ---
    Indeed!
[15:08] ---
    I came to get the treasure
    around your neck,
[15:11] ---
    but I've suddenly decided to
    crush the lot of you as well.
[15:15] ---
    Are you insane?! How do you expect
    to get outta this situation?!
[15:19] ---
    Just go ahead and try it!
[15:21] ---
    How dare you kill Masami and the others!
[15:24] ---
    Don't expect to die peacefully!
[15:27] ---
    That three-man squad? I didn't kill 'em.
[15:30] ---
    I tied 'em up and tossed
    'em in some building.
[15:36] ---
    Mommy does not have an outie!
[15:39] ---
    Huh?!
[15:40] ---
    Bastard! Trying to play dumb?!
[15:44] ---
    You can't lie after sending
    that letter, dumbass!
[15:47] ---
    Dumbass? I got no idea what
    you're talking about...!
[15:52] ---
    I've had enough of this...!
[15:57] ---
    A smokescreen!
[15:58] ---
    Kill him!
[16:09] ---
    Alright! That's enough.
    Bring his carcass here.
[16:15] ---
    Huh...?
[16:18] ---
    He ain't anywhere!
[16:20] ---
    Look harder!
[16:22] ---
    He got blasted to smithereens.
[16:28] ---
    Damn...!
[16:31] ---
    Look up there!
[16:34] ---
    The dude's flying!
[16:37] ---
    He is a ghost!
[16:40] ---
    There's more of him!
[16:41] ---
    Ghosts!
[16:42] ---
    There are no such things as ghosts!
[17:07] ---
    Blew him clean away!
[17:10] ---
    What's that?!
[17:32] ---
    Boss! Look!
[17:34] ---
    Your mommy has an outie!
    Your mommy has an outie!
[17:47] ---
    My--
[17:48] ---
    My mommy does not have an outie!
[17:56] ---
    Your mommy has an outie!
[17:58] ---
    She does not --
[17:59] ---
    Your mommy has an outie!
[18:00] ---
    --have an outie!
[18:02] ---
    Your mommy has an outie!
[18:03] ---
    You got that?!
[18:04] ---
    Your mommy has an outie!
[18:06] ---
    Damn you! Damn you! Damn you!
[18:11] ---
    Damn you! Damn you! You got that?!
    So shut the hell up!
[18:40] ---
    Do you know why they call me the Sunabouzu?
[18:45] ---
    Mommy does not have an outie...
[18:58] ---
    A balloon...?
[19:20] ---
    The boss...!
[19:22] ---
    He lost...!
[19:25] ---
    How did he fly like that...?
[19:27] ---
    That was spooky...
[19:28] ---
    No human can do that...!
[19:31] ---
    He's a ghost!
[19:32] ---
    The Ghost of the Desert - the Sunabouzu!
[19:40] ---
    Piece of cake--
[19:58] ---
    Huh? Oh, Boobie Lady...!
[20:02] ---
    You're pretty good! I got a nice,
    good look at how you work!
[20:07] ---
    You're too kind...!
[20:10] ---
    I'm here to get this too, you see.
[20:12] ---
    Eh?!
[20:13] ---
    My client is the same as yours, of course.
[20:16] ---
    It's nothing that great, but I
    guess it's really important to him
[20:22] ---
    because he's been throwing lots
    of money around to get it back!
[20:28] ---
    Don't tell me that huge explosion was--
[20:33] ---
    Yep. That was me.
[20:37] ---
    I figured having the famous
    Sunabouzu-san and the Kawazu Clan
[20:40] ---
    stamp each other out first
    would be the easiest way...
[20:47] ---
    I'm Asagiri Junko.
    I'll do anything for money.
[20:52] ---
    Hey, wait...!
[20:55] ---
    I expect to be your rival from
    now on, so I'll see you around!
[21:13] ---
    Don't tell me I've been tricked...?!
[21:17] ---
    Not me...!
[21:19] ---
    That's so totally uncool...!
[21:22] ---
    The Great Kanto Desert.
[21:25] ---
    In this hellish desert, man,
    the most violent and powerful creature
[21:31] ---
    in the history of the earth...
[21:36] ---
    Asagiri Junko! Just you watch!
    I will get it back...!
[21:44] ---
    You will pay for crushing
    a man's pure heart!
[21:49] ---
    Don't think you've won!
[21:51] ---
    I'm known far and wide for
    always carrying out my jobs!
[21:59] ---
    ...continues to thrive to this
    day, bursting with avarice.
[22:09] ---
    Wonder what I should do
    when I catch that wench...?!
[22:13] ---
    I could do all kinds of things
    with those humongous boobies...!
[22:20] ---
    I'm coming for you!
[22:22] ---
    Seriously, those were huge...!
[22:38] ---
    One circle... Two circles...
[22:46] ---
    One more big circle...
[22:50] ---
    A billowing raincoat...
    (It's a cape!)

[22:54] ---
    Oh, let's not forget
    the sunshade now...

[22:59] ---
    (His heart is pitch black!
    His heart is pitch black!)

[23:05] ---
    Give him a Winchester and
    suddenly you have Sunabouzu!

[23:21] ---
    He'll run again
    today! (Run again)

[23:24] ---
    Through the desert!
    (Even if forced to do jobs)

[23:28] ---
    He'll go forth again tomorrow!
    (Go forth again)

[23:32] ---
    (Until he gets the Boobie Lady)
[23:34] ---
    (Until he gets the Boobie Lady)
[23:36] ---
    (Until he gets the Boobie Lady!)
[23:38] ---
    
[23:56] ---
    Yo! Ghost of the Desert, Sunabouzu here!
[23:58] ---
    Next episode's boob lady is awesome!
[24:00] ---
    Hey! My mom is no boob lady!
[24:05] ---
    On the next Sunabouzu -
    Sand and Rain
[24:07] ---
    Miss it and you're dead meat!