E3 - Kukuri-hime

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:03] Kokuyo
    You there.
[00:08] Shirou
    Th... They're huge!
[00:14] Kokuyo
    You are Kagami Kazuya, are you not?
[00:17] Shirou
    No, not me.
[00:22] Kokuyou
    But you look just like him.
[00:23] Shirou
    In what universe?
SIGN    Kagami Kazuya
[00:25] Kokuyou
    I see. I have no business with you, then.
[00:27] Shirou
    Wh-Whoa, hang on a second!
[00:29] Shirou
    I can't let a chance like this slip by!
[00:32] Kokuyou
    What is it? I am quite busy.
[00:35] Shirou
    Well...
[00:36] Shirou
    Kazuya and I are friends, actually.
[00:39] Kokuyou
    What? Take me to him, now.
[00:43] Shirou
    Sure thing! But in exchange...
SIGN    Local Gods:
SIGN    Guardians enshrined in each region,
SIGN    who enforce the laws of creation by managing malison levels.
SIGN    Tsugumomo
[01:16] Character Signs
    Kiriha
[01:20] Character Signs
    Kagami Kazuya
[01:25] Character Signs
    Kokuyou
[01:25] Character Signs
    Kukuri
[01:28] Character Signs
    Chikaishi Chisato
[01:30] Character Signs
    Shiramine Shirou
[01:30] Character Signs
    Osanai Osamu
SIGN    Kettle
SIGN    Kukuri-hime
[02:29] ---
    "Kukuri-hime."
[02:40] (Flashback) Kukuri
    Should Kazuya-san awaken,
[02:42] (Flashback) Kukuri
    the situation will rapidly turn grave.
[02:44] (Flashback) Kukuri
    This necessitates emergency measures.
[02:47] (Flashback) Kiriha
    Measures...
[02:49] (Flashback) Kikuri
    I'll seal away the excess spiritual energy,
    along with all his memories of this incident.
[02:55] (Flashback) Kikuri
    That ought stabilize him.
[02:58] (Flashback) Kiriha
    Then, please!
[02:59] (Flashback) Kikuri
    The problem then becomes what happens to you.
[03:03] (Flashback) Kikuri
    A tsukumogami forgotten by its owner
[03:06] (Flashback) Kikuri
    will very quickly lose its power.
[03:09] (Flashback) Kikuri
    At worst, you might revert
    to no more than a mere obi.
[03:13] (Flashback) Kikuri
    For a tsukumogami,
    it would be akin to dying.
[03:19] (Flashback) Kiriha
    It matters not.
[03:24] Dad
    You forget anything, Kazuya?
[03:26] Dad
    Did you use the bathroom?
[03:28] Dad
    I'm gonna be home early tonight,
    so let's have dinner as a family.
[03:32] Kazuya
    Sure! I'm heading out, now.
[03:36] Kiriha
    My goodness.
[03:38] Kazuya
    What's up?
[03:40] Kiriha
    Kazuaki is quite the doting father.
[03:42] Kazuya
    I guess so.
[03:43] Kazuya
    He used to be more normal, I hear.
[03:47] Shirou
    Hey, Kazuya!
[03:50] Shirou
    Go to hell!
[03:55] Kazuya
    What was that for?!
[03:57] Shirou
    Stuff it!
[03:58] Shirou
    I had a world of trouble thanks to you!
SIGN    Yesterday
[04:02] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Now, hurry up and tell me
    where Kagami Kazuya is.
[04:06] (Flashback) Shirou
    Take it easy. We've barely met.
[04:10] (Flashback) Shirou
    Why not chat a bit first?
[04:12] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    I must attend to my commandment
    as quickly as possible.
[04:16] (Flashback) Shirou
    Why don't you at least order something?
[04:18] (Flashback) Shirou
    My treat!
[04:25] Shirou
    Damn you, Kazuya.
[04:27] Shirou
    You could have told me
    you knew a girl like this!
[04:30] Shirou
    Even if she's a little... well, a lot weird.
[04:33] Shirou
    Her hotness more than makes up for it!
[04:36] Shirou
    Especially that chest!
[04:38] Shirou
    How glorious!
[04:40] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    It's your treat, you said?
[04:42] (Flashback) Shirou
    Sure! Order whatever you want.
[04:45] (Flashback) Waitress
    Have you decided on your order?
[04:47] (Flashback) Shirou
    Let's see...
[04:49] (Flashback) Shirou
    Bring me a sirloin steak.
[04:52] (Flashback) Waitress
    The sirloin steak, then?
[04:54] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    With both soy garlic sauce
    and tomato garlic sauces.
[04:57] (Flashback) Waitress
    Soy garlic sauce and
    tomato garlic sauce...
[04:59] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Also, the mushroom and grated radish
    hamburger steak and a beef stew.
[05:04] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    A seafood doria and a Japanese
    teriyaki chicken doria,
[05:07] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    the shrimp and macaroni gratin,
    the deluxe beef curry,
[05:10] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    the free-range chicken cutlets,
    and the stewed flounder.
[05:12] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Also, the tuna tataki over rice and
    extra-fluffy rice omelet with ripe tomatoes,
[05:17] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    the wild vegetable soba,
    tofu and vegetable soup...
[05:19] (Flashback) Shirou
    Wait—
[05:20] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    The Shanghai fried rice with clear sauce,
[05:22] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    the stone-baked supreme pizza...
[05:23] (Flashback) Shirou
    Whoa, hold—
[05:24] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    ...and the pappardelle
    di melanzane con pomodorini.
[05:28] (Flashback) Servers
    Here's part of your order.
[05:30] (Flashback) Servers
    Here's more of your order.
[05:32] (Flashback) Servers
    Sorry about the wait!
[05:34] (Flashback) Servers
    Here's the rest!
[06:09] (Flashback) Servers
    She finished it all!
[06:13] (Flashback) Servers
    Please, take this assortment
    of cakes as a reward.
[06:16] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Right. Thank you.
[06:19] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    The meal was most appreciated. Farewell, now.
[06:23] (Flashback) Servers
    Thanks for dining with us!
[06:28] (Flashback) Shirou
    Well, I'd better get going—
[06:32] (Flashback) Servers
    Sir...
[06:34] Shirou
    So they took all the money I had,
[06:37] Shirou
    and on top of that, I'm in debt to Osamu now!
[06:39] Osamu
    Don't worry.
[06:40] Osamu
    You need but provide 500,000
    yen's worth of service.
[06:43] Osamu
    Erasing, screen tones...
    I've got plenty of work in mind.
[06:48] Shirou
    Right on, Osamu-sama! Just name it.
[06:52] Shirou
    After this, Shiramine Shirou
[06:54] Shirou
    was subjected to a summer
    of doujinshi creation hell.
[06:59] Kazuya
    Anyway, you said this lady
    was looking for me?
[07:02] Shirou
    I have no idea who she could be.
[07:04] Shirou
    Quit playing dumb!
    You can't deny the evidence!
[07:07] Kazuya
    So what am I supposed to say?
[07:13] (Flashback) Kukuri
    You knucklehead!
[07:15] (Flashback) Kukuri
    Ya get treated to a meal at a restaurant...
[07:18] (Flashback) Kukuri
    and ya end up forgettin' your job?!
[07:20] (Flashback) Kukuri
    You birdbrain!
[07:21] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    I'm terribly sorry.
[07:23] (Flashback) Kukuri
    Apologies ain't gonna cut it!
[07:25] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Lately, all I've had to eat are
    edible grass and mayonnaise,
[07:30] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    with my occasional sources of protein
    being frogs, snakes, and rats.
[07:34] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    I'm afraid the vision of
    such a feast stole my heart.
[07:39] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    The cause of all our ills is
    this shrine's donation situation.
[07:42] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Maybe if its deity were notable enough
    to have been in the Kojiki records...
[07:46] (Flashback) Kukuri
    So you're gonna go there?!
    When ya know I'm sore 'bout that?!
[07:49] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    I think you must be hearing things.
SIGN    Hakusan Shrine
[07:51] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    Who would dare call you a forgettable god,
[07:54] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    barely mentioned in a single
    sentence of the Nihon Shoki?
[07:57] (Flashback) Kukuri
    You, clearly!
[07:58] (Flashback) Kukuri
    I've done had it! Just bring
    Kagami Kazuya here already!
[08:03] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    I shall.
[08:03] (Flashback) Kukuri
    Make contact after he leaves school.
[08:06] (Flashback) Kukuri
    Got it? Don't go causin' a ruckus!
[08:09] (Flashback) Kukuri
    And don't bring the washcloth girl.
[08:17] Shirou
    So that being the case...
[08:18] Shirou
    I challenge you, with lunch on the line.
[08:21] Shirou
    I'm flat broke here, man!
[08:23] Shirou
    Besides, Kasumi-san personally
    prepares your lunches, right?
[08:27] Kazuya
    What do you see in that sister of mine?
[08:30] Shirou
    Come on. Arm wrestle me.
[08:35] Kiriha
    Arm wrestling, is it?
[08:37] Kazuya
    You know about that?
[08:38] Kiriha
    Naturally! It was quite the pastime of mine.
[08:42] Students
    My lunch!
[08:44] Students
    Oh, no! Mine's gone, too!
[08:46] Students
    I was really looking forward
    to that cutlet sandwich!
[08:48] Kazuya
    What the...
[08:50] Kazuya
    Kiriha-san, you didn't—
[08:53] Kazuya
    Sorry...
[08:54] Kiriha
    As long as you understand.
[08:56] Chi
    Could it be another amasogi?
[08:58] Kazuya
    Nah, it's just a thief or something.
[09:01] Kiriha
    But what human could
    consume the lunches of so many?
[09:06] Kokuyou
    Is Kagami Kazuya in here?!
[09:08] Everyone
    Found one!
[09:09] Shirou
    Wait! That's her!
[09:12] Shirou
    The bottomless stomach!
[09:14] Kokuyou
    Who are you?
[09:15] Shirou
    The guy who paid for your meal yesterday!
[09:18] Shirou
    Pay me back! Or let me fondle your tits!
[09:20] Kokuyou
    You were most generous to me yesterday.
[09:23] Kokuyou
    But you were the one who offered to pay.
[09:25] Shirou
    Not for every item on the menu!
[09:27] Shirou
    I got screwed over because of you!
[09:29] Kokuyou
    I'm sorry to hear that.
[09:31] Kokuyou
    But I have no money.
    You may rub my breasts.
[09:34] Shirou
    Yeah, I figured,
[09:35] Shirou
    but what are cops for
    if you can talk your way—
[09:38] (Flashback) Kokuyou
    But I have no money.
    You may rub my breasts.
[09:41] Chi
    Judgment!
SIGN    Decultu—
[09:44] Kokuyou
    That matter aside,
[09:46] ---
    Kagami Kazuya, you're coming with me.
[09:48] Kazuya
    Huh?
[09:50] Kiriha
    I think not!
[09:52] Kiriha
    I can hardly have you running
    off with my servant.
[09:56] Kazuya
    You promised you wouldn't come out!
[09:58] Kokuyou
    Do not hinder my commandment,
    lowly tsukumogami.
[10:02] Kiriha
    I take it you serve her? She failed
    to teach you any manners, I see.
[10:06] Kokuyou
    I was strictly told not to bring you along.
[10:09] Kokuyou
    Begone, washcloth girl.
[10:13] Kiriha
    What did you just say?
[10:15] Kokuyou
    We have no need of you, washcloth girl.
[10:19] Kiriha
    S-So Kukuri's dog dares bark at me?!
[10:22] Kiriha
    Face me, you ogress!
[10:23] Kazuya
    Let's handle this calmly! Okay?!
[10:26] Kiriha
    Unhand me, Kazuya!
[10:29] Kokuyou
    Lost your nerve?
[10:30] Kiriha
    What?!
[10:31] Kazuya
    Easy, easy! Let's resolve
    this in a peaceful way!
[10:37] Kiriha
    I know.
[10:39] Kiriha
    You, with the demon teats.
[10:41] Kokuyou
    What is it, washcloth girl?
[10:43] Kiriha
    Let us settle this dispute
    with a bout of arm wrestling.
[10:48] Kokuyou
    Very well.
[10:56] Kokuyou
    And why must I change into this outfit?
[10:59] Shirou
    That's the official arm wrestling uniform!
[11:02] Kazuya
    So it was your idea?
[11:03] Chi
    I can't believe you're at it again—
[11:05] Kazuya
    So it'll be a single
    round of arm wrestling.
[11:08] Kazuya
    If Kiriha-san wins,
    she comes with us to the shrine.
[11:11] Kazuya
    If she loses, she has to stay here.
[11:13] Kazuya
    I can't help but notice that
    I have to go either way.
[11:17] Kiriha
    Kazuya, here.
[11:19] Kiriha
    Remove this desk. It's in the way.
[11:23] Kiriha
    Each of us may use only one arm.
[11:25] Kiriha
    Both feet must remain planted at all times.
[11:28] Kiriha
    Fail to do so and you lose.
[11:29] Kiriha
    Connect with a clean blow
    to the face and you win.
[11:32] Kiriha
    If I win, you will take me to her.
[11:36] Kokuyou
    I accept.
[11:40] Shirou
    I thought this was arm wrestling?
[11:41] Kiriha
    Oh, it is.
[11:44] Kiriha
    But this is how we do it.
[12:27] PE
    Hey! What are you kids doing?!
[12:30] PE
    It's way past the end of lunch break!
[12:32] Shirou
    Sorry, we got a little absorbed
    in the arm wresting match.
[12:36] PE
    Arm wrestling?
[12:38] PE
    What are you talking about?
[12:41] PE
    Huh?
[12:44] Kokuyou
    A deal's a deal.
[12:46] Kokuyou
    Follow if you must, washcloth girl.
[12:49] Kiriha
    Call me that again and
    I will rend you asunder!
[12:52] Chi
    There goes my spotless attendance record...
[12:56] Kazuya
    Why'd you come along, anyway?
[12:58] Chi
    I had no idea there was
    a shrine on this mountain.
[13:02] Kiriha
    Unheard of by the locals. What a sorry state.
[13:06] Kazuya
    It's my first time coming this way.
[13:09] Kazuya
    Except... it somehow feels like it's not.
SIGN    Hakusan Shrine
[13:14] Kokuyou
    Here we are.
[13:16] Kokuyou
    Welcome to Hakusan Shrine.
[13:27] Kokuyou
    The mistress will now
    grace us with her presence.
SIGN    Kokuyou Conqueror of the entire menu!
[13:53] Kokuyou
    Tsugumomo.
[13:59] Kiku
    This is Tsugumomo.
[14:11] (Flashback) Kiku
    No surprise against this porcelain amasogi.
[14:13] (Flashback) Kiku
    A silk obi won't make a scratch.
[14:16] (Flashback) Kiku
    Will you call upon a hammer
    tsukumogami instead?
[14:19] (Flashback) Kanaka
    Nope, it's fine!
[14:20] (Flashback) Kanaka
    Let's go, Kiriha-chan!
[14:31] Kiku
    Behold the Great Incarnation of
    Hakusan-Myouri, Kukuri-hime no Ookami.
[14:36] Kazuya
    A mask?
[14:38] Kazuya
    Is she the goddess of this shrine?
[14:40] Chi
    That's a Noh mask—
    a ko-omote, to be exact.
[14:43] Kiriha
    Look at you, so desperate to seem impressive.
[14:45] Kiriha
    What's this, Kukuri?
[14:47] Kiriha
    Our much belated reunion,
    and you greet me in a Noh mask?
[14:51] Kokuyou
    Watch your mouth!
[14:53] Kiku
    I remember asking for only Kazuya-san...
[14:57] Kokuyou
    I'm terribly sorry.
[14:59] Kokuyou
    I was challenged by the washcloth girl.
[15:02] Kiriha
    And I dominated her!
[15:03] Kokuyou
    You barely won.
[15:05] Kiku
    I see. Arm wrestling, was it?
[15:07] Kiku
    Time hasn't dulled your skills, Kiriha.
[15:10] Kiriha
    Naturally!
[15:11] Kiriha
    I'm the one who leads you,
    125 wins to 123 losses.
[15:15] Kiriha
    What chance could your disciple have had?
[15:20] Kiku
    No, the record is actually 124 battles,
    123 losses, and 1 draw, to my advantage.
[15:26] Kiku
    Perhaps your mind has grown
    frail in lieu of your body.
[15:30] Kiriha
    Sounds to me like you've gone senile!
[15:32] Kiriha
    And what exactly do you mean, one draw?!
[15:34] Kiku
    Do you not recall the battle
    we called off due to heavy rain?
[15:38] Kiriha
    That drizzle was an excuse
    to dodge an imminent loss!
[15:40] Kiku
    At any rate, you do not
    have more wins than me!
[15:43] Kiku
    Stop making up stories!
[15:45] Kiriha
    Face the facts, you goddess of idiocy!
[15:47] Kiku
    How dare you, you washcloth youkai?!
[15:49] Kazuya
    Hey! No fighting, please!
[15:53] Kiku
    Now, the reason I summoned...
[15:54] Kiriha
    Hold. Before that...
[15:56] Kiriha
    The seal was to last until he had fully
    matured. Why has it broken already?
[16:01] Kiriha
    And the disruptions in malison...
[16:04] Kiriha
    Is there something at work here?
[16:06] Kiku
    The seal has not been completely broken.
[16:10] Kiku
    Its effect has weakened,
[16:12] Kiku
    but his memories tied to the truth
    remain sealed, don't they?
[16:15] Kiriha
    Yes.
[16:16] Kiriha
    But this is untenable.
[16:19] Kiriha
    You should reapply the seal
    and soothe the malison disruption.
[16:24] Kiku
    I cannot do that just yet.
[16:27] Kiriha
    What?!
[16:28] Kiku
    However, there is a solution.
[16:32] Kiku
    Kagami Kazuya.
[16:33] Kazuya
    Yes?
[16:34] Kiku
    You will see to the exorcism of
    the phenomena in this region.
[16:39] Kiku
    I call upon you to be a malison cleanser.
[16:41] Kazuya
    Malison cleanser?
[16:43] Kazuya
    Me? Not Kiriha-san?
[16:45] Kiriha
    Impossible!
[16:47] Kiriha
    Stop with your sadistic jokes!
[16:49] Kiriha
    You can have your priestess there
    handle the malison cleansing!
[16:52] Kiku
    I'm afraid I'm not joking.
[16:55] Kiku
    Kagami Kazuya-san...
[16:58] Kiku
    Over the last few days, you've been party
    to several strange occurrences, yes?
[17:02] Kazuya
    Yes...
[17:04] Kazuya
    In this ordinary town,
    such aberrations occur only around you.
[17:09] Kazuya
    Do you understand why that is?
[17:12] Kazuya
    No...
[17:14] Kiriha
    Enough, Kukuri!
[17:15] Kiku
    It is because you are the beacon
    that attracts the malison.
[17:22] Kiku
    The root of danger to all people,
    wherever you may go...
[17:26] Kiku
    That is what you are.
[17:30] Kiku
    The otherworldly threats caused by malison
    ought be dealt with by their very cause.
[17:35] Kiku
    Logical, wouldn't you say?
[17:37] Kiriha
    Ignore her, Kazuya!
[17:39] Kiriha
    That lying serpent simply
    wants you to do her bidding!
[17:43] Kiriha
    We're leaving!
[17:52] Kiriha
    A barrier?
[17:53] Kiku
    This is hallowed ground.
[17:55] Kiku
    I'm afraid you'll have no freedom until
    I receive an agreeable answer.
[18:00] Kiku
    Do you absolutely refuse?
[18:03] Kiriha
    Of course! Now drop this and let us through!
[18:09] Kiku
    I'm afraid I have no choice, then.
[18:12] Kiku
    I suppose I can at least
    eliminate the seed of calamity.
[18:18] Kokuyou
    Pardon me.
[18:22] Kazuya
    Chisato!
[18:26] Kiriha
    A hostage?! That's underhanded!
[18:28] Kiku
    I am simply removing the innocent bystander.
[18:31] Kiku
    I'll ask again...
[18:33] Kiku
    Will you accept the duty
    of cleansing the malison?
[18:36] Kazuya
    M-Me?
[18:38] Kiriha
    Enough!
[18:41] Kiku
    Very well. I won't tell
    you not to fight back.
[18:45] Kiku
    Run as you may, and make the most
    of your fleeting final moments.
[18:49] Kiriha
    Have you gone mad, Kukuri?!
[18:55] Kiku
    Bear witness...
[18:57] Kiku
    to the power of Kukuri-hime
    the water goddess.
[19:00] Kiku
    Now, dance for me, O droplets of water.
[19:06] Kiku
    Water Pressure.
[19:09] Kazuya
    Kiriha-san!
[19:10] Kiriha
    Get back, Kazuya!
[19:12] Kiku
    Pierce them, spouts of water...
[19:16] Kiriha
    Double-Woven Shield Weave!
[19:19] Kiku
    Water Spear.
[19:23] Kiriha
    She got through both layers like nothing!
[19:29] Kiriha
    Wing Weave!
[19:32] Kiriha
    I won't play your game!
[19:42] Kiku
    Did you think the barrier
    did not extend to the sky?
[19:46] Kazuya
    Kiriha-san!
[19:47] Kiirha
    Do not speak, lest you bite your tongue!
[19:50] Kiriha
    There is no way out. In that case...
[19:56] Kiriha
    The weakening of the seal...
    Her refusal to show her face...
[19:59] Kiriha
    It may very well mean...
[20:02] Kiriha
    Sledgehammer Weave!
[20:03] Kiku
    Water Curtain.
[20:06] Kiriha
    Greater Strike!
[20:10] Kiriha
    I have you now! Spiral Weave!
[20:13] Kiku
    Water Mirage. I'm afraid I have you now.
[20:21] Kazuya
    Kiriha-san!
[20:23] Kiku
    It was clever of you to aim for the Noh mask.
[20:26] Kiku
    As you have surmised, my power
    is currently tied to this mask.
[20:31] Kiku
    Not that such knowledge will help you.
[20:34] Kazuya
    Are you okay, Kiriha-san?
[20:42] Kazuya
    That's enough, Kiriha-san!
    I'll do what she wants!
[20:46] Kiriha
    Fool...
[20:48] Kiriha
    You needn't put yourself in the line of fire.
[20:52] Kiriha
    Just be silent, and stay behind me!
[20:54] Kazuya
    But I...
[20:55] Kiku
    Let us put an end to this, then.
[21:05] Kiku
    O noble white mountain peaks,
[21:10] Kiku
    gush forth with a blessed torrent...
[21:15] Kiriha
    She's using the full incantation!
[21:19] Kiku
    By the will of those whose
    dominion is all that swirls...
SIGN    Water Impact
[21:24] Kiku
    Water Impact!
[21:34] Kiriha
    What now?!
[21:36] Kiriha
    How do I stop this?!
[21:43] Kiku
    It's over.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
[23:21] Kazuya
    After taking the local god
    Kukuri-hime's attack,
[23:23] Kazuya
    Kiriha-san is in big trouble!
[23:24] Kazuya
    Her power spent,
    she's unable to keep fighting.
[23:27] Kazuya
    I need to help her! But how?!
[23:29] ---
    Next time on Tsugumomo,
    Chapter 4: "Trials of the Local God"!
SIGN    Trials of the Local God
[23:32] ---
    Don't miss it!
SIGN    Don't miss it!
SIGN    Tsugumomo
SIGN    Art by Nishijima Daisuke