E7 - A Second Death in This Freezing Season!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:09] Kaz
    Where am I?
[00:13] Kaz
    Oh, did I die again?
SIGN    KONOSUBA
    God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
SIGN    KONOSUBA
    God's Blessing on this Wonderful World!
SIGN    Episode 7
SIGN    "A Second Death in This Freezing Season!"
[01:53] Kaz
    After the battle with Verdia,
    a leader in the Devil King's army,
[01:56] Kaz
    the season turned to winter.
[01:58] Kaz
    That day, I groaned wholeheartedly,
    as if I were coughing up blood:
[02:04] Kaz
    I want money!
[02:06] Aqua
    Huh? Everyone wants that, obviously!
[02:10] Aqua
    Anyway, you're entirely too unresourceful.
[02:12] Aqua
    You make a goddess like myself
    sleep in a stable every single night!
[02:16] Aqua
    Aren't you ashamed of yourself?
[02:19] Aqua
    If you understand that,
    then give me more luxury.
[02:22] Aqua
    Spoil me more!
[02:25] Kaz
    Do you not get why I want more money?
[02:29] Aqua
    Huh?
[02:30] Kaz
    Debt!
[02:33] Kaz
    Thanks to the debt you've racked up,
[02:35] Kaz
    most of the reward money we earn
[02:38] Kaz
    from every quest we do is
    deducted to repay those debts!
[02:41] Kaz
    Just this morning... Just this morning,
[02:43] Kaz
    when I awoke in the straw of the stable,
    my eyelashes were frozen solid!
[02:48] Kaz
    If I keep sleeping in that stable,
    I'm going to freeze to death for sure!
[02:54] Aqua
    I can't help it!
[02:56] Aqua
    This city may have perished
    in that battle with Verdia,
[02:59] Aqua
    if not for my super astounding efforts!
[03:02] Aqua
    You should exalt me more!
[03:04] Aqua
    All of you should praise me,
    praise me, and spoil me rotten!
[03:07] Kaz
    You attention whore!
[03:09] Kaz
    If your feats were that astounding,
[03:12] Kaz
    then the rewards, accolades,
    and debt are all yours!
[03:16] Kaz
    Pay off your debts on your own.
[03:19] Aqua
    Wait! I'm sorry!
[03:21] Aqua
    I apologize for getting carried
    away, so don't abandon me!
[03:25] Dark
    Why all the fuss so early in the morning?
[03:27] Megu
    Do we have some nice job lined up?
[03:30] Kaz
    No, we haven't started looking for work yet.
[03:33] Kaz
    Given the situation and all...
[03:37] C
    What'll we do today?
[03:38] D
    I'm sleeping at the inn. It's cold!
[03:41] Megu
    The reward for fighting off a
    leader in the Devil King's army
[03:44] Megu
    was distributed to every
    adventurer who participated.
[03:48] Megu
    There's no reason for anyone to go
    hunting dangerous winter monsters
[03:51] Megu
    when their coin pouches are full.
[03:53] Megu
    I gladly welcome it, personally.
[03:56] Dark
    S-So do I.
[03:58] Dark
    The stronger the enemy, the better.
[04:00] All
    KO-NO-SU-BA!
[04:06] Kaz
    The reward is well and good, but there
    seriously aren't any decent quests...
[04:09] Dark
    Kazuma, Kazuma!
[04:10] Kaz
    I'm Kazuma.
[04:11] Dark
    How about this?
[04:13] Dark
    A kill quest for a pack of White Wolves.
    The reward is a million eris!
[04:17] Dark
    Just imagining a pack of wild
    beasts making a mess of me...
[04:23] Kaz
    Nope.
[04:24] Megu
    Kazuma, Kazuma!
[04:25] Kaz
    Yes, I'm Kazuma.
[04:26] Megu
    How about this?
[04:28] Megu
    A kill quest for a One-Shot Bear!
[04:31] Megu
    Now is the time for me to
    teach it which of us has
[04:35] Megu
    the stronger one-shot attack
    with my explosion magic!
[04:38] Kaz
    I want nothing to do with a monster
    with such a dangerous-sounding name.
[04:41] Kaz
    I bet we'd die instantly if it
    so much as grazed our necks.
[04:46] Kaz
    "The mobile fortress 'Destroyer' is approaching,
[04:49] Kaz
    so we are recruiting scouts to
    predict the route it will take."
[04:52] Kaz
    What is this? What's a "Destroyer"?
[04:56] Dark
    The Destroyer is the Destroyer.
[04:58] Dark
    It's a massive fortress
    that moves at high speed.
[05:01] Megu
    It lumbers around, trampling everything.
[05:04] Megu
    It's oddly popular with children.
[05:06] Kaz
    I see. I don't get it.
[05:09] Kaz
    Let's see. What's this?
[05:13] Kaz
    A Snow Sprite kill quest?
[05:15] Kaz
    Hey, what are Snow Sprites?
[05:18] Kaz
    They don't sound all that
    strong, based on the name,
[05:22] Kaz
    but it says the reward is 100,000 eris each.
[05:24] Megu
    There are lots of Snow
    Sprites in the snowy plains.
[05:27] Megu
    It's said that spring will come half a
    day sooner for every one you kill.
[05:31] Kaz
    Wow.
[05:31] Megu
    They're very weak monsters,
    so they're easily defeated, but...
[05:34] Aqua
    If we're accepting that
    quest, I'll go get ready!
[05:37] Kaz
    Hey, wait.
[05:39] Kaz
    You're laughing?
[05:40] Dark
    Snow Sprites, huh?
[05:43] Kaz
    Why does this masochistic crusader,
    who always wants to fight strong monsters,
[05:49] Kaz
    look so happy?
[05:52] Kaz
    Still, money takes priority right now!
[06:00] Kaz
    These are Snow Sprites?
[06:02] Kaz
    Hey, can't you do something
    about that outfit?
[06:06] Kaz
    You look like some dumb kid going
    cicada-catching in the middle of winter.
[06:09] Aqua
    I can catch Snow Sprites
    with this, and bottle them up.
[06:13] Aqua
    I had the idea that if we mix
    them in with our drinks,
[06:17] Aqua
    we can have ice-cold drinks whenever we want!
[06:20] Aqua
    Well? Aren't I smart?!
[06:22] Kaz
    I can see how this is going to play out...
[06:25] Kaz
    Darkness, what happened to your armor?
[06:27] Kaz
    Are you going to be all right in that gear?
[06:31] Dark
    No problem.
[06:33] Dark
    I'm a little cold, but that in itself is...
[06:39] Kaz
    I guess a pervert with steamy thoughts
    has a high body temperature to match.
SIGN    Kill Quest
SIGN    Kill the Snow Sprites!
[06:53] Kaz
    Number three, wait!
[06:57] Kaz
    Damn! It's darting all over!
[07:00] Aqua
    There!
[07:01] Aqua
    I caught my fourth one! Kazuma, look here!
[07:05] Aqua
    I caught a bunch!
[07:08] Kaz
    If my kill count comes out too low,
[07:11] Kaz
    I'll kill the Snow Sprites she caught, too.
[07:15] Kaz
    Now!
[07:20] Megu
    Kazuma!
[07:20] Kaz
    What?
[07:21] Megu
    Can I blow away all the ones in
    the area with explosion magic?
[07:24] Kaz
    All right! Wipe them all out!
[07:26] Megu
    Roger!
[07:29] Megu
    By my efflux of deep crimson,
[07:31] Megu
    topple this white world!
[07:36] Megu
    Explosion!
[08:04] Kaz
    Hey, are you all right?
[08:08] Megu
    I got eight of them.
[08:10] Megu
    That makes nine defeated Snow Sprites total.
[08:13] Megu
    I even went up a level.
[08:16] Kaz
    Oh, nice going!
[08:17] Kaz
    It would've been a little cooler if you
    weren't buried in the snow, though.
[08:22] Kaz
    What the heck?
[08:23] Kaz
    Killing Snow Sprites is totally delectable!
[08:28] Kaz
    Why doesn't everybody do this?
[08:31] Dark
    There it is!
[08:32] kaz
    Huh?
[08:38] Kaz
    Wh-What is that?!
[08:39] Dark
    So exciting...
[08:42] Kaz
    Sh-She's playing dead...
[08:44] Aqua
    Kazuma!
[08:46] Aqua
    I'll tell you why adventurers don't
    accept Snow Sprite kill quests.
[08:51] Kaz
    Huh?
[08:53] Aqua
    You lived in Japan,
[08:56] Aqua
    so I'm sure you've at least heard the name
    in the news and weather forecasts.
[08:59] Aqua
    He's the Snow Sprites' master,
[09:02] Aqua
    and is also said to evoke the image of winter...
[09:05] Aqua
    Yes,
[09:07] Aqua
    the Winter Shogun has arrived!
[09:13] Dark
    Th-The Winter Shogun!
[09:15] Dark
    One of the specially designated monsters
[09:18] Dark
    the country has put a huge bounty on!
[09:20] Kaz
    Huh?!
[09:22] Dark
    I'm sure this monster plans
    to use his position as shogun
[09:25] Dark
    to have his way with me.
[09:28] Dark
    I'll resist him,
[09:30] Dark
    but he will likely be beyond my
    capabilities, and I'll be shamed...
[09:34] Kaz
    Stupid!
[09:36] Kaz
    Everything in this good-for-nothing world,
    the people, the food, and the monsters,
[09:39] Kaz
    are all absolutely stupid!
[09:57] Dark
    M-My sword!
[10:05] Aqua
    Sprites pick up the subconscious
    thoughts of the people they encounter
[10:09] Aqua
    and take their form.
[10:11] Aqua
    But the only ones strolling
    around outside town
[10:14] Aqua
    in winter are mostly just cheat-users
    who came here from Japan.
[10:18] Kaz
    So this guy was brought to life by some
    idiot who came here from Japan,
[10:21] Kaz
    whose train of thought associated
    winter with the Winter Shogun?!
[10:25] Kaz
    Talk about a pain in the ass!
[10:29] Kaz
    When this is over, I'm gonna step on the girl
    who's been playing dead this whole time.
[10:34] Aqua
    Kazuma!
[10:35] Kaz
    What is it?!
[10:36] Aqua
    The Winter Shogun is generous.
[10:38] Aqua
    If we politely apologize, he'll overlook this!
[10:49] Aqua
    Prostrate yourself!
    Prostrate yourself before him!
[10:51] Aqua
    Come on, everyone, toss your
    weapons aside and bow down!
[10:54] Aqua
    Apologize! You hurry up
    and apologize too, Kazuma!
[10:59] Kaz
    The former-something-or-other who appears
    to have abandoned all of her pride
[11:03] Kaz
    prostrated herself quite
    magnificently, indeed.
[11:08] Kaz
    Hey, hurry and bow your head, too!
[11:11] Dark
    There may be nobody watching,
[11:12] Dark
    but a knight such as myself would
    never bow her head to a monster.
[11:17] Kaz
    You try to go off with monsters
    willingly all the time!
[11:20] Kaz
    Don't show off your pointless
    pride only at times like these!
[11:24] Dark
    S-Stop it!
[11:26] Dark
    You're forcing me to bow my
    head when I don't want to,
[11:29] Dark
    and shoving my face into the ground!
[11:31] Kaz
    Huh?
[11:33] Dark
    What a reward!
[11:36] Dark
    The snow is so cold...
[11:38] Aqua
    Kazuma!
[11:40] Aqua
    Your weapon, your weapon!
[11:41] Aqua
    Hurry and throw down the
    sword you're holding!
[11:55] Kaz
    That's right.
[11:56] Kaz
    I was killed by the Winter Shogun.
[12:00] Eris
    Satou Kazuma-san.
[12:03] Eris
    Welcome to the afterlife.
[12:06] Eris
    I am Eris, the goddess who will
    lead you down a new path.
[12:12] Eris
    Your life in this world is now over.
[12:20] Kaz
    This feels familiar.
[12:24] Kaz
    Is this how it was when I met Aqua, too?
[12:29] kaz
    Are you a goddess of this world?
[12:32] Eris
    Yes. Satou Kazuma-san,
[12:35] Eris
    you came all the way from
    peaceful Japan to this world,
[12:39] Eris
    only for this to happen to you...
[12:42] Kaz
    What's with this goddess?
[12:44] Kaz
    Is she sincerely mourning my death?
[12:47] Kaz
    She's not like that useless goddess!
[12:50] Eris
    Brave hero who came from a parallel world...
[12:52] Kaz
    Y-Yes?
[12:54] Eris
    With my power,
[12:56] Eris
    I shall have you reincarnated in
    peaceful Japan, to an affluent family,
[12:59] Eris
    and will make sure you
    lead a life of comfort.
[13:03] Kaz
    Huh? You can do that?
[13:06] Eris
    If you wish it.
[13:08] Kaz
    Seriously?!
[13:10] Kaz
    I-If possible, I'd like
[13:12] Kaz
    above-average parameters in
    charm, wisdom, and strength,
[13:14] Kaz
    and I'd be even happier in a life where
    a beautiful girl is my childhood friend!
[13:18] Eris
    Um, that is more than I can...
[13:21] Kaz
    Wow, thank goodness!
[13:23] Kaz
    I thought it was all over,
[13:25] Kaz
    but now it feels like I pulled
    through by the skin of my teeth.
[13:28] Kaz
    This is a reward for trying my hardest, right?
[13:32] Kaz
    Because my life up to now had been so awful!
[13:35] Eris
    Yes.
[13:36] Eris
    I looked in on your life
    from time to time myself.
[13:40] Eris
    I believe your days were
    filled with adversity.
[13:43] Kaz
    You said it!
[13:45] Kaz
    I reincarnated thinking I'd get to go on
    a thrilling adventure, like in a game.
[13:50] Kaz
    This is like a misleading promo video, isn't it?
[13:54] Kaz
    The useless goddess who came
    with me as a reincarnation perk
[13:56] Kaz
    was just an arrogant good-for-nothing.
[13:59] Kaz
    We recruited allies,
[14:01] Kaz
    but the only ones who turned up were a crazy
[14:03] Kaz
    explosion girl who fell flat
    every time she used magic,
[14:05] Kaz
    and a masochistic,
[14:07] Kaz
    perverted crusader whose attacks always missed.
[14:10] Kaz
    I was an adventurer,
[14:12] Kaz
    but I did construction, side jobs,
    and was forced into cabbage hunting.
[14:16] Kaz
    I was in debt deep enough to sell an
    organ after defeating a boss enemy.
[14:21] Kaz
    Sleeping in the stables didn't restore my
    strength, it only froze me nearly to death.
[14:27] Kaz
    Do you know how it feels to have your
    eyelashes frozen solid every morning?
[14:31] Kaz
    The previous world's game balance
    was beyond terrible, if you ask me.
[14:45] Kaz
    H-Huh?
[14:51] Kaz
    Why?
[14:53] Eris
    After you've been reborn,
[14:56] Eris
    may you be blessed once
    more with kind encounters.
[15:06] Kaz
    I see.
[15:08] Kaz
    It appears
[15:10] Kaz
    I was unexpectedly fond of
    that good-for-nothing world
[15:15] Kaz
    that I thought I hated...
[15:18] Kaz
    I wanted to adventure with
    those girls a little longer.
[15:24] Aqua
    Now, return to us, Kazuma!
[15:26] Kaz
    Huh?!
[15:27] Aqua
    How could you get killed off so easily?
[15:29] Aqua
    It's too soon for you to die!
[15:31] Kaz
    Wh-What?!
[15:32] Eris
    Th-This voice... Aqua-senpai?!
[15:35] Eris
    Is it really you?!
[15:36] Aqua
    Hey, Kazuma, can you hear me?
[15:38] Aqua
    I cast recovery magic on your body,
[15:41] Aqua
    so you can come back to this side now.
[15:43] Kaz
    Oh, for real?!
[15:45] Eris
    P-Please wait a moment!
[15:47] Eris
    You've been reborn once already,
    so according to the laws of Heaven,
[15:50] Eris
    you can't be revived again!
[15:53] Kaz
    Is that true?
[15:54] Kaz
    Aqua!
[15:55] Kaz
    She says that according to the
    laws of Heaven or whatever,
[15:59] Kaz
    I can't be revived again since
    I've been reborn once before!
[16:02] Aqua
    Huh? What goddess is spouting that nonsense?
[16:06] Aqua
    Hey, you! Identify yourself!
[16:08] Aqua
    Where does a goddess in charge of a
    backwater like this get off talking to me,
[16:12] Aqua
    an elite in charge of Japan, that way?!
[16:15] Kaz
    Hey, knock it off!
[16:16] Kaz
    The face of the goddess in charge
    of that backwater is twitching now!
[16:21] Eris
    Um,
[16:22] Eris
    she's a goddess called "Eris"...
[16:24] Aqua
    Eris?!
[16:26] Aqua
    The overrated Eris who's grown cocky
    and even became a unit of currency,
[16:29] Aqua
    just because she's worshiped a little
    in the established religion of this world?
[16:33] Aqua
    Hey, Kazuma!
[16:34] Kaz
    Yes?
[16:34] Aqua
    If Eris gives you any more trouble,
[16:37] Aqua
    I'll confiscate her breast pads—
[16:38] Eris
    I-I understand!
[16:39] Kaz
    Pads?
[16:39] Eris
    An exception! I'll deem this an exception!
[16:41] Eris
    I'll open the gate right now!
[16:43] Kaz
    They're pads?
[16:44] Eris
    My goodness,
[16:45] Eris
    Aqua-senpai is as unreasonable as ever.
[16:46] Kaz
    They're really pads?!
[16:48] Eris
    KONOSUBA!
[16:49] Kaz
    I don't mind if they're pads.
[16:53] Eris
    You have now been connected
    to the living world.
[16:55] Eris
    This normally never happens, you know.
[17:00] Eris
    You are called Kazuma-san, correct?
[17:02] Kaz
    Huh? Oh, uh, yes!
[17:09] Eris
    This is our little secret, okay?
[17:31] Megu
    ...zuma! Kazuma, please wake up!
[17:34] Megu
    Kazuma!
[17:38] Aqua
    Oh, you're finally awake?
[17:40] Aqua
    Sheesh, that girl's so hard-headed.
[17:43] Both
    Kazuma!
[17:46] Kaz
    Th-This is kind of extremely embarrassing.
[17:50] Aqua
    Hey, come on, Kazuma.
[17:52] Aqua
    What're you blushing for? Say something!
[17:57] Aqua
    I brought you back to life, you know.
[18:00] Aqua
    Don't you have something to say?
[18:02] Aqua
    Come on.
[18:04] Kaz
    I want to trade this useless goddess
    for that cute goddess from earlier.
[18:09] Aqua
    Say something.
[18:11] Aqua
    Like words of gratitude, or an apology
    for how you've treated such a
[18:14] Aqua
    high-class goddess with such
    contempt all this time...
[18:17] Kaz
    Goddess change!
[18:19] Aqua
    Fine, you damn NEET!
[18:22] Aqua
    Why don't I send you to
    meet Eris right away, then?!
[18:27] Dark
    N-Now, now, calm down, Aqua!
[18:30] Megu
    How do you feel?
[18:32] Megu
    Do you feel strange in any way?
[18:35] Kaz
    It looks like I'm all right for now.
[18:38] Megu
    You are?
[18:39] Megu
    You were killed in such a
    terrible way, after all...
[18:41] Kaz
    Huh?
[18:42] Kaz
    H-How was I killed?
[18:45] Aqua
    You were beheaded by the Winter Shogun.
[18:48] Aqua
    It was quite a splendid slice.
[18:51] Kaz
    B-Beheaded?!
[18:59] Kaz
    Winter in this world is
[19:01] Kaz
    a season where only those who make
    it through the struggle for survival,
[19:05] Kaz
    despite the scarce food and harsh environment,
[19:07] Kaz
    are allowed to remain alive and active.
[19:10] Kaz
    There aren't any quests beginners
    like us can complete easily.
[19:16] Kaz
    Okay, retreat!
SIGN    Kill The Snow Sprites!
SIGN    Kill Quest
SIGN    Retired
[19:20] All
    KONOSUBA!
[19:29] Aqua
    Ta-da!
[19:30] Megu
    A Snow Sprite?
[19:33] Aqua
    I didn't only prostrate myself.
[19:36] Aqua
    I pretended to set them all
    free, but I saved just one.
[19:40] Aqua
    I guess even the Winter Shogun couldn't
    see through my convincing performance!
[19:44] Kaz
    Way to go, Aqua!
[19:46] Kaz
    All right, hand it over and I'll kill it.
[19:49] Aqua
    What?! No!
[19:50] Aqua
    I'm going to take this one home
    and make it a refrigerator!
[19:53] Kaz
    The reward for killing those is 100,000 each!
[19:56] Aqua
    No! Not this one!
[19:58] Aqua
    I've already given it a name!
[20:00] Aqua
    I won't let you kill it!
[20:02] Aqua
    Don't! Don't!
[20:03] Kaz
    She's resisting more than I expected.
[20:05] Dark
    Let her be, Kazuma.
[20:08] Kaz
    Oh, fine.
[20:13] Aqua
    I'll raise it with care,
[20:15] Aqua
    and when summer comes,
    I'll have it make lots of ice.
[20:18] Aqua
    Then we'll open a snow cone shop!
[20:20] Aqua
    We'll sleep together on hot, restless nights.
[20:24] Aqua
    Hey, what does this little one eat?
[20:26] Megu
    Do Snow Sprites eat anything to begin with?
[20:29] Dark
    They look so fluffy and soft.
[20:33] Dark
    I bet if you put some sugar on it and took
    a bite, it'd actually be really tasty.
[20:36] Aqua
    I-I won't let you eat it!
[20:38] Megu
    Actually, I've worked up an appetite.
[20:42] Aqua
    Let's order something!
[20:44] Aqua
    I wonder what I should choose.
[20:47] Kaz
    That goddess...
[20:50] Kaz
    She mourned my death so much,
[20:53] Kaz
    and smiled kindly when I was revived.
[20:58] (Flashback) Eris
    This is our little secret, okay?
[21:02] Kaz
    A righteous, beautiful
    girl who's not an oddball!
[21:06] Kaz
    Finally, so long after I came to this world, the main heroine has appeared!
[21:10] Aqua
    Kazuma, aren't you going to eat?
[21:12] Kaz
    Huh?
[21:15] Kaz
    Hey, how much did you guys order?!
[21:18] Megu
    Once you become as great a magician as I am,
[21:20] Megu
    you require great sacrifices
    in order to function.
[21:24] Aqua
    What's with you?
[21:25] Kaz
    What is it?!
[21:25] Aqua
    I brought you back to life today, Kazuma!
[21:28] Kaz
    Huh?
[21:28] Aqua
    There's nothing wrong with a
    reward of this size, is there?
[21:31] Aqua
    I put a little of the reward
    from the quest into it, too!
[21:33] Kaz
    That money was to get us through the winter!
[21:35] Dark
    What's the problem?
[21:36] Kaz
    What?!
[21:37] Dark
    If we run out of money, we can
    just accept another quest.
[21:40] Dark
    What sort of monster would be good next?
[21:42] Dark
    Maybe one that secretes a lot of slime,
[21:45] Dark
    or one with repulsive tentacles?
[21:49] Dark
    Just imagining it makes me
    quiver with excitement!
[21:53] Kaz
    On second thought, I should've
    reincarnated in Japan.
[21:57] Kaz
    I made the wrong choice...
SIGN    The magician of extraordinary genius: Megumin. Beneath her charming exterior lay tremendous explosion magic, which was of such splendor, it was even artistic. She brought tears to the eyes of everyone, from children to the elderly, and even to wicked monsters. Spectators rushed in from around to the world to catch a glimpse of her wonderful magic, to the extent it became a subject of public concern. Record of the Great Magician - Chapter 126
SIGN    Episode 8
SIGN    A Loving Hand for Our Party When We Can't Make It Through Winter!