E9 - Find Fuku-chan!

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Sekine
    Huh? Did I fall asleep?
[00:02] Boys
    That thing yesterday was awesome!
[00:05] Boys
    I know, right? That one thing, right?
[00:07] Boys
    Right, right!
[00:11] Sekine
    Wait, what? What's going on?
[00:19] Sekine
    I've turned into a boy!
SIGN    Class 2-B
    Air Band
SIGN    The
SIGN    Lit
SIGN    tle
SIGN    Lies
SIGN    We
SIGN    All
SIGN    Tell
SIGN    The Little Lies We All Tell
SIGN    The Little Lies We All Tell
SIGN    The Little Lies We All Tell
SIGN    Rikka
SIGN    Colonel
SIGN    Chiyo-san
SIGN    Chiyo-san
SIGN    Ninja
SIGN    Sekine
SIGN    Psychic
SIGN    Tsubasa
SIGN    Tsuyoshi
SIGN    Boy
SIGN    Note:
     Is Sekine
SIGN    Maskuma Mask
SIGN    Class 2-B
    Air Band
SIGN    Poeh
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
SIGN    #09: Find Fuku-chan!
[02:01] Chiyo
    Finished!
[02:03] Chiyo
    Tsubasa-san, your hair is so pretty!
[02:07] Chiyo
    You have the shiniest cuticles!
[02:09] Tsubasa
    Um, thanks.
[02:11] Sekine
    It's gotta be that androgynous appeal
    of yours that makes you so popular.
[02:16] Tsubasa
    Androgynous...
[02:18] Sekine
    You know, "The Prince of
    the All-Girls' School" trope.
[02:21] Rikka
    So handsome!
[02:22] Chiyo
    N-No! Tsubasa-san is a cute, pretty girl!
[02:33] Rikka
    Miss Tsubasa must want to be a princess, too.
[02:38] Rikka
    I know! I'll keep Miss Tsubasa as a girl
SIGN    Greatest in the Galaxy
SIGN    Wicked
SIGN    Girly
SIGN    Super Princess
[02:41] Rikka
    and transform everyone else into boys.
[02:45] Sekine
    You mean, you want to make Tsubasa
    a princess in a hot boy harem?
SIGN    Not bad
[02:50] Rikka
    All right! Let's make that dream come true!
SIGN    Katsu!!
[02:54] Rikka
    Katsu!
[02:58] Sekine
    Swirl...
SIGN    Swirl...
[03:01] Sekine
    That's right.
[03:02] Chiyomaru
    Sekine-kun.
[03:05] Chiyomaru
    You should get changed, already.
[03:07] Sekine (Boy)
    U-Um...
[03:10] Sekine (Boy)
    Who are you?
[03:11] Chiyomaru
    What do you mean? I'm Chiyomaru.
[03:15] Sekine (Boy)
    Chiyomaru...?
[03:19] Sekine (Boy)
    Oh!
[03:20] Sekine (Boy)
    Chiyo-san!
[03:22] Chiyomaru
    It's Chiyomaru.
[03:23] Sekine (Boy)
    I just remembered something I gotta do!
[03:28] Sekine (Boy)
    Rikka! Where are you?!
SIGN    Lucky Perv
SIGN    Blank...
[03:41] Narrator
    Lucky perv.
[03:43] Sekine (Boy)
    Um, Tsubasa?
[03:47] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    It's meant to be a secret, but I'm here
    in place of my older brother, Tsuyoshi.
SIGN    Keep the locker
     room clean.
[03:51] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    So, please call me Tsuyoshi.
[03:53] Sekine (Boy)
    Huh, I see.
[03:55] Sekine
    This is what it means
    to make Tsubasa a princess?
[03:58] Sekine
    I have to admit, it's a bit interesting.
[04:00] Sekine
    And I'm a guy...
[04:02] Sekine
    I should take advantage of this opportunity
    to try things that only guys can do.
[04:07] Sekine (Boy)
    Tsuyoshi, I have a favor to ask.
[04:09] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    What is it?
[04:11] Sekine (Boy)
    Please let me do it.
SIGN    Nurse's Office
[04:17] Sekine (Boy)
    Did you have to hit me?
[04:19] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Sorry, but you share the blame here.
[04:24] Sekine (Boy)
    Oh, I'm bleeding. I knew it.
[04:27] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    H-He's handsome!
[04:29] Sekine (Boy)
    You can make up for it by buying me lunch
    at the cafeteria later.
[04:34] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    I guess we could kiss or something.
    I do feel sorry about hitting you.
[04:38] Sekine (Boy)
    Nah, I can always do that as a girl.
[04:43] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    That aside, Sekine... You're going
    to be late for the Barfathon.
[04:46] Sekine (Boy)
    Barfathon? What's that?
[04:49] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Did I hit you in the wrong place?
[04:51] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Remember? Today's the day of
    the annual "Loincloth Walking Race."
[04:56] Narrator
    A race where contestants walk, clad only in
    loincloths, all the way to Gunma Prefecture!
[05:00] Narrator
    Due to the high number of people who
    throw up, it has the nickname "Barfathon."
[05:04] Narrator
    Yes, this is a middle school event.
[05:07] Sekine
    That's way too hardcore.
[05:10] Sekine
    But given my injury,
    I should be able to opt out.
[05:13] Chiyomaru
    Sekine-kun, have you seen Rikkard-kun?
[05:17] Rikka
    I'm right here!
[05:21] Sekine
    The Colonel is still a girl?
[05:24] Chiyomaru
    Rikkard-kun...
[05:26] Rikka
    Who is this handsome boy?
[05:28] Chiyo
    Rikka-chan!
[05:29] Rikka
    Is it Chiyo...
[05:31] Rikka
    san...
[05:33] Chiyomaru
    What is that outfit you're wearing?
[05:36] Chiyomaru
    How many times do I have to tell you?!
[05:38] Chiyomaru
    I hate guys who aren't manly!
[05:41] Chiyomaru
    What are these? Hair extensions?
[05:43] Chiyomaru
    Is this your real hair?
[05:44] Rikka
    Ow, ow...
[05:46] Chiyomaru
    Tsuyoshi, the clippers.
[05:48] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Here.
[05:51] Chiyomaru
    Rikkard, I'm shaving your head.
[05:56] Rikka
    I'd prefer you didn't—
[06:02] Chiyomaru
    Did I just hear something?
[06:04] Rikka
    Nothing at all!
[06:06] Sekine
    I see...
SIGN    Maidenly Chiyo
[06:07] Sekine
    Chiyo-san is very girly.
SIGN    Tough Guy Chiyomaru
[06:10] Sekine
    But as a boy, she's the opposite.
[06:14] Sekine
    Tsubasa is...
[06:16] Sekine
    somehow cuter.
[06:19] Sekine
    Is it because of her princess position?
[06:23] Sekine (Boy)
    Tsuyoshi, what are you going
    to do about the Barfathon?
[06:26] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    I'm opting out, of course.
    I can't do it for many reasons.
[06:29] Sekine (Boy)
    I see. I guess I'll opt out, as well.
[06:32] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    What are you talking about?
[06:34] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    You need a signed document from your
    legal guardian to opt out. You know that.
SIGN    Huh
[06:43] Sekine (Boy)
    Huh?
[06:57] Chiyomaru
    We'll continue this after the Barfathon.
[07:00] Chiyomaru
    Hurry up and get ready.
    You don't want to be late.
[07:03] Sekine (Boy)
    Look! My head is busted open!
    There's so much blood!
[07:07] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    You can't go home sick unless
    you have a fever or something.
[07:09] Sekine (Boy)
    What?!
[07:11] Chiyomaru
    Are you trying to commit truancy?
[07:12] Sekine (Boy)
    Never!
[07:15] Sekine (Boy)
    I'm cold! It hurts!
    I don't wanna do this anymore!
[07:18] Sekine (Boy)
    What kind of event is this?!
    It's ridiculous! Unbelievable!
[07:23] Chiyomaru
    Sekine-kun, did you just say something?
[07:25] Sekine (Boy)
    I love the Barfathon! Gung ho!
[07:28] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Sekine.
[07:31] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Just give up and accept it.
[07:33] Sekine
    Not fair!
[07:34] Chiyomaru
    Let's follow Rikkard-kun's lead
    and do our best!
[07:41] Rikka
    I'm glad I included "UFO travel counts
    as walking" in the brainwashing program.
[07:45] Rikka
    One quick hop to Gunma!
[07:47] Sekine
    Why did you include
    the Barfathon in the first place?!
[07:56] Rikka
    Goal!
[07:56] Rikka
    Goal, goal, goal, goal, goal!
[08:08] Rikka
    It seems I've tried a little too hard.
[08:11] Narrator
    The space alien wins!
[08:20] Rikka
    Almost there!
[08:23] Sekine (Boy)
    Ugh, so tough... I'm spent...
[08:25] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    Fight on, Sekine.
[08:27] Chiyomaru
    The goal is right there. Fight on!
[08:30] Rikka
    You all did so well!
[08:33] Tsuyoshi (Girl)
    You got first place again! Awesome!
[08:35] Chiyomaru
    You did great, Rikkard-kun.
    I knew you could do it.
[08:42] Chiyomaru
    Now, let's pick up where we left off.
[08:44] Chiyomaru
    I hope you're ready.
[08:49] Rikka
    I'm sorry, Miss Tsubasa!
    I can't take any more!
[08:52] Rikka
    Katsu!
[09:01] Rikka
    Where...
[09:03] Sekine
    ...are we?
[09:04] Tsubasa
    Hey, you two.
[09:06] Tsubasa
    You're going to be late.
[09:09] Rikka
    Late for the Barfathon?!
[09:11] Sekine
    I have no idea what you're
    talking about, ma'am!
[09:13] Tsubasa
    The tea party, of course.
[09:15] Tsubasa
    Did you hit your head or something?
    It's an annual event.
[09:20] Chiyo
    I baked some sweets.
[09:23] Rikka
    A tea party!
[09:24] Sekine
    How elegant!
[09:27] Rikka & Sekine
    All-girls schools are the best!
[09:31] Rikka
    Flowers are beautiful
    because they're destined to fall.
SIGN    The Little Lies We All Tell
[09:34] Sekine
    Oh, no.
[09:48] Sekine
    I'm broke this month, as always.
[09:51] Hot guy
    Maybe what you're really concerned about
[09:54] Hot guy
    is the fact that your family
    won't come back.
[09:59] Narrator
    A hot guy in an all-girls middle school?!
[10:01] Narrator
    Sir, did you wander into the wrong show?
[10:05] Sekine
    Who are you?
[10:10] Hot guy
    I can't talk about that here.
[10:19] Hot guy
    Come see me behind the gym tomorrow.
[10:25] Hot guy
    I'll reveal everything to you then.
[10:28] Sekine
    Why does it have to be out there?
[10:30] Hot guy
    What? It's only natural to want to see
    cute girls away from other people.
[10:35] Hot guy
    Let's meet alone.
[10:37] Sekine
    Stop kidding around!
[10:40] Hot guy
    You're cute when you're angry, as well.
[10:46] Hot guy
    Don't be so cautious.
[10:48] Hot guy
    I know you're always working very hard.
[10:56] Hot guy
    Oh, by the way.
[10:59] Hot guy
    Take off your glasses. You're cuter that way.
[11:05] Hot guy
    See you.
[11:09] Sekine
    What was that?
[11:15] Sekine
    Was that a teacher from a
    different grade or something?
[11:19] Sekine
    I don't recognize him, though.
[11:25] Tsubasa
    You look down. Is everything okay?
[11:29] Rikka
    No, it's not. My pet ran away.
[11:34] Chiyo
    Oh, dear.
[11:35] Rikka
    Where could you have gone?
[11:41] (Flashback) Rikka
    A cute animal, here?!
[11:45] (Flashback) Rikka
    Let's help each other to survive
    here on this planet, my comrade.
[11:59] (Flashback) Rikka
    Don't just start running. It's dangerous.
[12:01] (Flashback) Rikka
    Hey!
[12:02] Narrator
    And he just ran off like that.
[12:06] Rikka
    Fuku-chan...
[12:08] Sekine
    What kind of name is that?
[12:10] Rikka
    Lost on a foreign planet...
    He must be so lonely.
[12:15] Rikka
    No, he's fine!
[12:17] Rikka
    Fuku-chan has the ability to embed
    spores into a target's brain
[12:22] Rikka
    to show them an illusion
    of the target's ideal partner!
[12:30] Rikka
    He'll certainly be popular
    on this planet, as well!
[12:41] Sekine
    Spores...?
[12:44] Sekine
    Wait, so that guy earlier was an illusion
    shown to me by the Colonel's pet?
SIGN    Just the right amount
    of aggressiveness
SIGN    Understands family issues
SIGN    Ideal age difference
SIGN    Beauty mark
    beside mouth
SIGN    Squee!
     (Translation: You like guys
     like this, don't you?)
[12:50] Sekine
    So that's my ideal partner...
SIGN    Aaaaaaaaaaa...
[12:58] Narrator
    She can't come to terms
    with her maidenly desires.
[13:01] Sekine
    Tsubasa...
[13:03] Tsubasa
    What?
[13:05] Sekine
    I'm sorry I called you a pierced
    female animal the other day.
[13:09] Narrator
    She has regrets.
[13:10] Tsubasa
    It's all right.
[13:13] Tsubasa
    But in that case, can I ask you for a favor?
[13:16] Sekine
    What is it?
[13:17] Tsubasa
    Well, there's this person I'm seeing.
[13:23] Sekine
    I thought this was about a favor?
[13:27] Sekine
    Wait, you have a boyfriend?
[13:29] Tsubasa
    No, it's not like that.
[13:33] Tsubasa
    Umm...
[13:36] Tsubasa
    We just started talking at the convenience
    store yesterday, and we got along so well.
[13:41] Tsubasa
    And...
[13:45] Tsubasa
    I got invited to meet up, just the two of us!
[13:52] Sekine
    Don't tell me,
    on the back of Tsubasa's head...
[13:55] Tsubasa
    I was like, wow, how can
    someone so nice exist in reality?
[14:00] Sekine
    Move your hand!
[14:02] Tsubasa
    I totally feel, like, this is destiny.
[14:06] Sekine
    Ugh, how stubborn...
[14:09] Tsubasa
    What are you doing, Sekine?
    You're being weird.
[14:15] Narrator
    He's basically a breeding ground.
[14:17] Sekine
    Tsubasa, I think that person
    is on a different plane of existence.
[14:24] Sekine
    Or rather, not plane, but... planet?
[14:28] Tsubasa
    I mean, it did cross my mind a little.
[14:31] Tsubasa
    There's a bit of an age gap.
    It might not work out.
[14:34] Woman
    Tsuyoshi-kun!
[14:35] Sekine
    But that romance will only hurt y—
[14:38] Rikka
    Not necessarily!
[14:40] Rikka
    No matter how it ends,
    romance adds color to a dull life!
[14:45] Sekine
    Colonel, just shut up for a second.
[14:48] Sekine
    Oh, wait. Tsubasa does tend to become
    super stupid when men get involved.
[14:52] Sekine
    Maybe this is a good time for her
    to experience a heartbreak of her own?
[14:56] Tsubasa
    What is it?
[14:59] Rikka
    Life is short, so fall in love, girls.
[15:03] Rikka
    Fuku-chan, even if you never come back,
SIGN    Win-Win Relationship
SIGN    Win-Win Relationship
[15:06] Tsubasa
    A win-win relationship!
[15:06] Rikka
    I hope you can live a happy life with
    a partner of your own on this planet.
[15:10] Rikka
    But...
[15:11] Rikka
    But that's a dream that can never come true.
[15:15] Sekine
    Uh-oh. Sounds bad.
[15:16] Rikka
    Fuku-chan uses illusions to lure in prey,
    and then, while the victim is enraptured,
[15:22] Rikka
    eats them and converts them into nutrients.
[15:28] Tsubasa
    So, I got invited to a sleepover tonight.
[15:33] Sekine
    Don't!
[15:34] Chiyo
    Please, no!
[15:37] Chiyo
    Tsubasa-san, you can't sleep over
    at a stranger's house!
[15:42] Tsubasa
    It's fine!
[15:44] Tsubasa
    So, Sekine, can you just say
    I was at your house?
[15:49] Sekine
    Tsubasa...
[15:51] Sekine
    I'm going to be direct.
[15:56] Sekine
    If you get eaten tonight,
    will you regret it then?
[15:58] Tsubasa
    That's too direct, Sekine!
SIGN    Eek!
SIGN    Eek!
[16:01] Tsubasa
    Aw, jeez, you're such a prude!
[16:03] Sekine
    Well, I guess she's dying tonight.
[16:07] Sekine
    No, this is where I have to draw the line.
[16:10] Sekine
    But how do I put a stop to this?
[16:16] Narrator
    Pipi-de-pop-de-poo.
[16:20] Sekine
    She must have spores on her.
[16:22] Sekine
    I wonder if removing them would do it.
[16:24] Sekine
    Ah.
[16:26] Sekine
    This is one of those things where
    I have to take care of Fuku-chan,
[16:29] Sekine
    or else more will fall prey.
[16:31] Tsubasa
    Are you all right, Sekine?
[16:38] Sekine
    Sorry, Tsubasa. You're going to be bait.
[16:47] Sekine
    Is Fuku-chan coming?
[16:51] Sekine
    Oh, it's Chiyo-san.
[16:53] Chiyo
    I'm a bit scared, but I'll tell
    that god-knows-who what's what!
[16:59] Chiyo
    You must arrange a meeting between
    both families before anything else!
SIGN    God-knows-who
SIGN    Wahh
SIGN    Rawr
[17:02] God-knows-who
    Y-Yes!
[17:05] Chiyo
    I've trained for this, in my mind!
[17:09] Chiyo
    Here he is!
[17:17] Sekine
    Isn't that the guy that talked to me? Why?
[17:30] Narrator
    There were more.
[17:35] Sekine
    Huh?
[17:37] Sekine
    Where'd he go?
[17:39] Sekine
    The only explanation for
    this bizarre situation...
[17:42] Sekine
    is that Fuku-chan must be there!
[17:47] Sleazy guy
    Come on, baby.
    Let's spend a hot night together.
[17:52] Chiyo
    Tsubasa-san, is this your type?
[17:57] Chiyo
    I must regretfully decline...
[18:00] Sekine
    Maybe Chiyo-san is seeing her ideal partner?
[18:05] Sekine
    But why does she seem troubled?
[18:08] Sekine
    Why isn't she liking it?
[18:09] Chiyo
    Um, are you Tsubasa-san's f-friend?
[18:15] Narrator
    Her art turned to shit due to stress.
[18:17] Sekine
    What should I do? I can't help her
    if I can't see anything.
[18:21] Sekine
    If only I had some sort of special power...
[18:24] Sekine
    Wait, I do!
[18:26] Narrator
    Mistress Time:
[18:28] Narrator
    Sekine gains the ability
    to completely control her powers.
[18:33] Sekine
    But if I use it...
[18:36] Sekine
    No, I have to save my friends!
[18:41] Sekine
    Sekine Eye!
[18:44] Narrator
    Allow me to explain!
[18:46] Narrator
    Sekine is seeing what Chiyo is seeing!
[18:52] Sekine
    That must be Fuku-chan, I guess.
[18:55] Sekine
    I'm glad I sacrificed my belly for this.
[18:58] Sekine
    But seriously, that's like,
    a sleazy dude from an adult manga.
[19:03] Sekine
    Is that Chiyo-san's type?
[19:07] Sleazy guy
    Ah, I get it. Okay, okay.
[19:09] Sleazy guy
    You're Tsuba-chan's friend, huh?
[19:12] Sleazy guy
    You're, like, so much more my type
    than her, you know.
[19:17] Chiyo
    Please stay away from Tsubasa-san...
[19:21] Chiyo
    P-Please...
[19:26] Sleazy guy
    In that case, how 'bout ya keep me company
    instead of Tsuba-chan?
[19:31] Sekine
    What's going on?
[19:33] Sekine
    Could it be that...
SIGN    No chance to procreate!
[19:35] Sekine
    Fuku-chan doesn't necessarily
    show you your ideal partner,
[19:39] Sekine
    but just shows whatever illusion has the
    best chance of resulting in procreation?
SIGN    Slight chance
    to procreate!
[19:45] Chiyo
    Will you promise never
    to see Tsubasa-san again?
[19:47] Sleazy guy
    You got it, toots!
[19:51] Chiyo
    Understood...
[19:53] Chiyo
    Let's just kill him.
[19:54] Sekine
    Guess that figures.
[19:57] Chiyo
    But I vowed to never take a life...
[20:01] Chiyo
    Will I go the way of the demon?
[20:03] Sleazy guy
    Come on, let's go.
[20:05] Sleazy guy
    Let's get it on alone!
[20:07] Chiyo
    I'm scared!
[20:09] Narrator
    Of her own killer instinct.
[20:11] Sekine
    Chiyo-san!
[20:13] Rikka
    That won't do.
[20:16] Rikka
    You're a naughty one.
[20:20] Sekine
    You're awesome, Colonel!
    Though it was your fault to begin with!
[20:24] Chiyo
    Oh, where did that man go?
[20:26] Rikka
    I called the authorities!
    He probably ran off.
[20:30] Rikka
    But who would have thought he would actually
    try to procreate using Earthlings...
[20:42] Tsubasa
    Huh? What are you all doing here?
[20:46] Rikka
    There's no other way.
[20:49] Rikka
    Exterminate!
[20:56] Tsubasa
    What is this?!
[21:04] Rikka
    Good!
[21:08] Tsubasa
    What is?
SIGN    Inaseya Supermarket
SIGN    Fresh!!
SIGN    Fresh!!
SIGN    Super Sale!! Mushroom Festival
SIGN    Super Sale!! Mushroom Festival
SIGN    Niigata Produce
SIGN    King Trumpet Mushrooms
SIGN    78 yen per pack (82 yen with tax)
SIGN    Niigata Produce
SIGN    King Trumpet Mushrooms
SIGN    78 yen per pack (82 yen with tax)
[21:16] Hot guy 1
    You're cute.
[21:18] Hot guy 2
    I'll save you.
[21:22] Hot guy 3
    I missed you.
SIGN    Vegetables & Fruits
[21:24] Hot guy 4
    Are you all right?
[21:26] Hot guy 5
    I will care for you.
[21:27] Narrator
    An aftereffect of the spores is that king
    trumpet mushrooms look like hot guys to her.
[21:29] Hot guy 6
    You're so fine as always.
SIGN    Inaseya Supermarket
[21:32] Hot guy
    I love you.
[21:33] Narrator
    It went away after a while.
[21:36] Hot guy
    Bye-bye.
SIGN    Next Episode Preview
SIGN    Day Duty:
     Sekine
[23:09] Chiyo
    The hot-springs resort trip! I can't wait!
[23:12] Sekine
    Hot-spring boiled eggs and steamed buns!
[23:14] Rikka
    I want to wear a yukata, go to the
    shooting gallery, and play table tennis!
[23:17] Sekine
    Tsubasa, why aren't you excited?
[23:19] Tsubasa
    I totally am excited!
SIGN    #10: Atami
[23:20] Tsubasa
    I'm going to get shiny, smooth skin
    at the skin-beautifying hot spring!