E8 - The Adult Meat Chapter

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The Nonfictions
SIGN    The Girls Who Devoted Their Lives to Comedy
[00:01] Narrator
    A group of girls have devoted the
    shining days of their youth to comedy
SIGN    The Nonfictions
[00:06] Narrator
    for the Teppen Grand Prix.
[00:08] Narrator
    They spend their days pushing
    each other to reach for the top.
[00:13] Narrator
    Takahashi Yomogi-san's home
    is a takoyaki restaurant.
[00:17] Narrator
    Times are tough, and the shop is on
    the verge of going out of business.
[00:22] Narrator
    Hoping to pull it back from the brink, she is
    betting everything on the Teppen Grand Prix.
[00:26] Narrator
    When asked what she would do if another
    member held her back, she answered coolly.
[00:33] Yomogi
    If I can't use them, I gotta throw them out.
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show!!!
[00:36] Narrator
    Next weekend, the girls have decided
    to put on a live skit show.
[00:40] Narrator
    It will be a kind of prelude
    to the Grand Prix.
[00:43] Narrator
    They're stepping up their rehearsals.
[00:46] Narrator
    One member, Sakamoto Yayoi-san,
    is shaking with stress.
[00:50] Narrator
    But who could blame her?
[00:52] Narrator
    For girls with so little stage experience,
    this is a once-in-a-lifetime event.
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show
[00:59] Narrator
    On the day of the show,
    backstage became a battleground.
[01:04] Narrator
    The problems were endless,
    one after the next.
[01:08] Narrator
    Their first live skit show was a disaster.
[01:12] Narration
    When it was over, we asked
    the girls this question:
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show
SIGN    Do you like comedy?
SIGN    D
    O
    
    Y
    O
    U
    
    L
    I
    K
    E
    
    C
    O
    M
    E
    D
    Y
    ?
[01:18] Mako
    Of course I like it.
[01:19] Misao
    Yeah, I like it, too.
[01:21] Kana
    Definitely!
[01:22] Mone
    You could even say I love it.
[01:25] Chihori
    Even if I have to sacrifice
    something else for it.
[01:27] Yayoi
    Yeah! I love it!
[01:29] Narrator
    Their youth has only just begun.
[01:41] Yuzu
    What was that?
[01:44] [SONG] all
    Yeah!
[01:44] [SONG] Yomogi
    So, what's comedy?
[01:45] [SONG] Yayoi
    Yo!
[01:46] [SONG] Yuzu
    Tough question, for me
[01:47] [SONG] Yayoi
    What could it be?
    It's too far out to see!
[01:48] [SONG] Yuzu & Yomogi
    Be! See!
[01:49] [SONG] Yomogi
    Boke and tsukkomi, in the zone
[01:49] [SONG] Yayoi
    Ye ye, in the zone!
[01:51] [SONG] Yuzu
    We got god-tier jokes on the horizon
[01:51] [SONG] Yayoi & Yomogi
    God! Horizon!
[01:53] [SONG] Kana
    Wanna see us split into bunshin
[01:53] [SONG] Iroha & Chitose
    Yeah!
[01:54] [SONG] Iroha & Chitose
    Bullets!
[01:54] [SONG] Kana
    And hear gags flying at you like bullets?
[01:56] [SONG] Kana
    Leave it to comedy ninjas!
[01:57] [SONG] Iroha & Chitose
    Nin-nin!
[01:57] [SONG] Saeka
    High society, celebrity
[01:57] [SONG] Hikari & Mako
    High! Celebrity!
[01:59] [SONG] Saeka
    The cleanest jokes are our priority
[02:00] [SONG] Hikari & Mako
    Priority!
[02:02] [SONG] Miyu
    Yeah, Akudare, making you all laugh
[02:02] [SONG] Hina & Misao
    Yeah!
[02:03] [SONG] Hina & Misao
    Ah! Ah!
[02:04] [SONG] Miyu
    Conquerors from Earth to heaven and back
[02:04] [SONG] Hina & Misao
    Conquerors from Earth to heaven and back!
[02:06] [SONG] Yuina
    We. Are. The. Invaders. Yo.
[02:07] [SONG] Chihori & Mone
    Ah Invaders
[02:08] [SONG] Chihori & Mone
    That should tell you all you need to know
[02:09] [SONG] Chihori & Mone
    Need to know!
[02:10] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Yeah!
[02:10] [SONG] Yuzu
    Shake it up, Wai-Wai!
[02:10] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Wai-Wai!
[02:11] [SONG] Yomogi
    Heat up the timeline!
[02:11] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Timeline!
[02:12] [SONG] Yayoi
    Scramble for the win,
    we won't give up our pride
[02:14] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Pride!
[02:15] [SONG] Yomogi
    Found a new line
[02:15] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Oh!
[02:15] [SONG] Yuzu
    Gonna sweep the prime time
[02:16] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Oh!
[02:16] [SONG] Yayoi
    Who's on top then?
[02:18] [SONG] all Young Wai-Wai
    Gotta take the Teppen!
[02:18] [SONG] Kana; Saeka; Miyu; Yuina
    Take it to the top
[02:20] [SONG] all call
    Doin' it for real!
[02:21] [SONG] Kana; Saeka
    We'll show you, giving everything
     we got, oh yeah
[02:22] [SONG] all call
    Oh yeah
[02:23] [SONG] Miyu; Yuina
    Gonna face the challenge head-on
[02:23] [SONG] all call
    Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
[02:25] [SONG] Kana; Saeka; Miyu; Yuina
    Running straight ahead
[02:25] [SONG] all call
    Yo! Yo! Yo!
[02:27] [SONG] Young Wai-Wai
    Take it to the top
[02:27] [SONG] all call
    Yeah that's right!
[02:29] [SONG] Young Wai-Wai
    It's show
[02:30] [SONG] Yomogi
    Don't slow down to hear them
     call you funny, not a day
[02:32] [SONG] Yuzu
    You'll never reach the top that way
[02:32] [SONG] all call
    Ah! Ah! Ah! Oh yeah!
[02:34] [SONG] Yayoi
    You know it's true, what we say
[02:36] [SONG] all call
    Hey!
[02:37] [SONG] all sing
    But this isn't about us just getting a laugh
[02:40] [SONG] all call
    Yeah! Yeah!
[02:43] [SONG] all sing
    That's not why we're here
    It's much bigger, bigger than all that
[02:46] [SONG] all call
    All that
[02:47] [SONG] all sing
    We want to get
[02:47] [SONG] all call
    We want to get, yeah!
[02:50] [SONG] all sing
    At last the genuine reason
     we're living in this world
[02:50] [SONG] all call
    At last the genuine reason
     we're living in this world
[02:55] [SONG] all sing
    Yeah if we are the ones
    that are making you laugh
[02:55] [SONG] all call
    Ye! Ye! Ye! Ye! Ye! Ye! Ye! Ye!
[03:00] [SONG] all sing
    We gotta go so hard it'll really,
     really give us that, you know?
[03:04] [SONG] all sing
    Top of the laugh
[03:04] [SONG] all call
    Top of the laugh Ye~ah!
[03:07] [SONG] all sing
    At last we're gonna give it our all, our way.
    We're gonna make it to the top one day!
[03:07] [SONG] all call
    At last we're gonna give it our all, our way,
     oh! We're gonna make it to the top one day!
[03:12] [SONG] Yayoi
    Aw yeah!
[03:14] Yuzu
    What was that?
SIGN    The Adult Meat Chapter
[03:20] All
    A documentary program?
[03:22] Seiji
    Yeah. For a week starting tomorrow,
    we'll have a camera following us.
[03:28] Yomogi
    He's already here!
[03:29] Yuzu
    Isn't this all just a little too sudden?
[03:31] Seiji
    The program made an offer to the
    Teppen Grand Prix Committee.
[03:35] Seiji
    I responded and asked them to
    please cover us in detail.
[03:39] Yayoi
    Why?
[03:40] Seiji
    How much do you think it cost to repair
    Takako-so after you reduced it to ruins?
[03:45] Seiji
    You'd better make yourself useful!
[03:47] Yuzu
    There's nothing we can say to that.
[03:50] Misao
    You want to show us as we
    are and won't interfere?
[03:55] Hina
    You aren't going to tell us to do things?
[03:58] Hina
    But isn't that what TV is like?
[04:00] Mako
    Yeah, yeah.
[04:02] Chitose
    So you're saying you want to
    record us acting naturally?
[04:07] Hikari
    Why isn't he talking, though?
[04:12] Seiji
    Yeah, that's it! Give those quads some love!
[04:15] Seiji
    Pump up! Pump up!
[04:17] Seiji
    Come on, get with it! Did you
    forget we're being filmed?
[04:21] Chihori
    But he told us to act normally.
[04:23] Mako
    I'd like to take all this more seriously,
     but I guess we gotta act normal.
[04:29] Seiji
    Well, if that's how you're
    gonna be, then I have my own idea.
[04:32] Seiji
    Eat this!
[04:34] Mako & Chihori
    So spicy!
[04:38] Seiji
    I thought this might happen, so I loaded up
    with super-spicy rounds to punish you.
[04:43] Seiji
    If you screw around,
    I'll stuff you full of them!
[04:46] All
    Eek!
[04:47] All
    Macho! Macho! Macho! Macho!
[04:50] Seiji
    Doesn't it feel great
    to break a fresh sweat?
[04:53] Chitose
    No part of this is great!
[04:56] Yomogi
    I'm so worn out.
[04:58] Yuzu
    Seiji-san got really fired up.
[05:01] Yayoi
    Yeah.
[05:02] Yayoi
    Oh?
[05:06] Yayoi
    Is this for a concert or something?
[05:08] Worker
    What?! But we've already built it!
[05:11] Worker
    Please, you can't be serious!
[05:12] Yuzu
    Did something happen?
[05:15] Worker
    Three days from now, a cable idol group
    was supposed to have a concert here.
SIGN    LAN-neechan
SIGN    USBmi
SIGN    HDMIko
SIGN    The Cables
[05:20] Yomogi
    A cable idol group?
SIGN    LAN-neechan
SIGN    LAN-neechan
SIGN    USBmi
[05:21] Worker
    But they all got caught in relationships.
SIGN    The Cables Hook Up
[05:24] Worker
    They were dating boys from a PC idol group.
[05:27] Yomogi
    Sounds like they were compatible.
[05:29] Worker
    Now the concert's been canceled, after we
    went through the trouble of building a stage.
[05:34] Yuzu
    A-ha! In that case...!
[05:36] Yayoi & Yomogi
    Huh?
[05:38] Yayoi
    Ta-dah!
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show!!!
[05:40] Iroha
    "Takako-so Live Skit Show"?
[05:42] Yayoi
    Yeah! Do you want to invite our neighbors
    and do a live show in three days?
[05:47] Yuzu
    There are so many of us
    aspiring comedians here.
[05:50] Yuzu
    Wouldn't it be fun to
    do a skit all together?
[05:53] Kana
    That's a great idea!
[05:55] Chitose
    A group skit! Yeah.
    It'll be good practice, too!
[05:58] Yayoi
    Let's do it, then! It's settled!
[06:00] Yayoi
    Let's start rehearsing!
[06:02] Misao
    Rehearse when we don't
    even know what we're doing?
[06:05] Misao
    We need a script first.
[06:07] Yuzu
    We already have one.
[06:08] Miyu
    So quick!
[06:09] Yuzu
    I'm always jotting down ideas.
[06:11] Yuzu
    I took one of them and
    fleshed it out a little.
[06:14] Yuzu
    I still haven't decided much
    outside of the main plot, though.
[06:17] Yuina
    It's based on Cinderella.
[06:19] Hikari
    Funny rewrites of fairy tales
    always work great for skits.
[06:23] Yayoi
    How do we pick the roles?
[06:25] Yomogi
    Well, I guess we could let people pick first
    and then draw straws for any that overlap.
[06:29] Yuzu
    Have any of you chosen a role?
[06:31] Miyu
    Me!
[06:31] Miyu
    You know the role I'm gonna play...
[06:34] Miyu
    The role of Komon-sama!
[06:36] Yuzu
    He's not in this.
[06:37] Miyu
    Doesn't matter!
[06:38] Miyu
    Just write a new character into the skit!
[06:41] Miyu
    I'll be Komon-sama. Misao and Hina
    will be Suke-san and Kaku-san.
[06:44] Miyu
    And Kana'll be our Pinwheel Yahachi.
[06:46] Kana
    Me too?
[06:47] Miyu
    Don't try to hide it!
[06:48] Miyu
    I know you secretly want to
    join Akudare to be Yahachi.
[06:51] Miyu
    The pinwheel you're always
    wearing is the proof!
[06:54] Kana
    I-I never even realized!
[06:57] Kana
    I had the blood of Akudare... of Ibaraki
     running through my veins!
[07:02] Kana
    Could it be I'm a member of a warrior race
    sent from Ibaraki to destroy all of Kansai?
[07:08] Hina
    Not everybody from Ibaraki
     is part of a warrior race.
[07:10] Hina
    That's just Misao.
[07:12] Misao
    I ain't one, either!
[07:13] Yayoi
    Does anyone else have a
    role they want to play?
[07:16] Mone
    I guess I'll be part of the space police.
[07:18] Yuzu
    That's not in this!
[07:19] Mako
    I want to be an IT company president!
[07:20] Yuzu
    You can't!
[07:21] Saeka
    There's no IT company to have
     a president in Cinderella.
[07:23] Saeka
    You could at least be the day trader
    living in the chateau's attic.
[07:27] Yuzu
    Weirdos aren't allowed to live there!
[07:32] Yuzu
    Here are the roles, then.
SIGN    ○ Cinderella
SIGN    Yayoi
SIGN    ○ Prince
SIGN    Yomogi
SIGN    ○ Fairy Godmother
SIGN    Yuzu
SIGN    ○ Stepmother
SIGN    Saeka
SIGN    ○ Fairy Godmother's Helpers
SIGN    Mako, Miyu, Mone
[07:34] Chitose
    Hold it!
[07:35] Yuzu
    What's wrong?
[07:36] Chitose
    What the heck is this "trashy
    Kansai folks" stuff?!
SIGN    ○ Other Extra
SIGN    ○ Other Etcetera
SIGN    ○ Trashy Kansai Folks at the Ball
SIGN    Kana, Chitose, Iroha
SIGN    ○ Other
[07:39] Yayoi
    Ooh! You're really getting
    into the role, Chitose-chan!
[07:42] Chitose
    I ain't acting yet!
[07:43] Mako
    The fairy godmother's helpers, huh?
[07:45] Miyu
    I'd rather be Komon-sama,
    but I guess this is okay.
[07:48] Yuzu
    First, the scene where you bully
    Cinderella to the breaking point.
[07:51] Saeka
    I'm not sure that I'll be able
    to say such mean things.
SIGN    Wicked Stepmother Role
[07:54] Mako
    Go for it, Saeka!
[07:56] Yuzu
    Okay, start!
[07:57] Yayoi
    Stepmother...
[07:59] Yayoi
    Eek!
[07:59] Saeka
    You deserve no more than a maggot's
    scraps stewed in sewage.
[08:04] Saeka
    I'll tear your revolting body apart, piece
    by piece, and feed you to the rats!
[08:09] Yayoi
    Eek!
[08:12] Saeka
    What did you think?
[08:16] Yuzu
    I-It was really good, but you sounded
    more murderous than wicked.
[08:22] Yuzu
    Do you think you can lighten it up a little?
[08:24] Saeka
    I'm sorry! This is so out
    of character for me.
[08:27] Saeka
    Please let me try again.
[08:29] Yuzu
    Okay, start!
[08:30] Yayoi
    S-Stepmother...
[08:34] Saeka
    Don't you dare push your luck
    with me, you little .
[08:36] Saeka
    You made a mistake leaving
    the ******** you came from.
[08:39] Saeka*
    You'll wish you'd swam up a -filled
    * and crawled back up some 's .
[08:47] Saeka
    Was that better?
[08:51] Hikari
    Saeka's hobby is watching movies.
[08:54] Chitose*
    She must be into some real dark stuff.
SIGN    Fairy Godmother's Helper A
[08:56] Mako
    Cinderella's outfit has got
    to have a tea leaf pattern.
[09:00] Miyu
    You can't decide that yourself!
     It's gotta be a clam design!
SIGN    Fairy Godmother's Helper B
[09:03] Mone
    No! Tentacles, like from a Martian!
SIGN    Fairy Godmother's Helper C
[09:06] Miyu
    Clam design! Clam design!
[09:06] Mako
    Tea leaves would be way cuter!
[09:06] Mone
    A space design is the best!
[09:09] Yuzu
    This is the scene where they fight over
    how to dress Cinderella for the ball...
[09:14] Yomogi
    But it needs more impact.
[09:16] Misao
    Fine, then.
[09:17] Misao
    I'll coach the actors!
[09:20] Mako
    I'll be the one to decide
    Cinderella's outfit!
[09:25] Miyu
    No, I will!
[09:29] Mone
    Is that so? I'll settle this.
[09:36] Yomogi
    They're getting pretty physical
    for a fairy's helpers.
[09:39] Yuzu
    It does have more impact...
[09:41] Yuzu
    But this isn't the right kind.
[09:46] Yomogi
    Our manager usually takes care of meals
    for us, but sometimes I help out, too.
[09:52] Yomogi
    Oh, this? I'm cutting off
    the parts you can't eat.
[09:56] Yomogi
    If I can't use them, I gotta throw them out.
[09:59] Yayoi
    It looks great!
[10:00] Yayoi
    Did you clean the fish
    yourself, Yomogi? Thanks!
[10:03] Kana
    Yo! Way to commit piscicide!
[10:05] Yomogi
    Don't say it like that!
[10:06] Iroha
    Fish is full of DHA. I want to eat it
    more because it lowers LDL cholesterol.
[10:12] Chitose
    Could you hold off on the fitness
    talk while we're eating?
[10:16] Chitose
    I feel like I'm being sprinkled with guilt.
[10:18] Miyu
    Yeah, like when you're eating yakisoba
    and you see someone in dreads,
[10:21] Miyu
    and you want to sprinkle
    dried seaweed on them?
[10:23] Chitose
    That's different.
[10:24] Saeka
    Yes, that's true. I also
    love fish. And meat? Well...
[10:29] Mako
    Of course I like it!
[10:31] Misao
    Yeah, I like it, too.
[10:32] Kana
    Definitely!
[10:34] Mone
    You could even say I love it.
[10:36] Chihori
    I love eating it. Even if I have to
    sacrifice something else for it.
[10:39] Yuina
    You sound a little too ready to.
[10:42] Seiji
    All right, all right.
    Stop talking and eat up.
[10:46] Seiji
    We get started on the show early tomorrow!
[10:48] All
    Okay!
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show!!!
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show!!!
[11:17] Miyu
    What?!
[11:19] Miyu
    The costumes aren't here yet?!
[11:21] Misao
    There was a traffic jam,
    and the truck is late.
[11:25] Yuzu
    It made it! The truck just arrived.
[11:27] Miyu
    All right!
[11:28] Chitose
    It barely made it!
[11:30] Hikari
    These are the costumes for Cinderella?
[11:32] Yuzu
    It looks like they messed up and sent us
    a superhero stage show's costumes instead.
[11:36] Yomogi
    How could they mix those up?!
[11:37] Mone
    We can't do Cinderella in these.
[11:41] Yayoi
    Let's do it!
[11:43] Yuzu
    Yayoi?
[11:44] Yayoi
    Let's do Cinderella in these costumes!
[11:46] Yayoi
    I know we can pull it off!
[11:48] Misao
    Only 10 minutes until curtain,
    with a full house.
[11:51] Yayoi
    Let's give it a shot! If we cancel,
    the guests will all be disappointed.
[11:55] Yuina
    But these costumes are totally wrong!
[11:58] Yayoi
    So let's turn that into a joke!
[12:00] Yomogi
    Yeah. Let's take advantage of this
    accident to make the audience laugh!
[12:04] Yomogi
    I know we're up to it!
[12:06] Yomogi
    Right, Yuzu?
[12:07] Yuzu
    All right. I'll adjust the script.
[12:10] Chitose
    Right now? But that's impossible!
[12:12] Yuzu
    I'll do it because it's impossible.
[12:14] Yuzu
    A trapped flower always blossoms.
[12:16] Yuzu
    That's what comedy is!
[12:20] Kana
    Yeah, you're right. Let's do it!
[12:21] Saeka
    That is true.
[12:23] Miyu
    Let's do this!
[12:24] Chitose
    We've gotta try!
[12:25] Mako
    Let's do it!
[12:25] Iroha
    Let's do it!
[12:28] Yayoi
    All right then, all together!
[12:30] Yayoi
    Let's give it a shot!
[12:31] All
    Yeah!
SIGN    Teppen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show
[12:37] Hina
    Thank you for waiting. We will now
    begin the Takako-so Live Skit Show.
[12:43] Hina
    Please enjoy it to the end.
[12:45] Hina
    A long, long time ago, there was a
    pure-hearted girl named Cinderella.
[12:50] Yayoi
    Phew. Another day of cleaning.
[12:54] Hina
    Cinderella was a spider monster.
[12:56] Yayoi
    How'd these spider webs get here?
[12:58] Yayoi
    Who did it?
[12:59] Yayoi
    Oh. Me! Ha ha ha!
[13:02] Hina
    Cinderella had three mean older sisters.
[13:06] Hina
    The oldest was a
    praying mantis monster.
[13:08] Saeka
    Oh my, Cinderella. Haven't you
     finished cleaning yet?
[13:12] Hina
    The second was a turtle monster.
[13:14] Hikari
    You sure are slow, huh?
[13:19] Hina
    And the third was a lady from Kansai.
[13:21] Chitose
    Yer pissin' me off!
[13:23] Yayoi
    I am sorry, my sisters.
[13:25] Yayoi
    The chateau is filled with spider webs,
    and it is taking a long time to clean.
[13:31] Saeka
    I don't want to hear your excuses.
[13:32] Chitose
    Yer pissin' me off!
[13:34] Hikari
    You're almost as slow as a turtle.
[13:37] Chitose
    Yer pissin' me off!
[13:40] Kana
    I'm done!
SIGN    Happily Ever After
[13:41] Kana
    You think this'll work?
[13:44] Yuzu
    Yeah. Now we put it in the confetti
    ball and break it open at the end.
[13:47] Yuina
    Isn't that a little forced, though?
[13:49] Kana
    Oh, I'm sure it'll work out.
[13:51] Miyu
    What the heck?!
[13:53] Miyu
    Where did our parts go?
[13:56] Mako
    Where are the godmother's helpers?
[13:57] Yuzu
    I'm so sorry. With all the script
    adjustments, there just wasn't time...
[14:01] Mone
    Don't take away my role! I wanna act, too!
[14:03] Miyu & Mako
    Me too! Me too!
[14:05] Hina
    The three mean sisters
    left Cinderella behind,
[14:07] Yuzu
    Oh, no! I'm up!
[14:08] Hina
    and went to the ball at the castle.
[14:08] Yuzu
    I'm really sorry!
[14:10] All three
    Hey!
[14:11] All three
    Hmph!
[14:14] Mako
    If that's how it is...
[14:16] Hina
    Cinderella was left all alone.
[14:19] Hina
    Even though she wanted to
    dance with the prince, too.
[14:24] Yayoi
    Who are you?
[14:26] Yuzu
    My name is Professor Yuzu.
[14:28] Yuzu
    Spider Monster, do you want power?
[14:31] Yayoi
    No, I want to go to the ball!
[14:34] Yuzu
    Then I shall give you power. There!
[14:36] Yayoi
    Oh, gee!
[14:38] Yuina
    Nope, the music isn't playing.
    I wonder if the speakers are broken.
[14:43] Misao
    It's gonna be real dull without music.
[14:45] Iroha
    If we at least had something
    for the climax...
[14:47] Misao
    Okay, then. We'll go looking.
[14:49] Iroha
    We just need some kind
     of instruments, right?
[14:53] Yuina
    Huh? Hey, wait!
[14:55] Yuina
    This really isn't gonna work!
[14:58] Hina
    And then, right as the ball was beginning...
[15:02] Yomogi
    I am the prince. I have a feeling I will
    have a fateful encounter at tonight's ball.
[15:08] Saeka
    Oh, you're so handsome, Prince Red.
[15:11] Saeka
    I wonder if you might dance with me.
[15:13] Chitose
    Yer pissin' me off!
[15:16] Saeka
    Could that possibly be...
[15:18] Saeka; Chitose
    Cinderella!
[15:18] Hikari
    Cinderella...
[15:20] Yomogi
    How beautiful!
[15:22] Yayoi
    Oh, Prince!
[15:23] Yomogi
    I am Prince Red. May I ask
    you to dance with me?
[15:28] Yayoi
    Yes, with pleasure!
[15:35] Yuzu
    Mm-hmm. Good scene.
    If we can keep this up...
[15:38] Chihori
    Hey, do we have glass slippers?
[15:40] Yuzu & Yuina
    Oh!
[15:41] Yuzu
    Wh-Wh-What do we do?
[15:46] Yayoi
    I have to go.
[15:48] Yomogi
    Wait! At least tell me your name.
[15:52] Yayoi
    I'm sorry!
[15:57] Yomogi
    This must give me a hint as to who she is.
[16:00] Yuzu
    That's what you went with?
[16:01] Yuzu
    I've never heard of a Cinderella who
    leaves a spider leg at the ball!
[16:05] Yuina
    But it's all I had!
[16:07] Chihori
    I've never heard of a spider
    monster Cinderella to begin with.
[16:12] Mako
    We have taken over the ball!
[16:15] Miyu
    Be smart, and follow our orders!
[16:17] Mone
    Or we'll shoot you with laser beams!
[16:19] Yuzu
    What are they doing?!
[16:20] Yomogi
    Who do you think you are?! I mean,
    there's no scene like this in the script!
[16:24] Mako
    Shut up!
[16:26] Mako
    We don't care about the script.
[16:27] Mako
    We wanted parts, too!
[16:29] Mone
    Yeah! Yeah!
[16:31] Miyu
    From here on, it's an evil fairy tale!
[16:33] Miyu
    We're the rulers of this land now!
[16:36] Yuzu
    This is a total mess!
[16:37] Yuina
    Wh-What should we do?
[16:41] Iroha
    That sound...
[16:43] Misao
    Oh!
[16:49] Mako
    Prince, here I come!
[16:54] Yomogi
    K-Kansai lady!
[16:57] Chitose
    Don't lay a hand on my sister's man!
     Yer pissin' me off!
[17:03] Chitose
    Croak...
[17:04] All four
    Oh!
[17:05] Hikari
    Wide open!
[17:10] Saeka
    If you lay a hand on my little sister's
    boyfriend, this praying mantis monster...
[17:14] Hikari
    ...and this turtle monster...
[17:15] Saeka & Hikari
    ...will never forgive you!
[17:15] Saeka & Hikari
    ...will never forgive you!
[17:17] Mako
    What is this?
[17:18] Saeka
    It's for ignoring the script
    and starting trouble!
[17:20] Mako
    With a joint loc—
[17:22] Mako
    Ow! I give up!
[17:23] Yayoi
    Oh? What's going to happen next?
[17:25] Hikari
    We've got to bring it back somehow,
    so the story doesn't fall apart!
[17:29] Saeka
    We have to bring it to a happy ending.
[17:31] Hikari & Saeka
    But we don't have a plan!
[17:33] Mako
    Ouch! Ouch!
[17:35] Yuzu
    I bet everyone on stage is improvising.
[17:37] Yuzu
    What should we do?
[17:38] Yuina
    I love these wild plot twists so much.
[17:40] Yuzu
    Yuina-chan?
[17:42] Yuina
    I gotta... I gotta...
[17:44] Yuina
    I'm on fire, y'all!
[17:46] Yuzu; Yayoi; Chihori
    Huh?!
[17:48] Yuina
    Cosmos Power!
[17:54] Yuina
    Don't you see what's happening?
[17:56] Yuina
    Your sisters are fighting for your sake!
[18:00] Yuina
    Are you too scared to come out?
[18:01] Yuina
    Are you scared the prince
    will find out who you are?
[18:04] Yuina
    None of that matters one bit!
[18:06] Yuina
    You are who you are!
[18:08] Saeka
    I've never seen this side of her.
[18:09] Mone
    Yuina gets like this sometimes.
[18:12] Mako
    She does, huh?
[18:15] Yomogi
    Yayo—I mean, it's you!
[18:18] Yomogi
    Thank you, my sisters. I...
[18:21] Yomogi
    I'm glad I was born as a monster!
[18:25] Yayoi
    Take this! Cinderella Spider Cannon!
[18:31] Yuina
    Here, use this.
[18:35] Yomogi
    A perfect fit! It's you, from the ball!
[18:39] Yayoi
    I'm Cinderella. As you can see,
     I'm a spider monster.
[18:43] Yomogi
    That doesn't matter! Marry me now!
[18:47] Yayoi
    Even... as a spider monster?
[18:51] Yomogi
    Even... as a spider monster.
[18:58] Yayoi
    Prince Red!
[19:00] Yomogi
    Spider Monster!
[19:08] Hina
    And the two lovers lived happily ever after.
[19:18] Hina
    And the two lovers lived happily ever after...
[19:24] Kana
    Huh?
[19:29] Yayoi
    Huh?
[19:31] Chihori
    The confetti ball...
[19:32] Yuzu
    It isn't opening!
[19:39] Kana
    In that case...
[19:44] Kana
    Jump!
[19:46] Kana
    Ooh... Whoa!
[19:55] Yayoi & Yomogi
    Aah!
[20:07] Yayoi & Yomogi
    Ouch!
SIGN    Happily Ever After
SIGN    Unedited Footage
[20:24] Mako
    The video they gave us is totally
    different from what they aired!
[20:27] Chitose
    The edits are so misleading, too!
[20:30] Yomogi
    Why'd they say my shop was
    going out of business?
[20:32] Misao
    He said he wanted to film us as we are,
    but never said they wouldn't edit it.
[20:37] Miyu
    It ain't right!
[20:38] Mone
    This isn't the real us at all.
     We should complain!
[20:41] Yuina
    Yeah, let's!
[20:43] Seiji
    Oh, my. Was the program not to your liking?
[20:46] Seiji
    A while ago, before it aired,
[20:48] Seiji
    the Teppen Grand Prix Committee called
    and told me they were shown the video.
[20:53] Seiji
    The edited version, of course.
[20:56] Seiji
    They said it was very moving.
[20:58] Seiji
    The story of girls struggling and fighting
    for comedy with all their strength
[21:02] Seiji
    really touched their hearts, they said.
[21:04] Chitose
    They were moved by this?
    That doesn't make me happy at all.
[21:07] Seiji
    Oh, really?
[21:08] Seiji
    Even though they sent you a nice reward?
[21:11] Mako
    We don't want a reward for that!
     Send it straight back!
[21:14] Seiji
    Oh my.
[21:15] Seiji
    But you've already eaten it all.
[21:17] Yuzu
    What do you mean?
[21:19] Seiji
    That high-quality sukiyaki
    meat was your reward.
[21:22] All three
    Huh?!
[21:26] Mako
    The meat... was delicious.
[21:29] Chitose
    I guess that's what being
     an adult tastes like.
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show
SIGN    Takako-so Live Skit Show
[21:43] (Flashback) Yomogi
    Oh! You all came?
[21:45] (Flashback) Yuzu
    What did you think?
[21:47] (Flashback) Miki
    It was really funny!
[21:47] (Flashback) Rine
    It was funny!
[21:48] (Flashback) Yuzu
    Thank you.
[21:50] (Flashback) Yayoi
    Yoshihiro, it's been a while!
[21:52] (Flashback) Yayoi
    Thanks for coming. Did you like it?
[21:54] (Flashback) Yoshihiro
    It looked like you three
    were really having fun.
[21:56] (Flashback) Yoshihiro
    You really do like comedy, don't you?
[21:59] (Flashback) Yayoi
    Yeah! I love it!
[22:04] [SONG] Lead
    Go! We want to live life to
    the fullest. Yeah, we're serious!
[22:09] [SONG] back
    Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat Teppen!
[22:16] [SONG] lead
    Hi! Hi! Hello! Let's get
    on with the show today.
[22:19] [SONG] lead
    We've just got four minutes, but we
    hope you hear everything that we say.
[22:22] [SONG] back
    Hey there cutie, hey there cutie,
    didn't even miss a beat there, cutie.
[22:24] [SONG] lead
    We hope you enjoy the show today.
[22:27] [SONG] lead
    Here at home with you, in your living room,
     we'll put a twinkle into your eyes.
[22:33] [SONG] lead
    We've all dreamed to see if we could be
    on a stage so free. Now it's a reality!
[22:42] [SONG] lead
    Keep laughing! Keep laughing! Ha-ha-ing!
[22:45] [SONG] lead
    It's all good when we're laughing together.
[22:48] [SONG] lead
    If we bomb, slip, even if we cry,
    so what! That's still part of our destiny.
[22:53] [SONG] lead
    Keep laughing! Keep laughing! Ha-ha-ing!
[22:56] [SONG] lead
    We'll hit it big if we
    keep laughing together.
[22:59] [SONG] lead
    We never knew that life
    could ever be like this,
[23:02] [SONG] lead
    and now that we're going, you know
    there's no way we'll ever stop!
[23:05] [SONG] lead
    We want to live life to
    the fullest. Yeah, we're serious!
[23:09] [SONG] back
    Rat-tat-tat-tat-tat Teppen!
[23:10] [SONG] lead
    All of our searching, all of our
    training is fading out into the past.
[23:16] [SONG] lead
    But to us now, those memories
    will always be so precious.
[23:22] [SONG] lead
    All of the tears, all of the pain,
    rewriting life with our own words.
[23:27] [SONG] lead
    We want to laugh it all away with you,
    right up to the end. And that's a wrap!
SIGN    The Adamski Chapter