7 - Vigne's Demonic Life

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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    A Day Off
SIGN    Trash Station
SIGN    Keep it neat!
    Please put your trash out by 8:30 AM
    on your designated collection days.
[00:37] Vigne
    Through the Dark Lord. Amen.
[00:52] Boy A
    Ready?
[00:54] Boy B
    Ready!
[01:02] Boy A
    Sorry!
[01:04] Boy B
    Could you get that ball for us?
[01:12] Boy A
    Jeez, lady! Throw a homer, will you?
[01:15] Vigne
    Sorry!
[01:17] Boy B
    Right, keep your elbow up and out.
[01:19] Boy B
    Don't stand straight up. Lean a bit forward.
[01:22] Boy B
    Okay, now throw.
[01:25] Boy A
    Throw a homer, will you?
[01:27] Vigne
    Sorry.
[01:42] Gab
    Shoot, I missed the start
    of the holiday quest.
[01:51] Vigne
    Through the Dark Lord. Amen.
SIGN    11/2 Gab was as irresponsible as ever today. I still can't believe she graduated at the top of her class at angel school.
SIGN    11/3 Breakfast: Toast Bacon & eggs Vegetable juice Lunch (in the park) Consommé soup
[02:31] Vigne narr
    Today was another great day.
[02:52] Girls narr
    Huh?!
[02:53] Girls narr
    My stipend went down again*?!
SIGN    Episode 7 Vigne's Demonic Life
[04:28] Raphiel
    What's the matter?
[04:30] Raphiel
    You seem somewhat out of spirit.
[04:33] Vigne
    My stipends from Hell keep decreasing.
[04:37] Raphiel
    Because you don't do anything demonic,
    despite being a demon?
[04:41] Vigne
    Y-Yeah. I think so.
[04:44] Raphiel
    Well, perhaps you could start
    by dressing in a way that raises Hell?
[04:51] Vigne
    Th-That's a good idea.
[04:54] Raphiel
    I have something oh-so-beastly
    that you can try.
[04:57] Vigne
    Really?
[04:58] Vigne
    Thanks!
[05:04] Vigne
    What is this?
SIGN    Oh, so... beastly.
[05:05] Raphiel
    Oh, so... beastly.
[05:07] Raphiel
    Oh-so-beastly.
SIGN    Oh-so-beastly.
[05:09] Raphiel
    Get it?
[05:12] Vigne
    Hell's bells!
[05:14] Raphiel
    Then perhaps you could try
    acting like Satania-san?
[05:18] Vigne
    Like Satania?
[05:20] (Flashback) Satania
    I am the future queen of Hell,
[05:23] (Flashback) Satania
    Kurumizawa Satanichia McDowell.
[05:26] (Flashback) Satania
    My abyssal darkness envelops your very soul!
[05:31] Vigne
    O-Okay, I'll try.
[05:35] Vigne
    I am the demon at whose feet
    darkness grovels,
[05:39] Vigne
    Tsukinose Vignette April.
[05:42] Vigne
    I hold this world in the palm of my hand!
SIGN    Oh, so... beastly!
SIGN    Oh, so... beastly!
SIGN    Oh, so... beastly!
[05:45] Vigne
    Despair in the darkest depths of...
[05:48] Vigne
    I can't do it!
[05:49] Vigne
    I'll die of embarrassment!
[05:51] Raphiel
    Oh, dear.
SIGN    Gloom
[05:58] Master narr
    One of the few people*
    who can appreciate my coffee,
[06:02] Master narr
    the angel who compliments my blend
    with a smile on every cup,
[06:08] Master narr
    hasn't taken a single sip
    and is in a dark, dark mood.
[06:12] Master narr
    I want to dispel her darkness.
[06:14] Master narr
    No. I must!
[06:18] Master
    What's the matter?
[06:20] Master
    Something on your mind?
[06:22] Vigne
    N-No... Well...
[06:25] Master
    If you need someone to talk to,
    I'd be happy to listen.
[06:28] Vigne
    Huh?
[06:29] Vigne
    Really?
[06:30] Master
    Though an old man like me
    might not be much help.
[06:34] Vigne
    No, no, that's not true.
[06:37] Vigne
    Erm...
[06:38] Vigne
    Would you mind if I asked a question?
[06:41] Master
    What is it?
[06:44] Master
    I'm all ears.
[06:45] Master
    Go ahead.
[06:47] Vigne
    Could you tell me how to do bad deeds?!
[06:50] Master narr
    What?!
[06:51] Master narr
    What did she just say?
[06:53] Master narr
    "Bad deeds"?!
[06:54] Master narr
    Are my ears starting to go?!
[06:57] Vigne
    I just can't seem to do bad deeds.
[07:00] Master narr
    They aren't?!
[07:03] Vigne
    Is there any kind of trick to doing them?
[07:06] Master narr
    A trick to doing bad deeds?!
[07:09] Master
    I think it's better
    not to do any bad deeds...
[07:12] Vigne
    I can't not do them!
[07:14] Master narr
    What?!
[07:16] Vigne
    I'm so sorry!
[07:18] Master
    No, it's quite all right.
[07:21] Master narr
    Why would she want to do bad things?
[07:24] Master narr
    She's such a kind and caring girl.
[07:27] Master narr
    No, she couldn't possibly
    want to do any bad deeds.
[07:33] Master narr
    There must be some
    complicated reason for this.
[07:36] Master narr
    She must be in a situation
    where she'll be forced to do bad deeds.
[07:41] Master narr
    For instance...
[07:44] Vigne
    Ya got stones, I give ya that.
[07:47] Vigne
    If ya want a fight, I'll give ya one.
[07:49] Vigne
    Diss me, and they peel
    ya face off pavement. Feel?
[07:53] Master narr
    She's cast in the role
    of a gang girl in a play!
[07:56] Master narr
    Then it would only be right
    for her to explore her character!
[08:01] Vigne
    Ya dissin' me?
[08:07] Vigne
    Maybe it isn't something
    that you can help me with. Forget I asked.
[08:12] Master
    N-Not at all.
[08:16] Master
    Truth be told, I used to be
    quite the rebel myself.
[08:21] Master
    I think I can be of help to you.
[08:24] Vigne
    Really?
[08:27] Master
    Back in the day, they would call me
    the Indestructible Buddha-Face.
[08:33] Vigne
    I'm not sure what that means, but wow!
SIGN    Coffee of the Day
[08:36] Master
    Let's brainstorm some bad deeds
    for you, shall we?
[08:39] Vigne
    Okay!
SIGN    The Next Day
[08:44] Vigne
    Master-san helped me come up
    with so many bad deeds
SIGN    11/7 Stopped at Moon Coffee on the way home from school and asked Raphi for advice. When we got to my place, she dressed me up as a bear... for the sake of her own silly pun. She did other embarrassing things to me, too...
SIGN    After shopping for dinner, I went to Angel Coffee. Master's (Miscreant) Advice Be late: Hard... Fake being sick to skip school: Can't!!! Skip lunch: Might not be a bad deed? Don't drink coffee all day: Toughest one for Master!
[08:47] Vigne
    that even I should be able to do.
[08:50] Vigne
    I won't let you down, Master-san.
[08:52] Vigne
    I'll pull this off with flying colors
    and become a demon among demons!
[08:57] Master narr
    A-A demon?!
[08:59] Vigne narr
    To start my evil streak...
[09:02] Vigne narr
    I didn't button up my cardigan.
[09:05] Vigne narr
    What's more, I loosened my ribbon
    to up the bad girl vibe.
[09:09] Vigne narr
    And the pièce de résistance: the baggy socks
    that Master-san talked about!
[09:12] Vigne narr
    I'm dressed so slovenly!
[09:14] Vigne narr
    My goodness, I'm being such a bad girl!
[09:17] Vigne narr
    I'm dying to see Gab's reaction!
[09:20] Gab
    Mornin'.
[09:24] Vigne
    Morning, Gab.
[09:27] Gab
    God, I'm sleepy.
[09:28] Gab
    Another day, another sacrifice of sleep time
    for the praise and glory of "school."
[09:32] Vigne
    Y-Yeah, guess so.
[09:34] Vigne narr
    Now, how will she react?
[09:38] Vigne narr
    I'm getting butterflies.
[09:41] Gab
    What?
[09:43] Gab
    Let's get our butts to school.
[09:46] Vigne narr
    Huh?!
[09:47] Vigne narr
    She ignored it?!
[09:49] Vigne narr
    But I'm dressed so badly!
[09:52] Vigne narr
    Well, that's fine.
[09:53] Vigne narr
    I'll try one of Master-san's teachings:
[09:55] Vigne narr
    that phrase.
[09:57] Vigne**
    G-Gab!
[09:59] Gab
    What?
[10:01] Vigne
    B...
[10:02] Vigne
    Bad to the bone.
[10:04] Gab
    Say what now?
[10:08] Vigne narr
    That's strange.
[10:09] Vigne narr
    Why didn't she notice?
[10:12] Vigne narr
    Did I get something wrong?
[10:14] Vigne narr
    No, Master-san and I had
    a great brainstorming session.
[10:17] Vigne narr
    I have backup plans.
[10:19] Vigne narr
    My next bad deed will clinch it.
[10:21] Vigne narr
    My next bad deed will be...
[10:27] Vigne narr
    leaving the tip of Gab's pen out!
[10:31] Vigne narr
    She has to notice this.
[10:33] Vigne narr
    After all, if you don't catch that quick,
    your pen tip dries up.
[10:41] Gab
    Huh?
[10:41] Gab
    How'd that get left out?
[10:43] Vigne narr
    Hooked her!
[10:47] Vigne
    Wait! Gab!
[10:48] Gab
    Uh, what?
[10:49] Vigne
    You just put your pen away, right?
[10:52] Gab
    Yeah, and?
[10:53] Vigne
    Didn't you notice anything?
[10:55] Gab
    No?
[10:56] Vigne
    Wasn't the tip still out?
[10:59] Gab
    Oh, was it?
[11:01] Gab
    Eh, whatevs.
[11:03] Vigne narr
    "Wh-Whatevs"?
[11:05] Vigne narr
    That pen might end up ruined,
[11:07] Vigne narr
    and all she says is "whatevs"?!
[11:09] Vigne narr
    Meanwhile, I'm positively horrified
    by the thought...
[11:13] Teacher
    Aoki.
[11:13] Student
    Here.
[11:14] Teacher
    Prez.
[11:15] Vigne narr
    There's only one way to salvage this.
[11:15] Prez
    Here.
[11:16] Teacher
    Ueno.
[11:17] Student
    Here.
[11:18] Teacher
    Ukami.
[11:18] Vigne narr
    I really didn't want to do this, but...
[11:18] Student
    Here.
[11:20] Teacher
    Edogawa.
[11:21] Student
    Here.
[11:21] Vigne narr
    Master-san and I came up
    with this as a last resort.
[11:22] Teacher
    Koyamada.
[11:23] Student
    Here.
[11:26] Vigne
    Skipping class!
[11:28] Vigne
    Yes, the standard bad-girl fare.
[11:30] Vigne
    All roads lead to skipping class.
[11:33] Vigne narr
    But jumping straight to skipping class
    is like running a marathon cold...
[11:38] (Flashback) Vigne
    What?!
[11:39] (Flashback) Vigne
    Skip class?!
[11:41] (Flashback) Master
    Back in my day, delinquents would
    always skip classes.
[11:45] (Flashback) Master
    They'd leave the school grounds
    and go to town.
[11:47] (Flashback) Vigne
    You, too, Master-san?
[11:49] (Flashback) Master
    O-Of course.
[11:51] (Flashback) Master
    They would call me
    Saint Skipper the Buddha-Face.
[11:55] (Flashback) Vigne
    W-Wow!
[11:57] (Flashback) Vigne
    Okay.
[11:58] (Flashback) Vigne
    So I need to skip class.
[12:01] (Flashback) Vigne
    I don't know if I can do that.
[12:04] (Flashback) Master
    Right, actually skipping class might be
    a bit too bad a deed. That's true.
[12:09] (Flashback) Vigne
    Even considering it has my heart pounding.
[12:12] (Flashback) Master
    How's this for a bad deed, then?
[12:15] (Flashback) Master
    Skip taking notes during class.
[12:17] (Flashback) Master
    In a sense, since it means
    you aren't participating in class,
[12:21] (Flashback) Master
    it might count as actually skipping class.
[12:24] (Flashback) Vigne
    You're right!
[12:27] Vigne
    Master-san, I won't let you down!
[12:30] Vigne
    I'll skip this class—all sixty minutes of it!
[12:39] Vigne narr
    That was hard as Hell.
[12:41] Vigne narr
    I never imagined that
    doing nothing for sixty minutes
[12:44] Vigne narr
    could be so mentally draining.
[12:47] Vigne narr
    The number of times I caught myself
    starting to take notes...
[12:51] Vigne narr
    But I did it! I skipped class!
[12:55] Gab
    What's up with you today?
[12:57] Vigne
    Oh, nothing.
[13:00] Vigne
    But get this, Gab.
[13:02] Gab
    Uh, what?
[13:03] Gab
    You're scaring me.
[13:05] Vigne
    I wasn't taking notes
    during the class we just had.
[13:10] Vigne
    Well?
[13:12] Vigne narr
    Bring it!
[13:14] Gab
    Uh-huh...
[13:16] Vigne narr
    And it's over!
[13:19] Vigne narr
    Sixty straight minutes of evil,
[13:21] Vigne narr
    and that's all she says?
[13:23] Gab
    Nurse's office?
[13:24] Vigne
    Restroom.
[13:29] Vigne narr
    My evil streak didn't get through at all.
[13:31] Vigne narr
    All that hard work, just for an "uh-huh."
[13:34] Vigne narr
    Maybe I'm just not cut out for evil.
[13:38] Satania
    Huh?
[13:38] Satania
    Vignette!
[13:41] Satania
    Where are you going?
[13:42] Vignette
    Restroom.
[13:43] Satania
    I'll go with you.
[13:46] Satania
    Hey. You're dressed kinda different today.
[13:50] Satania
    Stickin' it to the uniform police? Nice.
[13:56] Satania
    What's with the hand?
[13:58] Vigne
    Just put your hand up.
[14:08] Vigne
    I'm back!
[14:11] Gab
    Uh, yeah. Hi?
[14:13] Vigne
    Yay!
[14:15] Vigne
    Yay, yay!
[14:26] Vigne
    Huh?
[14:27] Vigne
    It hasn't increased?
[14:33] Vigne
    Gab, you've been tardy an awful lot lately.
[14:37] Gab
    Who cares? The teacher isn't here yet.
[14:40] Gab
    Wait, gimme some cash.
[14:42] Vigne
    Why?
[14:44] Gab
    I'm all outta dough for the month.
[14:46] Gab
    No microtransactions means
    staying up waiting for heals,
[14:49] Gab
    and then oversleeping.
[14:53] Gab
    So gimme some cash.
[14:54] Vigne
    No way in Hell.
[14:56] Vigne
    Stop playing video games
    and go to bed on time.
SIGN    The Next Day
[15:06] Gab narr
    She got on my case
    about being late yesterday,
[15:09] Gab narr
    but look who's late today.
SIGN    Vignette
SIGN    Sorry. At home with a cold today.
SIGN    You'd better listen in class!
SIGN    Cough
SIGN    Cough
[15:17] Gab narr
    Doesn't the Devil look after his own?
[15:22] Vigne narr
    Complacency killed the demon.
[15:24] Vigne narr
    So demons can catch human colds
    in the human world?
[15:28] Vigne narr
    Human colds are worse than I ever imagined.
[15:30] Vigne narr
    I keep sneezing, my nose is runny,
[15:32] Vigne narr
    and my head's all hazy.
[15:34] Vigne narr
    How am I supposed to fall asleep?
[15:38] Vigne narr
    Oh, right.
[15:39] Vigne narr
    Humans like to count animals
    to help them fall asleep.
[15:44] Vigne narr
    Which animal was it again?
SIGN    Hell's Guard Dog
SIGN    Cerberus
[15:49] Vigne narr
    Cerberus?
[15:52] Song
    One Cerberus.
[15:58] Song
    Two Cerberi.
[16:04] Song
    Three Cerberi.
[16:10] Song
    Four Cerberi.
[16:15] Vigne narr
    Come on, hop over the fence.
[16:21] Vigne narr
    They just keep piling up!
[16:28] Vigne narr
    I can't sleep at all.
[16:31] Satania
    Coming down with the common cold?
[16:33] Satania
    Oh, that Vignette. So sad.
[16:36] Raphiel
    You've never caught a cold
    in your life, Satania-san?
[16:39] Satania
    Obviously not!
[16:41] Satania
    I'm not some lightweight loser.
[16:44] Satania
    They say the race is to
    the slowest and steadiest!
[16:46] Satania
    So I'm too slow to catch a cold!
[16:48] Raphiel
    Um, where did you...
[16:50] Satania
    Wh-What?
[16:52] Satania
    It's not like I got that
    from Gabriel or anything!
[16:54] Raphiel
    I see.
[16:56] Satania
    I-I really didn't!
[16:57] Raphi narr
    You do me proud, Gab-chan.
[17:05] Vigne narr
    I really should eat something,
[17:07] Vigne narr
    but I don't have anything in the fridge
[17:10] Vigne narr
    or the energy to go shopping.
[17:15] Raphi
    We came by...
[17:16] Satania
    ...to check on you!
[17:18] Vigne
    And you're that wired?
[17:20] Vigne
    You came by to play around.
[17:22] Satania
    Oh, ye of little faith!
[17:24] Satania
    Look, I even brought you a get-well gi—
[17:29] Satania
    You!
[17:30] Satania
    Bad dog! Get back here!
[17:32] Raphi
    This is what I brought for you.
[17:35] Raphi
    Enjoy.
[17:41] Satania
    Sorry. I couldn't reclaim your melon bread.
[17:44] Vigne
    I think I'll get over it.
[17:46] Satania
    Why is that mutt so devoted
    to snatching my bread?
[17:51] Raphi
    Maybe he likes you?
[17:53] Satania
    I don't need that kind of devotion!
[17:55] Satania
    How dare he spoil this visit?!
[17:57] Vigne
    It's okay. It's the thought that counts.
[17:59] Satania
    Well, it's not over yet.
[18:01] Satania
    I brought you more than just bread.
[18:03] Vigne
    Oh, really?
[18:05] Vigne
    Sorry about the playing around thing.
SIGN    The Game of Eternal Life
SIGN    Carry out your destiny.
    Guide mankind!
SIGN    Heaven or Hell?!
[18:10] Satania
    Voila!
[18:11] Satania
    The Game of Eternal Life!
[18:12] Raphi
    I also brought a game.
[18:14] Vigne
    I knew it. You came by to play around.
[18:17] Satania
    No, no.
[18:18] Satania
    I figured sleeping all day'd
    bore you to death.
[18:20] Raphi
    I thought I'd jump on the
    Satania-san bandwagon.
[18:29] Vigne narr
    Please! Don't they know how to act
    when visiting the sick?
[18:33] Vigne narr
    I think my fever went up.
[18:35] Vigne narr
    I have to sleep off this cold.
[18:45] Vigne narr
    I still can't fall asleep.
[18:47] Vigne narr
    Which animal did humans count
    to fall asleep?
[18:51] Vigne narr
    It's not Cerberi...
[18:53] Vigne narr
    It was something smaller, softer, cuter...
[18:58] Vigne narr
    Gabriel?!
[18:59] Vigne narr
    From when we first met?
[19:04] Vigne narr
    Well, it's worth a try.
[19:07] Song
    One Gabriel.
[19:13] Song
    Two Gabriels.
[19:19] Song
    Three Gabriels.
[19:26] Vigne narr
    Is she sleepy?
[19:27] Vigne narr
    Wait, the first two are already down?!
[19:30] Vigne narr
    No, don't sleep!
[19:31] Vigne narr
    Wake up, Gab!
[19:33] Vigne narr
    Ah, there's Gab Number Four!
[19:34] Vigne narr
    Wake up the first three Gabs!
[19:37] Vigne narr
    No, don't sleep! Stay strong!
[19:39] Vigne narr
    No, come on!
[19:41] Vigne narr
    Wake up, you Gabs!
[19:44] Vigne narr
    Another huge pile-up?!
[19:46] Vigne narr
    Give me a break!
[19:48] Vigne
    Wake up, Gabriel!
[19:53] Vigne
    Huh?
[19:54] Gab
    Mornin'.
[19:55] Vigne
    This is my apartment, right?
[19:58] Gab
    Well, yeah.
[20:00] Vigne
    Why are you here?
[20:03] Gab
    I brought your homework.
[20:05] Vigne
    Thanks.
[20:07] Vigne
    Did I doze off?
[20:09] Gab
    I don't know what you were dreaming about,
[20:12] Gab
    but just so you know, there's only one me.
[20:20] Vigne
    Thanks for bringing me my homework, Gab.
[20:24] Gab
    Vigne.
[20:25] Vigne
    Yeah?
[20:26] Gab
    I'm thirsty.
[20:27] Vigne
    Oh, you.
[20:32] Vigne
    Making a sick person serve you tea?
    What's the big idea?
[20:36] Gab
    So, how are you feeling?
[20:40] Gab
    Still sick?
[20:41] Vigne
    Oh, right.
[20:42] Vigne
    I feel much better now.
[20:47] Gab
    Good to hear.
[20:51] Vigne
    Gab...
[20:52] Gab
    What?
[20:54] Vigne
    You were worried about me?
[20:56] Vigne
    Of course you were.
[20:58] Vigne
    You're a sweetheart, deep down.
[21:01] Gab
    Not really.
[21:02] Gab
    I only came over to give you our homework.
[21:05] Vigne
    Come on, don't lie.
[21:10] Vigne
    Um, Gab-san?
[21:12] Gab
    What?
[21:15] Vigne
    Are these two copies
    of the same assignment?
[21:18] Gab
    Oh, yeah.
[21:20] Gab
    One for you and one for me.
[21:22] Vigne
    Why'd you give me yours?
[21:24] Gab
    Figured you could do mine, too.
    Two birds, one stone.
[21:27] Vigne
    Hey, I'm sick, remember?
[21:29] Gab
    But you said you're feeling better, right?
[21:33] Vigne
    That's why you asked how I was feeling?
[21:40] Vigne
    Good grief! What is wrong with them all?!
[21:42] Vigne
    It's like they all came over
    just to make me sicker.
[21:47] Vigne
    Huh?
SIGN    Original Udon
[21:49] Vigne
    Did she forget that?
[21:53] Vigne
    So she did come by because she cares.
[21:56] (Flashback) Flashback
    I'm all outta dough for the month.
[22:02] Vigne
    Jeez, that girl.
SIGN    Gabriel
SIGN    Gabriel
[22:07] Vigne
    Gabriel?