10 - The Angels and Demons Return Home

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:04] Satania
    Damn angels!
[00:06] Satania
    I can't believe they
    thwarted my infiltration.
[00:09] Vigne
    I can't believe you thought you could
    get inside with that fake halo.
[00:27] Raphi
    Really?
[00:28] Raphi
    You haven't come home
    since going to the human world?
[00:32] Gab
    Meh.
[00:33] Gab
    Going home's effort.
SIGN    Please come again
SIGN    Welcome to Heaven
SIGN    Episode 10 The Angels and Demons Return Home
[02:18] Raphi
    See you.
[02:28] Gab
    I'm stuck without my computer or video games.
[02:31] Gab
    Oh, well. I'll just sleep my ass off.
[02:35] Gab
    I'm home.
[02:37] Haniel
    Welcome home!
[02:39] Gab
    Hey, Haniel.
[02:42] Haniel
    Gab-oneechan, it's been so long!
[02:45] Gab
    Hey there, my hyper little sister.
[02:48] Gab
    Quick, is Onee-chan around?
[02:50] Haniel
    Zel-oneechan's at university.
    She'll be home late.
[02:53] Haniel
    And Mom and Dad won't be home
    until evening 'cause of work.
[02:58] Gab
    Okay.
[02:59] Haniel
    Hey, hey, what was the human world like?
[03:01] Haniel
    Fun?
[03:03] Gab
    Yeah.
[03:04] Gab
    Super fun.
[03:06] Haniel
    Wow, really?
[03:08] Haniel
    I wanna see it, too.
[03:13] Haniel
    Huh?
[03:15] Haniel
    Gab-oneechan, you seem a little different.
[03:18] Gab
    Must seem that way since I matured
    in the human world.
[03:22] Haniel
    Oh, okay!
[03:24] Haniel
    That's my Gab-oneechan!
[03:30] Gab narr
    My big sis isn't home to nag at me.
[03:32] Gab narr
    All right!
[03:33] Gab narr
    Sleep until evening.
[03:35] Haniel
    Play with me until evening!
[03:37] Gab
    Sorry.
[03:38] Gab
    I'm tired, so I'm going to rest
    in my room for a bit.
[03:41] Haniel
    Oh, okay...
[03:43] Haniel
    All right...
[03:46] Haniel
    Sorry, Gab-oneechan.
[03:48] Haniel
    Rest well.
[03:52] Gab
    Just kidding!
[03:53] Haniel
    You'll play with me?
[03:54] Haniel
    Yay!
[03:56] Haniel
    Um, then let's play...
[03:58] Gab narr
    I'll just half-ass it to keep her happy.
[04:01] Haniel
    Horsey ride!
[04:03] Gab narr
    I'll die, half-ass!
[04:04] Haniel
    Can we?
[04:07] Gab
    All right, bring it on!
[04:15] Gab narr
    She's really heavy!
[04:18] Haniel
    Gab-oneechan, you okay?
[04:20] Gab
    You've gotten big, little sis.
[04:28] Haniel
    Onee-chan?
[04:32] Gab
    God called the horsey to Heaven.
[04:35] Haniel
    Horsey!
[04:37] Gab
    Let's play something a little easier.
[04:40] Haniel
    O-Okay.
[04:41] Haniel
    Um... then let's play... cat's cradle!
[04:45] Gab
    Sounds great.
[04:47] Gab narr
    And not effort.
[04:50] Haniel
    Onee-chan, watch close, okay?
[04:53] Haniel
    This part goes here...
[04:56] Haniel
    Look! It's a ladder!
[04:59] Haniel
    And, and! This part...
[05:01] Gab
    You're doin' great.
[05:03] Gab narr
    How is this supposed to be fun?
[05:06] Haniel
    Let's play with these next.
[05:08] Haniel
    Here's yours.
[05:17] Haniel
    You're good at this, Onee-chan!
[05:19] Gab
    Oh, yeah?
[05:21] Haniel
    Next is this.
[05:22] Haniel
    Here I go!
[05:25] Gab
    Wow.
[05:26] Gab
    You're good at this.
[05:29] Haniel
    Hey, what should we play next?
[05:31] Haniel
    Chinese ropes?
[05:33] Haniel
    Slap cards?
[05:34] Haniel
    I've got cup-and-ball, too.
[05:36] Gab
    Is Heaven stuck in the Showa era?
[05:38] Haniel
    "Showa"?
[05:39] Gab
    Uh, never mind.
[05:42] Haniel
    What to play...
[05:44] Gab narr
    Could you let me go sometime soon?
[05:48] Haniel
    Oh, I know!
[05:50] Gab
    What?
[05:50] Gab
    Spinning tops?
[05:52] Haniel
    Mom made a snack for us.
[05:55] Gab
    A snack?!
[05:56] Haniel
    I'll go get it.
[05:57] Gab
    Thanks.
[05:59] Gab narr
    All right.
[05:59] Gab narr
    First comes snacktime,
    then comes naptime and sweet freedom.
[06:03] Gab narr
    I was just getting hungry, too.
[06:06] Haniel
    I'm back.
[06:07] Gab
    Ooh, what is it?
[06:09] Haniel
    Roasted beans.
[06:10] Gab narr
    Roasted beans?!
[06:12] Haniel
    Mom said for the two of us to eat them.
[06:14] Gab
    This is totally Showa.
[06:16] Haniel
    Huh?
[06:18] Haniel
    Thanks for this food.
[06:19] Gab
    Thanks for this food...
[06:24] Haniel
    It's yummy, huh, Gab-oneechan?
[06:27] Gab
    Uh-huh.
[06:29] Gab narr
    I need to get back to the human world, stat.
SIGN    The Kurumizawa Family
[07:01] Dad
    Satanichia, child.
[07:03] Dad
    How is your life in the human world?
[07:05] Mom
    Do the humans cower in fear of you?
[07:09] Satania
    Naturally, Father, Mother.
[07:12] Satania
    It is only a matter of time before
    the school is in the palm of my hand.
[07:16] Satania
    From there, I shall expand
    my dark domain far further.
[07:21] Dad
    That's our daughter.
[07:22] Dad
    So distinguished.
[07:23] Mom
    Truly she is.
[07:25] Dad
    Then let us dine forthwith.
[07:29] Dad
    Butler!
[07:30] Dad
    The meal!
[07:34] Dad
    Butler? Butler!
[07:36] Mom
    How odd.
[07:37] Mom
    Was it his day off today?
[07:39] Bro
    Dad. Mom.
[07:41] Bro
    We don't have a butler.
[07:47] Dad
    We knew that, of course.
[07:49] Mom
    That's our son.
[07:50] Mom
    So sharp.
[07:52] Satania
    But it wouldn't have been strange
    if a butler did appear!
[07:57] Mom
    By the way, Satanichia,
[07:59] Mom
    I hear there is a particularly
    troublesome angel at your school.
[08:02] Mom
    Is she a problem?
[08:04] Satania
    Not in the least, Mother.
[08:07] Satania
    On the contrary, I'm executing a plan
    to bring that angel to the dark side.
[08:11] Mom
    Oh, my! What a powerful daughter we have!
[08:14] Dad
    Indeed. We must toast
    to our talented daughter.
[08:18] Dad
    Of course, we toast with...
[08:20] Mom
    ...human...
[08:21] Satania
    ...blood.
[08:24] Dad
    What's the matter, son?
[08:26] Dad
    Aren't you going to toast with us?
[08:28] Bro
    No thanks.
[08:29] Bro
    And, like, it's tomato juice.
SIGN    Human Blood
    Tomato Juice
[08:36] Dad
    Touché, son! Touché!
[08:38] Mom
    Such calm, cool judgment.
[08:40] Mom
    He'll be a great demon, too.
[08:42] Satania
    But its color and luster
[08:44] Satania
    are almost like real blood, right?
[08:48] Dad
    In any case, the conquest of your school
    is progressing smoothly. I am pleased.
[08:53] Satania
    It's only the natural order of things for me.
[08:56] Dad
    The day you use our family's
    secret demonic secret elixir
[08:59] Dad
    to grasp the human world fully
    in your hands is nigh.
[09:04] Satania
    Oh, yes.
[09:05] Satania
    Our family's secret demonic secret elixir
[09:08] Satania
    shall make all humans
    prostrate themselves at my feet!
[09:12] Mom
    Fabulous!
[09:13] Mom
    Oh, how fabulous!
[09:16] Bro
    Yeah, no.
[09:17] Bro
    Like, our family doesn't
    make any secret elixirs.
SIGN    Kurumizawa Bakery
[09:23] Bro
    We bake cakes.
[09:25] Dad
    I see.
[09:26] Dad
    That's another way of looking at it.
[09:28] Mom
    That's our son!
[09:29] Mom
    He has such a unique point of view.
[09:31] Satania
    Who cares about the details?
[09:34] Satania
    We gotta keep the right
    atmosphere going on here!
[09:36] Dad
    A toast to our family's future!
[09:41] Bro narr
    My family's crazy.
[09:43] Bro narr
    Can't wait until I'm old enough
    to move out.
SIGN    Human Blood
    Tomato Juice
[09:51] Vigne
    It's been so long.
[09:53] Vigne
    I wonder how everyone's doing.
[10:00] Vigne narr
    Come to think of it,
[10:01] Vigne narr
    I found that baby monster
[10:02] Vigne narr
    before I left for the human world, didn't I?
SIGN    One year ago
[10:07] (Flashback) Vigne
    Let's hike to the mountain
    that erupts red fire...
[10:13] (Flashback) Vigne
    Red fire...
[10:14] (Flashback) Mom
    Goodness, Vignette!
[10:16] (Flashback) Mom
    Don't go too far ahead, now! It's dangerous!
[10:18] (Flashback) Vigne
    I'm fine!
[10:19] (Flashback) Vigne
    I'm not a little kid anymore!
[10:23] (Flashback) Dad
    Vignette can't resist an event.
[10:26] (Flashback) Vigne
    Funiculi funicula funiculi...
[10:32] (Flashback) Vigne
    A baby monster!
[10:34] (Flashback) Vigne
    It's hurt!
[10:36] (Flashback) Mom
    Vignette, what are you doing?
[10:40] (Flashback) Mom
    Oh, dear.
[10:41] (Flashback) Dad
    Must've gotten hurt
    and separated from its parents.
[10:44] (Flashback) Mom
    Why don't we keep it, then?
[10:47] (Flashback) Dad
    Good idea!
[10:48] (Flashback) Dad
    Vignette's about to go
    off to the human world.
[10:50] (Flashback) Dad
    We'll have a lot of free time.
[10:52] (Flashback) Vigne
    You make it sound like I'm a huge handful.
[10:55] (Flashback) Mom
    Well, you are a handful.
[10:58] (Flashback) Vigne
    Good grief!
[11:02] (Flashback) Dad
    Well, this little fella will need a name.
[11:05] (Flashback) Mom
    You found him, Vignette.
[11:06] (Flashback) Mom
    You can name him.
[11:08] (Flashback) Vigne
    Huh?
[11:09] (Flashback) Vigne
    O-Okay.
[11:11] (Flashback) Vigne
    How about...
[11:13] (Flashback) Vigne
    Ch-Chappy?
[11:17] Vigne
    Right, I named him Chappy.
[11:20] Vigne
    I can't wait to see him.
[11:24] Vigne
    I'm home!
[11:25] Vigne
    Mom, I'm back!
[11:31] Vigne
    What the?
[11:41] Mom
    Goodness, Vignette,
    why the bloodcurdling scream?
[11:45] Vigne
    M-M-M-Mom!
[11:47] Vigne
    Wild monster!
[11:48] Vigne
    A wild monster in the house!
[11:49] Mom
    Oh, please. Wild monster?
[11:50] Mom
    It's just Chappy-chan.
[11:53] Mom
    Did you forget him?
[11:54] Vigne
    Huh?
[11:56] Vigne
    Chappy?
[12:00] Vigne
    Ch-Chappy...
[12:01] Vigne
    Y-You mean my little Chappy?
[12:02] Mom
    The one and only.
[12:04] Vigne
    This is not the Chappy I remember!
[12:12] Mom
    You know how fast monsters grow.
[12:14] Vigne
    Too fast!
[12:16] Mom
    I know.
[12:17] Mom
    Why don't you take Chappy on his walk today?
[12:20] Vigne
    W-Walk?
[12:22] Vigne
    N-No way, no way, no way, no way.
[12:23] Vigne
    He's so big, he'll be walking me!
[12:27] Vigne
    One wrong move and he might eat me!
[12:29] Mom
    He would never do that. Don't worry.
[12:32] Vigne
    B-But...
[12:35] Mom
    See?
[12:36] Mom
    Chappy-chan remembers you.
[12:38] Vigne
    Yup...
[12:40] Vigne
    Can I take a bath first, though?
[12:44] Vigne
    Okay.
[12:44] Vigne
    Shall we be on our way?
[12:47] Vigne
    Is there any point in keeping him on a leash?
[12:56] Vigne
    What did you eat to get so big?
[13:03] Vigne
    Uh-oh.
[13:04] Mom
    Is something wrong, Vignette?
[13:06] Mom
    What was that loud noise?
[13:08] Vigne
    Mom, I'm sorry!
[13:10] Vigne
    I was trying to lead Chappy outside, but—
[13:17] Satania
    My familiar, born of the eddies
    of the maelstrom...
[13:21] Satania
    Come forth!
[13:22] Satania
    The time is ripe!
[13:25] Satania
    In accordance with our contract,
[13:28] Satania
    you will release your true power... now!
[13:32] Satania
    Alexander,
[13:34] Satania
    you are the great archdemon
    Satanichia's elite familiar.
[13:38] Satania
    Be proud.
[13:40] Satania
    Shake!
[13:42] Satania
    Sit!
[13:45] Satania
    Who's a good familiar?
[13:48] Vigne
    Stop!
[13:50] Vigne
    Chappy, stop!
[13:52] Vigne
    Stop!
[13:53] Satania
    Huh?!
[13:58] Vigne
    Bad boy! You can't just take off running!
[14:00] Satania
    Wait, wait, Vignette!
[14:01] Satania
    What is that thing?!
[14:03] Vigne
    Oh, hi, Satania.
[14:04] Vigne
    This is my pet, Chappy.
[14:06] Satania
    What?
[14:07] Satania
    Your pet?
[14:10] Vigne
    Now, now, Chappy. Settle down.
[14:15] Satania
    We're not about to lose.
[14:17] Satania
    Alexan—
[14:19] Satania
    Alexander!
SIGN    Playing dead
[14:28] Martiel
    Welcome home, milady.
[14:30] Martiel
    We awaited your return
    with heartfelt anticipation.
[14:33] Raphi
    I'm back, Martiel.
[14:39] Raphi
    Where are Father and Mother?
[14:41] Martiel
    They are at a luncheon with friends.
[14:44] Martiel
    They should return after nightfall.
[14:46] Raphi
    And Sara-chan?
[14:48] Martiel
    Your younger sister is at
    a friend's birthday party.
[14:52] Martiel
    She will return this evening.
[14:55] Raphi
    Do I have any appointments?
[14:58] Martiel
    For the duration of your stay,
[15:00] Martiel
    you have five luncheon invitations,
SIGN    Raphiel-sama
[15:02] Martiel
    two date invitations,
[15:04] Martiel
    and one request for business advice.
[15:07] Raphiel
    None of that sounds very fun.
[15:10] Martiel
    Then I will handle them so as not to offend.
[15:14] Raphi
    Sorry to always put that on you.
[15:15] Martiel
    Not at all.
[15:16] Martiel
    It is my duty to be helpful to you, milady.
[15:20] Raphi
    Thanks.
[15:22] Martiel
    Milady.
[15:23] Raphi
    Yes?
[15:24] Martiel
    I have prepared a bath for you,
[15:26] Martiel
    as you must be tired from your trip.
[15:28] Raphi
    Oh, my. I appreciate it.
[15:37] Raphi
    Thanks.
[15:44] Martiel
    Well, milady,
[15:45] Martiel
    I will undress you now.
[15:48] Raphi
    That's all right. I'll undress myself.
[15:51] Martiel
    Oh, no.
[15:51] Martiel
    If I want to get hold of milady's warm,
    freshly-stripped underthings,
[15:55] Martiel
    I really should do it myself.
[15:59] Raphi
    I'd rather you not
    get hold of my underthings.
[16:01] Raphi
    Out, please.
[16:03] Martiel
    Yes, milady.
[16:08] Martiel
    It's been too long since I was blessed
    with milady's look of scorn.
[16:17] Raphi narr
    Some things never change.
[16:31] Raphi
    What are you doing?
[16:33] Martiel
    I hoped to sear every detail
    of milady's growth this last year,
[16:36] Martiel
    from your smooth porcelain skin
[16:38] Martiel
    to the roundness of your bosom and bottom,
[16:40] Martiel
    et cetera, into my memory.
[16:43] Martiel
    And record it also if possible.
[16:45] Raphi
    I'll report you to the authorities.
SIGN    Principal
[17:00] Raphi
    Raphiel and Gabriel reporting, sir.
[17:03] Principal
    Very good.
[17:04] Principal
    You may enter.
[17:07] Raphi
    Pardon us.
[17:09] Principal
    I've been waiting for you.
[17:11] Principal
    Now, tell me about your accomplishments
    in the human world.
[17:15] Principal
    This report is very important
    and will affect your future stipends.
[17:21] Principal
    You were both were particularly
    talented, even for Heaven.
[17:24] Principal
    I'm sure you've performed
    some impressive feats.
[17:29] Principal
    What is it?
[17:30] Principal
    Come closer and give me your report.
[17:33] Raphi
    Excuse us, sir.
[17:35] Raphi
    Your light's blinding us.
[17:38] Principal
    My mistake.
[17:39] Principal
    It's been so long that I put
    too much divinity into my aura.
[17:47] Principal
    Have a seat.
[17:49] Raphi
    Thank you.
[17:51] Principal
    So, how's life in the human world?
[17:54] Raphi
    It's highly fulfilling.
[17:57] Principal
    I'm glad to hear it.
[17:58] Principal
    Shiraha-kun, I'll hear your report first.
[18:01] Raphi
    Yes, sir.
[18:03] Raphi
    ...and so I learned how
    emotions can change
[18:06] Raphi
    when such events befall humans.
[18:12] Principal
    Impressive, Shiraha-kun.
[18:13] Principal
    Keep up the good work.
[18:16] Raphi
    Thank you.
[18:18] Principal
    Next, Tenma-kun, can I hear your report?
[18:21] Gab
    Yes, sir.
[18:23] Gab
    I...
[18:24] Gab
    have already saved two countries.
[18:26] Principal
    Countries?!
[18:27] Gab
    Yes, sir.
[18:33] Principal
    Could you elaborate?
[18:35] Gab
    Yes, sir.
[18:36] Gab
    When I arrived in the human world,
[18:38] Gab
    one country was already on the brink of ruin.
[18:41] Gab
    The people spent sleepless nights in fear
    of enemies who could attack at any moment.
[18:46] Gab
    It was only a matter of time
    before the country would perish.
[18:51] Gab
    But I refused to give up.
[18:54] Gab
    I resolved to save the country,
[18:56] Gab
    no matter what it took!
[19:01] Gab
    And then!
[19:03] Gab
    It was day after day of difficult battles...
[19:06] Gab
    But!
[19:08] Gab
    After one battle that dragged on for days,
[19:11] Gab
    we won the war.
[19:14] Gab
    I was able to save the country
    from the brink of destruction.
[19:18] Gab
    I'll never forget the smiles the people wore
[19:21] Gab
    when they had finally been freed from fear.
[19:24] Gab
    I have hit the current level cap
[19:27] Gab
    and am waiting for the next quest update.
[19:30] Gab
    That concludes my report.
[19:42] Principal
    It sounds like you're
    doing well for yourselves.
[19:45] Principal
    I'll increase your stipends.
[19:54] Gab
    Nothing to do.
[19:56] Raphi
    We are on vacation.
[19:58] Raphi
    Wait, Gab-chan, I thought
    you enjoyed lazing around.
[20:02] Gab
    Well, yeah.
[20:04] Gab
    But you can get tired of sleeping, you know.
[20:12] Raphi
    Donuts.
[20:13] Gab
    What?
[20:14] Raphi
    Oh, sorry.
[20:16] Raphi
    I have a craving for donuts.
[20:18] Raphi
    Wasn't there a donut shop nearby?
[20:21] Raphi
    Shall we go?
[20:23] Gab
    They're closed today.
[20:29] Raphi
    Squats.
[20:31] Raphi
    Want to do some squats?
[20:33] Gab
    No.
[20:34] Raphi
    I thought not.
[20:40] Raphi
    Want to have a staring contest?
[20:44] Raphi
    We have nothing else to do. Why not?
[20:46] Gab
    Why not? Okay.
[20:48] Raphi
    Here we go.
[20:49] Raphi
    Make whatever funny face you choose.
[20:51] Raphi
    If you laugh, you lose.
[21:02] Gab
    You're pretty good at this, Raphi.
[21:04] Raphi
    Do you think so?
[21:05] Gab
    In that case, I'll bust
    out my best one for ya.
[21:09] Raphi
    Round two, then.
[21:11] Raphi
    Make whatever funny face you choose.
[21:13] Raphi
    If you laugh, you lose.
[21:16] Raphi
    Oh, so sorry.
[21:18] Raphi
    That's my phone.
SIGN    Satania-san
[21:21] Raphi
    Gab-chan! Gab-chan!
[21:23] Raphi
    It's Satania-san!
[21:25] Gab
    What could that idiot want?
[21:28] Raphi
    Hello, Satania-san?
[21:30] Raphi
    What is it?
[21:32] Raphi
    Huh?
[21:33] Raphi
    You'd like to know how to sneak into Heaven?
[21:38] Raphi
    Well, I'm afraid I wouldn't know.
[21:42] Raphi
    No, no, it's true.
[21:45] Raphi
    Let's see now...
[21:47] Raphi
    Well, how about we brainstorm
    a way in together?
[21:50] Raphi
    We'll meet up at the gate.
[21:53] Raphi
    See you there.
[21:55] Raphi
    And that's the plan.
[21:58] Gab
    I'm reluctant to share
    knowledge with a demon.
[22:01] Gab
    But demon or not, she's my friend.
[22:03] Gab
    I can make an exception,
    roll up my sleeves, and help this once.
SIGN    The master moves!!