1 - Daily Lives of High School Boys

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    Daily Lives of High School Boys
[00:09] Tadakuni
    See ya!
[00:12] Tadakuni
    I'm gonna be late!
[00:14] Tadakuni
    My name's Tadakuni.
[00:15] Tadakuni
    I live in a really normal town, go to a really
    normal school and live a really normal life.
[00:22] Yoshitake
    Heeeyyy, Tadakuni!
[00:23] Tadakuni
    'Sup Yoshitake? What the hell are you eating?
[00:26] Yoshitake
    Leftover curry from last night.
[00:28] Hidenori
    C'mon, bro. Munchin' on a slice of toast when
    you're running late is the standard trope.
[00:32] Tadakuni
    You're one to talk!
[00:34] Hidenori
    - Huh? Whaddaya mean?
    - Jeez, you guys... Whoa—!
[00:42] Tadakuni
    What the...?
[01:10] Tadakuni
    No way...
[01:11] Tadakuni
    This is...
SIGN    Adventure Log
[01:13] All
    "Adventure Log"!?
[01:17] Hidenori
    Now then, come ye Mobile Suits!
    We heroes shalt be thine opponents!
[01:21] Tadakuni
    THIS IS ALL WRONG!
[01:23] Yoshitake
    - Yeah. Since when are you the main character?
    - That's not what I was talking about!
[01:28] Hidenori
    I just heard that Square Enix and
    Sunrise are doing a collaboration.
[01:31] Tadakuni
    Dude, this is supposed to be an anime
    about normal high school boys.
[01:34] Tadakuni
    There shouldn't be any
    Mobile Suits or Adventure Logs!
[01:37] Hidenori
    - Is that so?
    - Well, that's boring.
[01:39] Hidenori
    Don't say that!
[01:41] [SONG] ---
    Begin playing a dream of setting out on a quest
    Flip to the first page
[01:59] [SONG] ---
    More than any treasure
    I've found a shining thing
[02:09] [SONG] ---
    When you turn and look
[02:11] [SONG] ---
    All you see are idiotic
    faces stretching out forever
[02:18] [SONG] ---
    The tale that we wrote in this small room
    The prologue of this novel we are telling
[02:29] [SONG] ---
    At a speed that seems like it will reach the skies
    I've come this far without gripping the rudder
[02:39] [SONG] ---
    Begin playing a dream of setting out on a quest
    Flip to the next page
[02:46] [SONG] ---
    Toward the boundless sea of dreams
    Without knowing whether it's light or dark
[02:56] [SONG] ---
    Our one and only quest
    Let's search for the next page
SIGN    High School Boys and After School
[03:22] Tadakuni
    Hey...
[03:24] Tadakuni
    How do you...get a girlfriend?
[03:30] Hidenori
    Okay...
[03:31] Hidenori
    Let's say you're in a
    classroom after school...
[03:34] Hidenori
    Look, there's a lone girl
    separating printouts.
[03:37] Hidenori
    Right there. See?
[03:39] Tadakuni
    We're gonna do a simulation!?
[03:41] Hidenori
    So, what would you do in
    this situation, Tadakuni?
[03:45] Tadakuni
    Uh...
[03:48] Tadakuni
    Hey, I wanna close up the classroom...
[03:50] Yoshitake
    Huh? O-Oh, okay. Sorry.
[03:55] Tadakuni
    Do you have to finish those today?
[03:59] Yoshitake
    Y-Yes, the teacher asked me to...
[04:02] Tadakuni
    Jeez...
[04:05] Tadakuni
    - Here...
    - Huh?
[04:07] Tadakuni
    I'll give you a hand, so...give me half.
[04:11] Yoshitake
    Thank you.
[04:13] Hidenori
    Slam!
[04:16] Hidenori
    Just how long do you two intend
    to stay here? Hurry home!
[04:21] Tadakuni
    Who are you supposed to be!?
[04:22] Hidenori
    Or...were you waiting for Teacher's
    special lesson, Tadakuni?
[04:27] Tadakuni
    U-Um, what's with the
    female teacher barging in?
[04:30] Hidenori
    - I'm doing this all for you!!! Deal with it!
    - Yeah, whatever.
[04:35] Yoshitake
    I'm going home. Good-bye.
[04:37] Tadakuni
    Hang on!
[04:40] Yoshitake
    Game over, dude.
[04:41] Hidenori
    There's a lot of characters,
    so you gotta be quick.
[04:44] Hidenori
    How am I supposed to
    respond to these people!?
[04:47] Yoshitake
    Giving up?
[04:48] Tadakuni
    Hell no! Retry!
[04:51] Hidenori
    Okay, from the classroom, start!
[04:53] Tadakuni
    Need a hand, Prez?
[04:55] Yoshitake
    Oh my gawd, what a jerk...
[04:56] Tadakuni
    - Sorry.
    - Whatever.
[04:58] Yoshitake
    You're in a club, right, Tadakuni?
[05:00] Tadakuni
    A c-club!?
[05:05] Tadakuni
    A-Actually, no, I'm not.
[05:08] Hidenori
    Don't go changing the script!
[05:10] Yoshitake
    Ad-libbing is the soul of theater!
[05:12] Tadakuni
    What does it matter!?
    What the hell are we doing, anyway!?
[05:16] Hidenori
    Dudes, you're ruining everything!
[05:19] Hidenori
    Once more! From the top!
[05:21] Tadakuni
    Let me help you.
[05:23] Yoshitake
    Here.
[05:26] Tadakuni
    I didn't even really wanna
    learn how to get a girlfriend.
[05:30] Tadakuni
    I just asked out of the blue.
    How did it come to this?
[05:35] Tadakuni
    Should I leave the class president be for
    now and just deal with the teacher?
[05:42] Tadakuni
    Here it comes!
[05:43] Hidenori
    Um, are you free right now?
[05:47] Hidenori
    - I thought we could...together...
    - Now you're a different character!?
[05:51] Hidenori
    Dude, you totally suck.
[05:53] Yoshitake
    Give it up, Tadakuni.
[05:55] Yoshitake
    I'm done with this.
[05:59] Tadakuni
    I...forgot something important.
[06:03] Tadakuni
    Class President!
[06:05] Yoshitake
    What's with you? I'm not the class president.
[06:09] Tadakuni
    No. Class President.
[06:11] Tadakuni
    Just come with me!
[06:12] Yoshitake
    The hell!?
[06:13] Hidenori
    Now, Tadakuni!
[06:16] Hidenori
    RUN!!!
[06:19] Hidenori
    Run, Tadakuni!
[06:21] Hidenori
    Forsake that tsundere childhood friend!
[06:26] Hidenori
    Toss out that little sister
    who's not related by blood!
[06:29] Hidenori
    Run until you can no longer see
    that beautiful transfer student!
[06:36] Hidenori
    Run as far as you can without
    letting go of that hand!
[06:51] Tadakuni
    I wanted to show you this view.
[06:54] Yoshitake
    What view!?
[06:57] Hidenori
    That was beautiful, man.
[06:59] Hidenori
    You should be able to get most
    women with a move like that!
[07:06] Tadakuni
    But we go to an all-boys school...
SIGN    This is Daily Lives of High School Boys.
[07:12] Hidenori
    Daily Lives of High School Boys was halfassedly
    brought to you thanks to our sponsors.
SIGN    Don't bother learning their names.
[07:19] Tadakuni
    Don't say "halfassedly"!
SIGN    High School Boys and Skirts
SIGN    Modern Japanese
[07:30] Tadakuni
    Hidenori, what did you put for
    question 4 in Modern J?
[07:34] Hidenori
    Is there a point to comparing answers?
[07:36] Tadakuni
    Just go home already, you guys!
[07:38] Tadakuni
    You're always hanging out at my house!
    Don't you have anything else to do!?
[07:43] Hidenori
    There's no need to yell, Tadakuni.
[07:45] Hidenori
    It's finals week, so we have extra free time.
[07:50] Hidenori
    Fine. I'm going home.
[07:53] Tadakuni
    Jeez...
[08:02] Hidenori
    Hey, Yoshitake, this just came to mind,
    but what do you think of skirts?
[08:08] Yoshitake
    - Dude, get real. I mean—
    - Don't start a discussion! Get outta here!
[08:15] Hidenori
    But it's just cloth wrapped
    around the waist, right!?
[08:19] Yoshitake
    It doesn't hide anything.
[08:20] Tadakuni
    Now, now, the skirt is a fine garment
    passed down from the middle ages.
[08:24] Hidenori
    Be that as it may, they just walk around
    with their panties showing, right!?
[08:28] Hidenori
    There's no way I could
    handle something like that!
[08:30] Yoshitake
    Something with that little
    protection is just shameful!
[08:33] Tadakuni
    Calm down.
[08:37] Hidenori
    Hey...
[08:39] Hidenori
    Can we borrow your little sister's skirt?
[08:41] Tadakuni
    Are you kidding!? Hell no!
[08:45] Yoshitake
    - Found 'em!
    - She'll murder you!
[08:47] Yoshitake
    And one more thing!
[08:54] Hidenori
    - You totally alchemized 'em!
    - Are those my sister's panties!?
[08:58] Yoshitake
    Don't worry. There was
    an equivalent exchange.
[09:01] Yoshitake
    I left my underwear in their place!
[09:03] Tadakuni
    You really are an idiot!
[09:05] Hidenori
    Okay! Hurry up and put it on!
[09:06] Tadakuni
    You're gonna put them on!?
[09:11] Yoshitake
    Hey, aren't you supposed to put
    these on from the bottom?
[09:13] Tadakuni
    She's gonna be so pissed
    at me, so knock it off!
[09:18] Yoshitake
    Ah! Leg hair!
[09:20] Yoshitake
    - What should we do about our leg hair?
    - Who the hell cares!?
[09:23] Hidenori
    Idiot! Isn't it better with leg hair?
[09:26] Tadakuni
    What's better?
[09:27] Yoshitake
    - The hell'd you just say!?
    - You wanna throw down!?
[09:29] Tadakuni
    Kn-Knock it off! Who cares!?
    Just hurry up and put them on!
[09:33] Hidenori
    So you want to put it on
    that bad, huh? Pervert!
[09:36] Yoshitake
    Calm your ass down!
[09:37] Tadakuni
    I don't even know where to begin with this!
[09:41] Hidenori
    Okay, I'm gonna go over there.
[09:43] Yoshitake
    I'll take this way.
[09:44] Tadakuni
    Hold on a sec. Are we
    really gonna put them on?
[09:58] Tadakuni
    You put 'em on?
[09:59] Hidenori
    Yeah...
[10:00] Yoshitake
    Somehow...
[10:17] Tadakuni
    DIIIEEEEEE!!!
[10:22] Tadakuni
    Just go home already...
[10:23] Yoshitake
    It looks really good on you!
[10:25] Hidenori
    Dude, you could make some
    serious money like this.
[10:28] Hidenori
    Er, I didn't mean like that.
[10:32] Tadakuni
    Seriously?
[10:33] Yoshitake
    It looks so good!
[10:34] Tadakuni
    Now, that's not true...
[10:36] Yoshitake
    No, it seriously looks great on
    you. Have some confidence!
[10:45] Tadakuni
    - H-How's this?
    - That's the pose!
[10:48] Hidenori
    Sooo good, Tadakuni!
    Somehow, your whole body's changed!
[10:51] Yoshitake
    What happened to your male hormones?
[10:53] Hidenori
    Let's take it to the next level!
[11:05] Tadakuni's Little Sister
    What's wrong?
[11:06] Tadakuni's Little Sister
    Keep going.
[11:07] ---
    W-We're so sorry.
SIGN    High School Boys and Ghost Stories
[11:18] Hidenori
    The other day, I was eating
    at this restaurant.
[11:22] Tadakuni
    What's with you, all of a sudden?
[11:24] Hidenori
    I don't know what school she was from,
    but there was a super cute girl there.
[11:30] Hidenori
    She appeared to be eating
    some kind of fish lunch set.
[11:33] Hidenori
    I was having udon.
[11:35] Hidenori
    After a while, she got up from her seat.
[11:40] Hidenori
    And on her cleaned out rice bowl,
[11:46] Hidenori
    lay three chopsticks...
[11:49] Tadakuni
    Don't tell scary stories!
[11:51] Yoshitake
    Please! Stop!
[11:52] Hidenori
    Was that story really scary?
[11:55] Yoshitake
    I have a scary story, too.
[11:58] Hidenori
    No, this isn't a scary story competition...
[12:01] Yoshitake
    As you know, nipple hair
    is a big problem of mine.
[12:06] Hidenori
    This is the first I've heard of it.
[12:08] Yoshitake
    I tried pulling them out one by one
    with tweezers, but it was no good.
[12:11] Yoshitake
    Then, I saw that my dad forgot
    his razor in the bathroom.
[12:16] Yoshitake
    So, I thought I'd shave them all off with it.
[12:25] Yoshitake
    And ended up like this.
[12:27] Tadakuni
    Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!
[12:28] Hidenori
    Dude, that is not a scary story!
    It's a painful one!
[12:32] Yoshitake
    - Do nipples grow back?
    - Just go to a doctor!
[12:35] Tadakuni
    Here's a scary one for you...
[12:38] Hidenori
    Enough!
[12:40] Tadakuni
    The other day, some of us
    stayed at Kugihiko's place.
[12:44] Tadakuni
    We started fooling around and drank a lot.
[12:48] Tadakuni
    But it wasn't booze or anything.
SIGN    Not booze or anything.
[12:51] Tadakuni
    Then sure enough, Kugihiko
    started looking bad.
[12:56] Tadakuni
    So, I took him to the bathroom
    and looked after him.
[13:00] Tadakuni
    And there, in Kugihiko's puke...
[13:08] Tadakuni
    There was a frickin' centipede!
[13:12] Tadakuni
    I mean, those things aren't afraid of people,
    so it probably crawled in while he was asleep.
[13:16] Tadakuni
    Okay, so you're up, Hidenori.
[13:18] Hidenori
    Hold on a sec.
[13:22] Hidenori
    L-Let's leave this conversation at that.
[13:26] Yoshitake
    I'm gonna hit the can.
[13:32] Hidenori
    Seriously?
[13:33] Yoshitake
    Seriously?
[13:34] Hidenori
    Seriously?
[13:35] Yoshitake
    Seriously?
[13:40] Hidenori
    It's Tadakuni's sister!
[13:41] Yoshitake
    She was listening in.
[13:43] Hidenori
    Our turn!
[13:48] Tadakuni
    I don't think I can tell
    them I made it all up now...
[13:51] ---
    - Find one?
    - Nope.
[13:53] ---
    - Is that it?
    - No, that's just the seaweed I ate.
SIGN    High School Boys and Walking With Girls
SIGN    2nd Year Students Class A
[14:06] Hidenori
    Mornin'.
[14:12] Yoshitake
    'Sup?
[14:13] Yoshitake
    You didn't come with Tadakuni?
[14:15] Hidenori
    Huh? He isn't here yet?
[14:18] Hidenori
    He's probably off dawdling somewhere.
[14:23] Yoshitake
    What's wrong? Hidenori!
[14:26] Hidenori
    Ta-Ta-Tadakuni is...
[14:32] Yoshitake
    Tadakuni is what?
[14:41] Yoshitake
    Tadakuni is with a girl!!!
[14:44] ---
    - What?
    - Seriously?
[14:46] Student A
    It's true!
[14:47] Student B
    What gives!?
[14:49] Student C
    Is she even human?
[14:51] Motoharu
    Settle down, you punks!
[14:55] ---
    It's the hoodlum, Motoharu!
[14:57] Motoharu
    Observe. Look closely, all of you.
[15:01] Motoharu
    At everything and anything.
[15:05] Motoharu
    Look.
[15:07] Motoharu
    At first, they appear to be casually chatting,
    but then he suddenly looks away.
[15:10] Motoharu
    Proof of a break in their conversation.
[15:13] Motoharu
    Furthermore, their paces are different.
[15:15] Motoharu
    This proves they don't
    know each other's pace.
[15:18] Student A
    Oh! Who else but Motoharu, the hoodlum!
[15:21] Student B
    What uncanny powers of perception!
[15:24] Motoharu
    From these clues, we can determine
    that they have only recently met.
[15:29] Motoharu
    And are not dating.
[15:32] Motoharu
    However, that last part
    is only a matter of time.
[15:35] Motoharu
    Which means...
[15:38] Motoharu
    You all know what we must do.
[15:41] Motoharu
    Everyone, focus your
    virgin powers to the max!
[15:48] Motoharu
    Operation...
[15:49] Motoharu
    BEGIN!
SIGN    North Sanada Prefectural High School
[15:58] Motoharu
    Yo, Tadakuni.
[16:01] Tadakuni
    Oh, Motoharu.
[16:03] Tadakuni
    Sorry for being late.
[16:04] Tadakuni
    I just wasn't feeling well today.
[16:06] Motoharu
    It is cold today.
[16:08] Motoharu
    Do you know why?
[16:11] Motoharu
    Because, we're going to kill your spring.
[16:14] Tadakuni
    The hell's this about, Motoharu?
    Sure your head isn't sprung?
[16:17] Motoharu
    I'm sure you've noticed...
[16:21] Motoharu
    that you have nowhere to run.
[16:24] Motoharu
    Now then, who's that cute little
    dish standing next to you?
[16:29] Student B
    Answer me, Tadakuni.
[16:31] Girl
    Um, thank you so much.
[16:34] Tadakuni
    Oh, no problem. Keep going straight
    and you'll see the station.
[16:37] Girl
    Okay!
[16:48] ---
    She was just asking for directions!?
[16:53] Motoharu
    Well, I don't really know much about
    couples or anything like that.
[16:58] ---
    What's this guy smoking?
SIGN    High School Boys and Book-Loving Girls
[17:32] Hidenori
    I can't read a thing with this wind.
[17:35] Hidenori
    This was a mistake.
[17:37] Hidenori
    Reading at the riverbank was a bad idea.
[18:19] Hidenori
    A-AWKWARD!
[18:21] Hidenori
    Huh? What is this? Who is she?
[18:24] Hidenori
    Why isn't she saying anything?
[18:25] Hidenori
    Why did she deliberately sit near me
    when there's so much open space?
[18:29] Hidenori
    I have no idea what she wants,
    but I should say something, right?
[18:34] Hidenori
    Hey, why should I?
[18:35] Hidenori
    In any event, I'm not the kind of guy
    who can smoothly talk to girls.
[18:42] Hidenori
    The sunset is beautiful, isn't it?
[18:44] Hidenori
    Oh crap!
[18:45] Hidenori
    That phrase is way too
    cliché for this situation.
[18:49] Hidenori
    Right! This situation!
[18:51] Hidenori
    This is a romantic situation where a girl meets a
    boy reading a book alone on a riverbank at sunset.
[18:58] Hidenori
    I'll bet this chick is expecting an unrealistic
    "boy meets girl" type of thing.
[19:04] Hidenori
    Oh yeah, totally.
[19:08] Hidenori
    In that case, I need a cool one-liner.
[19:11] Hidenori
    The only reason I'm reading out here is cuz my
    friends are at work, so I have some free time.
[19:17] Hidenori
    I'm just a normal boy. I have no
    real common ground to stand on.
[19:21] Hidenori
    Whatever...
[19:23] Hidenori
    Anyway, I can't just dash her expectations.
[19:26] Hidenori
    Okay, here comes something cool...
[19:35] Hidenori
    The winds are lashing out today.
[19:38] Hidenori
    What!? I suddenly want to die.
[19:41] Hidenori
    It's not even like I'm embarrassed
    or anything. I just, like...
[19:44] Hidenori
    want to die.
[19:46] Hidenori
    Well, what's done is done.
[19:48] Hidenori
    She looks really happy.
[19:50] Hidenori
    I think my mind almost
    collapsed, but I said it.
[19:53] Hidenori
    Okay, so now how will you respond?
[20:00] Literary Girl
    However, this wind is softly weeping.
[20:05] Hidenori
    Aww man, this chick's lost it!
[20:09] Hidenori
    Sorry, but that's all I've got.
[20:12] Hidenori
    I've reached my limit.
[20:14] Hidenori
    Truthfully, I was happy when
    you sat down behind me.
[20:19] Hidenori
    But it appears I have no imagination, and I
    can't stand being trapped here anymore.
[20:25] Hidenori
    So I've already called in for a rescue.
[20:30] Hidenori
    Come, warriors! Destroy this barrier!
[20:35] Hidenori
    They're here! That was quick!
[20:38] Yoshitake
    We must hurry, Hidenori.
[20:41] Yoshitake
    It appears these winds have brought
    something wicked to town.
[20:44] Hidenori
    So today of all days you've
    decided to be a jokester!?
[20:49] Hidenori
    Oh, so now you get it? Die!
[20:52] Hidenori
    Whoa, now she seems super happy!
[20:54] Hidenori
    Enough! Take me back to reality!
[21:02] Hidenori
    I'm sure you've fulfilled your wish of wanting to
    talk to a lone boy on a riverbank at sunset.
[21:07] Hidenori
    Now, I can clear this weird
    atmosphere and be on my way.
[21:10] Hidenori
    With a realistic phrase!
[21:17] Hidenori
    Come, before these winds die down.
[21:20] Hidenori
    What am I saying!?
[21:22] Hidenori
    Argh, whatever. Looks like I'm
    going the distance on this one.
[21:26] Tadakuni
    Wait!
[21:28] Hidenori
    Ah, the other member of
    my rescue squad, Tadakuni!
[21:32] Tadakuni
    Dude, the store over there has
    french fries for half off!
[21:36] Hidenori
    - We gotta hit some of that!
    - Get a sense of the scene, man!
[21:39] Tadakuni
    - Why?
    - Maybe he did, after all...
[21:44] Hidenori
    What's this?
[21:47] Hidenori
    Ah, a novel you've written.
[21:52] Hidenori
    I see.
[21:53] Hidenori
    A love story where a boy
    meets a girl on a riverbank.
[21:58] Yoshitake
    The main character can manipulate
    the powers of the wind.
[22:01] Hidenori
    Wow, this matches surprisingly well with
    the scene just now. What a coincidence...
[22:06] Hidenori
    In other words, this chick,
    in order to realize her goals...
[22:10] Hidenori
    visualized me as her main
    character and sat next to me.
[22:15] Hidenori
    Well, that's all fine and well.
[22:18] Hidenori
    However, the problem is that she gave her main
    character one particular defining characteristic.
[22:24] Hidenori
    That being...
[22:26] Hidenori
    That he looks like some
    kind of lonely, dour otaku!
[22:30] Yoshitake
    Well, you do, don't you?
[22:35] [SONG] ---
    The winds are lashing out today
[22:47] [SONG] ---
    However, this wind is softly weeping
[22:59] [SONG] ---
    It appears these winds have brought
[23:11] [SONG] ---
    Something wicked to town
[23:17] [SONG] ---
    Come, before these winds die down
[23:32] [SONG] ---
    
[23:33] ---
    Dude, the store over there has french fries
    for half off! We gotta hit that!
[23:37] ---
    Why?
SIGN    Next time: High School Boys and Setting Out on a Quest, etc.
[23:55] ---
    All right, there'll be a little more
    of this and that next week.
SIGN    Sorry, the ending wasn't finished on time.
    The ending theme, Ohisama, by Amesaki annainin,
[24:00] Hidenori
    Daily Lives of High School Boys was halfassedly
    brought to you thanks to our sponsors.
SIGN    will be featured starting next week. Please look forward to it!
[24:07] Tadakuni
    I thought I told you not
    to say "halfassedly"!
SIGN    Watch us again next week.