9 - Festival! Aho Girl!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Part 31
SIGN    Cultural Festival
[01:02] Teacher
    Now then, the cultural
    festival is approaching,
SIGN    Cultural Festival
[01:04] Teacher
    so we need to select a committee member.
[01:06] Teacher
    Would anyone like to—
[01:07] Yoshiko
    Me!
[01:08] Akuru
    Idiot. Do you even know what
    a committee member does?
[01:12] Yoshiko
    Nope! Not a clue!
[01:13] Akuru
    Then why did you volunteer?
[01:15] Yoshiko
    It was an impulse!
[01:16] Yoshiko
    Also, what's a cultural festival again?
[01:19] Akuru
    Cut it out.
[01:20] Sayaka
    Remember when we run cafés and
    haunted houses out of our classrooms?
[01:24] Yoshiko
    Oh! I wanna do that!
[01:26] Akuru
    Then do it.
[01:27] Akuru
    If you can.
[01:28] Yoshiko
    Doing it!
[01:30] Emura
    Hey.
[01:31] Emura
    You know our class's thing is going
    to tank if this idiot girl's in charge.
[01:36] Akuru
    Cultural festivals are mere entertainment.
[01:38] Emura
    What?!
[01:39] Akuru
    It's a good opportunity to let Yoshiko
    fail and get a sense for her own idiocy.
[01:43] Akuru
    Is there a problem with that?
[01:45] Emura
    It's the cultural festival!
[01:46] Emura
    Where we come together as one, do all
    sorts of stuff, make it all awesome,
[01:49] Emura
    and have a party after!
[01:51] Emura
    I've been looking forward to this all year!
[01:54] Akuru
    Such a pure heart...
SIGN    Cultural Festival
[01:55] Teacher
    Um, we're in the middle of homeroom...
[01:57] Akuru
    In the first place, you talk all
    through class, you never study,
[02:02] Akuru
    and you don't do anything
    students are supposed to do.
[02:04] Akuru
    What gives you the right to
    enjoy the cultural festival?
[02:08] Emura
    I-I have every right!
[02:09] Emura
    B-Because... you know... like...
[02:12] Akuru
    Your thinking speed shows how
    little you actually study.
[02:17] Emura
    O-Oh, and I suppose you think you're smart?!
[02:21] Akuru
    I am.
[02:22] Akuru
    Smarter than you, at least.
[02:23] Emura
    Ew, hear that? He totally
    doesn't have any friends.
[02:27] Shiina
    Oh, and that's why he
    hates cultural festivals?
[02:30] Emura
    You poor kid! God, that's hilarious!
[02:32] Yoshiko
    A-kun's got me!
[02:34] Emura
    God, that's hilarious!
[02:38] Emura
    They're a perfect couple!
[02:40] Shiina
    A loner and an idiot!
[02:42] Hiiragi
    Have fun looking after her forever.
[02:44] Akuru
    Shut your freaking traps,
[02:46] Akuru
    you three uglies.
[02:47] Emura
    Huh? What'd you call us, loner?!
[02:49] Akuru
    I called you ugly, you ugly bitch!
[02:51] Emura
    H-Huh? Wh-Who're you calling ugly?!
[02:54] Akuru
    What, did you think you
    were even remotely pretty?
[02:58] Emura
    I-I didn't say that...
[03:01] Akuru
    Then you're ugly, all right!
[03:03] Emura
    B-But... I thought...
[03:07] Emura
    Jeez, come on...
[03:09] Emura
    Why do you have to be so mean?
[03:13] Shiina
    Why'd you make her cry, asshole?!
[03:15] Hiiragi
    I can't believe you.
[03:16] Akuru
    N-No, I— Wait—
[03:18] Emura
    I hate this!
[03:19] Emura
    I don't want to let things go his way!
[03:22] Girls
    Uh-huh.
SIGN    Cultural Festival
[03:27] Teacher
    So who's going to be on the committee—
[03:30] Both
    I wanna do it!
[03:33] Yoshiko
    Let's work together.
[03:35] Girls
    Hell no, damn you!
SIGN    Committee Member Election
SIGN    Hanabatake
SIGN    Emura
SIGN    Part 32
[03:44] Shiina
    Aren't we kinda behind schedule?
[03:47] Emura
    Yeah, we might be.
[03:48] Yoshiko
    Ha, ha, ha.
[03:49] Yoshiko
    Then why not stay overnight to work?
[03:52] Emura
    Huh? How do we do that?
[03:54] Yoshiko
    In secret!
[03:55] Girls
    Then keep it down!
[04:02] Shiina
    All right. Everyone's gone home.
[04:04] Yoshiko
    I brought a ton of stuff!
[04:06] Yoshiko
    Like a flashlight for exploring
    the school at night!
[04:10] Yoshiko
    And cards we can play with!
[04:11] Emura
    What the hell'd you come here to do?!
[04:13] Yoshiko
    And...
[04:14] Yoshiko
    a TV and a VS4!
[04:17] Emura
    She seriously just came to play!
[04:19] Emura
    W-Well, exploring the school at
    night sounds kinda exciting.
[04:23] Emura
    If we manage to get caught up,
    we could play a little...
[04:26] Shiina
    We're working all night
    until morning, damn it!
[04:29] Emura
    Huh?
[04:31] Emura
    R-Right. We don't have time for fun.
[04:36] Shiina
    Uh... Huh?
[04:37] Yoshiko
    Let's explore the school!
[04:39] Yoshiko
    Holy crap, there's no one here!
[04:41] Yoshiko
    I feel like I've got the
    whole world in my hands!
[04:42] Emura
    H-Hey, wait!
[04:44] Emura
    I'm gonna go catch her!
[04:46] Shiina
    O-Okay.
[04:47] Emura
    I'm not doing it because I want to go, too!
[04:49] Shiina
    Right. We know.
[04:52] Emura
    G-Get back here!
[04:54] Yoshiko
    I'm gonna go in here!
[04:58] Emura
    Wait, that's the boys' bathroom!
[04:59] Yoshiko
    Oh, so this is a urinal?!
[05:02] Emura
    What the hell are you doing?!
[05:03] Yoshiko
    It's crazy! Come in and see!
[05:05] Emura
    What?!
[05:06] Yoshiko
    You might never get another
    chance to see these!
[05:08] Emura
    W-Well, I guess not...
[05:13] Emura
    You'd have a full view of the guy beside you!
[05:15] Yoshiko
    They wanna show each other! Boys are crazy!
[05:17] Emura
    I-Is that how it works?
[05:19] Yoshiko
    Hey, hey! Let's pretend to pee standing up!
[05:19] Shiina
    Hey...
[05:21] Shiina
    Let's get back to work.
[05:21] Emura
    What?!
[05:21] Yoshiko
    I'll be "it"!
[05:22] Emura
    What?! Wait—
[05:23] Emura
    Oh.
[05:23] Emura
    R-Right!
[05:24] Yoshiko
    All right! Let's bust out the VS4!
[05:26] Emura
    You mean work on cultural festival stuff!
[05:28] Yoshiko
    You don't wanna play?!
[05:30] Emura
    I-I never said that...
[05:32] Yoshiko
    Make up your mind!
[05:33] Emura
    I wanna play!
[05:36] Hiiragi
    W-Well, the night is young...
[05:39] Shiina
    We could play a little.
[05:42] Emura
    Really?!
[05:46] Both
    Grinning from ear to ear.
SIGN    ~ 1 Hour Later ~
[05:53] Emura
    This is pretty fun.
SIGN    ~ 3 Hours Later ~
[05:57] Shiina
    W-Well, should we get to work now?
[06:01] Emura
    R-Right.
[06:03] Yoshiko
    Seriously?! But we're right at the best part!
[06:08] Emura
    W-We'll get to it in a minute.
[06:11] Shiina
    O-Okay...
SIGN    ~ 7 Hours Later ~
[06:15] Shiina
    It's dawn, you know.
[06:17] Shiina
    We should really...
[06:19] Yoshiko
    We're almost at the final boss.
[06:23] Emura
    But, uh...
[06:26] Emura
    We can't, right?
[06:29] Shiina
    We can just stay overnight again tomorrow.
[06:32] Emura
    I didn't think about that!
[06:38] Emura
    W-We beat it.
[06:40] Yoshiko
    Staying overnight at school
    with friends is super fun!
[06:44] Emura
    Yeah!
[06:44] Emura
    Wait, who said I was friends with you?!
SIGN    No work was done the following night, either.
SIGN    Maid Café
SIGN    Part 33
[06:57] Yoshiko
    Cultural festival time!
[06:58] Sayaka
    Let's do our best!
SIGN    1-2 Maid Café
[07:00] Yoshiko
    Café time!
[07:01] Yoshiko
    Maid time!
[07:03] Yoshiko
    Maid A-kun time!
[07:07] Emura
    Get up, idiot. Quit fooling around.
[07:10] Emura
    It's about to start.
[07:11] Yoshiko
    Woohoo! Finally!
[07:12] PA
    The cultural festival is officially open.
[07:15] Sayaka
    Welcome, master!
[07:18] Yoshiko
    We've got banana crêpes!
[07:20] Ryuuichi
    Sis!
[07:21] Ryuuichi
    Allow me to contribute to your profits!
[07:24] Yoshiko
    Ooh! Thanks!
[07:27] Yoshiko
    Tarou-kun!
[07:28] Ryuuichi
    It's Ryuuichi!
[07:30] Yoshiko
    Tarou-kun!
[07:31] Ryuuichi
    Thank you! It's Ryuuichi!
SIGN    Part 34
[07:39] Yoshiko
    The cultural festival is fun!
[07:43] Yoshiko
    W-Wait, that's...
[07:44] Boy
    I like you!
[07:46] President
    I'm sorry.
[07:47] Yoshiko
    You're breaking my heart!
[07:49] President
    Hanabatake-san? What are you doing here?
[07:52] Yoshiko
    You worked up every fiber of
    courage you could, didn't you?
[07:55] Boy
    Y-Yes...
[07:56] Yoshiko
    Since when have you liked her?
[07:58] Boy
    For the last three years.
[07:59] Yoshiko
    Did you want to fondle those boobs?
[08:01] Boy
    Yes, I did!
[08:03] Yoshiko
    Let him fondle them!
[08:05] President
    Why should I?!
[08:06] Yoshiko
    What would you do if the person
    you liked rejected you?
[08:11] President
    I-If Akutsu-kun rejected me?!
[08:16] Akuru
    I don't give a damn about you.
[08:18] President
    Say it isn't so!
[08:19] Yoshiko
    And if that person liked me instead?
[08:23] President
    No!
[08:26] President
    Th-That would be... too hard.
[08:29] Yoshiko
    What would you wish for then?
[08:32] President
    At least... At the very least, a memory...
[08:36] President
    A kiss to remember him by.
[08:40] Yoshiko
    Now you understand.
[08:42] Yoshiko
    So please...
[08:43] Yoshiko
    Let him fondle your boobs.
[08:46] President
    That's his memory?
[08:47] President
    B-But a kiss and a fondle
    are far too different.
[08:50] Yoshiko
    You fool!
[08:51] Yoshiko
    Women seek kisses as memories,
    and men seek boobs!
[08:56] Yoshiko
    If you truly understand the pain of
    heartbreak without even a memory,
[09:01] Yoshiko
    then break the chain of sorrow
    with your massive rack!
[09:05] Yoshiko
    Just one feel! Just one feel is enough!
[09:08] President
    Oh, fine!
[09:10] President
    Bring it on!
[09:12] Yoshiko
    That's a good girl!
[09:13] Yoshiko
    Now come, boy!
[09:15] Boy
    Yes! Thank you very much!
[09:23] Akuru
    What are you people doing?
[09:36] President
    Hi-yah!
[09:39] President
    N-N-Nothing!
[09:42] Yoshiko
    Are you okay? Hang in there!
[09:44] Boy
    Th-That was fine, too.
[09:47] Akuru
    What the hell?
SIGN    Part 35
[09:55] Sayaka
    The cultural festival was
    a success! Way to go, us!
[09:57] Yoshiko
    Yay!
[09:59] Emura
    What's this jerk doing here?
[10:01] Akuru
    I could say the same to you.
[10:03] Sayaka
    A-All right! Let's have some fun!
[10:06] Yoshiko
    Yay!
[10:07] Emura
    Moron.
[10:08] Akuru
    Get lost, idiot.
[10:10] Sayaka
    Can't you guys try to get along?
[10:12] Yoshiko
    Yay!
[10:15] Hiiragi
    Wow, he started studying.
[10:17] Shiina
    Loners have no idea how to socialize.
[10:19] Akuru
    Shut up, uglies.
[10:20] Emura
    Why don't you try and say that again?!
[10:23] Emura
    Who the hell do you think you are?!
[10:23] Akuru
    What, you're deaf, too?
    I called you ugly, ugly!
[10:25] Sayaka
    I just wanted everyone to get along.
[10:29] Sayaka
    But this...
[10:30] Sayaka
    But this...
[10:32] Sayaka
    Damn it!
[10:39] Emura
    This one's a beer!
[10:41] Hiiragi
    They brought us the wrong order.
[10:42] Shiina
    But she hasn't drunk any.
[10:44] Emura
    She couldn't have...
[10:46] Akuru
    ...gotten drunk off fumes?
[10:47] Sayaka
    You just keep fighting!
    You make me want to cry!
[10:51] Sayaka
    Wait, I'm already crying!
    Point it out, damn you!
[10:54] Akuru
    She's that kind of drunk...
[10:55] Sayaka
    I try to break up your fighting,
    but all you do is ignore me.
[10:58] Sayaka
    None of you have any respect for me!
[11:01] Yoshiko
    That's not true!
[11:04] Sayaka
    Yoshiko-chan...
[11:06] Yoshiko
    You're cute, and you're nice,
[11:08] Yoshiko
    and you're flatter than a board!
[11:14] Sayaka
    It's always my boobs!
[11:16] Sayaka
    No one respects me because
    I don't have boobs?
[11:19] Sayaka
    You make me want to cry!
[11:23] Akuru
    Y-You're already crying.
[11:25] Sayaka
    Way to point out the obvious!
[11:27] Akuru
    What was I supposed to do?!
[11:29] Emura
    H-Hey, don't take it so hard.
[11:31] Sayaka
    They're so small, it's funny!
[11:33] Sayaka
    Yes, that's right...
[11:34] Sayaka
    Just look at my boobs and laugh!
[11:36] Two
    This isn't funny!
[11:38] Sayaka
    Come on, everybody laugh!
[11:40] Sayaka
    There'll finally be peace in here,
    and we can all get along!
[11:45] Emura
    Hey, you've actually got nice volume.
[11:49] Sayaka
    I padded the hell out of them!
[11:53] Girls
    This isn't funny...
[11:55] Sayaka
    Just look! Amazingly flat, right?
[11:57] Yoshiko
    I understand! I understand the amazingness!
[12:00] Yoshiko
    They're truly a wonder!
[12:02] Yoshiko
    I christen them the Sayakan Plain!
[12:04] Yoshiko
    Flat as far as the eye can see!
[12:06] Sayaka
    Right?! Right?!
[12:14] Sayaka
    I want to cry.
SIGN    Karaoke
[12:17] Sayaka
    I'm already crying!
[12:20] Girls
    We're sorry.
SIGN    Middle School Year 2
SIGN    Middle School Year 3
SIGN    High School Year 1
SIGN    Drive! Aho Girl
[12:25] Yoshiko
    Next time: "Drive! Aho Girl!"