E9 - I'm Gonna Go Down in Shinobi History

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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Nice
    to
    meet
    you
    Ugly
SIGN    Idiot
SIGN    4 Lyfe
SIGN    Trash
SIGN    Learning is
    fundamental
SIGN    I'm the strongest Invincible
SIGN    Takuro
SIGN    Bald
    Boss
SIGN    Furinkazan
SIGN    Demon For Real
SIGN    Dumb
    ass
SIGN    Don't fuck with me!
[00:12] Eita
    Ugh, this is really bad...
[00:16] Eita
    I'm actually at Yankii High.
[00:19] Yamada
    Eita-kun.
[00:22] Yamada
    Hand.
[00:24] Eita
    Huh?
[00:25] Eita
    Oh, sure.
[00:27] Yamada
    Okay, here goes.
[00:30] Eita
    Huh?
[00:34] Yamada
    Help!
[00:36] Yamada
    Someone! Help me!
[00:38] Eita
    What the hell is happening right now?!
[00:41] Eita
    Settle down, Eita. Keep your cool, Eita!
[00:46] Eita
    I've got a very unique
    situation going on here.
[00:49] Eita
    Let's compartmentalize
    while also avoiding reality...
[00:52] Eita
    If I focus purely on the positives
    for me, then right now...
[00:57] Eita
    the fact remains that I am groping the boobs
    of the school's hottest girl, Yamada-san.
[01:03] Yamada
    Someone!
[01:06] Eita
    Huh... Feels funny, though.
[01:11] Eita
    Yeah, I was expecting something
    like Kawado-san's boobs...
[01:14] Eita
    Not that I've touched them, but I expected
    something like... the softness of rich soil.
[01:21] Eita
    But these aren't like that!
[01:24] Eita
    They're hard! Like rocks!
[01:26] Eita
    I feel a tension, like I'm
    rock-climbing without a lifeline.
[01:29] Eita
    These things are my only hope for survival!
[01:34] Eita
    Not that I've ever gone rock-climbing.
[01:37] Kawarada
    What's this?
[01:38] Kawarada
    Hey, kid! What are you doing?
[01:41] Eita
    Uh, well, this is actually...
[01:46] Yamada
    Help!
[01:51] Eita
    I can't shake the feeling that I've stuck my
    nose into something extremely dangerous.
SIGN    Episode 9: "I'm Gonna Go Down in Shinobi History"
[03:31] Ranran
    The sun feels so distant...
[03:34] Ranran
    It really is a subterranean fortress.
[03:36] Ranran
    They play up the Nin-Nin theme by
    claiming 22 basement levels, but...
[03:39] Ranran
    The truth is, nobody knows
    how deep it actually goes.
[03:42] Ranran
    I wonder how many ninja will
    be delving into this hellhole
[03:46] Ranran
    to endure nightmare missions today...
[03:58] Taira
    Working overnight?
[03:59] Ranran
    Hey, Manager Taira.
    This'll be night three for me.
[04:03] Ranran
    Gotta say, things are already looking bad.
[04:05] Ranran
    Their gear outperforms our
    Marishiten in every way.
[04:09] Ranran
    Considering our latest model is 4.0,
[04:12] Ranran
    I'd say they're on 5.0.
[04:15] Taira
    I don't get technobabble. Any weaknesses?
[04:18] Ranran
    Nope.
[04:19] Ranran
    First of all, the latest
    model of Marishiten, 4.0,
[04:23] Ranran
    was designed with a focus on mobility,
    with domestic usage in mind.
[04:26] Ranran
    It's a lightly armed model.
[04:27] Ranran
    Its bullet- and blade-proofing
    aren't that strong.
[04:30] Ranran
    Compared to the 3.5, a heavy-armor
    type developed for use during war,
[04:35] Ranran
    its design principles are different.
[04:37] Ranran
    And then there's the enemy's new model,
[04:39] Ranran
    which has all the strengths of both,
    and none of the weaknesses.
[04:42] Ranran
    I find myself once again wondering
    how their tech manages to outdo ours.
[04:48] Taira
    Break it down in simple terms.
[04:50] Ranran
    Look here.
[04:53] Ranran
    It took analysis from the
    Ninja Lab's Rappa supercomputer
[04:56] Ranran
    to get us something more substantial.
[04:59] Ranran
    The suit takes a blow from a
    super-high-strength NIN ninja sword,
[05:03] Ranran
    but its impact protection
    system is strong enough
[05:05] Ranran
    that it doesn't even leave a scratch.
[05:07] Ranran
    It even maintains its invisibility.
[05:11] Taira
    What else?
[05:14] Ranran
    Manger Taira... If we're going to do this,
    we should head to the nap room.
[05:20] Taira
    And you're gonna update
    the front lines with this intel?
[05:22] Ranran
    Yep. About to send the data
    to Chief Ninja Kato...
[05:28] Ranran
    Actually, I might not be lucky enough
    to send it in time for the UN attack.
[05:34] Ranran
    Or maybe a portion of the
    data could be corrupted...
[05:39] Ranran
    What do you think?
[05:42] Taira
    Go ahead and send everything to him.
[05:45] Taira
    If he still dies, then that's that.
[05:47] Ranran
    Sure, by your command.
[05:51] Ranran
    I don't mind Chief Ninja Kato,
    but I really hope Onikobe dies.
[05:56] Ranran
    That said... something about this is bugging me.
[06:01] Ranran
    UN's invisibility suit is clearly over-spec.
[06:06] Ranran
    Like it has some other purpose...
[06:13] Ozu
    Hey, Hachiya-kun? Ozu here.
[06:15] Ozu
    Sorry to bug you during a mission.
    You good to talk?
SIGN    Nurse's Office
[06:19] Hachiya
    It's nice to hear from you, Master.
[06:22] Hachiya
    I'm good. I was just
    finishing morning practice.
[06:25] Ozu
    There's a NIN Alert,
[06:28] Ozu
    so Kodan High School is about
    to become a combat zone.
[06:32] Hachiya
    I know.
[06:34] Ozu
    Normally, you wouldn't be on
     the scene for something like this.
[06:38] Ozu
    I'd rather pull you out ASAP, but...
[06:41] Hachiya
    Considering whose grandson I am...
[06:44] Hachiya
    It's important that I show up in the field
    so the other genin don't get unruly.
[06:50] Ozu
    Well, if you do encounter an enemy,
    be sure to run for it.
[06:54] Ozu
    Push comes to shove,
[06:55] Ozu
    use the Rear Support Maneuvers
    Division 2 girl you're with as a shield.
[07:00] Hachiya
    You don't have to tell me. I know.
[07:03] Hachiya
    And I fully intend to, Master.
[07:07] Ozu
    You gotta survive, kid.
    You're my ticket to getting promoted.
[07:13] Ozu
    The grandson of Tara,
    one of the seven NIN leaders.
[07:18] Suzuki
    Yo, Ninja Lab's loosest &@$$^,
    what the hell kept you?
[07:22] Suzuki
    What the fuck am I dealing with here?
[07:24] Suzuki
    Your message? Yeah, I read it. It was bullshit.
[07:27] Suzuki
    All you did was yap about how
    good the enemy's weapons are.
[07:30] Suzuki
    I want weaknesses, damn it.
[07:34] Suzuki
    The fuck you mean, "there are none"?!
[07:36] Homeroom Teacher
    You there!
[07:38] Homeroom Teacher
    The use of smartphones on
    school grounds is prohibited.
[07:41] Suzuki
    What did you say?
[07:44] Suzuki
    He's not quite Yoshida-sensei,
    but he's rugged, too!
[07:47] Suzuki
    His old man smell isn't bad, either.
[07:50] Homeroom Teacher
    Come on, now...
[07:52] Suzuki
    I'm so sorry, Sensei.
[07:54] Suzuki
    My maternal grandmother doesn't have
    long left... and I just had to talk to her.
[08:00] Homeroom Teacher
    Well, in that case, I guess...
[08:03] Suzuki
    I really appreciate it.
[08:04] Homeroom Teacher
    Just don't make it obvious.
[08:06] Suzuki
    Okay.
[08:08] Suzuki
    Come on, &@$$^ cheese,
    you gotta have something for me.
[08:11] Suzuki
    This is why everyone thinks
    the Ninja Lab is useless!
[08:15] Ranran
    Come on, Senpai, don't be mean.
[08:18] Ranran
    I don't have any &@$$^ cheese.
    I'll even let you smell to make sure.
[08:22] Ranran
    I hate to say it, but NIN is at a
     complete technological disadvantage.
[08:27] Ranran
    You're the only one who's ever fought
    that new UN suit and survived.
[08:33] Ranran
    I don't think it was a coincidence
    you dodged that first strike.
[08:37] Ranran
    Is there anything that you noticed about it?
[08:41] Ranran
    Maybe in terms of smell?
[08:43] Suzuki
    Smell, huh?
[08:44] Suzuki
    I wasn't really paying attention,
    since it didn't smell like old man.
[08:48] Ranran
    By the way, Senpai,
    is Onikobe-senpai with you?
[08:51] Suzuki
    Yeah, she's right next to me.
[08:56] Ranran
    This school will be your tomb!
[08:58] Ranran
    Die, Onikobe!
[09:01] Onikobe
    Does she hate me or something?
[09:04] Suzuki
    Considering you're the one who popped
    her eye, I doubt she likes you.
[09:09] Onikobe
    I only did it because she was annoying.
SIGN    Chief Ninja Kato
    Call
[09:13] Kato
    Onikobe. Suzuki. Are you in position?
[09:16] Onikobe
    Yes, Chief Ninja Kato. We're ready.
[09:20] Kato
    Good. Don't even consider trying
    to take the enemy alive.
[09:24] Kato
    Their death is our top priority.
[09:26] Kato
    During the operation,
    you will not be accountable for anything
[09:31] Kato
    that you do in front of a Ninja Tribunal.
[09:34] Kato
    The ROE have been lifted.
[09:44] Kato
    In addition, for this mission,
    I will be joining you.
[09:52] Azuma
    Damn it, Eita, you little shit...
[09:55] Azuma
    My dad is Azuma, the former*
    Nerima assemblyman!
[09:58] Azuma
    Don't think you'll get away
    with what you did.
[10:02] Azuma
    The bullying begins anew today.
[10:16] Azuma
    I wonder what I should do to him...
[10:19] Azuma
    Maybe for... a start...
[10:25] Azuma
    Huh?
[10:27] Azuma
    Why...
[10:29] Azuma
    Why can I see... my own... back?
[10:33] Azuma
    Wha...
[10:35] Saruta
    All good. I killed someone and kept my cool.
[10:38] Saruta
    Hell, I enjoyed it.
[10:40] Saruta
    Nekohira... I'm gonna go
    down in shinobi history.
[10:48] Saruta
    Will I be able to collect a hundred heads?
[10:56] Noguchi
    I've been standing here this whole
    time and he hasn't said a thing.
[11:00] Noguchi
    It's so awkward.
[11:03] Noguchi
    Come on... Gotta talk about something...
[11:06] Noguchi
    H-Hey, Director, you've been
    working here for a long time, right?
[11:11] Director
    I have.
[11:12] Noguchi
    I heard rumors about some caves
    in the woods behind the school.
[11:20] Noguchi
    Sorry!
[11:23] Director
    Well.
[11:25] Director
    It looks like both NIN and Rear Support
    Maneuvers Division 2 have given up on this place.
[11:30] Noguchi
    U-Um...
[11:34] Director
    There are caves, but the entrance
    is on school grounds.
[11:38] Noguchi
    Huh?
[11:40] Director
    You should use them to escape.
[11:42] Director
    The campus is already surrounded.
    It'd be dangerous to leave any other way.
[11:48] Director
    Don't get swept up
    with the other students.
[11:51] Director
    Survive, and tell people about this disaster.
[11:56] Noguchi
    What the hell?
    Both the director and Kuro-kun...
[12:00] Noguchi
    What's going to happen?
[12:04] Ranran
    Suzuki-senpai!
[12:06] Ranran
    UN's on the scene.
[12:08] Suzuki
    I need to know the situation, now.
[12:10] Ranran
    'Kay!
[12:12] Ranran
    Tengen, our surveillance satellite,
    has the footage.
[12:15] Ranran
    There's a decapitated male student.
[12:19] Ranran
    Looks like he's already on school grounds.
[12:22] Ranran
    Caution advised.
[12:24] Suzuki
    Roger.
[12:25] Ranran
    If either of you
[12:26] Ranran
    can land a GPS marker on UN during battle,
[12:31] Ranran
    Escape will be able to kill them
    via a saturated bombing attack.
[12:36] Suzuki
    And if we can't?
[12:38] Ranran
    In that case, we'll use the GPS coordinates
    for the two of you as targets.
[12:43] Ranran
    This will also be the case
    if you two are incapacitated.
[12:47] Suzuki
    So we'd better kill UN ourselves, then.
[12:51] Suzuki
    Time for work, Onikobe.
[12:53] Teacher
    Lunch break is over!
[12:57] Teacher
    Anyone still out here?
[13:16] Saruta
    Man, they don't actually roll that well.
[13:19] Saruta
    School, huh? Never did like it.
[13:22] Saruta
    Whole place is suffocating.
[13:25] Saruta
    I remember during ninja school,
    on my way to class,
[13:28] Saruta
    I'd kick any stones in the road...
[13:32] Saruta
    Always had my gaze downcast.
[13:35] Rear Ender 1
    Hey, Fatty-take!
[13:37] Rear Ender 1
    How the hell do you come back with a somen bun
[13:39] Rear Ender 1
    when I specifically asked for a yakisoba bun?
[13:41] Rear Ender 1
    You see the problem?
[13:43] Fatty-take
    It's just... when lunch break is almost over...
[13:46] Fatty-take
    the most popular stuff is sold out—
[13:48] Rear Ender 1
    Did I ask you for excuses, Fatty-take?
[13:51] Rear Ender 2
    She's been in a real mood ever since
    Mako-chan took up with that NIN guy.
[13:56] Rear Ender 1
    This creep looks like he'd
    love it if I slugged him.
[13:59] Fatty-take
    N-No, not at all! Be my guest!
[14:11] Rear Ender 1
    Is this NIN?
[14:13] Rear Ender 2
    What's going on here?
[14:14] Rear Ender 2
    Marishiten that are used domestically
    shouldn't be able to go fully invisible!
[14:22] Rear Ender 1
    Don't move, Fatty-take.
[14:23] Fatty-take
    R-Right!
[14:24] Rear Ender 1
    Contact Mako-chan right now!
[14:27] Rear Ender 2
    Right!
[14:35] Fatty-take
    H-Huh? You... don't weigh much, do you?
[15:01] Saruta
    You get a ten-second head start.
[15:03] Saruta
    If I catch you again, you're dead.
[15:09] Saruta
    That should kick the panic off.
[15:12] Saruta
    First step is to sow chaos in the school.
[15:16] Saruta
    They used to have me running errands, too...
[15:20] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Y'know, when I become a jonin,
[15:24] (Flashback) Nekohira
    I'm gonna ban the use of cats as weapons.
[15:28] (Flashback) Saruta
    Nekohira... do you honestly
    think you can make jonin?
[15:34] (Flashback) Nekohira
    What's the harm in talking
    about our... dreams?
[15:43] (Flashback) Nekohira
    Ow!
[15:45] (Flashback) Juro
    Saruta. Nekohira.
[15:48] (Flashback) Juro
    Didn't I tell you guys to go buy
    hyorogan at the school store?
[15:55] (Flashback) Juro
    You've got thirty seconds
    to buy it and get back here.
[15:58] (Flashback) Juro
    If you can't manage that...
[16:01] (Flashback) Juro
    you're dead.
[16:04] Saruta
    I'll never forget those eyes.
[16:06] Saruta
    This calls for more... louder... chaos.
[16:15] Saruta
    Okay, everyone in your seats!
[16:18] Saruta
    Oh, I guess you're already sitting.
[16:21] Saruta
    Before class starts, your teacher
    has something to tell you.
[16:25] Saruta
    It turns out he left his body
    in the shoe lockers!
[16:31] Saruta
    Well, shit. Is this conformity in action?
[16:35] Saruta
    Not gonna react? Even a little?
[16:38] Saruta
    Are your brains working?
[16:40] Saruta
    Do these kids not know how to
    think or act for themselves?
[16:45] Saruta
    Oh, well. I blame the system.
[16:53] Students
    Something's there! Something is in there!
[16:56] Students
    This is bad!
[16:59] Students
    Tae-chan!
[17:09] Girl
    Get a move on already! Go!
[17:11] Boy
    Shut the fuck up!
[17:25] Saruta
    Down we go...
[17:38] Saruta
    Aw, man. The boys' restroom?
[17:43] Saruta
    You're not a lucky kid, are you?
[17:47] Saruta
    Well, it is what it is.
[17:58] Saruta
    Never mind. You get to live.
[18:02] Saruta
    You won't have to eat in the can anymore.
[18:05] Saruta
    Hell, as the sole survivor, the press
    is gonna be banging down your door.
[18:15] Balding Teacher
    I don't think I'm getting any signal.
SIGN    Faculty Room
[18:18] Homeroom
    You, too?
[18:19] Fatty-take
    Excuse me...
[18:20] Homeroom
    Come on, Fatty-take!
[18:22] Homeroom
    Class is already—
[18:25] Fatty-take
    It's just... I-I think an invisible man...
    is killing everybody.
[18:32] Homeroom
    Don't move, Fatty-take!
[18:34] Students
    No more!
[18:36] Students
    I don't wanna die!
    I don't wanna die!
[18:38] Suzuki
    Shit. The panic's already set in.
[18:46] VP
    This is the vice principal
    with a message for all students.
[18:50] VP
    I've been informed that there is
    an intruder on school grounds.
[18:54] VP
    For safety's sake, all students are
    to evacuate to the courtyard.
[19:00] Suzuki
    That's just what he wants.
[19:02] VP
    Please, do not rush,
    follow your teachers' directions and—
[19:08] Director
    This message is for all students.
[19:10] Director
    The intruder on school grounds
    was a false report.
[19:13] VP
    Wh-Who is that talking?!
[19:13] Director
    Please remain in your classrooms.
[19:16] Director
    I repeat, the reporters
    of an intruder were false.
[19:20] Students
    What the hell?
[19:20] Director
    Please remain in your classrooms.
[19:22] Students
    Who made the report?
[19:23] Students
    What a pain in the ass...
[19:25] Director
    This message is for NIN.
    The UN has moved to a different building.
[19:30] Director
    If you don't pincer him, he'll get away.
[19:33] Director
    If you're interested in working together,
[19:35] Director
    head to the blackboard eraser
    cleaning station in the hall.
[19:39] Director
    You'll be able to reply from there.
[19:42] Suzuki
    I guess you want us to
     team up, Clairaudience?
[19:46] Director
    We don't really have a choice.
[19:49] Suzuki
    It's been twenty years since
    he was sent out on loan
[19:51] Suzuki
    from NIN to the Ministry of Welfare's
    Rear Support Maneuvers Division 2.
[19:54] Suzuki
    I can't even tell whose side he's on anymore.
[19:58] Director
    Your ability to search for the enemy
    on school grounds is going to be limited,
[20:02] Director
    and he knows that.
[20:04] Suzuki
    Tell me one thing.
[20:07] Suzuki
    You're an extremely rare case:
    a nukenin who's been allowed live in public.
[20:13] Suzuki
    You've been here for twenty years. Why?
[20:17] Suzuki
    What's your reason?
[20:19] Director
    Watching out for children as they grow up
    became my reason for living.
[20:25] Director
    Is that a good enough answer?
[20:30] Suzuki
    Honestly, hearing about ancient history
    from you is a waste of time.
[20:33] Suzuki
    Will you be handling the pincer attack?
[20:35] Director
    I'll be backing you up with my ears.
[20:38] Director
    You've got that troublemaker
    for a boss, haven't you?
[20:41] Director
    Bring him in as soon as you can.
[20:44] Suzuki
    So he says.
[20:46] Onikobe
    You heard him.
    What do you say, Chief Ninja Kato?
[20:51] Kato
    I'm already headed there.
[20:54] Kato
    Seems like Clairaudience is just
    going to be listening from on high...
[21:01] Saruta
    Sounds like the clairaudience user
    and the NIN agents have linked up.
[21:05] Saruta
    I expected as much.
[21:13] Kuro
    Hey, you.
[21:16] Noheji
    Kuro-san? Hibi-san?
[21:18] Kuro
    What was your name again?
[21:21] Noheji
    You mean you didn't know?!
[21:23] Kuro
    No.
[21:25] Kuro
    You didn't seem important,
    so I didn't think I'd need to.
[21:27] Noheji
    Damn, man...
[21:29] Noheji
    I'm Noheji!
[21:30] Yankii Duo
    Noheji?
[21:32] Hibi
    That's a weird name...
[21:34] Hibi
    How's Kuro gonna play this?
[21:36] Kuro
    Noheji... 10,895th place...
[21:40] Kuro
    There are approximately 670 in the country,
    most of which are in Tohoku.
[21:46] Kuro
    To think I'd meet one in Nerima...
[21:48] Kuro
    Can I please shake your hand?
[21:49] Noheji
    Uh, sure...
[21:52] Kuro
    You coulda told me sooner!
[21:55] Noheji
    W-Well, I kinda thought you
    were already in the school.
[21:59] Hibi
    Why?
[21:59] Noheji
    Well... uh... I saw someone knocked out.
[22:05] Yankii 1
    That's Kawarada, the guidance counselor.
[22:07] Yankii 1
    He's a second-dan in karate.
[22:11] Eita
    Hey!
[22:14] Eita
    It's me, Eita!
[22:16] Eita
    Save me!
SIGN    Episode 10: "A Maiden's Chest Is a Precious Thing"
[23:55] Kato
    Onikobe is rare enough
    that it doesn't even rank
[23:58] Kato
    among the most common
    Japanese family names.
[24:00] Onikobe
    Which do you think is better,
    a rare name or a common one?
[24:03] Kato
    No clue.
[24:04] Onikobe
    If rare ones are worse,
    I'd be extremely weak.
[24:06] Onikobe
    Maybe I should start going by Sato?
[24:08] Kato
    You really shouldn't.