E11 - Under The Cherry Moon / Adult Education / Solitude
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:07] Kazama
Hey, hey, Morita-kun.
[00:12] Kazama
I'm sayin' hey, man.
[00:16] Kazama
Come on, listen to me, Morita-kun.
[00:20] Kazama
What's going on?
[00:22] Kazama
Morita-kun, hey!
[00:25] Morita
The heck? What is it?
[00:28] Kazama
I wanted to ask...
[00:31] Kazama
does your pee pee fit in the toilet paper roll?
[00:34] Morita
Seriously, what the heck?!
SIGN (As long as you love me)
[02:08] Kazama
Actually, the toilet paper roll has this
exquisite thickness to it, don't ya think?
[02:14] Morita
How should I know?! Go sleep with your wife!
[02:16] Morita
Kazama-kun, seriously,
you're so indecent. I don't like it.
[02:22] Morita
I came here to have
a more serious conversation...
[02:27] Morita
So, now let's start our regular meeting
about how to lose my virginity.
[02:31] Akemi
Your conversation is on the same level,
so just be friends with him already.
[02:35] Kazama
What, Morita-kun, are you still going on
about being a virgin and whatnot?
[02:39] Kazama
Aren't you letting it get to you
a bit too much?
[02:41] Kazama
It's not like being a virgin is
a bad thing or anything, ya know?
[02:45] Morita
Huh?
[02:48] Morita
I'll tell you one thing...
[02:50] Morita
Being a virgin...
[02:53] Morita
is evil!
[02:55] Akemi
So you're calling it bad, huh...
[02:57] Morita
Well? I don't think anyone on your side
would understand, I'm sure.
[03:04] Akemi
You know... I understand
how much you don't like Kazama,
[03:07] Akemi
but do you really need to be
such a dick about it?
[03:11] Morita
Akemi-chan, you don't get it, do you?
[03:14] Morita
I... no, us virgins are the only ones
who truly understand ourselves!
[03:22] Akemi
He's being taken over by the virgin hive mind.
[03:26] Kazama
But you know, Morita-kun...
[03:29] Kazama
You've been a virgin up until now,
[03:31] Kazama
so I don't think you're going to have
any problems going forward either.
[03:34] Morita
Kazama-kun...
[03:37] Morita
If you dare to argue
using a weak statement like that,
[03:41] Morita
don't complain when I rip it to shreds.
[03:44] Akemi
He sounds like a virgin encyclopedia.
[03:47] Morita
A virgin is a person who has never had
a sexual relationship with the opposite sex...
[03:53] Morita
and that in itself is not an evil thing.
[03:56] Morita
But, you know, if you can't have
a sexual connection,
[04:00] Morita
you're considered unable to build
a relationship with the opposite sex.
[04:05] Morita
If you can't build a relationship
with half of humanity,
[04:09] Morita
you're nothing but static in society!
[04:11] Akemi
How can you say something so horrible?!
[04:14] Akemi
You're talking about yourself, aren't you?!
[04:15] Morita
After all, the words I righteously preached
to a virgin are now biting me in the ass.
[04:21] Morita
In that sense, it's a very objective opinion...
[04:28] Morita
If there are no objections, then...
[04:29] Morita
does that mean I win?
[04:31] Akemi
How in the world are you able to declare
victory after what you just said?
[04:34] Kazama
You virgins are no good because
you guys build walls around your heart...
[04:39] Morita
You see, you're treating virgins
like we're villains!
[04:42] Morita
We build that wall because it's necessary!
[04:45] Morita
In order to protect ourselves,
we need a thick wall!
[04:51] Akemi
You know, I'm not going to discriminate
against you because you're a virgin, Morita...
[04:56] Akemi
Because your virginity is actually one of the
least horrible things about you!
[05:00] Akemi
You have other parts
that are far more raw and gross!
[05:04] Akemi
So stop being defensive by using
virginity as your shield!
[05:07] Morita
Aah! Don't take my shield...!
[05:10] Morita
Wait, no, take it! Gently...
[05:17] Akemi
Besides, putting virginity aside,
[05:20] Akemi
there are plenty of married
people who are just as bad.
[05:23] Kazama
Yup. Yup.
[05:24] Akemi
Huh?
[05:25] Kazama
Huh?
[05:27] Morita
That's the harshest reality...
[05:30] Morita
A guy goes to a restaurant with his family
and treats the staff like shit,
[05:35] Morita
but he still has a wife that loves him.
[05:37] Morita
I'm far kinder than he is.
[05:39] Morita
It hurts that I'm all alone!
[05:42] Kazama
What?
[05:43] Kazama
It doesn't necessarily mean the wife
loves her husband, you know?
[05:47] Akemi
No! That sort of talk is too soon for Morita!
[05:51] Morita
Huh?
[05:51] Kazama
Huh?
[05:52] Akemi
It's okay, Morita. Continue.
[05:55] Morita
Once you go out into the real world,
it's not enough to just work hard...
[05:58] Morita
Whether you're married or not
affects your career as well.
[06:02] Morita
Seriously, virgins are taken so lightly
in this world. We're the suckers.
[06:06] Akemi
Yeah... Well, I guess you're still
a virgin if you're only getting sucked.
[06:11] Morita
What are you talking about, Akemi-chan?
[06:13] Akemi
Hm? About getting sucked.
[06:16] Morita
OK, so the same thing.
[06:17] Akemi
So, if you don't want
to get sucked,
[06:21] Akemi
then just take a strong stance and say,
I'm not interested in getting married.
[06:25] Akemi
You know, in a stoic way.
[06:26] Morita
There's a difference between not being
able to do it and not doing it...
[06:29] Morita
Those that say they don't do it,
when really they don't know how to do it,
[06:32] Morita
are the ones who get suckered the most.
[06:34] Akemi
Yeah, I bet. Suck. Suck.
[06:37] Kazama
Hmm, but if you don't want
to be suckered,
[06:42] Kazama
then shouldn't you just be a virgin
who doesn't get suckered?
[06:46] Kazama
It doesn't matter whether
you're a virgin or not...
[06:49] Kazama
Actually, make girls think the fact
that you're a virgin is a positive!
[06:53] Kazama
Be a man with a firm foundation
and broad base, so they can't sucker you!
[06:59] Akemi
You can get sucked when you're firm,
but it won't fit if the base is too big.
[07:03] Kazama
What are you talking about, Akemi-chan?
[07:06] Akemi
About getting sucked, right?
[07:08] Kazama
You're right...
[07:10] Morita
Yeah...
[07:12] Morita
Even if I am a virgin,
if I become a man of all men,
[07:14] Morita
who doesn't get suckered...
[07:17] Morita
Lick. Lick. Lick.
[07:18] Akemi
Stop that tongue motion.
[07:20] Kazama
He's licking away.
[07:22] Kazama
Lick. Lick. Lick.
[07:24] Akemi
You quit it too!
[07:28] Morita
Isn't there something wrong with this?!
[07:30] Akemi
What's wrong is the motion
of that tongue of yours.
[07:33] Kazama
Nothing is wrong, ya?
[07:35] Kazama
All is good if you just become a virgin
who doesn't get suckered, right?
[07:39] Morita
No... It would be good if I could become
a man who doesn't get suckered, but...
[07:44] Morita
But...
[07:48] Morita
Instead of becoming that,
isn't it easier to just lose my virginity?!
[07:52] Akemi
All right. Then do your best
doing it the easier way!
SIGN (An adult's reason)
[08:03] Tatsu-ni
You know, all those movie reboots and remakes...
[08:06] Tatsu-ni
I really wish they'd tone it down.
[08:10] Yamada
Oh, so you're a purist.
[08:12] Tatsu-ni
No, I mean when there's a remake and stuff...
[08:15] Tatsu-ni
We start talking about the year
the original movie came out, you know?
[08:18] Tatsu-ni
Then I start to think,
what was I doing back then?
[08:22] Tatsu-ni
And then I start associating
the two... and I get sad...
[08:25] Yamada
It's starting to make me feel sad too.
SIGN The Year 20XX
[08:28] Tatsu-ni
As soon as I see the old date,
I feel like the past-me is coming to kill me.
[08:34] Past Tatsu-ni
Die, present-me!
[08:39] Yamada
Please reboot that sort of life.
[08:42] Tatsu-ni
Well, I'd like to win against the past me
[08:45] Tatsu-ni
with all the experience
I've gained over the years, but...
[08:52] Tatsu-ni
Body-wise, I can't win against youth!
[08:55] Yamada
Give it your all, gramps!
[08:58] Tatsu-ni
Thankfully, at least I'm winning in money.
[09:02] Present Tatsu-ni
Here... this is all I have...
[09:03] Yamada
It doesn't look like you're winning...
[09:09] Tatsu-ni
I wanted... to be a more proper adult.
[09:13] Akemi
But what is a proper adult anyway?
[09:18] Tatsu-ni
Well, to be married and have children?
[09:22] Akemi
Is that really what it means
to be a proper adult?
[09:25] Tatsu-ni
I wouldn't say it's the only thing,
but it's proper, isn't it?
[09:29] Akemi
What? Even though he's cheating on his wife?
[09:32] Tatsu-ni
Are you accusing all married
people of having affairs?!
[09:36] Akemi
What?
[09:36] Tatsu-ni
What do you mean, what?
[09:38] Akemi
In that sense, Tatsu-ni, you're not married
so there's no way for you to cheat.
[09:42] Akemi
Have confidence in yourself.
[09:44] Yamada
I feel like the way you consoled him
was like an American joke...
[09:47] Tatsu-ni
But isn't that wrong?
[09:49] Tatsu-ni
Proper adults do not cheat!
[09:52] Akemi
What? Really?
[09:55] Tatsu-ni
Well, then can I be forgiven
at least one time...?
[09:58] Yamada
Oh, so you're going to take
advantage of it instead, huh...
[10:01] Tatsu-ni
We shouldn't have to worry excessively
about how to be a proper adult, you know?
[10:07] Tatsu-ni
It seems life doesn't always go
the way you want it to go.
[10:10] Yamada
What exactly is a proper adult, anyway?
[10:15] Tatsu-ni
Well, that'd be someone
who takes care of their family and...
[10:18] Tatsu-ni
has a job they take great pride in and...
[10:21] Tatsu-ni
doesn't cause trouble for others.
Something like that?
[10:24] Akemi
Even if people appear to be proper,
I wouldn't judge a book by its cover.
[10:32] Akemi
Those types of people are usually
the ones who have a dark side...
[10:36] Akemi
Like leaving their dirty socks everywhere
or snoring really loudly...
[10:40] Yamada
That dark side is certainly
from the spouse's point of view.
[10:43] Tatsu-ni
But wouldn't you think proper adults
would be proper in those areas too?
[10:49] Akemi
What? Really?
[10:51] Akemi
Don't you think the only living thing
without flaws like that would be a chimera?
SIGN Status
SIGN Status
Everything:
SIGN Status
Everything:
Good
[10:57] Tatsu-ni
Forget normal, are you saying that
it's not even human?
[11:00] Akemi
Did you even want to be
a proper human to begin with?
[11:05] Tatsu-ni and Yamada
What?
[11:06] Akemi
More so, aren't you thinking
you want to be anything but proper?!
[11:11] Yamada
Akemi-san...
[11:13] Tatsu-ni
If you say that...
[11:15] Akemi
What?! If you had to choose, which is it?
Do you or do you not want to be proper?!
[11:21] Tatsu-ni
If you asked me whether I wanted to be
proper or not then I would say...
[11:26] Tatsu-ni
I don't want to be proper!
[11:29] Akemi
Yay!
[11:32] Yamada
Wha...
[11:33] Tatsu-ni
I wanna go eat ramen
in the middle of the night!
[11:37] Akemi
Yay!
[11:39] Tatsu-ni
I wanna use up all my savings!
[11:43] Akemi
Yay!
[11:45] Tatsu-ni
I wanna put all my savings towards
a guide dog fundraiser or something!
[11:51] Akemi
Ya— What?!
[11:53] Yamada
Umm... But, you'd be in a lot of trouble
if you did that, so people control themselves.
[11:59] Yamada
Doesn't that mean you're being proper,
since you aren't doing that?
[12:03] Tatsu-ni
Yeah, come to think of it...
[12:05] Tatsu-ni
I want to leave my current job
and go open a children's cafeteria,
[12:10] Tatsu-ni
but I can't just go and do that...
[12:12] Akemi
If you want to, just go do it!
[12:14] Tatsu-ni
If I do what I want to do and
don't consider how it'll affect my life,
[12:18] Tatsu-ni
I can't say I'm being a proper adult, you know?
[12:21] Yamada
If you consider what you're trying to do,
that's more than enough.
[12:24] Akemi
Tatsu-ni, all this about fundraising
and a children's cafeteria,
[12:29] Akemi
is that really what you want to do?
[12:31] Tatsu-ni
I have pretty destructive desires...
[12:35] Akemi
You say destructive, but isn't it more like
the self-sacrifice of a saint?
[12:39] Akemi
It may be different from how you see it,
[12:43] Akemi
but to my standards, Tatsu-ni,
you're more than a proper adult.
[12:47] Tatsu-ni
I see... I was being a proper
adult after all, huh...
[12:53] Akemi
But now that you've said it,
something seems off...
[12:56] Tatsu-ni
Huh?
[12:57] Akemi
Now that you're relieved
about getting the answer,
[12:59] Akemi
what usually comes after
self-doubt is arrogance.
[13:03] Akemi
Because never in human history has anyone
said they're proper and actually been proper!
[13:10] Tatsu-ni
Then which one am I?
[13:12] Akemi
Hmm, if you carefully maintain
your current mindset, then...
[13:19] Tatsu-ni
It's hard to keep being a proper adult...
[13:25] Tatsu-ni
But what it comes down to is that
everyone has boundless ideals of
[13:29] Tatsu-ni
how to be a proper adult.
[13:31] Tatsu-ni
Maybe it's almost like someone
saying "I want to be rich," you know?
[13:35] Akemi
In other words, in the end...
[13:39] Akemi and Tatsu-ni
I want to be rich!
[13:44] Yamada
So it really comes down to that, huh...
SIGN Snack Basue
[13:48] Akemi
Snack Basue.
SIGN (I don't have a lot of friends)
[13:58] Akemi
With role-playing games,
[14:00] Akemi
when I stop playing for a while
and then start playing it again,
[14:05] Akemi
I never know where I left off.
[14:07] Basue
I know! Like, why was I visiting this town
or why is this guy in my party or...
[14:15] Akemi
Yep...
[14:19] Akemi
That's... how I feel, right now.
[14:21] Last Boss
Oh, you see, once I spoke to him,
he was a surprisingly nice and friendly guy.
[14:27] Hero
We get along...
[14:28] Akemi
No, no, no, is it really okay
for the Hero and the Last Boss,
[14:30] Akemi
who continuously fought against
each other in the other world,
[14:32] Akemi
to be drinking nicely together
at a run-down snack bar like this?
[14:36] Akemi
And you, Last Boss! Don't you feel
remorse for your fallen comrades?!
[14:43] Basue
Besides, weren't you defeated by the Hero?
[14:48] Last Boss
What? What do you mean, defeated?
[14:52] Hero
Oh, that was the other one...
[14:55] Hero
I'm on New Game Plus right now.
[14:59] Akemi
Is this an ending you can only get
when you do a second playthrough?!
[15:03] Akemi
Are you guys even on good enough
terms to drink and reconcile?
[15:08] Last Boss
Well... How should I put it...
We were both very edgy in the past...
[15:12] Akemi
People who say that are usually
the ones who haven't matured!
[15:16] Akemi
I feel like... When you guys
come to your senses tomorrow,
[15:20] Akemi
you'll be regretting all this...
[15:23] Basue
It's going to be just as awkward as
[15:25] Basue
having a one-night stand with
someone you didn't intend to get with.
[15:29] Akemi
Yes, that! I feel like this is
going to be that type of night!
[15:33] Hero
You mean,
[15:34] Hero
like we both used to hate on
each other all the time.
[15:38] Hero
Like that kind of thing?
[15:39] Akemi
Only if that's how it should have been!
[15:43] Last Boss
But seriously, from whether
we put lemon on our karaage
[15:48] Last Boss
to which idol group member we like
the best, we have so much in common.
[15:52] Akemi
Huh... You're an idol otaku,
even though you're the Last Boss?
[15:55] Last Boss
No, I normally can't say that
because I am the Last Boss.
[16:00] Last Boss
But in a way, that's why I can
talk about it with the Hero.
[16:03] Hero
We're both in a good relationship.
[16:06] Last Boss
Yeah.
[16:07] Akemi
Is this really okay?
[16:08] Last Boss
The Hero and the Last Boss...
[16:11] Last Boss
Even though we're enemies, we're accepting
each other's differences. Isn't that hot?
[16:15] Basue
No, it's lukewarm!
[16:17] Akemi
Actually, aren't you both the type who have
a hard time getting along with others?
[16:22] Akemi
When people like that
suddenly start getting along,
[16:25] Akemi
they tend to split up after
the slightest conflict, you know...
[16:28] Last Boss
But, seriously, we totally get along...
[16:32] Hero
You said it.
[16:35] Akemi
I've seen all types of people
working here, so I know guys...
[16:41] Akemi
The peace that the Hero regained
would have been for nothing in the next game.
[16:46] Last Boss
What? Does that kind of development
even exist for you to mention it?
[16:50] Hero
You said it.
[16:53] Akemi
Now that you mention it, maybe not!
[16:56] Akemi
Maybe only the sequels that ruined
the previous games are the ones
[16:59] Akemi
that left a strong impression on me...
[17:01] Basue
Well, that just shows how much
it pisses off the playerbase.
[17:05] Last Boss
We don't need to worry about such things.
[17:09] Last Boss
With this many common interests,
there's no way we'd fight.
[17:13] Hero
You said it.
[17:15] Akemi
But, isn't having too much in common
going to be troublesome?
[17:20] Akemi
For example, if your taste
in clothing is the same,
[17:22] Akemi
then you guys might end up
wearing the same thing.
[17:25] Last Boss
We don't care if we wear the same clothes.
[17:27] Akemi
You guys are like high school girls.
[17:29] Last Boss
Besides, the Hero seems like
[17:33] Last Boss
he tends to make his party
wear all the same clothes.
[17:38] Hero
You said it.
[17:39] Akemi
Hmm, then how about when you go on a group date
[17:43] Akemi
and you guys fight over the same type
of girl, wouldn't that be a problem?
[17:47] Last Boss
I'll give you half of the world.
[17:50] Hero
All right.
[17:50] Girl
Seriously, that's hilarious!
[17:53] Last Boss
It doesn't bother us.
[17:55] Hero
You said it.
[17:56] Akemi
Seriously, that's gross!
[17:59] Akemi
Common interests... huh...
[18:02] Akemi
When I think about it, all my close friends
don't really have the same interests as me...
[18:08] Akemi
I think when your interests
are slightly different,
[18:11] Akemi
the relationship lasts longer in a way.
[18:13] Akemi
Even when you're critiquing a movie,
[18:15] Akemi
the conversation doesn't last long
if you both have the same opinion.
[18:18] Akemi
When you have slight differences,
[18:19] Akemi
you strike up a conversation
and discover new perspectives, you know?
[18:25] Akemi
I feel like a good relationship with a friend
[18:27] Akemi
is not whether we have
lots of things in common,
[18:30] Akemi
but whether there are fewer things
I can't forgive the other person for...
[18:33] Akemi
No matter how pleasant the person is,
[18:35] Akemi
if you see them pocketing a ton of
sugar packets from the restaurant,
[18:38] Akemi
wouldn't you be so embarrassed that you'd
want to keep your distance from that person?
[18:41] Sugar stick man
Woo hoo! Thanks a bunch!
[18:43] Akemi
Wow, he's the worst.
SIGN You may be charged with theft.
[18:46] Akemi
Right?
[18:47] Last Boss
We'd each take half of the sugar packets.
[18:50] Hero
You said it.
[18:52] Akemi
These two never should have met!
[18:56] Akemi
It's so embarrassing!
[18:58] Akemi
Don't you guys hate people
who are just like you?
[19:00] Last Boss
Not at all.
[19:02] Hero
You said it.
[19:04] Last Boss
But we were the same entity at one point in time.
[19:07] Last Boss
In order to bring harmony to this world,
there has to be chaos and order.
[19:13] Last Boss
It's as if one soul has been
divided between us.
[19:16] Last Boss
That's the kind of strange sensation we feel.
[19:19] Akemi
That plot is a bit too good
for sugar-pocketing bastards.
[19:23] Basue
By the way, why did you become the Last Boss?
[19:27] Last Boss
To put it bluntly,
[19:29] Last Boss
I think it's because I lost faith
in humanity and wanted to destroy it.
[19:32] Basue
It wasn't something to say so bluntly.
[19:36] Last Boss
If I were to give you
an example from your world,
[19:38] Last Boss
it would be like the person who despises
people who post crap on social media
[19:42] Last Boss
realizing that they're the one looking
for naughty selfies of those people.
[19:49] Last Boss
It's that type of despair that makes you
want to just destroy everything.
[19:53] Akemi
Please realize that you're giving us
despair by telling us this story.
[19:57] Last Boss
Come to think of it now,
it was a mistake made from loneliness...
[20:01] Akemi
Yeah, were you able to find
lots of naughty selfies?
[20:05] Last Boss
However, now that I have found
a true friend I get along with,
[20:10] Last Boss
I no longer have a reason to destroy the world.
[20:15] Hero
You said it.
[20:17] Akemi
Oh, I see... so as a result, I guess
the Hero really did save the world.
[20:23] Hero
You said it.
[20:28] Akemi
Hero... Could it be that
[20:32] Akemi
you're just agreeing
with everything that he says?
[20:38] Hero
Yep, you said it.
[20:42] Last Boss
A-Are you...
[20:45] Last Boss
seriously saying that?!
[20:48] Hero
Seriously.
SIGN Seriously
[20:49] Last Boss
He just answered me with a stamp
when I'm being serious!
[20:56] Last Boss
After all that, I am alone.
[20:58] Last Boss
It seems there was no way of changing
our fate to fight one another!
[21:07] Last Boss
Second transformation!
[21:10] Hero
Buff with multiple attack power
enhancement spells!
[21:15] Akemi
If you're going to fight,
go do it in your world!
[21:28] Akemi
Come on! Sing! Sing and make up!
[21:32] Last Boss
Squa... Eni...?
[21:35] Akemi
I didn't say anything about that!
[21:37] Akemi
Come on, Mama, you tell them—
[21:44] Akemi
What a convenient time to glitch.
[21:50] Akemi
Hey!
[21:50] [SONG] Caption
Reserve
SIGN Believe In Your Dream
[21:54] Akemi
Uh... I really don't think that's a good idea.
[21:59] Last Boss
You don't have a problem with it, right?
[22:02] Hero
You said it.
[22:03] Akemi
No, it's not okay...
[22:05] Hero
Then let's sing together.
[22:08] Last Boss
The Hero, the Last Boss,
and even you, young lady!
[22:11] Akemi
Stop trying to get us sued!
[22:14] Akemi
Also, please at least try to make it
seem like it's from our show!
[22:18] Hero
We did it! We finally defeated
the ultimate last boss, but our—
SIGN COMMAND
SIGN T A L K
SIGN S P E L L
SIGN STATUS
SIGN ITEM
SIGN EQUIP
SIGN SEARCH
SIGN Do you want to watch the
next episode of Snack Basue?
[22:23] Akemi
You got the theme right, but stop inserting
a preview that I've heard somewhere else!
SIGN Don't watch
SIGN Watch
SIGN Definitely watch
[22:26] Hero
How many towns are we going to pass
[22:32] Hero
on this road to tomorrow?
[22:41] Last Boss
Nowhere to go. It's as if I'm lost.
[22:47] Last Boss
Standing in the crowd... Right now, you're...
[22:56] Hero
In the past I was too afraid, even to love.
[23:04] Last Boss
I'm looking for my lost tears.
[23:12] Hero
Live on believing in your dream.
[23:18] Hero
That's what you would have screamed out.
[23:27] Hero
Run to tomorrow
[23:30] Hero
while holding your broken wings
[23:36] Hero and Last Boss
close to your heart!
[23:42] Last Boss
Just as I thought,
I feel like it didn't go well!
[23:45] Akemi
Yeah, I bet! I really bet it didn't!
[23:48] Hero
You said it.
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