E3 - The Homeless Gourmet

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:32] Sign
    #TheHomelessGourmet
[01:34] Livia
    Suzuki-dono...
[01:36] Livia
    I guess you've returned
    to where you belong.
[01:41] Livia
    Please take care.
[01:42] Livia
    I will try to survive on my own.
[01:48] Livia
    Now then, I'll need to procure some food.
[01:53] Livia
    If I remember correctly,
    the fish in this river...
[01:56] (Flashback) Suzuki
    In order to fish in the Nagara River,
    you need to buy a fishing permit.
[02:03] Livia
    To think there's perfectly delicious food
    swimming right in front of me
[02:07] Livia
    and all I can do is look at it...
[02:12] Livia
    I'm quite hungry.
[02:15] Livia
    A grasshopper?
[02:18] Livia
    No, no, hold it right there!
[02:21] Livia
    That's a bug.
[02:23] Livia
    How could I, a proud noble
    of the empire, consume a bug?!
[02:27] Livia
    When I didn't resort to such a thing
    even when our country was destroyed?!
[02:41] Livia
    Grasshoppers are good!
[02:43] Livia
    How can they be so delicious?
[02:47] Livia
    Grasshoppers are scrumptious!
[02:49] Livia
    I hate that they're so delectable!
[02:55] Livia
    Good morning, Murata-dono.
[02:57] Murata
    Oh, heya.
[02:58] Sign
    Murata
[02:58] Murata
    Where's Suzuki-san today?
[03:01] Livia
    Suzuki-dono has returned
    to where he belongs.
[03:04] Murata
    Hey, that's great. But are you
    going to be all right by your lonesome?
[03:09] Livia
    Yes, I'm somehow managing on my own.
[03:12] Murata
    I see. We all gather around
    here in the evenings,
[03:16] Murata
    so swing by if you feel like it.
[03:19] Murata
    You can at least kill some time.
[03:21] Livia
    Sure. Thanks for looking out for me.
[03:28] Man
    Seriously?
[03:29] Man
    What? I've never heard of them.
[03:32] Man
    Come on, now.
[03:34] Livia
    I decided to take you up on your invitation.
[03:39] Livia
    If you'd like... please,
    help yourselves to this.
[03:42] Murata
    Wow, grasshopper tempura?
[03:45] Murata
    Did you make that?
[03:46] Livia
    Yes.
[03:47] Kurinohara
    Man, these go great with some sake!
[03:51] Kurinohara
    Let's break out the special stuff!
[03:52] Sign
    Kukkoro
[03:53] Murata
    You sure are generous, Kurinohara-san!
[03:57] Kurinohara
    I won big in pachinko.
[04:00] Livia
    What is this "pachinko"?
[04:03] Kurinohara
    Oh? You interested, lass?
[04:06] Kurinohara
    You see, pachinko is...
[04:08] Kurinohara
    You feel like a king when you win!
[04:14] Livia
    How delicious!
[04:16] Murata
    Look at you.
[04:18] Kurinohara
    Way to go, lass!
[04:21] Sosuke
    I was worried, but it looks
    like she's having fun.
[04:33] Livia
    The rice in this world is truly delicious.
[04:36] Saito
    Hello.
[04:39] Livia
    Hello there.
[04:40] Saito
    Oh, so you can speak Japanese!
[04:43] Saito
    Do you like the food?
[04:45] Livia
    Yes. It's rather tasty.
[04:47] Saito
    That's great!
[04:47] Sign
    Saito
[04:47] Sign
    Aoki
[04:49] Saito
    Say, would you care to chat with us for a bit?
[04:53] Livia
    I certainly wouldn't mind.
[04:56] Saito
    Miss, you seem rather young.
[04:59] Saito
    You must have been through quite an ordeal.
[05:02] Livia
    Huh? Er, yes, you could say that.
[05:06] Saito
    Are you struggling with anything
    in your everyday life?
[05:09] Livia
    Oh, no, not really.
[05:12] Saito
    Listen, just so you know,
     you don't need to hold back with us.
[05:16] Aoki
    That's right. You can tell us everything.
[05:19] Livia
    Hmm... Well, if anything, I guess there's
    the fact that I can't find a job.
[05:24] Livia
    I haven't been able to sign a lease
     or open a bank account.
[05:28] Livia
    And I don't have a family register,
    so I can't really solve all of that.
[05:31] Saito and Aoki
    You're definitely struggling!
[05:34] Livia
    Well, I was planning on figuring
     it all out eventually,
[05:38] Livia
    but taking it easy here for a bit
    isn't so bad.
[05:42] Saito
    T-Taking it easy?
[05:43] Aoki
    You're so positive.
[05:46] Saito
    I know.
[05:47] Saito
    Why don't you come see what our clan is like?
[05:51] Livia
    What is this "clan" you speak of?
[05:53] Saito
    I'm talking about our group,
    the World's Branch Hill Clan.
[05:58] Saito
    In order to create a world where everyone
    can be happy, we feed the needy,
[06:03] Saito
    do volunteer work, and sell
    goods that enrich people's lives.
[06:08] Livia
    Ah, what a wonderful organization.
[06:10] Aoki
    It is!
[06:12] Saito
    My life has changed so much
    since I discovered the clan.
[06:17] Saito
    If you become a clan member,
    you can live in our clan home too.
[06:21] Livia
    Oh! Then would it be all right
    if I came and had a look?
[06:25] Saito and Aoki
    Of course!
[06:28] Sign
    Kaburaya Detective Agency
[06:28] Sign
    RAICHO
[06:29] Sign
    #TheSaviorLadyKnight
[06:29] Young saleswoman
    And just for you today, we're willing to sell
    this statue at a special low price.
[06:35] Sosuke
    Yeah, I'm good. Please leave.
[06:38] Young saleswoman
    Oh, don't say that!
[06:39] Young saleswoman
    With this, your luck will skyrocket
    and you can kiss your meager life goodbye!
[06:44] Sosuke
    Mind your damn business!
[06:45] Young saleswoman
    Ah, at least let us pray for you!
[06:48] Suzuki
    Shut up!
[06:54] Sara
    What were they trying to sell?
[06:56] Sosuke
    Some statue that purges evil spirits
[06:59] Sosuke
    and brings the house good luck, apparently.
[07:02] Sara
    That is precisely what we need most!
[07:05] Sara
    Chase them down at once and purchase it!
[07:07] Sosuke
    Chill. Like anything like that
     is real in this world.
[07:12] Sara
    What?
[07:13] Sosuke
    It's supernatural-related fraud.
[07:15] Sosuke
    They hawk bogus wares.
[07:18] Sara
    My word! And this is acceptable here?
[07:22] Sosuke
    If the person selling the stuff is aware
    that it has absolutely no power or benefit,
[07:28] Sosuke
    it could be considered fraud or extortion.
[07:31] Sosuke
    But those people genuinely seemed
    to believe what they were saying.
[07:34] Sosuke
    They're still young, so maybe they got
    dragged into some fake club in college.
[07:39] Sara
    A fake club?
[07:42] Sosuke
    Religious or political organizations
    sometimes pretend to be normal groups
[07:47] Sosuke
    to lure in students.
[07:49] Sosuke
    If you follow blindly, you end up under
     their mind control and become one of them.
[07:54] Sara
    And how do they accomplish that?
[07:56] Sosuke
    The most famous method is subliminal stimuli.
[08:00] Sosuke
    It affects people's subconscious
[08:02] Sosuke
    with visuals and sounds you don't perceive.
[08:05] Sosuke
    Though it's unclear
    if it's just a bunch of hogwash.
[08:10] Sosuke
    Honestly, the most common way is to
    approach and convince people directly.
[08:13] Sara
    That sounds surprisingly... proper.
[08:17] Sosuke
    No matter how absurd something might be,
[08:19] Sosuke
    if a true believer espouses it
    with all their heart...
[08:23] Sosuke
    you're surprisingly likely to buy in.
[08:27] Sosuke
    But it's not like you're going to learn the
    secret of some unknown world from a stranger.
[08:38] Saito
    This is our home.
[08:41] Saito
    We even have a gymnasium.
[08:43] Saito
    Would you like to play a
    little game of basketball?
[08:45] Livia
    Basketball?
[08:47] Saito
    We'd like to rent the basketball
    court for an hour.
[08:51] Livia
    Saito-dono, what are these?
[08:54] Saito
    They're hill bills,
    the currency the clan uses.
[08:56] Saito
    You earn them by contributing to the clan.
[08:59] Sign
    Bathrooms
[08:59] Livia
    You can't use standard Japanese currency?
[09:02] Saito
    Here at home, you can only use hill bills.
[09:05] Sign
    Gymnasium Sign-Up Form
[09:05] Sign
    Name
[09:05] Saito
    You can convert Japanese yen
    to hill bills, though.
[09:09] Livia
    What about hill bills into yen?
[09:11] Saito
    Oh, there's no need.
[09:13] Saito
    The system is designed to make you want to work for the good of society
[09:16] Saito
    instead of for money!
[09:19] Livia
    I see...
[09:24] Livia
    Hmm...
[09:26] Saito
    Livia-san! Over here!
[09:29] Livia
    Like this?
[09:30] Saito
    Perfect!
[09:36] Livia
    Ooh, that was brilliant, Saito-dono!
[09:40] Saito
    To be honest, I trained to go pro.
[09:43] Livia
    Oh, I see!
[09:45] Saito
    But that dream was shattered
     when I got injured.
[09:48] Livia
    I'm very sorry to hear that.
[09:50] Saito
    Oh, it's fine. Right now, I'm living a
    fulfilling life thanks to the clan.
[09:57] Livia
    Whoops!
[10:02] Livia
    There!
[10:05] Clan member B
    Seriously?
[10:06] Clan member A
    Is she really a beginner?
[10:09] Saito
    Next, let's switch up teams.
[10:11] Saito
    Livia-san, you'll have to deal with me now.
[10:14] Livia
    I am up for the challenge!
[10:20] Livia
    My word!
[10:23] Livia
    You are a worthy opponent.
[10:24] Aoki
    Saito-kun! You're being a bit childish!
[10:27] Saito
    Sorry, I got kind of carried away.
[10:31] Saito
    It's only a game, so let's all have fun.
[10:35] Saito
    Oh, no. You needn't hold back with me.
[10:39] Saito
    Failing all else,
    I will give it my all as well.
[10:43] Saito
    Huh?
[10:46] Saito
    Huh?!
[10:47] Livia
    If I remember correctly, you can take two
    steps while holding the ball, correct?
[10:57] Aoki
    Wait, what?!
[10:59] Clan member B
    Seriously...?
[11:01] Livia
    I-Is it perhaps against the rules to put the
    ball into the hoop while holding it?
[11:06] Clan member B
    H-Holy crap! What the heck was that dunk?!
[11:09] Clan member A
    Didn't she just jump crazy far?
[11:11] Clan member C
    She didn't even have a running start!
    Not even a pro could do that!
[11:15] Livia
    E-Er, well, you see, I happen to, uh...
    practice Chinese martial arts.
[11:21] Member
    Seriously?
[11:22] Saito
    Livia-san!
[11:24] Saito
    I'm sorry for faking you out so many
    times when you're just a beginner.
[11:28] Saito
    And to think I wanted to go pro.
    It's laughable, honestly.
[11:31] Livia
    Why is there any need for modesty?
[11:34] Livia
    I'm quite impressed with your
    fighting spirit, Saito-dono.
[11:37] Saito
    Fighting spirit? This all just
    means I still have a ways to go.
[11:41] Saito
    Oh, that's right! The master
    is giving a lecture tonight.
[11:45] Saito
    You should join us, Livia-san.
[11:47] Livia
    The master?
[11:49] Saito
    The head of our clan, Noa Minakami-sama!
[11:53] Saito
    I'm sure that if you hear Noa-sama speak,
    you'll find your purpose in life!
[11:57] Livia
    Is this person that magnificent?
[12:00] Saito
    But of course!
[12:02] Saito
    Noa-sama was born and raised deep within
    Tibet and gained divine powers!
[12:07] Livia
    Divine powers?
[12:09] Aoki
    She can heal wounds and illnesses,
[12:13] Aoki
    drive away disasters, and bring happiness!
[12:15] Livia
    My word! You mean magic actually
    exists in this world?
[12:18] Aoki and Saito
    Huh?
[12:19] Livia
    Oh, er, nothing.
[12:20] Livia
    Please, allow me to join you!
[12:26] Kenji
    My name is Kenji. I'm a totally
    normal college student.
[12:41] Kenji
    Hey, we work at the same place.
[12:43] Saki
    My name is Saki.
[12:45] Kenji
    Saki-chan! Please go out with me!
[12:48] Saki
    I'll totes go out with you!
[12:50] Kenji
    Saki-chan!
[12:52] Livia
    What a shocking turn of events!
[12:55] Livia
    What's going to happen
    to Kenji and Saki now?
[12:59] Doctor
    Unfortunately, the chances of her regaining
    consciousness are extremely low.
[13:05] Kenji
    Saki-chan...
[13:07] Livia
    I have to wonder, though...
[13:09] Livia
    Why do this mysterious woman and
    these words appear every so often?
[13:16] Livia
    Hrm, it's a bit of an annoyance,
    but I suppose I'll ignore it.
[13:23] Kenji
    There's no meaning to my
    life without Saki-chan...
[13:27] Akira
    Hey, Kenji! You should do
    some volunteer work with me!
[13:31] Kenji
    You're Akira, my friend from college!
[13:34] Kenji
    You do volunteer work?
[13:37] Akira
    Yup!
[13:38] Akira
    Along with my friends and family
    at the World's Branch Hill Clan!
[13:43] Noa
    Kenji-san, I am the master
    of our clan, Noa Minakami.
[13:48] Noa
    I need your strength in
    order to save this world!
[14:01] Kenji
    Wh-What is this?!
[14:04] Noa
    Our world is being devoured
    by an evil force.
[14:09] Kenji
    I had no idea!
[14:11] Livia
    Another surprising development!
[14:13] Livia
    But that voice really is obnoxious...
[14:14] Noa
    Everything will be okay if
    you believe in the clan.
[14:18] Noa
    Give your money to the clan.
[14:24] Monster
    You will stand in the way of evil no longer!
[14:26] Kenji
    Everyone! We need to work together!
[14:29] All
    Yeah!
[14:30] Noa
    Believe in God's love.
    This world is overflowing with hope.
[14:45] Kenji
    Saki-chan!
[14:48] Saki
    Kenji-kun!
[14:49] Noa
    When evil blossoms within people's hearts,
[14:52] Noa
    darkness will fall upon
    this world once again.
[14:56] Noa
    Our battle has only just begun.
[15:00] Kenji
    Noa-sama...
[15:01] Kenji
    As members of the clan,
[15:04] Kenji
    we offer you our bodies, hearts, money...
    everything to continue fighting!
[15:08] Noa
    Thank you, my warriors of light.
[15:19] Livia
    That was quite entertaining!
[15:22] Livia
    Especially at the end! It was great
    to see them defeat the monster.
[15:26] Aoki
    I'm glad to hear it.
    You have real potential, Livia-san.
[15:31] Livia
    By the way, why were there flashes
    of a picture of that woman?
[15:34] Livia
    Not to mention the strange voice that
    kept talking in the latter half...
[15:38] Aoki
    What are you talking about?
[15:40] Livia
    Huh? Oh, er, never mind.
[15:44] Sign
    Keichan
    2 Hill Bills
[15:44] Sign
    Miso Soup
    1 Hill Bill
[15:44] Sign
    Gyoza
    2 Hill Bills
[15:44] Sign
    White Rice
    1 Hill Bill
[15:45] Livia
    Let's dig in!
[15:48] Aoki
    Do you like it?
[15:50] Livia
    Yes! Especially this chicken
    dish. It's delightful!
[15:54] Saito
    That's called keichan.
    It's a local delicacy in Gifu.
[15:55] Sign
    Keichan: Chicken marinated in a miso or soy sauce base and then sauteed with cabbage
     and other ingredients. Seasoning may vary depending on the household or restaurant.
[15:58] Livia
    I see! The miso flavor soaked through
    the chicken is positively delicious.
[16:03] Saito
    What kinds of foods do you
    usually eat, Livia-san?
[16:07] Livia
    Let's see... I'd say my diet
    primarily consists of instant noodles.
[16:12] Livia
    Then there's curry, the rice balls the
    volunteers make for us, and grasshoppers.
[16:15] Saito
    Ah, yes, grasshoppers.
[16:17] Saito
    Grasshoppers?!
[16:18] Aoki
    Grasshoppers as in the bugs?!
[16:21] Livia
    Yes! They're quite delicious
    battered and fried.
[16:31] Livia
    Is she the master you spoke of?
[16:33] Saito
    Yes, that's correct.
[16:35] Livia
    Huh.
[16:40] Noa
    I am truly delighted to see
    all of you on this lovely night.
[16:46] Noa
    Right now, this world is
    overflowing with sadness.
[16:49] Noa
    But there is no need to despair!
[16:52] Noa
    If we combine the powers of the members
    of this clan, no, this family,
[16:57] Livia
    Will I get to witness
    these divine powers soon?
[16:57] Noa
    there is no obstacle we cannot overcome!
[17:01] Noa
    There is a member I'd like
     to reward before all of you tonight.
[17:07] Noa
    Seiji Uchiyama-san.
[17:09] Uchiyama
    Yes.
[17:11] Sign
    Seiji Uchiyama
[17:13] Livia
    Oh?
[17:14] Noa
    Please, step right up.
[17:16] Noa
    Uchiyama-san has offered 5,000
    hill bills to the clan.
[17:21] Clan member A
    How wonderful!
[17:23] Clan member B
    I need to work even harder!
[17:26] Noa
    To thank him for his dedication,
    I would like to give him a blessing.
[17:37] Noa
    O heaven, protect our brother
    from all calamity!
[17:44] Livia
    A spell to shield someone from all calamity?
[17:47] Livia
    Does such a thing actually exist?
[17:58] Uchiyama
    Stay back! Stay back, or I'll kill her!
[18:02] Livia
    Saito-dono, is this also
    part of the entertainment?
[18:05] Saito
    I-I'm very sorry.
    I don't know what's going on.
[18:08] Noa
    Uchiyama-san, why are you doing this?
[18:12] Livia
    Hmm, it is quite impressive that
    she is able to hide her fear
[18:16] Livia
    with that knife up against her.
[18:18] Uchiyama
    Everyone, listen to me!
[18:20] Clan members
    How dare you?!
[18:20] Uchiyama
    This woman is nothing but a con artist!
[18:21] Clan members
    You'll pay!
[18:21] Clan members
    Stop this madness!
[18:22] Uchiyama
    You've all just been brainwashed!
[18:23] Clan members
    Let go of Noa-sama!
[18:24] Uchiyama
    M-My older sister was robbed
     for all she was worth
[18:27] Uchiyama
    by the clan three years ago,
    and then she stole from our family!
[18:31] Uchiyama
    Because of that,
    I had to drop out of high school!
[18:35] Livia
    Is that true?
[18:35] Uchiyama
    An evil cult that exploits its members for
    money with phony spiritual powers...
[18:37] Saito
    N-No! It can't be.
[18:39] Uchiyama
    That's what this clan is!
[18:40] Noa
    Everyone! Please do not blame
    Uchiyama-san for his actions.
[18:44] Noa
    We are all family here!
[18:49] Uchiyama
    Damn it!
[18:51] Uchiyama
    Then show us proof that you're
    not just some con artist!
[18:55] Noa
    You want proof?
[18:57] Uchiyama
    You just blessed me a
    second ago to protect me
[19:01] Uchiyama
    from any kind of disaster, right?
[19:03] Uchiyama
    So let's put those divine powers
    of yours to the test!
[19:14] Livia
    Yeah, he totally just stabbed himself.
[19:19] Uchiyama
    Well, Master?
[19:21] Uchiyama
    I just received your blessing
    a moment ago, didn't I?
[19:25] Uchiyama
    So how do you explain this?
[19:28] Noa
    Th-That blessing was
    to protect you from evil.
[19:34] Noa
    It cannot stop you from harming yourself.
[19:39] Uchiyama
    Yeah, okay.
[19:41] Uchiyama
    I guess I'll buy that.
[19:44] Uchiyama
    All right, Noa-sama. I was wrong.
[19:49] Uchiyama
    So please save me with
    your miraculous powers.
[19:54] Uchiyama
    You can't just sit by...
[19:57] Uchiyama
    while a family member dies
    in front of you, right?
[20:00] Noa
    I-I...
[20:03] Livia
    It appears as though she
    cannot use healing magic.
[20:07] Livia
    Oh, very well.
[20:09] Saito
    Livia-san?
[20:13] Security
    Hey, stay back!
[20:14] Noa
    Wh-Who are you?
[20:16] Livia
    Just some homeless passerby.
[20:33] Uchiyama
    Huh? The pain's gone...?
[20:36] Livia
    Well, that should do it.
[20:39] Livia
    It will leave a scar,
    but you can live with that.
[20:42] Uchiyama
    R-Right...
[20:43] Noa
    Our savior...
[20:46] Livia
    Huh?
[20:46] Noa
    There's no doubt about it!
[20:49] Noa
    You must be our savior sent from the heavens!
[20:52] Livia
    I beg your pardon?
[20:54] Noa
    I have been waiting an eternity
    for this day to arrive.
[20:58] Noa
    Lady Savior, I offer you
    everything our clan has.
[21:01] Noa
    So please, show us the way to salvation!
[21:04] Livia
    Huh?!
[21:05] Livia
    Er, I really can't help you...
[21:12] Aoki
    Lady Savior! Please show us the way!
[21:16] Noa
    I beg of you, Lady Savior!
[21:21] Livia
    I'm terribly sorry, but I must decline.
[21:24] Livia
    After all, there's someone waiting for me.
[21:28] Livia
    I bid you farewell!
[21:29] Noa
    Please wait, Lady Savior!
[21:32] Noa
    Everyone! Please stop her!
[21:36] Saito
    Please don't go, Livia-san! No, Lady Savior!
[21:40] Livia
    Saito-dono, I am no savior.
[21:49] Livia
    I had a lot of fun playing
    basketball with you.
[21:58] Livia
    It's been quite some time since I last
    got to frolic and dine with people my age.
[22:06] Livia
    It was rather fun, but...
[23:37] Sign
    I will come for you, Princess,
    no matter what! -Livia
[23:42] Clan Exec
    Unfortunately, it appears
    we've lost sight of our lady savior.
[23:47] Noa
    I see.
[23:49] Noa
    Livia-sama, I hope to see you again soon.
[23:50] Sign
    Noa Minakami
[23:50] Sign
    Religious
    Leader
[23:54] Sign
    #Next Time
[23:55] Sara
    I would like to go to school.
[23:58] Sosuke
    You didn't have school in your last world?
[24:01] Sara
    It was the norm for the imperial
    family and nobles to hire tutors.
[24:06] Sosuke
    School, huh? I guess I can try something.