E5 - Welcome to My Off-the-Charts Mansion

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:02] Magna
    This...
[00:03] Magna
    is a map of the mansion and its key.
[00:05] Cain
    Thank you!
[00:07] Magna
    His Majesty was meeting with someone,
    but when he heard you were coming...
[00:11] (Flashback) King
    We're playing Reversi!
[00:13] (Flashback) Magna
    Wait, Your Majesty!
[00:15] Magna
    It was quite difficult to talk him out of it.
[00:19] Cain
    Sounds like I'll be able
    to go home early today.
[00:21] Eric
    Hello! Is Cain here?
[00:24] Eric
    Oh, good. I got here in time.
[00:26] Cain
    Duke Eric?
[00:28] Eric
    I wanted a chance to challenge you.
[00:31] Eric
    Would you mind?
[00:32] Cain
    Sure... I'll play.
[00:34] Eric
    Yes!
[00:36] Magna
    I'm next, then!
[00:38] Nobles
    And me next!
[00:39] Nobles
    Me, too!
[00:40] Nobles
    Me, too!
[00:44] Cain
    They say the strong will always be targets,
[00:48] Cain
    and I've been reincarnated as a
    noble who's a little too strong.
[00:52] Cain
    But that's a secret to everyone!
SIGN    The Aristocrat's
    Otherworldly Adventure:
    Serving Gods Who Go Too Far
SIGN    "Welcome to My Off-the-Charts Mansion"
SIGN    "Welcome to My Off-the-Charts Mansion"
[02:30] Cain
    Let's see...
    It should be around here...
[02:37] Cain
    Whoa, it's pretty run-down.
[02:42] Cain
    Don't let anything pop out at me...
[02:46] Cain
    I'm coming in...
[02:51] Cain
    The lights are out.
[02:52] Cain
    I guess the magic stones
    are out of magic, too.
[02:55] Cain
    Light Ball!
[02:58] Cain
    Coming in...
[03:00] Cain
    Oh, boy. There's nothing in the living room.
[03:04] Cain
    I mean, the simplicity is nice, but...
[03:06] Cain
    How many people do they want me
    to cook for?! This isn't a hotel!
[03:11] Cain
    Is this room for parties?
    Such is the nobility...
[03:15] Cain
    Ugh, but it's so filthy.
[03:18] Cain
    I guess I should do a little cleaning.
[03:21] Cain
    All Clean! All Repair!
[03:28] Cain
    Looking good! Let's keep this going!
[03:32] Cain
    There!
[03:37] Cain
    This is my house.
[03:39] Cain
    Even without Mom, Dad, or Grandpa here...
[03:42] Sylvia
    Master Cain!
[03:43] Cain
    It's my house, and everyone's here.
[03:48] Cain
    Sylvia!
[03:49] Cain
    I appreciate you coming here.
[03:51] Sylvia
    Of course! When you asked me to come,
[03:54] Sylvia
    I was so happy, I found myself crying!
[03:57] Sylvia
    From now on, I'll work my hardest with
    the maids here in your exclusive service!
[04:02] Cain
    Thanks.
[04:03] Colan
    Master Cain.
[04:04] Colan
    I am your new butler. My name is Colan.
[04:08] Cain
    Oh, yeah. Sebas has told me about you.
[04:11] Colan
    Sebas has told me a great
    deal about you, as well.
[04:15] Colan
    Such as how you annihilated
    an orc army alone,
[04:17] Colan
    how you blew away an
    entire forest with magic,
[04:19] Colan
    and how you turn all who look
    sideways at you into stone.
[04:22] Cain
    Uh, I never did that!
[04:25] Sylvia
    All right, we'll get started
    cleaning right away.
[04:28] Sylvia
    You two, over there!
[04:29] MaidBC
    Right.
[04:30] Sylvia
    You, over there!
[04:31] MaidA
    Right.
[04:34] MaidBC
    Um...
[04:35] MaidA
    Um, Sylvia...
[04:37] MaidAB
    There's not a speck of dust anywhere.
[04:39] Cain
    Oh... Sorry. I cleaned it all up with magic.
[04:43] Sylvia
    I thought so!
[04:44] Colan
    Huh?! She just accepts everything
    Master Cain does without question?!
[04:50] Sylvia
    In that case, Master Cain...
[04:51] Sylvia
    We'll prepare to receive all of your things!
[04:55] Cain
    I appreciate it, Sylvia.
[04:57] Sylvia
    Of course!
[04:58] Colan
    Master Cain.
[05:00] Colan
    We will take care of things here.
[05:02] Colan
    You should return to Lord Garm's mansion now.
[05:05] Colan
    Today is—
[05:05] Cain
    Oh, I forgot! Today's the day
    my older brothers come home!
[05:13] Djinn
    I never thought you'd be granted a
    peerage and receive a mansion before us.
[05:18] Alec
    Cain really is a little
    brother we can be proud of.
[05:21] Reine
    I can't wait to see Cain's mansion!
[05:24] Djinn
    Reine, I hear it's quite a
    run-down mansion. Are you sure?
[05:28] Alec
    Scary things might pop out.
[05:30] Reine
    I-I'll be fine! Cain will protect me!
[05:35] Reine
    Right?!
[05:36] Cain
    Sister Reine, I don't think anything
    scary is going to pop out.
[05:40] Reine
    But they're saying it's really run-down!
[05:47] Reine
    It's not run-down at all! It's sparkling!
[05:50] Sarah
    It looks like a brand-new house!
[05:53] Garm
    What's this about?
[05:55] Garm
    It was dilapidated and falling apart
    when I came here a few years ago.
[06:00] Garm
    Cain, it was you, wasn't it?
[06:01] Cain
    I just did a little remodeling
    and cleaning with magic.
[06:05] Sarah
    That's my son for you.
[06:10] Reine
    It's beautiful inside, too!
[06:12] Reine
    Wow!
[06:13] Reine
    Wow!
[06:16] Garm
    There are no works of art, though.
[06:19] Cain
    Does it need those?
[06:21] Garm
    Yes. Nobles are fond of artworks
[06:24] Garm
    and decorate their mansions with
     them as a matter of course.
[06:26] Garm
    Paintings, vases, armor... in some cases,
     even mounted or stuffed monsters.
[06:31] Cain
    A stuffed monster would work? In that case...
[06:36] Cain
    I put one up!
[06:39] Garm
    What is it? An enemy attack?
[06:40] Cain
    I'll check first!
[06:45] Cain
    Is everything all right?!
[06:48] MaidABC
    D-Dragon!
[06:51] Cain
    Oh, man! I forgot to explain it to them!
[06:53] Garm
    Cain! What is this?!
[06:56] Cain
    It's a stuffed red dragon.
[06:58] Garm
    I can see that! I'm asking you
    why you have such a thing here!
[07:03] Cain
    Because... I defeated it.
[07:06] Garm
    You defeated it?! When?! Where?!
[07:09] Cain
    A while ago... when I went into that forest.
[07:13] Garm
    A red dragon is a calamity-class monster!
[07:16] Garm
    Even a party of A-rank adventurers
    can barely take it down,
[07:19] Garm
    and not without losing a few!
[07:21] Garm
    And you...
[07:22] Cain
    R-Really?
[07:24] Garm
    Explain it to the maids before
    something like this happens again.
[07:28] Colan
    I-I will explain it to them.
[07:32] Garm
    That said, a stuffed red dragon is
    worth a thousand platinum coins.
[07:37] Garm
    Maybe it's better to have this
    than some random decoration.
[07:40] Cain
    A thousand platinum coins is...
[07:43] Cain
    Ten billion yen?!
[07:46] Garm
    What now?!
[07:50] Cain
    Mother!
[07:51] Sarah
    C-Cain! What is this toilet?!
[07:54] Reine
    It shoots water at you!
[07:58] Sarah/Reine
    What is it?!
[07:59] Cain
    I used magic to make it shoot water out.
[08:03] Sarah
    Amazing!
[08:04] Reine
    Do that to ours, too!
[08:05] Garm
    Really, now. You two are being
    so dramatic over a mere toilet.
[08:09] Sarah
    Why don't you try it yourself, then?
[08:11] Garm
    Hmph.
[08:17] Garm
    What is that thing?!
[08:19] Garm
    Oh, very well. If you want that, Sarah,
    I suppose we can have him do it.
[08:23] Sarah
    I guess he likes it.
[08:25] Reine
    Really likes it.
[08:26] Garm
    Cain, visitors you invite here will
    be pleased with this, as well.
[08:29] Cain
    Visitors I invite?
[08:31] Garm
    Yes. Nobles who come into
    ownership of a mansion
[08:33] Garm
    must host a party to debut it.
    That's the rule.
[08:36] Cain
    What?! Another debut party?!
[08:41] Cain
    What am I supposed to do?
    I didn't know about this!
[08:46] Colan
    Master Cain, I had a feeling
    it would come to this,
[08:48] Colan
    so I made a list of the people you should
    invite and the things you'll need.
[08:53] Cain
    Thank you, Colan!
[08:55] Colan
    You are most welcome.
[08:57] Cain
    Duke Eric, Prime Minister Magna...
[09:01] Cain
    And Marquis Corgino...
[09:03] Cain
    Do I have to invite him?
[09:05] Colan
    Yes. It is common sense, I fear,
    that high-ranking nobles should be invited.
[09:10] Cain
    He and I don't get along so well, though...
[09:12] Cain
    Oh, I don't need to invite the king?
[09:16] Colan
    Only those ranked as a count or higher
    can invite royalty to their mansions.
[09:20] Cain
    Even just sending an invitation
    would be a breach of etiquette?
[09:24] Cain
    And let's see... The things I'll need...
[09:27] Cain
    Alcoholic drinks, food, and gifts.
[09:31] Cain
    What would a noble even
    want to get as a gift?!
[09:36] Sylvia
    Master Cain, instead of
    adhering to formalities,
[09:39] Sylvia
    why don't you give them your
    own brand of hospitality?
[09:43] Cain
    My own brand of hospitality?
[09:46] Sylvia
    Yes, your own unique brand of hospitality.
[09:59] Cain
    All right!
[10:00] Cain
    Hospitality! Hospitality!
[10:05] Sylvia
    How lovely!
[10:06] Sylvia
    It sparkles like a star!
[10:09] Cain
    Everyone here uses porcelain tableware,
    so I thought they might like these as gifts.
[10:14] Sylvia
    I know they'll love it!
[10:16] Cain
    Okay, then, I'll make enough for everyone.
[10:19] Cain
    I'll show my hospitality with glasses!
[10:21] Cain
    There... there... and there!
[10:23] Cain
    Next up, the drinks and food!
[10:27] Head Chef
    I followed the recipe you
    gave me, but I'm not sure...
[10:30] Sylvia
    Master Cain, you called?
[10:32] Cain
    Sylvia, I'd like you to taste
    the food I'll be serving.
[10:38] Sylvia
    Delicious!
[10:40] Cain
    It's called a Hamburg steak.
[10:42] Sylvia
    Hamburg!
[10:44] Sylvia
    The juices from the tender meat burst
    into my mouth the moment I take a bite!
[10:49] Sylvia
    And this brown sauce is a
    perfect match! Master Cain!
[10:53] Sylvia
    It's delicious!
[10:55] Sylvia
    And how about this drink?
[10:58] Sylvia
    It's so fizzy and bubbly,
    and it goes perfectly with the meat!
[11:03] Sylvia
    What is this beverage?!
[11:04] Cain
    Sparkling wine.
[11:06] Cain
    I used magic to make regular wine fizzy.
[11:08] Cain
    I can't drink alcohol yet,
[11:10] Cain
    so you'll have to tell me honestly if the
    bubbles are too strong or anything.
[11:16] Sylvia
    I don't know.
[11:17] Cain
    Huh?
[11:18] Sylvia
    I'll need another glass to be sure.
[11:23] Head Chef
    She's quite the drinker...
[11:25] Cain
    She sure is. Maybe the bubbles
    are too strong, in a way.
[11:29] Colan
    Master Cain, a messenger has
    come from the royal palace.
[11:32] Cain
    Huh?
[11:36] King
    Glance.
[11:37] Cain
    It seems like the whole gang's here...
[11:40] Cain
    And they don't look happy.
[11:44] King
    Cain, I have not received an invitation
    to your mansion's debut party.
[11:50] King
    Why is this?
[11:52] King
    Why?! You sent invitations to Eric and Magna!
[11:56] King
    Why didn't I get one?!
[11:58] King
    I'm the one who gave you that mansion!
[12:02] Eric
    Now, now, Your Majesty.
[12:03] Eric
    Only high-ranking nobles can
    invite you to their mansions.
[12:07] King
    And more importantly, I'm your father!
[12:10] King
    You would neglect your future father?!
[12:13] King
    Eric was shoving his invitation
    in my face and bragging about it!
[12:17] King
    Can you comprehend how vexing that is?!
[12:20] Cain
    The truth is...
[12:22] Cain
    I had planned to give you your invitation
    in person the next time we met.
[12:26] Cain
    But I realize how busy you are,
[12:30] Cain
    so I was delayed while waiting
    for the right opportunity.
[12:33] Cain
    I sincerely apologize.
[12:35] King
    I thought that must be it!
[12:37] King
    See, Eric?! Didn't I tell you?!
[12:40] King
    He had one for me, too!
[12:42] Cain
    I'm glad I followed Colan's advice
    and brought an invitation!
[12:47] King
    Cain, I will bring Telestia, as well.
[12:50] King
    I look forward to the party.
[12:52] Eric
    And I will bring Silk, as well.
[12:55] MaidABC
    What?!
[12:56] MaidABC
    The king will be attending?!
[12:59] MaidA
    But why?
[13:00] Cain
    I guess I never told you.
[13:02] Cain
    The third princess, Telestia,
[13:05] Cain
    is actually my fiancée.
[13:06] MaidABC
    What?! The princess is your fiancée?!
[13:10] Sylvia
    All right, girls, calm down.
[13:14] Sylvia
    No matter who attends, we maids need only
    provide the best possible hospitality.
[13:19] Sylvia
    Let's welcome him with all we have.
[13:21] Sylvia
    Right, Master Cain?
[13:23] Cain
    Right.
[13:25] Cain
    I'm counting on you all to
    make him feel welcome.
[13:27] MaidABC
    Yes, Master Cain! We'll do our best!
[13:33] Voice
    Announcing the arrival of Baron Gam.
[13:36] Voice
    Announcing the arrival of Viscount Maki.
[13:40] Eric
    Cain!
[13:42] Cain
    Duke Eric.
[13:44] Cain
    Miss Silk.
[13:46] Eric
    Thank you for inviting us.
[13:48] Cain
    I'll show you inside.
[13:51] Eric
    A r-red dragon!
[13:54] Eric
    I've heard stories about them,
     but I never thought I'd see one up close.
[13:59] Eric
    Surprising us from the very
    first hall we enter, I see.
[14:02] Silk
    Wow! I'll be living here one day!
[14:07] Eric
    You're getting a bit ahead of yourself.
[14:09] Cain
    Right...
[14:10] Colan
    Master Cain.
[14:11] Colan
    It is nearly time.
    Please offer your greetings.
[14:15] Cain
    Right.
[14:17] Cain
    Thank you all for taking the time out
    of your busy schedules to attend today.
[14:22] Cain
    While it is a meager offering,
    I've arranged food and drinks.
[14:28] Cain
    I hope you all enjoy them.
[14:30] Cain
    Now, if you'll all join me...
[14:33] Cain
    Cheers!
[14:34] All
    Cheers!
[14:38] Garm
    What is this beverage?!
[14:40] Garm
    It's full of bubbles that pop in my mouth!
[14:42] Garm
    I love it!
[14:44] Sarah/Eric
    And it's so ice-cold and yummy!
[14:47] Cain
    I used water magic to chill it.
[14:49] Eric
    And this glass!
[14:51] Eric
    It shines so brilliantly!
[14:53] Sarah/Eric
    Just like a treasure chest!
[14:56] Cain
    The glasses are my gifts for all attendees.
[14:58] Cain
    Please take them home with you.
[15:00] Eric
    Oh! I do appreciate that!
[15:03] Eric
    The food is fantastic, as well.
[15:05] Eric
    Look over there.
[15:07] Eric
    Only ten years old, and you've grasped
    the ladies by their stomachs.
[15:11] Eric
    Still a philanderer, aren't you, Cain?
[15:17] Noble
    It's the king!
[15:18] Noble
    The king is here!
[15:21] King
    I apologize for interrupting the
    pleasant chats you were having.
[15:24] King
    Pay us no mind. Continue to enjoy yourselves.
[15:28] King
    What is this?
[15:29] King
    Between the transparency and the pattern
    on it, I've never seen such beauty!
[15:36] King
    It's so fizzy and bubbly!
[15:39] King
    The bubbles are popping in my mouth!
[15:41] King
    And what is this?
[15:43] Cain
    It's a dish called Hamburg steak.
[15:45] King
    Hmm. Hamburg steak, you say?
[15:47] Cain
    It's made with meat that's been
    processed to make it tender.
[15:52] King
    Hamburg!
[15:54] King
    The rich juices that pour out
    from every crack in the meat!
[15:57] King
    And what is this mysterious
    substance oozing out?!
[15:59] King
    This is cheese?!
[16:01] King
    The meat juices and the
    mellow aroma of the cheese
[16:03] King
    play an exquisite harmony in my mouth!
[16:09] King
    Outstanding!
[16:11] King
    Teles, what do you think?
[16:13] Teles
    Yes, it is quite delicious!
[16:15] Queen
    Baron Cain! Baron Cain!
[16:17] Queen
    What in the world is that in there?!
    Water spouted up from the toilet!
[16:21] Cain
    My Queen, that is...
[16:23] Queen
    It's revolutionary! You must put
    one in the palace right away!
[16:27] King
    What's this about the toilet?
[16:28] Queen
    Go and see for yourself!
[16:30] Queen
    You will be most surprised!
[16:40] King
    Unforgivable! Simply unforgivable!
[16:42] King
    Why didn't you tell me sooner
    that you had such a fine thing?!
[16:45] King
    Cain! Put one of those in the
    palace at once! Tomorrow!
[16:49] Queen
    Please!
[16:50] Cain
    S-Sure...
[16:51] King
    Cain!
[16:53] King
    Your consideration shows not only in
    the food, but in everything thereafter!
[16:57] King
    I am deeply moved by your spirit!
[17:00] King
    This is the ultimate hospitality!
[17:02] Noble
    Wow! The king gave him
    the ultimate compliment!
[17:05] Cain
    Your Majesty...
[17:11] Cain
    I'm glad I did all this.
[17:15] Colan
    Excuse me, Master Cain. May I have a moment?
[17:21] Cain
    Marquis Corgino...
[17:23] Corgino
    Well, well, Baron Cain!
    Thank you for the invitation!
[17:27] Corgino
    What a small mansion it is, though.
    More like a dog house!
[17:31] Colan
    Marquis Corgino—
[17:35] Colan
    But we must warn him about
    the stuffed monster.
[17:39] Corgino
    It's a dra-dra-dra-dragon!
[17:43] Cain
    Please forgive me. It's a stuffed red dragon.
[17:47] Corgino
    T-Tell me that sooner, you fool!
[17:50] Corgino
    Your taste is as poor as
    I expected, Baron. And...
[17:54] Corgino
    What a deplorable lineup of attendees!
[17:56] Noble
    How vile.
[17:57] Noble
    What an attitude for someone
    who showed up after the king.
[18:00] Noble
    Just look at him.
[18:01] Corgino
    Ugh, it's so noisy in here.
[18:04] Sylvia
    Here you are.
[18:05] Sylvia
    It's the drink we used for the toast.
[18:08] Corgino
    Hmph! I'm sure a drink offered by
    the baron is of no consequence,
[18:12] Corgino
    but I'll sample it.
[18:17] Cain
    Do you like it?
[18:19] Corgino
    No.
[18:20] Cain
    This is Hamburg steak.
[18:22] Corgino
    Ugh, such a ridiculous-looking dish...
[18:26] Corgino
    Yum!
[18:27] Corgino
    I mean, disgusting!
[18:31] Corgino
    Yum! I mean, disgusting!
[18:33] Corgino
    Hey! Someone bring me some sauce!
[18:36] Corgino
    Give me that!
[18:41] Cain
    This rotten...
[18:43] Colan
    Master Cain, he is a marquis.
    You mustn't make a fuss.
[18:47] Colan
    Just stand firm.
[18:48] Cain
    Yeah, but...
[18:51] Cain
    It's fine as long as
     I don't make a fuss, right?
[18:55] Cain
    Marquis Corgino, it is a meager offering,
[18:59] Cain
    but please take this as a token
    of my thanks for your attendance.
[19:02] Corgino
    Oh, yes, it's a meager offering, all right!
[19:04] Corgino
    But I like it!
[19:06] Corgino
    Give all of the glasses and drink to me!
[19:09] Corgino
    And have the recipe for this dish
    ready for me by the time I leave!
[19:14] Cain
    I can't do that.
[19:15] Corgino
    What was that, you lowly baron?!
[19:18] Cain
    I'll be giving these glasses to
    everyone in attendance today.
[19:23] Corgino
    It would look better for you to have a
    marquis using these than any of that rabble!
[19:28] Corgino
    Give me fifty! No, a hundred!
[19:31] Cain
    I'm very sorry.
[19:32] Cain
    I cannot grant such a request,
    even if it comes from you.
[19:37] Cain
    Oh, but if you'd accept the
    kingdom's biggest instead...
[19:41] Corgino
    The kingdom's biggest what?! A jewel?!
[19:43] Cain
    Oh, it's even more amazing than a jewel.
[19:47] Corgino
    What?! Even more amazing?! Give it to me!
[19:51] Cain
    Two more meters... One more meter...
[19:53] Cain
    Of course. Please accept
    this kingdom's biggest...
[20:01] Corgino
    Your Majesty!
[20:02] Corgino
    Wh-What are you doing in the home
    of such a low-ranking noble?!
[20:07] King
    Well, he's the one who saved
    my daughter, Telestia.
[20:11] King
    Of course I'd come.
[20:13] Eric
    What about you, Marquis?
    When did you get here?
[20:16] Eric
    Surely you didn't arrive later than
    the king and the rest of us, did you?
[20:21] Corgino
    N-No! Of course not!
[20:24] King
    That aside, Corgino,
[20:26] King
    if the tyrannical behavior I just
    witnessed is your typical attitude,
[20:31] King
    then I will have to rethink
    certain future events.
[20:34] Corgino
    I-It was no such thing!
[20:36] Corgino
    I was just so impressed by the glasses and
    the meal that I asked how they were made!
[20:42] King
    That is all well and good, but, Corgino...
[20:45] King
    A marquis must conduct himself in a way
    that sets an example for other nobles!
[20:50] King
    Understand?
[20:53] Corgino
    I-I understand!
[20:58] Silk
    I saw that.
[20:59] Silk
    You set that up, didn't you?
[21:03] Silk
    You're such a little trickster, Cain.
[21:07] Eric
    Does that mean you used us, then?
[21:11] Cain
    Yep! I thought I might as well use the
    biggest weight in the kingdom to—
[21:17] King
    Hello. I'm the biggest
    weight in this kingdom.
[21:20] Cain
    Oh, crap! I'm in trouble again!
[21:24] Cain
    I'm sorry!
[21:25] King
    Feel this weight!
[21:29] Cain
    An ordinary child would
    be crying right now...
[21:33] Eric
    Oh, my stomach hurts!
[23:08] King
    I can't believe my future son used me!
[23:10] King
    I bet you intend to keep using me
    like that from now on, don't you?!
[23:14] Cain
    No, not at all!
[23:15] Cain
    But I couldn't defy
    Marquis Corgino to his face,
[23:19] Cain
    so it was no more than a last resort...
[23:22] King
    I knew it! You enjoyed every moment of it!
[23:25] Cain
    I was just kidding! I'm sorry! Forgive me!
[23:27] King
    Just who do you think I am, anyway?!
[23:30] Cain
    He continued to lecture me for two hours.
[23:30] King
    I am the king of this nation, and your father!
SIGN    Preview
[23:35] King
    Next time, "A Date with the
    Strongest Captain of the Knights."
SIGN    "A Date with the Strongest Captain of the Knights"
[23:37] King
    Garm, your son is a serious playboy!