E3 - My Ex Has a Confession to Make 'You Didn't Do Anything Weird, Did You?

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:08] Yume
    This exceptionally introverted girl
    is me from six months ago.
[00:16] Yume
    Back then, every time he gave me something,
[00:20] Yume
    I would store it in a small box.
[00:24] Yume
    I repeated a cult-like ritual
    of smiling creepily
[00:28] Yume
    while worshiping it like some sacred object.
[00:34] Yume
    Truly alarming behavior.
[00:36] Yume
    Should you look up "crazy woman"
    in the dictionary,
[00:39] Yume
    you'd likely find a picture
    of me from back then.
SIGN    My Stepmom's
    Daughter Is
    My Ex
SIGN    My Ex Has a Confession to Make
SIGN    "You Didn't Do Anything Weird, Did You?"
[02:29] Yume
    Wait! Hold on a sec!
[02:31] Yume
    How on earth did I end up
    with his underwear?!
[02:34] Yume
    And what was I doing with them?!
[02:38] Yume
    Just kill me!
[02:39] Yume
    It's like I've regressed
    into some desperate loser!
[02:42] Yume
    I thought I'd left the
    introverted life behind me!
[02:47] Yume
    This is all his fault for wearing
    underwear in the first place!
[02:50] Yume
    Because of him, my old self
    is rearing her ugly head again!
[02:54] Yume
    If he were to find out about this...
[02:57] Yume
    It would be a major violation of our rules!
[03:00] Yume
    I'd be pronounced guilty
    with no hope of appeal,
[03:02] Yume
    nor any hope of a deferred sentence!
[03:03] Yume
    I'd have to submit to being his little sister.
[03:07] Yume
    And then... And then...
[03:15] Mizuto
    'Sup, little sister, who made off with her
    stepbrother's underwear like a pervert.
[03:19] Yume
    I-I'm not a perv...
[03:22] Mizuto
    Oh?
[03:23] Mizuto
    You mean to say that stealing my underwear
     and keeping my things in a little box
[03:28] Mizuto
    isn't the behavior of a pervert?
[03:35] Yume
    Irido-kun...
[03:38] Mizuto
    Don't you mean...
[03:40] Mizuto
    "Onii-chan," my perverted little sister?!
[03:44] Yume
    Onii-chan!
[03:49] Yume
    I-If I don't do something...
[03:51] Yume
    I think I'm gonna go insane!
[03:57] Yume
    Accursed thing!
    I must return them before it's too late!
[04:07] Yume
    The only catch is that
    he still seems to be awake.
SIGN    April
[04:11] Yume
    Come on!
[04:12] Yume
    I thought I'd have the perfect opportunity
    at this hour with everyone fast asleep.
[04:18] Yume
    What could possibly have
    him pacing about like that?
[04:22] Yume
    I'll just have to wait
    until he's gone to bed...
SIGN    April
[04:37] Yume
    No signs of movement.
[04:40] Yume
    He must have finally gone to bed.
[04:43] Yume
    Now's my chance!
[05:12] Mizuto & Yume
    Huh?
[05:15] Mizuto & Yume
    Ready, set, go!
[05:17] Mizuto & Yume
    Rock, paper, scissors!
[05:22] Mizuto
    You were the one who suggested
    this family meeting, right?
[05:25] Mizuto
    Come on. We said whoever
    lost had to go first.
[05:29] Mizuto
    Get on with it.
[05:31] Yume
    It wasn't my fault.
[05:33] Yume
    I just reverted to my old,
    introverted ways is all.
[05:37] Yume
    Had I been in my right mind, I wouldn't have
     given your underwear a second thought.
[05:41] Mizuto
    Your old, introverted self, huh?
[05:44] Mizuto
    Sounds like you're saying this
[05:46] ---
    would've been normal for you
    back in middle school.
[05:49] Mizuto
    You mind explaining yourself?
[05:53] Yume
    Do I really have to explain that too?
[05:56] Mizuto
    No withholding information
     at times like this.
[05:59] Mizuto
    We must wholly and truthfully reveal
    our dirty secrets to one another.
[06:03] Yume
    Well, this was back when we were dating,
[06:08] Yume
    but I used to keep
    the things you'd give me.
[06:11] Yume
    I kept them in a little box.
[06:22] Yume
    Hold on, are you blushing?
[06:25] Mizuto
    Why would I be?
[06:26] Yume
    Did that make you happy?
[06:29] Yume
    The fact that I used to keep
    the things you gave me?
[06:32] Mizuto
    Why on earth would that make me happy?
[06:34] Mizuto
    It's sickening. Absolutely revolting.
[06:37] Mizuto
    In any event, look who's finally
    decided to come clean.
[06:41] Mizuto
    Though I'm sure you could've
    kept it to yourself
[06:44] Mizuto
    and cast the blame solely on me.
[06:51] Mizuto
    Did you just think,
     "Why didn't I think of that?"
[06:54] Yume
    N-No, I didn't.
[06:56] Yume
    It's just... Ah, yes! I wanted to play fair.
[07:01] Mizuto
    I think somewhere deep down,
    you wanted me to find out.
[07:04] Mizuto
    Why not take the chance to confess?
[07:06] Mizuto
    You actually wanted me to see
    how perverted you are, right?
[07:09] Yume
    Yeah, yeah. It's your turn now, isn't it?!
[07:13] Mizuto
    Yes, well...
[07:16] Mizuto
    How should I say this?
[07:18] Mizuto
    Given my situation, I... don't think
    you'd believe me even if I told you.
[07:24] Mizuto
    It was an accident.
[07:26] Mizuto
    Your bra fell on the floor,
    so I picked it up,
[07:28] Mizuto
    but then Dad walked in and...
[07:34] (Flashback) Mizuto
    What's that?
[07:41] (Flashback) Mineaki
    Oh, done with your bath already?
[07:43] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Y-Yup!
[07:45] Mizuto
    So, as you can see, I simply missed
    my chance to put it back.
[07:49] Yume
    Huh?! You scoundrel!
[07:51] Yume
    There's no way something
    that convenient happened!
[07:55] Yume
    You just wanted my bra,
    so you stole it, didn't you?
[07:58] Mizuto
    I didn't steal it!
[07:59] Mizuto
    And besides,
[08:00] Mizuto
    you took my boxers back
    to your room too, did you not?
[08:03] Yume
    But that was...
[08:05] Yume
    a-an accident.
[08:06] Yume
    They fell on the floor, so I picked them up,
[08:09] Yume
    but then Mom walked in and...
[08:14] (Flashback) Yume
    What's that?
[08:22] (Flashback) Yuni
    Oh, all done with your bath?
[08:24] (Flashback) Yume
    Y-Yeah!
[08:26] Yume
    So you could say I missed my chance.
[08:30] Mizuto
    You just said the exact same thing I did.
[08:32] Yume
    I-In any case...
[08:34] Yume
    After you took my bra to your room,
[08:36] ---
    you didn't d-do anything weird, did you?
[08:39] Mizuto
    What do you mean by weird?
[08:41] Yume
    W-Well, you know...
[08:43] Mizuto
    Don't worry.
[08:45] Mizuto
    All I did was move it to my room
     and then here, to the living room.
[08:49] Mizuto
    I swear to you, I didn't do anything else.
[08:52] Yume
    Really?
[08:54] Mizuto
    Really.
[08:55] Yume
    Not even poke the cups?
[08:59] Mizuto
    Absolutely not.
[09:01] Yume
    You had to think about that!
[09:02] Mizuto
    I said I didn't do it!
[09:03] Mizuto
    I trust you didn't do anything weird
    with my boxers either, then?
[09:09] Mizuto
    Like smell them, for instance.
[09:12] Yume
    I did not.
[09:14] Mizuto
    You had to think about that.
[09:16] Mizuto
    Forget it. We're in agreement, right?
[09:18] Mizuto
    We mustn't speak of this incident ever again.
[09:22] Yume
    Yes, that would be for the best.
[09:27] Yume
    Now then, Mizuto-kun...
[09:29] Mizuto
    What is it, Yume-san?
[09:31] Yume
    We're both out of bounds, aren't we?
[09:33] Mizuto
    You mean our little game? I'm aware.
[09:36] Mizuto
    Normal siblings wouldn't abscond
    with each other's underwear.
[09:39] Yume
    Then it's time we made a deal.
[09:42] Yume
    So, what shall I have you do for me,
     little brother of mine?
[09:46] Mizuto
    Don't think for a second I'll concede this,
     my dear little sister.
[09:57] Mizuto
    How about this for a deal?
[09:59] Mizuto
    As long as it doesn't infringe
    upon any social norms,
[10:02] Mizuto
    we each get a demand.
[10:04] Yume
    A demand?
[10:06] Yume
    Very well. I can agree to that.
[10:08] Mizuto
    Okay. It's a deal.
[10:11] Mizuto
    Our parents will be up soon.
[10:13] Mizuto
    Let's try to play our roles
    as loving siblings again today.
[10:18] Mizuto
    But outside of this house,
    we can do whatever we please.
SIGN    Irido
[10:22] Mizuto
    So long as neither of us causes trouble.
SIGN    My Stepmom's Daughter Is My Ex
[10:29] Girl NPC 1
    All right, see you tomorrow!
[10:31] Boy NPC 1
    Take care!
[10:34] Yume
    What happened this morning...
[10:36] Yume
    In the end, we were both being idiots.
[10:44] Yume
    What the hell?! Who's that girl?!
[10:47] Yume
    Huh?! He's on a date?!
[10:50] (Flashback) Mizuto
    We can do whatever we please.
[10:52] (Flashback) Mizuto
    So long as neither of us causes trouble.
[10:55] Yume
    Is this what he meant by that?!
[10:58] Yume
    And she has black hair and
    black-framed glasses to boot!
[11:01] Yume
    She's basically the old me!
[11:05] Girl NPC 2
    Morning!
[11:07] Girl NPC 3
    Morning.
[11:08] Akatsuki
    Hmm, a girl with black hair
    and black-framed glasses?
SIGN    School Motto
SIGN    Work Diligently. Think Critically.
    Strive for Excellence. Take Initiative.
[11:14] Akatsuki
    Well, this is a prep school, you know?
[11:16] Akatsuki
    Lots of girls fit that description.
[11:19] Yume
    Yes... I suppose you're right.
[11:22] Yume
    But wow! An after-school date
     at Wicky-D's, huh?
[11:25] Yume
    Irido-kun's not doing too bad for himself.
[11:28] Yume
    I guess he can be pretty charming
     despite his quiet demeanor,
[11:32] Yume
    and if you really look at him,
    he's actually kinda cute.
[11:34] Yume
    He could probably sweep a shy girl
     off her feet, no problem.
[11:38] Yume
    That jerk!
[11:39] Yume
    He's just preying on that poor,
    innocent girl, isn't he?
SIGN    Irido
[11:45] Yume
    What?!
[11:48] Yume
    Wh-What are these loafers doing here?!
[11:51] Yume
    That jerk! He's already bringing her home?!
[11:53] Yume
    It hasn't even been a month
    since we started school!
[11:57] Yume
    It took us six months of dating
[11:59] Yume
    before he brought me home with him.
SIGN    SLO-MO VIDEO PHOTO SQUARE PANORAMA
[12:20] Mizuto
    Hello?
[12:21] Yume
    Where are you right now?
[12:22] Mizuto
    Huh? At home. Where else?
[12:24] Yume
    I just remembered I was
    supposed to pick something up.
[12:27] Yume
    My hands are full at the moment,
    so can I ask you to go get it for me?
[12:30] Mizuto
    Ugh...
[12:32] Yume
    Please.
[12:33] Mizuto
    "Please"?
[12:36] Mizuto
    It's strange to hear you ask so nicely.
[12:39] Yume
    Oh, shut up.
[12:41] Yume
    Could you stop poking fun at me already?
[12:43] Mizuto
    I'll have you run an errand for me
    in return, so that'll make us even, okay?
[12:47] Mizuto
    So, what do you need me to pick up?
[12:50] Yume
    Let's see...
[12:51] Mizuto
    Let's see?
[12:51] Yume
    Uh, wait!
[12:52] Yume
    I said lettuce! Lettuce and cheese!
[12:55] Mizuto
    Lettuce and cheese? All right...
[13:04] Yume
    Sounds like he left.
[13:06] Yume
    Now that girl should be alone in his room.
[13:10] Yume
    I must warn her not to let a boy
    lure her into his home so easily!
[13:26] Yume
    Why are you here?
[13:28] Mizuto
    I could ask you the same thing.
[13:29] Yume
    I thought you left just now...
[13:32] Mizuto
    Huh?
[13:37] Yume
    They're gone!
[13:38] Yume
    The loafers are gone!
[13:41] Mizuto
    What's with you all of a sudden?
[13:43] Mizuto
    You're holding your loafers right now.
[13:45] Yume
    These are mine!
[13:47] Yume
    But forget that!
[13:48] Yume
    You just sent away the girl you
     brought home, didn't you?!
[13:51] Mizuto
    Huh? What girl?
[13:54] Mizuto
    I don't know what you're talking about.
[13:57] Mizuto
    I've been alone all this—
[13:58] Yume
    Don't play dumb with me!
[13:59] Yume
    I saw a pair of girl's school shoes
    by the door, plain as day.
[14:03] Yume
    Here, I have proof.
[14:10] Mizuto
    You just took that a minute ago, right?
[14:12] Yume
    That's right.
[14:14] Mizuto
    Why don't you go check your room?
[14:17] Yume
    Huh?
[14:17] Mizuto
    Just go check it, would you?
[14:20] Yume
    Wh-What's gotten into you all of a sudden?
[14:29] Yume
    There wasn't anything there.
[14:32] Mizuto
    Are you sure?
[14:33] Mizuto
    Nothing in your room whatsoever
    had been tidied up or was out of place?
[14:38] Yume
    Huh?
[14:39] Yume
    You can't possibly be
     suggesting paranormal activity.
[14:43] Yume
    Out with it. Explain yourself already.
[14:46] Yume
    Those shoes belonged to a girl
    you brought home, didn't they?
[14:50] Mizuto
    Huh?
[14:51] Mizuto
    Oh. Yeah, yeah. That's right.
[14:54] Mizuto
    You caught me. I'm busted.
[14:56] Yume
    What?! That was quick... Wait a minute!
[14:59] Mizuto
    What do you want? I'm exhausted.
[15:02] Mizuto
    Don't you get it?
[15:03] Yume
    E-Exhausted?
[15:08] Mizuto
    Let's do this before my
    stepsister gets home.
[15:18] Yume
    Wh-Wh... What were you
    doing in there with her?!
[15:21] Mizuto
    Huh?
[15:23] Mizuto
    Why do I have to explain
    myself to you, Yume-san?
[15:27] Mizuto
    Anyways...
[15:28] Mizuto
    I'll be more careful next time.
     Just forget about this, okay?
[15:32] Mizuto
    Later.
[15:50] Yume
    Seriously, did he forget where
    his room is or something?
[16:00] Yume
    Am I misunderstanding something here?
[16:06] Yume
    Am I just... making a big deal
    out of nothing like I always do?
[16:30] Mizuto
    There's no question.
[16:32] Mizuto
    This is all her doing.
[16:44] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Irido-kun, would you go out with me
     so we can get married one day?
SIGN    Metamorphosis
    Franz Kafka
[16:50] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Uh... Sorry.
[16:53] (Flashback) Mizuto
    I don't believe we've met.
[17:02] (Flashback) ---
    Philosophy
    
    • Philosophical Theory
    • Eastern Ideology
    • Western Ideology
    • Psychology
[17:04] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Man! You really can't tell, huh?
[17:06] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Huh?
[17:07] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Hmm? You still can't tell?
[17:09] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    All right, gimme one sec.
[17:16] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Ta-da!
[17:18] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Minami-san?!
[17:19] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Bingo!
[17:20] (Flashback) Mizuto
    I had no idea...
[17:20] (Flashback) ---
    Philosophy
    
    • Philosophical Theory
    • Eastern Ideology
    • Western Ideology
    • Psychology
[17:23] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Uh, wait a minute, Minami-san.
[17:26] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Does this mean you like me?
[17:28] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Well, I wouldn't say I hate you.
[17:31] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Huh? You don't hate me...
    So you're willing to marry me?
[17:36] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Exactly!
[17:37] (Flashback) Mizuto
    Why on earth do you want
    to marry me, Minami-san?
[17:41] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Well, if you must know,
[17:42] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    if you and I get married,
     that'd make Yume-chan my sister!
[17:46] (Flashback) Mizuto
    What?
[17:47] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    She told me how valiantly she persevered
[17:47] (Flashback) ---
    Philosophy
    
    • Philosophical Theory
    • Eastern Ideology
    • Western Ideology
    • Psychology
[17:50] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    during the fitness test
    despite her not being athletic.
[17:54] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    And not just that! She's opened up
    to me about all kinds of stuff.
[17:58] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    I was convinced she was perfect,
[18:00] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    but getting to know her made me
    feel so much closer to her.
[18:05] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Honestly, she's quite the cheeky little
    devil for making me feel this way.
[18:11] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    If she became my older sister,
    I'd wanna do so much for her.
[18:16] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Like wash her whole body
     till it's sparkling clean.
[18:19] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    And rub her up and down with
    rose-scented body cream when we're done.
[18:23] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Then I'd help her into a dainty,
    crystal-white negligee.
[18:28] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Oh, but so many choices!
[18:30] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    I could just as easily put her in
     Japanese attire after her bath!
[18:33] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Hang on! When we're sisters,
    we'll be around each other 365 days a year.
[18:38] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    We can alternate every other day!
[18:40] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Yup, yup, yup!
[18:44] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Hey, let's get married already.
[18:47] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    I'm pretty loyal, you know?
[18:50] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    So, Irido-kun...
[18:51] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Made up your mind yet?
[18:54] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    Gosh, so this'll be my home too one day...
[18:57] (Flashback) Akatsuki
    It'd be pretty cool to share
    a room with Yume-chan.
[19:03] Mizuto
    So that's what I've been dealing with.
[19:06] Mizuto
    You've known her for a while,
     right, Kawanami?
[19:11] Mizuto
    Give it to me straight.
     What kind of person is she?
[19:14] Mizuto
    Intensely passionate with little
    prospect of simmering down.
[19:18] Mizuto
    Once she gets hooked on something,
     it consumes her.
[19:21] Mizuto
    And her infatuation only continues to boil.
[19:24] Mizuto
    Until finally, one day...
[19:29] Mizuto
    Kaboom!
[19:30] Mizuto
    An explosive end.
[19:31] Mizuto
    What do mean by "explosive"?
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Lock
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Power
    On/Off
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    On/Off
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Deep Fry
    On/Off
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Preheat Temp
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Intensity
[19:34] Buttons (Left to Right; Top to Bottom)
    Deep Fry
[19:34] Kogure
    Well...
[19:36] Kogure
    I'm reluctant to throw her
    under the bus like this,
[19:39] Kogure
    but let me give you an example.
[19:41] Kogure
    Back in middle school,
    Minami had a boyfriend.
[19:45] Mizuto
    What?
[19:46] Kogure
    Some guys are idiots, you know?
[19:48] Kogure
    As you might imagine,
    she was exceptionally devoted.
[19:52] Kogure
    They spent every waking moment together,
[19:54] ---
    as she relentlessly tended to his every need.
[19:57] Kogure
    And, of course, her boyfriend
    was happy in the beginning.
[20:00] Kogure
    It's great to have a girl you like,
    especially a decently pretty one,
[20:05] Kogure
    fawn over you like that.
[20:08] Kogure
    No guy on the planet would argue with that.
[20:12] Kogure
    But three months went by,
[20:16] ---
    and do you know what happened?
[20:19] Kogure
    He collapsed from stress
    and was hospitalized.
[20:24] Kogure
    And that's the frightening
    thing about Minami Akatsuki.
[20:29] Kogure
    That girl...
[20:31] Kogure
    She'll dote on you,
    tormenting you, plaguing you!
[20:36] Kogure
    Until one day, it finally kills you.
[20:40] Mizuto
    That all sounds a little far-fetched,
[20:42] Mizuto
    although it's honestly
    not that hard to imagine.
[20:45] Kogure
    Well, as long as you
     stand your ground with her,
[20:48] Kogure
    you should be fine.
[20:50] Kogure
    She may be persistent,
    but don't go wavering on me, all right?
[20:54] Kogure
    If she gets to be too much,
[20:56] Kogure
    we'll have to come up with
    a more direct approach.
[21:00] Mizuto
    I'd rather have that sooner than later.
[21:05] Kogure
    Very well.
[21:06] Kogure
    All you have to do is get her to give
    up on her obsession with Irido-san.
[21:11] Kogure
    And I already have a tactic in mind.
[21:14] Kogure
    Irido Mizuto, you must now go to
    Irido-san and tell her this...
[21:33] Yume
    What is it?
[21:34] Mizuto
    I'd like to exercise your punishment now.
[21:37] Yume
    My punishment?
[21:38] Mizuto
    Right.
[21:39] Mizuto
    For violating the norms of sibling behavior
[21:42] Mizuto
    in light of the underwear incident.
[21:44] Yume
    Oh, that?
[21:46] Yume
    As long as it doesn't
    infringe upon any social norms,
[21:49] ---
    we each get to make a demand, correct?
[21:51] Yume
    So, what is it you'd have me do?
[22:00] Mizuto
    Go on a date with me tomorrow.