E1 - RAGE AGAINST AKIHABARA

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Protect Otaku
[00:18] Anime Otaku
    You gotta pull the trigger like this, right?
[00:22] Military Otaku
    That's dangerous, man!
[00:24] Game Otaku
    Up, up, down, down...
[00:26] Game Otaku
    I put in the invincibility
    code, so I should be safe.
[00:30] Train Otaku
    Ah! I can't believe it!
[00:31] Doll Otaku
    What's wrong?
[00:32] Train Otaku
    The overnight special express Ethiopia is
[00:34] Train Otaku
    supposed to be passing
    through Tokyo right now!
SIGN    Special
    Express
    Ethiopia
[00:36] Game Otaku
    Who the hell cares?!
[00:37] Train Otaku
    This isn't happening!
[00:39] JSDF Otaku
    Hold it in!
[00:40] Military Otaku
    Swallow it! Swallow it!
[00:41] Pilot
    We've arrived. I'm opening the hatch.
[00:51] Kyotaro
    Hey there, Otaku Hero!
    Want me to cast a bravery spell?
[00:57] Otaku Hero
    I wish you had asked sooner.
[01:04] Otaku Hero
    Let's start the operation
    and try not to die.
[01:06] Otaku Hero
    Follow me!
[01:07] Anarchy
    I can't let you do that.
[01:09] Anarchy
    The first to go
[01:11] Anarchy
    has got to be me!
[01:14] Anarchy
    First train departing!
[01:16] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan!
[01:18] Otaku Hero
    Your parachute! Parachute!
[01:20] Anarchy
    Here I go. Transform!
SIGN    2008
[01:38] Otaku Hero
    If I don't hurry,
    they're gonna sell out
[01:42] Otaku Hero
    of the limited first run edition!
[01:45] Otaku Hero
    Huh?
SIGN    Anime
    Game
[01:48] Otaku Hero
    Some kind of event?
[01:51] Otaku Hero
    Ah, excuse me! Huh?
SIGN    New
    Releases
SIGN    Action
SIGN    Simulation
SIGN    Shooting
SIGN    Popular!!!
SIGN    Newest Releases
[01:59] Otaku Hero
    What's going on?
[02:01] Otaku Hero
    Oh! There's one left!
SIGN    Limited First Run Edition!!
    Includes Bonus Materials
[02:03] Otaku Hero
    Whoa! You're mine, first run edition!
[02:14] Cofficer
    Retrieval complete.
[02:19] Cofficer
    All right. On to the next one.
[02:23] Otaku Hero
    What the hell are you doing?
[02:26] Otaku Hero
    Give that back... to me!
[02:30] Cofficer
    Let go.
[02:31] Cofficer
    If you continue to protest,
    I'll take you into protection.
[02:35] Otaku Hero
    Protection?
[02:42] Anime Otaku
    Let go!
[02:43] Anime Otaku
    That's the legendary kabe
    circle issue! Give it back!
[02:47] Doll Otaku
    I spent three years searching for that!
[02:49] Doll Otaku
    And it's mint!
[02:52] Train Otaku
    Now that's an unusual vehicle!
[02:59] Slayer
    What a pleasant sound.
[03:00] Pro-Wrestling Otaku
    Hey! Divine Lariat!
[03:05] Slayer
    Trying to give me an uninvited clothesline?
[03:07] Slayer
    How very rude of you!
[03:16] Slayer
    Your bark is worse than your bite.
[03:18] Pro-Wrestling Otaku
    Wh-Who the hell are you?
[03:22] Pro-Wrestling Otaku
    Ah, that smells nice.
[03:25] Slayer
    What gives trash like you
    the right to smell me?!
[03:29] Pro-Wrestling Otaku
    How are you?!
SIGN    General Fan
SIGN    Today's Weather
SIGN    Tokyo
SIGN    Saitama
[03:53] Otaku Hero
    It began without any warning.
SIGN    Nakano, Tokyo
[04:06] Otaku Hero
    People known as otaku,
    regardless of preferred genre,
SIGN    Nipponbashi, Osaka
SIGN    Figurines, Hobbies
    Ota-Road Main Store
[04:12] Otaku Hero
    became targets of
    the government's "protection" efforts.
SIGN    New Bldg. #2
[04:22] Otaku Hero
    Nobody was able to stop them.
SIGN    Otaku Protection Rates: 95%
SIGN    If you see an otaku, contact the SSC.
[04:26] Otaku Hero
    They said they wanted to protect
    a world-famous culture.
SIGN    Otaku Protection Rates: 95%
[04:29] Otaku Hero
    For some reason, nobody questioned that.
[04:40] Otaku Hero
    Otaku disappeared from view.
[04:50] Otaku Hero
    It only took a single week.
[05:05] Otaku Hero
    But then, we launched our resistance.
SIGN    Die
    otaku!
SIGN    Otaku
    get out!
SIGN    Otaku
    disappear!
SIGN    Gross!
    Die otaku!
SIGN    Die otaku!
SIGN    Present Day, 2011
SIGN    Pedestrian-Only Zone Ahead
[05:29] Anarchy
    Hey.
[05:31] Anarchy
    We've sucked our food reserves dry.
    That's all we got.
[05:34] Otaku Hero
    Oh, right.
[05:36] Otaku Hero
    We'll have to go on another supply run.
[05:38] Game Otaku
    Yeah, but I shit bricks every
    time we meet with our supporters.
[05:42] Game Otaku
    What're we gonna do?
[05:43] Otaku Hero
    I'll figure something out.
[05:45] Kyotaro
    Something, yeah?
[05:46] Otaku Hero
    Yeah, something.
[05:56] Otaku Hero
    Huh?
[05:59] Kyotaro
    Whoa!
[06:01] other otaku
    Whoa!
[06:05] Kyotaro
    What?!
[06:06] Anarchy
    Geez, you almost got me pregnant!
[06:10] Otaku Hero
    Quit messing around, Anarchy-chan.
[06:13] Kyotaro
    And I was so looking forward to
    a bizarre plot twist.
[06:16] Otaku Hero
    Huh?
[06:25] Anarchy
    Damn it!
[06:26] Kyotaro
    They never let up, do they?
[06:30] Military Otaku
    Sir! A report from the mobile patrol!
[06:33] Otaku Hero
    All right.
[06:35] Otaku Hero
    You know, you could just tell me.
[06:37] Kyotaro
    He never lets up, either.
[06:39] Anarchy
    So, what does it say?
[06:41] Otaku Hero
    Another truck full of otaku
    was sent to the protection zone.
[06:44] Anarchy
    Huh? Damn it!
[06:47] Anarchy
    The damn Shobon Army again!
[06:50] Anarchy
    Hey, Otaku Hero.
[06:53] Anarchy
    We've got to find Blue and Pink.
[06:56] Anarchy
    I mean, it's their fault
    that they got lost,
[06:59] Anarchy
    but when the three of us
    magical girls get together,
[07:02] Anarchy
    nothing can ever stop us!
[07:05] Otaku Hero
    Blue-chan was in the abducted group, too.
[07:09] Anarchy
    That horny, blue, psycho bitch!
[07:12] Otaku Hero
    It might be time to call it quits.
[07:15] Anarchy
    Quits? What do you mean?
[07:19] Otaku Hero
    How long since the Shobon goons appeared?
[07:21] Otaku Hero
    About three years?
[07:23] Otaku Hero
    We survived the hell of the otaku hunts,
[07:25] Otaku Hero
    and then otaku from around the country
    gathered to light the flames of revolution.
[07:30] Otaku Hero
    We made it this far thanks to all of you.
[07:32] Game Otaku
    No! It was all thanks to you!
[07:34] Anime Otaku
    There's no way we could've
    fought back without you!
[07:37] Doll Otaku
    This is a liberated zone now!
[07:40] Otaku Hero
    Yeah.
[07:41] Otaku Hero
    You all worked hard to retake Akiba.
[07:45] Otaku Hero
    But our fighting power shrinks by the day.
[07:49] Otaku Hero
    We even have to steal
    weapons from the enemy.
[07:52] Otaku Hero
    The supporters who bring us food
    have to walk a very dangerous line.
[07:57] Otaku Hero
    So I think—
[07:58] Anarchy
    So you think? You think what?
[08:00] Anarchy
    If you're gonna act this pathetic,
    why don't I take the leader's chair from you!?
[08:05] Otaku Hero
    Why not? Give it a shot.
[08:08] Anarchy
    Huh?!
[08:08] Kyotaro
    You're passing it to her?
[08:10] Otaku Hero
    I've had enough.
[08:14] Anarchy
    Wait! Otaku Hero!
[08:17] Anarchy
    Don't you dare wuss out on me!
[08:19] Military Otaku
    Give it up, Anarchy-chan.
[08:20] Anarchy
    Huh?
[08:22] Military Otaku
    We did basically rely on him for everything.
[08:27] Military Otaku
    Am I wrong?
[08:29] Military Otaku
    Even the flames of revolution need to
    be fueled, or else they may be extinguished.
[08:33] Anarchy
    You might be right, but still...
[08:37] Anarchy
    Still...
[09:05] Kyotaro
    Like a damn chimney.
[09:14] Anime Otaku
    Did you mean it?
[09:16] Anarchy
    Did you really mean
    you'll quit being leader?
[09:20] Otaku Hero
    Things are only gonna go downhill from here.
[09:23] Anarchy
    Well yeah, and that's
    why we need to rescue Blue!
[09:27] Otaku Hero
    Go for it, Anarchy-chan.
    You're the leader, right?
[09:29] Anarchy
    That's not what I'm saying!
[09:31] Anarchy
    With me, Blue, and Pink...
[09:34] Anarchy
    With us magical girls
    and you together, we can fight!
[09:37] Anarchy
    We can make the world a place where
    you can like whatever you want to like again!
[09:41] Anarchy
    You were the leader
    who was supposed to take us there,
[09:45] Anarchy
    Otaku Hero!
[09:46] Otaku Hero
    It just isn't my thing.
[09:48] Anarchy
    Huh?
[09:49] Otaku Hero
    Leave that stuff to the guys
    who can or want to do it.
[09:53] Otaku Hero
    Isn't it the same in anime?
[09:55] Otaku Hero
    The leaders and heroes either
    are ready to kick ass from the start,
[09:59] Otaku Hero
    or they say they "don't want to fight"
    and still kick ass anyway.
[10:03] Anarchy
    And you're saying you're neither type?
[10:09] Anarchy
    Hello?
[10:10] Train Otaku
    Turn on the TV! Right now!
[10:12] Kyotaro
    Here.
SIGN    New Segment! Celebrities who Smoke!
SIGN    Emergency Alert
[10:13] TV host
    We couldn't make it happen!
[10:13] Anarchy
    "The government has announced
    a major protection action
[10:18] Anarchy
    targeted at key areas of the Chiyoda
    and Taito wards for tomorrow"?!
[10:25] Anarchy
    So you're sure?
[10:26] Anarchy
    Then I'll become leader.
[10:28] Anarchy
    But no takebacks or redos later on, okay?
[10:32] Otaku Hero
    Yeah.
[10:35] Anarchy
    Fine.
[10:39] Anarchy
    Listen up, creeps!
[10:41] Anarchy
    In preparation
    for the expected enemy action,
[10:44] Anarchy
    the Akiba Liberated Zone
    is now going on 24-hour battle alert!
[10:48] Anarchy
    And I, Anarchy-chan, am taking command!
[10:53] Mob otaku
    Yeah!
[10:55] Anarchy
    Open the armory!
[11:00] Anarchy
    A Unit, gather at Suehirocho.
[11:02] Anarchy
    Hey, hey! Get moving, B Unit!
[11:04] Anarchy
    Hurry up, hurry up!
SIGN    O
    T
    OTAKU
    K
    U
[11:27] Otaku
    Yay!
[11:41] Otaku
    Akihabara successfully recaptured!
[11:46] Otaku
    Yeah!
[11:48] Otaku
    Woo-hoo!
SIGN    O
    T
    OTAKU
    K
    U
SIGN    Pink Hero
    Legend
[12:06] (Flashback) Anarchy
    I'll show you magic tomorrow.
[12:09] (Flashback) Otaku Hero
    Magic?
[12:10] (Flashback) Anarchy
    My fire magic.
[12:13] (Flashback) Anarchy
    And if that doesn't change your mind,
[12:16] (Flashback) Anarchy
    then I'll become leader
    and bring Blue back myself!
[12:33] Train Otaku
    Ah! They're here!
[12:41] Cofficer
    To the designated protected
    individuals occupying this district:
[12:45] Cofficer
    End your resistance
    and surrender immediately!
[12:48] Cofficer
    Just like your comrades,
    we absolutely will not treat you poorly!
[12:51] Game Otaku
    Lying pig!
[12:52] Cofficer
    If you refuse, we will use our
    resources to protect you all.
[12:59] Cofficer
    What's this?
[13:03] Cofficer
    If that's how you want it...
[13:05] Cofficer
    All units, follow established policies
    and commence action!
[13:10] Game Otaku
    They aren't holding back.
[13:13] Game Otaku
    Fire, fire!
[13:15] Cofficer
    Log unit, advance!
SIGN    Canned Oden
[13:24] Cofficer
    Oh, no!
[13:24] Cofficer
    Watch out!
[13:26] JSDF Otaku
    We won't give up one inch!
[13:28] Idol Otaku
    We'll never surrender to you!
[13:30] Otaku A
    What's happening up top?
[13:31] Otaku B
    They're making progress.
[13:33] Otaku C
    Where's Anarchy-chan?
[13:34] Otaku B
    I haven't seen her, but everyone's
    following the plan, so we should be okay!
[13:46] Anarchy
    This is a stairway to hell
    when you're out of shape!
[13:49] Kyotaro
    You sure are being dramatic about it.
[13:52] Anarchy
    Shut up!
[13:53] Kyotaro
    Why do you have to run up anyway?
[13:56] Kyotaro
    Where's your transformation bag?
[13:57] Anarchy
    I don't need it. Not now, anyway.
[14:03] Kyotaro
    Oh, no! You're gonna have to give u—
[14:07] Kyotaro
    The hell?!
[14:08] Anarchy
    I can't let something like this stop me!
[14:11] Kyotaro
    So transform, then!
[14:14] Cofficer
    We've made a way through. Charge!
[14:18] Cofficer A
    One protected!
[14:20] Cofficer B
    Two protected!
[14:22] Cofficer B
    And a whole bunch more,
[14:23] Cofficer B
    all protected!
[14:25] JSDF Otaku
    The barricade has been breached!
[14:27] JSDF Otaku
    You have to take command, Otaku Hero!
[14:30] JSDF Otaku
    It has to be you!
[14:33] JSDF Otaku
    Why won't you say anything?
[14:38] Anarchy
    Listen up, punks!
[14:46] Game Otaku
    Otaku Hero, it's Anarchy-chan!
[14:53] Anarchy
    Up here!
[14:56] Anarchy
    I'll show you what
    Anarchy-chan's magic can do!
[14:59] Anarchy
    Open your eyeballs
    and take a good look!
[15:02] Anarchy
    You impotent, rotten dick
    cheese sons of bitches!
[15:07] Chief Cofficer
    It's a magical girl.
[15:08] Chief Cofficer
    Incendiary rounds! Fire!
[15:13] Anarchy
    Think you can hit me?
[15:14] Kyotaro
    They're trying to kill us!
[15:16] Kyotaro
    RIP me!
[15:19] Anarchy
    RIP what? You're so full of it.
[15:21] Kyotaro
    Oh, you caught me?
[15:22] Kyotaro
    Watch out!
SIGN    O
    T
    OTAKU
    K
    U
[15:32] Game Otaku
    That's the...
[15:33] Train Otaku
    ...flag of our revolution!
[15:34] JSDF Otaku
    It represents...
[15:35] Idol Otaku
    ...the dreams of all otaku!
[15:37] Anarchy
    Remember, Otaku Hero!
[15:40] Anarchy
    You wanted to protect what you love.
[15:42] Anarchy
    That urge, that drive, that fire—!
[15:53] Anarchy
    Otaku Hero!
[15:57] Anarchy
    Do you see it?
[15:59] Anarchy
    This means... I'm the leader now.
[16:04] Anarchy
    Got a problem with that?
[16:10] Anarchy
    I'm the leader now! I am!
[16:15] Anarchy
    I wanted everyone to know... but...
[16:21] Anarchy
    the only leader I really want
    is you, Otaku Hero!
[16:29] Otaku Hero
    Quit crying, Anarchy-chan.
[16:33] Otaku Hero
    Your spell worked on me.
[16:35] Otaku Hero
    Your magic set my heart
    on fire, Anarchy-chan.
[16:43] Otaku Hero
    Here, take this.
[16:44] Otaku Hero
    You left it behind on purpose, right?
[16:47] Anarchy
    Oh. Yeah!
[16:50] Kyotaro
    By the way, how did you get up here?
[16:52] Otaku Hero
    In that!
[16:56] Kyotaro & Anarchy
    A blimp?!
[17:12] Otaku Hero
    Listen up, everyone!
[17:14] Otaku Hero
    We're gonna use this thing
    to annihilate the enemy.
[17:16] Otaku Hero
    And then we're gonna rescue Blue!
[17:18] Otaku Hero
    I'm the leader of the revolutionary army!
[17:20] Otaku Hero
    Otaku Hero!
[17:21] Otaku Hero
    Got a problem with that?
[17:23] Otaku
    Ooh!
[17:23] Otaku
    No objection!
[17:31] Otaku Hero
    They call this a "natural protection zone"
    where otaku can fulfill their otaku desires,
[17:35] Otaku Hero
    but it's actually just a jail.
[17:37] Otaku Hero
    No, a fortress.
[17:39] Otaku Hero
    They have jail cells lined up
    in a wide-open exhibition space.
[17:42] Otaku Hero
    And the watchtower guarding it all is
[17:44] Otaku Hero
    Tokyo Big Sight!
[17:46] Otaku Hero
    Let's start the operation
    and try not to die.
[17:48] Otaku Hero
    Follow me!
[17:49] Anarchy
    I can't let you do that.
[17:51] Anarchy
    The first to go
[17:53] Anarchy
    has got to be me!
[17:57] Anarchy
    First train departing!
[17:58] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan!
[17:59] Otaku Hero
    Your parachute! Parachute!!
[18:03] Anarchy
    Thank you, Otaku Hero.
[18:05] Anarchy
    Here I go. Transform!
[18:36] Anarchy
    Here to destroy both chaos and order,
[18:38] Anarchy
    Magical Girl Anarchy!
[18:41] Anarchy
    If you act naughty,
[18:42] Anarchy
    I'll blow you to bits!
[18:49] Anarchy
    Heaven's Inferno!
SIGN    Heaven's Inferno
SIGN    O
    T
    OTAKU
    K
    U
[18:54] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan, set it on fire!
[18:56] Anarchy
    Okay!
[18:58] Anarchy
    Heaven's Paradise!
[19:04] Guard A
    What?!
[19:10] Guard B
    What? Wait! Cut it out!
[19:18] Otaku Hero
    Good job!
[19:22] otaku
    Get them!
[19:23] otaku
    We did it!
[19:27] Kyotaro
    Where's Blue at?
[19:29] Anarchy
    That horny, blue, psycho bitch?
[19:32] Otaku Hero
    What's that?
SIGN    Blue Is Here
[19:33] Otaku Hero
    She's in there!
[19:36] Otaku Hero
    Watch out!
[19:38] Anarchy
    I got this!
[19:40] Cofficers
    Fire! Fire!
[19:44] Anarchy
    No Hit, No Life!
SIGN    No Hit, No Life!!
[19:50] Kyotaro
    She's murdering!
[19:51] Otaku Hero
    That's our Anarchy-chan!
[19:59] Otaku Hero
    Is that...
[20:01] Otaku Hero
    Blue-chan!
[20:04] Otaku Hero
    We came to save you!
[20:10] Otaku Hero
    What the hell is that?!
[20:11] Kyotaro
    This time we're all definitely dead!
[20:16] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan!
[20:24] Kyotaro
    Anarchy!
[20:24] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan!
[20:35] Otaku Hero
    Anarchy-chan!
[20:40] Anarchy
    He done? My turn, then.
[21:04] Otaku Hero
    Blue-chan!
[21:05] Otaku Hero
    Blue-chan!
[21:12] Blue
    Otaku Hero-sama?!
[21:16] Blue
    And Analchy-chan...
[21:17] Anarchy
    It's Anarchy!
[21:19] Anarchy
    Geez. You're always so stupid.
[21:22] Anarchy
    How could a girl like you get trapped
    in a place like this anyway?
[21:26] Blue
    Yeah...
[21:27] Blue
    I went to hook up with someone I met online
    and somehow ended up here.
SIGN    Happy Happy Mail
    Aomi-san's Profile
    View Image View Image View Image
    Job: Magical Girl
    Blood Type: Secret
    Sex Drive: Max+
    Area: Tokyo
    Things I'm Into: Toys, Bondage
    Comment: I'm super kinky
     Hobbies: Sex
     Personality: Proactive
     Skills: Magic
[21:31] Anarchy
    I'm gonna kill you!
[21:32] Blue
    Oh, thank you!
[21:33] Anarchy
    You seriously don't have
    any standards, do you?
[21:34] Blue
    Ooh! Ooh!
[21:36] Anarchy
    You total slut!
SIGN    O
    T
    OTAKU
    K
    U
[21:37] Blue
    Yes, thank you so much!
[21:40] Shobon
    It looks like it's begun. Our game is on.
[21:44] Slayer
    Things are finally going to get interesting.
[21:48] Slayer
    With Otaku Hero,
    Magical Girl Blue, and Anarchy.
[23:25] Slayer (?)
    A red girl, a blue girl,
    and the last magical girl.
[23:30] Slayer (?)
    Their desire to fight, their despair
    of loss has now gotten in the groove.
[23:34] Slayer (?)
    They can't let themselves get burned out now.
[23:37] Slayer (?)
    They'll be tested. Dive in.