E12 - We Opened a Coffee Shop

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:18] Falfa
    Wow, how pretty!
[00:19] Azusa
    That's right. I guess it
    is festival season now.
[00:23] Laika
    What sort of festival is it?
[00:25] Shalsha
    It's Flatta's dance festival.
[00:27] Shalsha
    It started about 250 years ago,
[00:30] Shalsha
    and everyone dances however they please
    in the town square or the highlands.
[00:33] Shalsha
    It's about offering the fruits
    of the harvest to the earth god
[00:37] Shalsha
    and praying for a bountiful
    harvest next year.
[00:40] Shalsha
    The celebration lasts two days,
    both on the festival's eve and the day of the festival.
[00:44] Halkara
    It's nice to be able to
    dance however you please!
[00:49] Laika
    Are you going to participate, Lady Azusa?
[00:51] Azusa
    I distance myself from this one a bit.
[00:54] Azusa
    I've been living around here since
    before the festival started,
[00:57] Azusa
    so if I'm not careful, I could end
    up being given the starring role.
[01:02] Laika
    I see...
[01:04] Falfa
    Does this festival have stalls
    that sell sweet candies?
[01:07] Shalsha
    The study of festivals is
    historically important.
[01:11] Halkara
    You know, drinks can be
    sold at festivals, too.
[01:14] Halkara
    Even at higher prices,
    they sell like hotcakes.
[01:16] Halkara
    At times, I felt like they make
    a little too much profit...
[01:17] Azusa
    That's true... My family
    did grow all of a sudden.
[01:24] Azusa
    Since we're here, maybe I'll try to change
    how I interact with these things.
[01:31] Azusa
    What should I do, though?
[01:33] Halkara
    More fruit wine, please!
[01:36] Azusa
    Halkara, you can drink,
    but don't go overboard, okay?
[01:39] Halkara
    I make drinks out of plants myself,
[01:43] Halkara
    so I can't help drinking them to compare...
[01:46] Azusa
    She can make drinks...
[01:48] Laika
    I see.
[01:50] Laika
    They add pepper as a secret ingredient.
[01:52] Laika
    I'm going to try making
    this sauce sometime.
[01:56] Azusa
    And she can cook...
[01:57] Falfa
    Mama!
[01:59] Falfa
    Have some water!
[02:00] Shalsha
    I got some share plates.
[02:02] Azusa
    Thanks, you two.
[02:08] Azusa
    And we have two cute waitresses!
[02:10] Azusa
    I have an idea!
[02:12] Azusa
    We'll open a coffee shop called
    The Witch's House on festival's eve!
SIGN    I've Been Killing Slimes for 300 Years
    and Maxed Out My Level
SIGN    We Opened a Coffee Shop
SIGN    We Opened a Coffee Shop
[03:51] Rosalie
    Sister, it's here!
[03:53] SFX
    Ta-da!
[03:56] Halkara
    What is this?
[03:58] Azusa
    Waitress uniforms for The Witch's House.
[04:00] Azusa
    Remember when we all got
    measured the other day?
[04:13] Azusa
    Let's all try them on right now!
[04:20] Azusa
    Well, I guess it works.
[04:22] Falfa
    Mama!
[04:25] SFX
    Float, float...
[04:25] Falfa
    How do we look?
[04:27] Shalsha
    It doesn't feel that bad...
[04:29] SFX
    Blush!
[04:30] SFX
    Hug!
[04:31] Azusa
    Yes! You're adorable!
[04:32] Halkara
    Um...
[04:34] SFX
    Boing, boing.
[04:35] Halkara
    They took my measurements,
    but the chest is still so tight...
[04:39] SFX
    Plump.
[04:42] Azusa
    What kind of shady shop are we running?!
[04:44] Azusa
    Halkara, if you wear that,
    you're banned from the shop.
[04:46] SFX
    Shock!
[04:47] Halkara
    We haven't even opened up yet!
[04:49] Falfa
    Flatorte, you look so cute!
[04:51] Shalsha
    It's very harmonious.
[04:53] Shalsha
    It's almost as if they used
    the golden ratio somehow.
[04:56] Flatorte
    Y-You think so?
[04:57] Flatorte
    Personally, I find it very restrictive.
[04:59] Flatorte
    I feel more comfortable naked.
[05:01] Flatorte
    The great Flatorte will
    fight this battle naked!
[05:05] Azusa
    There's no way that's better!
[05:06] Rosalie
    Aw, you're all so lucky.
[05:09] Rosalie
    I wish I could try something on, too.
[05:12] Azusa
    You'll be changing your
    outfit, too, of course.
[05:16] Azusa
    Allow this outstretched
    hand to reach the other side!
[05:22] Azusa
    Work, magic!
[05:24] Azusa
    Change, Rosalie!
[05:32] SFX
    Sparkle, sparkle, sparkle, sparkle!
[05:35] Rosalie
    Wow, this is great!
[05:37] Rosalie
    Thank you, Sister!
[05:39] Azusa
    Sure. You look great.
[05:43] Azusa
    Now, that just leaves Laika...
[05:54] Azusa
    A god... There's a god here...
[06:01] Laika
    It, um...
[06:03] Laika
    doesn't look too odd, does it?
[06:06] Both
    Priceless...
[06:08] Laika
    I wore something like this for
    a school play long ago...
[06:12] Laika
    I got the same reaction and
    felt just as embarrassed.
[06:15] Azusa
    Oh, that embarrassed face!
[06:18] Both
    Priceless!
[06:19] SFX
    Freeze...
[06:21] Laika
    Please don't say the same
    thing over and over!
[06:24] Azusa
    All right! Now we come up with our menu!
[06:28] SFX
    Hop!
[06:29] Halkara
    Sounds like it's my turn!
[06:33] Halkara
    I've already come up with this!
[06:36] Azusa
    Hmm...
[06:37] Azusa
    Okay, this "Fifteen-Flavor
    Aphrodisiac Drink Blend" is out.
[06:41] Halkara
    Why?! It was a huge hit
    among the men of Flatta!
[06:45] Guy
    I'm still in my prime!
[06:47] SFX
    Pop!
[06:47] Azusa
    That's not the image we want!
[06:48] Azusa
    And this "Drink Daily to Grow Taller in a Month!
    Bone-Lengthening Herbal Blend" is out, too.
[06:51] SFX
    Shabam!
[06:53] Azusa
    Come up with something more normal!
[06:56] Halkara
    Well, if you want something else...
[06:59] Halkara
    All I have is this "Wild Grape and Honey Juice
    with a Light Flavor and Pleasant Aftertaste."
[07:04] Azusa
    That's what you should've given me first!
[07:07] Laika
    Honestly, you have no
    sense for this at all.
[07:10] Flatorte
    You're the one who lacks sense!
[07:13] Azusa
    What's all the fuss over here?
[07:16] Laika
    Lady Azusa!
[07:17] Laika
    Please hear out my idea!
[07:19] Laika
    Anyone who can eat this giant
    omelet within 30 minutes
[07:22] Laika
    gets their meal free! What do you think?
[07:24] Azusa
    Uh, I'm not sure we want
    competitive eating material...
[07:30] Flatorte
    It's unthinkable!
[07:31] Flatorte
    What is cooking without meat?
[07:33] Flatorte
    So we serve endless delicious meat dishes!
[07:36] SFX
    Om.
[07:36] Flatorte
    This is all we need!
[07:43] Azusa
    No, it's not!
[07:45] Azusa
    Both of you are wrong!
[07:48] Laika
    Then what about topping boiled pasta
    with sweet cream for something unique?
[07:53] Azusa
    I like that you're up for a challenge,
    but that's not necessary!
[07:56] Halkara
    Master!
[07:56] SFX
    Shine!
[07:57] SFX
    Slide, slide...
[07:58] Halkara
    Then let's serve a full-course meal
    using 36 types of mushrooms!
[08:03] Azusa
    Some are gonna be poisonous, though.
[08:05] Falfa
    Mama!
[08:07] Falfa
    Look at the big grasshopper I caught!
[08:09] Falfa
    What if we cook this grasshopper?
[08:11] Azusa
    We can't serve that in the shop.
[08:13] Azusa
    I'll come up with the menu!
[08:16] Rosalie
    There we go.
[08:20] Rosalie
    All right, that's done!
[08:41] Natalie
    Great Witch!
[08:42] Natalie
    I look forward to seeing your shop.
[08:46] Falfa
    It's a coffee shop, The Witch's House!
[08:48] Shalsha
    It's opening tomorrow.
[08:50] Laika
    Please come and visit.
[08:52] Flatorte
    Check out our coffee shop,
    The Witch's House!
[08:54] Rosalie
    We'll have tasty food!
[08:55] Laika
    Please come and visit.
[08:56] Flatorte
    You'd better come!
[08:58] Halkara
    Here you go!
[09:03] Shalsha
    Not bad.
[09:05] Azusa
    Thanks, everyone.
[09:07] Azusa
    So, tomorrow's the day we open.
[09:10] Azusa
    Though I'm not sure if anyone will come...
[09:12] Azusa
    No, the most important thing
    is that we have fun.
[09:16] Azusa
    Let's all have fun tomorrow!
[09:19] All
    Yeah!
[09:36] Azusa
    Well, gotta start getting
    things ready early...
SIGN    I've Been Killing Slimes
    for 300 Years and
    Maxed Out My Level
[09:57] Laika
    This is...
[09:58] Falfa
    Wow...
[09:59] Shalsha
    They're even coming from outside of Flatta.
[10:02] Halkara
    Hmm, lining up overnight
    is against the rules.
[10:05] SFX
    Slither...
[10:05] Rosalie
    Nope, I heard the first ones rushed
    here first thing in the morning.
[10:08] Halkara
    That's okay, then!
[10:11] Azusa
    We'll have to open ahead of schedule!
[10:15] All
    Yeah!
[10:20] Azusa
    Our coffee shop, The Witch's House,
    is opening one hour early!
[10:26] Azusa
    Nobody cheers like that for
    a coffee shop opening!
[10:36] Three
    Welcome!
[10:38] Three
    Welcome!
[10:40] All
    Welcome to our coffee shop,
    The Witch's House!
[10:49] Customer 1(F)
    The Great Witch looks
    beautiful as a waitress...
[10:51] SFX
    Float...
[10:55] Customer 2(M)
    And Halkara looks like the perfect
    balance of wholesome and unwholesome.
[10:56] SFX
    Float...
[11:00] Falfa
    May we take your order?
[11:03] Shalsha
    Here's some water.
[11:05] Customer 3(F)
    Her twin daughters couldn't be cuter!
[11:07] Customer 1(F)
    Yes, but above all...
[11:11] Laika
    Thank you for waiting.
[11:13] Laika
    Here is the omelet you ordered.
[11:17] Laika
    Please take your time enjoying your meal.
[11:21] Customer 4(M)
    She's a goddess.
[11:23] Customer 5(F)
    If I had a little sister like that,
    I'd be hugging her all the time.
[11:26] Customer 6(F)
    No words are needed... Just...
[11:29] Customers 1-6
    Priceless!
[11:30] Laika
    P-Please don't stare at me so much...
[11:34] Laika
    It's embarrassing...
[11:35] SFX
    Pshoom!
[11:36] Customer 8(M)
    Hey, hang in there!
[11:37] Customer 9(F)
    It's a shallow wound!
[11:39] Azusa
    What kind of shop is this?
[11:41] Flatorte
    I hate that Laika is getting
    all the attention!
[11:44] Flatorte
    I won't lose to her!
[11:46] SFX
    Bam! Bam! Bam!
[11:49] Flatorte
    I can carry all these at once!
[11:51] Customers
    Ooh!
[11:52] Male Customer
    Amazing!
[11:53] Female Customer
    How wonderful!
[11:53] Flatorte
    It's a piece of cake!
[11:54] Azusa
    Wait, if you try to do that...
[12:01] Rosalie
    That was a close one.
[12:04] Rosalie
    There!
[12:07] Customer 10(F)
    The ghost lady is the best!
[12:09] Customer 11(F)
    That's fantastic service!
[12:12] Rosalie
    Thanks.
[12:13] Azusa
    I guess people enjoy service with style.
[12:16] Halkara
    Master!
[12:19] Customer 12(M)
    This juice is really refreshing.
[12:21] Customer 13(F)
    And the soup warms me right up.
[12:24] Customer 13(F)
    It's so homely, but so elegant, too.
[12:27] Customer 14(F)
    The wall decorations are adorable.
[12:29] Halkara
    They all seem to enjoy both
    the food and the atmosphere.
[12:35] Azusa
    All right, everyone, keep up the good work!
[12:38] Falfa
    Okay!
[12:42] Laika
    Thank you very much.
[12:47] Shalsha
    I'm sorry, Mother.
    My feet can't take any more.
[12:51] Azusa
    No, I'm sorry I didn't notice.
[12:54] Azusa
    Just take it easy.
[12:57] Shalsha
    No, I'll take over the register.
[13:00] Shalsha
    This way, I can keep working.
[13:02] Azusa
    Thank you. But don't overdo it, okay?
[13:05] SFX
    Sputter, sputter...
[13:06] Halkara
    Here's your milk tea!
[13:08] Halkara
    Here's your salad with forest tree nuts!
[13:08] SFX
    Sputter, sputter...
[13:11] Rosalie
    So three coffees, a mini chiffon
    cake, and two fruit cakes...
[13:15] Rosalie
    And for you, a black tea, a milk,
    a special omelet, and a sandwich?
[13:19] Azusa
    It's a good kind of surprise, but I
    never thought we'd be this successful.
[13:23] Beelzebub
    What a fine shop.
[13:24] Azusa
    Thank you for waiting!
    How many in... your...
[13:27] Azusa
    Don't you have anything to do at work?
[13:29] Beelzebub
    You're being awfully rude to a customer.
[13:32] Azusa
    Did I tell you we were doing this?
[13:34] Beelzebub
    You did not!
[13:35] Beelzebub
    I only came because I
    happened to hear about it!
[13:38] Beelzebub
    Don't I always tell you to invite me
    along when you're doing something fun?
[13:40] SFX
    Hmph!
[13:42] Azusa
    Oh, she wanted to be invited.
[13:45] Azusa
    Hey, Beelzebub, it's not too late to
    help us serve customers if you want...
[13:50] Azusa
    I mean... i-if you could, maybe?
[13:54] Azusa
    I-If you can't, it's okay...
[13:58] Beelzebub
    I am a demon, you know.
[14:00] Beelzebub
    I'm not someone you can so
    easily ask for a favor.
[14:03] Beelzebub
    Don't let your head get so big.
[14:07] Azusa
    Beelzebub, that's... the back door...
[14:17] Beelzebub
    Well, I suppose I don't mind.
[14:19] Azusa
    You're raring to go!
    When did you change clothes?!
[14:22] Customer 15(F)
    She's the head waitress, but she has
    the intense aura of a queen...
[14:25] Customer 16(M)
    No, she has both the dignity of a soldier
[14:27] Customer 16(M)
    and the class of a proper lady.
[14:29] Customer 16(M)
    She gives off the scent
    of something forbidden!
[14:35] Beelzebub
    Welcome to our coffee shop, The Witch's House!
[14:39] Beelzebub
    When you've decided what you'd
    like to order, just let me know.
[14:44] Azusa
    She's perfect!
[14:55] Beelzebub
    Hey, cooks!
[14:57] Beelzebub
    An herb tea, carrot chiffon cake set,
[14:59] Beelzebub
    and two mixed juices, please!
[15:03] Laika
    She's turned out to be quite the helper.
[15:05] Azusa
    I can't believe she's even
    changed her tone of voice.
[15:08] Azusa
    With Beelzebub helping us now,
    maybe we can breathe a little easier.
[15:13] Azusa
    There's no sign of the crowd
    starting to thin, though...
[15:16] Pecora
    Okay, here we go!
[15:19] SFX
    Flick!
[15:20] Pecora
    Now do it with me, okay?
[15:23] Pecora
    Be delicious!
[15:25] SFX
    Float...
[15:29] Pecora
    I added a bit of little devil spice, too!
[15:32] Customers 17-19(F;M;M)
    Squee!
[15:34] Azusa
    You're way past "little devil"!
    What are you doing?!
[15:37] SFX
    Turn!
[15:37] Pecora
    Dear Sister!
[15:39] SFX
    Sparkle!
[15:39] Pecora
    What do you think?
    Does my outfit look cute?
[15:44] Azusa
    Should a Demon King who terrifies crying
    babies into silences be serving customers?
[15:47] Pecora
    Of course!
[15:48] Pecora
    I always wanted to be a part of
    a shop like this just once!
[15:52] Azusa
    Wait, if you're here, does that mean...
[16:03] Vania
    And here's your fosca sheep
    sauté with truffles!
[16:07] Azusa
    I thought so.
[16:09] Fatla
    It's the chef's special platter.
[16:11] Fatla
    My sister came up with an improved
    version for human palates.
[16:14] Azusa
    She just made herself the chef!
[16:16] Halkara
    Chef, one more of the special!
[16:18] Vania
    Got it!
[16:19] Azusa
    And it's already on the menu...
[16:21] Fatla
    Halkara, please take this
    dessert menu to table three.
[16:25] Halkara
    Yes, Manager!
[16:27] Azusa
    And Fatla's the floor manager now!
[16:29] Laika
    A group just came in!
[16:31] Azusa
    Huh?
[16:32] Rosalie
    I have an addition to an order!
[16:33] Azusa
    Huh?
[16:34] Falfa
    There are so many customers!
[16:35] Azusa
    Huh?!
[16:36] Fightie
    Master! Is that outfit some
    new kind of training?
[16:39] Fightie
    I'll help, too!
[16:42] Beelzebub
    What are you doing here?
[16:44] Eno
    I have some samples of the Eno
    brand's latest supplement!
[16:48] Eno
    Feel free to take one! Here you go!
[16:51] Halkara
    Hey! Did anyone say you could do that?
[16:56] Kuku
    Here's a free song for all
    the folks waiting in line!
[17:00] Flatorte
    Listen to the cries of
    Kuku and Flatorte's souls!
[17:06] Azusa
    This is turning into something
    kind of crazy...
[17:10] Azusa
    Nothing to do but continue doing my job!
[17:42] Natalie
    Great Witch, thank you for the lovely meal.
[17:45] Azusa/Laika
    Thank you for coming.
[17:49] Azusa
    Well, I guess we can close up now.
[17:52] Eno
    This new product uses fruit juice
    to counter the bitterness.
[17:55] Halkara
    Let's talk business sometime.
[17:58] Kuku
    Let's perform together again!
[17:59] Flatorte
    I'll write a song that'll
    make your heart tremble!
[18:02] Fightie
    Master, please spar with me!
[18:04] Beelzebub
    Just go home already.
[18:07] Pecora
    Dear Sister!
[18:09] SFX
    Flash!
[18:10] SFX
    Zoom!
[18:10] Pecora
    I had so much fun today!
[18:12] SFX
    Stretch!
[18:13] Pecora
    I'll come help again!
[18:13] SFX
    Hug!
[18:15] Vania
    See you next time.
[18:17] Fatla
    Goodbye.
[18:18] Azusa
    Thanks for your help, everyone.
[18:25] Azusa
    All right.
[18:26] Azusa
    Good work, everyone!
[18:28] Laika
    Same to you, Lady Azusa.
[18:36] Azusa
    We still need to clean up,
    but I guess we can take our time.
[18:56] Azusa
    It's been 300 years since
    I reincarnated here.
[18:58] Azusa
    After finding out I had maxed out my level,
[19:01] Azusa
    my life turned around completely.
[19:05] Azusa
    If this keeps up,
[19:06] Azusa
    I bet lots more fun and
    hectic things will happen.
[19:10] Azusa
    Although if I'm comparing my recent life
    to the 300 years before that,
[19:14] Azusa
    my recent life is still new, but I can
    confidently say it's had lots more fun times.
[19:20] Halkara
    The cost, list price, and profit...
[19:22] Rosalie
    Coffee and chocolate cake....
[19:23] Flatorte
    A biba non non!
[19:26] Azusa
    Living a slow life alone was nice,
[19:28] Azusa
    but living a slow life with others
    is special in its own way.
[19:32] Azusa
    And this is still the result of all
    those years defeating slimes,
[19:36] Azusa
    so I can't forget the debt
    I owe to the slimes.
[19:39] Azusa
    That said, there are slimes everywhere,
[19:42] Azusa
    so I'm sure I'll have to
    face one eventually.
[19:44] Azusa
    But for now, our coffee shop is done.
[19:52] Azusa
    I think I'd like to live a nice
    peaceful life for a while.
[20:31] Halkara
    Master.
[20:33] Halkara
    Tonight is the main event of
    Flatta's dance festival.
[20:36] Rosalie
    I wonder what it's like!
[20:38] Falfa
    I want to go!
[20:40] Shalsha
    I'm interested.
[20:41] Laika
    Lady Azusa, I'd like to go, as well.
[20:44] Azusa
    Then I guess we'll all go
    check it out tonight.
[20:46] Falfa
    Yay!
[20:48] Beelzebub
    I will show you my demon dance!
[20:52] Azusa
    Do you have nothing better to do?
[20:54] Beelzebub
    Wha—
[20:54] Beelzebub
    Have you no gratitude after all
    the work I did yesterday?
[20:57] SFX
    Slide!
[20:59] Falfa
    Thanks for helping yesterday, Beelzebub!
[21:01] Shalsha
    You were a big help.
[21:03] Beelzebub
    Oh, it was nothing.
[21:05] Beelzebub
    You can ask for my help again anytime.
[21:08] Rosalie
    You really can't resist those two, can you?
[21:08] Beelzebub
    There, there. You're so cute.
[21:12] Flatorte
    I'm gonna dance, too!
    I'll let it all hang out!
[21:15] Laika
    Don't you dare! You'll bring
    shame to all Dragons!
[21:19] SFX
    Boing, boing, boing, boing, boing...
[21:19] Halkara
    I'm quite confident in
    my dancing skills, too!
[21:23] Azusa
    I'd rather you didn't dance, either.
[21:26] Halkara
    Why not, Master?
[21:28] Laika
    At any rate, if you get out of hand
    at the festival, they'll ban you.
[21:32] Flatorte
    How rude!
[21:32] Halkara
    Come on, Master!
    What's wrong with my dancing?
[21:36] Azusa
    Look, just...
[21:37] Falfa
    Hey, Beelzebub!
[21:39] Shalsha
    What's your dance like?
[21:40] Beelzebub
    It's a mysterious dance handed down
    among demons that sucks out mana.
[21:44] Rosalie
    Another peaceful day...
[21:51] Azusa
    Yes, I'm coming.
[21:56] Azusa
    How can I help you?
[22:01] Azusa
    After 300 years of killing slimes,
[22:04] Azusa
    another fun day is about to begin.