E2 - Forced to travel with Carla, a healer...
Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:01] Alvin
Behold, the vast world in which we live!
[00:04] Alvin
It is rampant with monsters
that threaten human life.
[00:10] Alvin
This threat is opposed by
countless adventurers! Heroes!
[00:17] Alvin
Every day, they face these
dangerous battles...
[00:21] Alvin
To protect the people! To protect the world!
[00:27] Alvin
And I, Alvin, am one of them!
[00:32] alvin
Now in a party with Carla, the healer,
[00:35] alvin
my journey continues!
SIGN Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN Don't Hurt Me,
SIGN My Healer!
SIGN "Forced to travel with Carla, a healer..."
[02:20] Alvin
I'm pretty sure this is the right way...
[02:23] Carla
Where exactly are we going,
and what are we doing, Alvin-san?
[02:29] Alvin
We're gathering antidote herbs.
[02:31] Alvin
It's a quest I received from
the Adventurers Guild.
[02:33] Alvin
My fight with the Mostly Bear kept me
from reaching my destination yesterday.
[02:46] Carla
Gathering antidote herbs?
[02:48] Carla
That's a quest for beginners, isn't it?
[02:50] Carla
That should be just the right level of difficulty
for a rookie adventurer like you, Alvin-san.
[02:56] Alvin
Aren't you a healer?
[02:58] Alvin
Shouldn't the things you say
make people feel better?
[03:00] Alvin
Freaking hell.
[03:01] Alvin
If not for that stupid curse,
I'd have ditched her ages ago!
[03:05] Carla
Alvin-san.
[03:07] Carla
Are you certain that this is the right way?
[03:12] Alvin
Yeah, it should be right down this road.
[03:14] Carla
Does that mean we'll have
to pass through there?
[03:55] Carla
Alvin-san, to your right!
[03:58] Carla
Now, to the north-northwest!
[04:00] Carla
Not that way!
Twenty degrees right diagonal!
[04:03] Carla
Now! At eight o'clock
plus fifty-two minutes!
[04:08] Carla
Next, the ox-tiger direction!
[04:11] Carla
What's wrong?
Are you hard of hearing?
[04:14] Carla
Hey!
[04:15] Alvin
Your instructions are impossible to f—
[04:19] Alvin
Are you having a picnic?!
[04:23] Alvin
What's wrong with you?
[04:25] Alvin
How can you be drinking
tea while I'm fighting?
[04:29] Alvin
Say something!
[04:30] Carla
I'm just taking a little break.
[04:32] Alvin
You've got a whole brunch setup on here!
[04:35] Carla
You don't have to be so mad...
[04:37] Carla
I made enough sandwiches
for you, too, Alvin-san.
[04:39] Alvin
That's not what I'm mad about!
[04:41] Carla
And I ate them!
[04:42] Alvin
Now that I'm mad about!
[04:46] Alvin
We can't move on until we
beat these guys, remember?
[04:51] GhostA
Feels a little chilly today, huh?
[04:53] GhostB
Must be a ghost thing, huh?
[04:56] Alvin
But I'm stuck here fighting all on my own...
[04:59] Alvin
Couldn't you help me out a little?
[05:03] Alvin
What's with that expression?
[05:05] Carla
You're aware that physical attacks
don't work on ghosts, right?
[05:10] Carla
You need silver weapons or magic.
[05:15] Alvin
Is that true?
[05:17] Carla
Oh, I'm so sorry!
[05:20] Alvin
Hey, where's this coming from?!
[05:22] Carla
I knew you were a beginner, and yet...
[05:26] Carla
If only I'd told you that in advance,
[05:29] Carla
you wouldn't have been forced to
humiliate yourself like this!
[05:31] Ghost
How embarrassing.
[05:33] Alvin
I... I didn't humiliate myself!
[05:35] Alvin
Everyone makes a mistake
or two in their life!
[05:38] Alvin
And besides, this is my
first time fighting ghosts!
[05:42] Carla
Hey, calm down already.
[05:44] Alvin
Calm down?! You little...
[05:47] Carla
That way you were dancing...
[05:52] Carla
I mean, the way you were fighting
earlier looked really cool!
[05:55] Carla
With moves like that,
you could get into the circus!
[05:57] Alvin
What am I, a clown to you?!
[05:59] Carla
You should take it as a compliment!
[06:00] Carla
They make laughingstocks out of themselves
just to give other people a good time!
[06:05] Alvin
I wasn't trying to give
other people a good time!
[06:07] Alvin
Sheesh. Like she knows so
much about everything...
[06:10] Alvin
If you're going to lecture me,
you could at least try to contribute!
[06:13] Carla
Excuse me? Have you forgotten my class?
[06:17] Alvin
Stress-maker?
[06:19] Carla
Harrumph!
[06:20] Carla
At least call me a stress goddess!
[06:23] Alvin
You see what I mean?
[06:25] Carla
It's quite obvious that I am a healer.
[06:28] Carla
In other words, a holy woman!
[06:29] Alvin
Big doubts there!
[06:30] Carla
I exist to bring comfort to lost souls.
[06:33] Alvin
What? So you'll unleash a
light spell or something?
[06:37] Carla
Hopeless child. So quick to
solve everything with violence!
[06:41] Carla
It's so sad!
[06:42] Alvin
"Sad" certainly describes how I'm feeling...
[06:44] Carla
Sad!
[06:46] Alvin
Seriously, drop it.
[06:48] Carla
Ghosts are fated to wander this
world due to unfinished business.
[06:53] Carla
All we need to do is resolve
whatever's bothering them.
[06:56] GhostC
I see!
[06:58] Alvin
And you think you can do that?
[07:00] Carla
I think if I just hear out their stories,
[07:02] Carla
and say things like "poor thing!" and
"that's pretty rough!" they'll pass on.
[07:08] Carla
Easy-peasy.
[07:09] Alvin
What is this, a girls' night out?
[07:10] Carla
We'll start with you.
[07:12] GhostD
What, me?
[07:14] Carla
Do you have any regrets in life?
[07:16] GhostD
Y-Yes...
[07:18] GhostD
I was twenty years old when I died.
[07:21] GhostD
It happened just two weeks after
getting my first girlfriend!
[07:25] Carla
Poor thing! That's pretty rough!
[07:28] Carla
Super-bad times!
[07:29] Alvin
Don't mock the dead, you holy fraud!
[07:32] Alvin
And did you actually say "super-bad times"?
[07:34] Carla
Incidentally, Alvin-san is thirty years old,
[07:37] Carla
and he says he's never dated a woman.
[07:39] Alvin
She mocks the living, too.
[07:43] GhostD
Thank you. I guess I was a lucky man!
[07:48] Alvin
And now the dead are mocking me.
[07:50] GhostE
Excuse me.
[07:51] Carla
Yes?
[07:52] GhostE
I used to be a warrior.
[07:55] GhostE
But I was killed by a golem!
It's so frustrating!
[07:59] Carla
Alvin-san, can you defeat a golem?
[08:02] Alvin
Well, I was hoping to face
one sooner or later.
[08:05] Alvin
But right now, five slimes
is about the best I can do.
[08:11] GhostE
Five slimes?!
[08:13] GhostE
Scrub! I'm ded! Trollolol!
[08:16] Alvin
I thought so!
[08:17] Carla
Incredible!
[08:19] Carla
We're sending them all to their final rest!
[08:22] Carla
And laughing as they go!
[08:23] Alvin
He was laughing at me!
[08:25] Carla
You might have a future in this, Alvin-san!
[08:28] Alvin
A future? What kind?
[08:30] Carla
It takes an exceptional person
to help a ghost rest in peace!
[08:33] Carla
I think you really have what it takes!
[08:36] Carla
Are you light-element affiliated?
[08:38] Carla
O Warrior of Light!
[08:40] Carla
O Holy Knight!
[08:41] Alvin
Hey, lay off...
[08:43] Carla
O Circus Performer?
[08:44] Alvin
I'm not a clown!
[08:49] Alvin
Well, we made it through the graveyard,
[08:53] Alvin
but now I'm exhausted.
[08:54] Carla
We could have stayed there longer and helped
all the ghosts find their final rest.
SIGN Alvin, Warrior of Light,
offers free passage
to the next life!!
[09:06] Alvin
Don't be stupid!
[09:07] Alvin
I'm a warrior, start to finish!
[09:09] Alvin
I'm not about to change classes!
[09:11] Carla
I feel like it's a waste of your
talent, but if you insist.
[09:14] Carla
It's a common saying: "A person's ambitions
don't always match their talents."
[09:19] Alvin
Imagine I said the exact same thing to you.
[09:22] Alvin
Now, let's go.
[09:24] Alvin
We still haven't finished our quest!
[09:30] Carla
Alvin-san?
[09:33] Carla
Alvin-san?
[09:35] Alvin
People tend to think of gathering
antidote herbs as an easy quest,
[09:40] Alvin
but there are many things
you need to watch out for.
[09:42] Alvin
This forest, in particular,
is rife with goblins!
[09:46] Alvin
They're not strong, but they're tricky!
[09:49] Alvin
If you're not careful,
you'll end up in a goblin trap!
[09:55] Alvin
Like I just did.
[10:11] Carla
Are you all right?!
[10:13] Alvin
Is that how you check on someone?
[10:16] Carla
Thank goodness! I was so worried!
[10:19] Alvin
You seem pretty relaxed to me!
[10:21] Carla
How are you feeling?
[10:23] Alvin
I feel extremely ashamed.
[10:25] Carla
One of those, "I'd like to crawl into a
hole and never come out" feelings, right?
[10:30] Carla
Well, I guess you succeeded there!
[10:33] Alvin
Could you please be quiet?
[10:35] Carla
Can you get out?
[10:37] Alvin
I'll try.
[10:40] Alvin
This won't be easy.
[10:42] Alvin
The ground breaks apart too easily.
[10:44] Alvin
There wouldn't happen to be something
like a rope around, would there?
[10:47] Carla
Something like a rope?
[10:49] Carla
You mean like intestines?
[10:50] Alvin
That idea is insane!
[10:51] Alvin
Not even a necromancer would
come up with "intestines"
[10:55] Alvin
when asked for something like a rope!
[10:57] Carla
But you can't expect a rope
to just fall into my lap.
[11:01] Alvin
And you think intestines would?!
[11:04] Alvin
A vine from the trees would be just as good!
[11:05] Alvin
Could you please just hurry?
[11:07] Alvin
If a monster shows up now,
I'm a sitting duck!
[11:10] Carla
Very well!
[11:12] Carla
I'll go searching.
[11:13] Alvin
Hey! Don't go too far!
[11:16] Alvin
Remember, I'll die if we
get 300 meters apart!
[11:20] Carla
Were you waiting long?
[11:22] Alvin
Not long at all, actually!
[11:24] Carla
That exchange just now...
[11:27] Carla
It sounded like a couple
meeting up for a date.
[11:29] Carla
Unpleasant.
[11:30] Alvin
What in the world...
[11:31] Alvin
And did you even look?
[11:34] Carla
I'm sorry.
[11:36] Carla
I didn't see anything that
looked like intestines.
[11:38] Alvin
That sounds like a good thing.
[11:40] Carla
But I did run into a person,
so I called them here.
[11:43] Carla
Right over here!
[11:44] Alvin
A person? In this forest?
[11:47] Carla
He's the one who dug the hole!
[11:49] Alvin
That's a freaking goblin!
[11:51] Carla
What, is that bad?
[11:53] Alvin
Yes, it's very bad!
[11:54] Alvin
Why did you call a monster here?!
[11:56] Carla
Are you really in a position
to be choosy right now?
[12:00] Alvin
You bet your ass I am!
[12:01] Alvin
When he looks at me, he sees—
[12:04] Alvin
Wait...
[12:06] Alvin
Why's he crying?
[12:09] Carla
What's wrong, Gobkichi-san?
[12:11] Alvin
You're already introduced?
[12:12] Carla
Why are you crying?
[12:14] Carla
I think Alvin-san is the one
who should be crying!
[12:17] Carla
I mean, look at the situation he's in!
[12:18] Alvin
No kidding!
[12:20] Gobkichi
I dug that hole to catch wild boars...
[12:27] Carla
Gobkichi-san...
[12:28] Gobkichi
And now... this...
[12:30] Gobkichi
I'm so pathetic!
[12:33] Carla
Apologize!
[12:35] Alvin
Me?!
[12:49] Carla
We're almost at the place where
the antidote herbs grow, right?
[12:53] Alvin
Hush!
[12:54] Alvin
This isn't good...
[12:56] Alvin
It's a cyclops!
[12:57] Alvin
We've got to get out of
here before he sees us!
[13:01] Carla
Wait a minute!
[13:02] Carla
Are you sure that's what you want to do?
[13:05] Carla
A person can't mature if they avoid
anything that might challenge them.
[13:09] Carla
Over time, such people...
[13:12] Carla
turn out just like you, Alvin-san!
[13:14] Alvin
I'm already like me!
[13:16] Carla
That's why we should beat him ourselves!
[13:18] Carla
Yeah!
[13:19] Alvin
Don't say "yeah!"
[13:22] Alvin
I just said that five slimes was my limit!
[13:26] Alvin
So... do you have a plan
to beat him or something?
[13:29] Carla
I have the ultimate, secret plan known as me!
[13:33] Carla
Isn't that nice?
[13:34] Alvin
Please keep it a secret forever!
[13:36] Alvin
So, what were you intending to do?
[13:39] Carla
Tut, tut!
[13:40] Carla
Alvin-san. Remember, I'm a healer!
SIGN Ta-da
[13:44] Carla
So I'll use summoning magic!
[13:46] Alvin
Do healers do that?
[13:48] Carla
All the hip, young healers
are into summoning magic!
[13:52] Alvin
I wish they were into common sense!
[13:55] Alvin
So? What exactly do you intend to summon?
[13:58] Carla
Would you like to see what they look like?
[14:00] Carla
For the lowest level summoned beast,
I don't even need a ritual.
[14:05] Alvin
For real? Sure, show me!
[14:07] Alvin
I kind of want to see it!
[14:09] Carla
Very well.
[14:15] Alvin
Put it back!
[14:16] Alvin
What are you?! A servant of the devil?!
[14:19] Carla
What do you expect?
[14:20] Carla
It's the lowest level kind, after all.
[14:24] Carla
With a proper ritual,
[14:26] Carla
I can call a proper summoned beast.
[14:28] Carla
Although it will take some time...
[14:31] Alvin
Now that you mention it,
[14:33] Alvin
shouldn't you start summoning right now,
[14:35] Alvin
before the Cyclops notices us?
[14:37] Carla
I can't do that. No way!
[14:40] Alvin
Why not?!
[14:41] Carla
It doesn't feel dramatic enough.
[14:44] Alvin
It doesn't need to be entertaining!
[14:46] Carla
By the way, you've been making a
lot of noise for a while now...
[14:50] Alvin
Why do you think that is?!
[14:52] Carla
...so he's already noticed us.
[15:04] Alvin
We're... We're not actually ready.
[15:06] Cyclops
Oh, okay. I'll wait.
[15:08] Alvin
Why's he so damn nice?!
[15:09] Alvin
He said he'll wait!
[15:11] Carla
No need for that.
[15:13] Carla
I've already prepared for the summoning.
[15:15] Alvin
What is that?!
[15:16] Carla
I'll launch this into the air...
[15:19] Carla
and it will travel through dimensions,
and reach the summoned beast!
[15:22] Carla
Then the summoned beast will
come running to our aid!
[15:24] Carla
It's my brilliantly unique summoning method!
[15:28] Carla
Go!
[15:37] Alvin
Hey, it's coming back.
[15:43] Carla
It's from my summoned beast.
[15:45] Carla
"I've been asked to babysit
the neighborhood kids,
[15:47] Carla
so I can't come."
[15:48] Alvin
How very considerate!
[15:50] Cyclops
So?
[15:52] Cyclops
You need something from these rocks?
[15:54] Alvin
Well... actually... that is...
[16:00] Cyclops
So, you're trying to gather antidote herbs?
[16:03] Cyclops
You could've just said so earlier!
[16:06] Alvin
Well, thanks for showing us the way...
[16:08] Cyclops
Well, these rocks are my turf,
[16:12] Cyclops
so I know the way better than you.
[16:15] Carla
And the antidote herbs are this way?
[16:17] Cyclops
Yeah, they're right here.
[16:24] Cyclops
Take as many as you like!
[16:26] Cyclops
Use them to help someone suffering
the ravages of poison!
[16:30] Cyclops
Later!
[16:32] Alvin
Thanks again!
[16:33] Carla
Thank you so much!
[16:36] Alvin
What a nice guy!
[16:38] Carla
I'm glad I didn't call that summoned beast.
[16:41] Carla
My intuition was right on the money!
[16:43] Alvin
You just got lucky!
[16:44] Alvin
And I'm feeling pretty good right now,
so could you please not ruin it?
[16:54] Alvin
I'm glad we got lots of herbs,
but the sun's down already...
[16:58] Alvin
We'll have to camp out tonight.
[17:00] Carla
I suppose...
[17:02] Alvin
Boy, I'm exhausted.
[17:03] Alvin
I'm as exhausted as a man can be!
[17:07] Alvin
Since forming a party with Carla,
[17:09] Alvin
I've felt forms of exhaustion
I never knew before.
[17:12] Alvin
Being in a party is way
harder than I expected.
[17:15] Alvin
I figured partying up with a healer
would make everything easier...
[17:19] Alvin
That said... is she even really a healer?
[17:24] Alvin
She pulled out that creepy
summoned beast earlier today...
[17:27] Alvin
Does she even know any proper spells?
[17:29] Alvin
I don't think Mostly Bear-san would lie,
[17:33] Alvin
so I assume she really did heal me,
[17:36] Alvin
but she was also wearing
that weird outfit...
[17:39] Alvin
Maybe the reason I'm really
getting so tired so often
[17:42] Alvin
is because she's an evil witch
draining my life force?
[17:47] Alvin
Maybe, while I still can...
[17:49] Alvin
No, no!
[17:49] Alvin
Remember, you'll die if you
get 300 meters away from her!
[17:52] Alvin
I can't even run away!
[17:55] Alvin
Well, it's true that other than the curse
and the mental stress she's caused,
[17:59] Alvin
she hasn't done me any harm...
[18:01] Alvin
I guess I should just wait
and see a little longer.
[18:04] Alvin
Look at her, not even caring how I feel!
[18:08] Alvin
What's with all the fidgeting, anyway?
[18:12] Carla
Well... at times like these... you know...
[18:17] Carla
We're supposed to talk
about who we like, right?!
[18:19] Alvin
It's not a dang sleepover!
[18:21] Carla
What, it isn't?!
[18:23] Alvin
Camping isn't some game!
[18:25] Alvin
Dangerous monsters come out at night!
[18:27] Alvin
We have to take turns standing watch,
[18:29] Alvin
keep our wits about us, and...
[18:32] Alvin
What are you laughing about?
[18:35] Carla
Oh... I'm sorry.
[18:37] Carla
I just found it extremely funny
to receive a high-handed lecture
[18:39] Carla
from a person so green
that he fell into a hole.
[18:42] Alvin
I really wish you could
work on that phrasing!
[18:45] Alvin
Still, you're acting a little goofy now.
[18:48] Alvin
Are you enjoying yourself?
[18:50] Carla
I wouldn't say that.
[18:52] Carla
But this is my first time camping out.
[18:57] Carla
So I suppose it feels rather
like a new experience,
[19:00] Carla
and I feel kind of like a real adventurer...
[19:03] Carla
And I guess it is fun.
[19:08] Carla
What about you, Alvin-san?
[19:10] Alvin
I've camped out several times.
[19:14] Alvin
But I guess it is... my first time
doing it with a real companion.
[19:20] Carla
Alvin-san...
[19:23] Carla
You don't have any friends?
[19:25] Alvin
You don't, either!
[19:28] Alvin
Here we go.
[19:29] Alvin
Time for bed.
[19:30] Carla
It seems a bit early for that.
[19:31] Carla
Are you an old man?
[19:33] Alvin
It's talking with you that
makes me feel tired!
[19:38] Alvin
You seem pretty wide awake,
so I'll rest first.
[19:41] Carla
I don't mind, of course.
[19:43] Carla
Falling into that hole must have
been very mentally taxing.
[19:46] Alvin
The only thing taxing here is you!
[19:51] Alvin
Anyway, wake me up in three hours.
[19:54] Carla
Understood.
[19:55] Carla
In the meantime, I'll...
[19:57] Alvin
Stand watch, right?
[19:59] Carla
...sing a song.
[20:00] Alvin
Why?
[20:03] Carla
What a strange question!
[20:05] Alvin
If you wanna talk "strange," let's
talk about how your mind works!
[20:07] Alvin
Did your brain short out or something?!
[20:09] Carla
Well, I was going to sing a lullaby.
[20:11] Carla
Here I go...
[20:13] Carla
Despite what you might think,
I really do love singing.
[20:15] Alvin
I wish you'd love silence.
[20:18] Carla
And they say my singing voice
draws birds out of the skies!
[20:23] Alvin
With what, the shock waves?
[20:25] Alvin
And you still suck at winking.
[20:26] Carla
Please, just trust me and listen!
[20:30] Alvin
Well... I might as well give you a chance.
[20:37] Carla
Neeryooom! Chugga-chugga-chugga-chug!
[20:39] Alvin
Okay, stop!
[20:41] Carla
But that was just the intro!
[20:43] Alvin
What kind of lullaby has an intro?!
[20:45] Alvin
And what kind of lullaby goes that hard?!
[20:49] Carla
I'll try a more peaceful one, then.
[20:51] Alvin
That should've been your first go-to!
[20:54] Carla
I'll begin, then.
[20:55] Carla
Go to sleep... Go to sleep...
[21:00] Carla
Listen to my calming song... and sleep...
[21:08] Alvin
She's not bad.
[21:09] Carla
Then fall into the abyss of endless fear,
[21:13] Carla
be tormented by nightmares, never waking,
[21:17] Carla
as you writhe in agony...
[21:19] Alvin
Is this a curse?!
[21:20] Carla
How rude!
[21:21] Carla
That song was guaranteed
to put you in a slumber!
[21:23] Alvin
An eternal slumber, maybe!
[21:25] Alvin
I've been wondering since we met,
[21:27] Alvin
but are you really even a healer?!
[21:34] Alvin
Crap! I yelled too loud
and summoned a monster!
[21:39] Beast
Could you people shut up?!
[21:41] Beast
Don't you know what time it is?!
[21:43] Alvin
He's yelling at us!
[21:45] Beast
Get to sleep already!
[21:47] Alvin
Yes, sir!
SIGN Next Time
[23:25] Carla
Next episode's title is
[23:27] Carla
"Despite the terrible time he's been having
during his travels with Carla the healer
[23:32] Carla
for two episodes Alvin tries to keep up
his job as a monster-hunting adventurer
SIGN See you then!
[23:37] sign
"Despite the terrible time he's been having during his travels with Carla
the healer for two episodes Alvin tries to keep up his job as a
monster-hunting adventurer which I guess shows some pretty impressive
resolve except when he runs into a mushroom monster he challenges
to a fight and it turns out to be tougher than expected and by the way
this won't get mentioned in the series proper but his species is called
matango and you might think it has an adult male voice but also
given how it was drawn in the manga a childish voice might
work too, and it's just one big surprise after another, but the truth is
we actually wrote this title in early 2021 before we cast the voice actor,
so I'm actually looking forward to who's voicing it but anyway there's
more going on than the question of whether Alvin can beat the
mushroom and that's the deal with episode 3."
[23:37] Carla
which I guess shows some
pretty impressive resolve..."
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