4 - Lower Body Lasers | Pots and Kettles | Illegal Occupation | Butt Play

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    
SIGN    Lower Body Lasers
[01:33] (Flashback) Hanako
    Hey, Maeda, what's this?
[01:35] (Flashback) Maeda
    This is a back scratcher.
[01:38] (Flashback) Hanako
    How do you use it?
[01:39] (Flashback) Maeda
    Like this.
[01:43] (Flashback) Hanako
    That's amazing.
[01:45] (Flashback) Hanako
    You know everything, Maeda.
[01:47] Maeda
    I must teach Hanako
    anything she asks to know.
[01:52] Maeda
    I can't ever say "I don't know" to her.
[01:56] Maeda
    Thus, even that one time...
[01:57] (Flashback) Hanako
    Hey, Maeda...
[01:59] (Flashback) Maeda
    What is it, Hanako-sama?
[02:00] (Flashback) Hanako
    What's shogi?
[02:04] Maeda
    "Shogi is a game where one moves their
    pieces until they capture the enemy King."
[02:09] Maeda
    I suppose I could just tell her that...
[02:12] Maeda
    But I cannot.
[02:13] Maeda
    For if I did...
[02:15] Hanako
    "Teach me that game, then."
[02:18] Maeda
    ...she would say.
[02:20] Maeda
    Alas, I don't know the rules of shogi.
[02:27] Maeda
    So...
[02:28] (Flashback) Hanako
    Hey, what's shogi?
[02:30] (Flashback) Maeda
    A sport wherein one fires
    laser beams from their butt.
[02:33] (Flashback) Hanako
    Show me.
[02:34] (Flashback) Maeda
    Yes, ma'am.
[02:37] (Flashback) Mom
    Oh my God, Maeda-san, what the hell?!
[02:41] Maeda
    Since then, Hanako-sama
    would often beg of me...
[02:46] (Flashback) Hanako
    Hey, hey, Maeda, do shogi!
[02:48] (Flashback) Hanako
    I can't sleep until you fire
    a laser from your butt.
[02:53] (Flashback) Hanako
    Maeda, show me your beam!
[02:56] Maeda
    But since a week ago, Hanako-sama's
    tone has suddenly changed.
[03:03] Hanako
    You can stop with the beam now.
[03:05] Hanako
    What's the deal with your butthole?
[03:08] Hanako
    I'll pay for your surgery.
[03:10] Hanako
    Have them remove it for you.
[03:12] Maeda
    Hanako-sama...
[03:13] Maeda
    You were so delighted by my butt
    beam until just a week ago.
[03:17] Brother
    I'm seriously worried about
    my sister's mental health,
[03:20] Brother
    being delighted by that
    until just a week ago.
[03:23] Maeda
    Welcome home, Kentarou-sama.
[03:26] Maeda
    Say, has Hanako-sama taken an umbrella?
[03:29] Brother
    Dunno.
[03:30] Brother
    The weather forecast said it
    would be sunny, so probably not.
[03:35] Maeda
    As I do not have a license,
    I shall go fetch her on foot.
[03:39] Brother
    This guy's been at our place forever...
[03:41] Brother
    But what does he do exactly?
[03:46] Olivia
    I didn't bring an umbrella.
[03:48] Olivia
    What about you guys?
[03:49] Kasumi
    I always keep a foldable umbrella with me.
[03:52] Kasumi
    What about you, Hanako?
[03:53] Hanako
    I forgot.
[03:54] Olivia
    What do we do?
[03:57] Hanako
    Want to wear garbage bags?
[04:00] Olivia
    Why are Hanako's ideas always so hobotastic
    when she's apparently so rich?
[04:05] Kasumi
    M-Maybe we can fit three
    people under my umbrella.
[04:09] Hanako
    Not under a foldable umbrella, I don't think.
[04:13] Olivia
    I wonder if someone could
    lend us an umbrella.
[04:15] Maeda
    Hanako-sama.
[04:18] Kasumi
    Hanako-san!
[04:19] Kasumi
    Stab him with this!
[04:20] Kasumi
    Hurry!
[04:21] Kasumi
    Kill him quick!
[04:22] Hanako
    Kasumi-san, calm down!
[04:26] Hanako
    H-He works for us at home.
[04:29] Hanako
    He's... a thing.
[04:29] Maeda
    I'm Maeda.
[04:30] Kasumi
    What do you mean, "a thing"?
[04:32] Maeda
    Hanako-sama, I've brought you an umbrella.
[04:34] Hanako
    Thanks.
[04:37] Hanako
    Kasumi-san, are you okay?
[04:39] Kasumi
    I'm sorry, I'm sorry!
[04:41] Kasumi
    I have a fear of men.
[04:44] Hanako
    Is this better?
[04:46] Kasumi
    I'm sorry. I'm sorry,.
    I can't deal with weirdos either.
[04:49] Narrator
    And then what happened?
[04:50] Maeda
    Are these ladies your school friends?
[04:53] Hanako
    Yeah. Olivia and Kasumi.
[04:55] Maeda
    Olivia.
[04:56] Maeda
    That's a foreign name.
[04:58] Maeda
    I enjoy traveling abroad.
[05:02] Maeda
    Which country are you from?
[05:06] Olivia
    I-It's a secret.
[05:12] Maeda
    I feel like your friends are afraid
    of me because of you, Hanako-sama!
[05:15] Hanako
    It's because you just happen to look skeevy!
[05:20] Olivia
    Thanks for the umbrella.
[05:22] Hanako
    Sure.
[05:22] Kasumi
    You tolerate having that thing
    in your life, Hanako-san?
[05:27] Olivia
    That "thing"?
[05:27] Kasumi
    I never knew you hated men so much.
[05:31] Kasumi
    I-I mean...
[05:32] Kasumi
    I heard men fire laser beam things from
    their crotch when they're turned on.
[05:37] Hanako
    Didn't you know, Kasumi-san?
[05:39] Hanako
    Laser beams come out of the butt.
[05:40] Kasumi
    Really?
[05:42] Kasumi
    I never knew.
[05:43] Kasumi
    Oh jeez, I'm embarrassed.
[05:45] Hanako
    And it destroys the roof
    sometimes. It's so dangerous.
[05:49] Sensei
    Sorry I'm late, everyone.
[05:51] Sensei
    Who are you?!
SIGN    Asobi Asobase
SIGN    Pots and Kettles
[05:58] Person A
    Chisato, long time no see!
[06:01] Sensei
    Yeah, long time.
[06:03] Person B
    It's been about six years, hasn't it?
[06:05] Person A
    You haven't changed one bit.
[06:06] Sensei
    R-Really?
[06:07] Person B
    Yeah.
[06:08] Person B
    You're just like you were back in college.
[06:10] Sensei
    I wonder how the others are doing.
[06:13] Person A
    I think three-fifths of
    them have gotten married.
[06:17] Sensei
    R-Really?
[06:22] Person A
    What a long sigh.
[06:24] Person B
    You work at a girls'
    school, right, Chisa-chan?
[06:26] Person B
    Do you ever meet anyone?
[06:27] Sensei
    With men?
[06:28] Sensei
    Nah, not at all.
[06:30] Sensei
    Oh, I'm a supervisor for
    a club at school, though.
[06:33] Person A
    That sounds really teachery.
[06:35] Person A
    What kind of club?
[06:36] Person A
    Basketball? Volleyball?
[06:36] Person A
    I bet concert band or
    choir would suit you, too.
[06:39] Sensei
    It's a club called the Pastimers Club.
[06:43] Person A
    Huh.
[06:44] Person A
    Wow.
[06:45] Person B
    I've been working at a girls' school
    for the past three years, too.
[06:48] Sensei
    Really?
[06:49] Sensei
    Where?
[06:50] Person B
    Have you heard of Sei Shukujo Academy?
[06:52] Sensei
    I have.
[06:54] Sensei
    It's that school with all
    well-to-do girls, right?
[06:56] Person B
    One of the Four Lords of
    Pastimers is at my school.
[07:00] Person B
    I'll hook you up sometime.
[07:02] ---
    Okay.
[07:15] Sensei
    What's a Lord of Pastimers?
SIGN    Pastimers Club
[07:22] Sensei
    Guys, sorry I'm late.
[07:24] Sensei
    What're you up to?
[07:26] Hanako
    Playing Old Maid.
[07:26] Sensei
    Huh.
[07:29] Sensei
    Hey, girls...
[07:31] Sensei
    Have you heard of the
    Four Lords of Pastimers?
[07:37] Hanako
    What's that?
[07:39] Sensei
    You wouldn't, would you?
[07:41] Sensei
    Okay.
[07:42] Sensei
    See, one of my friends also
    works at a girls' school.
[07:47] Sensei
    We met to catch up the other day,
[07:48] Sensei
    and she told me that one of the Four
    Lords of Pastimers is a student there.
[07:52] Kasumi
    Sensei has some weird friends.
[07:56] Hanako
    What's a Lord of Pastimers?
[07:58] Olivia
    I bet they're stupid.
[07:59] Kasumi
    Hey!
[08:00] Olivia
    I bet they only exist in that person's brain.
[08:03] Hanako
    Maybe she's, like, twice the
    age of an eighth grader,
[08:07] Hanako
    and now she's thinking like one again.
[08:10] Sensei
    They're really roasting her.
[08:12] Kasumi
    Maybe there are some requirements, like
    winning in a national kendama tournament.
[08:16] Hanako
    There's a lot of different pastimes, though.
[08:18] Olivia
    Can you become one of the Four
    Lords just playing kendama?
[08:21] Kasumi
    I guess kendama alone wouldn't be enough.
[08:23] Hanako
    How accomplished do you have to be, then?
[08:25] Kasumi
    I wonder... I can't say.
[08:27] Sensei
    It sounds like a proper club meeting.
[08:31] Sensei
    Hello?
[08:32] Person A
    Chisato? Are you at school?
[08:33] Sensei
    Yeah, at the club.
[08:35] Person A
    You know that Lord of Pastimers
    I was talking about?
[08:39] Sensei
    Yeah?
[08:39] Person A
    She just headed out your way.
[08:42] Person A
    She should be there soon.
[08:43] Sensei
    Huh, okay.
[08:45] Sensei
    Got it.
[08:46] Sensei
    Thanks.
[08:49] Sensei
    The Lord is coming.
[08:51] Kasumi
    That's what you were talking about just now?!
[08:53] Sensei
    Huh?
[08:54] Sensei
    Yeah.
[08:55] Olivia
    Which school, by the way?
[08:56] Sensei
    Sei Shukujo Academy.
[08:59] Hanako
    That super well-to-do school?
[09:00] Olivia
    One of the Lords might
    actually be there, then.
[09:02] Kasumi
    I know, right?
[09:03] Kasumi
    I bet she's super proper, too.
[09:04] Kasumi
    Wow, you all believe me as
    soon as I bring that up?
[09:06] Kasumi
    You're such slaves to status.
[09:17] Kasumi
    H-Holy crap.
[09:20] Hanako
    Uh... Don't you get in trouble
    at school, looking like that?
[09:24] Lord
    It's my actual hair color.
[09:26] Lord
    This butterfly landed on
    me and became my friend.
[09:28] Kasumi
    She's lying!
[09:29] Olivia
    Wh-What about your makeup?
[09:31] Lord
    I'm not wearing any.
[09:32] Kasumi
    That's a lie, too!
[09:33] Kasumi
    B-But you wear your uniform properly, huh?
[09:36] Lord
    Huh?
[09:37] Lord
    I don't get it. Who doesn't
    follow the school dress code?
[09:40] Kasumi
    Why is that the one thing
    you're obedient about?
[09:42] Sensei
    Hey, I'm Ando-sensei's friend.
[09:45] Lord
    Oh, yeah, Ando-chan.
[09:47] Lord
    I didn't feel like coming, but
    she knows my secret, so I had to.
[09:49] Sensei
    I heard you're one of the
    Four Lords of Pastimers.
[09:53] Lord
    Oh, that.
[09:55] Lord
    I, like, slept with almost all the
    guys from the boys' school nearby,
[09:58] Lord
    and now that's what they call me.
[10:00] Kasumi
    Wait, you mean Lord of Pleasure Seeking*?!
[10:03] Olivia
    H-How's Hanako reacting?
[10:05] Hanako Right
    Awesome! Awesome!
[10:07] Hanako Left
    No! She's a slut!
[10:09] Hanako Left
    Slut, slut, slut!
[10:10] Olivia
    I see two weird creatures above her head.
[10:14] Olivia
    Kasumi's soul is escaping from her mouth.
[10:17] Olivia
    But you can't keep up with school if
    you're always fooling around, can you?
[10:21] Lord
    Studying at home is totally lame.
[10:25] Hanako
    She's a dumbass.
[10:25] Olivia
    Yup, of course she is.
[10:28] Lord
    You can pick up most of it
    just listening in class.
[10:32] Lord
    I made the top 100 in the national
    mock exam the other day, too.
[10:36] Hanako
    I'm going to go nuts with jealousy!
[10:38] Olivia
    C-Can you do kendama?
[10:41] Kasumi
    Olivia-san?!
[10:42] Kasumi
    Aren't you sad trying to gain*
    superiority over kendama?!
[10:50] Lord
    You're just catching the
    ball. This is boring.
[10:53] Olivia
    O-Okay.
[10:54] Hanako
    I-I know...
[10:56] Hanako
    Olivia, Kasumi-san, do that makeup on me!
[11:01] Olivia
    Nah...
[11:01] Kasumi
    I think we should give up.
[11:03] Hanako
    No!
[11:03] Hanako
    Not wearing makeup is tantamount to
    going into battle unarmed and naked!
[11:08] Hanako
    Only by wearing steel armor as she
    does can we engage in fair battle!
[11:13] Olivia
    I-If you insist...
[11:16] Olivia
    All right.
[11:16] Kasumi
    I'll do my best.
[11:19] Olivia
    T-Trust me, we did our best, Hanako.
[11:22] Olivia
    You put on color contacts, too.
[11:23] Kasumi
    W-We've done everything we
    could with our skill level.
[11:27] Hanako
    Like, ohmygawd, girl.
[11:31] Lord
    Wasn't there a Batman villain
    that looks like that?
[11:34] Kasumi
    There was!
[11:37] Hanako
    Do you think you can defeat
    me, Lord of Pleasure Seeking?
[11:42] Hanako
    I can handle her myself,
    Kasumi-san and Olivia-chan.
[11:44] Kasumi
    Stop it!
[11:46] Kasumi
    Now you both look and sound
    like a low-level enemy!
[11:50] Lord
    You can have my cleanser, Hana-chan.
[11:52] Hanako
    Huh?
[11:53] Hanako
    Th-Thanks.
[11:54] Lord
    I'm going now.
[11:55] Hanako
    Okay.
[11:58] Hanako
    She was kind of nice.
[12:00] Kasumi
    Yeah.
[12:01] Olivia
    Yes.
[12:02] Sensei
    Honda-san, be sure to wash your face
    quickly without looking in the mirror.
SIGN    Asobi Asobase
SIGN    Illegal Occupation
SIGN    Choujuu Giga
[12:12] Hanako
    What're you looking at, Olivia?
[12:14] Olivia
    Choujuu Giga.
[12:14] Olivia
    The animal drawings are super cute.
[12:17] Kasumi
    Are you interested in this
    kind of stuff, Olivia-san?
[12:19] Olivia
    Yeah.
[12:19] Olivia
    I love ukiyoe, too.
[12:22] Hanako
    Was Choujuu Giga that one that's said
    to be the oldest manga in Japan?
[12:26] Hanako
    You have classy taste for
    a middle schooler, Olivia.
[12:29] Hanako
    Hey, what do you think they're doing here?
[12:31] Kasumi
    Sumo?
[12:32] Hanako
    I guess?
[12:33] Hanako
    Do you think they're all males?
[12:34] Olivia
    How can you tell they're all male?
[12:37] Hanako
    I mean, only men can do sumo wrestling.
[12:43] Olivia
    But I wanted to become a sumo
    wrestler when I grew up!
[12:47] Hanako
    Really?
[12:48] Kasumi
    You didn't notice from what you saw on TV?
[12:50] Olivia
    I thought they were only
    airing the men's games
[12:52] Olivia
    because they're naked from the waist up.
[12:56] Olivia
    I thought girls sumo wrestle secretly
    in a paradise-like place, half naked.
[13:04] Kasumi
    That's Olivia-san's idea of paradise?
[13:07] Kasumi**
    You might not be able to do it as a job,
    but anyone can sumo wrestle for fun.
[13:11] Olivia
    For fun?
[13:12] Olivia
    You do real sumo wrestling for fun?
[13:14] Kasumi
    You could, but we don't have
    anything to use as loincloths.
[13:19] Hanako
    Arm wrestling, thumb wrestling,
    paper wrestling...
[13:22] Hanako
    There's a lot of games that
    have the word "sumo" in it.
[13:24] Olivia
    I want to do something where you
    use your hands and shout "nokotta!"
[13:27] Hanako
    How about teoshi sumo?
[13:28] Olivia
    What's teoshi sumo?
[13:30] Hanako
    You don't know?
[13:31] Hanako
    Kasumi-san, can you come stand in front?
[13:34] Hanako
    You put your hands together like
    this, and you shove and dodge.
[13:37] Hanako
    The first person to lose their footing loses.
[13:40] Kasumi
    You can only touch your opponent's hands.
[13:43] Olivia
    It sounds so fun,
    like frolicking in paradise.
[13:46] Hanako
    Kasumi-san and I will
    go first, so just watch.
[13:50] Olivia
    Okay.
[14:06] Olivia
    It's just like what she
    described, except it's not.
[14:11] Hanako
    Kasumi-san's good.
[14:13] Kasumi
    Hanako-san, you aren't as good as I thought.
[14:18] Kasumi
    Maybe you don't have balance
    in your upper body.
[14:23] Olivia
    She provoked her.
[14:26] Hanako
    Gatotsu!
[14:28] Kasumi
    She fell for it.
[14:29] Kasumi
    Now I just need to avoid her.
[14:33] Kasumi
    She's still going to shove?
[14:35] Kasumi
    Fine!
[14:37] Hanako
    She's doing her Chinese
    contortionist shit again.
[14:41] Hanako
    Still, I will win!
[14:48] Hanako
    O-Olivia...
[14:50] Hanako
    I'm safe, right?
[14:54] Olivia
    What are these girls doing?
[14:56] Olivia
    S-Safe?
[14:58] Olivia
    I mean, I guess?
[15:00] Hanako
    But I think...
[15:02] ---
    Hey, sorry I'm late...
[15:04] Hanako
    I'm done.
[15:05] Sensei
    Honda-san, don't give up!
[15:08] Hanako
    Huh?
[15:09] Hanako
    Sensei, what are you talking about?
[15:11] Sensei
    You can do it!
[15:12] Sensei
    You can't give up!
[15:15] Sensei
    Do it!
[15:15] Sensei
    You can do it!
[15:16] Sensei
    You can keep going!
[15:18] Sensei
    Hang in there, Honda-san!
[15:24] Hanako
    It's in my ey—
[15:30] Sensei
    Th-This is bad.
[15:33] Olivia
    S-Sensei, were you rooting for Hanako?
[15:37] Sensei
    Huh? Not really.
[15:39] Sensei
    I just wanted to sound
    like an intense teacher.
[15:42] Hanako
    Huh? Say what?
[15:43] Hanako
    You scared me!
[15:44] Kasumi
    Okay, Olivia-san, want to
    try playing in paradise?
SIGN    Asobi Asobase
SIGN    Butt Play
[15:59] Kasumi
    No one's here.
[16:08] Kasumi
    No one's here, which means I can secretly...
[16:11] Harry
    I'm going to put my magic on you.
[16:15] Other guy
    Put it on me.
SIGN    Thwack
[16:22] Hanako
    Huh, you're already here, Kasumi-san?
[16:24] Hanako
    Hey, were you writing something?
[16:26] Hanako
    What were you up to?
[16:27] Kasumi
    Um...
[16:32] Kasumi
    Doing a lecture write-up.
[16:34] Hanako
    Sounds busy.
[16:36] Hanako
    Psyche! Middle schoolers
    don't talk about lectures!
[16:39] Hanako
    Huh?
[16:41] Hanako
    "Put it on me"?
[16:45] Hanako
    Err, Kasumi-san...
[16:46] Kasumi
    N-No!
[16:48] Kasumi
    It's not!
[16:49] Kasumi
    I didn't write this!
[16:51] Kasumi
    I didn't!
[16:52] Hanako
    Okay, sorry. I know.
[16:54] Kasumi
    I want to die!
SIGN    Squeeeeeze
[16:56] Hanako
    It's okay!
[16:57] Hanako
    Seriously, it's fine! Don't die!
[16:58] Hanako
    Live!
[16:59] Hanako
    Live!
[17:00] Hanako
    You are beautiful!
[17:01] Olivia
    I ran into Sensei on the way here.
[17:03] Sensei
    Sorry I'm late.
[17:08] Sensei
    I have no clue how it came to this.
[17:11] Hanako
    U-Um...
[17:14] Hanako
    I can't tell them!
[17:15] Hanako
    Kasumi-san will kill herself!
[17:18] Hanako
    I have to come up with a different reason.
[17:19] Hanako
    Something else...
[17:20] Hanako
    K-Kasumi-san was writing
    an Oscar Wilde-style novel.
[17:25] Kasumi
    Hanako-san!
[17:26] Olivia
    Huh, what's it like?
[17:29] Kasumi
    Sorry, it's pretty wild.
[17:31] Kasumi
    It might shock you.
[17:35] Sensei
    I-Is it the kind of thing they
    might be handing out at Big Sight?
[17:39] Kasumi
    Y-Yes.
[17:41] Kasumi
    A wild, sold-in-person type.
[17:42] Sensei
    Really?
[17:44] Sensei
    Can I read it when you're done?
[17:46] Kasumi
    No!
[17:47] Kasumi
    Someone kill me!
[17:49] Kasumi
    I don't have the courage to kill myself!
[17:50] Hanako
    Kasumi-san!
[17:51] Kasumi
    I'll write a will so it
    looks like a proper suicide!
[17:55] Hanako
    Don't worry, I like Boys
    School Wars and stuff, too.
[17:58] Hanako
    I'm interested in that kind
    of stuff, too, these days.
[18:00] Kasumi
    H-Hanako-san...
[18:02] Hanako
    Like, Takezou x Billy, right?
[18:05] Kasumi
    Wh-Who is that?
[18:07] Olivia
    I have no idea what's going on,
    but you're writing a novel?
[18:11] Kasumi
    Y-Yes.
[18:12] Olivia
    Have you chosen a title yet?
[18:14] Kasumi
    N-No, not yet.
[18:15] Hanako
    Hey, I have a good one.
[18:17] ---
    Huh? What is it?
[18:19] Kasumi
    "Anal Bum Cover."
[18:22] Sensei
    Honda-san!
[18:23] Sensei
    Please don't tarnish my bible!
[18:25] Hanako
    S-Sensei, what are you talking about?
[18:28] Kasumi
    Um...
[18:29] Kasumi
    Can we take this seriously?
[18:31] Hanako
    But I was serious!
[18:32] Hanako
    The protagonist, one day, starts
    firing laser beams from his butt.
[18:36] Kasumi
    You aren't serious at all!
[18:37] Maeda
    You called, Hanako-sama?
[18:40] Kasumi
    Stab him with the eraser!
[18:43] Hanako
    Kasumi-san!
[18:44] Maeda
    I can be of use to
    Kasumi-san's novel writing?
[18:47] Maeda
    I shall gladly submit myself to that purpose.
[18:49] Hanako
    Have you ever submitted yourself to anal?
[18:51] Maeda
    Oh, when you say novel, do
    you mean one of that genre?
[18:54] Maeda
    My apologies, I'm not very
    versed in that field.
[18:58] Maeda
    But for you, Hanako-sama, I shall
    head to Nichome with some vaseline.
[19:01] Hanako
    Oh, it's nothing that serious.
[19:03] Hanako
    It's more of a light fantasy.
[19:06] Maeda
    Fantasy...
[19:08] Maeda
    Something like a goblin x dwarf?
[19:10] Hanako
    What kind of nasty trash is that?!
[19:10] Maeda
    Oh, Santa Maria, forgive me Lord...
[19:12] Hanako
    Not that kind of fantasy!
[19:14] Hanako
    You have to have given up on your own
    humanity to read something like that!
[19:17] Maeda
    But my friend's niece is into that
    kind of hardcore doujinshi stuff.
[19:19] Hanako
    Stop! I don't want to hear any more!
[19:21] Maeda
    Gobdwarfs.
[19:22] Hanako
    Please don't abbreviate it
    like you're in the know!
[19:25] Hanako
    Sorry, Kasumi-san.
    That was a weird thing to hear.
[19:30] Hanako
    Come to think of it, I thought
    you had a fear of men.
[19:33] Hanako
    Are you really okay with men on men?
[19:34] Kasumi
    T-Two-D stuff is okay.
[19:37] Kasumi
    2D doesn't come out of the page.
[19:39] Kasumi
    They're totally safe.
[19:41] Kasumi
    Even better if they have
    no interest in women.
[19:44] Hanako
    I-I see.
[19:46] Olivia
    Kasumi, you're going to end up
    like Sensei, talking like that.
[19:53] Kasumi
    Sucks for you. I can totally
    tolerate living like that.
[19:58] Sensei
    My life is one to be tolerated?!
[20:00] Maeda
    Um, I don't know if this would be of any use
    for a BL novel, but may I share a story?
[20:06] Olivia
    Sure.
[20:07] Kasumi
    Thank you.
[20:09] Maeda
    Long long ago, there was a
    sixth-year college student.
[20:14] Maeda
    On the morning of an exam
    which would determine
[20:16] Maeda
    whether or not he'd fail
    the year a third time,
[20:17] Maeda
    he was abducted out of
    the blue by men in black.
[20:22] Maeda
    The men in black restrained the
    student inside a square room,
[20:25] Maeda
    and began probing his butt.
[20:28] Alien
    This is an excellent ass.
[20:31] Alien B
    Let us hide our weapon of
    destruction inside here.
[20:35] Maeda
    When he came to, he was
    back where he was before,
[20:38] Maeda
    but a day had apparently passed, and
    hooray, he failed for a third time.
[20:42] Maeda
    His life soon became a living hell.
[20:48] Maeda
    Every time he took a dump,
    he would destroy the toilet.
[20:52] Maeda
    He would find part-time
    jobs, only to be fired,
[20:54] Maeda
    on grounds of destroying their toilets.
[20:56] Maeda
    One day, when he had resigned himself
    to a fate of homelessness...
[21:01] Man
    What's wrong, buddy?
[21:03] Man
    What happened to you?
[21:04] Maeda
    Get lost, old bastard.
[21:06] Man
    Hold on, let me get a good look.
[21:09] Man
    Why is your ass crack so torn?!
[21:12] Maeda
    Don't touch it!
[21:13] Maeda
    It's dangerous.
[21:14] Maeda
    What if I suddenly fired a beam?
[21:17] Maeda
    I don't know how I ended
    up with this implant.
[21:20] Maeda
    I can't control it myself, either.
[21:23] Maeda
    I can't go back to my old life.
[21:29] Man
    All right, come with me.
[21:31] Man
    I'll teach you how to control your butt.
[21:36] Maeda
    The man who saved me that day...
[21:40] Maeda
    Was Hanako-sama's grandfather.
[21:42] Olivia
    Wait, it's a true story?
[21:44] Olivia
    That's freaky!
[21:45] Sensei
    A-Are you okay now?
[21:47] Maeda
    Yes, thank you.
[21:48] Maeda
    I only destroy the toilet
    when I have diarrhea now.
[21:51] Hanako
    And every time, I have to wait until the
    seat's fixed to use the toilet, damn it!
[21:54] Olivia
    So you're still destroying them!
[21:55] Maeda
    How's that?
[21:56] Maeda
    Does that give you any inspiration?
[21:59] Kasumi
    U-Um...
[22:02] Kasumi
    I feel so sick.
[22:03] Narrator
    And so Nomura Kasumi's distaste
    for men was further exacerbated.