1 - Move Out! Small Fry Platoon!

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:30] Takeru
    This is the worst way to die...
[00:41] Usagi
    Kusanagi!
[00:42] Usagi
    Please answer me!
[00:47] Ikaruga
    I can't see through all the smoke!
[00:49] Ikaruga
    Where are you?
[00:53] Takeru
    And my life was just getting started, too...
[01:08] Lapis
    Congratulations.
SIGN    Episode 1: "Move Out! Small Fry Platoon!"
[01:35] Student A
    Isn't that the sword-nut
    of the small fry platoon?
[01:38] Student B
    Oh, the idiot who charged in with
     nothing but a sword at training recently?
[01:42] Student A
    Get a load of that thing dangling at his hip.
[01:45] Student B
    Japanese swords haven't been relevant
     since long before the Great War.
[01:49] ---
    Is he stupid?
[01:50] Student A
    Of course he's stupid.
[01:54] Takeru
    Shrug it off.
[01:56] Takeru
    Don't get mad at them just
    for mocking your sword.
[02:01] Takeru
    To clear the huge debts my late parents left me,
    and to take care of my beloved little sister,
[02:06] Takeru
    I must become a highly-paid inquisitor.
[02:11] Takeru
    Ancestors, please forgive me
    for letting you down.
SIGN    Freshmen 35th Test Platoon
[02:19] Karuga
    Come in.
[02:21] Usagi
    H-Hey!
[02:21] Usagi
    Wait—
[02:29] Usagi
    N-N-N—
[02:34] Takeru
    Not this again...
[02:37] Usagi
    Wait, why are you crying?
[02:42] Usagi
    What is the meaning of this?!
[02:44] Usagi
    Ordinarily, shouldn't I be the one crying?
[02:48] Takeru
    Uh, well...
[02:49] Usagi
    Did I look that pitiful to you?
[02:52] Usagi
    Was I really that comical?
[02:54] Usagi
    Enough to bring you to tears?
[02:56] Takeru
    No! In fact, you have a great body...
[02:59] Usagi
    Pervert! Pervert! Pervert! Pervert! Pervert!
[03:03] Ikaruga
    I got some nice pictures out of that!
[03:05] Ikaruga
    I never imagined he'd actually cry.
[03:09] Takeru
    Ikaruga! This is your doing again?!
[03:12] Takeru
    How many times have I told you
    not to use Usagi as a plaything—
[03:15] Ikaruga
    Maybe I should throw copies
     of this all over campus.
[03:20] Ikaruga
    "A Bunny Girl And The Boy Who
     Burst Into Tears Upon Seeing Her."
[03:24] Ikaruga
    Even I find the absurdity of it arousing.
[03:28] Usagi
    What?
[03:28] Usagi
    H-Hey, stop that!
[03:31] Ikaruga
    This will fetch a pretty penny.
[03:32] Usagi
    Stop it! Give me that camera!
[03:36] Sougetsu
    Listen.
[03:37] ---
    An inquisitor's job is to capture witches
     and confiscate magic items.
[03:43] Sougetsu
    Our aim is not to kill or destroy.
[03:47] Ouka
    I know that, sir.
[03:50] Ouka
    But killing that witch was the only way
    I could have handled the situation.
[03:54] Sougetsu
    Whatever your reasons,
     you abandoned your duty as inquisitor.
[04:00] Sougetsu
    I hope you're ready to face the consequences.
[04:03] Ouka
    Am I...
[04:05] ---
    fired?
[04:06] Sougetsu
    Disbarred, to be precise.
[04:10] Sougetsu
    You will go back to being a normal
     student at Anti-Magic Academy.
[04:16] Sougetsu
    You will be assigned to...
[04:19] Sougetsu
    The 35th Test Platoon.
[04:21] Sougetsu
    Also known as, "The Small Fry Platoon."
[04:25] Ouka
    Small Fry Platoon?
[04:28] Usagi
    Shouldn't we be coming up
     with a plan of action?
[04:32] Usagi
    It's been half a year since
     we entered high school.
[04:34] ---
    Half a year!
[04:35] Usagi
    Do you know what our current points total is?
[04:39] Takeru
    Z-Zero, I think?
[04:41] Usagi
    Yes, zero! Zero points in half a year!
[04:44] Usagi
    We must think of a way to
    overcome this predicament!
[04:49] Ikaruga
    With Kusanagi as our lone vanguard,
    there's nothing we can do.
[04:54] Takeru
    I'm sorry. I'm ashamed of myself.
[04:56] Usagi
    Don't be so quick to apologize!
[04:59] Usagi
    You're the captain!
[05:01] Usagi
    Please act more like one!
[05:03] Takeru
    That's easy for you to say.
[05:05] Takeru
    I'm just not cut out for this,
    on a fundamental level.
[05:08] Ikaruga
    Oh, all right.
[05:10] Ikaruga
    I suppose I can help.
[05:14] Usagi
    How so?
[05:15] Ikaruga
    I hear a D-rank magical item that'd gone missing
    is going to be traded illegally tonight.
[05:21] Ikaruga
    If we arrest the people involved,
     we'll earn a fair amount of points, right?
[05:26] Usagi
    That's awesome!
[05:28] Sougetsu
    Good afternoon, children!
[05:32] Takeru
    Chairman...
[05:33] Sougetsu
    Did I startle you?
[05:34] Sougetsu
    Did you go shot like you were down?
[05:39] Ikaruga
    What do you want?
[05:40] Ikaruga
    I thought a big shot like you would be
     too busy to visit a dingy platoon like ours.
[05:45] Sougetsu
    Impertinent as usual, I see.
[05:48] Sougetsu
    I hear nothing but bad things about you kids,
[05:51] Sougetsu
    but I personally like how you
     stick out like a sore thumb.
[05:56] Sougetsu
    Even so, your platoon's performance
    leaves much to be desired.
[06:02] Sougetsu
    Which is why I'm here...
[06:04] Sougetsu
    I've brought backup for
     the 35th Test Platoon.
[06:08] Takeru
    Backup?
[06:10] Sougetu
    Come on in.
[06:13] Sougetsu
    Former official inquisitor, Ohtori Ouka.
[06:15] Sougetsu
    She has transferred to the
     high school division for reasons.
[06:19] Ouka
    Nice to meet you.
[06:20] Sougetsu
    Well, I hope you all get along well.
[06:23] Takeru
    Ohtori Ouka...
[06:27] Usagi
    I've heard of her...
[06:29] Usagi
    In middle school, she was a top
    student who became an inquisitor
[06:33] ---
    in just a year and a half.
[06:35] Sougetsu
    And she's also my daughter!
[06:37] Sougetsu
    Don't you see the resemblance?
[06:39] Sougetsu
    The shape of our eyebrows and our
    noses, or our general cuteness?
[06:44] Ouka
    I'm only his daughter on paper.
[06:46] Ouka
    We aren't related by blood,
    so please don't misconstrue.
[06:50] Usagi
    I can't say I'm too fond of
    prodigies and privileged kids.
[06:55] Usagi
    Wait, do you know her?
[06:58] Takeru
    Yeah.
[07:02] Takeru
    We were... classmates.
[07:04] Ikaruga
    And why did this Ohtori Ouka quit the
     official inquisition to join our platoon?
[07:09] Ouka
    Sorry, but I can't tell you the reason.
[07:15] Sougetsu
    Well, I'll just leave you kids to it!
[07:20] Takeru
    O-Ohtori...
[07:22] Takeru
    L-Long time no see...
[07:25] ---
    How've you been?
[07:29] Ouka
    Who're you?
[07:36] Ikaruga
    Since this is your first day,
[07:38] ---
    why don't you stand by at the platoon HQ?
[07:41] Ouka
    No. I'm fine.
[07:42] ---
    I'll participate in the mission.
[07:44] Ikaruga
    Really? I don't care either way,
     but you sure are fired up.
[07:48] Ouka
    Relax. I won't hold you back.
[07:51] Ikaruga
    Then let me explain the mission once again.
[07:53] Ikaruga
    Our target this time is an
    Andreff Jaeger anthology
[07:56] ---
    written in the early years
    of the witch hunt wars:
[07:59] Ikaruga
    a first edition copy of Unorthodox Psalms*.
[08:01] Ikaruga
    Since it's not the original,
[08:02] ---
    it's not powerful enough*
    to actually produce magic.
[08:05] Ikaruga
    But when it was printed,
    Andreff himself infused it with some.
[08:10] Ikaruga
    That magic makes readers go crazy and
     drives them to suicide, apparently.
[08:14] Takeru
    She probably hacked into another
    platoon's mission data again...
[08:18] Takeru
    Usagi, how are things on your end?
[08:20] Usagi
    Th-There's only one place with lights on:
    an office on the seventh floor.
[08:24] Usagi
    I-I see two people!
[08:26] Takeru
    Okay. Seventh floor it is.
[08:28] Usagi
    I-I'm not nervous, you know!
[08:31] Usagi
    I'm offended that you think that way.
[08:34] Usagi
    I-I'm merely being cautious.
[08:37] Takeru
    No one asked if you were nervous.
[08:40] Takeru
    Ohtori.
[08:41] Takeru
    Circle around the hallway
     on the opposite side.
[08:43] Takeru
    Once I give the signal, charge in.
[08:46] Mafia A
    By the way, there's one
    more thing I want you to buy.
[08:50] Mafia A
    It's a first edition copy of Unorthodox Psalms.
[08:53] Mari
    You're a complete and utter idiot.
[08:56] Mari
    You underestimate the inquisitors far too much.
[08:59] Mafia A
    Who cares if I'm discovered?
[09:01] Mafia A
    I've got that thing you guys gave me.
[09:04] Takeru
    Enemy spotted. One by the entrance.
[09:07] Takeru
    Once I give the signal,
    I'll jump out as a decoy.
[09:09] Takeru
    Ohtori, you shoot the guard.
[09:11] Ouka
    Roger.
[09:12] Takeru
    Usagi, begin sniping three
    seconds after the signal.
[09:14] Usagi
    R-Roger.
[09:16] Takeru
    Ikaruga, keep watch on the surroundings.
[09:18] Ikaruga
    Roger.
[09:22] Takeru
    All right.
[09:23] Takeru
    Commence mission!
[09:25] Mafia B
    Damn you!
[09:32] Usagi
    I did it, Kusanagi!
[09:34] Usagi
    I'm the best!
[09:36] Takeru
    This is the inquisition!
[09:37] Takeru
    You're under arrest on charges of
    illegal possession and theft of magical items!
[09:47] Takeru
    Um...
[09:49] ---
    Usagi-san?
[09:50] Usagi
    You saw my handiwork, didn't you?
    Aren't I awesome?!
[09:52] Usagi
    I blew both their heads off!
[09:55] Takeru
    You're not supposed to!
[09:57] Takeru
    Wait, did you shoot into the wrong building?
[10:01] Usaig
    Th-This sort of thing can happen sometimes!
[10:04] Takeru
    Like hell it can!
[10:05] Mari
    I told you so.
[10:08] Mari
    Well, have fun getting rid of them.
[10:11] Takeru
    Wait!
[10:11] Mafia C
    Don't move!
[10:13] Mafia C
    He said he's with the inquisition.
[10:17] ---
    Isn't this bad?
[10:18] Mafia D
    Don't panic. Take a look.
[10:21] Mafia D
    You're a student at Anti-Magic
    Academy, aren't you?
[10:24] Mafia D
    Are you alone?
[10:27] Takeru
    I-I'm kinda lost, you see...
[10:32] Mafia D
    Is that so?
[10:33] Mafia
    You got lost, huh? Sucks to be you.
[10:36] Mafia E
    Hey, look!
[10:37] Mafia E
    This genius is packing a sword!
[10:40] Mafia D
    I didn't realize today's
    inquisitors were so old-fashioned!
[10:44] Mafia D
    Amazing! We're up against a samurai!
[10:47] Mafia F
    Are you a mental patient?
[10:49] Mafia D
    End your sentences with
    "gozaru," like a samurai!
[10:58] Ikaruga
    Kusanagi! Don't listen to them!
[11:01] Ikaruga
    If you lose your temper now,
    things will really go south!
[11:03] Mafia C
    Swords, eh?
[11:05] ---
    What use do those have nowadays?
[11:08] Mafia C
    Swords can't beat magic or guns.
[11:10] Mafia C
    They're just scrap metal.
[11:14] Ikaruga
    Aww, it's over now. Just do as you wish.
[11:18] Mafia D
    Die, metal head!
[11:22] Takeru
    Sweeping Magic Blade!
[11:33] Mafia D
    Wh-What was that?
[11:36] ---
    What did you do?!
[11:41] Takeru
    Did you just say "scrap metal"?
[11:45] Takeru
    Prepare to die, bastards...
[11:47] Takeru
    And not in a normal way!
[11:49] Takeru
    User of the Kusanagi double-edged art,
[11:51] Takeru
    Kusanagi Takeru, will cut you down
    whether you like it or not!
[11:55] Mafia D
    Why, this little...
[12:00] Takeru
    You aren't fit to be the rust on my blade,
     so don't even think about it.
[12:03] Takeru
    I'll show you a slash so brutal,
    my sword won't even be bloodied!
[12:08] Ikaruga/Text
    Onii-chan...
[12:11] Ikaruga
    Please don't make such a scary face.
[12:15] Ikaruga
    Have you calmed down, Kusanagi?
[12:17] Ikaruga
    That was my voice, you sister lover.
[12:20] Ikaruga
    How'd you like it?
     Sounded like her, right?
[12:22] Ikaruga
    Anyway...
[12:24] ---
    How are you getting out of this mess?
[12:29] Takeru
    I was just kidding.
[12:30] Takeru
    It was a joke!
[12:32] Takeru
    There's no such thing as a slash
    that doesn't bloody the sword!
[12:38] Mafia
    What?!
[12:59] Takeru
    Wow...
[13:01] Ouka
    Hey, you there.
[13:03] ---
    Resistance is futile.
[13:05] Ouka
    Just hand over Unorthodox Psalms.
[13:08] Mafia A
    Drop dead, all of you!
[13:11] Takeru
    Instant Magic?
[13:12] Ouka
    Scumbag! Makes me sick to my stomach!
[13:18] Mari
    Oh, dear. So he used it, huh?
[13:24] Takeru
    A Dragoon?
[13:26] Takeru
    Why does he have one of
     the inquisition's weapons?!
[13:27] Ikaruga
    This is bad!
[13:29] Ikaruga
    Usagi, hurry to the sniping point!
[13:31] Usagi
    Give me one more minute!
[13:33] Takeru
    Ohtori!
[13:34] Ouka
    Get down, and stay out of the way.
[13:38] Mafia A
    Don't you look down on me.
[13:39] Mafia A
    I'm not about to get arrested here!
[13:44] Takeru
    Ohtori!
[13:46] Mafia A
    Quit running around!
[13:59] Mafia A
    Why'd it stop moving?
[14:00] Mafia A
    Move! Move!
[14:07] Ouka
    The old Dragoon has one glaring weakness:
    the fragility of its joint drive mechanism.
[14:11] Ouka
    Furthermore, it's not made
    for close quarters combat.
[14:14] Mafia A
    Damn it!
[14:15] Ouka
    This is what happens when an
    amateur tries to use a Dragoon.
[14:19] Ouka
    I hope you learned your lesson.
[14:20] Takeru
    She's in a league of her own...
[14:26] Takeru
    Are you hurt, Ohtori?
[14:28] Ouka
    I'm fine.
[14:46] Takeru
    Well, uh...
[14:48] ---
    D-Don't worry!
[14:50] Takeru
    I'm more into flat chests.
[14:54] Takeru
    S-Sorry! Just kidding!
     That's not the issue here, is it?
[14:57] Ouka
    Just get off of me already!
[15:00] Takeru
    Wait, wait! Calm down, Ohtori!
[15:05] Usagi
    Kusanagi! I did it!
[15:07] Usagi
    I'm sure I hit the mark with that one!
[15:09] Takeru
    It's gonna end up like this anyway, huh?
[15:13] Ouka
    Hey! Don't fall asleep there!
[15:16] Ouka
    What is wrong with this platoon?!
[15:32] Usagi
    What are you playing at?
     I demand an explanation!
[15:35] Usagi
    Ever since then, you keep running off
     to handle missions by yourself.
[15:41] Usagi
    Don't you realize it's making us lose all face?
[15:44] Ouka
    If you want to go on missions as a platoon,
    then feel free to do so without me.
[15:49] Ouka
    I want no part of it.
    I'll be fine by myself.
[15:51] Usagi
    I've never felt so insulted in my life!
[15:54] Usagi
    Who do you think you are?!
[15:56] Ikaruga
    Don't waste your breath.
[15:57] Ikaruga
    She won't listen to anything you say.
[16:00] Ikaruga
    She's only interested in her own goals.
[16:03] Ouka
    Then let me make this clear.
[16:06] Ouka
    First, Saionji. Your sniping
    has a fatal flaw to it.
[16:12] Ouka
    You crumble under pressure and lose all accuracy.
    How can I trust you to have my back?
[16:19] Ouka
    Next, Suginami.
[16:21] ---
    You're a skilled mechanic. I'll give you that.
[16:23] Ouka
    But you go too far with your modifications.
[16:26] Ouka
    Don't stick a full-automatic
    function on a 9mm pistol.
[16:30] Ikaruga
    Yeah, yeah.
[16:31] Ouka
    And Kusanagi, you should've been
     the one to say what I just said.
[16:37] Ouka
    Do you want your subordinates
     to die pointless deaths?
[16:40] Ouka
    You're a disgrace as a captain.
[16:44] Takeru
    You may well be right.
[16:47] Ouka
    You have no right to call
    yourself an inquisitor.
[16:55] Ikaruga
    Ability trumps everything for her, huh?
[16:58] Ikaruga
    Is she incapable of trusting anyone but herself?
[17:01] Takeru
    Well, she was pretty much on the money.
[17:05] Takeru
    But...
[17:06] Usagi
    What is it?
[17:08] Takeru
    Well, she's one of us now,
     so we gotta patch things up somehow.
[17:12] Ikaruga
    But it doesn't seem like Miss High-and-Mighty
     wants to play nice with us.
[17:18] Takeru
    I have a plan...
SIGN    Small Fry Platoon New Member Welcoming Party
[17:24] Usagi
    It's all finished, Kusanagi!
[17:26] Usagi
    A masterpiece, even if I do say so myself!
[17:29] Usagi
    It's an anko-and-cream shortcake my grandma
[17:31] ---
    taught me to bake when I was a child!
[17:34] Takeu
    Usagi, you really can cook, huh?
[17:37] Ikaruga
    Now that we're on board with your
    "plan," we can't back out...
[17:41] Ikaruga
    But couldn't we have gone
     with something better?
[17:44] Takeru
    Don't worry!
[17:46] Takeru
    Welcoming parties were highly
    recommended in this book,
[17:49] ---
    How to Work with New Employees.
[17:52] Takeru
    I'm sure even Ohtori will open her
    heart up to us a little after this!
[17:56] Ikaruga
    You have a child's blind optimism...
[17:58] Ouka
    I'm coming in.
[18:02] Takeru
    Welcome to the 35th Platoon!
[18:06] Ouka
    Partying during platoon activity hours?
[18:11] Ouka
    Good for you, Captain.
[18:13] Takeru
    Uh, actually, we did this for you...
[18:16] Ouka
    Fraternizing isn't my thing.
[18:19] Takeru
    Hey!
[18:21] Takeru
    How'd you get that wound?
[18:22] Ouka
    That's none of your business.
[18:24] Takeru
    Hey!
[18:25] Takeru
    Hang on a second.
[18:26] Takeru
    I'll take care of it right away!
[18:28] Ouka
    Besides, unlike you people, I didn't
    become an inquisitor for fun and games.
[18:34] Takeru
    Ohtori!
[18:38] Takeru
    Wait! Where are you going?!
[18:41] Ouka
    I told you it was none of your business.
[18:45] Takeru
    But it is!
[18:47] Takeru
    I'm your comrade, not to mention your captain.
[18:51] Ouka
    I don't consider you
    worthy to be my captain.
[18:54] Ouka
    And I don't want to be your comrade, either.
[18:56] Takeru
    I don't care how you see it.
    I am your captain.
[19:00] Takeru
    And I'm not about to leave an
    injured member of my platoon alone!
[19:05] Ouka
    Oh, do whatever you like!
[19:12] Takeru
    Valhalla?
[19:13] Ouka
    It's a magic association
    which nobody knows much about.
[19:16] Ouka
    It's quite likely that they were the
    other party in that trade the other day.
[19:21] Takeru
    And you're saying Valhalla was behind this, too?
[19:24] Ouka
    Yes...
[19:26] Takeru
    Let's go!
[19:27] Ouka
    W-Wait!
[19:28] Ouka
    You idiot!
[19:31] Thug A
    Who the hell are you?!
[19:39] Takeru
    Thanks for the help back there.
[19:40] Ouka
    I'll go check on the container.
[19:43] Ouka
    Restrain those two.
[19:45] Takeru
    Sure.
[19:49] Takeru
    I wonder how Ohtori is doing.
[19:58] Takeru
    Are these...
[20:02] Ouka
    Sorry...
[20:04] ---
    I was too late...
[20:07] ---
    It must have hurt...
[20:10] Ouka
    But you don't have to suffer anymore.
[20:13] Ouka
    You'll be fine now...
[20:17] Ouka
    I'll shoulder it all for you.
[20:21] Takeru
    Ohtori...
[20:26] Takeru
    Hey!
[20:29] Takeru
    What are you doing? Stop!
[20:31] Ouka
    Move it!
[20:32] Ouka
    I'm killing them!
[20:33] Takeru
    You know what will happen if you
    kill them right now, don't you?!
[20:37] Takeru
    You really will lose your
    inquisitor's license!
[20:40] Ouka
    I'll kill them all!
[20:42] Ouka
    These bastards! The witches! Everyone!
[20:44] Takeru
    You can't!
[20:46] Takeru
    Didn't you become an inquisitor so you
     could prevent more victims like her?!
[20:49] Ouka
    So you think I should just let them go,
[20:51] Ouka
    after what they did?!
[20:52] Takeru
    If you lose it now, there
    will be more victims!
[20:54] Ouka
    A witch killed my family!
[20:59] Ouka
    A witch stole everything from me!
[21:01] Ouka
    So I hate witches,
    and everything to do with magic!
[21:06] Ouka
    I vowed to dedicate my life to
    the extermination of witches!
[21:10] ---
    That has never changed,
    and it never will until I die!
[21:14] Takeru
    Ohtori...
[21:19] Ouka
    If I work with others, they'll
    get in the way of my revenge.
[21:24] Ouka
    That's why I can't be your comrade.
[21:30] Takeru
    Don't!
[21:39] Takeru
    No, you can.
[21:42] Takeru
    I won't pretend to understand
    what you've gone through.
[21:46] Takeru
    But I also won't give up
    trying to become your comrade.
[22:05] Lapis
    Kusanagi Takeru...
SIGN    Summon the Hero