E5 - Blood-or-Die! Desert Island Survival

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:09] Masaki
    Why are you the only one here?
[00:12] Masaki
    Didn't I tell you?
[00:13] Masaki
    Fu's cover song,
[00:15] Masaki
    Tokage's gambling,
[00:16] Masaki
    Ichiko's cooking,
[00:18] Masaki
    and your mukbang...
[00:20] Masaki
    Since your solo content's been gaining steam,
[00:22] Masaki
    it's time to put more effort
    into videos with everybody.
[00:24] Live
    I-I feel ya.
[00:26] Live
    Sorry. They're all out at the moment.
[00:29] Masaki
    Out, you say?
[00:30] Masaki
    Even though I pulled an all-nighter
[00:33] Masaki
    to finish my editing work
    in time for today's shoot?
[00:36] Live
    Well, you know how it is.
[00:38] Masaki
    No, I don't!
[00:38] Masaki
    Do you not care?!
[00:40] Masaki
    You think you're hot stuff because
     your solo vids are doing okay?
[00:43] Masaki
    Get real!
[00:44] Live
    Sorry—
[00:45] Masaki
    I've had it!
[00:46] Masaki
    You're not getting my blood!
[00:48] Live
    Please!
[00:49] Live
    Don't abandon me!
[00:51] Live
    I'll do anything you want!
[00:52] Masaki
    Anything?
[00:54] Masaki
    Then go take a trip here by yourselves!
[00:57] Live
    Tra-Pickle Island?
SIGN    A Must for This Summer!
    Desert Island Booking Plan
SIGN    Tra-Pickle Island
SIGN    Whole Island Rental!
SIGN    A once-in-a-lifetime memory!
    Want to experience
    the ultimate adventure?
SIGN    Highlights of
    Tra-Pickle Island
[00:59] Masaki
    A one-week desert island survival challenge.
[01:02] Live
    What?
SIGN    Normally, you need special permission
    to film on a desert island
[01:04] Masaki
    You'll be taking care of all the
    planning and filming by yourselves,
[01:07] Masaki
    so bring me back a proper video!
[01:09] Masaki
    Good night!
[01:10] Live
    Hey! Masaki!
[01:14] Live
    What even goes into a proper video?
SIGN    Blood-or-Die! Desert Island Survival
[02:54] Ichiko
    The ocean!
[02:55] Ichiko
    The sandy beach!
[02:56] Ichiko
    A desert island!
[03:00] Ichiko
    Hey, what's with that attitude?!
[03:03] Tokage
    Another thousand yen and I would have had it.
[03:05] Tokage
    Why'd I get dragged out here?
[03:08] Fu
    I was in the middle of my shift.
[03:10] Ichiko
    And I was in the middle of shopping for dinner!
[03:14] Ichiko
    But now that we're here,
    we might as well enjoy it!
[03:20] Ichiko
    L-Live-sama!
[03:21] Live
    All eyes on me!
SIGN    MayoPan's
    One-Week Desert Island
    Survival Challenge
[03:23] Live
    This is MayoPan's one-week
    desert island survival challenge!
SIGN    MayoPan's
    One-Week Desert Island
    Survival Challenge
[03:30] Live
    Here's the agenda for day one!
SIGN    Day One
SIGN    Set up camp
    Start a fire
    Collect drinking water
SIGN    Day One
SIGN    Set up camp
    Start a fire
    Collect drinking water
[03:34] Live
    Leveling the ground!
[03:35] Live
    Gathering flotsam!
[03:37] Live
    Breaking a sweat putting up a tent!
[03:40] Live
    Getting blisters while using a hand drill friction,
[03:43] Live
    until at last, we start a fire!
[03:45] Live
    Exploring the area until
    we find potable water!
[03:49] Live
    Collecting and boiling it!
[03:51] Live
    Tasty!
[03:53] Live
    Day two!
[03:54] Live
    Struggling to catch fish in the water to eat!
[03:55] Live
    A perfect set of plans, as proper as can be!
[03:59] Live
    Come back!
[03:59] Live
    Come back, Masaki's blood!
[04:02] Live
    That's all!
SIGN    The End
[04:03] Live
    Any questions?
[04:04] Tokage
    Do we really gotta do all that?
[04:07] Tokage
    I wanna take it easy.
[04:08] Ichiko
    Tokage!
[04:09] Ichiko
    Live-sama spent good time planning this!
[04:11] Tokage
    Not my problem.
[04:13] Live
    Here!
[04:14] Live
    Surviving on a desert island in swimsuits!
[04:17] Live
    This is guaranteed to rake in the clicks!
[04:20] Live
    And if we strike it rich...
[04:23] Live
    You can play all the
     pachinko and slots you want!
[04:25] Live
    Or sing all you want with a pro live band!
[04:30] Live
    Or, er... eat all the snacks you want?
[04:33] Tokage
    Let's do this, girls!
[04:36] Live
    A perfect motivational speech, too!
SIGN    Recording
SIGN    Day 1
[04:43] Live
    Good morning from the dead of night!
[04:46] Live
    Mayonaka Punch!
[04:48] Live
    Live here!
[04:48] Ichiko
    Ichiko!
[04:49] Fu
    I'm Fu.
[04:50] Tokage
    Tokage!
[04:53] Live
    Ichiko, Tokage.
[04:54] Live
    Take this seriously.
[04:55] Ichiko
    Aye aye!
[04:57] Live
    As of today...
[04:59] Live
    We'll be starting a one-week,
    girls-only desert island survival challenge!
[05:04] Fu
    And of course, it'll be survival in the
    dead of night, the MayoPan way!
[05:08] Ichiko
    Let's get down to business
    with our plans for the first day!
[05:11] Tokage
    Today, we'll be setting up camp using flotsam.
[05:14] Tokage
    I can build anything,
    from a castle to a log cabin—
[05:16] Live
    This will be our home base!
[05:17] Live
    There's plenty of space,
    and it should be easy to level out.
[05:20] Live
    Perfect for setting up camp!
[05:22] Live
    Okay!
[05:23] Live
    We've got a lot of work ahead
    starting from day one!
[05:25] Live
    Let's get pumped up!
[05:26] Live
    Here we go!
[05:29] Masaki
    Yeah.
[05:30] Masaki
    Wonder if that's what they're
    saying right about now.
[05:34] Masaki
    Man, TSUMA-shi's good!
[05:36] Masaki
    His editing here is so slick!
[05:40] Live
    Oh, wow!
[05:42] Live
    Night-vision mode works better than I thought!
[05:44] Live
    Very nice.
[05:46] Live
    Boy, flotsam is pretty hard to find, huh?
[05:51] Live
    Oh, right now, everyone else
    is preparing to set up camp.
[05:55] Live
    And that's why...
[05:56] Live
    Huh?
[05:57] Live
    Whoa!
[05:59] Live
    Look at this!
[06:00] Live
    A tarp!
[06:01] Live
    Just what we need to protect us
    from the rain and wind!
[06:04] Live
    Wait, there's driftwood here as well!
[06:05] Live
    Sweet!
[06:06] Sign
    Tomatoes
[06:06] Live
    A can and a plastic bottle, too!
[06:09] Live
    Awesome, no punctures!
[06:11] Live
    We can use this to collect water,
[06:13] Live
    and cook on the campfire with this can,
[06:14] Live
    and even make salt from seawater!
[06:16] Live
    The perfect find for some peace of mind!
[06:19] Live
    With that, I've got what I need!
[06:21] Live
    Time to head back to base!
SIGN    Recording
[06:24] Live
    So heavy...
[06:27] Live
    I'm dying here!
[06:36] Live
    The more shots, the better.
SIGN    Recording
[06:41] Live
    I'm back!
[06:42] Ichiko
    Welcome back, Live-sama!
[06:44] Live
    The hell's this?!
[06:46] Tokage
    The perfect base, of course!
[06:48] Tokage
    It's DIY! D-I-Y!
[06:51] Live
    You really built a house?!
[06:52] Live
    What happened to survival?!
[06:55] Fu
    Live-sama, I made sure to get all of it!
[07:01] Ichiko
    Heave-ho, heave-ho!
[07:06] Live
    I think you've exceeded the
     limits of human ability.
[07:10] Tokage
    I'm so sad.
[07:12] Tokage
    This...
[07:14] Tokage
    turned into this!
[07:17] Tokage
    All my hard work...
[07:19] Live
    All right, here we go!
[07:20] Ichiko
    Let's go all out and start this fire!
[07:22] Live
    Listen up, everyone.
[07:24] Live
    The struggle to start a fire
    is what matters here.
[07:26] Live
    Even survival pros can take hours just to...
[07:33] Ichiko
    You can start a fire in no time!
[07:35] Ichiko
    How amusing.
[07:36] Live
    Not if you're human, you can't!
[07:38] Fu
    Live-sama, how's this?
[07:41] Live
    Fu, you get it!
[07:44] Fu
    I-It's working!
[07:46] Live
    Ichiko, the dry grass!
[07:48] Ichiko
    Here, dry grass!
[07:49] Fu
    Thanks.
[07:50] Tokage
    Dang, you're a real natural, Fu.
[07:57] Live
    You did it!
[07:58] Ichiko
    Good job!
[08:01] Tokage
    I forgot to press record.
[08:07] Ichiko
    What a slow trickle.
[08:09] Tokage
    Slow as molasses.
[08:10] Fu
    Slow and steady.
[08:11] Live
    Listen, people want to see—
[08:13] Tokage
    If we crack this baby open,
    the water'll come shooting out!
[08:16] Tokage
    Mayonaka Pun—
[08:19] Live
    You know you can't just punch
    a rock in half, right?
[08:22] Tokage
    R-Right.
SIGN    Tomatoes
[08:26] Live
    Okay, let's start boiling this.
[08:31] Live
    Why are you drinking it?!
[08:33] Ichiko
    Huh?
[08:33] Live
    You need to boil the water before drinking it!
[08:35] Live
    If you were human,
    you'd be in for a really bad time!
[08:38] Ichiko
    But I'm a vampire—
[08:39] Ichiko
    Ah!
[08:40] Ichiko
    Tee-hee!
SIGN    Instead of Drinking Water,
SIGN    We Ate Only
SIGN    Watermelon
SIGN    Watermelon
SIGN    For 1 Whole Week
SIGN    For 1 Whole Week
[08:48] Masaki
    Managed to get it done.
SIGN    Back
SIGN    Publish
[08:54] Masaki
    I wonder how they're all doing.
[08:57] Masaki
    Not that I'm expecting much.
[08:59] Masaki
    Whatever. Time for a drink!
[09:08] Live
    Tokage!
[09:14] Live
    They sure are a handful.
SIGN    Day 2
[09:21] Live
    Ta-dah!
[09:22] Live
    Good morning from the dead of night!
SIGN    Recording
[09:24] Live
    This is day two of life on a desert island!
[09:27] Live
    Today, we're diving into the water
    to catch some fish!
[09:30] Live
    Who will be the first to snag one?
[09:33] Live
    Okay, let's get started!
[09:36] Live
    Now...
[09:37] Live
    Where the hell did they go?!
[09:42] Fu
    Here?
[09:43] Ichiko
    If you don't, then who will?
[09:45] Ichiko
    You're MayoPan's star singer, Fu!
[09:48] Fu
    S-Star singer...
[09:50] Ichiko
    Okay! Take it away!
[09:52] Ichiko
    Take it away!
[09:54] Ichiko
    Take it away!
[09:55] Fu
    Okay, please listen!
[10:02] Tokage
    Are ya ready?
[10:04] Tokage
    Here we go!
[10:07] Tokage
    Okay, place yer bets!
[10:13] Tokage
    Even on 2-2, huh?
[10:16] Tokage
    Then I'll go for odd on 4-1!
[10:19] Tokage
    Open!
[10:20] Tokage
    Even on 2-2?!
[10:23] Tokage
    I lost!
[10:27] Live
    Got myself a coconut crab.
[10:33] Live
    Here we go!
[11:06] Live
    Got it! I'm first!
[11:09] Tokage
    Hi-yah!
[11:20] Group
    Victory!
[11:22] Live
    You're going way too wild!
[11:24] Live
    There's no way humans could catch a marlin!
[11:28] Ichiko
    The bigger the better!
[11:29] Live
    No way!
[11:30] Tokage
    What's the big deal?
[11:31] Tokage
    Hell, why are we even on this desert island?
[11:34] Live
    To shoot a video, what else?!
[11:36] Live
    Let's do this the right way!
[11:38] Live
    We barely have any usable footage
    from the past two days!
[11:41] Fu
    She's right.
[11:42] Fu
    You two need to take it down a notch.
[11:44] Ichiko
    I don't want to hear that from you!
[11:46] Ichiko
    You were about to sing, too!
[11:48] Fu
    That's not relevant right now.
[11:50] Ichiko
    How sassy!
[11:51] Ichiko
    I don't need sass from you, Fu!
[11:53] Fu
    What's that mean?!
[11:55] Ichiko
    You're my lackey!
[11:55] Tokage
    Ugh, I'm starving. Time for some blood.
[11:56] Fu
    That's not true!
[11:58] Ichiko
    Do you understand me?!
[12:01] Ichiko
    Huh?
[12:01] Fu
    What is it?
[12:02] Live
    What now?
[12:03] Tokage
    The blood... isn't here!
[12:06] Tokage
    We forgot to bring it.
[12:29] Reporter
    Next, we have the weather.
SIGN    Typhoon Warning
[12:31] Reporter
    The typhoon that formed in the Philippine Sea
    yesterday continues to grow stronger,
SIGN    Typhoon Warning
SIGN    Tra-Pickle Island
SIGN    Extremely Strong
SIGN    Storm Area
SIGN    Strong Wind Area
[12:36] Reporter
    and is currently passing through
    the Tra-Pickle Island region.
[12:58] Fu
    Everyone, this way!
[13:03] Masaki
    Yay!
[13:05] Masaki
    Now then, let's set all this up!
[13:13] Tokage
    I want some blood!
[13:15] Ichiko
    You know we don't have any!
[13:17] Tokage
    Well, why not?!
[13:18] Live
    Calm down!
[13:19] Ichiko
    I wish I could!
[13:21] Tokage
    Blood! Where's my blood?!
[13:23] Live
    Why don't we film today's part for now?
SIGN    Day 3
SIGN    Recording
[13:29] Live
    T-Ta-dah!
[13:31] Live
    Day three on a desert island!
[13:33] Live
    Today, we'll be, um...
[13:36] Live
    Tokage!
[13:37] Tokage
    Sorry, but I'm getting outta here!
[13:46] Tokage
    Too low on blood.
[13:49] Tokage
    I know! My phone!
[13:50] Tokage
    I'll call for help on my phone!
[13:52] Tokage
    No service!
SIGN    No Service
[13:55] Tokage
    I need...
[13:56] Tokage
    I need to go home!
[13:59] Tokage
    The parlor is getting new machines!
    I asked Ichijo-kun to tune the pins!
[14:03] Tokage
    Chance Akaishi's waiting for me!
[14:15] Tokage
    I know! A raft!
[14:32] Tokage
    No!
[14:35] Tokage
    I'm all out of ideas.
[14:37] Ichiko
    Blood... I want blood.
[14:40] Fu
    If I sing...
[14:42] Fu
    Even if I sing a song,
    I still can't distract myself!
[14:46] Live
    Hey! It'll be okay!
[14:48] Live
    I'm sure Masaki will notice
    and come to our rescue!
[14:51] Live
    Let's focus on shooting our video until then!
[14:53] Live
    'Kay?
SIGN    Day 4
[14:55] Fu
    Live-sama.
[14:57] Fu
    Live-sama!
[15:10] Masaki
    There!
SIGN    Day 5
SIGN    Staying Up Late
    on a Sunday
SIGN    Day 6
[16:03] Live
    Tokage's finally gone into
    low-energy mode as well.
SIGN    Day 7
[16:13] Masaki
    Lighting, check!
[16:14] Masaki
    Camera angle, check!
[16:16] Masaki
    Let's get to it!
[16:17] Masaki
    Good morning from the dead of night!
[16:20] Masaki
    Mayonaka Punch...
[16:31] Masaki
    Setup, check.
[16:45] Live
    In the end, nothing turned out
    the way I planned.
[16:51] Live
    But I need to finish the job, at least!
SIGN    Recording
[16:57] Live
    Live here!
[16:58] Live
    We're finally done with our
    seven-day survival challenge!
[17:02] Live
    Good work, everyone!
[17:06] Live
    We ran into all sorts of
    mishaps this time around.
[17:10] Live
    There's a lot we didn't get around to doing.
[17:13] Live
    Let's think of those as future goals for now.
SIGN    Recording
[17:18] Live
    Next time, we'll prepare more thoroughly.
[17:21] Live
    For a more perfect time surviving...
[17:26] Live
    Surviving...
[17:31] Live
    Okay, everyone, until next time.
SIGN    Day 8
[17:38] Masaki
    The week's up,
    so why aren't they back yet?
[17:43] Masaki
    We still need to record
    their closing remarks—
[17:46] Masaki
    Ow!
[17:48] Masaki
    What's this?!
[17:50] Masaki
    This is their supply.
[17:53] Masaki
    Wait, what?!
[17:54] Masaki
    Does that mean they left this behind?!
[17:57] Masaki
    Can they go without blood for a week?
[18:07] Live
    So cold...
[18:11] Live
    I just wish I could've tasted
    Masaki's blood before the end.
[18:17] Live
    Masaki...
[18:37] Live
    Huh?
[18:39] Live
    I can go ahead?
[18:44] Live
    At long last!
[18:46] Live
    I get to drink Masaki's blood!
[18:48] Live
    Time to dig in!
[18:54] Masaki
    Live.
[18:55] Masaki
    Live!
[18:57] Masaki
    How's it going?
[19:00] Live
    Wh-What are you doing here?!
[19:02] Masaki
    What kind of question is that?!
[19:03] Masaki
    You're the ones who forgot to bring the blood!
[19:05] Yuki
    Talk about causing trouble.
[19:08] Live
    Shige?!
[19:09] Yuki
    Do you know how hard it is to fly
    across the ocean carrying a human?
[19:13] Yuki
    You there!
[19:15] Yuki
    Crying won't work on me next time!
[19:17] Masaki
    H-Huh?!
[19:18] Masaki
    Can you stop making stuff up?!
[19:20] Masaki
    You upside-down liar!
[19:21] Yuki
    You're the one who was crying
    about how they might be dead.
[19:25] Yuki
    Upside-down or not.
[19:26] Tokage
    Gimme some more blood!
[19:28] Ichiko
    You already had plenty!
[19:30] Fu
    Please stop fighting!
[19:32] Masaki
    I-I didn't cry or anything.
[19:33] Yuki
    Hey, now! Wait your turn!
[19:38] Masaki
    Live?
[19:43] Masaki
    What's wrong?
[19:45] Live
    I wasn't able to shoot a proper video at all.
[19:49] Live
    I'm nothing but a failure!
[19:51] Masaki
    Hey, just calm down.
[19:53] Live
    I can't show you any of the footage we shot!
[19:56] Live
    Scrap it! Throw it away!
[19:57] Live
    I'm sorry!
[19:58] Masaki
    I already watched it.
[20:01] Masaki
    Skimmed it, at least.
[20:03] Live
    Why'd you look?!
[20:05] Masaki
    It's good stuff.
[20:06] Live
    What?
[20:07] Masaki
    Chopping down a tree bare-handed won't fly,
[20:11] Masaki
    but starting the fire in a flash,
    or drinking untreated water...
[20:15] Masaki
    You even managed to put up a tent.
[20:17] Masaki
    Right?
[20:18] Live
    But we can't use most of it!
[20:20] Live
    It's totally absurd, not to mention
    beyond human ability.
[20:23] Masaki
    There are plenty of editing tricks
    we can use for that.
[20:26] Masaki
    You need material that's entertaining
    before anything else.
[20:29] Live
    But there was also the marlin,
    and then the typhoon.
[20:33] Live
    Most of the back half is just us half-dead.
[20:35] Live
    It's just one disaster after another.
[20:37] Masaki
    What's wrong with disasters?
[20:39] Masaki
    You don't end up half-dead every day.
[20:41] Masaki
    You got real lucky!
[20:43] Live
    That's totally off!
[20:44] Live
    You can't make a proper video like that!
[20:47] Masaki
    No, sure you can.
[20:49] Live
    What?
[20:50] Masaki
    Maybe it didn't go the way you planned it,
[20:53] Masaki
    but it shows you all trying your hardest.
[20:56] Masaki
    All of that taken as a whole
    is what makes for a good video.
[20:59] Masaki
    Like the time with the garlic.
[21:02] Masaki
    You did a proper good job.
[21:04] Live
    Then I'm...
[21:06] Masaki
    All good.
[21:08] Live
    Does that mean...
[21:10] Live
    I can drink your blood?
[21:12] Masaki
    Not what we agreed on.
[21:14] Live
    Ah, okay.
[21:17] Masaki
    Still, looks like you need me
    in charge after all.
[21:21] Masaki
    I'll need to roll up my sleeves
    to edit this bad boy!
[21:24] Live
    I'll...
[21:25] Live
    I'll help you edit it!
[21:27] Live
    I'll do what I can with your help!
[21:31] Masaki
    Let me warn you:
    You need a real good eye for editing.
[21:35] Masaki
    If you half-ass it, I'm calling off that
    promise about my blood for good!
[21:39] Live
    No problem!
[21:40] Live
    I'm a real go-getter when it comes to it!
[21:47] Masaki
    Happy to have you!
SIGN    Live
    Sent you a sticker
SIGN    Goodnight
[23:25] Live
    Live here!
[23:26] Masaki
    Masaki.
[23:27] Live
    Can't believe we forgot the blood!
SIGN    Nearby Residents Concerned
SIGN    Lives in Vicinity
SIGN    It suddenly collapsed and scared me to death
[23:28] Masaki
    That's the most important thing!
[23:29] Live
    Tsk, tsk. That's where you're wrong!
[23:31] Masaki
    Huh?
[23:31] Live
    The most important thing to me is Masaki...
[23:33] Masaki
    Yeah, yeah.
[23:33] Live
    ...'s blood!
[23:34] Masaki
    It always comes back to that!
[23:35] Group
    Next time: "Ichiko's Wish"!
SIGN    Ichiko's Wish
[23:37] Live
    I wanna drink your blood!