E8 - Naughty Skits

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    O Sir Crawford, wherefore art thou Sir Crawford?
SIGN    I will leave the name of Crawford as of today.
SIGN    Let us leave this town and live together.
SIGN    Yes!
SIGN    Charlotte.
SIGN    Allen.
[00:48] Dorothea
    Cut!
[00:50] Dorothea
    You think you can cut
    corners by using magic?!
[00:59] Allen
    No, that wasn't the intention...
[01:02] Dorothea
    Then what is it?
[01:03] Allen
    Well... the princess carry is a bit... embarrassing...
[01:08] Dorothea
    What are you, eight?
[01:14] Dorothea
    I'm Giving the Disgraced Noble Lady I
    Rescued a Crash Course in Naughtiness
[02:42] Sign
    Naughty Skits
[02:46] Dorothea
    It seems absolutely impossible for
    you two to flirt on your own,
[02:49] Dorothea
    so I prepared a script.
[02:52] Dorothea
    What's your problem?!
[02:54] Allen/I
    I knew I shouldn't have accepted
    this offer so casually.
[02:57] (Flashback) Dorothea
    For the sake of the new novel by extraordinary
    author, Dorothea Gri'mm Wallenstein,
[03:03] (Flashback) Dorothea
    I will need to you act lovey-dovey
    right here, right now!
[03:08] Dorothea
    I didn't even make you kiss!
[03:11] Allen
    K-Kiss?!
[03:13] Dorothea
    Just follow the script and flirt.
[03:14] Dorothea
    Then Mister Allen can have the mansion.
[03:17] Dorothea
    I get inspiration for my next novel.
[03:19] Dorothea
    It's a win-win situation!
[03:22] Allen/I
    It's for the mansion.
[03:24] Allen/I
    I have no choice.
[03:26] Allen/I
    But!
[03:27] Allen
    No, I will have to decline.
[03:30] Allen
    I'm sure Charlotte hates the idea, too!
[03:32] Charlotte
    M-Me?
[03:34] Allen
    It's impossible to flirt with
    a guy she doesn't even like.
[03:38] Charlotte
    Um, it's not impossible.
[03:42] Allen
    See, Charlotte agrees with me...
[03:46] Allen
    Huh?!
[03:47] Charlotte
    I don't mind it if it's with you, Allen...
[03:51] Charlotte
    My goodness, Allen?!
[03:53] Charlotte
    A-Are you okay?!
[03:56] Allen
    I'm fine.
[03:57] Allen
    I almost lost myself there,
    so I applied some first aid.
[04:01] Charlotte
    O-Oh no, your face is all bloody!
[04:05] Allen
    Y-Yes, but it's not a problem.
[04:08] Gosetsu
    They're flirting naturally.
[04:10] Dorothea
    That's it!
[04:12] Dorothea
    Give me more of it!
[04:14] Dorothea
    But if I leave it up to your pacing,
    even I would die of old age.
[04:18] Dorothea
    So I'm gonna ask you to stick to the script.
[04:21] Allen/I
    I've acted it out once and now I know.
[04:24] Allen/I
    It's dangerous to follow her
    script in all kinds of ways.
[04:27] Allen/I
    But if I don't, I might be
    evicted from the mansion!
[04:31] Charlotte
    Allen, let's do our best.
[04:33] Allen/I
    Since Charlotte is up for it,
    I'll have to brace myself!
[04:38] Allen
    Fine!
[04:39] Allen
    I'll do it!
[04:41] Allen
    However!
[04:42] Allen
    I will refuse anything that violates
    public order and morality!
[04:46] Dorothea
    Bring it on.
[04:48] Gosetsu
    I shall give a hand to help
    the youngsters in love.
[04:54] Lü
    Mommy is mine and no one else's!
[04:56] Lü
    I won't help!
[04:58] Lü
    But it looks kinda fun...
[05:00] Lü
    So I guess I could be talked into it?
[05:02] Dorothea
    Good! That settles it!
[05:05] Dorothea
    Here's the new script.
[05:07] Dorothea
    All you need to do is to follow it!
[05:13] Allen
    Hey! We're newlyweds?!
[05:22] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
SIGN    hELlo. I aM homE—
[05:35] Dorothea
    Cut!
[05:36] Dorothea
    You ham actor!
[05:38] Dorothea
    Watch your accent!
[05:39] Dorothea
    Be more natural!
[05:41] Allen
    S-Sorry.
[05:42] Allen
    I get nervous thinking
    that I'm being watched.
[05:46] Allen
    And what is this get up?
[05:48] Dorothea
    If you object to the setting I came
    up with, I'll take my mansion back.
[05:54] Allen
    Please don't!
[05:55] Allen
    I'll do it properly next time!
[05:57] Dorothea
    Let's try it again.
[05:58] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
SIGN    Hello. I'm home.
SIGN    Hello, dear.
SIGN    Welcome home.
[06:11] Allen/I
    Again...
SIGN    Is something the matter?
SIGN    Oh no, it's nothing.
SIGN    Would you like dinner, a bath, or....
SIGN    A piece of this?
[06:29] Dorothea
    Cut, cut!
[06:31] Dorothea
    What do you think you're doing?!
[06:34] Dorothea
    I didn't instruct you to do that!
[06:37] Charlotte
    Are you all right, Allen?
[06:39] Charlotte
    I thought I read it according to
    the script, but did I mess up?
[06:43] Allen
    No, you didn't.
[06:46] Allen
    What's messed up is...
[06:47] Allen
    You, Dorothea!
[06:49] Allen
    What are you making Charlotte say?!
[06:52] Dorothea
    What? It's nothing crazy.
[06:55] Allen
    Look, you can't make
    Charlotte say weird stuff.
[06:58] Dorothea
    Okay, fine.
[07:00] Allen/I
    Damn it!
[07:01] Allen/I
    If it weren't for the mansion's ownership
    issue, a farce like this...!
[07:06] Dorothea
    Okay, let's keep going!
[07:08] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
SIGN    I made some stew today.
SIGN    The carrots are cut up like bunnies, see?
[07:17] [SONG] Allen/I
    As expected of Charlotte, her acting is so natural.
[07:21] Allen/I
    She can be the best actress in the world!
SIGN    Please eat it while it's hot.
SIGN    Okay.
SIGN    Thank you for the food.
SIGN    Here. Open wide...
SIGN    Ah...
[07:38] Allen/I
    See? I can do it when I put my mind to it!
SIGN    Is it yummy, Al-Al?
SIGN    A... Al-Al?!
[07:45] Dorothea
    Cut, cut!
[07:49] Dorothea
    It was going so well...
[07:52] Charlotte
    Allen, are you okay?
[07:55] Allen
    Hey, Dorothea.
[07:56] Allen
    What the heck is Al-Al, huh?!
[07:59] Dorothea
    You're supposed to be newlyweds,
[08:01] Dorothea
    so it's normal to have
    nicknames for each other.
[08:04] Dorothea
    By the way, Miss Charlotte's
    nickname is Charly.
[08:07] Allen
    Charly?!
[08:10] Allen
    Well, whatever.
[08:11] Allen
    If this is really going to help
    you with your next book...
[08:15] Dorothea
    Of course it does!
[08:17] Allen/I
    It only looks like she's having
    fun toying with us...
[08:21] Dorothea
    That's enough for the newlyweds
    setting, so let's move on!
[08:25] Dorothea
    Next is the school-life situation!
[08:28] Allen
    We're not done yet?
[08:31] Dorothea
    Oh, there are other characters
    besides the two of you though.
[08:35] Dorothea
    Who can we cast...?
[08:38] Gosetsu
    If I may be so bold, I
    would take on a role.
[08:45] Gosetsu
    How about this?
[08:48] Dorothea
    I mean, I didn't know you
    were a female, Miss Gosetsu.
[08:52] Gosetsu
    That's your reaction?
[08:53] Dorothea
    But you're perfect for the role!
[08:56] Lü
    I want in, too!
[08:57] Dorothea
    Okay!
[08:58] Dorothea
    Are you ready?
[09:00] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
[09:03] Dorothea/I
    A lone-wolf punk, Allen Crawford.
[09:07] Dorothea/I
    One day, his childhood friend, Charlotte,
    gets kidnapped by thugs.
[09:11] Dorothea/I
    To rescue her, Allen enters enemy territory all alone.
SIGN    Are you okay, Charlotte?
SIGN    Allen!
SIGN    You're here.
SIGN    Give Charlotte back.
SIGN    If you want this woman back, try and take her by force!
SIGN    You'll regret it.
SIGN    Let's see what you've got!
SIGN    There!
SIGN    Looks like you've got some backbone like the rumors said.
SIGN    Come join us.
SIGN    No, thank you!
SIGN    Are you sure?
SIGN    You don't care what happens to that girl?
SIGN    What?
SIGN    Try laying even one finger on Charlotte.
SIGN    I'll grind you to pieces!
SIGN    Huh?
SIGN    What power...
SIGN    As expected from Allen...
SIGN    Are you okay, Charlotte?
SIGN    I'm sorry, this is all my fault...
SIGN    Sorry, I didn't mean to fight.
SIGN    No, you did it to help me.
[10:45] (Flashback) Charlotte
    I'd never be scared of you.
[10:49] (Flashback) Allen
    A woman...
[10:53] (Flashback) Allen
    A woman who's precious to me.
[10:57] Allen/I
    It takes me back.
[10:59] Allen/I
    Something similar happened when
    she got caught up with those thugs.
SIGN    I'll go wet a handkerchief.
[11:05] Allen/I
    Shoot!
[11:06] [SONG] Allen/I
    I'm supposed to chase after her in the script.
SIGN    Hold on!
SIGN    What's the matter?
[11:16] Allen/I
    And here, I'm supposed to do a Kabe-don,
    then an Ago-kui, into a Kata-zun...
[11:20] Allen/I
    What do these words even mean*?!
[11:21] Allen/I
    I've never heard of them before!
[11:23] Allen/I
    "Kabe" means wall, so I guess I'm*
    supposed to put my hands against the wall?
SIGN    Oh no, it's just...
[11:34] Allen/I
    It's happening again.
SIGN    When I look at Charlotte, sometimes my heart leaps.
SIGN    Her every gesture and behavior stirs up my heart.
[11:46] Allen/I
    Could it be possible that I...?
SIGN    Allen... Who is that woman to you?
SIGN    Storming right into enemy territory for her, that's something!
[11:59] Allen/I
    Charlotte, to me, is...
[12:02] Allen/I
    This is a performance.
[12:04] Allen/I
    I'm not telling her how I feel.
[12:06] Allen/I
    So...
SIGN    I'm... I'm her...
SIGN    Guardian!
SIGN    I need to be by her side and look out for her!
[12:19] Dorothea
    Cut, cut!
[12:20] Dorothea
    Excuse me?! Did I say you
    could go off script?
[12:23] Dorothea
    That's where you go, "She
    is a part of my heart"!
[12:28] Allen
    I improvised.
[12:29] Allen
    I changed it because I
    thought that was better.
[12:32] Dorothea
    Why do I feel like you're
    doing some fast talking...
[12:36] Dorothea
    Oh well, whatever!
[12:42] Allen/I
    Charlotte is sweet and gentle.
[12:44] Allen/I
    If I tell her how I feel, she'd feel
    obliged to reciprocate my feelings.
[12:50] Allen/I
    That is beyond naughty.
[12:53] Sign
    I'm Giving the Disgraced Noble Lady I
    Rescued a Crash Course in Naughtiness
[12:56] Sign
    I'm Giving the Disgraced Noble Lady I
    Rescued a Crash Course in Naughtiness
[13:00] Dorothea
    Next, you'll be doing a Cinderella story.
[13:03] Allen
    We're not done yet?
[13:04] Dorothea
    Of course not!
[13:06] Allen
    I'm getting tired.
[13:08] Allen
    Charlotte, can you tell Dorothea as well?
[13:11] Charlotte
    I'm actually having fun.
[13:13] Charlotte
    But if you're tired, we could call it a day.
[13:16] Allen
    This isn't enough to make me tired!
[13:18] Allen
    I can keep going!
[13:20] Charlotte
    Thank you!
[13:22] Charlotte
    Dorothea, am I doing it correctly?
[13:26] Charlotte
    I've never acted before.
[13:28] Dorothea
    Miss Charlotte, you're perfect!
[13:31] Charlotte
    Thank you!
[13:32] Dorothea
    Here's your next script.
[13:35] Dorothea
    Mister Allen will be playing
    a prince on a white horse,
[13:38] Dorothea
    and Miss Charlotte will be a
    mistreated, unfortunate princess.
[13:43] Dorothea
    And the mean stepmother will be Gosetsu—
[13:46] Lü
    What about me?
[13:48] Dorothea
    I have the perfect role for you!
[13:51] Lü
    Yay!
[13:53] Dorothea
    Now that it's cast, let's roll!
[13:56] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
[13:59] Dorothea/I
    Charlotte is the daughter of a mistress,
[14:01] Dorothea/I
    and has been mistreated
    by her stepmother every day.
[14:06] Charlotte/I
    This reminds me of my past.
[14:09] Charlotte/I
    Before I came to Allen's place,
SIGN    my daily routine was to clean the Duke's mansion...
SIGN    I still see some dust.
SIGN    Do it all over again, Charlotte!
SIGN    I'm so sorry, Mother.
SIGN    No matter.
SIGN    By the way, we received a invitation for a ball from the kingdom.
SIGN    But I expect you to finish cleaning \this place by the time I come home.
SIGN    Yes, Mother.
SIGN    I can't keep on living like this.
SIGN    Why should I suffer like this?!
SIGN    Wh-Who are you?
SIGN    I'm a sorcerer.
SIGN    Poor dear, I'll take you to the ball.
SIGN    Here!
SIGN    Wow, it's beautiful!
SIGN    Now, let us go!
SIGN    I disobeyed Mother to be here.
SIGN    Should a person like me be at the ball?
SIGN    Why is she here?!
SIGN    No way!
SIGN    Is that... the prince?!
SIGN    You look beautiful.
SIGN    Th-Thank you.
[15:55] Charlotte/I
    Allen looks gorgeous in a prince's outfit.
SIGN    If... you don't mind, would you dance with me?
SIGN    But I've never danced before...
SIGN    What a coincidence.
SIGN    Neither have I.
SIGN    Come on, let's dance.
SIGN    Y-Yes.
SIGN    Lift your chin up.
SIGN    It's easier to stay in sync that way.
SIGN    O-Okay...
[16:37] Charlotte/I
    Somehow...
[16:41] Charlotte/I
    My heart is pounding.
[16:47] Charlotte/I
    When I'm with Allen, I...
[16:53] Dorothea
    Cut!
[16:58] Dorothea
    Miss Charlotte, you were a perfect princess!
[17:01] Charlotte
    Thank you.
[17:03] Dorothea
    Mister Allen, you were okay.
[17:05] Allen
    How so?!
[17:06] Allen
    I did my best!
[17:08] Lü
    Mommy, have some water.
[17:10] Gosetsu
    Great work.
[17:11] Charlotte
    Thank you.
[17:15] Gosetsu
    As expected of Lady Charlotte.
    It was a masterful performance.
[17:18] Charlotte
    That's an overstatement.
[17:21] Allen
    Lü, give me some water as well.
[17:24] Lü
    Humph!
[17:25] Allen
    You...!
[17:27] Charlotte
    Allen, you can have some of mine.
[17:33] Allen
    No... thank you.
[17:36] Dorothea
    Are you ready for the final scene?
[17:39] Dorothea
    Here's how it goes.
[17:41] Dorothea
    Miss Charlotte goes back to her normal life.
[17:44] Dorothea
    She tries to forget about that one
    sweet night with the prince,
[17:48] Dorothea
    but the prince comes looking for her.
[17:52] Allen
    Anything wrong?
[17:53] Charlotte
    No... it's nothing.
[17:56] Charlotte/I
    What am I thinking...?
[17:58] Charlotte/I
    Unconsciously, I'm following
    Allen with my eyes.
[18:02] Charlotte/I
    I have to get it together.
[18:04] Dorothea
    Let's do the final scene!
[18:06] Dorothea
    Ready, action!
SIGN    Has anyone here lost their hair ornament?
SIGN    That must be mine.
SIGN    Ha, you dummy!
SIGN    I'm looking for a girl whose eyes match this hair ornament!
SIGN    Could it be?
SIGN    It's the same color.
SIGN    Y-You are...?
SIGN    I'm the prince of this kingdom.
SIGN    I've come to take you back with me.
SIGN    Someone like me has no right to be by your side.
SIGN    Because I'm the child of a mistress and everyone hates me...
SIGN    That doesn't matter.
SIGN    No, I'm certain that I will cause you trouble.
SIGN    So...
SIGN    It's all right.
SIGN    I won't let go of your hand.
SIGN    I swear I'll protect you!
SIGN    So come with me.
[19:08] Charlotte
    Allen really has always protected me.
[19:12] Charlotte
    But why?
SIGN    Um... how do you... feel about me?
[19:18] Allen/I
    Huh? She's improvising?
[19:22] Allen/I
    I must... answer truthfully!
[19:26] Allen/I
    How do I feel about Charlotte?
SIGN    Charlotte, th-the truth is, I...
[19:40] Allen
    Wh-What was that?!
[19:52] Yor
    I came here after feeling
    the presence of someone.
[19:54] Allen
    Huh?
[19:56] Yor
    Please excuse my sudden visit.
[20:05] Yor
    It's been a while, Miss Dorothea.
[20:08] Dorothea
    Help!
[20:10] Yor
    You're not going anywhere.
[20:13] Yor
    Who could have imagined you'd disappear
    the day after I asked for the draft...?
[20:18] Yor
    As your editor, that was the
    worst mistake of my life.
[20:21] Yor
    But you were here at your
    house all this time.
[20:25] Dorothea
    The basement I barricaded
    myself in was sealed heavily.
[20:28] Dorothea
    So not even a masterful expert
    could have detected my presence!
[20:33] Dorothea
    Amazing, huh?
[20:34] Yor
    If only you could channel
    that energy into your writing,
[20:38] Yor
    I wouldn't have had to waste 30 years of my life.
[20:42] Dorothea
    I'm so sorry!
[20:46] Yor
    I apologize for the trouble we've caused.
[20:48] Yor
    This is to cover the cost of repairing your wall.
[20:50] Yor
    Please take it.
SIGN    WIGGLE
SIGN    WIGGLE
[20:51] Allen
    Right...
[20:54] Yor
    Please excuse us.
[20:55] Dorothea
    Help me, Mister Allen!
[20:57] Dorothea
    He's going to sink me into the ocean!
[20:59] Yor
    What are you talking about?
[21:01] Yor
    Why on earth would I do that
    to my precious author?
[21:05] Dorothea
    Are you sure?
[21:07] Yor
    The ocean would be too lenient.
[21:09] Yor
    Let's start with a volcanic crater.
[21:12] Dorothea
    I'll die!
[21:13] Dorothea
    Even though I'm an elf, magma would kill me!
[21:15] Yor
    Shouldn't an author value any experience?
[21:21] Dorothea
    How am I supposed to use a near-death
    experience at a crater for a romance novel?!
[21:26] Charlotte
    E-Excuse me...?
[21:28] Charlotte
    Allen, if you could...
SIGN    PHEW
[21:31] Allen
    Oh! S-Sorry!
[21:33] Charlotte
    It's all right.
[21:35] Charlotte
    Um, Allen? What were you
    trying to say earlier?
[21:40] Allen
    Huh?
[21:43] Charlotte
    P-Please forget I asked.
[21:46] Eruca
    Bro, we've got a problem!
[21:49] Allen
    What happened?!
[21:50] Eruca
    Listen, Charlotte's little
    sister is in trouble!
[21:55] Charlotte
    Natalia is...?
[23:30] Charlotte
    Al-Al?
[23:31] Allen
    What is it, Charly?
[23:33] Charlotte
    Next time is, "Naughty
    Visit to the Parents."
[23:34] Sign
    Next Episode
[23:34] Sign
    Naughty Visit to the Parents
[23:37] Allen
    It makes me nervous, Charly.