2 - The Definition of a Baseball Fan / No! Never! / The Head Scarf of Innocence

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[01:31] sign
    The Definition of a Baseball Fan
[01:37] Taki
    My name is Takino Yuki.
[01:39] Taki
    Despite appearances,
    I used to be a TV announcer.
[01:42] Taki
    I'm taking the Keiyo Line train at 5 PM.
[01:45] Taki
    I'm very annoyed.
[01:48] sign
    Local for Kaihin-Makuhari
[01:49] Yuki
    You see, the closer the train
    gets to Kaihin-Makuhari
[01:51] Yuki
    the more it fills up with people I hate.
[01:56] Yuki
    Decked out in their hats and uniforms.
[02:00] Yuki
    Cheer paraphernalia sticking out of their bags.
[02:07] Yuki
    I knew it! That's the rhythm of a cheer!
[02:16] Yuki
    I'm surrounded by baseball fans!
[02:19] Yuki
    It's maddening!
[02:24] Ruriko
    Iwakawa's new pitching stance pays off.
[02:28] Ruriko
    Three straight HQS...
[02:32] Ruriko
    What's an HQS?
[02:33] sign
    A statistic that indicates a good pitching performance.
[02:35] Yuki
    Even that gyaru?!
[02:39] Yuki
    What kind of young person
    reads a sports paper on a train?!
[02:43] Yuki
    This is why I hate baseball fans!
[02:46] Announcer
    Next stop, Kaihin-Makuhari. Kaihin-Makuhari.
[02:50] Announcer
    The doors on the right side will open.
[02:53] Yuki
    All that said...
[02:55] Yuki
    I'm heading to the stadium, too.
[03:01] Yuki
    But I have a reason for it.
[03:06] Yuki
    Wearing a number one jersey...
[03:08] Yuki
    Kojiro's uniform.
[03:12] sign
    Shishio
[03:12] Girl A
    Shishio!
[03:14] Girl B
    Go!
[03:18] Yuki
    Honestly.
[03:20] Yuki
    Young women these days are all into Shishio.
[03:24] Yuki
    While my dearest Kojiro
    earns no female attention!
[03:31] Ruriko
    Would anyone like anything?
[03:33] Ruriko
    How about a Hyper Dry?
[03:39] Yuki
    Maybe I'll get a beer.
[03:41] Yuki
    Excuse me!
[03:45] Ruriko
    Hey, thanks!
[03:47] Yuki
    The gyaru who was reading that sports paper?
[03:49] Yuki
    She's a vendor here?!
[03:54] Ruriko
    Hey, I know that uniform! It's Kojiro's!
[03:57] Yuki
    W-Well... Do you like Kojiro?
[04:02] Yuki
    He's a good player, isn't he?
[04:05] Yuki
    I'll take a beer.
[04:06] Ruriko
    Thanks!
[04:07] Ruriko
    I don't see many young women
    in Kojiro gear, y'know?
[04:11] Ruriko
    You're a pretty rare breed!
[04:15] Yuki
    No female attention at all!
[04:18] Yuki
    Though I appreciate being
    called a young woman...
[04:26] Yuki
    Why, you ask, am I so fixated on Kojiro?
[04:32] Yuki
    Why do I come to the ballpark
    despite hating it so much?
[04:38] Yuki
    The reason is...
[04:40] Nagisa
    Batting seventh: right fielder, Kojiro.
[04:44] Nagisa
    Uniform number one.
[04:47] Yuki
    Because I'm his wife!
[04:50] Yuki
    I don't want to hear that he got into
    a hitting slump because he got married!
[04:55] Yuki
    It's his second time at bat today.
[04:57] Yuki
    Two outs, runners on first and second.
[04:58] Yuki
    It's a dramatic time for an at-bat!
[05:03] Oldie A
    Damn. Does it have to be Kojiro?
[05:05] Oldie A
    Send in a pinch hitter!
[05:07] Oldie A
    We won't score any runs with that sub-200 hack!
[05:11] Oldie A
    Why do they even keep playing that old-timer?
[05:14] Oldie A
    He's 35 years old, damn it!
[05:17] Oldie B
    His last at-bat was a pathetic flyout to right!
[05:20] Oldie B
    He needs to get it together!
[05:22] Yuki
    This is why I hate baseball fans!
[05:26] Oldie A
    He's getting in the way of
    developing the young core!
[05:29] Oldie B
    Maybe he'll walk after this year!
[05:31] Oldie A
    Not like any other team would take him.
[05:34] Oldie A
    But could he even make a living if he retired?
[05:37] Oldie B
    Good point!
[05:41] Yuki
    I can't take it anymore!
[05:44] Yuki
    Hey, armchair commentators!
[05:47] Yuki
    Wouldn't a real fan look
    for a player's good points?!
[05:53] Yuki
    You've been talking trash this
    whole time! I heard you, asshole!
[05:58] Oldie A
    Wh-What's your problem?
    It's all true, isn't it?
[06:04] Yuki
    Then wouldn't a real fan be
    clapping their hands to support him?!
[06:11] Yuki
    Hey, vendor girl! You agree, don't you?!
[06:16] Ruriko
    H-Huh? Me?
[06:19] Ruriko
    Um...
[06:26] Ruriko
    Kojiro's running a 120 wRC+!
[06:31] Oldie A
    Huh? A what?
[06:33] Ruriko
    It means...
[06:36] Ruriko
    Kojiro's still got it!
[06:46] Announcer
    Kojiro hits a go-ahead three-run blast!
[06:48] Yuki
    Hell yeah!
[06:50] Oldie A
    He really did it!
[06:52] Oldie B
    I can't believe it!
[06:55] Ruriko
    Awesome!
[06:56] Yuki
    Kojiro!
[06:58] Oldie A/B
    Kojiro!
[07:06] Yuki
    Sorry for dragging you into this.
[07:08] Yuki
    Can I buy another to make it up to you?
[07:12] Ruriko
    That's not really necessary...
[07:14] Oldie A
    I'll buy from you, too!
[07:16] Oldie B
    Me, too!
[07:17] Ruriko
    Gosh, thanks!
[07:21] Ruriko
    Although...
[07:23] (Flashback) Murata
    All right, here we go!
[07:25] (Flashback) Murata
    The veteran player with
    over 200 career home runs!
[07:28] (Flashback) Murata
    And he's currently running a 120 wRC+!
[07:33] Ruriko
    What the heck is a wRC+?
[07:44] Yuki
    You're about to take a shower?
[07:46] Yuki
    Sorry to call when you're busy.
[07:49] Yuki
    Yes, I saw!
[07:51] Yuki
    It's no wonder you have a 120 wRC+!
[07:54] Yuki
    What? I don't really know,
    but you were amazing!
[07:59] Yuki
    Great work today!
    Take care on your way home!
[08:03] sign
    Kojiro
[08:05] Yuki
    When I sat in the VIP seats, it was always
    awkward when Kojiro didn't get a hit,
[08:10] Yuki
    so I decided to try regular seating
    for the first time in a while.
[08:20] Yuki
    I suppose it's nice to change
    things up now and then.
[08:25] sign
    Authorized Personnel Only
[08:25] sign
    Staff Waiting Room
[08:34] Nakaizumi
    Look at you, Ruriko!
    You're reading a sports paper?
[08:38] Ruriko
    Hey, Mr. Nakaizumi. Good work today!
[08:41] Nakaizumi
    It's important for a vendor to know the game.
[08:45] Nakaizumi
    Any fun stories today?
[08:49] Ruriko
    Oh, yeah! This one was really funny!
[08:52] sign
    I figured out
    how to get 100 runs
    in three innings!
[08:53] Ruriko
    "I figured out how to get
    100 runs in three innings!"
[08:56] sign
    Hit a home run
    in the bottom of the first!
[08:56] sign
    Crack!
[08:57] Ruriko
    "Hit a home run in the
    bottom of the first! Crack!"
[09:00] sign
    Then one-two-three innings
    in the second and third!
[09:00] sign
    Out!
[09:00] Ruriko
    "Then one-two-three innings
    in the second and third! Out!"
[09:04] sign
    But you're losing!
    See? It says 100!
[09:05] Ruriko
    "See? It says 100! But you're losing!"
[09:12] Nakaizumi
    That's just the comic strip!
[09:16] Ruriko
    Baseball's hard.
[09:25] sign
    90 Minutes Before the Chiba MotorSuns Play
[09:29] sign
    Women's Changing Room
[09:29] sign
    No! Never!
[09:30] Sara
    Hey, guys! Do you mind if I ask some advice?
[09:34] Sara
    I still don't know what to do
    when a customer hits on me.
[09:38] sign
    1 Year as a Vendor
     Sara (High Schooler, Age 17)
[09:39] Sara
    What do you do when someone
    asks for your contact info?
[09:42] Kokoro
    I hear you.
[09:43] sign
    4 Years as a Vendor
     Kokoro (Part-Timer, Age 22)
[09:44] Kokoro
    I struggled with that at first, too.
[09:46] Kokoro
    These days, I guess I just laugh it off.
[09:49] Aona
    Give them your Ninsta account
    instead of your number.
[09:54] Aona
    It'll boost your follower count, too.
[09:54] sign
    4 Years as a Vendor
     Aona (College Student, Age 22)
[09:56] Aona
    Right, Kohinata?
[09:57] Kohinata
    Well, yeah...
[09:58] sign
    10 Years as a Vendor
     Kohinata (Office Worker, Age 29)
[09:59] Kohinata
    But getting a high follower account
    isn't all there is to Ninsta.
[10:05] sign
    Whoops! Ordered a large!
[10:06] Kohinata
    Post meals you've had now and then.
[10:10] Kohinata
    It'll give you things to talk about
    with regulars who follow you!
[10:14] (Flashback) Customer A
    I went to that restaurant you mentioned!
[10:17] (Flashback) Kohinata
    Isn't the food there delicious?
[10:21] Sara/Kokoro/Aona
    A pro!
[10:22] Sara
    You're amazing, Kohinata!
[10:24] Kokoro
    I wanna be just like you!
[10:26] Ruriko
    They all get guests hitting on them?
[10:26] sign
    1 Week as a Vendor
     Ruriko (Age 20)
[10:29] Sara
    So, Aona, did you start
    dating Omatsu, the checker?
[10:34] Kokoro
    I wondered that, too!
[10:38] Aona
    You figured it out?
[10:39] Aona
    Yeah, finally. I was waiting forever!
[10:42] Kohinata
    Hey, congrats!
[10:44] Kohinata
    Just don't get too lovey-dovey in public.
[10:47] Aona
    We're not going to!
[10:50] Ruriko
    No one's hit on me...
[10:54] Aona
    Have you had any guys who just
    won't take a hint, Ruriko?
[10:57] Aona
    You okay?
[11:02] Ruriko
    Yeah... This one guy hit on me recently.
[11:07] (Flashback) Murata
    We all have different ways
    of rooting for people.
[11:13] Ruriko
    Boy, did that catch me off-guard!
[11:16] Kohinata
    Maybe you should use your Ninsta, too.
[11:19] Kokoro
    I might start doing that, too.
[11:22] Ruriko
    Ninsta?
[11:24] Ruriko
    Yeah, of course!
[11:25] Aona
    Ruriko, give me your account info later.
[11:28] Kohinata
    Yeah, and me, too.
[11:29] Kokoro
    Same!
[11:30] Sara
    Share it with me, too, please!
[11:32] Ruriko
    Sure thing!
[11:35] Ruriko
    Hey, could you go to the meeting without me?
[11:38] Ruriko
    I'll catch up in a bit.
[11:39] Aona
    Okay.
[11:50] Ruriko
    How do I make a Ninsta account?
[11:53] Ruriko
    I'm so lousy with this stuff...
[11:57] sign
    Incompetent with
    social media
[12:00] sign
    Authorized Personnel Only
[12:00] sign
    Staff Waiting Room
[12:01] Ruriko
    What the heck?!
[12:04] Nakaizumi
    Okay, all, let's start the meeting.
[12:08] Nakaizumi
    I'm sure you've heard rumors
    about this here and there,
[12:11] Nakaizumi
    but lately we've had some triple-three
    sleaze balls hitting on the female staff!
[12:17] Nakaizumi
    I'm pretty sure you know this, but
    never give personal info to a customer.
[12:25] Nakaizumi
    You never know when someone
    might use it to stalk you.
[12:29] Nakaizumi
    We checkers will keep a closer eye out, too,
[12:33] Nakaizumi
    but try to keep customer
    interactions brief and neutral.
[12:38] Nakaizumi
    Are you listening, Ruriko?!
[12:42] Ruriko
    Y-Yeah!
[12:43] Ruriko
    Personal info, no! Never!
[12:47] Ruriko
    Damn it! I never figured out
    how to make an account!
[12:52] Ruriko
    Stupid Ninsta...
[13:00] Hige
    Man, you can't beat the ballpark!
[13:03] Gori
    Let's get to work!
[13:04] Fujinami
    What vendor girls will we see tonight?
[13:08] Guys
    I might just go out on a limb!
[13:10] Guys
    Maybe that cutie from last time...
[13:13] Ruriko
    Triple-three sleaze balls...
[13:15] Ruriko
    I guess that's what they meant.
[13:17] Hige
    Hey, vendor girl! C'mere, little lady!
[13:20] Fujinami
    We'll take some beers!
[13:22] Gori
    Three of 'em!
[13:25] Ruriko
    Three beers will be 2,100 yen.
[13:28] Hige
    Dang, you've got it going on!
[13:30] Hige
    What's your name?
[13:31] sign
    Ruriko
[13:32] Hige
    Ruriko, huh?
[13:34] Fujinami
    How old are you, cutie?
[13:35] Gori
    I'm getting you on video!
[13:39] Ruriko
    Personal info, no! Never!
[13:42] Hige
    So, li'l miss Ruriko.
[13:44] Hige
    How's about you give me your number?
[13:47] Ruriko
    Sorry. It's against the rules to give that out.
[13:50] Ruriko
    No. Never.
[13:53] Gori
    What area d'you live in?
[13:54] Gori
    Maybe we can grab a drink sometime.
[13:56] Ruriko
    The city.
[13:58] Ruriko
    No. Never!
[14:00] Fujinami
    What're you into?
[14:02] Fujinami
    You in college?
[14:04] Ruriko
    What do you think?
[14:05] Ruriko
    No! Never!
[14:07] Hige
    Y-You seem pretty mature.
[14:10] Hige
    Bet you've got a little brother or sister!
[14:13] Ruriko
    I think I've got a little brother... or sister?
[14:16] Ruriko
    Maybe... or maybe not?
[14:18] Ruriko
    No! Never!
[14:20] Gori
    C'mon, don't be so defensive!
[14:23] Gori
    You got a boyfriend?
[14:25] Ruriko
    I'm all alone in this world.
[14:29] Ruriko
    No! Never!
[14:31] Fujinami
    All alone? You've got family, right?
[14:35] Ruriko
    Yeah, I got a phone call
    from my grandpa yesterday.
[14:39] Ruriko
    Hideaki, 65 years old.
[14:41] Ruriko
    I can probably tell them that.
[14:44] Fujinami
    She finally tells us something...
[14:48] Trio
    Our only info on Ruriko: Grandfather, Hideaki.
[14:52] Hige
    Fine, we get it.
[14:55] Hige
    At least give us your Ninsta.
    Then we'll drop it.
[14:59] Ruriko
    Ninsta?
[15:01] Ruriko
    Nin... sta...
[15:05] Ruriko
    Ninsta!
[15:07] Ruriko
    I don't know how to get a stupid account, okay?!
[15:10] Ruriko
    I'll let you be my first followers if you'll
    just teach me how it freaking works!
[15:17] Hige
    Sure.
[15:18] Fujinami
    If you like...
[15:20] Hige
    First, you have to download the app.
[15:23] Hige
    Did they send you a code when you put in
    your phone number or email address?
[15:27] Ruriko
    I don't know what any of that crap means!
[15:29] Hige
    Seriously?!
[15:30] Hige
    Er, sorry. A code is...
[15:34] Old Man
    What an entertaining young lady.
[15:39] Old Man
    The ballpark never gets boring, does it?
[15:48] sign
    I met the funniest
[15:48] sign
    vendor girl!
[15:48] sign
    I'm going to get to know her lolol
[15:48] Ruriko
    Just teach me how it freaking works!
[15:52] sign
    15,000 retweets
[15:52] sign
    40,000 likes
[15:53] Ruriko
    I've gone viral.
[15:56] Ruriko
    Ninsta! Ninsta!
[15:56] sign
    She got her account.
[16:02] Natsuno
    Two years ago, when I was
    in my third year of high school,
[16:06] Natsuno
    I, Yamada Natsuno,
    came to the ballpark with a friend...
[16:12] Natsuno
    and fell in love with the beer vendor girls!
[16:14] (Flashback) Vendor
    Would anyone like a beer?
[16:16] Natsuno
    Their beaming smiles,
    the flowers in their hair...
[16:20] Natsuno
    And their cute uniforms!
[16:23] Natsuno
    They were like idols to me.
[16:29] sign
    Meal Packs & Snacks
SIGN    The Head Scarf of Innocence
[16:31] Natsuno
    Here you are!
[16:33] Natsuno
    One standard meal pack!
[16:36] Natsuno
    Thank you for coming!
[16:36] sign
    Chiba MotorSuns Stadium Concourse
     Concessions Staff for "Atsumori"
     Yamada Natsuno (College Student, Age 20)
[16:39] Natsuno
    Why, then, am I selling food with a scarf
    over my hair instead of a flower?
[16:40] Natsuno
    Thank you for coming!
[16:47] Natsuno
    I applied for part-time jobs at the ballpark
[16:50] Natsuno
    and somehow got roped into working here.
[16:52] (Flashback) Manager
    Well, see you for your first day tomorrow!
[16:56] sign
    Yamada
[16:57] Natsuno
    Where did it all go wrong?
[17:05] Natsuno
    A vendor girl...
[17:07] Natsuno
    I wish I could wear their uniform...
[17:12] Natsuno
    I-I wanna show my legs, too!
[17:15] Natsuno
    My legs... My legs...
[17:18] Natsuno
    They're pretty nice, okay?!
[17:21] Natsuno
    Oh, how did I end up here?!
[17:25] Murata
    Er... one mega-portion
    ultra meal pack, please.
[17:28] Natsuno
    Thank you for coming!
[17:30] Natsuno
    One mega-portion!
[17:32] Natsuno
    Oh, whatever shall I do?!
[17:36] Yuki
    Tripe stew, please.
[17:38] Natsuno
    One tripe stew! Here you are!
[17:41] Natsuno
    Oh, cruel fate!
[17:44] Miku
    One nori meal, please!
[17:47] Natsuno
    Yes, one nori meal!
[17:49] Natsuno
    And two sets of chopsticks!
[17:52] Natsuno
    Th-Three hundred yen is your change!
[17:57] Narrator
    Two years had passed without anyone seeing
    Yamada Natsuno's (in her words) beautiful legs.
[18:06] sign
    Meal Packs & Snacks
[18:06] Customer B
    Hey, Yamada!
[18:08] Natsuno
    Hello.
[18:09] Customer B
    Could I get some fried chicken?
[18:11] Natsuno
    Coming right up!
[18:13] Customer B
    Hey, you've sold a lot of stock today!
[18:16] Natsuno
    Thanks for noticing.
[18:17] Natsuno
    We're past the rush, I think.
[18:20] Natsuno
    We got a huge wave after
    they tied it up in the fifth.
[18:24] Customer B
    Shishio's on fire, right?
[18:27] Customer B
    Three hits and three RBIs!
[18:29] Natsuno
    Here you are.
[18:30] Customer B
    Thanks.
[18:32] Customer B
    See you later. Good luck!
[18:34] Natsuno
    Thanks! Come again!
[18:38] Manager
    Yamada.
[18:39] Natsuno
    Hey, Mr. Manager.
[18:41] Manager
    You seem a little down.
[18:44] Manager
    Are you all right?
[18:45] Natsuno
    No, I feel just fine!
[18:50] Manager
    I've been thinking.
[18:52] Manager
    Contract negotiations aren't just for players.
[18:56] Natsuno
    Sorry?
[18:58] Manager
    I'm raising your hourly pay 100 yen!
[19:04] Natsuno
    Th-Thank you, sir...
[19:09] Natsuno
    I got a raise!
[19:12] Manager
    You're such a hard worker.
    It's so great to see!
[19:17] Natsuno
    Me and my stupid work ethic!
[19:19] Natsuno
    I'm such a sucker!
[19:23] Murata
    Excuse me.
[19:25] Natsuno
    Welcome!
[19:27] Murata
    Do you have any fried chicken left?
[19:30] Natsuno
    Sure. One fried chicken...
[19:34] Natsuno
    Thank you for coming.
[19:37] Murata
    Hey...
[19:39] Murata
    You look under the weather.
[19:41] Murata
    Are you all right?
[19:44] Murata
    O-Oh, er... N-Nothing...
[19:48] Murata
    B-Bye.
[19:53] Murata
    I-I always enjoy the food here.
[19:59] Natsuno
    Just now... he was kind of
    like Prince Charming!
[20:03] Murata
    I would enjoy stealing your heart, as well.
[20:08] Natsuno
    Knock that off. Don't think that way, silly!
[20:11] Natsuno
    It doesn't mean anything!
[20:13] Manager
    Yamada.
[20:15] Manager
    Are you sure you're all right?
    You're not sick or something?
[20:19] Natsuno
    I-It was the rush, that's all.
    I might be overheated.
[20:25] Manager
    I've been thinking.
[20:26] Manager
    Jobs are like fielding positions.
    You have to find the one you're cut out for.
[20:32] Natsuno
    Sorry?
[20:34] Manager
    I was thinking of making you shift leader!
[20:44] Natsuno
    I'm getting a promotion!
[20:49] Manager
    I always feel so much better
    knowing you're on the job.
[20:54] Natsuno
    Glad to hear it...
[20:59] sign
    Closed
[21:01] Natsuno
    There we go.
[21:03] Sara
    I think we all sold a lot today!
[21:05] Kokoro
    Yeah, tons of parties in the
    first and third base seats.
[21:16] Natsuno
    Head scarf and long pants...
[21:19] Natsuno
    Will this be how I spend my college life?
[21:23] Miku
    Hey, miss!
[21:26] Miku
    We ate the whole meal you gave us!
[21:29] Miku
    We'll come back again!
[21:32] Natsuno
    R-Right.
[21:35] Natsuno
    She'll come back again, huh?
[21:45] Natsuno
    I might not get a flower in my hair,
    and I can't show my legs, either...
[21:50] Natsuno
    But maybe I'll stick around a little longer!
[21:53] Manager
    Yamada!
[21:55] Manager
    I'll be hiring a graduate next year!
    You want that to be you?
[22:00] Natsuno
    O-Oh, well... I...
[22:03] Natsuno
    Um... I'll think about it!
[23:44] sign
    Next Time
[23:44] sign
    m 0 0 l 230 0 l 230 215 l 0 215
[23:44] sign
    "The Goddess of Baseball?"
[23:44] sign
    m 0 0 l 230 0 l 230 215 l 0 215
[23:44] sign
    "The Invincible Mascot"
[23:44] sign
    m 0 0 l 230 0 l 230 215 l 0 215
[23:44] sign
    "Rah! Rah! Rah!"