E2 - You Shall Not Pass, Tatami-chan

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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    The House Spirit
    Tatami-chan
SIGN    Episode 2: "You Shall Not Pass, Tatami-chan"
[00:04] Narrator
    In the human world,
    people flow in a certain way.
[00:09] Narrator
    The city has its own flow, as well.
[00:12] Narrator
    Going against that flow is strongly frowned
    upon, and can put your life in danger.
[00:17] Narrator
    Huh. Tatami-chan, who's only
    been in Tokyo for a week,
[00:23] Narrator
    seems to be confused at the station gate.
[00:25] Narrator
    What has her so confused?
[00:31] Tatami
    Yo, what is this? There's no place
    for me to put the ticket in.
[00:34] A
    Move, damn it!
[00:35] B
    You're in the way!
[00:36] C
    I'll smack you, wretched brat!
[00:38] Tatami
    Sheesh, I'm taking a lot of heat.
[00:44] Tatami
    I should be able to ride the train
    as long as I have this ticket.
[00:47] Tatami
    Why can't I go through?
[00:48] Tatami
    Why? Why? Why?
[00:50] Tatami
    Is it made so that only
    Tokyoites can go through?
[00:53] D
    Standing in the way...
[00:54] E
    I'm going to shove my fingers
    up your ass, moron!
[00:56] Tatami
    No, no, no, I can't take it!
[00:58] F
    Why are you hanging around here whining?
[01:01] Tatami
    I just want to ride the
    train with this ticket.
[01:04] Tatami
    There's no slot for the ticket
     on this machine.
[01:07] F
    You can't get through the ticket gate?
[01:09] Tatami
    Hey! You laughed!
[01:12] F
    Poor thing.
[01:13] F
    You must not be qualified
    to go through the gate.
[01:16] Tatami
    I need to be qualified
    to go through the gate?
[01:19] F
    The humans of Tokyo are exhausted
    by the concrete jungle.
[01:23] F
    You don't look exhausted enough.
[01:26] Tatami
    I have to be tired to go
    through the ticket gate?
[01:29] F
    You need to look like you're fed up
     and worn down by society.
[01:32] F
    Can you do it?
[01:33] Tatami
    Like this?
[01:34] F
    Hey, not bad.
[01:36] F
    Try it now.
[01:37] F
    You'll see the ticket slot now.
[01:40] Tatami
    Hey! I don't see the ticket slot!
[01:43] Tatami
    You lied to me!
[01:45] F
    Country bumpkins are so gullible.
[01:47] F
    Goodbye.
[01:48] Tatami
    Damn it, he was messing with me.
[01:49] Tatami
    I can't believe I'm getting screwed
    by this stupid ticket gate!
[01:52] Priest
    What are you doing, Tatami-chan?
[01:54] Tatami
    Tickling Priest.
[01:56] Tatami
    You came at a good time.
[01:57] Tatami
    This ticket gate won't take my ticket
     and I don't know what to do.
[02:01] Priest
    That's what's wrong?
    Take a good look.
[02:02] Priest
    There are two kinds of gates: one for
    pass cards and another for tickets.
[02:07] Tatami
    Wait, where?
[02:09] Tatami
    Wow, I never noticed.
[02:11] Priest
    Tatami-chan, tickets are passé.
[02:13] Priest
    Every Tokyoites has a pass card.
[02:16] Tatami
    I see.
[02:17] Tatami
    So that'll let me go through
    the ticket gates smoothly.
[02:21] Priest
    Look, you can buy a pass card
    from the station attendant over there.
[02:25] Tatami
    Thank you belly macho, Tickling Priest-san.
[02:27] Tatami
    Station attendant, one pass card please!
[02:30] Attendant
    One pass card, coming right up!
[02:32] Tatami
    I bought one.
[02:33] Priest
    Now touch your card against that panel
     and it will let you through.
[02:35] Tatami
    All right, let's give this a shot!
[02:38] Tatami
    Hey!
[02:39] G
    Keep your card loaded, dammit!
[02:39] H
    You're so freaking slow!
[02:41] Priest
    The passenger in front of you
    forgot to put money on his card.
[02:44] Tatami
    All right, once more!
[02:46] Tatami
    Jeez!
[02:47] I
    I'mma kill you!
[02:48] J
    Yo, do you not have money?
[02:49] Priest
    It happens.
[02:51] Priest
    It's annoying, huh?
[02:52] Tatami
    Again!
[02:53] Priest
    You're out of luck today.
[02:54] Tatami
    Damn it, guy, what the hell are you doing?
[02:57] Priest
    Don't do that, Tatami-chan.
[02:58] Priest
    You'll become just like
    the cranky Tokyoites.
[03:01] Tatami
    I can't get used to the
    flow of things in Tokyo.
[03:05] Priest
    All right, let's use brute force.
[03:07] Priest
    I'm going to tickle these people. Go!
[03:10] K
    What's up with this priest?
[03:12] Priest
    Tickle, tickle, tickle...
[03:13] K
    Stop, please!
[03:15] K
    Stop it!
[03:15] Tatami
    Thanks a lot, Tickling Priest!
[03:20] Tatami
    Woohoo! I can finally ride the trains!
[03:23] Tatami
    I'm a Tokyoite now!
[03:58] Machine
    Please reload your card.