E13 - Where To?

Source: Crunchyroll
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(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
SIGN    Where To?
[00:27] Odokawa
    "I love animals.
[00:29] Odokawa
    When I grow up, I want to work at the zoo.
[00:33] Odokawa
    That's because I don't like humans.
[00:36] Odokawa
    Being around humans makes me anxious.
[00:41] Odokawa
    I'm always told to look people
    in the eye when I talk to them,
[00:43] Odokawa
    but I'm too scared to do it.
[00:46] Odokawa
    I hate going to festivals where
    there are lots of people, too.
[00:50] Odokawa
    My classmates tease me,
    hit me, and laugh at me.
[00:56] Odokawa
    I'm not good at school or sports,
    so my teachers won't help me.
[01:01] Odokawa
    Even the teachers tease me.
[01:05] Odokawa
    When that happens, I can't stop the tears.
[01:08] Odokawa
    The harder I try to stop them,
    the more they keep coming.
[01:13] Odokawa
    It's so frustrating and embarrassing,
    I wish I could disappear.
[01:18] Odokawa
    When I cry out loud,
    my classmates laugh at me.
[01:22] Odokawa
    They say I'm like a walrus and laugh at me."
[01:28] Odokawa
    "I wish I were a walrus instead."
SIGN    I wish I were a walrus instead.
[01:34] Odokawa
    "My mom is the same way.
[01:36] Odokawa
    Since Dad never comes home, she's always
    annoyed and takes it out on me.
[01:41] Odokawa
    Every day she eats lots of food,
    and then she hits me and screams at me.
[01:46] Odokawa
    Unlike at school, I don't cry at home.
[01:50] Odokawa
    That's because my mom cries.
[01:53] Odokawa
    My dad's never home
    because he has a mistress.
[01:58] Odokawa
    When he does occasionally
    come home, he gets blind drunk.
[02:03] Odokawa
    That's my dad,
[02:05] Odokawa
    but he bought me an animal
    encyclopedia, so I like him okay.
SIGN    Animal Encyclopedia
[02:10] Odokawa
    I never got tired of looking
    at my animal encyclopedia.
[02:14] Odokawa
    I read lots of animal books at the library,
[02:16] Odokawa
    but I like this book
    my dad gave me the most."
[02:20] Odokawa
    "There's something else
    that I like, too. Cars.
[02:24] Odokawa
    I think it would be okay to get a job
    driving cars when I grow up, too.
[02:28] Odokawa
    On rare occasions, my dad
    takes me for a ride in his car.
[02:34] Odokawa
    I liked going on drives as a family,
[02:37] Odokawa
    but these days, my mom doesn't ride with us.
[02:40] Odokawa
    I think my dad doesn't bring my mom
    because he's going to see his mistress.
[02:46] Odokawa
    He tells me, 'Hiroshi, don't tell your
    mother,' and leaves me at the zoo.
[02:52] Odokawa
    I feel bad for my mom,
    but I loved my time at the zoo.
[02:58] Odokawa
    I couldn't look people in the eye, but I could
    stare into the eyes of animals forever.
[03:03] Odokawa
    I couldn't speak to people,
    but I could speak to animals.
[03:08] Odokawa
    I saw a walrus.
[03:11] Odokawa
    They make funny sounds
    and they're fat, just like me.
[03:16] Odokawa
    I thought they looked like my mom, too.
[03:21] Odokawa
    When I think about returning
    to reality with all its humans,
[03:26] Odokawa
    I'd rather stay here forever.
[03:41] Odokawa
    That's why that day, on the day
    of the accident, I...
SIGN    National Traffic Safety Campaign
[03:48] Mc
    The loser's bracket group
    that will be advancing to the finals
SIGN    Losers' Bracket
[03:51] Mc
    is entry number 1770, Rush Style!
[03:55] Entertainer
    Huh? What? Really?! Thank you!
[03:57] Entertainer
    We did it, Nozuyama-kun!
SIGN    N-1 Grand Prix
     2021 Losers' Bracket
[04:00] Entertainer
    I'm so happy. I'm already writing jokes.
[04:04] Audience B
    Apparently Donraku-san stepped down
    from the judge's panel.
[04:06] Audience A
    What else would he do? His daughter died.
[04:09] Mc
    How do you feel right now?
[04:09] Audience B
    Ma'am, can we change the channel?
[04:11] Entertainer
    We'll ride this wave all the way to—
SIGN    Live: Private Taxi Speeding Down Expressway
[04:19] Shirakawa
    Odokawa-san's not answering his phone.
[04:22] Goriki
    Where is that taxi?
[04:23] Shirakawa
    It's heading towards
    the harbor from Toranomon.
[04:27] Goriki
    Got it. I'll head there.
[04:29] Shirakawa
    Take me with you, Dr. Goriki.
[04:44] Shibagaki
    The other day, a high school listener
    was waiting for me to come outside.
[04:47] Shibagaki
    He asked me to team up with him.
[04:50] Shibagaki
    He must be disappointed after
    watching that loser's bracket.
[04:53] Shibagaki
    All we did was scream insults at each other.
[04:57] Shibagaki
    Hey, do you really want to split up?
[05:00] Baba
    You're the one who said we should split up
    if we didn't make it this year.
[05:04] Shibagaki
    We were so close.
[05:05] Shibagaki
    If we quit after I forgot our jokes,
    all I'd have left would be regrets.
[05:08] Shibagaki
    Next year will be our last year.
    Won't you reconsider?
[05:13] Shibagaki
    I need you.
[05:15] Shibagaki
    I need you to be my straight man.
[05:17] Baba
    You always said I was a crap straight man.
[05:18] Shibagaki
    C'mon, please.
[05:20] Shibagaki
    I'll write funnier jokes.
    Be my straight man.
[05:22] Shibagaki
    Interrupt me again!
[05:29] Yamamoto
    The police will probably
    keep questioning us.
[05:33] (Flashback) Yamamoto
    We should get our story straight.
[05:35] (Flashback) Nikaido
    Shouldn't we just tell them the truth?
[05:38] (Flashback) Yamamoto
    The truth? Do you understand what we did?
[05:56] Girl A
    Have you ever seen her house?
[05:58] (Flashback) Girl B
    It's an obvious prefab packed to the brim, right?
[06:01] (Flashback) Girl A
    Yeah. They say that's why she
    spends all her time in the bath.
[06:04] Girl B
    That's hilarious. I bet she gets super wrinkly.
SIGN    My Dream For the Future
SIGN    Super Rich
[06:20] Wadagaki
    Welcome home.
[06:21] (Flashback) Mom
    Sorry I'm late.
[06:23] (Flashback) Mom
    Have you eaten dinner yet?
[06:25] (Flashback) Wadagaki
    Not yet, but you must be tired
    from work, right?
[06:27] (Flashback) Wadagaki
    I'll find something to eat.
[06:30] (Flashback) Mom
    You'll need a lunch for tomorrow.
    I'll make dinner while I'm at it.
[06:33] (Flashback) Mom
    I don't have fried chicken, though.
[06:35] (Flashback) Wadagaki
    Thanks, Mom.
[06:38] (Flashback) Mom
    As someone whose dreams were
    shattered, you look radiant to me.
[06:42] (Flashback) Mom
    You only get one go around in life.
[06:44] (Flashback) Mom
    You gotta do whatever it takes
    to make your dreams come true.
[07:15] Tanaka
    I have nothing left. It's game over.
SIGN    Ksawa
     @Ksawa_2daime
SIGN    Ksawa
SIGN    I was shocked to learn that Donraku's daughter is the dead Mystery Kiss girl and I feel bad for them, but how I'm going to support myself from now on is the bigger, more serious mystery.
[07:38] Yano
    Hit him again! Again!
SIGN    Road Closed
[07:50] Shirakawa
    Did you figure out what
    Odokawa-san's illness is called?
[07:53] Goriki
    Yeah. It's called...
[07:59] (Flashback) Doctor
    Visual agnosia caused
    by executive dysfunction.
[08:04] (Flashback) Goriki
    Visual agnosia...
[08:07] Shirakawa
    What is that?
[08:09] Goriki
    He doesn't know what
    his eyes are looking at.
[08:12] Goriki
    Damage to his brain is causing
    an error in its cognitive function.
[08:23] Shirakawa
    Stop the car, Doctor!
[08:40] Yano
    You're not getting away!
[09:12] Goriki
    Shirakawa-kun!
[09:31] Kabasawa
    Th-This'll go viral!
[10:03] Shibagaki
    Please. One more time.
[10:05] Shibagaki
    Be my straight man one more time.
[10:09] Shibagaki
    Seriously? I'm being interrupted by a car?!
[10:40] Odokawa
    "That's why that day,
    on the day of the accident,
[10:43] Odokawa
    I remember being happy.
[10:46] Odokawa
    My mom put my plastered dad in
    the car and took us for a drive.
[10:52] Odokawa
    It'd been so long since we'd gone
    for a drive as a family.
[10:55] Odokawa
    My dad was sleeping in the back seat,
[10:58] Odokawa
    and my mom seemed like
    she was in a bad mood,
[11:01] Odokawa
    but I was having fun.
[11:03] Odokawa
    It was my first night drive.
[11:06] Odokawa
    The roads and traffic signals and lights
    of the cars were sparkly and pretty."
[11:12] Odokawa
    "When I woke up,
    I was lying in a hospital bed.
[11:16] Odokawa
    My head felt dizzy. I felt weird.
[11:21] Odokawa
    The doctors explained a bunch of stuff
    to me, but I don't remember much.
[11:26] Odokawa
    All I remember is that my dad and mom
    went somewhere after the accident
[11:31] Odokawa
    and that the doctor kind of
    looked like an alligator,
[11:36] Odokawa
    since I had actually become a walrus."
[11:40] Odokawa
    "My relatives and teachers showed up
[11:43] Odokawa
    and had serious conversations
    and told me all kinds of stuff,
[11:48] Odokawa
    but I didn't really care.
[11:51] Odokawa
    I met patients and nurses,
    but it didn't bother me at all.
[11:57] Odokawa
    After all, they were pandas and beavers
    and tortoises and llamas and stuff.
[12:03] Odokawa
    Everyone said they felt sorry for me,
    but I was better off than I was before."
[12:09] Odokawa
    "One day, a tapir showed up
    and said he'd look after me.
[12:15] Odokawa
    I wouldn't have to see
    my old classmates again,
[12:18] Odokawa
    and I'd get to move to Tokyo.
[12:20] Odokawa
    I couldn't imagine anything better.
[12:23] Odokawa
    I was really glad that I'd become a walrus.
[12:28] Odokawa
    I only met the tapir then,
[12:31] Odokawa
    but I wanted to go thank him
    properly someday."
[13:00] Shirakawa
    Queixada!
[13:09] Goriki
    Hey, over here! Hurry!
[13:20] Goriki
    Odokawa!
[13:21] Shirakawa
    Odokawa-san.
[13:24] Goriki
    Odokawa!
[13:25] Shirakawa
    Odokawa-san.
[13:30] Goriki
    Odokawa.
[13:33] Shirakawa
    Odokawa-san...
[13:41] Goriki
    Hey, Odokawa. What do I look like to you?
[13:45] Odokawa
    A human.
[13:47] Goriki
    I see. Does that scare you?
[13:49] Odokawa
    No, I'm not scared. I'm okay.
[13:53] Shirakawa
    What about me?
[13:59] Shirakawa
    What? You're scared of me?
[14:01] Odokawa
    No. You're... pretty.
[14:07] Goriki
    Looks like he still can't talk to women.
[14:31] Koshiro
    Your plan ended in failure, Dobu.
[14:33] Koshiro
    But don't worry. I'll let you go.
[14:36] Dobu
    Daimon!
[14:38] Koshiro
    Just kidding. I'm the younger brother!
[14:40] Dobu
    That's not a funny prank.
[14:42] Koshiro
    Odokawa said the same thing.
[14:44] Koshiro
    He said only relatives think it's funny.
[14:46] Dobu
    Why are you here?
[14:47] Koshiro
    An officer will be arriving with your arrest
    warrant soon. I thought I'd let you know.
[14:51] Dobu
    Why'd you tell me that? What if I run away?
[14:55] Koshiro
    Then I'll shoot you again. Bang!
[14:59] Dobu
    That shot was you?
[15:01] Koshiro
    I got in a lot of trouble for it,
    but I got to arrest your gang.
[15:04] Koshiro
    No big deal.
[15:05] Dobu
    You know what'll happen if I get arrested.
[15:08] Dobu
    Your brother will go down, too.
[15:09] Koshiro
    That's right. After all,
    what my brother did was bad.
[15:13] Koshiro
    Crimes should be punished.
[15:15] Koshiro
    Evil can never be destroyed completely,
    but I'll keep maintaining the peace.
[15:19] Koshiro
    After all, I'm a police officer!
[15:29] Shirakawa
    Would you like some jelly?
    Or would you prefer pudding?
[15:32] Odokawa
    That's enough. Just sit. It's fine.
[15:36] Newscaster
    Yesterday the MPD arrested
    Mystery Kiss member Rui Nikaido,
[15:40] Newscaster
    who they had been questioning
    in connection to the murder
SIGN    Suspects Arrested in Yuki Mitsuya-san Murder
     Body Dumped in Sea After Killing
[15:44] Newscaster
    of Mystery Kiss member Yuki Mitsuya-san.
SIGN    Arrested: Rui Nikaido (18)
SIGN    Suspected of dumping body in the sea after killing fellow group member at agency office
[15:48] Newscaster
    Mystery Kiss manager Fuyuki Yamamoto,
SIGN    Arrested: Unemployed
    Togo Sekiguchi (26)
SIGN    Arrested: Employee
    Fuyuki Yamamoto (34)
SIGN    Arrested: Unemployed
    Haruhito Yano (28)
[15:52] Newscaster
    Haruhito Yano, unemployed,
    and Togo Sekiguchi, also unemployed,
[15:58] Newscaster
    were arrested for abandoning a body.
[16:01] Newscaster
    Rui Nikaido is denying the charges...
[16:05] Odokawa
    Oh, right. I just remembered.
[16:07] Shirakawa
    What?
[16:08] Odokawa
    N-Nothing. It's got nothing to do with you.
[16:11] Shirakawa
    You're still acting shy?
[16:14] Shirakawa
    They've been reporting
    on this story since this morning.
[16:17] Shirakawa
    Odokawa-san, you'll probably
    be interviewed at some point,
[16:20] Shirakawa
    but once things settle down,
    I'd like to go to the zoo.
[16:23] Odokawa
    What? With me?
[16:27] Goriki
    I brought someone who said
    he wanted to see you, Odokawa.
[16:30] Imai
    Odokawa-sama, are you feeling all right?
[16:33] Odokawa
    Thankfully, I'm doing okay.
[16:36] Odokawa
    Oh, it's Imai.
[16:38] Imai
    That's great!
[16:39] Odokawa
    More importantly, are you okay? That idol...
[16:43] Imai
    It came as a huge shock,
[16:45] Imai
    and if she really did do it,
    that would be a terrible thing,
[16:49] Imai
    but when I think about it, getting to visit
    an idol in prison is a precious experience.
[16:53] Odokawa
    You're looking at this really positively.
[16:56] Imai
    So once I visit her—even if I don't,
[16:58] Imai
    I'll decide whether or not
    I want to continue supporting her.
[17:02] Imai
    Oh, right.
[17:05] Imai
    The police retrieved the money
    that fell into the ocean.
[17:08] Imai
    I know some of it's missing,
    but this is for you.
[17:12] Odokawa
    I don't want this.
[17:13] Imai
    Please, you have to take it!
[17:15] Imai
    I caused all kinds of trouble for you,
    and you helped me a lot.
[17:19] Shirakawa
    He seems insistent. Why don't you accept it?
[17:21] Goriki
    Yeah. It can't hurt to have it.
[17:25] Odokawa
    Yeah, but I wouldn't know how to use it.
[17:28] Goriki
    You could pay off Kakihana's debt.
[17:30] Odokawa
    No. I'll make him pay it off himself.
[17:33] Odokawa
    Oh, I can think of one use for it.
[17:35] Imai
    You'll accept it, then?!
[17:37] Imai
    Well, I should get going.
[17:39] Imai
    There's a Rui-tan fan meeting to
    discuss what we'll do going forward.
[17:43] Odokawa
    Right. That reminds me.
[17:46] Odokawa
    The girl I drove late at night on October 4th
    to the Mystery Kiss office...
[17:50] Imai
    Huh? What are you talking about?
[17:52] Odokawa
    Nothing. I guess I should tell the police.
[17:55] Imai
    Well, goodbye. I'll visit again.
[18:00] Goriki
    One use? You mean the traffic
    accident orphan foundation?
[18:03] Odokawa
    I knew you'd figure it out.
[18:05] Goriki
    Do you have any idea
    who to return the money to?
[18:10] Odokawa
    I'm sure my landlady knows.
[18:12] Goriki
    Why don't you give it to him yourself?
[18:15] Goriki
    He's a tapir. You know who that is?
[18:19] Odokawa
    I see. A tapir.
[18:23] Odokawa
    So that's how it is.
[18:24] Goriki
    Also, Odokawa, this is hard to say,
    but I need to confirm something.
[18:29] Odokawa
    What is it?
[18:30] Goriki
    What's inside your house?
[18:41] Kondo
    Oh, no! He's falling!
SIGN    Comedy Duos Compete to Survive!
SIGN    Who Will Fall?
SIGN    Bonnou Illumination
SIGN    Yamabiko
SIGN    Reserved for the day
    -Yamabiko
[18:58] Kuroda
    You all better now?
[19:01] Odokawa
    I was always healthy. I can sleep now, too.
[19:05] Kuroda
    Glad to hear it.
[19:07] Odokawa
    Confidently speaking to a human like you
    is a huge step forward for me.
[19:14] Odokawa
    I'm still not comfortable
    around women, though.
[19:17] Kuroda
    I see.
[19:19] Odokawa
    The police haven't arrested you.
[19:22] Kuroda
    That's because I have
    exceptional subordinates.
[19:25] Odokawa
    I'm sure a lot of people
    suffered because of you,
[19:29] Odokawa
    but I'm not here to criticize you for that.
[19:31] Odokawa
    That's not my job, and you've probably
    saved more people than that.
[19:37] Kuroda
    I'm going to retire.
[19:39] Kuroda
    Not only did I fail to save
    Don-chan's daughter,
[19:42] Kuroda
    but my subordinates were involved.
[19:44] Kuroda
    Talk about putting the cart
    before the horse.
[19:46] Odokawa
    I heard from Dobu
    that you have only one rule.
[19:51] Kuroda
    Yeah. "Don't kill people." That's all.
[19:57] Odokawa
    I see.
[20:02] Odokawa
    There's close to 100 million yen in here.
[20:05] Odokawa
    I want you to do as much as you can with it.
[20:07] Odokawa
    Even if it's just helping the kids
    you're currently supporting,
[20:09] Odokawa
    don't tell them until
    you give them that doll.
[20:14] Odokawa
    You've been a great help
    until now. Thank you.
[20:54] Odokawa
    Great. It's just a cat.
[21:01] Kondo
    Let's get started. Hello.
[21:02] Kondo
    We're Bonnou Illumination.
[21:03] Fukumoto
    We sure did get roped into this.
[21:05] Kondo
    That's right. We're pinch-hitters.
[21:08] Fukumoto
    For Homosapiens.
[21:09] Kondo
    Don't say their name.
[21:10] Fukumoto
    There's nothing wrong
    with saying their name.
[21:12] Kondo
    Right. It's okay to mention their name.
[21:13] Fukutomo
    Can you believe Baba-san
    was dating a murderer?
[21:16] Kondo
    You're not supposed to say that.
[21:17] Fukumoto
    Everyone will creeped out unless I say it.
[21:19] Kondo
    She's still only a suspect.
[21:21] Fukumoto
    Forget about that. We're here
    to produce a proper radio show.
[21:26] Wadagaki
    Mom, how are you?
[21:28] Wadagaki
    Yeah, I transferred to a bigger agency.
[21:31] Wadagaki
    Yeah. Things are going so
    well, it's almost scary.
[21:34] Wadagaki
    At first, I hounded the manager
    after I failed an audition.
[21:39] Wadagaki
    Thinking about it now makes me laugh.
[21:42] Wadagaki
    I was frustrated, though.
[21:45] Wadagaki
    Yeah, it went well.
[21:48] Wadagaki
    If they hadn't become famous after that,
    I think I would've been content.
[21:52] Wadagaki
    But when I heard they'd be releasing their
    first CD, I couldn't sit still anymore.
[21:57] Wadagaki
    Yeah, everything's going well.
[22:01] Wadagaki
    Honestly, I wasn't expecting
    to lose someone else,
[22:04] Wadagaki
    but I get more attention because of that.
[22:07] Wadagaki
    I'm thinking about losing another
    and becoming a solo act.
[22:12] Wadagaki
    What? I'm too greedy?
[22:15] Wadagaki
    No, nothing for now.
[22:18] Wadagaki
    All I headed out to do was find
    the taxi I rode in then.
[22:23] Wadagaki
    I think I found it.
[22:25] Wadagaki
    It was a total coincidence.
    I must be lucky after all.
SIGN    Aozora Comedy Festival
[22:28] Wadagaki
    Everything's going my way.
[22:30] Wadagaki
    I'll tell you more about it later.
[22:33] Wadagaki
    Don't worry. It'll go well again.
SIGN    Uninstall "Zooden?"
    All data will be erased
    when this app is uninstalled.
SIGN    Cancel
SIGN    Uninstall
[22:36] Wadagaki
    Over the end of the year—
[22:39] Wadagaki
    Actually, I'll tell you about it later.
SIGN    Must-read!
SIGN    Foolproof Methods For Finding a Job
[22:42] Wadagaki
    Yeah. Will you make fried chicken
    again for me sometime?
[22:46] Wadagaki
    Like you said, I'm gonna do whatever it takes
    to make my dream come true.
[22:57] Boss A
    Kakihana, let's get lunch.
[22:59] Kakihana
    Okay.
[23:15] Odokawa
    All right.
[23:22] Odokawa
    Hop on in.
[23:28] Odokawa
    Where to?