1 - Family

Source: Crunchyroll
Translator:
Editor:
Timer:
QC:
(Please feel free to edit the speaker names if incomplete or inaccurate. Names are handled on a best-effort basis depending on the info on the source file. Dialogue is left as is.)
[00:00] ---
    Here we go!
[00:01] ---
    How's everyone doing out there?
[00:04] ---
    Frankenstein Family starts today!
SIGN    Tanisu
     Sugiyama Riho
[00:08] ---
    I play Tanisu, the protagonist.
[00:10] ---
    I'm Sugiyama Riho. Nice to meet you!
[00:12] ---
    That's all wrong!
[00:14] ---
    Here we go!
[00:16] ---
    The protagonist is Aisuri.
SIGN    Aisuri
     Mori Nanako
[00:17] ---
    I play Aisuri. I'm Mori Nanako.
[00:19] ---
    It's nice to meet you.
[00:20] ---
    Hold on a minute!
SIGN    Suishi
     Ikuta Yoshiko
[00:23] ---
    I'm Ikuta Yoshiko, and I play
    the real protagonist, Suishi.
[00:27] ---
    Wait, wait, wait!
[00:28] ---
    Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!
[00:30] ---
    That was very cute, but...
[00:30] ---
    It was cute.
[00:31] ---
    I'm the protagonist.
[00:33] ---
    I am!
[00:33] ---
    No, I am.
[00:34] ---
    It's me.
[00:34] ---
    This is weird! It's weird!
    It's weird! It's me!
[00:37] ---
    I'm the oldest sister.
[00:38] ---
    We're siblings, so this is important...
[00:41] ---
    I know! We'll decide with
    rock-paper-scissors!
[00:43] ---
    What, without the other two?
SIGN    Snow
     Namikawa Daisuke
SIGN    Ashisu
     Hayami Saori
[00:44] ---
    Forget those two!
[00:45] ---
    We'll decide this among ourselves.
[00:47] ---
    Okay. Let's go.
[00:48] ---
    Whoever wins gets it.
[00:50] ---
    First comes rock. Rock-paper-scissors!
[00:53] ---
    Again! Again! Again!
SIGN    Frankenstein Family
SIGN    Coming up next!
[00:56] ---
    We keep doing the same thing.
    What's going on here?
SIGN    Frankenstein Family
SIGN    #1: Family
[03:07] tani
    All done for the day!
[03:12] tani
    I'm back!
[03:27] sno
    There we go.
[03:29] tan
    Thanks, Snow-niisan.
[03:32] tan
    We're back!
[03:43] ai
    Hey, I'm starved! What're we eating?
[03:48] sui
    Sweet-and-sour pork today.
[03:50] tan
    Stop reading my mind, Suishi-neesan!
[03:56] ai
    I don't need vegetables. Make it all meat.
[03:59] tan
    Ashisu-neesan?
[04:05] ashi
    Today's sunlight tastes like strawberries!
[04:08] tan
    That's not what I was asking...
[04:11] tan
    Hold on. I'll get it ready soon.
[04:16] tan
    Mom and Dad were arrested.
[04:19] tan
    They're what you'd call mad scientists.
[04:21] tan
    They considered their kids
    to be human guinea pigs.
[04:25] tan
    I was the one exception.
[04:28] (Flashback) mom
    We're doing photosynthesis tests.
[04:29] (Flashback) mom
    From now on, you're only
    allowed to drink water.
[04:32] (Flashback) ashi
    Okay!
[04:32] (Flashback) mom
    Tanisu, it's time for your studies.
[04:34] (Flashback) tan
    'Kay.
[04:39] (Flashback) mom
    Aisuri, when you're done
    with that, it's time to hunt.
[04:42] (Flashback) ai
    Got it!
[04:43] (Flashback) mom
    Tanisu, your tutor is here.
[04:46] (Flashback) tan
    'Kay!
[04:49] (Flashback) mom
    Stand! Become human!
[04:52] (Flashback) mom
    Too slow.
[04:53] (Flashback) mom
    Tanisu, it's time for your studies.
[04:55] (Flashback) ---
    'Kay!
[05:01] (Flashback) mom
    Put it on. Tell me if you hear anything.
[05:06] (Flashback) mom
    Tanisu, go to bed now.
[05:09] tan
    I didn't realize it until they got arrested,
[05:11] tan
    but keeping a household is hard...
[05:14] tan
    What is that?
[05:15] ai
    I see you!
[05:32] ai
    You're not going anywhere!
[05:56] ashi
    She's quite the tomboy, isn't she?
[05:58] tan
    I bought all this stuff for us...
[06:01] ashi
    I'll see what that was.
[06:13] tan
    Nothing ever seems to go right...
[06:20] tan
    Well, should we go out for dinner?
[06:28] ai
    What'll we get? Cockroaches? Cicadas?
[06:30] tan
    I don't think we can eat that stuff.
[06:36] ashi
    Don't worry about me. I only
    need sunlight and water!
[06:42] sui
    I'll pass, too.
[06:45] tan
    Really?
[06:48] sui
    It's noisy outside.
[06:49] snow
    C-Come on, there's no sunlight
    at night, and Aisuri needs...
[06:56] snow
    Forget it, I guess.
[06:57] tan
    Just follow me.
[07:01] girl
    Today, famous animation director Miyada
[07:04] girl
    reneged on the retirement
    he announced the other day.
[07:08] tan
    Let's just see how it turns out.
[07:10] tan
    I'd prefer not to have to
    use this medicine again...
[07:14] girl
    Now for our next story.
[07:15] girl
    The mysterious explosion on the island
    laboratory several days ago—
[07:55] shop
    Thank you for coming.
[07:57] shop
    How many?
[07:59] tan
    Five, please!
[08:01] wait
    Here's your tea.
[08:05] snow
    What's this about?
[08:07] tan
    You use it to wash your cup
    before you drink your tea.
[08:13] tan
    Like this.
[08:23] sui
    Aisuri-neesan is thinking, "What a pain."
[08:27] ai
    You're thinking it, too, I bet!
[08:34] tan
    That's how you show gratitude to the staff.
[08:39] tan
    Now I'm going to order our food.
[08:42] tan
    Put a mark next to the name
    of the food you want to eat...
[08:52] tan
    And we're done!
[08:53] ai
    Look at you, grinning like a fool!
[08:54] ai
    We ain't even eaten yet.
[08:59] ashi
    You really must love this restaurant.
[09:03] ashi
    Tani-chan?
[09:05] tan
    It's just...
[09:06] tan
    This is our first time...
[09:09] tan
    Eating together like a normal family...
[09:30] ai
    So what?
[09:32] tan
    It was kind of a dream of mine...
[09:39] man
    Here you are.
[09:40] tan
    Here it is!
[09:47] tan
    Let's eat it before it gets cold!
[09:53] man
    Wh-Where did this dog come from?
[09:58] tan
    I'm sorry! Forgive me!
[09:59] ashi
    Stop that, pup!
[10:16] ashi
    Hot, hot, hot!
[10:19] man
    What's with those people? So loud...
[10:22] tan
    If it's hot, you should use the chopsticks.
[10:25] tan
    Hey, don't spit on it!
[10:27] ai
    Shut up!
[10:30] tan
    Ashisu-neesan, you try some, too.
[10:33] ashi
    No, thank you.
[10:36] tan
    Hey...
[10:38] tan
    Suishi-neesa—
[10:40] sui
    I'll pass.
[10:49] all
    So annoying...
[10:51] all
    That makes me sick.
[10:54] all
    Annoying.
[10:55] all
    Who are those people?
[10:57] all
    They're freaking me out.
[10:59] all
    I hope they'll leave soon.
[11:06] all
    Annoying.
[11:07] all
    Annoying.
[11:07] all
    I wish they'd just leave.
[11:09] all
    They don't fit in.
[11:10] all
    They're filthy.
[11:11] all
    They're gross.
[11:12] all
    I wish they'd disappear.
[11:18] tan
    That's enough!
[11:21] tan
    We're not in the lab anymore!
[11:23] tan
    We have to live like normal people!
[11:26] tan
    We have no one to rely on.
    We don't have much money.
[11:30] tan
    But you won't even try to
    learn how to be normal!
[11:33] tan
    If you don't change, you'll—
[11:38] ai
    We'll what?
[11:40] ai
    All you do is complain all damn day.
[11:46] ai
    We ain't normal.
[11:49] ai
    What's the matter with that?
[11:50] ai
    Why do we gotta be your idea of "normal"?
[11:57] ai
    What even is your idea of "normal"?
[12:11] tan
    It's...
[12:18] (Flashback) man
    You've never been out of here?
[12:22] (Flashback) man
    The outside world is...
[12:25] tan
    Ever since that day, I realized I wanted
    to live in the outside world with you all.
[12:33] tan
    But in the end,
    maybe I was just being selfish.
[12:46] tan
    Snow-niisan. Ashisu-neesan!
[12:48] ai
    Hey, you dumb mutt!
[12:51] snow
    My dog side doesn't handle
    this atmosphere well,
[12:54] snow
    and I've always wanted to try chopsticks...
[12:57] ashi
    This is much harder than I imagined it to be!
[13:00] snow
    Tanisu does it so well...
[13:05] tan
    You'll pick it up right away with practice.
[13:07] tan
    See?
[13:10] tan
    No matter what life we try to make,
    we'll never stop being who we are.
[13:14] tan
    Here. For you, too, Aisuri-neesan.
[13:25] ai
    What're you staring at? Got a problem?!
[13:29] tan
    No, everyone just go on and eat!
[13:38] all
    Delicious!
[13:42] ai
    Would you like one of my mushrooms?
[13:45] ai
    Bring another round!
[13:47] ai
    Fill up the plates!
[13:51] tan
    Can't you slow down?
[13:52] sui
    "If someone makes trouble again,
    this will be our last time eating out,"
[13:56] sui
    Tanisu thinks.
[13:58] ai
    Who do you mean?
[14:00] tan
    I wasn't thinking that.
[14:02] tan
    I'm having fun being here with everyone.
[14:04] tan
    Suishi-neesan, please don't ruin this!
[14:09] ashi
    I really do think it's poor manners,
[14:11] ashi
    so you should hold the
    chopsticks with one hand.
[14:13] ashi
    See? Like this?
[14:15] ai
    I get it, okay?
[14:23] tani
    The truth is, there's also
    a thing called a fork...
[14:27] tani
    You use it like this.
[14:30] ai
    You oughta show me that crap from the start!
[14:39] waiter
    Thank you for coming.
[14:45] cus
    Those people were pretty amazing, huh?
[14:47] cus
    Yeah, all in cosplay and
    doing sleight-of-hand!
[15:01] snow
    What's the matter?
[15:23] ai
    What's with you?
[15:25] ai
    Was it so expensive it's making you cry?
[15:27] tan
    It's nothing.
[15:33] sui
    Tanisu...
[15:34] tan
    I was just remembering some things.
[15:37] tan
    It's tough having such an eccentric family,
[15:39] tan
    but as long as we're
    together, we'll work it out.
[15:41] tan
    After all, we're family!
SIGN    Frankenstein Extras
[16:18] ---
    Frankenstein Extras!
[16:21] ---
    Today's theme is...
SIGN    Today's theme is...
[16:25] ---
    If you were going to be modified,
    what power would you want?
[16:30] ---
    No limits on that question, huh?
[16:32] ---
    That's right!
[16:34] ---
    What power would I want?
[16:35] ---
    Well?
[16:37] ---
    The minute I saw the question,
    something came to mind.
SIGN    Aisuri Mori Nanako
SIGN    Suishi Ikuta Yoshiko
SIGN    Tanisu Sugiyama Riho
[16:40] ---
    If I could have just one wish...
[16:44] ---
    I'd want to be a boy.
[16:47] ---
    What? Is that a power?
[16:48] ---
    It is!
[16:48] ---
    It's about modification, right?
[16:50] ---
    Like how Snow-niisan can
    become a dog, you know?
[16:52] ---
    I want to become a boy.
[16:54] ---
    My feelings for boys transcends "like".
[16:57] ---
    I like boys.
[16:58] ---
    I like boys.
[16:59] ---
    Like.
[16:59] ---
    Like.
[17:00] ---
    Want to be one!
[17:01] ---
    You?
[17:01] ---
    Yes, I want to be one!
[17:03] ---
    You don't just want to dote on them?
[17:04] ---
    I want to dote on them,
    yes, and take care of them.
[17:07] ---
    But it surpasses that into wanting to be one.
[17:10] ---
    I see!
[17:12] ---
    If that had been the last one we said,
    that would have been a great punchline.
[17:16] ---
    But when you start with that,
    nothing we say will be interesting.
[17:21] ---
    Not as funny.
[17:22] ---
    Why?!
[17:23] ---
    I voice a lot of boys.
[17:25] ---
    I voice a lot of boy characters,
[17:28] ---
    so I observe a lot of boys.
[17:30] ---
    Like a stalker?
[17:32] ---
    Like normal. Very quietly.
[17:34] ---
    I sit around in parks and watch boys playing.
[17:38] ---
    Isn't that creepy?
[17:39] ---
    It's not creepy! I just people watch.
[17:41] ---
    Don't the mothers think, "What's with her?"
[17:42] ---
    It's fine!
[17:43] ---
    For example.
[17:44] ---
    This is just an example.
[17:45] ---
    You're in the park sitting on a bench.
[17:48] ---
    If a cat walks by, you watch 'em.
[17:50] ---
    You're thinkin' "Oh, how cute, how cute."
[17:52] ---
    'cause it's a cat.
[17:53] ---
    Same with dogs.
[17:55] ---
    It's kinda like that.
SIGN    Inexplicable Kansai Accent
[17:59] ---
    Wait a minute, don't the moms...
[18:02] ---
    Miho-chan, are you a psychopath?
[18:03] ---
    No, I'm not! It's normal!
[18:05] ---
    The boy characters I play experience
    fun and joy all the time,
[18:10] ---
    but the joy experienced
    by boys in real life,
[18:14] ---
    like when they're playing
    on a jungle gym and such...
[18:16] ---
    I don't think I could really get
    the feel of it unless I became one.
[18:22] ---
    So I'd like to be one if I could.
[18:24] ---
    Because I'm playing boy roles.
[18:25] ---
    Incidentally, what kind of boy would you be?
[18:28] ---
    Um... Ah... Er...
[18:32] ---
    Hmm...
[18:32] ---
    Is it that hard a decision?
[18:34] ---
    I'm really not sure.
[18:35] ---
    I like very quiet little boys.
[18:38] ---
    Oops, I said little boys.
[18:39] ---
    I like cheerful, mischievous,
    innocent little boys.
[18:44] ---
    And I like pure little boys like Tanisu.
[18:47] ---
    Please stop saying "little boys."
[18:49] ---
    Sorry!
[18:50] ---
    I love beautiful boys, too.
[18:52] ---
    I see.
[18:53] ---
    But what kind of boy I'd
    be is a tricky question.
[18:55] ---
    See, there's characters you like.
[18:57] ---
    You don't quite want to be
     the character you like.
[19:02] ---
    You want to become a character
    a little different from that.
[19:04] ---
    I really am a daydreamer.
[19:05] ---
    But you want to be a boy?
[19:07] ---
    I want to be a boy, so just having
    that ability would be great.
[19:11] ---
    Is that why you're good at playing boys?
[19:13] ---
    But I want to be one...
[19:15] ---
    So being able to play Tanisu makes me happy.
[19:21] ---
    I'm happy for you!
[19:23] ---
    I love it. It's so much fun.
[19:25] ---
    Please enjoy Sugiyama's
     wholehearted boy acting.
[19:29] ---
    I hope you enjoy it.
[19:29] ---
    It seems like everyone really enjoys it.
[19:32] ---
    It's fun. I really do love Tanisu.
[19:35] ---
    But this segment isn't about
    asking people to dote on boys...
[19:38] ---
    Oh, right.
[19:39] ---
    That's right. "What would you want
     to be if you were modified?"
[19:42] ---
    Right, I got off-topic.
[19:45] ---
    I get that you'd want to
    be modified into a boy.
[19:47] ---
    Yes, a boy.
[19:49] ---
    Was it too powerful? Too powerful?
SIGN    If you were going to be modified, what power would you want?
[19:52] ---
    I would want... let's see.
[19:55] ---
    I would really want the
    power to sleep anywhere.
[20:00] ---
    You can't sleep anywhere?
[20:01] ---
    Well, you know... people who can
    sleep in a moving vehicle and such?
[20:07] ---
    I really admire them.
[20:09] ---
    You can't do that?
[20:10] ---
    I can't sleep like that at all.
[20:13] ---
    So if you have an event in Osaka,
    you can't sleep on the train?
[20:15] ---
    I can sleep there!
[20:16] ---
    You can?
[20:18] ---
    You mean more like short naps?
[20:20] ---
    Yes, short naps.
[20:21] ---
    How long do you need to get to sleep, then?
[20:27] ---
    I need about an hour to get to sleep.
[20:30] ---
    There are people who can fall
    asleep anywhere, you know?
[20:32] ---
    I can sleep anywhere.
[20:35] ---
    You have what I want!
[20:37] ---
    I really can sleep anywhere.
[20:39] ---
    You can?
[20:40] ---
    With just a ten minute
    break, I'm fast asleep.
[20:43] ---
    I sleep so hard I'm drooling.
[20:44] ---
    Really? I wish I could do that.
[20:46] ---
    I think more people have
    that ability than not.
[20:50] ---
    You're delicate.
[20:51] ---
    I'm very delicate.
[20:52] ---
    I work here in this location in the morning.
[20:57] ---
    Then I go to the next location.
[21:00] ---
    It tires me out.
[21:02] ---
    If I could just get a nap in then.
[21:04] ---
    It's really refreshing.
[21:05] ---
    Very refreshing.
[21:08] ---
    I understand how you feel.
[21:11] ---
    That's too bad.
[21:12] ---
    It's harder than you'd think.
[21:13] ---
    Annoying, right? We work for so long.
[21:15] ---
    It's very hard when you have
    multiple jobs in one day.
[21:17] ---
    It's really exhausting if you have a lot of
    recordings where you really need to focus.
[21:21] ---
    And I don't sleep well.
[21:23] ---
    Wow.
[21:24] ---
    You need sleep powers.
[21:27] ---
    I don't need modification. I need health.
[21:29] ---
    "Health" sounds a little...
[21:32] ---
    I want health.
[21:36] ---
    I'd want a modification that lets me
    eat all I like and not gain weight.
SIGN    If you were going to be modified, what power would you want?
[21:39] ---
    Yeah, totally!
[21:41] ---
    The ultimate request.
[21:44] ---
    I love eating, but I put
    on weight very easily.
[21:49] ---
    I put on weight so fast. I just balloon up.
[21:52] ---
    Depending on how much you eat?
[21:53] ---
    I have a catchphrase: My hobby is dieting,
    my special skill is the rebound.
[21:58] ---
    That's so funny. That's too funny!
[22:02] ---
    I always say that when I introduce myself,
    but I'd like to not say it anymore.
[22:07] ---
    No more diets.
[22:09] ---
    "I can't put on weight, it's so much trouble."
[22:12] ---
    "I can't put on weight,
    no matter how much I eat.."
[22:15] ---
    I've always wanted to say that.
[22:17] ---
    Then you'll get punched.
[22:19] ---
    But there are some girls so thin they
    want to put on weight, you know?
[22:23] ---
    There are!
[22:24] ---
    They have that metabolism.
[22:24] ---
    I wish I could be that way.
[22:27] ---
    I think all girls want to be that way.
[22:30] ---
    If a modification could do
    that, it's what I'd want.
[22:31] ---
    True.
[22:32] ---
    We're so basic.
[22:35] ---
    So very basic.
[22:37] ---
    That's too practical.
[22:39] ---
    There are lots of abilities out there,
[22:43] ---
    and a lot of them would be great,
    and you'd like to have them,
[22:46] ---
    but they also come with
    problems of their own.
[22:48] ---
    Yeah, they do.
[22:50] ---
    So I think it's best to do your
     best with what you have.
[22:54] ---
    You sound like a textbook.
[22:57] ---
    It's best to do what you
    can with what you have.
[23:00] ---
    Well said.
[23:02] ---
    Let's all do our best with what we have.
SIGN    Frankenstein Extras
SIGN    Next week...
[23:08] ---
    I think everyone wants this, but I want ???
[23:11] ---
    What? My heart is pounding now...
SIGN    Preview
[23:20] ---
    I'm having trouble getting
    Aisuri-neesan to do what I say.
[23:24] ---
    She says that if I do all the
    housework myself, she'll be good.
[23:28] ---
    Oh, well. I'd better go shopping!
[23:32] ---
    Wait, who's this cute girl?!
[23:37] ---
    Next time, on Frankenstein Family*:
SIGN    #2: Heartbeat
[23:39] ---
    "Heartbeat."*
[23:40] ---
    Catch it, okay?